Shows / Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
I am a Chid & Adolescent Psychotherapist. The podcast are educational and orientated towards parents. We cover a wide range of sometimes, tricky subjects, in the hope of reassuring parents that no matter how hard things may seem, there are things you can do.
Thank you.
Kim
Episodes
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
When No Is Only Today’s Answer
Send us Fan Mail “No” is one of the most loaded words we hear. It can land like a slammed door from a school, a doctor, an employer, or just life, and it’s…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Reclaiming Your Emotional Life
Send us Fan Mail You can be calm one minute and anxious the next, and the scary part is not knowing why. We close out our three-part series on emotional…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Emotional Contamination Explained
Send us Fan Mail You can start a conversation feeling fine, then walk away flooded with shame, anxiety, guilt, or self doubt that wasn’t there five minutes…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Whose Feeling Is This?
Send us Fan Mail You can start the day calm, talk to one person, and end up tense, guilty, or strangely hopeless. That shift is not always “just you.” We dig…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
I can do better than that......
Send us Fan Mail This is just the intro....and verse 1.
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Boy Who Found His Anger
Send us Fan Mail A kid who never raises his voice can look “easy” to the adults around him, but that quiet can be a carefully engineered survival plan. We tell…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Story 1. Episode 2. The Cost Of Untruth
Send us Fan Mail Truth doesn’t usually get shouted in families, it leaks out through consequences. When adults cling to competing stories about who is right…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Truth That Changes Everything
Send us Fan Mail You’ve probably heard the line: “You can’t handle the truth.” We start there and take it seriously, because in real families and real…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Hidden Family Stories Behind Child Behavior
Send us Fan Mail Kids don’t always tell the truth with words. Sometimes they tell it with panic, perfectionism, shutdown, rage, or a level of “acting out” that…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Mentalization Episode 10. How Parents Build A Child Who Can Reflect
Send us Fan Mail If you have ever watched a child melt down and thought, “I don’t even know what’s happening right now,” this finale will give you a different…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
How Curiosity Shuts Down
Send us Fan Mail Curiosity is fragile, and families can lose it without meaning to. Kim Lee from the Children’s Consultancy unpacks the quiet patterns that…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Stop Calling It Attention Seeking And Start Listening
Send us Fan Mail If you have ever caught yourself thinking “They’re doing this on purpose,” this conversation offers a different path: wonder what is happening…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Autism And Mentalization
Send us Fan Mail Most people think the big question about autism is whether autistic children “understand other people.” I’m not convinced that question gets…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Mentalization And ADHD: Why Perspective Disappears Under Stress
Send us Fan Mail A child with ADHD can look incredibly empathic and reasonable, and then suddenly say something harsh, slam a door, or melt down over what…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Social Media Ban Problem
Send us Fan Mail A social media ban for kids under 16 sounds like the kind of clean, decisive fix adults crave when they feel frightened and powerless. I get…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Ep 5. Why Trauma Shuts Down A Child’s Thinking Brain
Send us Fan Mail We talk about what happens when a child’s ability to mentalize collapses under stress, and why anxiety and explosive anger can be signs of a…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Episode 4. How Parents Become A Child’s External Brain
Send us Fan Mail We unpack why children cannot learn emotional regulation alone and how they build it by borrowing calm from a caregiver. We explain…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Ep. 3-The Brain Behind Mentalization
Send us Fan Mail We explore what happens in the brain when we mentalize, and why reflection can disappear the moment emotions surge. We connect child…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Episode 2,How Mentalization Grows
Send us Fan Mail Your child isn’t learning emotional skills from your best lecture. They’re learning from what it feels like when they’re scared, angry, or…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Mentalization In Plain English
Send us Fan Mail A dog cowers when we approach, even though we mean no harm. That moment forces a human question we ask all the time with kids, partners, and…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Recovery After The Empath Avoidant Trap
Send us Fan Mail Recovery gets sold as closure, a perfect apology, or a clean happy ending. I see it differently, and in this finale I name it plainly…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Reckoning
Send us Fan Mail The most misunderstood moment in an empath and avoidant relationship isn’t the breakup. It’s what happens after the empath finally walks away…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Day Hope Ends
Send us Fan Mail The breakup nobody talks about is the quiet one: the day an empath finally leaves after years of trying to make it work. We sit with that…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Empath & The Avoidant. Ep.3. Death By A Thousand Cuts
Send us Fan Mail A relationship can look perfectly fine on the outside while quietly collapsing on the inside. We dig into the empath and avoidant dynamic that…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Avoident & The Empath. Ep.2. Chasing Closeness, Chasing Distance
Send us Fan Mail The hardest relationship pain is rarely a single blowup. It’s the slow confusion of reaching for someone you love and watching them step back…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Empath And The Avoidant<br>
Send us Fan Mail The most confusing relationships often start with the strongest pull: instant closeness, deep recognition, and that feeling that you finally…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
When An Avoidant Meets An Empath
Send us Fan Mail Some relationships don’t look abusive on the outside, but they leave you feeling used, confused, and worn down to the bone. I’m Kim Lee, a…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Episode 5: The Adult Relationships of Attachment — Why We Keep Recreating patterns
Send us Fan Mail Your love life may look like a string of different people, but your nervous system might be chasing the same attachment experience every time…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Psycholgy of Attachment. Compulsive Care Seeking
Send us Fan Mail That restless urge to check your phone, reread a text, or ask “Are we okay?” can feel embarrassing, but it is often a learned attachment…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Episode 3: Compulsive Caregiving — The Child Who Learns to Look After Everyone Else
Send us Fan Mail The “good” kid who helps, soothes, and never complains can look like a dream to teachers and parents, but that shine can hide an attachment…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Beyond Attachment Styles. Ep 2. The Child Who Stops Needing Anyone
Send us Fan Mail The child who never causes problems can be the one carrying the most pain. I’m Kim Lee, a child and adolescent psychotherapist, and I’m…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Hidden Attachment Strategies In Adolescence. Introduction to the series.
