Shows / ask a sub
ask a sub
Ask a Sub is an advice podcast for the kink-curious to take themselves from dreaming to doing. Our host Lina Dune is bringing wellness kink to the masses, and equipping every would-be kinkster with the tools to become their own BDSM BFF.
Episodes
- ask a sub
125. The Clown Serenity Prayer with Gutter the Mod
What do online privacy, sex work decrim, fire butt pix, and clowns have in common? Well they're all special interests of our Deep Dive guest this month —…
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124. Do You Have To Bring Your 35-Year-Old Boyfriend To The Olive Garden?
Should we keep our friendships separate from our D/s dynamics? Should we merge all our relationships, friendships, and situationships into the world's largest…
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123. The ENM Jealousy Thrill Ride
ISN'T BEING AN OPEN-HEARTED AND EVOLVED HUMAN SO FUN??? HAHA Well this week we're talking about what to do when your partner is in love, not forcing yourself…
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122. With Pride this June We Take it Up the Butt 🫡
The first brick at Stonewall. The repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell". Obergefell v. Hodges. What better way to commemorate these extremely profound and…
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121. Quick Hits: On The Mic In A Ball Gag
How do we advocate for our desires the same way we advocate for our limits? How do we see ourselves as valid even if we're bedroom-only? How can a safe word be…
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120. When Threesome Fantasies Become Threesome Icks
A caller wants to know what to do when a threesome fantasy about a friend becomes a sudden turn-off. Lina does some Ick Forensics™️ on what could be bothering…
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119. Should Doms sub? Should subs Dom? Should chaos reign supreme?
Today Lina answers one of life's age old questions, one that's debated frequently in a public forum much like the God question or origins of the universe —…
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118. Sydney Baloue Is A Daddy Enthusiast
Sydney Baloue is a writer, performer, event producer and advocate for racial, social, and gender justice, LGBTQ+ rights, and for trans-masculine visibility in…
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117. Break Glass for Instant 24/7 Starter Kit
A long-married caller wants to know how to jumpstart a 24/7 dynamic with a partner who may have some reservations. Lina validates that your 24/7 dynamic is…
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116. Escaping Neurospicy Perfectionism
Ok so I've brought you into my basement, tied you to a chair, fixed a single lightbulb on you, put my spiky boot between your legs, leaned in real close, and…
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115. Quick Hits: Vetting Q's & Power Struggles
In this new monthly series Lina is answering quick text-based q's from paid members and bringing them to the public feed! This month we're talking about…
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114. Kink In The Tarot with Michelle Tea
Activist and writer Michelle Tea joined me this month to vulnerably discuss the places magic intersects with lineage, life, and sex. We transitioned into a bit…
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113. Licking Your Wounds (Figurative …Unless?)
A caller wants to know how to repair their relationship with their mind and body after a breakup. Lina's take? Don't let your drive to be considerate and…
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112. Scaring Your Partner's Pants Off
Craving a broad introduction to fear play? I bet you are you sick freak!! In this lesson, I mean episode, Lina talks about the classics of fear play: knives…
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111. Hot and Unbothered with Yana Tallon-Hicks
Sex therapist and author Yana Tallon-Hicks dropped by to share some practical sex advice, thoughts on neurodivergence and kink, and lay down some beautiful…
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110. A Fire Under Every Butt!
Introducing my campaign slogan — let's get a fire under every would-be Dom's butt! You can't light the fire, but you can toss some kindling on the sucker and…
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109. Communicating With Your Butt aka The Hanky Code
Communication is hard! Ever wanted to do it non-verbally with your butt? Enter: the hanky code. Today we're talking about its origins in queer cruising culture…
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108. Porn Addiction Is Not Real with Erica Smith
Erica Smith helps Purity Culture dropouts rebuild their sexual ethic after escaping restrictive religions, and this week she's helping all of us deal with the…
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107. Trust Your Sub Swoons
A listener calls in wondering how in god's name to deal with having a CRUSH on a CIS MAN?!? (Valid). Lina gives an answer about trusting your body and not…
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106. Calling All Beleaguered Subs
This week we've got a HUGE announcement and a call from a sub who sounds frickin' exhausted. Who isn't?? Lina reminds everybody about how submission begins at…
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105. Cupid Likes It Up The Ass
Lina shares a million thoughts on anal sex from a sub's perspective including sweet meditations on the butt's position as a metaphor for the liminal space…
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104. Protocol Brain Dump
A sub in an M/s dynamic calls in wondering how to integrate more long distance service into their dynamic and Lina nerds out on protocol in great detail. A…
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103. Let's Talk About Latex!
Calling all rubber buggy baby kinksters… let's take a hard 180 away from the doomscroll and talk about the surprising history of the latex kink. From fashion…
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102. When Is Romance A Limit?
