Latest / The FEEL Podcast: Women’s Empowerment, Emotional Wellness and Self-Leadership with Melissa Crook / Calendar Cleanse: How to Reclaim Your Time, Set Boundaries, and Stop Overcommitting with Melissa Crook

Transcript

Calendar Cleanse: How to Reclaim Your Time, Set Boundaries, and Stop Overcommitting with Melissa Crook · The FEEL Podcast: Women’s Empowerment, Emotional Wellness and Self-Leadership with Melissa Crook

• 0:12
  Hello, Melissa Crook here at the field Podcast.
• 0:15
  Welcome. Welcome to today's one-on-one
• 0:18
  time with me. We are going to talk about the
• 0:21
  calendar cleanse today. Now this may sound a little bit
• 0:24
  like the feel reset that we talked about a few weeks ago,
• 0:28
  but I thought that it's the end of January.
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  We've had some time to get into 2026.
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  Sometimes we set some goals or some ideas or or make there's a
• 0:39
  list of things we want to really get going in January to live
• 0:42
  2026 more in alignment with ourselves and help our life feel
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  less chaotic and and more properly resourced and
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  supported. But then life gets busy, the
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  kids get sick, the Co worker quits and you got to cover for
• 1:00
  them. An unexpected health issue with
• 1:05
  your parents comes up and you got to go travel.
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  I mean, there's just life lights.
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  And you realize you got to the end of the month.
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  Like, Oh my gosh, I haven't really gone into my calendar yet
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  and done this kind of reset this cleanse.
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  There's still time, there's always time, but we can get you
• 1:24
  thinking about this before the end of January.
• 1:26
  So we're going to talk about the calendar cleanse today.
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  This is also available as one of our online course opportunities.
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  You can get this on an online course and really guide yourself
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  through this for just $47. It's a great way, great
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  investment in yourself. If you need a little more
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  support on this than what I'm going to give you today and
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  really helps you put these practices into place.
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  But it's not too late and it's never too late.
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  You can do this anytime, but so many times at this beginning of
• 1:56
  the year, we get to the end of the month, we're like, I didn't
• 1:59
  get it done and we beat ourselves up and we're so hard
• 2:02
  on ourselves and again, life likes and think we get
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  distracted or and also remember, if this isn't a habit you have,
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  it's one thing to acknowledge that you need to do something
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  and that's the first step. We can't do anything if we don't
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  at first acknowledge something. Some action needs to be taken,
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  but also then we have to put practices into place that act
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  and get used to those practices. We have to practice those
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  practices so they become natural to us, so they become something
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  our systems and brains and nervous systems and ways of
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  thinking are used to. It requires us maybe to unlearn
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  some old habits, to relearn some new healthier ones that are
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  going to support us in. And so even if you did, let's
• 2:53
  say you started the first week and then it's like, oh, I keep
• 2:56
  forgetting this hopefully will help you remind yourself and
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  help you create those practices and, and things that we're going
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  to help you keep in alignment with this.
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  But remember, give yourself time and grace.
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  It takes time. And that's where the online
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  course is so nice because once you have it, you have it for
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  life. You spend that $47, you have it
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  forever. So when you need a reminder, you
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  can go back to it. So that's the great opportunity
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  there. But hopefully this will just
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  help you get back in alignment today.
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  If you're like, no, that's, that's not where I'm going to
• 3:26
  spend my energy and time right now or no, I just needed this
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  reminder today. But always remember you are
• 3:31
  worth the investment. So I'm hoping that one way or
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  another, whether it's taking the information from this episode
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  today, going back and revisiting our other Tuesday episodes this
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  month for the other things we talked about and getting your
• 3:42
  life and calendar in alignment. Or it is spending the time and
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  resources with me to get it done or on the online course.
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  Whatever it is, know that you're worth the investment.
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  And this is going to you're, you're never going to be sorry.
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  You've invested in yourself. And because of the outcomes of
• 4:00
  that, of feeling refreshed and in alignment and present and not
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  exhausted and tattered and worn out and and spread too thin.
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  So that'll get off my soapbox on that before the calendar
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  cleanse. What does that look like?
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  So the calendar is more than a schedule.
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  It's a reflection of your priorities, your boundaries,
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  your self respect. But again, like most of us
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  ambitious women, our days are filled with obligations so many
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  times that don't truly service because we just keep showing up
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  for everybody all the time and don't really think about what
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  we're saying yes or no to until at the other side of it we're
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  worn out, exhausted and realized on the other side of it, Oops.
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  I've over committed there. This is going to help you to not
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  do that. We get overbooked, we get
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  stretched too thin, and then we're constantly squeezing
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  ourselves into the margins. This calendar cleanse is your
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  reset on that. It's a guided process that helps
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  you strip away what no longer belongs and helps you reclaim
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  your time. And it helps you design your
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  calendar in a way that actually supports you and who you want to
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  be. And so it really helps you ask
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  and identify what do I value most right now?
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  Write these things down. Journaling time at night before
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  bed, when you get up in the morning, on your lunch break,
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  look at your calendar. Spot the hidden nose disguised
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  as a yes where I was like I said yes to that.
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  But every time I look at that, I want to throw up.
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  That is one of those, what are we going to do about that?
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  If this allows you then to createspace for nourishment and
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  rest and to align your priorities and allows you to
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  begin honoring yourself through your schedule.
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  So how are you going to do this? Well, we're going to go back to
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  you guys, hear me talk about this a lot, but I'm telling you,
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  this is this is where the groundwork begins.
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  First of all, you know you're valuable, you know you're worthy
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  and you know you get to choose and you really believe that.
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  And that might require some layers work.
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  And if you need support on that, I can help you with that.
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  Go to that contact format and let's get together.
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  But let's go back to those those five activities that nourish
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  you. And there's 5 words on how you
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  want to feel the next six months and describing yourself.
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  Who am I? Not by my titles or my roles or
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  my responsibilities, but who am I?
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  I am content, I am excitable, I am cynical.
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  I mean anything, anything. Whoever you are, describe
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  yourself. I'm curious.
