Latest / The Hotmomz Lifestyle Podcast / #220: Nervous System Regulation: Regulation Calms the Body, Trauma Work Heals the Root (Part Two)

Transcript

#220: Nervous System Regulation: Regulation Calms the Body, Trauma Work Heals the Root (Part Two) · The Hotmomz Lifestyle Podcast

0:00
SPEAKER_00: So the trauma is going to leak sideways.
0:01
SPEAKER_00: You're not going to snap at your kids as you're not going to snap at the kids as much, but you're going to go into over-controlling food or over-controlling something at work or money or your calendar or your husband or your team.
0:11
SPEAKER_00: It's like the charge is going to find a front door, back door, side door.
0:15
SPEAKER_00: You mistake calm and clarity for being healed.
0:18
SPEAKER_00: And it's like just because your body is now more calm does not mean the original thing has been processed.
0:23
SPEAKER_00: That's 100%.
0:24
SPEAKER_00: You what happened is you just found a better way to put the lid on.
0:27
SPEAKER_00: And it's going to set you up to need more and more tools, more and more tools, more and more tools.
0:31
SPEAKER_00: A trigger that requires a walk.
0:33
SPEAKER_00: Now you got to go walk.
0:33
SPEAKER_00: Now you got to go write.
0:34
SPEAKER_00: Now you got to go do this.
0:35
SPEAKER_00: Now you gotta go tap.
0:36
SPEAKER_00: Now you gotta go journal.
0:37
SPEAKER_00: Now you need a magnesium bath just to function while the root's still running in the background.
0:41
SPEAKER_00: So you gotta think of it like this regulation, nervous system regulation gives you access to get back in your body, to be in your body, to respond versus reacting.
0:49
SPEAKER_00: Trauma work changes what the body believes is actually dangerous.
0:54
SPEAKER_00: So you address the trauma, you won't need to go and have all these different things.
0:58
SPEAKER_00: You're just being living, and you've got the tool.
1:00
SPEAKER_00: You now know how to address the trauma when you do experience one because you will.
1:04
SPEAKER_00: It's very human.
1:05
SPEAKER_00: A regulated nervous system is gonna help you pause, breathe, choose, and not react.
1:09
SPEAKER_00: But trauma clearing asks you, why did my body decide this was unsafe in the first place?
1:14
SPEAKER_00: Where did I learn that being seen and putting it out there is not safe?
1:19
SPEAKER_00: Where did I learn that being too much or being all of me or being myself gets me punished?
1:23
SPEAKER_00: Where did I learn that money gets taken?
1:25
SPEAKER_00: There's not enough money, guilt around having a lot of money.
1:28
SPEAKER_00: Where did I learn that rest means danger?
1:30
SPEAKER_00: Where did I learn, where did I not learn how to be bored?
1:34
SPEAKER_00: Because that's why we change plans.
1:36
SPEAKER_00: Doctors add hormones and optimize everything because we don't know.
1:39
SPEAKER_00: No one ever, there was no nobody to help us through when things did seem calm or good.
1:45
SPEAKER_00: Where did I learn that being successful is gonna cost me something?
1:49
SPEAKER_00: Where did I learn that men are bad, women are bad, or people are always gonna try to come for you, come for me?
1:54
SPEAKER_00: Where did I learn that I needed to be loved?
1:56
SPEAKER_00: All that is the that's the root work.
1:58
SPEAKER_00: Where did I learn, where did I learn that starving myself equaled a better body?
2:03
SPEAKER_00: Where did I learn that punishment and feeling pain equaled a better body?
2:08
SPEAKER_00: So yeah, high performers, I love the thing, nervous system regulation and all that, you make more money and you have everything you want.
2:14
SPEAKER_00: But if the trauma underneath stays untouched, the nervous system's gonna, it's just gonna keep saying, I can hold more and more, but I still don't feel safe.
2:23
SPEAKER_00: And eventually it's gonna collect and it's gonna turn into burnout, marriage failure, rage, autoimmune issues, auto, autoissue flares, insomnia, emotional numbness because you're constantly overriding, overriding and gaslighting and bypassing, food chaos, marriage tension, losing desire, needing more control, more intensity, and more proof that something is working.
