Latest / Stories From The Lost and Found: The Journey Back to Self / Imposter Syndrome

Transcript

Imposter Syndrome · Stories From The Lost and Found: The Journey Back to Self

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Stories from the Lost and Found.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Krishna Avalon, subconscious therapist, breakthrough coach, and acupuncturist, someone who spent 24 years helping people change from the inside out.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: I bridge neuroscience and ancient medicine together to show you what's actually driving your life because it's almost never what's on the surface.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: Each week we'll go deep into the patterns, wounded parts, and the real stories behind why we get stuck and how we find our way through.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: If you're ready for honesty, depth, and tools that actually work, you're in the right place.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_00: I am so glad you're here.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: Good morning, everyone, and welcome to Stories from the Lost and Found.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Krishna, and in every solo episode, what I want to offer you is the parts of us that many of us deal with and experience.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to offer these parts from the lenses that I get to guide clients through.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: So namely the subconscious process that I get to utilize called Psyche K.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: So we'll talk about these parts as a subconscious program that's running in the background, uh, creating your entire life.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: We'll also talk about these parts of us through the lens of internal family system.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: And these parts of us were created, usually very young, to help us survive.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_00: So when we start to understand that none of these parts are bad, they were just created to help protect us and help us survive.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: What can happen is we can learn to be with these parts, offer them the witnessing that they need and deserve.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: We can let them know that they're not alone.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: And from this place, things start to shift because this really extreme parts of us that are often uncomfortable.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes we understand them, sometimes we don't, but they can start to relax.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_00: They can soften, they can do what we call unblend and internal family systems, which is a way for them to give you space and maybe even go into a different expression so that you can be more self-led, is what we call it in IFS.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_00: So self is the part of you that's already whole, healed, present, compassionate, loving, wise, courageous, playful.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: And what these parts of us want from us is to feel that self-energy so that they can trust that it's safe for them to relax.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_00: It's safe for them to come out of the imposter syndrome beliefs.
• 2:33
  SPEAKER_00: And then the reason I love to work with a subconscious process as well is oftentimes we'll use IFS in my sessions as a way to go deep into inquiry and to really give these parts of us the witnessing that they need and then transform some subconscious stress around what that part experiences.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: And it's so special.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know anyone else who combines these two modalities, but from what I have seen and witnessed, both in myself and in working with clients for 24 years, is that this is so quick.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: This process is so quick.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_00: So often I will use IFS or Psyche just independently.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: Both are revolutionary from what I find in helping people transform and have the experiences that they're wanting to have in life.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_00: But together it is magical.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: Even for people who are very linear, very skeptical, they've tried so many things and nothing has worked, or maybe it's helped to a certain point, but they still feel stuck and feel like they should be further along.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: These are the processes that I find the world is asking for.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: Even if people don't know that this is what they need or this is what they're asking for, it is the direct path forward.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: And what I want you to know after all of this is that healing does not have to take 20, 34 years.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: Even for the most complicated things, healing can be quick, it can be gentle, it can be easy.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes that's what I get to help people reprogram is that you don't have to earn your happiness.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_00: You don't have to work hard to move forward.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: You've probably already worked hard.
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_00: You just haven't had the right tools.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_00: And for somebody who's known quite a bit of struggle for most of my life, like this is the stuff I wish I had known about sooner.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_00: This is the stuff that would have helped me create without resistance, without so much struggle.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: And what I find is that after these processes, you're just in life with more ease, trusting yourself, feeling safe to be seen, deserving healthy relationships, clear boundaries without any guilt.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: And it's not always this like big, boisterous, like, ah, here I am.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_00: It's often more of like a quiet sitting back in your energy, but so confident without needing to prove.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: You just are.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_00: And at the end of every solo episode, I offer a practice for us to integrate and to be with these parts of us that need our attention because most of us have so much going on and not the time and space that we need to integrate and implement things we might even already know, but we don't need more information.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_00: We need integration.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: And so let's begin.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: So imposter syndrome as a part, it might show up as like you've accomplished real things in your life.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_00: So why doesn't it feel happier for you?
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_00: Why does it feel like you're one mistake away from being found out?
