Latest / LIFE Podcast with Dr. C / Calming Your Inner Storm with Mindfulness

Transcript

Calming Your Inner Storm with Mindfulness · LIFE Podcast with Dr. C

• 0:06
  Dr C: Hola and welcome to the live podcast where we explore how to learn, stay inspired, continue to purge, and evolve into our best most competitive selves.
• 0:16
  Dr C: I'm your host, Dr.
• 0:18
  Dr C: C, and today we're talking about emotional wellness.
• 0:21
  Dr C: Have you ever felt completely overwhelmed by your own emotions?
• 0:27
  Dr C: I have.
• 0:28
  Dr C: Like a storm came in and just took over your inner world, leaving you feeling tossed around with waves of anxiety, frustration, even sadness.
• 0:40
  Dr C: If you have, you are in the right place.
• 0:43
  Dr C: Because today's episode is going to talk about moving beyond the idea of just calming down and into the practical, powerful world of minds.
• 0:56
  Dr C: I was so excited during the recording of this episode because it really helped me learn more about how to ground myself in moments where I'm in the trick, in moments where my anxiety is getting the best of me.
• 1:12
  Dr C: And you are going to love hearing from our guests.
• 1:18
  Dr C: So in this episode, our guest is Nina Shevin Stepperson.
• 1:22
  Dr C: Nina specializes in EMDR, internal family systems, and mindfulness-informed care, helping people calm anxiety, heal from trauma, and develop grounded emotional habits.
• 1:35
  Dr C: She also leads at Liberty Mindfulness, a platform on YouTube offering simple, powerful mental health skills.
• 1:44
  Dr C: This is an episode you will not want to miss.
• 1:47
  Dr C: Nina, welcome to the live podcast.
• 1:51
  Dr C: Thank you so much for having me.
• 1:54
  Dr C: So excited that you're here with us today.
• 1:57
  Dr C: So let's start with the basics, right?
• 1:59
  Dr C: Because mindfulness is a word that we hear a lot.
• 2:02
  Dr C: From your perspective, what does it truly mean?
• 2:07
  Nina: So for me, mindfulness means being present with what is without trying to fix, fight, or flee from it.
• 2:19
  Nina: It's learning to become the observer of your inner world rather than being lost inside of it.
• 2:29
  Nina: And I often tell my clients, you're not your thoughts, you're the awareness behind the thoughts.
• 2:36
  Nina: And that shift allows us to respond to life instead of reacting to it.
• 2:45
  Nina: And this is just a little example that I use in session with session when I'm trying to explain it.
• 2:52
  Nina: And I like this for perspective, right?
• 2:56
  Nina: So imagine yourself like you're in a bubble.
• 3:00
  Nina: And in this bubble, it's like your bubble of peace, let's call it, right?
• 3:06
  Nina: And it's just like calm inside there.
• 3:11
  Nina: It's it's just relaxing, and you're really safe in that bubble.
• 3:16
  Nina: But as you look around, there's chaos, there's this stressful situation, and this triggering person, and this person giving you a list of things you need to do, and the kids running around screaming, and everyone wanting from you.
• 3:35
  Nina: Okay.
• 3:36
  Nina: And then you're inside the bubble, you're observing all of this, but you aren't swirling around.
• 3:45
  Nina: You're you're like at peace, and you can empath empathize with people, and you can hold space with people or people without like owning and absorbing all the emotion that comes with the chaos.
• 4:06
  Dr C: Oh, yes.
• 4:08
  Dr C: I feel like you're talking to me.
• 4:10
  Dr C: Absolutely.
• 4:14
  Dr C: And so for those of us who feel that chaos, can you pull back the court curtain and like what is actually happening in our minds and our bodies?
• 4:25
  Nina: Okay.
• 4:26
  Nina: So when the chaos hits, it's basically the anxiety, typically, right?
• 4:35
  Nina: And your body then goes into like the survival mode.
• 4:38
  Nina: So your heart starts racing, you breathing becomes really shallow, your mind starts spinning, all sorts of stories of threat, right?
• 4:48
  Nina: You start to catastrophize, you start to make up stories.
• 4:52
  Nina: And one of the things I teach in with clients is we fall into these thought traps, right?
• 5:01
  Nina: Or another term is cognitive distortion.
• 5:04
  Nina: You start to see the world through the lens of those thought traps, right?
• 5:10
  Nina: So mindfulness like helps to regulate your nervous system.
• 5:16
  Nina: So when all that is going on and the chaos starts, being mindful helps you just bring it down.
• 5:24
  Nina: Okay.
• 5:25
  Nina: And just by slowing your breath and grounding in the present, you send that signal to the body that you're safe, that all this stuff that you're creating is not real.
