Latest / Bomb Life / Transformed Through Fitness with Stephanie and Melissa |309

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Transformed Through Fitness with Stephanie and Melissa |309 · Bomb Life

0:00
[SPEAKER_02]: When I was in those early stages of going through everything with my mental state, whether I was having really bad anxiety or if I was depressed, anything that I was feeling that I would just usually run to food, I was
0:15
[SPEAKER_02]: would hop on the live on the Facebook group and I would tell everybody.
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[SPEAKER_02]: That way, I was holding myself accountable and showing everybody else like, hey, you're not alone.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I'm also going through this too.
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[SPEAKER_02]: And I know food isn't the answer because all it's doing is making me bigger and honestly feeling like crap.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to the Bond Life Podcast where fitness, vines, and real talk collide.
0:56
[SPEAKER_00]: This is it just about workouts.
0:57
[SPEAKER_00]: It's about transforming your body, mind, and life.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Get ready for unfiltered conversations, expert advice, and the motivation you need to level up in every way.
1:20
[SPEAKER_01]: Hey everyone, welcome to the Bomb Live podcast.
1:23
[SPEAKER_01]: I am Melissa Vogel, you're host, welcome to the show.
1:26
[SPEAKER_00]: If you are brand new, oh my god, welcome, you have landed on the most incredible episode ever.
1:33
[SPEAKER_00]: And if you're returning guests, you're gonna love this one too.
1:36
[SPEAKER_00]: So today's episode is with actually one of my clients.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Stephanie Cruz.
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[SPEAKER_00]: She's absolutely incredible.
1:42
[SPEAKER_00]: She's a mom of four.
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[SPEAKER_00]: She's been married for 12 years.
1:45
[SPEAKER_00]: She was a business woman.
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[SPEAKER_00]: She was in the Marine Corps.
1:47
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, you name it.
1:48
[SPEAKER_00]: This woman was like in it.
1:50
[SPEAKER_00]: And she's also one of my clients.
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[SPEAKER_00]: She is a member of the group, Bizi Tobam.
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[SPEAKER_00]: She has been there for a couple years.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And then she's also one of my clients that was like, nope, you know what?
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[SPEAKER_00]: I need more.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And she is one of my one-on-one clients in my Fitmind coaching program.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And today we are diving all into her journey what she did before what that look like who she was before what she's done to transform her body if you guys look at the photo for this this episode like we'll post on social media and stuff we always have like a photo like on the website we're going to put her before and after photos as like her headshot so the guests always have like a headshot we're going to put her before and after photos on the headshot it's
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[SPEAKER_00]: Everyone, if I put these on my social media before, everyone is like, that's not real.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That's been Photoshopped, that's fake.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm like, no, I get to see Stephanie and her underwear every four weeks, and this is her body.
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[SPEAKER_00]: She has just transformed, and I was like, you need to come on the show.
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[SPEAKER_00]: We need to hear about your journey.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I want to learn even more about you and talk about like what those biggest aha moments were for you.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And we're still in January.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So I was like, I really want to get this done and get this out while we're still in this like new fresh month of 2,026.
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[SPEAKER_00]: 2,025 was her year.
3:01
[SPEAKER_00]: Like, oh my god, did Stephanie ever change in 2,025.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And she's honest, like about it wasn't easy.
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[SPEAKER_00]: while transforming her body and while transitioning into this new person.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And when you can hear real life stories, like I can sit here on the mic and tell you all stories that I want.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And it's like oh sure.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, whatever.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But when you can hear from someone that's living it, breathing it and doing it, it just hits different.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It just speaks to you different.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Stephanie hasn't been on the podcast before, so not only did to take some balls to even get on here and come on, I kind of threw this at her last minute, too.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I kind of like operating like that because then people don't get a chance to freak out or like overthink things.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And the conversation is just absolutely perfect.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So I want you guys to listen to this with an open mind.
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[SPEAKER_00]: If you have questions for me or for Stephanie right into the show, it's Melissa Vogel at gmail.com or you can send me a DM on Instagram.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Make sure you're following it's Melissa Vogel.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I think this episode is going to speak to all of you.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Mail and female Stephanie's journey has just been phenomenal to watch.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And that's the best part of my job.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I get to watch these people transform while they're going through it during the boring times, during the easy times, during the really, really hard times for I'm like here, take my hand and pull in you out.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Let's go, okay, now you got to take back over and it's really cool.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, dude, you have such a good story.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You have got to come on the show and share.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So props to Stephanie, thank you for coming on, Stephanie.
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[SPEAKER_00]: As always, you guys write and review this podcast.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's like you leaving me a huge tip in the tip jar and leave a review to five stars if you feel appropriate and go to the show notes as well.
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[SPEAKER_00]: If you want to book a call with myself with Stephanie, we have links there where you can do that.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Have a conversation.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Let's see what direction you need to move in because Stephanie's journey started with a phone call.
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[SPEAKER_00]: She heard me on another podcast.
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[SPEAKER_00]: went to the show notes booked a call with me and her life has never been the same.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I want all of I want all of that for all of you.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It can just start with one decision.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So go to the show notes, always check out the links that we have there.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and enjoy the show, everyone.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Hey, everyone.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to the bomb life podcast.
5:31
[SPEAKER_00]: Today we have Stephanie Cruz on,
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[SPEAKER_00]: Hi.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I'm so glad to be here.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I'm excited that you're here to you guys.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I have been wanting to have this check on for the longest time.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You already heard in my intro that she is the client and she has someone that is just kicking ass and taking names.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And in 2025, it was like your biggest year ever.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like
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[SPEAKER_00]: absolutely got so much change happened for you this year.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's just it's amazing and I love how much it's going to set the pace for 2026 for you too.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I'm so ready for it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Bring on.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Now Stephanie, you've done so many different things like already and you're so young too.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I mean like you're a mom before.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You've been married for 12 years.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You've been a business owner.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You are in the
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[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, you've done in the Marines.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I should Marine Corps, right?
6:24
[SPEAKER_00]: That's how we say it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, you've already lived such a full life and before coming to visit a bomb, because that's how we originally met.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You had found me and enjoyed there.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, you had, you
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[SPEAKER_00]: already sought so much experience in all different areas.
6:43
[SPEAKER_00]: And the transition and the transformation that I've seen in I say transition because you really have not just transformed a different person like you have literally transitioned into like a new life.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, absolutely.
6:56
[SPEAKER_00]: It's been insane to watch you guys.
6:58
[SPEAKER_00]: Like it's been it's the best part of my job, too.
7:01
[SPEAKER_00]: And the coaching side and what I do, it's so cool to watch people literally transition into a new human.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And then you just transform everything around you.
7:11
[SPEAKER_00]: This journey started for you, though, like a long, long time ago.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like, I think, you know, you're eating and exercise and everything and you realize this too along the way of how much our childhood, our teenage years mold us into who we are today.
7:27
[SPEAKER_00]: And that's, I know that's better basis for you of like a learning, how much that impacts how you think today, like what little Stephanie or teenage Stephanie impacts you today.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But tell me, like, can you give me a snapshot of your life, you know, before all before meeting me and joining busy to Bob?
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[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_02]: So, I mean, in the very beginning, I started all over different continents.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, I was a military brat.
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[SPEAKER_02]: So, I didn't grow up in one stable position.