2:46
SPEAKER_00: So, yes, nervous system regulation is important because once you're regulated, okay, now you can start to see what the root issue is, and then you address the trauma, the root issue, so that it can stay, so that the success can stay.
2:59
SPEAKER_00: There's a huge difference in that.
3:00
SPEAKER_00: So think about it.
3:01
SPEAKER_00: Nervous system regulation helps the body calm down, feel safe.
3:05
SPEAKER_00: Nervous system regulation helps the body come back to calm, get out of your the amygdala, out of the fear-based part of the brain where there's literally no logic.
3:13
SPEAKER_00: This is when you see women freaking out.
3:15
SPEAKER_00: I've seen women come in, pay me, get access to something, and then they just freak out.
3:19
SPEAKER_00: And they're like, This is not what I thought it was.
3:21
SPEAKER_00: I need out, I need out, I need out.
3:22
SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, whoa, activated her fight or flight.
3:25
SPEAKER_00: It activated a part that her trauma shows up and triggers show up.
3:29
SPEAKER_00: And it she's starting to get closer to that thing when she addresses this work and it scares her.
3:34
SPEAKER_00: And then she thinks that it's overwhelming, it's not for her, whatever.
3:36
SPEAKER_00: So regulation is gonna help her calm down, come back to her logical brain and understand, oh, this is a trigger.
3:42
SPEAKER_00: Here's what I do to get through it.
3:43
SPEAKER_00: I don't need to react, I need to respond differently to change my outcome.
3:48
SPEAKER_00: Trauma work helps to update that thing that was causing her to react and need to learn how to respond and regulate.
3:55
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna update that original experience and make it feel, it's gonna update the original thing that caused her to even have that trigger.
4:04
SPEAKER_00: So it's when they get triggered, the goal is not to let me think differently, breathe, and come back around here and get back to my logical brain and ask myself what the next safe step would be if I already had the thing.
4:12
SPEAKER_00: If I was already the future self, what would my future self do?
4:15
SPEAKER_00: If she already had the thing, what would she feel and behave like right now?
4:18
SPEAKER_00: The goal is what part of me is what part of me, what emotion A am I feeling?
4:23
SPEAKER_00: What is this?
4:24
SPEAKER_00: What am I feeling?
4:25
SPEAKER_00: Okay, so emotional intelligence has to come into play, emotional awareness has to come into play.
4:29
SPEAKER_00: So, yeah, what is going on right now?
4:31
SPEAKER_00: What is the trigger?
4:32
SPEAKER_00: I'm feeling the you validate.
4:34
SPEAKER_00: What part of me remembers this?
4:36
SPEAKER_00: Where did it come from?
4:37
SPEAKER_00: What was similar?
4:38
SPEAKER_00: How old is she?
4:39
SPEAKER_00: Many ages, how old?
4:40
SPEAKER_00: What did she need then that we can give her now to let her know she's safe, protected?
4:45
SPEAKER_00: Whatever she needed back then.
4:47
SPEAKER_00: How do we bring her into the now?
4:49
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes it's gonna look like raging and letting it move through you, and you have to beat the shit out of your thighs and maybe scream or something or say fuck off and say the shit she wants to do or whatever.
4:58
SPEAKER_00: She may cry deep weeping, may puke, may just let you know I'm here, you're not alone.
5:03
SPEAKER_00: It's gonna be okay, right?
5:04
SPEAKER_00: She may need like EMDR therapy.
5:06
SPEAKER_00: We may need psychedelic therapy, we may need just cognitive behavioral therapy, right?
5:11
SPEAKER_00: But we do know that, yeah, survival mode, dysregulation doesn't think clearly.
5:15
SPEAKER_00: This is why women are like, I got too much going on right now to do this.
5:17
SPEAKER_00: And it's you don't even make sense right now.
5:19
SPEAKER_00: This is literally why this work exists, because you have to do something.
5:23
SPEAKER_00: You're in survival mode right now.