• 5:37
  Nina: What is happening in the present is what is actually real, what is actual reality.
• 5:48
  Nina: Right?
• 5:49
  Nina: So it's not like forcing calm, it's like creating conditions where the calm can return naturally.
• 5:58
  Nina: That makes sense.
• 6:00
  Nina: That makes sense.
• 6:01
  Dr C: Absolutely.
• 6:02
  Dr C: That's such a clear way of putting it.
• 6:04
  Dr C: I've never heard mindfulness put that way.
• 6:07
  Dr C: So thank you.
• 6:07
  Dr C: Because it grounds me and it helps me understand.
• 6:10
  Dr C: We hear we hear a lot of words, right?
• 6:13
  Dr C: And we don't necessarily know what it means, how it impacts us, and how we how we naturally respond without intention.
• 6:21
  Dr C: But when we put intention into really kind of understanding our emotions, you know, that is to me where we could really like start thinking about our wellness in a different way, right?
• 6:33
  Dr C: So I know this work is deeply personal for you.
• 6:37
  Dr C: And your YouTube channel, I know it wasn't a business plan, you described it as a calling, as your way of giving back, chart work as you called it.
• 6:47
  Dr C: Can you share the inspiration behind that?
• 6:51
  Nina: Yes.
• 6:51
  Nina: During my sessions, I found myself like teaching very like the same grounding tools, the same breath work, the same visualizations.
• 7:15
  Nina: And I I started almost like a little toolkit, but I start when I have a new client.
• 7:21
  Nina: I start with this toolkit because none, none of these, none of I've been in practice for many, many years.
• 7:29
  Nina: And no one has these tools.
• 7:33
  Nina: It's so foreign to people, right?
• 7:36
  Nina: And you know, and it's something that I can always like refer back to.
• 7:41
  Nina: But what clients would always say is, you know, I wish, I wish I could take you home with me.
• 7:47
  Nina: Or they'd say, you know, I heard your voice in my head reminding me to be mindful.
• 7:52
  Nina: The only time I've heard, I heard your voice in my head.
• 7:56
  Nina: So around that same, around the same time, I felt like this nudge, honestly, I felt it was God saying, share what you have, right?
• 8:05
  Nina: And I didn't listen because life started laughing and I put it on hold, and my own, you know, my own stuff comes up.
• 8:14
  Nina: And then I felt like God started screaming it.
• 8:19
  Nina: And um, you know, it became like every session with a new client, they would say like the same thing.
• 8:27
  Nina: And they talk about how impactful it was to learn this skill.
• 8:31
  Nina: And and, you know, it's just not something we typically learn growing up.
• 8:36
  Nina: We we exist in the future.
• 8:39
  Nina: A lot of people, I won't say we, a lot of people exist in the future or the past.
• 8:46
  Dr C: Wow.
• 8:46
  Nina: And they don't know how to exist in the present.
• 8:49
  Nina: Wow.
• 8:50
  Nina: And when you exist in the present, you can't be anxious because usually you're anxious about something in the future, right?
• 9:00
  Nina: So if you exist in the moment and allow yourself to learn that, your whole life can be impacted.
• 9:10
  Nina: And so, like, we weren't taught that.
• 9:14
  Nina: Like, we we grew up with the hustle bustle and the always moving parts, and that is what you look at as success is how many things you can juggle, you know, and that's not healthy, right?
• 9:29
  Dr C: And and I love how you put it, uh, you know, we're either living in the past or we're living in the future.
• 9:34
  Dr C: Very rarely are we living in the present.
• 9:36
  Dr C: That that that really hit home because I'm sitting here going, yes, that is so true.
• 9:44
  Dr C: I'm always thinking about what's next.
• 9:47
  Dr C: I'm always thinking about okay, what's on my calendar?
• 9:49
  Dr C: What do I have to do?
• 9:50
  Dr C: What is the deadline?
• 9:51
  Dr C: What's the report?
• 9:52
  Dr C: What's you know, meeting, whatever it is.
• 9:54
  Dr C: Always thinking in the future.
• 9:57
  Dr C: Wow.
• 9:58
  Dr C: And and how much am I missing?
• 10:01
  Dr C: Because I'm not in the present.
• 10:03
  Dr C: Absolutely.
• 10:05
  Nina: Absolutely.
• 10:05
  Nina: Can you even enjoy the things that you are working for, right?
• 10:10
  Nina: Because if you were always thinking of the long list, can you enjoy just the moment, you know?
• 10:17
  Nina: And so, like part of going out on this limb and starting this YouTube channel was like not for business, not for like another like a side hustle, but it was kind of an offering.
• 10:32
  Nina: It's my way of putting calm into the world because in the way the world is right now, I you know, I feel so helpless and I can only do so much one client at a time to help, you know.