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_00: You got the promotion, the client said yes.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_00: Someone introduced you in a room as an expert in your field, and then people actually turn to listen to you.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_00: But in that moment, sensations happen in your body before the thought even forms, or is a subtle shift, a tightening in your sternum, perhaps, or a holding of your breath, a flush of heat.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe your heart's racing.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_00: For a lot of us, it could be the sense of wanting to crawl into a hole.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_00: And that is the subconscious program.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_00: It's already running before you've had a single conscious thought about what just happened, before gratitude or satisfaction or anything else.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_00: Your subconscious is going to find a flaw in it.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_00: The imposter syndrome as a part, trying to protect you, trying to find what's wrong.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: There's a quiet, persistent background hum.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_00: Something about this isn't quite legitimate.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: You haven't actually earned the room that you're standing in.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_00: Doesn't announce itself.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: It could be slight tightening of the chest.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_00: When someone praises you, when a door opens, when you should feel good.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: You're bracing.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: Like something in you is getting ready to go wrong.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_00: Like there's a glass wall between you and the satisfaction that should be yours.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: You can sense it, and yet you just can't quite touch it.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: Might be flatness.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: The tightening seems to come in exactly the wrong moment.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: And that's not random.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_00: It's the body holding your stories, running the program, the subconscious belief making itself known before your conscious mind even has a chance to form a thought about what just happened.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_00: And it's strange.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_00: You can't point to the evidence that supports any of it.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_00: The results are there.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: The track records are real.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_00: People may keep choosing you, keep trusting you.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_00: And still underneath it, there's a feeling that has just never gone away.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: The waiting, watching for the shoe to drop, bracing.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_00: The subconscious program running underneath your entire experience.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_00: It's creating your life, quietly deciding what you deserve, what's actually yours to have.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: How long before the truth gets exposed about how you're somehow not enough?
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_00: And here's what I want to say before we go any further.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_00: The program is not the truth, it's a very old story.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_00: Often installed very early, maybe even in utero.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: From whatever our mothers processed during our time in utero.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_00: For a lot of us, that's when it started.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_00: But it can be changed, and it can be changed quickly.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: Not by collecting more wins or thinking more positively, not by building a better case or proving your qualifications.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_00: The program is not listening to any of that.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_00: It was written before logic was even available to you.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_00: It's been running underneath every achievement, recognition, every room that you've walked into since.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_00: The subconscious doesn't respond to evidence.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't update when you get the promotion.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't soften when someone tells you what this role needs and why you're perfect for it.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: It does not care about your track record.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: This program was written before your track record, before you had language, before you had a way to question what was being decided, what was running underneath every experience, maybe not loudly or obviously, might be just quietly filtering everything through this original conclusion.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_00: And the approach that most people take, collecting wins, building a better case for legitimacy, trying to think more confidently, pep talk yourself.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: It's a conscious level strategy, but it's aimed at a subconscious level program.
• 10:36
  SPEAKER_00: And this is why many frameworks don't work or they plateau at a certain point.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_00: The subconscious is working, the conscious works on a screen.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_00: Typ in information.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_00: But the subconscious is the hard drive.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_00: That's where all of our programs are stored, and that's where we create 95% of our lives.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_00: So while that conscious keyboard information is very important, the hard drive or the programs are that's where we want to work to create the biggest change.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_00: That's where we do the heavy lifting.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_00: That's why working in the subconscious is the most powerful way to be able to create your life the way you'd like.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_00: And when I say subconscious, often I will see people's eyes glaze over like they believe they're going to be hypnotized or put to sleep or it's going to be difficult or heavy.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_00: And it does not have to be.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_00: Even for deep, dark, painful things, working in the subconscious can be very quick and gentle.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_00: And what I find is that simple is deep and elegant.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: When things are simple and gentle, your system feels safe.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_00: Think of it like that.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_00: Your system can feel safe to relax when it feels gentle.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_00: And what actually creates change is going in two places simultaneously.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_00: So the first is neurological.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_00: The belief underneath imposter syndrome, you can probably guess, I am not enough, or I'm not good enough.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_00: I don't belong here.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: I don't deserve this.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_00: It's not a thought, it's a program.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, it can be a thought too, but the program is the one running the show.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's encoded in the part of the brain that stores those automatic procedural responses.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_00: The subconscious is where our patterns, our behaviors, our beliefs, and our memories are stored.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_00: And that part doesn't have reason, it just runs.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_00: Changing it requires going directly to the subconscious, using the brain's own capacity for neuroplasticity.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_00: Not about managing or talking about things.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_00: You've already talked about it.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_00: You get to rewrite it.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_00: And that's where the process of psych K is magical and special.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_00: There is a lot of neuroscience that backs it.
