Shows / Recovering Out Loud
Recovering Out Loud
Sobriety you can actually use — from someone who lived it twice. I'm Anthony. I got sober in 2015, relapsed after 7.5 years, and rebuilt from zero. Now I'm an addiction counsellor-in-training sharing what actually works in recovery — not theory, real tools. Every episode covers the real struggles of staying sober: emotional sobriety, relapse prevention, identity, people-pleasing, shame, trauma, mental health, and the messy middle nobody talks about. If you're newly sober, years in, or…
Episodes
Recovering Out LoudThe Personality Sobriety Stole From Me (And What I Found Underneath)
Everyone expects sobriety to reveal the real you — calmer, freer, finally yourself. What nobody warns you about is that the first thing sobriety does is…
Recovering Out Loud13th Stepping: The Predatory Behaviour Recovery Won't Talk About
Predatory behavior in recovery spaces is real, and most people refuse to name it. In this solo episode, I share what 13th stepping is, why it puts newcomers —…
Recovering Out LoudMember, Attender or Pretender: Which One Are You in Recovery Right Now?
In this episode of Recovering Out Loud, Anthony introduces a framework he calls Member, Attender, Pretender — the three roles people cycle through in recovery…
Recovering Out LoudIs Addiction a Disease or a Choice? The Different Models That Explain Addiction
Is addiction a disease… or a choice? For decades, psychologists, doctors, and people in recovery have debated this question. Some experts argue addiction is a…
Recovering Out LoudThe 5 Lies Addiction Tells You — And Why They Sound So Reasonable
That voice in your head — the one that shows up right before a relapse — isn't random. It's patterned. It's predictable. And once you can name it, it loses…
Recovering Out LoudStaying Sober When You Want to Drink : The Triggers Nobody Warns You About
Patio season hits different when you’re sober. In this episode, I break down the reality of navigating patios, bars, and summer social environments in recovery…
Recovering Out LoudWhy We Self-Sabotage When Life Starts Getting Better In Addiction Recovery
Why do people sometimes destroy the very progress they worked so hard to build? In recovery, something strange often happens. Life begins improving —…
Recovering Out LoudCodependency in Recovery: Boundaries, Dating Apps, and Emotional Sobriety
Today I sat down with my good friend Kaitlin B. Getting sober is one thing. Learning how to live with your feelings is another. In this episode, we get into…
Recovering Out LoudIsolation in Recovery: When Being Alone Becomes Dangerous
Is Isolation worse for you than drinking? Lets talk about it There’s a stage in recovery that doesn’t get talked about enough. It’s not the chaos of addiction…
Recovering Out LoudThe Dangerous Lie of “Functional Alcoholism”
When people picture addiction, they often imagine someone who has lost everything. But that’s not always the reality. Some people lose jobs, relationships, and…
Recovering Out LoudWhy Some People Become Addicted (And Others Don’t)
Why can some people drink or use drugs casually… while others lose control the moment they start? For decades people believed addiction was simply about…
Recovering Out LoudI’m Struggling | The Diary of An Addict Part 1
In this episode of Recovering Out Loud, Anthony opens up about what it really means to get current in recovery. He talks about the danger of pretending…
Recovering Out LoudClosing Safe Consumption Sites: Progress or a Dangerous Mistake
The Great Debate... Ontario’s HART Hubs vs Harm Reduction | Ontario is shifting its addiction response with the rollout of HART Hubs — short for Homelessness…
Recovering Out Loud10 Lessons From 10 Years in Addiction Recovery
What actually keeps someone sober long-term? After spending the last 10 years in and out of recovery, I’ve learned some powerful lessons that completely…
Recovering Out LoudCross Addiction Explained: From Alcohol to Work, Gym, Gambling & More
Many people believe that once they quit drugs or alcohol, the addiction is over. But for many in recovery, the addiction doesn’t disappear — it just changes…
Recovering Out LoudHow Addiction Impacts Families (And What You Can Do to Help)
Addiction doesn’t only affect the person using substances — it affects everyone around them. In this episode of Recovering Out Loud, Anthony shares a deeply…
Recovering Out LoudHow to Use Spirituality in Recovery - Why Willpower Alone Isn’t Enough
In this episode, I break down what spirituality actually is — especially for people in recovery who don’t believe in God, grew up religious, or feel triggered…
Recovering Out LoudAnger and Resentment: The Emotional Trap That Leads to Relapse
In this episode of Recovering Out Loud, Anthony dives deep into one of the most dangerous emotional patterns in addiction recovery: resentment. Often called…