• 10:45
  Nina: And for some people, therapy is a luxury.
• 10:49
  Nina: It's not there's still the stigma attached, but for some people, they just can't afford it, right?
• 10:56
  Nina: So this is like a tool that I can anybody can access.
• 11:02
  Nina: And for that moment, for that too, and I do it short because you know, I think it's hard for people that are new to this practice to sit for 10 minutes, sit for 20 minutes, you know.
• 11:14
  Nina: And so I do them, make them short to just get you used to actually being still.
• 11:20
  Nina: You would be shocked at, you know, I have a client that's never done this before and they'll sit for two minutes and it feels like forever.
• 11:29
  Nina: Forever.
• 11:30
  Nina: No, right.
• 11:31
  Nina: I'm not used to that.
• 11:33
  Nina: So, like you and make them short so that it can get you into get people into the practice.
• 11:41
  Dr C: Yeah.
• 11:42
  Dr C: And that's what I was thinking, you know, it may be short, but it's like building a muscle, right?
• 11:47
  Dr C: When you work out a day, so building that muscle.
• 11:50
  Dr C: So I'd love that it's short because you know, you can take time to kind of start getting used to it and really learn the skills.
• 11:57
  Dr C: So I have been on your YouTube page and very helpful.
• 12:01
  Dr C: I have actually used some of your breath work.
• 12:04
  Dr C: So thank you for that.
• 12:06
  Dr C: And so very excited to continue to learn how to be how to have these techniques, right?
• 12:11
  Dr C: And build my muscle, build, build my my inner, inner uh resilience and really I want to be in the present.
• 12:20
  Dr C: I don't want to look back and go, wow, I spent so much time worrying about what happened or what's gonna happen that I didn't enjoy the present.
• 12:27
  Dr C: So I definitely uh I'm thankful that we're having this conversation because it reinforces the benefits and also reinforces that the only way to get good at it and comfortable with it is by doing it.
• 12:41
  Nina: Over and over again.
• 12:41
  Nina: Yeah, and truthfully, once you start and you get used to it and it starts to feel good and you start to like be able to carry that with you beyond the two minutes or three minutes or five minutes, and you can walk around and be in your bubble, the sense of peace that comes with that.
• 13:01
  Nina: Yes, yeah, but yes, it's a muscle, it's rewiring your brain, you know.
• 13:08
  Dr C: And you and you said it, right?
• 13:09
  Dr C: We weren't raised this way, right?
• 13:11
  Dr C: It wasn't some, it's not something you learn at school, it's not something you learn at home.
• 13:16
  Dr C: You learn it if you're in therapy, right?
• 13:19
  Dr C: And so, or if you just happen to stumble upon it and and and learn it that way.
• 13:24
  Dr C: So I appreciate I appreciate you talking about this and and transparently speaking about why you created the YouTube channel because you're right, not everyone can afford therapy.
• 13:36
  Dr C: And there's also a a shortage, right?
• 13:39
  Dr C: It's sometimes it takes very long to get into therapy or to find a therapist that speaks your language, understands your culture.
• 13:46
  Dr C: I mean, there's so much that you want to feel comfortable when you when you have therapy, and so there's a lot of factors that go into choosing a therapist.
• 13:55
  Dr C: Yeah, awesome.
• 13:57
  Nina: Thank you for thank you for bringing that up because that is something that I love to share because not everybody um thinks about that.
• 14:05
  Nina: And the therapeutic relationship is really, really important.
• 14:09
  Nina: And for those that go to therapy and they're like, oh, therapy is not working.
• 14:13
  Nina: Oh, I didn't, you know, I didn't feel like I got anything from it.
• 14:16
  Nina: I really think it's you just didn't find the right person that you connected with.
• 14:20
  Dr C: Yeah.
• 14:21
  Dr C: You know, I think about therapy as dating, right?
• 14:24
  Dr C: Any any relationship, whether it's a friendship, a a romantic uh relationship, uh a family member, a real, but it's still a relationship.
• 14:32
  Dr C: And so find your home, right?
• 14:34
  Dr C: Find where you're comfortable.
• 14:36
  Dr C: And you know, you're gonna it only works if you could feel safe and you could be transparent about what you're really going through.
• 14:44
  Dr C: So yeah, I I agree.
• 14:46
  Dr C: I think it's it's okay to say it doesn't, it's this one's not working, but don't give up and keep looking up and find find your home.
• 14:54
  Dr C: Absolutely, absolutely.
• 14:57
  Nina: And a lot of therapists do um consults, they just do like 15-minute free consults that you could just interview them.