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_00: It was created by a psychologist.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_00: I don't love the name Psych K, but it stands for psychology and kinesiology.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_00: Kinesiology is a way to muscle test.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_00: So it speaks to your subconscious using your body.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_00: And the reason it works is because you can't lie to the muscles and you can't lie to the subconscious.
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_00: And then we'll talk about parts in internal family system.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_00: Imposter syndrome isn't a belief in IFS, it's a protector part.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_00: A part that developed a very specific job to make sure you never get too comfortable, never stop proving yourself, and never relax fully into the idea that you belong, because from that protector part's perspective, the imposter syndrome, the moment that you do believe you deserve something, you're going to stop watching, stop being prepared.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_00: And that's when everything falls apart.
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_00: But that part of you is not your enemy.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_00: None of your parts are bad.
• 14:22
  SPEAKER_00: The protector part, the imposter syndrome, is one of the most hardworking, vigilant, and very exhausted parts in your system.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's been at this job since you were likely very young.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_00: You didn't even know a job was being assigned.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_00: And it's never even once had a day off.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_00: So think about, just in theory, a three-year-old who had to take on a role of all this responsibility to make sure that you didn't fail, get humiliated, feel ashamed or embarrassed, and how much they've been carrying and feeling alone since you were three years old.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_00: And like, how would you want to respond to a three-year-old that feels alone and incredibly burdened?
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: That's the kind of stuff that we get into in IFS sessions.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_00: And that work is just so beautiful.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_00: So what IFS allows you to do is not override the protector, the imposter syndrome.
• 15:28
  SPEAKER_00: We're not trying to silence it.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: And what we get to do is actually meet it and understand these burdens it's been carrying and validate it.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_00: The parts of us love our witnessing and validation.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_00: They want to know they're not alone.
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_00: And that's an experience they might never have had.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_00: Like how lonely.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_00: How lonely that must be.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_00: How must how terrifying.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_00: So we'll talk about both levels, where the beliefs came from and what they've been quietly running underneath your life, how IFS maps the parts protecting them and what those parts actually need to finally soften.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_00: Psyche works at the neurological level to change the program where it lives, not just where it's visible.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_00: And then at the end of this episode, like I said, with every solo episode, we're going to do a practice.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_00: And these practices really could be done every day.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_00: The more the parts of you get to know you and trust you in what we call your self energy, the more they can soften, relax, unblend.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_00: And again, self is the part of you that's already present, loving, compassionate, wise, playful.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_00: Most conversations or talk therapy might talk about imposter syndrome, but at this conscious level, that's the surface.
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_00: Talk about the behavior, the over-preparing or the second guessing, deflecting the praise.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_00: They may offer strategies for managing it, reframing the thought, collect evidence of your competence, remind you of your wins, but none of that touches the root because the root isn't a thought pattern, it's a subconscious belief.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to name them directly.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_00: So as I name these, notice which ones don't just register intellectually, but actually land somewhere in your body.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_00: I am not good enough.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_00: This is the most foundational one.
• 17:45
  SPEAKER_00: And notice what it doesn't say.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't say, I haven't done enough.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_00: That would be fixable.
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_00: I am not enough.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_00: The insufficiency is in the being, not in the doing.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_00: And this is exactly why doing more never resolves it.
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_00: You can work harder, produce more, achieve more, and the belief simply recalibrates.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_00: The belief was not reasoned into existence, it was absorbed from an environment, a dynamic, a series of moments, reinforcing the program and the imprint.
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_00: I don't belong here.
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_00: And this one intensifies as the stakes rise.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_00: So the bigger the room, the more visible, the more, the bigger the role, the more prestigious the recognition, the louder this belief gets, which is exactly backwards from how it should work.
• 18:43
  SPEAKER_00: And that's exactly how a subconscious program operates.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_00: The belief it carries a texture, it's like a sense of presence in a certain space that you got here maybe through a combination of luck, timing, or other people's generosity.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_00: And that the people who actually belong here are somehow better than you.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_00: And this can often show up as a felt experience rather than a clear thought, contraction when you enter a room full of people.