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[SPEAKER_02]: We went from California to Washington to Spain to Florida to, and then finally New York.
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[SPEAKER_02]: But I didn't really get settled down somewhere until I was probably like 11.
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[SPEAKER_02]: And that was the first thing I was able.
8:09
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That's crazy.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And then you joined yourself.
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[SPEAKER_02]: Well, you guys, oh, my dad is wearing the Navy.
8:14
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay.
8:15
[SPEAKER_02]: My dad was in the Navy.
8:16
[SPEAKER_02]: My mom was in the Navy.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I joined the Marine Corps.
8:19
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay.
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[SPEAKER_02]: We're okay with that.
8:22
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, absolutely.
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[SPEAKER_02]: They're like, yeah, she's a badass.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So what pushed you to drive the Marine Corps back then?
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[SPEAKER_02]: Honestly, it's not it's not like some great like aha moment of why I joined the Marine Corps if I'm being completely honest it's just because I didn't know what I wanted to do for college and I didn't want to waste my money on not knowing what I wanted to do so I'll like you know what I'll go and use my time wisely and start making a life for myself and just join the military and I've always been all or nothing person so I just went for the the hardest branch.
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[SPEAKER_00]: were you in shape before joining like what did your physical body look like then?
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[SPEAKER_00]: What was your fitness then?
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[SPEAKER_02]: So I mean, I wasn't really in my mind.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I thought I was fat and I always threw the effort around in my head.
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[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my goodness, I'm so fat.
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[SPEAKER_02]: But I mean, honestly, being decides that I was fit in the sense that
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[SPEAKER_02]: I didn't have any extent of a amount of body fat on me.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I just wasn't as strength-wise since we mostly did more like running and cycling, just a lot of cardio kind of things.
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[SPEAKER_02]: There wasn't really any kind of focus on strength training.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I didn't grow up with my parents really ever going to the gym and working out.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So it wasn't like a normal part of your life.
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[SPEAKER_00]: No, and don't that funny because like now it's like I don't live unless I work out.
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[SPEAKER_00]: My life's around it.
9:52
[SPEAKER_00]: Right.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Would you say that you're stronger now than you were then like in your, oh 20s late teens.
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[SPEAKER_02]: Absolutely.
10:00
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_02]: So I mean, I could probably run a little bit better than, but
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[SPEAKER_02]: I'm definitely way stronger.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I'm stronger and ways that are more important to me.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That's what's important.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So okay, in the military, got out.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Why did you leave?
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[SPEAKER_00]: How did that career end?
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[SPEAKER_02]: So I did just one tour.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I did four years of active duty.
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[SPEAKER_02]: Okay.
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[SPEAKER_02]: And when I had gotten out, I was only four months postpartum with my first.
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[SPEAKER_02]: So I'm 22 at this point.
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[SPEAKER_02]: And I have my first
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[SPEAKER_02]: I realize like I don't want to be working while someone else is raising my child, I want to be home and stay with my kids.
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[SPEAKER_02]: So that's what prompted me to not re-enlist into the military.
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[SPEAKER_02]: And as it so happens, my husband and I were actually getting out the very like the same month.
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[SPEAKER_02]: It was just meant to be.
10:56
[SPEAKER_02]: And you guys met in the military?
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[SPEAKER_02]: Yes, we did.
11:00
[SPEAKER_02]: And got married while you were, while you were both against everybody's wishes, by the way, like all of the higher-ups, the master sergeant, the first sergeant, all of the officers, they're like, you shouldn't get married, not as a Lance Corporal, because you're just going to end up being a divorce and be part of those statistics.
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[SPEAKER_02]: But okay, and he's still to thank you.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I was still did it.
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[SPEAKER_02]: What was our deciding factor was he actually was deployed to act in a stand in May of 2013 and then he came back into in a November of 2013 and he had proposed to me back in May.
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[SPEAKER_02]: We were using it as a test run to see if him and I would be able to stay committed to wanting to each other for that whole six months apart and when he got back, we actually ended up getting married months sooner than we originally planned.
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[SPEAKER_02]: who we had planned it for February of 2014.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I had already had like the dress picked out.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I had to then you picked out.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I had all everything planned.
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[SPEAKER_02]: And when he came home two weeks later, I went home with him and we got married at the courthouse.
12:15
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, well, he's an energy available wedding after something.
12:18
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, we kept the wedding date in all those stuff and everybody came for like the ceremony and all that, but we were already legally married by
12:24
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, so I have to say like when people hear that you have a military background and experience, a lot of people automatically go, oh, well, that's why she has this discipline.
12:36
[SPEAKER_00]: That's why she's fit now.
12:37
[SPEAKER_00]: That's why it worked for her in busy to bomb.
12:41
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm serious.
12:42
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm just being honest with you.
12:43
[SPEAKER_00]: Like people will hear that.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And though immediately their brain will think, well, that's why because it makes it easier for them to absorb the information and take the weight off of themselves in responsibility.
12:52
[SPEAKER_00]: So if we fast forward, because I know you're probably a laughing at that, go and oh, little do they know where were you from like when you got out had first baby to honestly till we met what happened to your body and your fitness and I mean, did you stay this bad ass Marine while you had all these babies and stay fit on my gosh, that was.
13:13
[SPEAKER_02]: It was a complete journey.
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[SPEAKER_02]: Let me tell you what, I mean, after I had my first kid, I had no idea what health and fitness truly was.
13:20
[SPEAKER_02]: The military actually doesn't do a good job of teaching you any of that.
13:24
[SPEAKER_02]: I was always considered overweight.
13:26
[SPEAKER_02]: I was always in the the fat body program.
13:30
[SPEAKER_02]: So I was working out probably like about five hours a day eating maybe 1200 calories.
13:36
[SPEAKER_02]: I was not, it wasn't good.
13:43
[SPEAKER_02]: I had no healthy habits beforehand, and this was just to appease the people in the military.
13:48
[SPEAKER_02]: Right.
13:49
[SPEAKER_02]: They weren't actually teaching you how to be healthy.
13:51
[SPEAKER_00]: And so I, on your own, trying to figure that out, and that's your experience you have with being fit, yeah, healthy at a badass.
13:58
[SPEAKER_02]: Yes, that was my experience.
14:00
[SPEAKER_02]: So then I had my first on and I didn't really have to worry about getting all the way back down to wait because you have six months after you have a kid, but I was still like just out there working my ass off trying to get all of this weight off of me.
14:17
[SPEAKER_02]: just walking outside in the heat with like a belly band on trying to sweat it all off that absolutely was not what I needed to do.
14:26
[SPEAKER_00]: So fast forward.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Now you have four kids.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and they're all pretty young.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, we're not talking like teenagers.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So your life is still full before you came in, what was life looking like before you met me?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like do you remember that like six months before we met?
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[SPEAKER_00]: What was life like?
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[SPEAKER_02]: Hectic, extremely hectic.
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[SPEAKER_02]: There wasn't really a plan for anything.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I definitely wasn't working out.
14:54
[SPEAKER_02]: I was working in a kitchen as a baker and a prop chef and then I was working on my relationship with my husband because we were having some other issues over in that department and the only thing that I knew how to do to take control for myself was to just run to some sort of food so I could feel something other than nothing and with where I had lived at that moment.