Recovering Out LoudWhy Triggers and Obsessions Exist After You Quit — and Why They Go Away
Have you ever been having a normal day when a smell, a song, or a place suddenly pulls you back into the past? In this episode, we talk about intrusive…
Recovering Out LoudComplacency in Recovery: When “I’m Fine” Becomes Dangerous
Complacency in recovery rarely announces itself. It creeps in quietly—disguised as comfort, routine, and “I’m fine.” In this episode, Anthony Degasperis breaks…
Recovering Out LoudAbstinent or in Recovery? What’s the Difference—and Why It Matters
“You can be sober… and still be miserable.” You cannot be miserable and sober for long - it doesn't work A lot of people hear sobriety and assume it…
Recovering Out LoudPerception in Recovery : Pain Is Inevitable. Suffering Is Optional
my apologies in advanced for the poor video quality on this one Why can two people experience the same trauma in recovery — and one relapse while the other…
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We Were Dancing Naked on Tables Before We Finally Found Recovery
Welcome to Soul School. Today i sat down with Jessica and Nicole from the Soul School Podcast and we got real deep to uncover, discover and discard old ideas…
Recovering Out Loud10-Minute Mindfulness Guided Meditation for Addiction Recovery | Ride Urges Without Relapsing
Cravings don’t mean you’re failing. They mean your nervous system is activated. This 10-minute mindfulness meditation for addiction recovery is designed to…
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I Went to Jail Multiple Times : Shame, Secrecy, and Losing Integrity in Recovery
This episode is a raw, unfiltered conversation about relapse after long-term sobriety, shame, integrity, and why early recovery relationships can quietly…
Recovering Out LoudEmotional Sobriety: Staying Sober When Your Feelings Aren’t
We talk a lot about getting sober — but far less about what happens after the substances are gone. In this episode, I break down emotional sobriety: what it…
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I Lived in a Crack House : The Truth About Desperation Before Recovery Clicks
Relapse doesn’t usually happen because someone “stops caring.” It happens when the mind becomes unsafe — when fear, shame, isolation, and obsession quietly…
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My Wife Caught Me Doing Coke : Sober, But Still Struggling: The Part Recovery Podcasts Skip
Today i sat down with my good friend Ray. Relapse doesn’t usually start with picking up a substance. It starts quietly — with secrecy, self-deception, and the…
Recovering Out LoudHow I Relapsed on Steroids and ADHD Meds After 7 Years Sober | Anthony's Addiction Recovery Story
Welcome to al the new listeners! I'm so glad you're here. This is my story in a 20 minute episode, I hope you get something out of it. Relapse doesn’t start…
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I Rolled My Truck Into a Ditch : I Quit Drinking — Then Gambling Took Everything
Today's guest is Logan from New Generation Sobriety. Logan Battled alcoholism and gambling addiction until he went to his first rehab at 17 years old. After…
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I “Should” be Doing Better Sober and in Recovery
Today Allen Kharlip, Clinical Supervisor at Addiction Rehab Toronto and good friend, returns to recovering out loud as we open up about current events. In this…
Recovering Out LoudOvercoming Fear in Sobriety: Tools for Anxiety, Uncertainty & Emotional Sobriety
In today’s episode of Recovering Out Loud, Anthony breaks down one of the biggest challenges in sobriety: the fear of the future. If you struggle with…
Recovering Out LoudCommunity Q&A on Sobriety, Boundaries, and Healing
In this community-driven episode, Anthony dives into the real questions you submitted — from alternative paths to sobriety to emotional boundaries, routines…
Recovering Out LoudWhy Relapse Happens & How to Prevent It — Science-Backed, Real Recovery Experience
Most people think relapse is a single moment — but it’s not. In this video, I break down the three phases of relapse (emotional → mental → physical) and…
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I Had a Wine Uber Guy : The Myth of “Fun” Drinking & the Reality of Sobriety
“We almost died… so we have to talk about it.” This line says everything. This episode is a deep, unfiltered look into addiction, relapse, shame, near-death…
Recovering Out LoudGoing Out Sober in Recovery
Going out sober is one of the hardest early-recovery milestones — but it DOES get easier. In this episode, I share the exact tools, mindset shifts, and sober…
Recovering Out Loud12-Step vs. Non-12-Step vs. Therapy: What Actually Helps in Recovery?