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_00: You respect a hesitation before speaking in a meeting.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_00: Even when you know exactly what you want to say.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe pull back at the exact moment you're the most visible, as if some part of you is trying to reduce your footprint before someone notices that you've taken up too much space.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_00: So I want you to take a deep breath and just let that part of you be seen right now.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe someone has asked you how you're doing or asks you to share, and you're telling your story, and then all of a sudden you get a sense of like, oh my God, I'm too much, I'm sharing too much.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_00: I'm being seen too much.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_00: You just take a breath and let that part of you know that you see it.
• 20:17
  SPEAKER_00: The next one would be, I don't deserve to be successful.
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_00: And this is the belief that lives underneath the quiet sabotage, not the overt kind, you're not burning things down, it's subtle.
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_00: The opportunities that don't get completed, for instance, the project that sits 90% finished, or the moment where you could have asked for exactly what you wanted, and instead something made you ask for less.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_00: In IFS internal family systems, this would be the exile, the wounded, alone part of you that feels terrified of failing because it'd be embarrassing and shameful.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_00: It's humiliating.
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_00: Feeling is a person.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_00: It's the fear that if the next thing goes wrong, the next project or decision, next time someone looks closely, won't just be a setback.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_00: It'll be the confirmation, the thing everyone, including you, is secretly waiting for.
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_00: Proof that not enough was always true.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_00: That the success would always be just borrowed time.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_00: And the fear doesn't announce itself as fear.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_00: It might show up as perfectionism, as over preparation, maybe the inability to delegate.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_00: Because what if someone else does it wrong and it reflects it on you?
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_00: It's just easier to do it yourself the way you want it done.
• 22:27
  SPEAKER_00: And it's this is the engine underneath all of it, the fear of failing.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_00: The reason that the monitoring, the scanning, the bracing, it never stops.
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_00: And the reason that that goalpost just keeps moving.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_00: No amount of success produces the feeling of being allowed to finally relax.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_00: And that's where the work that I get to guide is so impactful, so powerful, so deep.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_00: The imposter syndrome is a protector part.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_00: In IFS, we have protector parts that are either managers or firefighters.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_00: The managers get a lot of cred in society.
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_00: They are maybe hyper-vigilant, overworking, people-pleasing, uh bossy, maybe even.
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_00: They get a lot of shit done.
• 23:19
  SPEAKER_00: And so they get a lot of cred, but they can show up in like tight shoulders or a migraine or intensity, not being able to relax.
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_00: And they've been in that role for a very long time, usually.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_00: Like imagine responding to a three to five-year-old that has been in this role to help you survive as a strategy.
• 23:42
  SPEAKER_00: Like, how would you respond to that three to five-year-old who has felt all alone and that their responsibilities were to keep you from feeling deeper pain?
• 24:00
  SPEAKER_00: What they're protecting is the exile, the wounded.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_00: And then there are the firefighter protectors, and those are more self-harming.
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_00: Those can be more like numbing or scrolling or spending money eating, doing drugs, drinking alcohol.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_00: When we understand that the parts of us are never bad, none of these parts are bad.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_00: They were just put into their roles to help you survive.
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's their strategy.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_00: And all we're doing in IFS is getting you and yourself energy again, present, compassionate, loving, wise, playful, courageous in relationship to your parts, so that your parts can learn to relax, give you space, and maybe even go into another form of expression.
• 24:51
  SPEAKER_00: When that happens and the protectors relax, then the exile may come up and do what we call unburden.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_00: That's when they get to let go of their fears.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_00: So that is IFS, and IFS creates something so special because most frameworks are teaching us to bypass these uncomfortable parts to make them go away.
• 25:17
  SPEAKER_00: And that doesn't work.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_00: I am a longtime meditator, and even meditation in a way is teaching you to bypass something that is uncomfortable, but you don't really in most types of meditations learn how to be with and witness the parts of you that need your attention.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_00: Often you're trying to transcend those parts.
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_00: So IFS is very special, changes the relationship between self and parts, allows those parts to be witnessed and seen so that they don't feel alone.
• 26:01
  SPEAKER_00: Perhaps in this way.
• 26:14
  SPEAKER_00: In other ways of working with the subconscious, like perhaps hypnotherapy or EMDR.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_00: You might be able to peacefully unattach from a stress, but you don't get to create new programs.
