Latest / Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot / How to Maximize Your Energy 1/7: You're the Driver — Stop Riding Someone Else's Bus #MakingMovesMonday

Transcript

How to Maximize Your Energy 1/7: You're the Driver — Stop Riding Someone Else's Bus #MakingMovesMonday · Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot

• 0:06
  SPEAKER_00: Greetings and welcome.
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the sweet spot.
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_00: It is Monday.
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_00: It is making moves Monday here on the sweet spot, and I'm so glad you're back.
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_00: I'm totally psyched that you're here with me, and that we're gonna do another week together here on the sweet spot, unpacking yet another book that makes perfect sense for us.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_00: This book is called The Energy Bus.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: That's right, The Energy Bus.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you've read it already, maybe you know about it.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_00: It's written by an author called John Gordon, and it was written in 2007.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_00: And in this book, there are basically 10 ideas, 10 rules that help us stay positive, help us stay on track, and help us really push optimism as the energy that's gonna carry us through the week.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm gonna unpack this book with you, and we're gonna have fun doing it, as we can only do here on the sweet spot the way we vibe.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm Dr.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: Derek Sweet, I'm your host here on The Sweet Spot.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: Many of you already know me.
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_00: And if this is your first time here at The Sweet Spot, welcome.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm a board-certified psychiatrist, I work in elite and high performance circles.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: But as I say to everyone on the sweet spot, we are teammates more than anything else.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: We are teammates, and we are in the game of life, and today we're gonna get through it together.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: So wherever you are, let's buckle up and let's dive in.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: Let's dive into the sweet spot.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_00: Alright now, it's Monday, okay, and as you know, Monday always has some kind of a question.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_00: And the question is, what move are you gonna make?
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_00: Because this is making moves Monday, and we need to know what move you are gonna make.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: This book we're looking at, The Energy Bus, puts us right into that question.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: And the question I have for you, based on this book by John Gordon, is this Are you driving or are you being driven?
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: Well, the book is called The Energy Bus, so I'm gonna start off with that question.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: Are you driving or are you being driven?
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_00: To understand this question, let me get you right into the story of this book, The Energy Bus.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: So in 2007, John Gordon, a leadership expert, he writes this book.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_00: It's called The Energy Bus.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_00: And in the book, a main character, George, is failing.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: He's not doing well, things are just not going great for George.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_00: His marriage is struggling, it's on the brink.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_00: His career, well, it was in a free-fall, and and one month Monday morning, funny, it's a Monday, one Monday morning, not unlike this one, George's car breaks down.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_00: I think he had a flat tire.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: I can't remember, but his car breaks down, right?
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_00: And so he has to catch a bus.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_00: So he catches a city bus, and purely accidentally on this bus happens to be this driver, and her name is Joy.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_00: And on this bus ride in the book, Joy gives George 10 rules that changes everything.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: And we're gonna rock and roll through these 10 rules because they're kind of cool.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: Today we're just gonna deal with one rule, and here's the rule the first rule that Joy gave George on the bus.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: And here it is, directly from the book.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna just uh take the chapter directly from the book, the passage directly from the book.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_00: Always remember that you are the driver of your bus.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: It's the most important of the rules because if you don't take responsibility for your life and control of your bus, then you can't take it where you want to go.
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_00: If you're not the driver, then you'll always be at the whim of everyone else's travel plans.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's rule one.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: Simple.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_00: It's almost too simple, it's so straightforward until you kind of sit with it and let it marinate for a minute.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_00: Until we start looking honestly at our own lives and asking ourselves, how long are we gonna keep riding the back of this bus?
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: How long have you been riding in the back?
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you know, in psychiatry, in psychology, we have this concept called the locus of control.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: So there are two types of loci, right?
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_00: There's there's the internal locus of control and the external locus of control.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_00: And as you know, the internal locus of control means you believe your outcomes are shaped by your own choices and your own actions.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_00: That's the internal locus of control.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: Make sense?
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_00: Of course it does.
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_00: But then there's the external locus of control, and I'm gonna tie this into driving the bus.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_00: The external locus of control means that you believe your life is governed by external things, by circumstances, by other people and their reactions and their opinions and their thoughts, by luck, or by systems that are beyond you.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_00: Whatever your locus of control is, internal or external, the research around this idea in psychiatry and psychology is very consistent and very unambiguous.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_00: Basically, the bottom line here is people with a strong internal locus of control show a much better mental health profile and outcome.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: They have better resilience, they they achieve things at a higher rate, and they have a faster rebound or recovery, a bounce back from adversities and challenges when they have an internal locus of control, meaning that they believe their outcomes are shaped by their own choices and their actions.