A listener calls in feeling big feelings about a new Dom, and Lina talks about making the most of the safe havens we find along the road to our dream…
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101. Tough Love For People Pleasers
Hey!! Hey you!! Stop worrying about upsetting people with your very reasonable needs and requests! In today's episode, a caller worries that their Dom is upset…
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100. Abolish The Family with Sophie Lewis & An Erotica Surprise
No family?! Community kitchens?! Mandatory orgies?! Less social isolation?! This is the future the left wants, and Lina is forcing it down your throat this…
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99. Fear Is Good, Actually
This Christmas, fear isn't just for the ballot box. That's right, a caller wants to know how to negotiate with fear around kinks, edges, and, the scariest…
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98. Queer Pill Your Holidays
A caller wants to know if straight people are ruining kink, and Lina gets into the history of gentrification in the kink world and how well-meaning straights…
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97. Debuting Your Kinks: A Formula
Ever wondered how to drop the news of some of your less mainstream kinks in a relationship? You know… the really head-turning ones that would shock polite…
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96. Age Gap Autumn
Gather 'round to hear the debauched tales of connection, mutual support, and hot sex contained in the ever problematic social media boogeyman… the Age Gap…
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95. The World Needs Male Subs
Looootttttaaaaaa feelings about gender this week, huh folks? We're discussing the "gender wars," how you can assist in the political apocalypse, and how to…
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94. Feral Raccoon Hour with the AAS Moderators
Come one, come all, to the wholesome dumpster we raccoons cluster in also known as the Ask A Sub discord community. The community is a benefit of patreon and…
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93. Kink for Survivors
A caller wants to know how to use their kinky toolkit to address a recently resurfaced memory of past trauma, and Lina gets into how kink, while not a panacea…
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92. The Spiky Wartenberg Wheel Of Emotions
C'mon guys, a tale as old as time. We've all been there - your Dom is seeing other subs, and your jealousy and the Social Media Demon have twisted the…
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91. Getting Left Hanging (Not In The Fun Way)
A sub calls in wondering what to do when you've been in multiple relationships where the kink slowly vanishes over time. Are you going crazy?? No, this is a…
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90. Switch for Switch Poly Parenting with Evolving Love Project
You guys — we did it — we trapped a true switch for switch poly couple with our big butterfly net and dove deep into their deeply respectful and inspiring…
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89. Sub On The Street: Folsom Street Fair
Get your spot in the Conscious Kink 2 Incubator and learn more about it here. Registration ends 9/27 at 11:59pm pacific. Get more Folsom info from this…
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88. Getting Off Hold
We've all been there — an on again, off again dynamic that keeps us trapped in a cycle where we feel that person is the one who can unlock the sex life we…
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87. Rebuilding Your Dynamic After De-escalation
More and more D/s couples are having to put their dynamics on pause lately, and we want to give you the tools to find your way back to each other. This week…
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86. Fewer Bisexual Fucks to Give
We talk a lot on this podcast about feeling "queer enough," and a straight passing queer couple wonders how to feel more at home in queer spaces. Lina affirms…
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85. Safety is Hardcore with Tina Horn
Writer, educatrix, and all around kink community badass Tina Horn joined us to talk all about hardcore kinks and fetishes and how we sort kinks into this…
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84. Divine Masculine & Feminine Energies are Sus
GENDER!! Ever hear of it?! Lina's popping off on the presidential election, right-wing weird shit, and the subtle leak of conspirituality-adjacent terms like…
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83. Chronically Kinky
In a transmission from God's hot car, Lina discusses the relationship between kink and chronic pain, and advises a Spoonie who's playing with a doctor to enjoy…
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82. Fake Dom 2.0
We all know about Fake Doms, people on dating apps who co-opt the language of BDSM to push a misogynistic agenda, but what about when the messaging of…
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81. Subby Future Tripping
Why are subs and kinky people so prone to tripping out on what the future could be? Well, as the saying goes, subs plan and Doms laugh at our anticipatory…
- ask a sub
80. Getting The Switch Itch
Dogs and cats, living together, mass hysteria! When can a sub be a Dom? A caller wants to know when their Dommy tendencies qualify them to start switchin', and…
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79. Making it Weird While Keeping it Secure with Casey Tanner aka @queersextherapy
In this preview of Deep Dive, Lina chats with Casey Tanner, @queersextherapy, about their new book Feel It All. Topics covered include defining secure…
- ask a sub
78. Outgrowing Your Fish Tank
What happens when you're criss crossing all your red string a la Charlie Day while researching D/s to broaden the scope of your dynamic, but your Dom just…
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77. An AMA with Lina
This month for pride, join your very own fave bisexual goblin for a wide ranging AMA! That's right, I answered your q's in real time just like the old days…
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76. D/s Is A Love Language
This week, a married couple struggles with the ways D/s sometimes outwardly looks like the oppressive gender roles they were raised with, and have been…
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75. Your Brain Is A Soft-Boiled Egg
Lina gives some tender yet protective advice to a 20-year-old sub looking to start their kink journey. To support the pod and join our thriving ask a sub…
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74. Eating Olives Off the Floor with Novelist R.O. Kwon
R.O. Kwon stopped by the pod this week to talk about her new book Exhibit, a tale about kink, queerness, and what happens when people pursue that which they…
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73. Zero Sum Cats with Dollie the Discord Mod
Our Deep Dive guest this month is many things — a kink/rope organizer, an amazing friend, a top-tier emoji-reactor, and a Ask A Sub discord moderator that has…
- ask a sub
72. The Subby Art of Letting Go
A sub calls in wondering how to "do" submission right, and Lina shares some wisdom about how to avoid submissive doing and embrace submissive being. To support…
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71. Age Play with Baby Linh
Age Play is considered by some to be one of the most taboo kinks out there, but what if it was just cute inner child work? Age play creator Baby Linh joins me…
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70. Spit It Out with Alison Stevenson
Today's episode is brought to you by our friends at Feeld, the dating app for the curious! The theme of the day is spitting it out - from feelings to actual…
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69. Cucking Aftercare
That's me in the corner… that's me in the… somewhat challenging aftercare predicament? A listener calls in about how to engineer proper aftercare in a cucking…
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68. Everybody Needs To Chill with Bae Leche
Bae Leche dropped by the pod to talk about being a non-monogamous mom, dating while pregnant, and new corners of her sexuality she's discovering in the midst…
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67. The Submissive Awakening
Kink arrives in your life looking like a problem, but it's really a solution. In this episode, Lina leads a listener through the daunting moment of taking…
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66. Public Humiliation - Where's The Line?
A listener asks the age-old question of where the line is with public humiliation kinks and involving bystanders, and Lina dives in with things to consider…