• 26:27
  SPEAKER_00: Psych K allows you to create new subconscious programs.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_00: And the way that it works is it creates what's called a whole brain state.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_00: And there's lots of neuroscience behind this done by EEG research.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_00: What we're doing is creating clear communication between both hemispheres of your brain, the left and the right parts of the cerebral cortex.
• 26:48
  SPEAKER_00: When that happens, you are in such a relaxed state that the subconscious is malleable, it's impressionable.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_00: It's easy to take the new program you want to create and put it in there.
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_00: It's easy in that state to unattach from that stress and go in a new direction.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_00: And this is called neuroplasticity.
• 27:10
  SPEAKER_00: That's your brain's ability to have a new experience.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_00: So imagine creating these new programs so that you just are and you don't have to talk yourself into things or you don't have to front something that you're not.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_00: Imagine.
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_00: I am enough exactly as I am.
• 27:32
  SPEAKER_00: It's safe for me to be seen.
• 27:36
  SPEAKER_00: I deserve to be successful.
• 27:41
  SPEAKER_00: I deserve healthy relationships.
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_00: I deserve clear boundaries.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_00: I can trust myself.
• 27:47
  SPEAKER_00: My voice matters.
• 27:50
  SPEAKER_00: You can imagine how that changes your life.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_00: If you really believe that and we're creating your life from that subconscious program instead of trying to pep talk or fake it till you make it.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_00: So in closing, imposter syndrome is not evidence that you don't belong.
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_00: It's evidence that a very old subconscious program is running.
• 28:12
  SPEAKER_00: But what I want you to know is that even the deepest programs, they can change.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_00: And they can change quickly.
• 28:21
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need to earn your healing, you don't even need to work harder or try harder or understand more.
• 28:29
  SPEAKER_00: You've probably been doing all of that.
• 28:31
  SPEAKER_00: You just need the right tools.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_00: And in my vast experience working with thousands and thousands and thousands of people for so long, exposed to the best of the best in healing and in modalities, these two frameworks are what I find help people move forward.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I was guided into them by something much bigger than me.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_00: I did not know what they were before I even went into the trainings.
• 28:58
  SPEAKER_00: It was literally God that placed me in them.
• 29:01
  SPEAKER_00: And then when I was in the trainings, I was like, oh, it's because this is what the world needs.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_00: So I'd love to just end with a practice.
• 29:10
  SPEAKER_00: I want to have some time and space for any parts of you that came up while you were listening to this, and then to work with any of those parts, but even the imposter syndrome specifically, those very contracted subconscious beliefs that we named in this episode.
• 29:28
  SPEAKER_00: So if you are wanting more after this, please go ahead and download your free workbook from my website.
• 29:39
  SPEAKER_00: It's about a 20-minute reflection practice with prompts that help you go into the subconscious patterns that most people deal with and give you a lot of insight and some tools in how to work even further.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_00: Can also schedule a free call with me if you have more questions.
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_00: Let's drop in.
• 30:04
  SPEAKER_00: Just taking a few deep breaths.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_00: Even if anything is tight or uncomfortable, just noticing but bringing in softness.
• 30:40
  SPEAKER_00: As you inhale, and as you exhale, come into your heart space.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_00: Let's bring in some light from source, creator, God, whatever you want to call it.
• 31:01
  SPEAKER_00: Let that come in through your crown.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_00: It's flowing all through your body.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_00: Really lighting up your heart space.
• 31:20
  SPEAKER_01: Continue to breathe.
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_00: Noticing what's present, but still breathing, still bringing in the light.
• 31:31
  SPEAKER_00: Allowing whatever's willing to soften to soften.
• 31:37
  SPEAKER_00: See if you can connect to presence.
• 31:44
  SPEAKER_00: Practice feeling presence.
• 31:55
  SPEAKER_00: I like to imagine myself as a tree.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_00: With roots that connect from the base of my spine into the center of the earth.
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like a beam of light in the form of a tree that runs from the divine through my body, down my grounding cord, connecting to the earth with roots.
• 32:24
  SPEAKER_00: Saying hello to Earth in this way, just remembering that connection.
• 32:32
  SPEAKER_00: Coming back into your heart, presence.