• 15:05
  Nina: Like I've had many clients interview me and I kind of interview them because sometimes for the therapists, you might not be a good fit for them, you know, and they can recognize that.
• 15:16
  Nina: So that that is something that you know to keep in mind.
• 15:23
  Dr C: I've never heard of that concept that a therapist would say you're not the right fit client for me.
• 15:30
  Nina: Oh, yeah, absolutely.
• 15:31
  Nina: A hundred percent and and and a good therapist should, because if it's a situation that either the therapist is not and have does not have expertise in, or it's a situation that's close to them, like if there is trauma that is not resolved or that therapist is working on that, you know, and you're with a client, there's a lot of transference and counter-transference issues that can occur, especially if that therapist is not in her own in their own supervision.
• 16:06
  Nina: So that's something we're trained to look at.
• 16:13
  Nina: You know, if that client is not a good fit, it's okay.
• 16:18
  Nina: It's not rejecting the client, it's giving them referrals to therapists that will better suit their needs because that's the most important thing.
• 16:27
  Nina: You want the client to be able to benefit, and they're not gonna benefit if the therapist is working on their own stuff through the client.
• 16:37
  Dr C: Yeah, yeah.
• 16:38
  Dr C: Well, but thank you for that because you know, I had never really thought about interviewing a therapist, right?
• 16:45
  Dr C: And then interviewing you.
• 16:46
  Dr C: So that gives us agency, it gives us uh autonomy and control and really designing and kind of really thinking about who is who is the best match, right?
• 16:57
  Dr C: And and making sure that it it really is when you when you when you meet with them for the consult.
• 17:02
  Dr C: So that's that's amazing information.
• 17:04
  Dr C: Thank you for that.
• 17:05
  Dr C: So Nina, let's get practical.
• 17:08
  Dr C: Let's really uh let's start thinking about.
• 17:10
  Dr C: So if someone is listening right now, right?
• 17:12
  Dr C: Maybe their heart is racing, their mind is spinning, they need to flourish, not just evolve, not just sorry, not just survive.
• 17:20
  Dr C: Um can you walk us through a simple immediate practice that we can use and where we can find our center?
• 17:28
  Nina: Sure.
• 17:29
  Nina: I I have a couple.
• 17:30
  Nina: Is that okay if I do sure?
• 17:32
  Nina: Let's let's start with one.
• 17:33
  Nina: These are very basic the building blocks, I would say, right?
• 17:38
  Nina: Preschool.
• 17:41
  Nina: So so the first thing is deep breathing.
• 17:49
  Nina: And you know, for for people that are familiar with even the word mild mindfulness, they they're past preschool, right?
• 18:00
  Nina: They're further along, but there's a lot of people that aren't.
• 18:03
  Nina: And for those that aren't, I think that it would be beneficial to just talk about that.
• 18:08
  Nina: Okay.
• 18:08
  Nina: Lots of folks walk around and they don't know how to debreathe.
• 18:14
  Nina: Right.
• 18:15
  Nina: And you say breathe, and they're like, what does that do?
• 18:22
  Nina: That sends your body into flight or fight mode because you're then short on oxygen when you're doing that.
• 18:29
  Nina: You know, you're hyperventilating.
• 18:31
  Nina: You're instead of calming you down, that's like sending you up, you know, up the hill of emotions and and fear, you know.
• 18:41
  Nina: So we want to slow it all the way down.
• 18:46
  Nina: Okay.
• 18:47
  Nina: And we could do this together.
• 18:50
  Nina: So it helps if you put your your hand on your belly because you want your when you breathe in, you want your belly to go out like a balloon.
• 18:59
  Nina: Okay.
• 19:00
  Nina: So as you're breathing in, you want to take a long, slow, deep breath through your nose, out through your mouth.
• 19:08
  Nina: Okay.
• 19:08
  Nina: So if it feels safe, you can close your eyes.
• 19:26
  Nina: And then you take another deep breath in through your nose.
• 19:34
  Nina: And exhale slowly through your mouth.
• 19:37
  Nina: On the next breath, I want you to just soften your shoulders, unclench your jaw, just kind of relax your body.
• 19:52
  Nina: And I want you to then breathe in again.
• 19:56
  Nina: Slow deep breath.
• 19:59
  Nina: And then breathe out.
• 20:10
  Nina: And then we'll do one last time where you inhale, but you kind of visualize that you're inhaling calmness.
• 20:18
  Nina: And you're just exhaling tension.
• 20:25
  Nina: How did that feel?
• 20:36
  Dr C: I closed my eyes.
• 20:38
  Dr C: At first, I was just breathing with my eyes open.
• 20:42
  Dr C: But when I closed my eyes, I felt I was grounded in the breath.
• 20:49
  Dr C: And having my hand on my belly helped me control that breath.
