Shows / Bitch Bible
Bitch Bible
A podcast that dares to say what many are thinking, but only a bitch would say. Expect unfiltered and unapologetic discussions about sex, millennial struggles, pop culture, social faux-pas and hopefully, an insightful takeaway. Nothing is off limits. Hosted by Jackie Schimmel, creator of blog “The Bitch Bible," and your soon-to-be bitchy (and super neurotic) best friend.
Episodes
Bitch BibleMy Unorthodox Asshole
Jackie discusses some aesthetic revisions she would like to make in 2022, discovers her husband's childhood attempts at poetry and goes over some celebrity Tik…
- Bitch Bible
Je Suis Jacquié
Jackie is back on American soil and recaps her girls trip to Paris, gives Kanye West the digital bitch slap he deserves and talks about the time she made out…
- Bitch Bible
Getting Messy with Sarah Hyland
Jackie is joined by actress Sarah Hyland to talk about cocktail psychology, how to twist an argument and thrive as a messy bitch. See Privacy Policy at…
- Bitch Bible
Jewphoria
Jackie sits in the dark and gets lost in the abyss of tone deaf shit on the internet, makes the worst public apology of all time and pitches her new off…
- Bitch Bible
Vag Tingz and Peen Chills
Jackie is joined by friend and fellow podcaster Jared Freid to discuss luxury problems, first date tips and role playing techniques for psychopaths (ehem me)…
- Bitch Bible
Intervention
Jackie falls victime to a family intervention over abusing Advil PM and shares her journey with insomniac recovery. She also praises speech impediments, the…
- Bitch Bible
Be The Best You! JK
Jackie has Enneagram specialist Jorja White on to discuss personality types and how to be the most/ least functional version of yourself. See Privacy Policy at…
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High Highs and Barlows
Jackie recaps Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, Kanye West's breakup plan and why Minnie Mouse should file a class action lawsuit. See Privacy Policy at…
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Dances with Bagels
Jackie discusses cancel culture, the time she blacked out at her grandma's 80th birthday and the joys of hating strangers for absolutely no reason. I dare you…
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Trail of Blood
Jackie kicks off 2022 by having a code red emergency clearing customs, shares her battle with that bitch Omicron, recaps Real Housewives reunion looks and gets…
- Bitch Bible
Daddy Daycare with Alex Cooper Part 2
Jackie is joined by Alex Cooper from "Call Her Daddy" for part 2 where they continue to talk shit about everyone and everything! Bring in the new year with a…
- Bitch Bible
Daddy Daycare with Alex Cooper
Jackie is joined by Alex Cooper from "Call Her Daddy" to talk shit about everyone and everything! Bring in the new year with a slice of narcissism. See Privacy…
- Bitch Bible
I'm Literally So Sorry.
Jackie gets drunk on Christmas and will not be held responsible for the contents of this episode. I don't remember what I talked about. I will make a donation…
- Bitch Bible
Get Off My Ovaries
Jackie eviscerates a girl she went to high school with for shaming her for being kidless in a grocery store and makes a strong case to get Santa Claus…
- Bitch Bible
Long Shame Strategy
This is a great episode, Jackie recaps how King Richard changed her life, the time she got kicked out of a youth sports league for breaking someone's nose and…
- Bitch Bible
Caesar Salad Scissor Sisters
Jackie recaps her thanksgiving festivities, pleas to get the Hough's off of our television screens, discusses why Caesar salads trigger her and experiences…
- Bitch Bible
Grateful and Hateful
Jackie is #grateful this year and recapping her latest funeral, Pete and Kim, the do's and dont's of Thanksgiving and her affinity for cantaloupe jello. You…
- Bitch Bible
Trauma Truffle Butter
Jackie recaps her trip to Nashville and NYC, talks Real Housewives of Salt Lake City and coins a new medical psychology term "trauma truffle butter" to help…
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Potpourri of Negativity!
Jackie goes over a very detailed account of people, places and bizarre things that give her rosacea and make her irrationally angry. She also goes through the…
- Bitch Bible
Leo Forever
Jackie breaks down pop culture happenings, explores her crush on Pete Davidson, talks about her dead mom again and answers listener questions as the cringe…
- Bitch Bible
Sabbatical
Jackie comes back from a vow of silence to enter yet another torrid stream of conscious dissecting Housewives fashion, content creator complex and the…
- Bitch Bible
Giddy Up
Jackie heads to the Kentucky Derby after being bullied on social media and called horse face. She also accidentally gets her husband cancelled, recaps…
- Bitch Bible
Average Fashion Blogger and a Mediocre Podcaster
Jackie practices unlicensed therapy on the legend behind @averagefashionblogger Courtney Parchman! They discuss losing their virginity, their deep history and…
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Goodbye Courtney.
Jackie tries to stay positive during a difficult time in her podcasting career and ultimately decides to take a sabbatical. She also discusses Halloween…
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LIMBITLESS.
Jackie wakes up at 5am on God's Day and develops a new off broadway production that could get Cheryl a Tony award! She also discusses self care, constipation…
- Bitch Bible
Body Fluids
Jackie is back from Sin City and talks about her trip, Met Gala looks, Andrew's latest home renovation mishap and why tears are her body fluid of choice! See…
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Forces of Hate-ure
Jackie shares a secret about her marriage, has a mid recording earthquake. discusses the Hough siblings, the Met Ball, housewives and I literally can't…
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Shana Tova Motherf*ckers
It's the Jewish New Year and true to form, Jackie has no resolutions. We deep dive Real Housewives, go over some dinner party hacks and pay homage to our…
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SEND THE PARAMEDICS AND A PR REP.