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_00: But here's the part that they don't always put in the textbook that the locus of control that I'm talking about here, internal or external, is not a personality trait that you're born with.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: It's a decision.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: It's a decision you make or refuse to make every single morning, this morning, this Monday morning, this making moves Monday morning, literally, that decision is on the table for you.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: There's a line from Kobe Bryant that I come back to again and again in my work with performers, athletes, whoever, and and and Kobe said, I never needed an external force or external forces to motivate me.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_00: That's that mamba mentality.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_00: Think about what that means.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_00: No coach had to convince him that he was worth developing.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: No crowd had to chant his name for him to get into the hype mode or to get him into the gym or to do anything.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: No contract clause, no media pressure, no external scoreboard, nothing.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: No external force was pushing him.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_00: This was all internal locusts.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_00: Kobe also said this: I never felt outside pressure.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: I knew what I wanted to accomplish, and I knew how much work it took to achieve those goals.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_00: Then I put in the work and I trusted in it.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_00: Besides, the expectations I placed on myself were higher and more meaningful than anything the world could project onto me.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_00: You know what that is?
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: That's driving the bus.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_00: That's what a driver looks like.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: That's rule one here in this book, The Energy Bus by John Gordon.
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_00: That's is what rule one looks like in a body, in a career, in a life.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_00: Kobe didn't wait for someone to hand him the wheel.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_00: He took it every single day before the sun came up.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_00: He was added.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_00: So this is the hard truth, and I want to speak directly to you today.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: To the athlete, if you're an athlete, maybe you're waiting on the coach to believe in you before you believe in yourself.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you're a professional and you're waiting for the company to finally recognize your value before you kind of fully give them everything you got.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_00: Like maybe you're a student and you're waiting for the system to give you permission to be great.
• 9:46
  SPEAKER_00: Or maybe you're just that person pointing at the traffic, the economy, I don't know, the upbringing you had, the diagnosis that you're carrying, the relationship that's working or not working, and using it, frankly, as the reason why your bus isn't moving.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_00: Today on Making Moves Monday, right?
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_00: I am by no means dismissing what you feel.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_00: I am not dismissing your obstacles.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_00: Real obstacles exist.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_00: There are systemic obstacles, there are biological obstacles, there are psychological obstacles, historical ones.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, they are real, right?
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: But here's what John Gordon, the author of The Energy Bus, understood and what he was trying to communicate.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_00: And what every person I have ever watched in my work in sports and performance psychology and psychiatry in my clinical work, I've eventually come to see.
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_00: And here's what I've seen, and what this book, why I love this book.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_00: The moment you stop waiting for someone else to drive to take the wheel, everything in life changes.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_00: Not because your obstacles disappear, but because you pick up the wheel, you start driving the bus.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_00: And the writer Gordon, John Gordon puts it very plainly in the book.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_00: The power of choice is your greatest gift.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_00: When you claim it, he said, everything starts to change.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_00: Not your talent, not your resume, not your network, your choice.
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_00: And here's the thing about gifts.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_00: They don't.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_00: When you get a gift, what's the thing that you have to do in order to understand the gift, to see it?
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_00: What do you have to do first with the gift?
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_00: Gifts don't work unless you open them, unwrap them.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_00: You gotta unwrap the gift.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_00: And that's important that you unwrap the gift.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_00: You can't have somebody uh taking the gift for you because if you start giving your gifts away, people might not unwrap them.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_00: They might just take them, tuck them under their arm, and walk away with them.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_00: They may not even unwrap it in front of you.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_00: Look, nobody's coming to drive your bus for you.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_00: Facts.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_00: They never were.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes they pretend, they'll sit in the driver's seat and act like they want to drive the bus with you or for you, but they're not.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_00: Nobody's coming to drive your bus for you.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_00: I hate to be the bearer of such bad news on Monday, but we've got to face it.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_00: They never were coming to drive the bus.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_00: The wheel has been sitting there empty, waiting for you to decide that you are worthy of this bus and driving it.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_00: And today, I'm making moves Monday.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_00: Whatever it is, you must decide to drive this bus.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_00: And the ancient wisdom always backs us up, right?