• 20:55
  Dr C: You're right.
• 20:56
  Dr C: I don't extend my belly when I breathe in.
• 21:00
  Dr C: So I have to think about it when I'm doing it.
• 21:05
  Dr C: So yeah, having my hand on my belly definitely helped me, like, oh, that's right.
• 21:09
  Dr C: I'm not breathing deeply, but definitely closing my eyes helped me feel calmer, helped me feel like I was in control.
• 21:15
  Dr C: And it kind of shuts out the world.
• 21:18
  Dr C: Yeah, yes.
• 21:19
  Dr C: It felt like I was, it was just me.
• 21:20
  Dr C: Yes.
• 21:21
  Dr C: Yeah.
• 21:21
  Nina: Yeah.
• 21:21
  Nina: And so, like, even just three conscious breaths, right, can help to like reset your nervous system when you're starting to.
• 21:31
  Nina: I give the analogy to clients about going up a hill, right?
• 21:37
  Nina: And it's like your the engine is revving.
• 21:40
  Nina: So you have a situation happen that is painful or triggering or anxiety-provoking, and you start to creep up the hill, right?
• 21:50
  Nina: And another thing happens, you creep up the hill and nothing happens.
• 21:53
  Nina: You creep up the hill, right?
• 21:54
  Nina: If you're able to just take these three breaths, you start to go down the hill.
• 21:59
  Nina: You know, before you reach the top, we wanna we wanna bring it down.
• 22:04
  Nina: Okay.
• 22:05
  Nina: Yes.
• 22:06
  Nina: All right.
• 22:08
  Nina: So another one.
• 22:11
  unknown: Okay.
• 22:12
  Nina: And so this one is good for let's say you're at the top of the hill.
• 22:16
  Dr C: All right, so I'm already, I'm already really upset.
• 22:19
  Nina: So you're really upset.
• 22:20
  Nina: You're just okay.
• 22:21
  Dr C: You're this is the one I need.
• 22:23
  Dr C: I'm building my muscle.
• 22:26
  Dr C: Okay, so this is the one I need to start with.
• 22:29
  Dr C: Let's go.
• 22:31
  Nina: So this one is a grounding exercise, and this is a really simple grounding exercise, and probably pretty common.
• 22:37
  Nina: A lot of people have used this one, and it's the five senses.
• 22:41
  Nina: Have you heard of that one?
• 22:43
  Nina: No, no.
• 22:44
  Nina: So, so with the five senses, this grounds you in present.
• 22:50
  Nina: So you're really upset about something, you're up that hill, and you could do this right now.
• 22:55
  Dr C: Okay.
• 22:56
  Nina: Name five things that you can see.
• 23:00
  Dr C: Okay, my computer, my TV, the window, a hat that says Puerto Rico on it.
• 23:09
  Dr C: That's three things a microphone, a USC banner, and a bunch of Zeta Phi Beta sorority incorporated uh things.
• 23:21
  Dr C: I had to throw that one in.
• 23:25
  Dr C: Of course, yes.
• 23:30
  Nina: Now, name four things you can touch.
• 23:34
  Dr C: Okay, I could touch the microphone, I could touch my headphones, I could touch the computer, and I could touch my keyboard.
• 23:41
  Dr C: Okay.
• 23:42
  Dr C: And three things you can hear.
• 23:45
  Dr C: I can hear you.
• 23:48
  Dr C: I can hear like just the sound, the ambient sound of the room.
• 23:53
  Dr C: And I don't have my fan on because I'm not having a half flash on.
• 23:59
  Dr C: So I don't hear my fan, which I always hear.
• 24:02
  Nina: Every time I see one of those little fans, I think of me, right?
• 24:06
  Nina: Okay, and then we go to two things you can smell.
• 24:15
  Dr C: So this is gonna be interesting.
• 24:16
  Dr C: I'm gonna tell you why.
• 24:17
  Dr C: I lost my smell in 22 when I had COVID.
• 24:20
  Dr C: Oh so very rarely do I smell something.
• 24:24
  Dr C: It's so rare that when I do smell something, my brain's like, what is that?
• 24:28
  Dr C: What's going on?
• 24:29
  Dr C: Something's happening.
• 24:29
  Dr C: And then I kind of like, oh my god, I can smell.
• 24:33
  Dr C: So what happens when one of your senses is compromised?
• 24:39
  Nina: Usually, usually the other senses take over and they're a bit more heightened.
• 24:43
  Dr C: Okay.
• 24:44
  Dr C: So I would skip the smell.
• 24:47
  Nina: Yep, yeah, you could skip this, or if it if it's like you can tell by strong fragrances, like if you have a bottle of perfume or some hand lotion, you can just take that out and try to smell that if that helps, you know.