15:22
[SPEAKER_02]: I was like walking distance from Dairy Queen.
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[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, shit.
15:25
[SPEAKER_02]: So multiple times a week, it would be cheese curds and a blizzard.
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[SPEAKER_02]: And I would go there and tell myself, oh, I'll just get a large of each of them and share it with the kids.
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[SPEAKER_02]: Biggest lie that I've ever told myself.
15:39
[SPEAKER_02]: Biggest fly.
15:40
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
15:40
[SPEAKER_02]: And never turns out that way.
15:42
[SPEAKER_02]: Absolutely not.
15:43
[SPEAKER_02]: No.
15:44
[SPEAKER_02]: Mom, can I have a bite and give them the tiniest bite?
15:46
[SPEAKER_02]: Right.
15:47
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, I'll for me.
15:48
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, and what kind of control did that offer, too?
15:51
[SPEAKER_00]: Because everyone has marital issues and ups and downs and family.
15:56
[SPEAKER_00]: And all of that seeps in and impacts us.
15:59
[SPEAKER_00]: And a lot of it, we don't have control over.
16:00
[SPEAKER_00]: We can't control other people.
16:02
[SPEAKER_00]: We talk about that all the time.
16:04
[SPEAKER_00]: But having that food and being able to make that choice,
16:09
[SPEAKER_02]: Yep.
16:10
[SPEAKER_02]: It offers us the control of when we can have our dopamine.
16:15
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, that is all it was.
16:18
[SPEAKER_00]: Yep.
16:20
[SPEAKER_00]: So before you called or before you booked a call, because that's how I would do it back then.
16:24
[SPEAKER_00]: My people would see me somewhere.
16:27
[SPEAKER_00]: Do you remember where you found me?
16:28
[SPEAKER_00]: How's it?
16:28
[SPEAKER_02]: I found you on Dr. MindyPell's podcast.
16:33
[SPEAKER_02]: That's right.
16:34
[SPEAKER_02]: You were her guest speaker and then I clicked on the link to go to your website and I booked a call.
16:39
[SPEAKER_00]: That's right.
16:40
[SPEAKER_00]: I forgot about that.
16:41
[SPEAKER_00]: What made you book?
16:42
[SPEAKER_00]: Like, what was the biggest driving factor of like, I am over this.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like, I can't do this anymore.
16:48
[SPEAKER_00]: What was that like, I can't do this anymore for you.
16:51
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my gosh, the biggest factor at that point of time was feeling like my hormones were just absolutely out of whack and completely in balance.
17:03
[SPEAKER_02]: And they ended up being in balance, once we finally got someone to listen to me.
17:08
[SPEAKER_02]: But I needed someone to be in my corner to
17:12
[SPEAKER_02]: help me navigate this.
17:14
[SPEAKER_02]: I knew that I needed to eat healthier.
17:17
[SPEAKER_02]: I knew that I needed to work out again.
17:19
[SPEAKER_02]: But I also knew that going back to Beachbody wasn't the answer.
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[SPEAKER_02]: I knew that I would need a community to help keep me accountable of real people, not someone trying to sell me stuff.
17:32
[SPEAKER_00]: And you were, were you actively doing anything at that time?
17:36
[SPEAKER_00]: I think you already answered.
17:37
[SPEAKER_00]: I think you said no, but were you like walking or doing Beachbody at that time?
17:42
[SPEAKER_02]: I wasn't doing beach body at that time.
17:44
[SPEAKER_02]: I would periodically be at the gym, but it was nothing consistent.
17:48
[SPEAKER_02]: If anything, I would walk a lot.
17:52
[SPEAKER_02]: I probably get like 15,000 steps in a day.
17:55
[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, working on your feet all day in the kitchen, you get a lot of steps, but other than that, I would always feel just so exhausted by the end of the day.
18:05
[SPEAKER_02]: I didn't even wanna go to the gym.
18:07
[SPEAKER_00]: What have you because you mentioned Beachbody like what else had you tried from that period of like when you got out to like when we met had you tried any shakes or pills or program or anything?
18:20
[SPEAKER_00]: because that speaks to people listening because that's where a lot of people listening are at right now.
18:25
[SPEAKER_00]: They're trying something right now to see if that's the answer.
18:29
[SPEAKER_02]: I have tried the fat birding pills.
18:32
[SPEAKER_02]: All that did was give me heart palpitations.
18:34
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I did beach body for the first three kids and it worked then in my 20s.
18:44
[SPEAKER_02]: It worked then.
18:45
[SPEAKER_02]: But I also didn't have all the other stressors that I had at this moment in life and with my fourth one, the only thing I had really started was just walking because we had moved into a new town when she was two weeks old.
19:00
[SPEAKER_02]: My husband started a new job.
19:03
[SPEAKER_02]: So I'm two weeks postpartum with four kids trying to get one set up for school.
19:08
[SPEAKER_02]: The other, all three of the others have to stay at home while I'm trying to unpack the house, set it up.
19:15
[SPEAKER_02]: And it's only like a 12,000 square foot house for all six of us.
19:19
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh my god, no wonder you found me and you were like, help?
19:24
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I don't, I don't know what I'm doing anymore, I'm just...
19:29
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, so we talked, we got on the phone and I'm like, yeah, you need to come in and join.
19:34
[SPEAKER_00]: What was your experience in the beginning?
19:36
[SPEAKER_00]: Because Stephanie's story, you guys kind of has like...
19:39
[SPEAKER_00]: It's kind of got two parts to it because she became a client in our group setting, busy to bond, where it's accountability, we're working together.
19:46
[SPEAKER_00]: We're all doing the same workouts on the app.
19:48
[SPEAKER_00]: We're meeting for team calls in yoga and like we're together.
19:52
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I also do the one-on-one coaching and Stephanie, how long were you with us in busy to bond before you jumped to the one-on-one coaching?
19:59
[SPEAKER_00]: Because I love these two parts of your journey because you had success.
20:02
[SPEAKER_00]: You were doing it.
20:03
[SPEAKER_00]: And that, interestingly, you had more success,
20:08
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, tell me about the first half for you and what you learned and what you experienced.
20:13
[SPEAKER_02]: So before I started one-on-one, I had been with Obama for two years.
20:20
[SPEAKER_02]: And that two years was absolutely necessary because it was laying down the foundations of learning again how basic we need for our workouts.
20:33
[SPEAKER_02]: And just the simple form of a bicep curl or a squat.
20:39
[SPEAKER_02]: And then there was nutrition.
20:41
[SPEAKER_02]: I had to relearn everything about food
20:50
[SPEAKER_02]: that someone giving me a menu and saying, okay, you need to eat this, this and this, and that's it, and you're going to lose weight.
20:58
[SPEAKER_02]: Someone handing me the answer isn't actually it.
21:03
[SPEAKER_02]: I had to figure out what worked for me in my life and how my body works.
21:09
[SPEAKER_02]: So I remember when I had first joined, we were actually going into that's like a girl, notebook.
21:17
[SPEAKER_02]: And I had taken that just completely to heart and really died into it and learned everything I absolutely could.
21:26
[SPEAKER_02]: It's a book all about fasting for women.
21:27
[SPEAKER_02]: Those of you that don't know, fast like, oh, my gosh, you book, love that amazing.