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_00: In the ancient wisdom, there's a moment in the Gospel of John, chapter 5, where Jesus approaches this dude who's been lying by this pool.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_00: I think he's paralyzed or something like that.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: He's been at some pool.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's I I recall it being Bethesda in the word, right?
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_00: In the ancient wisdom.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_00: The guy's been at this pool paralyzed or something like that, or not able to move a whole lot, for 38 years, waiting to be healed, waiting for the waters to wash over him and heal him.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_00: And and the problem is he couldn't get into the water, and he was waiting for someone to carry him in.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_00: And Jesus comes by, and so I'm thinking, oh well, Jesus is coming by.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_00: He's just gonna be thrown into the pool.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus is gonna wave his hand away and just sort of anoint him and bless him and help him to get up.
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_00: Here's what Jesus did though.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus doesn't ask him to that Jesus doesn't just ask him, How you doing?
• 13:49
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus asks him a medical kind of question.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_00: He's asking, Well, do you want to be he?
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_00: This is one of the most important questions a physician can ever ask a patient.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_00: Do you want to be made well?
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_00: Not can you be made well, not will somebody make you well.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_00: Do you want it?
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_00: Because when you want it, you see, you see, wanting it and choosing it and getting behind the wheel of your own healing, your own issue, your own obstacle, that's always the first step.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_00: Rule one of the book has been in scripture and ancient wisdom for 2,000 years.
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_00: John Gordon, this author of the energy bus, he just put rule one on the bus.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_00: He just put this rule on the bus.
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_00: You got to drive your own bus.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_00: Jesus told that dude, do you want to be well?
• 14:52
  SPEAKER_00: Do you want to be healed?
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_00: And here's your assignment for today.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_00: Couple of minutes, maybe less.
• 15:00
  SPEAKER_00: Think about something in your life where you've been a passenger and not the driver.
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_00: A passenger, you know, waiting, sort of drifting, deflecting, avoiding, procrastinating, just sort of not being the driver.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: Honestly, just name it.
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: And then write it down somewhere.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_00: Think about one action you could take today that puts you behind a wheel in this particular area.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: We don't need a life plan or life strategy, just one action that you can take today that puts you in the driver's seat of this bus.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_00: And then do it.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_00: You know why we gotta do this today?
• 15:46
  SPEAKER_00: It's Making Moves Monday, and the bus doesn't wait.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_00: The bus doesn't wait.
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_00: And neither does your life or your potential.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_00: Now is the time, beloved.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_00: Now is the time, sweet smarter.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, this author, John Gordon, this book, The Energy Bus, and the 10, the 10 uh messages that he has, we're gonna unpack them.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_00: He opens this book with a man who almost missed his Monday entirely.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_00: His car was broken, George's life was broken, his marriage was in terrible shape, his vision was all messed up, but he got on the bus by accident and he found the one thing that could put everything back together for him again.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_00: You know what that was?
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_00: A decision.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_00: A decision.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_00: This Monday, you don't need an accident.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need the flat tire, you don't need the crisis.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you already have the issue.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_00: I just want you to hear me loud and clear.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_00: The bus is yours.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_00: The wheel is empty, and the tank is full.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_00: The road is open, sweet spotter.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_00: Let's get in and get behind it.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_00: Alright now, you've been listening to the sweet spotters, making moves Monday, and we're in, we're in, we're we're riding the energy bus with John Gordon, the author.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, and I hope today our science, soul, and success approach has been helpful to you.
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_00: Science is giving you the map today, the soul is giving you the fuel, and now success is yours as you make the decision to drive forward.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_00: Tomorrow, sweet spotter, tomorrow, we are going in on Take Action Tuesday.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_00: We're gonna continue this book, The Energy Bus.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_00: We're gonna keep looking for pearls and wisdom.
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_00: We're gonna see what rule two tells us, what the second rule is all about, and we're gonna we're gonna keep driving until we get to our destination.
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_00: Now let's move.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_00: Moving means subscribing.
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_00: If you haven't subscribed to this before, it's completely free, and sharing it with somebody who you think could use a move this Monday.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_00: Love and blessings.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_00: This is the sweet spot.
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Dr.
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_00: Derek Sweet, and we're all in.