• 25:01
  Nina: But yeah, you would you can skip that one.
• 25:03
  Nina: The point is to just get your mind in presence.
• 25:07
  Nina: So doing all the other ones keeps you in presence.
• 25:10
  Nina: And the last one is taste.
• 25:12
  Nina: So, like, you know, one thing you can taste.
• 25:15
  Nina: And okay, in the moment you might not be eating anything, but a lot of times people have water with them, they have a mint or gum or tea or something.
• 25:25
  Nina: Just take a sip.
• 25:27
  Nina: So these things, this I think this one is one of the most practical, and this is the foundational stuff to have in your toolbox, really, because you can do this anywhere.
• 25:38
  Nina: You could be in a conference room and get real annoyed at work and be able to do this, and no one will know that you're grounding yourself, right?
• 25:48
  Nina: So I think this is this is one of the ones that really help to just anchor your mind back in the now.
• 25:56
  Nina: Another thing is practicing it, practicing it so much that it just is your go-to.
• 26:06
  Nina: Not just this, but any mindfulness skill.
• 26:09
  Nina: If you're able to practice it enough that it's your go-to, then you you start to pay attention to your body and you know when you're starting to dysregulate.
• 26:20
  Nina: So at the first instance of it, you can start to like kind of bring yourself back down.
• 26:26
  Dr C: I love that.
• 26:27
  Dr C: Thank you.
• 26:28
  Dr C: I I feel calmer, I really do.
• 26:30
  Dr C: Just by just by doing that.
• 26:32
  Dr C: And I think it's amazing how you know sometimes simple things can be so powerful.
• 26:38
  Dr C: So thank you for that gift of giving us two actionable ways to kind of ground ourselves and and bring ourselves back to a neutral state so that we can be in the present and and really uh enjoy the present.
• 26:51
  Dr C: And also, you know, we to your point, get out of that fight or flight, right?
• 26:55
  Dr C: Get get out of the if we're at a if if if you look at a spectrum of one being completely calm and ten being about to just turn the table over, right?
• 27:04
  Dr C: Uh that that really can help with kind of bringing you to a neutral state.
• 27:09
  Dr C: And so appreciate that definitely.
• 27:12
  Dr C: So we have tools for the moment, but how does consistently showing up with mindfulness help us evolve over time and maybe change our relationship with ourselves or our emotions?
• 27:27
  Nina: Consistency.
• 27:29
  Nina: So if you're consistent, if you establish a mindfulness practice and you are consistent with it, that's where the transformation happens.
• 27:40
  Nina: Because at first, mindfulness just feels like a pause, but over time that pause becomes power, right?
• 27:48
  Nina: You start noticing your patterns, your tones, your triggers.
• 27:53
  Nina: You you notice.
• 27:54
  Nina: I just just now I talked about body awareness.
• 27:57
  Nina: You you you get better body awareness.
• 28:00
  Nina: And rather than like being ruled by them, you're you're and feeling kind of out of control.
• 28:12
  Nina: You you get to choose how you respond.
• 28:16
  Dr C: Oh, I love that.
• 28:18
  Dr C: So we have power.
• 28:19
  Nina: We don't feel you have power, you gain your power back.
• 28:22
  Nina: You don't feel out of control by the emotions.
• 28:25
  Nina: You're able to, you're able to be in charge of those emotions.
• 28:30
  Nina: So it's that rewiring that we talked about.
• 28:34
  Nina: And it's more compassion and and it gives you more clarity.
• 28:38
  Nina: And and another point is it carries over, right?
• 28:42
  Nina: Like it carries over to your friends and your family and has the capacity to heal like what we call like generational burdens or generational curses that get passed down in families.
• 28:55
  Nina: It really, it really does because you know, a lot of times dysregulation shows as like anger, anxiety, you know, abuse.
• 29:04
  Nina: It's a lack of control of those emotions.
• 29:08
  Nina: And if you're able to establish that like consistent mindfulness practice, you can recognize the patterns and you can recognize when you're dysregulating, and you can recognize the patterns in yourself and your family and your friends.
• 29:23
  Nina: Because no one has the right to disrupt your peace.
• 29:26
  Nina: Like that is your right to be, to have that sense of peace.
• 29:30
  Nina: And there's a lot of people that exist so disconnected and so dysregulated and so deep in their own hurts and their own emotion that it just like spews from them, right?
• 29:47
  Nina: And it's very easy to pick that up.
• 29:49
  Nina: And if you are you know what peace feels like, you know when that's happening, and you can.
• 29:59
  Nina: I love that.
• 30:01
  Dr C: Yeah.
• 30:01
  Dr C: So, you know, I know you're thinking of making content for children.