21:32
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, what drove me to it was because of the hormonal imbalance that I had and I was looking more at it with the fasting for banning out my hormones and losing weight was just a plus at that point of time.
21:48
[SPEAKER_00]: though.
21:49
[SPEAKER_00]: And you had lost during that first half.
21:51
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, you were down.
21:52
[SPEAKER_00]: What 10 pounds 10 plus pounds during the beginning?
21:55
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
21:56
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
21:56
[SPEAKER_00]: The first we'll call this for phase one.
21:58
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, journey about I think the most I had lost was 15 at the peak of it.
22:04
[SPEAKER_02]: Yes.
22:04
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
22:05
[SPEAKER_00]: you're right.
22:05
[SPEAKER_00]: I remember looking at that just the other day and I'm so glad that you said that that like the first half and being a part of Obama was so necessary of like laying that foundation because so many people come into the group and they don't realize they don't know what they don't know.
22:21
[SPEAKER_00]: They don't realize like they don't really know how to eat.
22:24
[SPEAKER_00]: They don't even really know what they like.
22:25
[SPEAKER_00]: so many people have been just told what to do in the past.
22:28
[SPEAKER_00]: They don't know how important strength training is.
22:31
[SPEAKER_00]: And they're just like, oh, sweet, we're going to do workouts.
22:33
[SPEAKER_00]: Give me the workouts, and I'll just do the workouts and do what you tell me.
22:36
[SPEAKER_00]: And they don't realize how important it is to like, oh, no, you actually need to learn how to curl and you actually need to learn how to squat and you need to learn to do this over and over again.
22:48
[SPEAKER_00]: And so good that you did great last week, but you need to do that same success and do great again next week.
22:54
[SPEAKER_00]: and it's such a slow process.
22:56
[SPEAKER_00]: I've been doing so many episodes on like speed and why we stop and like instant gratification and it's, it really is such a slow process.
23:05
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm sure people are listening going, wait, what did they say that she lost like 15 pounds in two years?
23:10
[SPEAKER_00]: I can take a shot and lose that in two weeks.
23:13
[SPEAKER_02]: Yep, it was a journey though, like there was a lot happening in that two years.
23:18
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh my god.
23:19
[SPEAKER_02]: And I was as much bad that had happened.
23:24
[SPEAKER_02]: I still wouldn't trade it because of the knowledge that I gained from what I learned right.
23:30
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, that's that you up for success right now.
23:32
[SPEAKER_00]: And what you're having right now.
23:33
[SPEAKER_00]: Absolutely.
23:34
[SPEAKER_00]: I go live in the group and then I always suggest that like you guys can go live too.
23:39
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, that's why we keep it on Facebook.
23:41
[SPEAKER_00]: We run our group off Facebook because we can go live.
23:43
[SPEAKER_00]: We could post videos, we can keep it private.
23:45
[SPEAKER_00]: Like, yeah, I've been tempted to take it off and move to another platform.
23:48
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm like, man, this is just a really does offer everything we can.
23:51
[SPEAKER_00]: And there are so many live stuff that I can remember that you did on your front porch, just talking through
23:59
[SPEAKER_00]: I should with your kids are your parents or things that we're going on in your marriage and like stopping and those lives that you would do on command and you'd be brutally honest.
24:08
[SPEAKER_00]: I was like, oh my god, this girl has she's on her way.
24:10
[SPEAKER_00]: She's so much potential.
24:12
[SPEAKER_00]: This is just the beginning because it showed me that you were stopping, pausing, thinking, being honest, putting it out there, not dealing with the shit on your own.
24:23
[SPEAKER_00]: and trusting me, trusting the group to tell your story.
24:26
[SPEAKER_00]: And that was like really big aha moments for me and seeing something in you that I was like, she's got it.
24:32
[SPEAKER_00]: She can go away further than where she's at right now.
24:35
[SPEAKER_02]: Yep.
24:36
[SPEAKER_02]: I honestly like using that feature on Facebook with the group because it was private when I was in those early stages of going through everything with my mental state, whether I was having really bad anxiety
24:52
[SPEAKER_02]: anything that I was feeling that I would just usually run to food.
24:57
[SPEAKER_02]: I would hop on the live on the Facebook group and I would tell everybody.
25:03
[SPEAKER_02]: That way I was holding myself accountable and showing everybody else like, hey, you're not alone.
25:10
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm also going through this too.
25:11
[SPEAKER_02]: And I know food isn't the answer because all it's doing is making me bigger and honestly feeling like crap.
25:21
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I want to fast forward a little bit because it's it's all intertwined, but that's how I have even one on one coaching now.
25:30
[SPEAKER_02]: Let's say it's February.
25:31
[SPEAKER_00]: So eight months, seven, eight months.
25:34
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, I was going to, that was my guess was seven.
25:37
[SPEAKER_00]: So now Stephanie took steps almost a year ago, but so over a little over half of a year, we've been doing this.
25:45
[SPEAKER_00]: And I do a fit-mind coaching program and that's one-on-one, where we're like, every day we're like this.
25:53
[SPEAKER_00]: We talk once a week to on the phone, but the communication really happens like daily and staying on top of workouts, adding workouts, customizing workouts, like adding in things and two day you guys, can we say you're wait?
26:05
[SPEAKER_00]: Can we say how much you've lost and dropped?
26:07
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, absolutely, okay.
26:09
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, so Stephanie went from one 757 to current day 146.
26:13
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like holy shit and she's down from the beginning almost 10% body fat.
26:20
[SPEAKER_00]: Yep, that is in Zelene and I know people are probably wondering because you had success in the beginning the first half and then you were like, I want more.
26:30
[SPEAKER_00]: What was that moment where you were like, I need to do one on one coaching.
26:33
[SPEAKER_00]: I think I can go further than this.
26:36
[SPEAKER_02]: So actually that was that moment happened right after I had completed a really big moment on cycling.
26:44
[SPEAKER_02]: I had just done my second century and I was I weighed in at like between 165 and 170.
26:51
[SPEAKER_02]: after training to ride my bike for 100 miles in a single day, which and I had completed it.
26:58
[SPEAKER_02]: I did it.
26:58
[SPEAKER_02]: I felt like a badass for doing it, but it just put the weight back on me.
27:03
[SPEAKER_02]: It didn't actually take it off.
27:04
[SPEAKER_00]: Why do you think that is?
27:06
[SPEAKER_00]: Because I'm sure people are listening going, wait, why you're burning so many calories and you're being active.
27:10
[SPEAKER_00]: I spin.
27:11
[SPEAKER_00]: Hold on, what'd she say?
27:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Uh-huh.
27:13
[SPEAKER_02]: I could sit there and burn a thousand calories for a morning ride, but that also meant I had to eat a thousand calories because those kind of rides you can't go out thinking, I'll go and get like this kind of deficit.
27:25
[SPEAKER_02]: That is exactly how you actually get yourself hurt your body's going to start burning muscle and you can get really sick like that.
27:32
[SPEAKER_02]: So you can't actually be in a deficit when you do something extreme like that.
27:36
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
27:37
[SPEAKER_00]: Yep.
27:38
[SPEAKER_00]: And what was the, okay, so I, I've, like, kind of interrupted you because you're, I like I did ask about that.
27:44
[SPEAKER_00]: Like, what was that moment though for you back to my original question of like, I think I want to do one I'm on coaching.