5:24
SPEAKER_00: You're in freeze, fawn, shutdown, fight mode.
5:26
SPEAKER_00: You're literally, no, but in, but she's not thinking logically.
5:29
SPEAKER_00: She's responding, she's reacting to her current circumstances, thinking that when things calm down, then she'll do it.
5:34
SPEAKER_00: The most successful people take action when things are not calm, when shit blows up.
5:37
SPEAKER_00: I had this one lady that was going to, and she's high, high performer.
5:40
SPEAKER_00: Something really bad happened.
5:42
SPEAKER_00: One of her clients, it was a big thing.
5:43
SPEAKER_00: There was a death, it was a public thing everywhere.
5:46
SPEAKER_00: And she pushed off doing this work for two weeks.
5:49
SPEAKER_00: In her mind, it was like there's no way she could handle something right now.
5:51
SPEAKER_00: It's because she thinks when she gets in, she's gonna have to do, I don't know, a diet or something when really she needed support, she needed regulation, she needed to be able, she needed something to help her come back to her body to not be in constant reactivity.
6:03
SPEAKER_00: So having prolonged exposure to the thing, be invisible.
6:07
SPEAKER_00: And this is where we really have to look at some things.
6:09
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes it's repeated exposure.
6:11
SPEAKER_00: If you're scared of water, keep getting in the water with someone safe that you trust to show your body and teach your body.
6:15
SPEAKER_00: You could do EMDR, you could do psychedelic therapy, you could do, there's tons of ways because you have to address like our sometimes our traumas also are very deeply embedded in our subconscious.
6:24
SPEAKER_00: And their only way to access that are through sometimes addressing hormones.
6:29
SPEAKER_00: This is why when we address a woman's hormones, we really put some of the trauma work in there because she's gonna is her body's gonna start feeling safer and more resourced.
6:36
SPEAKER_00: This is when things come up, it's like, oh hi, now that we've got the energy to do this.
6:39
SPEAKER_00: Hi, remember me?
6:40
SPEAKER_00: Remember me in when we were 13 or 22 years old or had your first kid, remember me?
6:43
SPEAKER_00: Hi.
6:43
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
6:44
SPEAKER_00: So the framework, we have the specific framework, four-step framework that helps this.
6:48
SPEAKER_00: But what you can do is you what usually happens is you get a trigger, which your triggers are your teachers, and it's gonna come up with if you think about something over and over, I'll move to that.
6:59
SPEAKER_00: But fight looks like attacking, defending, proving, controlling.
7:03
SPEAKER_00: I've had women who didn't like something I said or felt like they were got shit into the stick or felt disappointed in something.
7:10
SPEAKER_00: They immediately went to attacking my identity, attacking me as a person, blasting my shit online.
7:15
SPEAKER_00: They went straight into fight mode from their trigger, which means they're just gonna stay in the cycle.
7:19
SPEAKER_00: They're never gonna address the actual trauma and heal.
7:22
SPEAKER_00: They're just gonna stay in the same cycle, defending, proving, and controlling, right?
7:25
SPEAKER_00: They're gonna stay in fight mode.
7:27
SPEAKER_00: Then the flight is escaping, overworking, avoiding, distracting.
7:31
SPEAKER_00: This is where a lot of women stay.
7:33
SPEAKER_00: They stay scrolling, they say avoiding.
7:35
SPEAKER_00: I'll do it later when the time's better, when the money's better, when this and all that freeze is just numb, stuck, literally can't move.
7:41
SPEAKER_00: Not much is even happening.
7:43
SPEAKER_00: And then fawning is pleasing, trying to make everybody happy.
7:46
SPEAKER_00: And I still do this with certain clients is I try to please.
7:49
SPEAKER_00: If I say the wrong thing, she's gonna literally like I did it the other day with a lady from years ago, and we knew when she signed up, my closer told me she goes, This one's gonna be a handful.
7:57
SPEAKER_00: I don't know if she's the right fit, but she's she wants in.
8:00
SPEAKER_00: Cool, she gets in, and we already knew right away she was one of the know-it-alls.