• 30:06
  Dr C: And I can we talked earlier in the episode about how we're not brought up this way, right?
• 30:11
  Dr C: We're not brought up to to breathe and and to learn how to kind of regulate ourselves or even know what our triggers are so we walk we can anticipate, right?
• 30:22
  Dr C: When we're when we're in a situation like, oh, this is this is this is gonna trigger me, right?
• 30:26
  Dr C: And so how do you how do you protect yourself?
• 30:28
  Dr C: How do you go in?
• 30:29
  Dr C: How do you how can you be strategic in really kind of taking care of your yourself and environments like that?
• 30:36
  Dr C: So how does starting this practice early shape a person's life?
• 30:43
  Nina: It can have like an incredible impact.
• 30:46
  Nina: It really can.
• 30:48
  Nina: Children learn what we model.
• 30:50
  Nina: And you know, when we teach mindfulness early, even if it's something as small as like, let's take a breath before we speak, let's count to 10.
• 31:04
  Nina: With my kids, I use a lot of smell the roses and blow out the birthday candle.
• 31:11
  Dr C: I love that.
• 31:11
  Dr C: Inhale and exhale.
• 31:13
  Dr C: I love that.
• 31:14
  Nina: Inhale and exhale, we count a lot, we count a lot.
• 31:18
  Nina: And and also like allowing kids to feel, right?
• 31:28
  Nina: Because they're not, they're little, they don't know how to regulate yet, but you know, with them crying it out or feeling, they know that later on you will, it's important to talk to them about that.
• 31:41
  Nina: So you were crying, you cried it out.
• 31:43
  Nina: Were you feeling sad?
• 31:44
  Nina: Were you feeling angry?
• 31:46
  Nina: Were you feeling frustrated?
• 31:48
  Nina: So learning what those feelings that they're feeling when they're doing whatever, it helps them learn that body awareness.
• 31:58
  Nina: Like what's what where am I feeling it?
• 32:00
  Nina: Am I feeling it in my chest?
• 32:02
  Nina: Am I feeling it in my face?
• 32:04
  Nina: Am I feeling, you know, in my stomach?
• 32:07
  Nina: So all of that is important because they carry that with them as they go.
• 32:13
  Nina: If a if a kid is feeling angry and that angry ganger is in their stomach, anytime they feel that that dregulation or that pang in their stomach, they know, oh, I'm getting, I'm starting to get irritated, I'm starting to get angry, I need to take a breath, I need to kind of pay attention to why I'm angry right now.
• 32:36
  Dr C: And I love I love being able to name it, right?
• 32:39
  Dr C: Because a lot of times we can't necessarily name our emotion.
• 32:43
  Dr C: So I feel like if you can't name your emotion, you can't kind of get to the root of why you're having that emotion and then get to the point of how do you how do you get to it, how do you work through it, right?
• 32:56
  Nina: Right.
• 32:56
  Nina: And if you if you like pay attention, you will feel that emotion in your body somewhere.
• 33:03
  Nina: And I don't know if you've ever done that, but like try it next time.
• 33:10
  Nina: Next time you feel an emotion, you're gonna feel it somewhere.
• 33:15
  Dr C: And what is that what does that mean?
• 33:16
  Dr C: So I'll I'll pay attention next time.
• 33:19
  Dr C: Um, but I'm I'm thinking my stomach, maybe you know, I'm thinking I I probably more than likely feel a lot of my stress in my stomach.
• 33:29
  Dr C: So does it matter where you feel it?
• 33:32
  Dr C: It's gonna be different for everybody, and but the but the strategies will be the same, it's just being aware of where you feel it in your body and kind of understanding what it is and where it's coming from.
• 33:44
  Dr C: Is that because it's gonna feel different, right?
• 33:46
  Nina: So, like you might have like hold your stress in your body, I hold it in my shoulders.
• 33:52
  Nina: So if I'm going doing my day-to-day and I'm just you know going through the day and I feel really tight at the end of the night, oh, this was a really stressful day.
• 34:01
  Nina: Okay, I need to like do what I need to do to get that kind of tension eased, right?
• 34:09
  Nina: Sometimes we go through our day so much that we don't pay attention, and then we start to have these pain.
• 34:18
  Nina: Oh, my leg hurts, oh my god, migrate, and that's like your body telling you it's sending you a message, and if you start to pay attention, that hey, every time I feel this hot feeling, I must be getting irritated at this conversation.
• 34:38
  Nina: What and then it gives it allows you to be more self-aware because then you can kind of go back and think, why am I getting irritated by this conversation?
• 34:49
  Nina: Right.
• 34:49
  Nina: So the body awareness piece is really important.
• 34:54
  Dr C: I love that.
• 34:55
  Dr C: Thank you.