27:50
[SPEAKER_00]: Like, like, was there something off that you realize where you like, I feel like I'm plateauing?
27:56
[SPEAKER_00]: I need to be pushed more like what was like that switch that went off and was like, no, fuck it.
28:00
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm doing this.
28:01
[SPEAKER_00]: This is this is what I need to do next.
28:03
[SPEAKER_02]: I could tell that there was a mental block and food was still connected to it.
28:08
[SPEAKER_02]: I actually was using my training for my century as an excuse to go back and eat my food.
28:15
[SPEAKER_02]: Love that you just said that.
28:17
[SPEAKER_02]: It's, I don't think it's, it's so many cards.
28:20
[SPEAKER_02]: Yep.
28:20
[SPEAKER_02]: So like a ridiculous amount like 500 grams of carbs in a day, you got to eat that every day a week before the actual ride.
28:29
[SPEAKER_02]: So you're just sitting there stuffing your face.
28:31
[SPEAKER_02]: And for some people, that's just what makes them happy is sick to me is that it's found like I can't believe that's what made me happy.
28:41
[SPEAKER_00]: Hey, Bond Life fam, I have a question for you.
28:43
[SPEAKER_00]: Are you the kind of person who crushes it at work?
28:45
[SPEAKER_00]: Shows up for your family, checks off every to-do list.
28:48
[SPEAKER_00]: But when it comes to your fitness, your energy and your confidence, it feels like something's missing.
28:52
[SPEAKER_00]: You might be doing the workouts listening to all the right podcasts.
28:55
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, you are listening to this one.
28:57
[SPEAKER_00]: But deep down, you know you're just kind of going through the motions, and you're done playing small in this area of life.
29:02
[SPEAKER_00]: That's exactly why I created FitMine Coaching, my private one-on-one program for high-achieving women and men who are ready to level up.
29:09
[SPEAKER_00]: This isn't just another fitness plan, this is about building the body and the mindset to match the life you're working so damn hard for.
29:16
[SPEAKER_00]: And because success in business means nothing if you're hiding in hoodies avoiding mirrors or dragging through your day was your energy.
29:22
[SPEAKER_00]: 4.
29:23
[SPEAKER_00]: Showing up on Zoom meetings feeling good from the chest up, but praying no one ever sees what's going on below the screen.
29:28
[SPEAKER_00]: We're talking about fat loss, muscle building, and real confidence that bleeds into every area of your life.
29:34
[SPEAKER_00]: Your boredom, your bedroom, and your parenting.
29:36
[SPEAKER_00]: You want it all?
29:37
[SPEAKER_00]: Good.
29:37
[SPEAKER_00]: You should have it all.
29:38
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's go.
29:39
[SPEAKER_00]: Click the link in the show notes and book your free call with me today.
29:46
[SPEAKER_00]: you're ready for more and I'm ready to show you how back to the show.
29:50
[SPEAKER_00]: I remember that so clear and you're right, you had like these goals.
29:55
[SPEAKER_00]: This was happening and I remember noticing too like there's a disconnect.
29:59
[SPEAKER_00]: There's more here that we're not uncovering and then she's like, I'm doing this and you're like, I'm going to find a way to pay for it.
30:07
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to like make this should happen no matter what
30:12
[SPEAKER_00]: You have been one of the greatest success stories, and I think that is because you stuck with it.
30:19
[SPEAKER_00]: You have gone through so many ups and downs with family and marriage and kids and things with school and I mean, you need injuries.
30:29
[SPEAKER_00]: Like you name it.
30:29
[SPEAKER_00]: It's been thrown at you.
30:31
[SPEAKER_00]: But you have found a way to keep going.
30:34
[SPEAKER_00]: You have continued to push that bolder no matter what
30:42
[SPEAKER_02]: That might have been all that news.
30:43
[SPEAKER_00]: We learned I have crying session, but tip and minute, but I learned, well, it might have been two of like, you going, oh shit, what did I just ate this Melissa and like having to be completely honest of those time I want to tell you a week and did want to tell me.
30:58
[SPEAKER_02]: Did not.
30:58
[SPEAKER_02]: I remember going on box there and saying, I don't want to tell you this because I'm disgusted with myself, but I'm going to tell you because we're doing one-on-one and what's the point of paying for this if I'm not going to do the work?
31:12
[SPEAKER_02]: no more high.
31:13
[SPEAKER_02]: I want to see results.
31:14
[SPEAKER_02]: So I need to do the work.
31:15
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, you can't hide or do it on on one.
31:19
[SPEAKER_00]: There's no hiding and unfortunately a lot of people aren't ready for that and they may never be ready for that.
31:24
[SPEAKER_00]: But the changes that we made physically to with your workouts, talk about that, talk about your workouts prior.
31:32
[SPEAKER_00]: What they looked like, how they felt, what you were doing, like, what did they look like and what did you really learn?
31:37
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm a little bit opposite than most clientele.
31:41
[SPEAKER_02]: Yes, she is.
31:43
[SPEAKER_00]: I already know what you're good to say.
31:46
[SPEAKER_02]: Like I said, I'm very all or nothing.
31:48
[SPEAKER_02]: It's something we're working on.
31:50
[SPEAKER_02]: In my mind, it was always like, okay, she says here eight to 12 reps. All right, I've got a 50 pound dumbbell.
31:58
[SPEAKER_02]: We're going to do a two-month squat.
31:59
[SPEAKER_02]: I got 14 reps.
32:00
[SPEAKER_02]: Okay, that means I can go up and wait.
32:03
[SPEAKER_02]: And I would find myself all the way up to the 100 pound dumbbell just going up and down and when I actually stopped and took time to send the less of video or post it to the group there was always one consistent thing that we were told and when I slow down I couldn't list that 100 pound dumbbell for as many rats.
32:22
[SPEAKER_02]: And I had to go back down and wait, and I actually found that when I stopped trying to push my body for his heavy of weight is possible that I could lift and I slowed down and watched myself in the mirror in the contraction with the mind and muscle connection, I actually got better definition and growth in my muscles, yeah, then when I was lifting the heavy stuff.
32:46
[SPEAKER_00]: Yep, and Stephanie's one of those people that I have for him remind and give the the notice all the time of like just because you can doesn't mean you should, you know, just because you're capable of it, because Stephanie's strong is fuck.
32:59
[SPEAKER_00]: You guys should see her legs and she's got to really see her power recently too.
33:03
[SPEAKER_00]: Like I think you've always known that you've been physically like muscular or strong like in there.
33:08
[SPEAKER_00]: And now it gets to show and now it gets to come out, but
33:13
[SPEAKER_00]: everyone thinks like oh well I can do this much weight or you know I can do these many reps and it doesn't mean you should and it always again it takes that pause when it comes to your weight training of like really asking yourself like oh well I got through 14 does that mean I need to go up does that mean I need to go down does that mean I need to slow down and everyone just is so busy to just get okay well that was a set that was a set I just did what it told me to do and you were someone that really stopped and started to think about it
33:43
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, what do I need to do to get the most out of this move?
33:48
[SPEAKER_00]: What is going to get me the results?
33:50
[SPEAKER_00]: Your gym journey has been really cool.
33:53
[SPEAKER_00]: Then I'm like, let's add another leg day in.