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_00: Feeling your heart expand and glow as you connect to it.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_00: From this presence as you breathe, see if you can connect to the feeling of openness and curiosity.
• 33:04
  SPEAKER_00: All three of these qualities being self-energy.
• 33:17
  SPEAKER_00: Whatever is present for you, whatever may have come up today.
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_00: See if you can extend your presence and openness and curiosity to a part of you that needs you.
• 33:35
  SPEAKER_00: And you'll know what needs you because you'll likely feel it in your body.
• 33:43
  SPEAKER_00: Your body tells you everything you need to know when you know how to be with it and listen.
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_00: Extend your presence and care, curiosity and openness to this part in your body that wants your attention.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_00: And maybe it's in your head, maybe it's thoughts.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_00: That's okay too.
• 34:06
  SPEAKER_00: Extending your care to the thoughts.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_00: And then from here, let this part of your body or the thought in your head.
• 34:29
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe it's something you feel around you.
• 34:34
  SPEAKER_00: Just let it know that you see it, you hear it, you sense it.
• 34:42
  SPEAKER_00: Take a couple breaths here and just really slow it down.
• 34:48
  SPEAKER_00: Parts feel very safe when we slow down.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_00: And maybe not all parts.
• 34:59
  SPEAKER_00: There might be a distractor part.
• 35:02
  SPEAKER_00: A part that loves to move fast to keep you from feeling deeply, and that's okay too.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_00: Let that part of us know that we see it.
• 35:13
  SPEAKER_00: I sense you.
• 35:36
  SPEAKER_00: And this may be all that you do, but this is a lot.
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_00: Connecting to your self-energy.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_00: Extending your self-energy to a part, maybe in your body, maybe to your mind.
• 35:56
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe something you sense around you.
• 35:58
  SPEAKER_00: You're extending your self-energy and letting it know you're right here with it, it's not alone.
• 36:09
  SPEAKER_00: Just practicing these three things, epic, game-changing.
• 36:20
  SPEAKER_00: I promise.
• 36:22
  SPEAKER_00: Parts need to get to know you and trust you.
• 36:26
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes this takes time.
• 36:28
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes in a session, lots of parts come out and have a lot of things to say.
• 36:32
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes not so much.
• 36:34
  SPEAKER_00: Parts sometimes need to just get to know you a bit before they show you things.
• 36:41
  SPEAKER_00: Taking a couple deep breaths.
• 36:43
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just naming that to any of those parts that might be available or present right now.
• 36:49
  SPEAKER_00: Want them to feel seen and heard.
• 36:54
  SPEAKER_00: They don't have to go away or be any different.
• 36:59
  SPEAKER_00: You just need to let them know that you're right here, extending your self-energy of curiosity and care.
• 37:09
  SPEAKER_00: Let them know they're not alone.
• 37:18
  SPEAKER_00: And if it feels right and you have the time and space and you want to practice, then you can start asking these parts of you what they need.
• 37:37
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes they'll tell you right away.
• 37:41
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes you have to practice listening.
• 37:44
  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes parts are shocked because they've never been asked this before.
• 37:51
  SPEAKER_00: I can tell you that they're most often very exhausted.
• 37:58
  SPEAKER_00: So just letting them know that they're not alone is a very helpful.
• 38:04
  SPEAKER_00: Mostly they just need validation and to be seen.
• 38:07
  SPEAKER_00: So as I continue in these solo episodes, I will offer more tools, but just this place to start is very powerful, very impactful, very helpful.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_00: It is my pleasure and honor to offer this to you.
• 38:28
  SPEAKER_00: And if this lands, what I'll be talking about in the next solo episode is perfectionism.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_00: That's a wrap on today's episode of Stories from the Lost and Found.
• 38:41
  SPEAKER_00: If something here resonated with you, the best thing you can do is share it.
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_00: Send this to someone who really needs to hear it.
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_00: And if you are ready to go deeper, I would love to support you.
• 38:50
  SPEAKER_00: Download my free workbook.
• 38:51
  SPEAKER_00: It walks you through your own subconscious blocks.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_00: You can find that link in the show notes.
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_00: Or if you're ready for a real shift, book a free strategy call and let's figure out what is keeping you from moving forward.
• 39:02
  SPEAKER_00: I'll see you next week.
• 39:03
  SPEAKER_00: Your next breakthrough is closer than you think.