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  Those are the kind of get back and look at those things and
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  then look at your calendar and what things.
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  Honor those things in your calendar and start asking
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  yourself that question. And if it feels like I'm not
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  asking you to clear out and realign your whole calendar one
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  time, pick that one thing, that one thing, and it's something
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  that might be a little easier to start with.
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  It doesn't require maybe as challenging of a conversation or
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  it's a little easier to move out and navigate.
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  What's that one thing that you're going to adjust
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  unapologetically? You're just simply like, you
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  know, I realize that this just doesn't fit right now with all
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  that I've got going on. Can you support me on this or
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  can I, I'm simply going to say no to this this year or come
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  back to me next year. But right now it's not the right
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  time. This isn't a good season for me.
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  But pick that little thing, whether it's maybe it's, it's
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  making cookies for all the holiday parties.
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  I realize that's more than I've got on my calendar.
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  I, I, that's I, I bid off too much with that, you can find
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  somebody else to do it or you can say I, you know, I'm just,
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  it's not going to be baked goods.
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  I might be buying the goods or simply I'm just not going to be
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  able to do that. Can you find somebody else?
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  Whatever it is, but start with something simple and start
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  pulling things out one at a time and and practice not apologizing
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  like I'm so sorry, but I need to.
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  It's like, hey, I've realized I looked at my calendar this year.
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  I realized I needed to shift some things.
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  I realized that I over committed myself.
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  So I need to talk to you about something that I had initially
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  said yes to that I'm now realizing is really taxing time
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  and energy from me, my family, my work responsibilities,
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  whatever the case may be, have that conversation that way,
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  coming in confidently coming in and don't feel like you have to
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  over explain beyond that. And then so again, spotting
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  those hidden nose that are disguised at a yes, and start
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  with one of those at a time. And then don't feel like you
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  have to feel that with something else.
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  That's the other thing We'll say, OK, what am I going to fill
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  it with? Now?
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  If you're going to fill it with anything, fill it with quiet
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  time for you. So the time I would have spent
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  making those cookies for those parties, I'm going to instead,
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  I'm going to sit outside quietly and put, you know, for 10 to 15
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  to 20 to 30 minutes and just rest and refresh.
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  I'm going to go on a walk, I'm going to go to coffee with a
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  girlfriend. I'm going to do some yoga or I'm
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  just going to I'm going to listen to my favorite music,
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  whatever is or I'm just going to be quiet and make space to put
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  more time into the other things that I really want to be putting
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  space into. So don't just feel like you got
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  to go fill it with something else.
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  No, allow it to create the space to be putting your energy and
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  time world where you want it to be.
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  Again, like I said, this creates space for nourishment, rest and
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  aligned priorities. And this allows you to begin
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  honoring yourself through your schedule.
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  And then for the take away today, I'm going to give you the
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  same things that I gave you in the couple weeks ago in the
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  reset. I want you to a no yeses for at
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  least 24 hours. When someone asks you to do
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  something, you give a 24 minimum hour, maybe more.
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  Maybe you need a week, maybe need a month.
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  Depends on the level of the activity.
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  But give yourself that minimum of 24 hours before you decide
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  whether to say yes or not. And really think about it and,
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  and, and take everything into consideration.
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  And then the other thing is, remember, whatever you're saying
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  yes to, you're saying no to something else.
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  Make sure that no isn't to you. And what you need to show up
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  fully resourced and feeling in alignment and looking at your
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  calendar in a way that makes you feel like, oh, you're looking
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  forward to that. Now, like I said, or a few weeks
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  ago, there's always those things we have to do.
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  We got to clean our bathrooms, We got to do the laundry.
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  There's things that we have to do in our lives.
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  There's no amount of yeses or noes.
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  They're going to clear that up. I'm talking about those, those
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  things that we're asked to take on at work that we're afraid to
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  disappoint someone. Those things were asked to take
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  on at school or with the family planning for family reunion that
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  we're, we don't want to disappoint someone.
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  And so we just say yes rather than like being really
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  thoughtful about it and realizing that when we do things
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  at half tank or quarter tank or empty tank, that's not really
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  how we want people to experience us or anything.
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  We've prepared prepared for them.
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  We want to them to remember us as present and resource fields
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  and content and really invested in in whatever it is they're
• 11:59
  receiving from us. And so in order to do that, we
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  have to know where our limits are and we have to be willing to
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  say no to the things that don't honor that.
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  So this is what the calendar cleanse really helps you do if
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  hopefully these these reminders today have been what you need.
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  But if not, if you feel like you need a little more help and
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  guidance, again, that calendar cleanse is available as our
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  introductory online course. Go invest in that.
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  And then you have it for life to go back to and revisit.
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  Or if you feel like you need a little more accountability than
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  that, I can work with you one-on-one.
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  We can go to the fuel reset as well.
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  But hopefully this has been supportive to you and has been a
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  good reminder that there's always time to cleanse your
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  calendar and get it in alignment with you.
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  Whether it's January 1st, January 27th, or December 5th,
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  or any time in between, there's always time to do this.
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  There's always time to invest in you.
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  You're valuable, you're worthy, and you get to choose.
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  Thanks so much for being with me today on the Field podcast.
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  I'll see you here next time. Take good care.