Jackie enters a dangerously exposing spiral of reality by playing a song she pitched to Andrew, dissecting Demi Lovato, DONDA, modern feminism and other…
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There Will Be Blood
Jackie does a menstrual art exhibition in France, gives solo travel tips and delights audience with some verbal abuse for her live studio audience aka her…
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Leaving the Cuntry!
It's Jackie's birthday, she has fled the country and left many questionably offensive opinions and hot takes on the mainland. From One Tree Hill, Housewives…
- Bitch Bible
The Worst Episode Ever
Jackie hits rock bottom and resorts to a Vogue inspired 73 question episode that will prolapse your butthole. Apologies to Anna Kendrick and Michael Buble. See…
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Caulk Tease
Jackie endures a cheating scandal, finds love at the Home Depot, seeks justice for Sarah Jessica Parker and makes her own asshole clench with next level…
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Spectrumella
Jackie enters a 48 hour solitary confinement sans cable and internet and explores the intricacies of her fucked up brain. Kanye, Bennifer, bird extinction and…
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Leo Season
Jackie embraces Leo season balls deep with a trip to Mexico, an impromptu astrology guide, contact with her new neighbors and a cheap mascara theory. See…
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ALLEGEDLY
Jackie discusses her new wellness journey for Leo season, makes a bold case in support of Ramona Singer and remind everyone that Tila Tequila is a nazi…
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Life in Limb-o
Jackie discusses her parting gift to the neighborhood, her new house, deep dives Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and answers listener questions! See Privacy…
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Please Send Horse Tranquilizers
Jackie is back restless and guestless and is in the mood to go off the fucking rails. She discusses #freebritney, talks shit about influencer families and her…
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Cue the Human Resources Dept.
Jackie showcases true job security by having a year in review catch-up with Lauryn and Michael Bosstick. They discuss the vow of silence, "cancel culture"…
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Pardon The DocATot.
Jackie and friend Amanda Hirscho from podcast "Not Skinny But Not Fat" do a Emrata deep dive and kibbitz over pop culture bullshit. See Privacy Policy at…
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Cue The Rainbow!
Jackie is back in studio for the first time in a year and a half whilst testing HR policies and prank calling listeners. She gives financial advice (yikes)…
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Nancy Meyers Could Never
Jackie recites new poetry inspired by former neighbor Cheryl, has a driveby exorcism in Camarillo, recaps RHOBH and discusses her impending MOVE. See Privacy…
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MahaLow Point.
Jackie is bacl from hawaii and cloaked in shame. She apologizes for her cringey social media content, breaks down the Bennifer reboot and probably gets herself…
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Wanderlust, Sparkles and Braille Buttholes
Jackie gets her sphincter lasered, creates a fake Instagram for her husband and has the harsh realization that she may never see Cheryl again. See Privacy…
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Bare Minimum with Heather McMahan and Jennifer Aniston!
Jackie is unraveling live from Atlanta amidst a girls trip with friends Heather McMahan and new field producer Jennifer Garner! See Privacy Policy at…
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Golden Shower
Jackie talks about her traumatic golden shower experience, books a trip on the Goop cruiseline and discusses "Kravis" hype and anal sex. See Privacy Policy at…
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Carafe of Tears
Jackie discusses her emotional reprieve techniques, the peaches makeup challenge, Real Housewives Allstars and the time she got bamboozled into buying a…
- Bitch Bible
The Big Unchill
Jackie discusses Colton Underwood and the "poophole loophole", wine tasting, lots of other things she can't really remember and why Demi Lovato should stick to…
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$6.66
Jackie gets baptized after a demonic bowl of poke, discussed the highly anticipated sequel to "Frankly, Anne" and offers free public relation guidance to…
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Mind. Body. No Soul.
Jackie discusses her new podcast venture, her demon possession, self defense tactics and her emotional experience with Billie Eillish. See Privacy Policy at…
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"Do Better."
Jackie recaps Passover, inconsistencies with celebrities and their social issues and her journey with health and wellness. See Privacy Policy at…
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Oral High Ground
Jackie has a dental emergency, explores her toxic relationship with Costco, gives Emrata some words of discouragement and probably gets disinvited from future…
- Bitch Bible
Me Against The Music
Jackie deals with her Grammy nomination snub, why some funerals feel like low budge Coachella and delights with some new poetry she penned after a few…
- Bitch Bible
Psycho For Sport!
Jackie has a tryst with John Mayer, talks Megan and Harry and recaps some of her psychotic behavior all in the spirit of International Women's Day! See Privacy…
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Live From the Dead Carpet.
Jackie becomes unglued while watching red carpet coverage, teaches you how to make a roast chicken and slaps an innocent samaritan at a local strip mall. See…
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Call Me Brenda.
Jackie has awkward run in with new neighbor who thinks her name is Brenda, tries to summon Lucifer to haunt her future home and pays homage to Heather Gay…
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Bitching in Hell
Jackie is joined by Hannah Berner to discuss a myriad of things that will ultimately get them the presidential suite whilst burning in the depths of hell. See…
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6 FUCKING YEARS.
Jackie reminisces on her 6 year anniversary of the podcast and tells the fucked up slash dark "fairytale" of how it all began. See Privacy Policy at…
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Excusez Moi!
Jackie talks about bringing Grandma Gloria to "Paris" and how she nearly died over steak frites, why Andrew and her almost divorced and what to do when you…
- Bitch Bible
"C*nts Are The New Bitches"
Jackie chats with best friend Max about the evolution of the bitch, breaks down ZERO celebrity gossip (boring) and talks about her disdain for sports. See…