8:03
SPEAKER_00: She, well, I already do this, I already do this, I'm already doing this.
8:06
SPEAKER_00: I'm already, I've been doing this for 15 years.
8:07
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, okay, even our physicians turned her down because they were like, Why are you even here?
8:11
SPEAKER_00: And so by the time I addressed her of how to coach her, hey, here's what's going on.
8:16
SPEAKER_00: So how about we work on this?
8:17
SPEAKER_00: And she immediately didn't even answer back, went in and said, All I was trying to do was sell her and did a chargeback.
8:22
SPEAKER_00: So it's like my body over time, and she's not the first to shut down some women.
8:27
SPEAKER_00: I remember one lady paid$10,000.
8:29
SPEAKER_00: She wanted the whoosh, she wanted me to go straight in and tell her where she was blocked, what to do.
8:33
SPEAKER_00: We get in on the session.
8:34
SPEAKER_00: I go, first of all, your real name is not even your real name.
8:36
SPEAKER_00: And this is what's going on, this is what I'm seeing.
8:38
SPEAKER_00: How long were this uh you're adopted?
8:40
SPEAKER_00: She she fucking freaked out.
8:42
SPEAKER_00: I helped her get through the trauma, all the traumatic things during that session.
8:46
SPEAKER_00: It took an hour and a half.
8:47
SPEAKER_00: Afterwards, she completely never contacted me again, was terrified, literally, never wanted to be around.
8:53
SPEAKER_00: We never even heard from her again.
8:55
SPEAKER_00: So it's like I have had to, it's been interesting for me.
8:58
SPEAKER_00: And for me, I've had to really increase my awareness, my intuitive trust that hey, this woman may say this, but here's what I'm feeling.
9:05
SPEAKER_00: It's for me.
9:06
SPEAKER_00: And so now I've learned that.
9:07
SPEAKER_00: So you've got to name the activated part.
9:09
SPEAKER_00: Hey, this feels like a three-year-old.
9:11
SPEAKER_00: This feels like a 10-year-old tantruming because the girl got chosen on for cheer team and she didn't.
9:16
SPEAKER_00: And now she's taking it out on Casey Ship online.
9:19
SPEAKER_00: You know what I'm saying?
9:20
SPEAKER_00: It's like now these women are feeling disappointed and wanting to say that they thought this and that.
9:24
SPEAKER_00: And it's like, really, where did that come from?
9:26
SPEAKER_00: It's always just, it's always gonna be projected outward.
9:29
SPEAKER_00: People are only acting and being like who they are on the inside.
9:32
SPEAKER_00: Like nothing is we can't take anything personally because everybody's walk around in usually trauma states.
9:38
SPEAKER_00: Where did she feel humiliated?
9:39
SPEAKER_00: Did she feel like this?
9:40
SPEAKER_00: Because some people are only like, I'm gonna stand up for myself and I'm gonna, so it's like now her fucking 13-year-old, 17-year-old that says fuck the world's coming out on everybody.
9:48
SPEAKER_00: She's thinking that she's being empowered and dealing with her shit, and she's not, she's hurting people, she's hurting people in the way.
9:52
SPEAKER_00: She's not, she's outwardly projecting, she's not letting it move through her and alchemizing it into something that's good for the whole, right?
9:59
SPEAKER_00: So you have to find the original wound.
10:01
SPEAKER_00: Where did it come from?
10:02
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes it comes from 13 generations before you and it has to stop with you.
10:06
SPEAKER_00: You have to let it complete, you have to close the cycle, the loop, and you know, I have to know how to fully close the loop and come back into your body.
10:12
SPEAKER_00: Let it fully move through and it loses its charge.
10:15
SPEAKER_00: It's kind of like you do something once you're terrified of.
10:18
SPEAKER_00: Next time it's not so scary, right?
10:19
SPEAKER_00: You got past the thing, and then you can install the new truth.
10:22
SPEAKER_00: And then you need proof.
10:23
SPEAKER_00: Your nervous system at that point needs receipts, continuing things that it's okay, it can be trusted.
