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Episode 2: Self Love- The Ultimate Healer · Heal Yourself Podcast

• 0:03
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Heal Yourself Podcast, where we dive deep into all things healing.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: I'm Denise, a speech-language pathologist and a self-love coach for adults and teens.
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: And I'm Kira, a traditional naturopath and functional nutritionist, and we are here to guide you through the transformative process of healing your body, mind and soul.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: From the latest in functional medicine to nurturing your relationship with yourself, healing trauma and even transforming your money story.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: We're here to empower you with the knowledge and tools to create lasting change.
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: So, whether you're looking to heal physically, emotionally or spiritually join us as we explore the many paths to wholeness and wellness.
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: Welcome back to another episode.
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: Today, Denise and I are talking about one of our favorite topics, self-love, which is totally related to healing, although many times people don't think it does.
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: So, Denise, why don't you start us off with just sharing what self-love even is?
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: So this is my favorite topic, so I can talk for everybody, but I'm not promise.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: So what I've learned is that the most important relationship we can have is the one that we have with ourselves.
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: Amen.
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: Self-love is the key to healing that relationship and actually any relationship, and it's important, as you know, kira, to healing any problem, from physical to emotional and anything in between.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: Self-love is put, it's very simple it's literally putting yourself first filling your cup before you serve anyone, because you really cannot serve from an empty cup.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: So if your cup is empty, there's nothing coming out of it.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: So it's taking care of you and being truly your own best friend.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: Self-love is not selfish and it's not greedy and I hear that a lot like.
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: It's so selfish to take care of me, it's so selfish to only think of me, etc.
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: But it's not.
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: It's taking care of you, it's being your own best friend.
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: And then a lot of people talk about the importance of self-love.
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: So I wanted to kind of like just you know, list a few quotes from you know people that are amazing.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: So Wayne Dyer said you cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with.
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: And to go back to the most important relationship is the one you have with yourself.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: And Maya Angelou said if I'm not good to myself, how can I expect anyone else to be good to me?
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: So it always starts with you and with self.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: So I want to chime in on the Wayne Dyer quote.
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: That is so good because it's so true when we look at health.
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: I can't tell you how many women that I'll have a conversation with.
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: Like I asked them hey, if I tell you to go, take 15 minutes to yourself, what are you going to do?
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: And a lot of times it's like well, I'm going to clean the kitchen, I'm going to do some laundry, I'm going to do this.
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: I'm like can you be alone with yourself?
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: Can you be silent?
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: And a lot of times no, because it's negative thoughts and things just running through their mind and that's.
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: That's another conversation about the nervous system.
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: But I think that is a really good self-assessment of like can I be alone with myself?
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: Do I like being alone with myself?
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: Exactly.
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: Exactly, absolutely Well, and I think I think there's misconceptions about self-love and what it means to and obviously we're going to dive into that but I tell people it forms the basis for mental and emotional health, right, Like there is a strong connection between self-love.
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: I can't talk today between self-love and physical health, and what I mean by that is, if we're looking at food choices, right, if you're always reaching for cookies, for junk food, for things that you know are not serving you, that right, there is an indication of a lack of self-love.
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: If you unconditionally loved yourself, you would be making the choices that served you, like getting exercise, going outside and doing sunlight, setting boundaries how you speak to yourself and I'm also going to throw out, and you mentioned this but self-love allows you to love others better too, and all of that is going to tie in with physical health, so it doesn't mean like oh yeah, I love myself, I'm great.
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: We're not talking about having a big head and an ego.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: Right, right, exactly.
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: We're not talking about bragging or you know like, just you know like I'm almighty, or whatever.
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: It's because, at the end of the day, like you said, if you don't love yourself, how can you love others?
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: If you don't take care of yourself, how can you take care of others?
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: So that's why it always starts with you, because always, let's go back to the airplane.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: They don't say, oh, put the oxygen mask on everybody else and then put it on you.
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: They say, take care of you, get your breathing going, and then you can help so many others.
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: Right, because if you put the mask, you know, on everybody else who's going to suffer, you, right?
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: So I always, you know, remind myself that I'm not, I'm not selfish, I'm not greedy, because I'm actually.
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: And it also shines through you.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: When you know, when you love yourself, it's a different vibe, it's a different energy you put out to the world and you're also kind of like indirectly setting a boundary how others, you know, will interact with you when this is how you present yourself, that you, you know, you love yourself and it just I don't know.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: But anyway, talking about self-love is great, but you know how it is actually doing the work is even better and what I've discovered in my you know, research and my reading and talking to you and listening to so many mentors that I found that affirmations is a really, really, really important tool to begin on that journey to change your inner dialogue.