AA? SMART? Refuge? Therapy? Coaching? If you’ve ever tried to get sober and felt overwhelmed by all the recovery options out there, this video breaks…
Recovering Out LoudIs Sobriety Supposed to Feel Boring? (The Truth About Dopamine in Recovery)
Is sobriety supposed to feel boring? Short answer: yeah… sometimes it does. But there’s nothing wrong with you — your brain is literally recalibrating after…
Recovering Out LoudHow to Get and Stay Sober Today : Cravings, Anxiety, Triggers & What to Expect in Early Recovery
Your first 30 days of sobriety can feel confusing, overwhelming, and honestly… scary. In this video, I break down exactly what to expect in early recovery —…
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Big Book Daily Meditation Readings P. 86-88
From the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous Page 86-88 on awakening Follow Us:JOIN ME ON MY SOCIALS - FREE RECOVERY GUIDE AND RECOVERY COACHING…
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Methadone, Suboxone & the Fentanyl Crisis: What Recovery Really Takes
This episode explores opioid addiction, methadone and Suboxone treatment, fentanyl risks, withdrawal, and the emotional toll of relapse. Kate from CATC breaks…
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From Blackouts to Barbells: Rebuilding My Life Through Movement
In this episode of Recovering Out Loud, we dive into a raw and honest conversation about relapse, body language, hidden pain, and the transformation that…
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Work, Stress & Addiction: The Hidden Link Nobody’s Talking About
In this episode of Recovering Out Loud, Anthony sits down with Alexandra Perry, Director of Business Development for Inpatient and Virtual Programs, and former…
Recovering Out LoudPerfectionism, Body Image & Addiction: The Hidden Triggers That Keep Us Sick
In this emotional and deeply relatable episode of Recovering Out Loud, host Anthony sits down with Eryl McCaffrey, a psychotherapist and woman in long-term…
Recovering Out LoudI Relapsed Because I Stopped Doing This
If you’ve ever struggled with addiction, relapse, or finding long-term sobriety, this conversation will inspire you. Host Anthony speaks with Allison, an…
Recovering Out LoudTypes of Addiction Treatment — What Families Should Know
Today i sat down with Melanie Matthews, BSW, MSW, RSW Director of Clinical Programs at Canadian Addiction Treatment Centres Melanie Matthews is a registered…
Recovering Out LoudI Almost Took My Own Life : Postpone the Suicide 24 Hours — and Everything Changed
After decades of drinking, failed restarts, and hitting countless rock bottoms, Tom found himself on the edge — alone in a Toronto condo, terrified and ready…
Recovering Out LoudFrom Cocaine Psychosis to Cooking on Live TV : Chef Devan
I say down with Chef Devan... Driven by his desire and ambition to be the best in the business, Guyanese, Canadian Chef Devan Rajkumar (aka Chef Dev) has no…
Recovering Out LoudFrom Gangs and Guns to Healing : Childhood Abuse to Finding Inner Peace
In this powerful episode of Recovering Out Loud, we explore the raw and unfiltered journey of a man who transformed his life from violence, drugs, and street…
Recovering Out LoudI Was Drunk and Naked in a Hotel Lobby in New York
This is Braydon Lynch's story In this episode, we dive into one of the rawest stories you’ll ever hear about addiction, relapse, and recovery. Our guest shares…
Recovering Out LoudLosing $2.5M & Finding Sobriety | How I Stayed Sober for 3 Years
This powerful episode dives into the raw reality of addiction, relapse, and recovery. Hasan shares his journey from building a business, losing $2.5M, and…
Recovering Out LoudGeneration Women & The Art of Shared Healing
Jennifer Baxendale and Kirstin Rajala were in NYC to attend the February 2020 show. Inspired by the night, and with their shared passion for women’s stories…
Recovering Out LoudAddicts Gone too Soon : The Story of Matthew Perry
Matthew Perry was more than Chandler Bing. In this powerful, 15-minute episode, we go beyond the laugh track to explore his real story — from childhood pain to…
Recovering Out Loud15 Times in the Mental Hospital – Breaking the Cycle of Insanity
“I thought I was the biggest piece of shit walking on God’s green earth.” In this gripping episode of Recovering Out Loud, Anthony sits down with Bo as he…
Recovering Out LoudWeed Was My Higher Power for 25 Years - Patty D
Patrick spent over two decades trapped in daily use, denial, and isolation. From high school parties to bartending life, from weed dependency to cocaine…
Recovering Out Loud12 Days Without Sleep on Drugs… and the Near-Death Experience That Changed Everything
Mikes story is truly inspirational. Mike shares his raw and inspiring journey through addiction, near-death experiences, and the path to recovery. From early…
Recovering Out LoudI Got Caught Smuggling Kilos Across the Boarder In Mexico
After serving four years in prison, Emily O’Brien didn’t just rebuild her life—she built a brand. Comeback Snacks is now in over 1,500 stores, but the story…
Recovering Out LoudI Asked God to Kill Me… Or Save Me - 26 Years Sober and Unfiltered
Mary’s story will shake you — and give you hope.From losing her mother at just four years old, to growing up in an orphanage, and facing childhood trauma and…
Recovering Out LoudThe Untold Truth About Policing, Mental Health, and Accountability
MEET Jeff Wenninger Retired LAPD Lieutenant, Nationally Recognized Law Enforcement Expert, and Founder & CEO of Law Enforcement Consultants, LLC With over 33…
Recovering Out LoudBreaking the Cycle: How Family Addiction Recovery Really Happens
Welcome to another powerful episode of the Recovering Out Loud podcast!In this raw, unfiltered conversation, we dive deep into what it really takes to break…