33:56
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, I'm so happy with your three leg days now.
33:58
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, I go.
33:59
[SPEAKER_00]: You're totally a psycho now.
34:01
[SPEAKER_00]: Like who wants to do like at a three days in a row?
34:05
[SPEAKER_00]: What else did you realize on this journey with physical stuff?
34:09
[SPEAKER_00]: Like in the weight room?
34:10
[SPEAKER_00]: What was another big thing for you?
34:12
[SPEAKER_00]: Because it's it's been such a massive part.
34:15
[SPEAKER_00]: How much time it takes?
34:16
[SPEAKER_00]: The talk about the conversation that we have in the group.
34:18
[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes with other people that are like, I don't know time to get to hours.
34:23
[SPEAKER_02]: I would say, yeah, the other thing I learned with the gym is the amount of time that it takes, yeah, to actually get those results every day, you may like zero time, minute, yeah, the gym, your feet aren't in the, yeah, every single day, I'm in the gym, a minimum, absolute minimum and just being my shortest workout during the week is an hour and a half agree that.
34:47
[SPEAKER_02]: Like, that's usually my lighter day.
34:49
[SPEAKER_02]: That's my day where like, oh, you know what, I'm going to end up meeting the go and walk a little bit extra today because today's workout.
34:57
[SPEAKER_02]: We're not going to do as much, but we're going to work on it.
34:59
[SPEAKER_02]: We're going to absolutely kill it.
35:00
[SPEAKER_02]: We're still going to, we're going to sit there and we're going to contract those muscles.
35:03
[SPEAKER_02]: But typically, my leg days all three of them, they're always two hours long.
35:09
[SPEAKER_02]: Sometimes they get pushed up to two hours 20 minutes.
35:12
[SPEAKER_02]: And I'm completely fine with that.
35:13
[SPEAKER_02]: My life is goes around my workouts.
35:17
[SPEAKER_02]: I plan on everything around it.
35:18
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
35:19
[SPEAKER_00]: Same.
35:19
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm just creating you to be a little minion of me.
35:23
[SPEAKER_02]: My evil plan is working.
35:25
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, to be worse.
35:25
[SPEAKER_02]: Thanks.
35:26
[SPEAKER_00]: So I did you used to work out like say like more than the beginning of like when you did work started working out and you're going to the gym.
35:33
[SPEAKER_00]: How much time did you spend that to your member compared to now like that period of time right before Obama.
35:39
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and even in the beginning, Obama, and that season, I would say probably about an hour, 45 minutes to an hour.
35:47
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, it's going to piss a lot of people off hearing you say that you work out minimum hour and a half.
35:53
[SPEAKER_00]: You know how many people are going to like pry right into the show or listen to this and just be like, I don't have that time.
35:58
[SPEAKER_00]: That's not possible.
35:59
[SPEAKER_00]: Like, no, that's not right.
36:01
[SPEAKER_00]: It triggers people a lot.
36:02
[SPEAKER_00]: I just put out a real.
36:03
[SPEAKER_00]: We talked about in the team call and I said, like, I love my two hours in the gym.
36:07
[SPEAKER_00]: It's my hot real time.
36:08
[SPEAKER_00]: Like it's my type being here and like my music.
36:10
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not with kids.
36:11
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't have to do anything.
36:12
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm just it's my hot real time.
36:14
[SPEAKER_00]: Like I get to be hot during this time.
36:15
[SPEAKER_00]: We're about hotness.
36:16
[SPEAKER_00]: They missed all the other parts and the only thing people focused on was that I said, I'm in the gym for two hours.
36:22
[SPEAKER_00]: And Facebook I got a lot of comments people were saying that that's really conceited it's like, how can you possibly expect other people to I'm like, what do you think I have time to go with the gym?
36:33
[SPEAKER_00]: Are you kidding me?
36:34
[SPEAKER_00]: I make it time out of time to be here.
36:36
[SPEAKER_02]: It aired up coming down to how much are you willing to put into yourself.
36:41
[SPEAKER_02]: If you're not willing to put in that work, you're not going to get the results that you're asking for.
36:47
[SPEAKER_02]: You want 90 percent results, but you're only going to put in 40 percent, you're honestly going to get 40 percent results, not 90.
36:55
[SPEAKER_00]: Yep, we can sit here and talk about Jim stuff like you and I could probably talk about Jim stuff for like hours.
37:02
[SPEAKER_00]: I want people to know the other biggest thing that helped you and if no one, if you guys haven't listened before, you don't follow me on Instagram or whatever, I wasn't used the term cracking the code because you can be doing and doing and doing things and get some results, but like you have a crack that code yet where your body just like starts to unleash and like you have a good way in and you have another good one and then
37:24
[SPEAKER_00]: And then you stay the same, but then you have another one in trending numbers are down and then muscle is going up.
37:30
[SPEAKER_00]: But that's when you're like, that's what I crack the code.
37:33
[SPEAKER_00]: There's so many other things that played into your journey with cracking the code.
37:37
[SPEAKER_00]: We can talk about working out, we can talk about nutrition, the food noise, things like that, what was the other biggest thing for you that made that switch just flip in turn on Beast Mode Stephanie?
37:50
[SPEAKER_02]: I don't know if everybody's going to understand this terminology, but working on little Stephanie and healing her was the biggest shift and understanding why I do the things I do as that, that happened because before you, I wouldn't really think about why I did it.
38:11
[SPEAKER_02]: It was just automatic.
38:12
[SPEAKER_02]: I just did it.
38:12
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, this happened.
38:13
[SPEAKER_02]: So now I need to do this.
38:15
[SPEAKER_02]: You don't think why, you know, I wasn't stopping and thinking in those moment and when Melissa and I would have those calls with one on one, those calls get real.
38:26
[SPEAKER_02]: So you better be ready if you're on them, they're a lot of your tears on my calls.
38:30
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
38:31
[SPEAKER_02]: I want to say like one of the big moments and this was early on in our one and one was we were trying to we were talking about my food noise and figuring out like okay why are we running to food whenever there's conflict and either like between you and your parents or you and your husband or your kids are just really getting under your skin that day and it clips I don't know why but it's just
38:56
[SPEAKER_02]: for that moment.
38:57
[SPEAKER_02]: When I was small and growing up, when my parents would have a conflict, a disagreement, an argument, they weren't very loud, but you could tell they were disagreeing, and my mother was upset, we would go to Arby's or Burger King, and we would go and just get fries and pies.
39:14
[SPEAKER_02]: We would get that little cardboard triangle of a Hershey's or Reese's Pie, and then a large thing of fries, and then we would sit in the parking lot,
39:26
[SPEAKER_02]: And then, as a kid, I'm just thinking, oh, mom's taking us out.
39:30
[SPEAKER_02]: We're going to go have some yummy food.
39:33
[SPEAKER_02]: You don't realize that your brain is actually making the connection subconsciously that, oh, there's conflict.
39:42
[SPEAKER_02]: The adult is saying food makes it better.
39:45
[SPEAKER_02]: And so when I grew up without even realizing it, those connections were already made.
39:50
[SPEAKER_00]: I'll never forget that one phone call we had, where I think you had eaten something, or I don't know, there was something there, and I was like, okay, why?