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: So what are affirmations?
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: Simply anything that we say or think is an affirmation.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: Anything, literally, like anything that's playing in your mind, is an affirmation.
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: Anything that you say out loud is an affirmation.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: All of your self-talk sorry, the self-talks, yeah, I can't talk the internal dialogue in your mind is the continuous stream of affirmation.
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: And what do these affirmations do?
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: They send messages to your subconscious mind and they shape your thoughts that you consistently think about, all the habitual thoughts and that affect your behaviors.
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: So I'm chiming in.
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: Sorry, I'm chiming in.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: Don't be sorry, girl.
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: That's how a podcast is.
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: It's a conversation I was going to say we're going to interrupt each other, guys, you're going to figure that out real quick.
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: But I just think that that is so good because you know I'm talking about subconscious programming.
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: When I do a hypnosis with clients and I think that people just view affirmations as something positive.
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: I'm amazing, I love myself, but it's like in reality it's just the internal dialogue.
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: So pay attention to what that internal dialogue is.
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: If you're we have not decided, if we're going to curse on here, but I'm going to go ahead and kick it off with.
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: If you're talking shit about yourself all day long, you're just reaffirming those beliefs.
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: Yes, right, and I love what you said.
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: Like, okay, you can't just keep saying I'm loud, I'm amazing, I'm wonderful, I'm whatever you want to say, but then internally, internally, you're constantly beating yourself up, internally, you're constantly criticizing yourself, that you're also contradicting yourself, right.
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: And then people say, well, affirmations don't work, it's, it's constant, like it's constantly, you know, reframing those, um, this inner dialogue, those inner thoughts, and, like you said earlier, reframinging them, reframing them to serve and to align with who you are, with who you are meant to be, with the pure being that you are.
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: I love that, I love that, and you know positive affirmations as well.
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: They sow the seeds of the healing thoughts and ideas.
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: They help you build self-confidence, self-esteem, inner peace.
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: And you're planting the seeds.
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: The garden doesn't just, you know, uh, bloom in two seconds, right, you plant the seeds, you water the soil, you take care of it, you take care of it and then you have your gardens to also be patient with that, with that process.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: Trust the process.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: Right, I know it's cliche, but trust the process and what the negative affirmations do, that that negative dialogue that you have.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: They plant destructive thoughts and ideas leading to the negative choices that you earlier talked about, right?
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: So if I am constantly having a negative inner dialogue, I am reaching for those cookies.
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: I am making a different choice, right?
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: So it does affect our choices and the you know, I don't know, it's just like it's something that we just have to, not have to, sorry, um, should it is get to?
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, get to.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: It is important to also recognize and reframe that.
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: So yeah, yeah, well, and that's the thing.
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: Like you said, people hear affirmations and it's like, okay, I just have like these sticky notes that I say over and over to myself and that is good, right.
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: Like I have actually told clients to keep a journal of all the negative thoughts that run through their mind just in one day, and it is amazing what you can even get in eight hours.
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: Then, from there you can construct some affirmations that are going to better serve you, and maybe it is post-it notes.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: Like I'm not opposed to starting with post-it notes around the house, on your mirror, on your computer, wherever you're going, because they're going to serve as constant reminders of this is how I'm reprogramming.
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: Like that's the thing we need to change the affirmations that are running through your mind.
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: So that's one thing that I use and I have some other thoughts.
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: But do you, do you have other ways that you reframe those negative affirmations?
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: Like, what are your thoughts on my post-it note technique?
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: No, I love your post-it note technique.
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: No, I love your post-it note technique, but the post-it notes are amazing and they are great reminders, but remember, how many thoughts a day do we have?
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: Like what's over 60,000 thoughts a day, so we really can't catch all of them.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: I get it, but what I, you know, recommend is um, because you are, you're listening to this podcast, and this podcast is to heal yourself.
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: So I'm really hoping that you're starting to commit to yourself.
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: So what I recommend is finding some time and that you can write down the negative or critical statements that you continuously tell yourself.
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: So, whatever they are.
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: For example, it could be my life is a mess, I should lose weight, or nobody loves me.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: Just make a note of all of those and then start reframing them little by little.