• 34:56
  Dr C: Nina, I'm so grateful for your time, your wisdom, most of all, your heart.
• 35:03
  Dr C: I you're very passionate about this, and you're obviously very you're an expert, right?
• 35:08
  Dr C: You know what you're talking about.
• 35:10
  Dr C: And I love that you talked about how you're even how you even use it with your own children.
• 35:15
  Dr C: You know, sometimes we tend to think those that are therapists or someone in a leadership position, they got it all figured out, right?
• 35:24
  Dr C: They got it made in the shade.
• 35:26
  Dr C: And so just to hear you talk about your own stress and where you feel it, and and you understanding, like, okay, I have to do something about it, or talking to your children and helping them really understand their how how to deal with their emotions.
• 35:38
  Dr C: So thank you for for being transparent and for really helping us with some easy techniques and also understanding that we can go to your YouTube channel and we could continue to learn some mindfulness strategies and activities.
• 35:55
  Dr C: And I'm really looking forward to the children section that you're you're building out because I have four granddaughters and I know that this is going to be very beneficial for them.
• 36:05
  Dr C: And so thank you so much.
• 36:06
  Dr C: Thank you for sharing your gifts with us today.
• 36:12
  Nina: No, I was just saying thank you for having me.
• 36:14
  Nina: It's it's been it was a such a like wonderful, peaceful, energetic conversation.
• 36:22
  Dr C: It was very I feel very calm.
• 36:23
  Dr C: I do, and not just because you know we're talking about mindfulness, but I really felt the breath work helping me.
• 36:30
  Dr C: So I so for everyone listening, please go to subscribe to act this.
• 36:35
  Dr C: Please say that please say it.
• 36:39
  Nina: Acclivity, mindfulness on YouTube.
• 36:43
  Dr C: My Latina tongue for some reason keeps saying accessibility.
• 36:49
  Dr C: So I apologize.
• 36:53
  Nina: It's okay.
• 36:53
  Nina: Acclivity means I know it's like an unusual word, right?
• 36:57
  Nina: But it means to rise.
• 36:58
  Nina: And when I thought of naming my practice, I really wanted, I thought of, you know, we we we're we're all kind of stuck sometimes.
• 37:07
  Nina: We all feel stuck, and you know, we want to rise out of that stuckness.
• 37:11
  Nina: So I that that's why it's so meaningful to me, that acclivity word, even though it's a very unusual word, it's not a word that people use all the time.
• 37:21
  Dr C: Well, I learned a new word.
• 37:22
  Dr C: Acclivity means rise.
• 37:25
  Dr C: And so please make sure you are visiting the Acclivity Mindfulness on YouTube channel and enjoying the mindfulness practices that Miss Nina has developed for us all in using it for your own toolkit.
• 37:42
  Dr C: And also tell a friend, tell a friend and let them understand the benefits of mindfulness practices, and please share this with a child as well so that they can start understanding how to regulate themselves and name their emotions from the very beginning of their lives so that when they become adults, they are practicing mindfulness and having an amazing, amazing uh wellness opportunity for themselves.
• 38:08
  Dr C: So thanks again, Nina, for joining us.
• 38:10
  Dr C: Wow, what a powerful episode.
• 38:12
  Dr C: What a calming conversation.
• 38:14
  Dr C: As we close out this episode, I wanted to leave you with a few takeaways from the chat with Nina.
• 38:20
  Dr C: The first one is that our emotional storms are real, but they don't have to define us.
• 38:25
  Dr C: With mindfulness, we can learn to be the calm observer, the anchor, rather than the ship being tossed on the waves.
• 38:33
  Dr C: Second, the power of simple accessible tools.
• 38:36
  Dr C: Remember the grounding exercises Nina walked through.
• 38:40
  Dr C: The breathing, anchoring your breathing, and also using your senses.
• 38:45
  Dr C: Five, four, three, two, one.
• 38:48
  Dr C: You have the ability to soothe your own nervous system in just a few moments.
• 38:53
  Dr C: And my invitation to you this week is to try just one of them the next time you feel that storm brooding inside of you.
• 39:00
  Dr C: And finally, the beautiful reminder that this is hard work.
• 39:04
  Dr C: It's about showing up for ourselves with compassion so that we can better show up for the world around us, for those we love, lead, and mentor.
• 39:12
  Dr C: And for everyone listening, please deepen your practice by subscribing to Nina's incredible YouTube channel and checking out her programming in Acclivity Mental Health Counseling.
• 39:25
  Dr C: Until next time, keep on learning, stay inspired, continue to flourish, and never stop evolving.
• 39:34
  Dr C: I'm your host, Dr.
• 39:35
  Dr C: C, and this is the Life Podcast.