40:00
[SPEAKER_00]: This isn't like a week moment, this is like why I was just hungry, or I'm on my period, I'm creating sugar, like where did this come from?
40:07
[SPEAKER_00]: What happened before that event?
40:09
[SPEAKER_00]: What were you feeling then?
40:10
[SPEAKER_00]: And I think that was the time where we made like the biggest connection of like, look at what food offers you, look at what your brain has been trained
40:21
[SPEAKER_00]: Yep.
40:22
[SPEAKER_00]: This happens, something someone's upset, this is going to come for you.
40:26
[SPEAKER_00]: It's going to make it all better.
40:28
[SPEAKER_00]: This is a BFF bandade that's going to like go on here.
40:32
[SPEAKER_00]: And then that happens to us as a kid.
40:34
[SPEAKER_00]: We don't think about it.
40:34
[SPEAKER_00]: And then it shows up.
40:37
[SPEAKER_00]: And this can happen to with people, I mean, with alcohol, with how they're triggered, how they respond to things, something that they learned as a child, and then it happens now, and they fly off the handle because they were triggered, or they're like, well, I need this to go away.
40:52
[SPEAKER_00]: So I'm going to just turn to alcohol, or drugs are getting high.
40:56
[SPEAKER_00]: Like, there I see so many different things that people become just so used to, that they use to cope, and food, especially for women, is a big one.
41:07
[SPEAKER_00]: food, yes food.
41:09
[SPEAKER_02]: I will say one of the other things that really changed.
41:13
[SPEAKER_02]: Whenever we had really dialed in on the food noise and overeating was, I wasn't beating myself up mentally internally and not trying to convince myself that I needed to go and do this extra cardio to burn off those extra calories and do all this extra because I did this to make up for everything.
41:35
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
41:36
[SPEAKER_02]: That just beats you up even more.
41:39
[SPEAKER_00]: I have to bring this up too because I don't want people to think that I want to say the word here.
41:45
[SPEAKER_00]: You don't ever really care.
41:47
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know if you ever completely heal from all of these things.
41:51
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't think that they ever go away.
41:52
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, once something's like burned inside of you and as a child, like,
41:57
[SPEAKER_00]: it's just who you are and we always talk about the bus right we all have this bus we're all driving it and there's all these different seats and and and the eight-year-old Stephanie that's going to like fuck shit up and she runs up and gets in the driver seat we don't take her and kick her out you know we don't take her and throw her out the door we just put her back in her seat because she's she's part of you she's who made you you today
42:19
[SPEAKER_00]: And with that being said, I want everyone, because I'm very honest about my own journeys, and my own mental health and me being in therapy and things that I've gone through, it's not that you cure it.
42:30
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not that it ever goes away, but you learn how to pause and not let what happened in your life drive your bus.
42:38
[SPEAKER_00]: That version of you, whatever age that is in the
42:44
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, this person's the driver seat.
42:46
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to take them.
42:47
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to remove them and put adult me in there and I'm going to think about what just happened because things are still going to bother you things are still going to trigger you know that like I said it burned in us and that's one thing that you have just become so successful at is like going okay hold on hold on this is what I'm feeling that this is the sadness I'm feeling this is the happiness this is like whatever that is for you and you've learned how to pause and
43:12
[SPEAKER_00]: and be like, okay, I want this.
43:14
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, do I really want to do this?
43:16
[SPEAKER_00]: I really want to say this, but I'm not going to because I know that it's 13 year old man the driver seat right now.
43:22
[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, absolutely 13 year old Stephanie was so petty.
43:25
[SPEAKER_02]: I mean, I still to this day get all those thoughts pop up in my mind when someone says anything to me and I want to be petty about it pops up in my mind.
43:36
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm like, no, that's 13 year old Stephanie adult Stephanie is going to handle it like this.
43:40
[SPEAKER_02]: I'm sure absolutely.
43:43
[SPEAKER_00]: What do you find right now is one of the biggest things that you're like still working on or not still working on but like a new thing has like what's the most recent thing for you that you're like this is what I'm tackling right now because this shifts and I want people to see that like you work through one thing then there's a new thing and that's life it doesn't just all end.
44:04
[SPEAKER_02]: The most recent thing and it's actually really, really big for me is identifying that so many of those things from when I was small and that's what was driving my bus and that's how I was living was actually just me learning to survive in life and now I'm learning how to thrive in life where adult Stephanie is in the driver seat more often than little Stephanie.
44:29
[SPEAKER_02]: and identifying what that survival versus thriving looks like.
44:36
[SPEAKER_02]: And then making it more consistent, making plans ahead of time, making a meal plan, going ahead and making sure the kids are all set up for this at school and not leaving everything last minute.
44:50
[SPEAKER_02]: be having more open communication with my husband because this is a touchy subject.
44:56
[SPEAKER_02]: Guess what, he's not my father who I have the issues with.
45:01
[SPEAKER_02]: So we don't want to take those issues and put it on the husband, right?
45:06
[SPEAKER_02]: He's a completely different person.
45:07
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh, just so proud of you.
45:10
[SPEAKER_00]: But it's true, and that's one of the biggest things of helping move from surviving to thriving is having a plan.
45:17
[SPEAKER_00]: Because when you're just surviving, you just go by the seam of your pants and you're just like, okay, well, this is what I'm just gonna do.
45:23
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, I didn't make time or I didn't plan this out.
45:25
[SPEAKER_00]: So now I'm just gonna rush this workout or I'm just gonna go through this drive through.
45:28
[SPEAKER_00]: We're just gonna get that.
45:30
[SPEAKER_00]: And yeah, you have a lot of things mapped out.
45:33
[SPEAKER_00]: I wake up every morning you guys and I start texting and I'm like, hey, what's the game plan today?
45:38
[SPEAKER_00]: And a lot of the time, it's like boring.
45:40
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like, oh, there's Melissa.
45:41
[SPEAKER_00]: She wants no one to go into the gym.
45:42
[SPEAKER_00]: And let all do they realize that I am every day forcing their brain to think about what they are doing that day and next.
45:51
[SPEAKER_00]: Because in it takes a long time.
45:54
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't want to say years, but it kind of takes years to get that in their head and make it stick.
45:59
[SPEAKER_00]: And then once that has to go,
46:00
[SPEAKER_00]: habit is stock like okay yeah this is what i'm going to the gym i plan that last night this is what my day is gonna look like or i plan this this morning and then the next time is like the execution okay so how now do we make that plan turn out incredible how do we stick to the plan make it turn out incredible and then it turns into like how do we keep this plan going now that life is changing because while you're making habits while you're making the stick and executing the time
46:25
[SPEAKER_00]: Life is taking place, kids being older, sports are changing, relationships are changing, you know, and it's so great to have blinders on it and just be like, no, work I'll be, you know, be strong, be fit, but you know, realize like, oh, shit, life is changing too, and what's working this year might not work next year.
46:44
[SPEAKER_02]: Exactly.
46:45
[SPEAKER_02]: Correct.
46:46
[SPEAKER_02]: So, man, I have, like, we said in the beginning, like, I have four kids.
46:51
[SPEAKER_02]: And they're, they're not older kids.
46:53
[SPEAKER_02]: I've got kids that are five, seven, eight and ten.
46:56
[SPEAKER_02]: So who are all?