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: So, for example, if you are saying to yourself I should lose weight, instead of saying I should lose weight, you say I have a happy, slender body, or I have a happy, healthy body, whatever you want.
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: Let's say you say nobody loves it.
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: You can reframe that to I experience love wherever I go.
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: It's just.
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: But you have to put it on.
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: I keep saying you have to hear us, it's good to put it on paper so you can one remove it from your head and put it on.
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: I keep saying you have to hear us, it's good to put it on paper so you can one remove it from your head and put it on paper, and you can, so you can see also the criticism that you tell yourself, so you can reframe that.
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: Do you have an example of something that you tell yourself that Like me personally, or like, or you know, like a reframing example?
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so like for me one thing that I've noticed, and I tell my own clients too, just based on my own thoughts, like if I this is not a belief of mine, but I'm going to use it as an example If I have a belief of no one loves me, first off I have to ask myself if that's truth.
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean.
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: Like it's so easy for us to get in our heads.
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: It's like is that true?
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: There are definitely people out there that love me, and maybe it's not.
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: I'm loved everywhere I go, because I'm not in a space to believe that, but it's I am loved by people or I'm loved by some people.
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: So I think there's two things.
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: It's important to be real with yourself on whether that's actually truth or if that's a story you created, and then create the affirmations that are believable for you.
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: Don't just take our examples and run with it, because if you don't believe it and you can't get to that place, it's not going to serve you.
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: So maybe it's a subtle reframe of you know, going from I hate my body, it's failed me, to my body is giving me signals, my body is working to heal.
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: You know it doesn't mean that you have to go from A to Z.
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: Yes, or my body is in the process of healing, uh, yeah, yeah, exactly, I love that you said that, that you got.
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: You need to believe those, what you're saying as well, and also truly trusting the process, because if you've been criticizing yourself for a long time or you've been talking negatively to yourself for a long time, it's not just going to go away right away.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: It is going to take a minute and some of the positive reframing may sound awkward at the beginning, but truly stick with it, because you are lovable, because you exist, you are perfect, because you exist, you are who you are meant to be and you know.
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: Accepting that and wanting to change also is accepting yourself for who you are and wanting to change, versus beating yourself up and wanting to change.
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: So come from a positive side of wanting to change Like I can see myself.
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: I accept myself for who I am and then.
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: But I have this area that I'm in the process of changing.
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: I have this area that I'm in the process of healing.
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and we said it on episode one and we're going to continue to say it Healing is a journey.
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: There's not an end goal.
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: I don't get to a place one day in my forties where I'm like you know what I fully and wholly love myself?
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: It is a work in progress.
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: Like you're going to laugh at this, but doing this podcast, having to listen to myself talk, I'm like, oh my gosh, that is the ultimate act of self-love, because I hate hearing myself talk.
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: I don't know anyone that truly loves it.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: But like that is something for me to work through, right, yeah, yeah.
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: That's a good one.
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: I get the same thing when you sent me the first episode of my gospel.
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm like oh okay, but I listened to it again.
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: So you know I completely agree with you and I love that you reminded us as well about the journey and I want to remind us as well and people listening that also taking accountability, because you said you know, I'm in my, when someone reaches their 40 and they have whatever they have, you didn't get to where you are because, just like it, just randomly happened, we got to where we are in any area of our life because of the choices and the decisions that we've made.
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: So taking accountability is something that is the biggest act of self-love, because now I'm being honest with myself you know what I mean like I am where I am in that, let's say in this whether it's finances or health or whatever emotional relationship, whatever it is, it doesn't just happen by coincidence.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: It's an accumulation of beliefs, it's accumulations of decisions, of choices, et cetera.
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: So that's why it's important to change the inner dialogue so you can, little by little, also change those beliefs that will lead to different decisions and different choices.
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: Wow, that was.
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: I mean, maybe that needs to be a whole podcast episode on just taking responsibility, but, like you were spot on with that, because that gets us out of victim mentality and people don't like to hear like my health issues have come along because of my choices.
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: It's so much easier to blame others genetics, so many things but ultimately we are responsible, so I love that.
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: I think it is the ultimate act of self-love.
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: You're right, yeah, so okay, I want to say something else.
• 16:25
  Speaker 2: So one activity that I have recently had some of my clients do in my membership and if any of you ladies are listening, this is you're.
• 16:34
  Speaker 2: You're shaking your head at me.