Send us Fan Mail If attachment styles are the headlines, adolescence is where the fine print starts running your life. We pick up where the classic four…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Attachment styles. Disorganized Attachment. When Love & Fear Are The Same.
Send us Fan Mail Love shouldn’t feel like a threat, but for people with disorganized attachment, closeness can trigger the same alarm as danger. We walk…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Avoidant Attachment Pattern
Send us Fan Mail You can get used to the noise of a relationship that feels “fine,” until one day the sound changes and you realize you’ve been living around…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Attachment styles. Ep.2. Anxious Attachment
Send us Fan Mail A delayed reply shouldn’t feel like a crisis, yet for many people it can light up the whole nervous system in seconds. I’m unpacking anxious…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
An Introduction To Attachment. Ep.1. Attachment As An Invisible Blueprint
Send us Fan Mail Attachment can start running your life before you can even form a sentence. If you’ve ever felt a sudden spike of panic when someone pulls…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Hold The Line !!
Send us Fan Mail The hardest part of leaving a damaging relationship often isn’t the breakup. It’s the moment your mind starts bargaining for “one last talk,”…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Psychology of Control. Reality Breaks The Spell
Send us Fan Mail Control does not usually show up as a slammed fist on the table. It shows up as confusion you cannot quite name, silence that trains you to…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Psychology of Control. Ep 8. Gaslighting
Send us Fan Mail Someone looks you in the eye and says, “That never happened,” and suddenly you are cross-examining your own memory instead of their behavior…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Psychology of Control. EP 7. How Family Secrets Turn Into Psychological Control
Send us Fan Mail A family secret is not just something nobody says. It can become the emotional architecture of a home, a kind of organized silence that…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Psychology of Control. Family Dynamics Shape A Child’s Personality
Send us Fan Mail A child can look “fine” and still be living in a constant state of emotional calculation. I explore what happens when kids grow up in…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Psychology of control. Episode 5.Guilt As Control
Send us Fan Mail If you’ve ever set a simple boundary and suddenly found yourself defending whether you’re a good person, you already know how powerful guilt…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Psychology of Control. Withdrawal
Send us Fan Mail Silence can feel like a door slamming, even when nobody raises their voice. We’re digging into emotional withdrawal: that unmistakable shift…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Psychology of Control. The Child Is Not The Problem
Send us Fan Mail A teen is getting worse fast: school is collapsing, anger is escalating, and violence is starting to show up at home. It’s tempting to aim…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Psychology of Control. Ambiguity
Send us Fan Mail Clarity is not a luxury in a relationship. When someone keeps you guessing on purpose, the uncertainty becomes the leash. We dig into…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
The Psychology Of Control. Introduction.
Send us Fan Mail Control isn’t always loud. Sometimes it’s a gentle tone, a missing text, a “helpful” correction of what you remember, or a quiet pressure to…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Why it feels like it's happening again. The Story We Tell Ourselves
Send us Fan Mail Silence can be loud. A delayed text, a cooler tone, a missing reply and suddenly your mind is writing a whole script about what it means and…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Episode 3: When Small Changes Feel Like Big Threats. When Silence Hits
Send us Fan Mail A delayed text can feel like rejection. A quieter voice can feel like abandonment. When the rhythm of a relationship shifts by just a…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Why It Feels Like It’s Happening Again. Episode 2.When The Past Feels Present
Send us Fan Mail A delayed text. A different tone. A silence that lasts a beat too long. Sometimes the smallest shift lands like a warning siren, and we can’t…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Podcast Series: Why It Feels Like It’s Happening Again. Episode 1: The Moment Something Shifts
Send us Fan Mail A read receipt, a delayed reply, a slightly different tone, and suddenly your body acts like it already knows how the story ends. I’m Kim Lee…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Hidden Harm And Emotional Neglect
Send us Fan Mail The harm that changes a child most isn’t always loud or dramatic, it can be the quiet absence that nobody knows how to name. We close the…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Hidden Harm. "Good Behaviour" - Or Is it....?
Send us Fan Mail A child who never breaks the rules can look like a parenting success story. But what if that calm, compliant, high-achieving “good behavior”…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Hidden Harm. The Too-Grown-Up Child
Send us Fan Mail The child who “never causes trouble” can be the one carrying the most. I’m talking about the kid adults love to praise as thoughtful…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Hidden Harm, After-School Meltdowns
Send us Fan Mail A teacher says your child is settled, engaged, and doing well. Then you get home and it’s tears, anger, shutdowns, or nonstop conflict. That…
- Inside The Consulting Room - Understanding the Child Behind the Behaviour
Hidden Harm. The Overcompliant Child
Send us Fan Mail The child who never argues can look like a parenting win, but what if that “good behavior” is actually a safety strategy? We dig into hidden…