46:58
[SPEAKER_02]: They're very, very close and age and their best friends with each other, but they also love terrorizing each other.
47:05
[SPEAKER_02]: So it's definitely something you have to like just stay right on top of.
47:10
[UNKNOWN]: Yeah.
47:10
[SPEAKER_02]: And this is my first year at all four of them going to public school.
47:14
[SPEAKER_02]: So I do now have, you know, a little bit extra time, but I have found that whenever you have something so busy like that, whether it's a job or having just an excessive amount of time that you need to spend with the kids have a backup plan for your work.
47:30
[SPEAKER_02]: I have a backup plan every single day.
47:33
[SPEAKER_02]: If my first date or my first time for the gym doesn't work out, I always have a backup plan because it's not an option to not go to the gym unless I am physically ill.
47:46
[SPEAKER_02]: That's about the only time I don't go.
47:48
[SPEAKER_00]: It's so funny here you say that because I see that and I know that and I'm like, yes, that then again, my evil plan is working and it's so funny because like the person you were when you first joined like that was not you.
47:59
[SPEAKER_00]: Like I think it's so important for people listening to understand that that like this is a new you.
48:04
[SPEAKER_00]: You did not draw up like this just because you were in the military did not make you like this.
48:08
[SPEAKER_00]: You were not that disciplined as you are now.
48:10
[SPEAKER_02]: I got a very
48:12
[SPEAKER_02]: negative relationship with working out when it can't, with the military because they made it such a, a negative thing telling you I was always overweight and mind you, I had a 34 inch waist when they told me I was overweight.
48:29
[SPEAKER_00]: unbelievable.
48:30
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
48:30
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, you've come a long way again.
48:32
[SPEAKER_00]: I feel like we could just talk for hours about your journey and what you've learned and go back and forth and we definitely have to have you on again.
48:39
[SPEAKER_00]: Like because now that we know you're journeyed who you are, like I think you should come back on again and we can talk about like what we see and what we can change it.
48:48
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know there's so many other topics that we can cover.
48:51
[SPEAKER_00]: But before you go like what's one thing that you
48:58
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe she is working out, gotten maybe some success, you know, maybe she's lost 10 pounds too over the last several years or something, but she's not where she wants to be.
49:08
[SPEAKER_00]: She's listening going, yeah, I haven't figured out how to crack that code.
49:12
[SPEAKER_00]: I haven't figured out what would you say to her, someone that's kind of like stuck in on the fence.
49:17
[SPEAKER_02]: I would say that
49:19
[SPEAKER_02]: You're only gonna go as far as your worst habit allows you.
49:23
[SPEAKER_02]: So you can go to the gym and work out every single day.
49:26
[SPEAKER_02]: But if you feel like you deserve the treat every single day after the gym and you stop by, you get, let's say, like, three cupcakes from a bakery every single day.
49:36
[SPEAKER_02]: That's, you're only gonna go so far.
49:39
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, or alcohol.
49:41
[SPEAKER_00]: I, or I get out at a lot, people will be like, we just salary.
49:45
[SPEAKER_00]: We just drink on Fridays and Saturdays.
49:48
[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, did boundaries and walls around that?
49:50
[SPEAKER_00]: Sure.
49:50
[SPEAKER_00]: You have no how much you're going to have sure.
49:52
[SPEAKER_00]: But that's your worst habit.
49:55
[SPEAKER_00]: you drink every week, you now use alcohol to chill out or relax or hang with your husband or your wife.
50:02
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's not something that's hoping you get better.
50:05
[SPEAKER_00]: Yep.
50:06
[SPEAKER_00]: I see that a lot with alcohol, but it was worth it.
50:09
[SPEAKER_02]: I get it mostly and I'm sure the listeners can pick up on this is I personally did it mostly with food and sweet and at the beginning of bomb bomb like I remember I would have
50:21
[SPEAKER_02]: I would tell myself, oh, I did the one mile walk today and I got the work out in.
50:26
[SPEAKER_02]: And so I think I can have my dessert tonight.
50:29
[SPEAKER_02]: And it was always like a, it was like a biscuit ice cream cone or something like that.
50:34
[SPEAKER_02]: And I was like, I just have one that's it, but they was every night.
50:37
[SPEAKER_02]: And so there's like three or 400 calories right there.
50:42
[SPEAKER_00]: I know.
50:42
[SPEAKER_00]: And when we're trying to cut like we're literally looking at only three or four hundred calories to make a difference.
50:49
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
50:49
[SPEAKER_02]: It's not it's not a crazy amount of calories we're cutting out.
50:52
[SPEAKER_02]: We still want to keep our muscle.
50:54
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah.
50:54
[SPEAKER_00]: And when you look at it like that of like when we're making changes like, okay, we need to create a little bit more of a deficit or like, you know, how, where do we need to tweak things?
51:02
[SPEAKER_00]: You're literally adjusting
51:10
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, and people think like it doesn't matter.
51:13
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just one thing.
51:15
[SPEAKER_00]: It's my one vice.
51:17
[SPEAKER_00]: It's like the in a dye and does matter.
51:20
[SPEAKER_00]: Especially if you're like really on your grind.
51:22
[SPEAKER_00]: If you're really like, no, I want to do this.
51:25
[SPEAKER_00]: And then once you get there, then you get to play with it and learn like what maintenance looks like.
51:29
[SPEAKER_00]: And figure out, how do I keep these habits muscle right here?
51:35
[SPEAKER_00]: This is where like, and that's a whole other journey
51:40
[SPEAKER_00]: So Stephanie, it was so fun to have you on and you definitely have to come back.
51:47
[SPEAKER_00]: Stephanie is she's a big presence in our group and in our coaching.
51:52
[SPEAKER_00]: So if you guys get in there, you will see Stephanie, you will work with her.
51:56
[SPEAKER_00]: You've become such a major like pillar of the group and a leader.
51:59
[SPEAKER_00]: So we're so grateful to have you and I know it's not easy.
52:02
[SPEAKER_00]: Like COVID-19 here in talking and it's like, oh my god.
52:10
[SPEAKER_02]: Hope this reaches someone who is in the spot where I was and is getting this when they need it.
52:17
[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, yeah, I agree.
52:19
[SPEAKER_00]: Yeah, you're awesome.
52:20
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, everyone, please go to the show notes, check out the links.
52:24
[SPEAKER_00]: We're here to help book a call.
52:26
[SPEAKER_00]: You can talk with us email into the show and we'll definitely have Stephanie back on.
52:30
[SPEAKER_00]: So if they hear you again for coming on stuff, okay, I can't wait to see you all with the next chapter holds for you.
52:35
[SPEAKER_00]: Absolutely.
52:36
[SPEAKER_00]: Everyone stays safe.
52:37
[SPEAKER_00]: Stay healthy until next time.
52:42
[SPEAKER_00]: The bottom-life podcast is for informational and entertainment purposes only.
52:44
[SPEAKER_00]: The content shared here is not intended as medical, legal, or professional advice.
52:48
[SPEAKER_00]: Always consult with a qualified professional before making any health fitness, financial, or legal decisions.
52:52
[SPEAKER_00]: The opinions shared on this podcast are personal experiences and insight.
52:56
[SPEAKER_00]: So if you need expert guidance, go find the right professional for you.
53:00
[SPEAKER_00]: Thanks for listening.