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: I already know it because I have had them look in the mirror, either fully dressed or naked, and say I love you to themselves, or write themselves a love letter, and the amount of feedback I've gotten on that activity has been and I have one person in particular that I can think of who's like I can't look in the mirror.
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: I'm like what?
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: You're beautiful, what are you talking about?
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: She's absolutely stunning and she's like I can't look in the mirror.
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: I don't look in the mirror for anything.
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: I'm like absolutely stunning and she's like I can't look in the mirror.
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: I don't look in the mirror for anything.
• 17:06
  Speaker 2: I'm like, oh my gosh, we have so much self-love to do there because I see her beauty and she doesn't see it.
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: So I'm going to throw out two book suggestions.
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: You guys are going to learn real quick.
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: I love throwing out suggestions, but love yourself Like your life depends on it If you can't even look in the mirror or if you're really struggling with self-love.
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: And then the other one, not necessarily totally related to self-love, but it ties in because the body, like the physical body, is always taking note of those negative thoughts and beliefs.
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: So the body keeps the score is a great book.
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I love it, love it, love it, love it.
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: And I do the same thing with the adults and the teens when I do the in-person self-love workshops they're called Radiant Self I do them here in town and I do the same thing with mirror work and they actually I mean it's confidential, they can say whatever they want to say, but they go in front of the mirror and they practice saying I love you or whatever affirmation they chose, like I have them write down one affirmation and what, or one positive thing about themselves and look at themselves in the mirror and talk to themselves.
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: That's something I do as well, and I just want to kind of like chime in on that and say that the most powerful affirmations are the ones that you say in front of the mirror.
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: Why, and that's why sometimes people have trouble looking at themselves in the mirror?
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: Because the mirror reflects the feelings you hold about yourself.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: It reveals those thoughts that you need to change if you wish to create um a joyful and fulfilling life so that's why, sometimes, we avoid looking in the mirror, because it's honest.
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: Same thing.
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: We avoid looking within, same thing.
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: We avoid, you know, taking accountability because it's it's not simple you know what I mean.
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: So that's like.
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: You know, I understand that what we're saying can be, can sound simple, and it is simple.
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: Just don't make it complex.
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean?
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: Just like it's simple but not easy, right?
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: Oh, I love that.
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's simple, thank you see, that's why we have a podcast with me, both of us, because whatever I forget, you're gonna remember and we just complete our thoughts.
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: So, absolutely, absolutely, and then just doing the work like nothing beats, just literally doing the work and practicing, because practice makes the progress, not just wishing and hoping, and you know.
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: So I think the big question is then how do we love ourselves?
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: And I've got, you know, I've got my own thoughts of like.
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: We have strong boundaries with ourselves and with others.
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: We don't get into perfectionism.
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: We do things daily for joy.
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: We don't pick ourselves apart for every flaw, for every.
• 19:54
  Speaker 2: You know, I'll call it a chunk of cellulite.
• 19:57
  Speaker 2: Um, we have learned forgiveness.
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: So there's a lot we can add to that, and I'm going to ask you to chime in in a minute, but I want to share some questions that I have shared with my clients and the women in my membership, and so some of the things I've asked them around self-love are what do you need your body to know on a daily basis, right?
• 20:19
  Speaker 2: So, thinking through, because a lot of times, if you're dealing with health issues especially, you're not saying good things, you don't you know what I mean, you're just picking it apart.
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: So really ask yourself that journal on it, whatever, but what you need your body to know on a daily basis.
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: If you've been ignoring your body, where can you nurture it?
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: If you've been belittling it, where can you show an appreciation for the things that it's doing?
• 20:46
  Speaker 2: Right?
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: It's so easy to fall into the my body's not working.
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: I'm dealing with all these symptoms.
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: I'm like okay, but we know gratitude can change your vibration and help with healing as well.
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: What are the things that are working?
• 21:00
  Speaker 2: Well, your whole body hasn't fallen apart.
• 21:02
  Speaker 2: You're breathing right, like that's pretty big.
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: Exactly, that's the most important thing the breath of life.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's the most important abundance that you have, right?
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: Well, that's the thing.
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: There's so much we can appreciate our bodies, even when it seems like everything is lost.
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: And then my last question is if you've treated your body like an enemy, like many of my clients do, how can you begin to see it as an ally?
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: So, these things right there, at least from a physical standpoint, can really bring about some changes.
• 21:36
  Speaker 2: And, denise, I know you've got some for sure.
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: Yes, you know how I love Anita Moorjani and I'm sure later on in future episodes we will recommend her book because it was a game changer for me I'm not sure it was for you, but yes, it was so.
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: And, kira, we are going to put the questions in the show notes, right, sometimes, like, yeah, I can do that for sure.
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we're gonna put all those questions in case you're listening on the go or you're driving do not Do not, we will put them in the show notes.
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: So when I was listening to one of Anita's podcasts and she said that to love yourself also is to remember how to have fun, stop taking yourself too seriously.
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: Enjoy your life, have fun.
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: Only have one life.
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: So she said, think of the fun things that you'd like to do.
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: Okay, write them all down, all of the fun things that you like to do.
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: What do you find fun, what feels like a real treat for you?
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: And then write them all down and then answer this question how many of those things do I still do today?
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: So you're going to write a list of everything that is a treat for you, everything that makes you happy, everything that's fun that you like to do, and then assess or answer the question of how many of those things I still do today, and then make a list of all the fun stuff from that list and make time at least one hour a week to start with and then keep growing your list.
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: So if you want to start with just like two things on the list from the many things that you chose, that's okay.
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: Start small, like we talked about earlier in previous episodes.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: Always start small, because small changes, make the biggest result, or change, or whatever you want to call it.
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: So just commit to yourself one hour a week to do the things that you put on your list and keep growing it.
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: Damn, I feel like we need a mic drop right here.
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: Seriously, I feel so, seen, Because, even though I feel like I'm doing some of this, I'm going to be I mean, I'm going to be totally transparent with all the listeners of I loved art.
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: Like for those that have no clue, my first major was art.
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: Like I wanted to be an artist from like the age of four I don't know I'd have to ask my mom but drawing and painting and cutting apart cabbage patch clothes, like it was always in the art space and something shifted in me in college and I obviously went a totally different route.
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: But I still love paint and for whatever reason, um, it's not just a lack of self love, there's, there's other stuff that I know I need to dig into, Right, so I'm on the healing journey, but I have resisted painting and my husband's always like, do you have more time?
• 24:34
  Speaker 2: Why don't you spend 30 minutes a day painting?
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: And I'm like well, because I have emails to do or I need to make a social media post.
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: Like for me, I've been avoiding it because I'm telling myself that the business is is more important and that it's not okay for me to take time for myself.
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: Oh, wow.
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: Well, I'm glad that I you know, well, I'm glad that I you know.
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: Go ahead and get on that list, girl, and commit to once a week.
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: So now that we're nearing the end of the episode and I know we've talked a lot about the importance we gave some tips and tools.
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: So we're going to summarize.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: So first step, and everything's going to be in the show notes.
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: So the first step is make a list of the negative affirmation, the criticism, whatever it is, even if it's a list of 20, 30, whatever it is.
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: Do it without judgment.
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: And then pick at least one negative affirmation a week and reframe it to a positive affirmation and practice that positive affirmation in front of the mirror, right, and even if you're going to go as slow as one affirmation per month, it doesn't matter, as long as it becomes a habit and a routine.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: And the last thing is answer those questions that we talked about and we're listening in the show notes and do the things that bring you joy, do the things that bring you happiness, have more fun in your life, yeah, and if you're, if you're resisting something like I'm saying, dig into it right.
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: If you're resisting something like I'm saying, dig into it right.
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: This is part of the journey is implementing some of this stuff and then recognizing other patterns in yourself as well.
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: So if you can't do something, for fun, start digging into why you can't do that.
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: Yes, just like the symptoms tell you something in your body, resistance also tells you something.
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: So resistance could also be coming from old beliefs that are not even yours, right?
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: So, you know, investigate those beliefs as well.
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: I know this is another, probably episode for that, but, yeah, like some of the resistance could be from beliefs that's not even that's not even yours, you know what I mean?
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: So, yeah, awesome, well, you guys have some.
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, just be gentle, right, I don't know, just be gentle and graceful with yourself.
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, all right, you guys have tips.
• 27:09
  Speaker 2: We're going to tell you this every time.
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: Don't just listen, actually implement.
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: But I also Um, in the show notes, let us know what you're implementing, right?
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure, yeah.
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: So show notes, we'll put the summary.
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: I actually have a free self-love hypnosis audio, so I'll throw that in there.
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: Make sure you follow Denise on Instagram.
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: She shares self-love tips and she's working on a course about self-love, so we'll share more about that later.
• 27:39
  Speaker 2: As always, thank you guys for listening and we will see you on the next episode.