10:28
SPEAKER_00: We can trust ourselves.
10:29
SPEAKER_00: We can trust that it's safe to be, have, do, or look and act this way.
10:33
SPEAKER_00: You take one present forward, positive, inspired step.
10:36
SPEAKER_00: Maybe it's send the email, eat the meal, film the thing, say the thing.
10:40
SPEAKER_00: So, how you know if you've had micro trauma, you still think about the person and or event happening.
10:45
SPEAKER_00: Your body reacts when you think about this person, place, or thing.
10:48
SPEAKER_00: You feel anger, shame, threat, fear when you think about this memory person or place or thing.
10:54
SPEAKER_00: It changed your behavior afterward.
10:55
SPEAKER_00: Like for me, some of the things in business and some of the things in my life, like in my life where I've been hurt physically, I have completely I remember I broke my arm in middle school.
11:05
SPEAKER_00: And because I was hurt so much growing up, I kind of think that I hold back from doing action sports now.
11:11
SPEAKER_00: I'm like, yeah, no, you avoid things because of it.
11:13
SPEAKER_00: How many times do you avoid booking the call because you're afraid of spending money because it didn't work last time?
11:18
SPEAKER_00: That's trauma.
11:18
SPEAKER_00: And you have to address that trauma so you can move forward.
11:21
SPEAKER_00: It creates beliefs that said like how the world is, or how like most trainers or most programs or most money or most men or women, it you you create stories like something happened, and then all of a sudden the story on how you see things.
11:32
SPEAKER_00: Like my husband, he had this fucked up view about anybody with money did bad things to get it.
11:37
SPEAKER_00: And I would just be like, What the fuck?
11:38
SPEAKER_00: And I had to just keep working on him with that, and finally and we found out where it came from.
11:43
SPEAKER_00: So it's very strange.
11:45
SPEAKER_00: It's not strange, it makes perfect sense, actually.
11:48
SPEAKER_00: But trauma responses can also be intrusive thoughts.
11:50
SPEAKER_00: If you've ever just been like randomly thinking shit and just like random, scary intrusive thoughts or shit that you think in like I can't tell anybody, or they'll think I'm fucking crazy.
11:58
SPEAKER_00: Intrusive thoughts, avoidance, just avoidance, period.
12:01
SPEAKER_00: Negative changes in your mood and or thinking.
12:04
SPEAKER_00: These are how this, these are also little microwaves trauma shows up.
12:07
SPEAKER_00: Waking up with your heart racing at night, thinking about a bunch of things, trauma, feeling tense, on guard, trouble sleeping, all these things.
12:13
SPEAKER_00: So those that's why I wanted to do this video because nervous system regulation is great, but it's not gonna fix and heal the root issue.
12:21
SPEAKER_00: Not that you need to be fixed, but I don't know about you.
12:23
SPEAKER_00: There came a time in my life where I had to stop numbing.
12:26
SPEAKER_00: I had to I stopped drinking THC, caffeine, Adderall, where my body, I was like, I'm not gonna be able to approach business with adrenaline or pressure.
12:35
SPEAKER_00: I'm not gonna be able to sell in the same way because it feels bad.
12:38
SPEAKER_00: Not like I don't want to sell, just because these women don't, they're not ready for this level.
12:42
SPEAKER_00: There they shouldn't have to be sold into it.
12:44
SPEAKER_00: They're just not ready for this level.
12:46
SPEAKER_00: Some are so yes, for me, I got to a point where I had to start addressing shit.
12:51
SPEAKER_00: And because of regulation stuff, for me, how do I word this?
12:56
SPEAKER_00: To me, I did both at the same time.
12:57
SPEAKER_00: But yeah, that's why I wanted to make this video is because regulation is just not enough.
13:00
SPEAKER_00: Regulation is not gonna heal the root issue of it.
13:02
SPEAKER_00: And yeah, it's not sexy.
13:04
SPEAKER_00: Trauma-informed fitness, it's not sexy.
13:05
SPEAKER_00: Oh, you want to make millions of dollars and get hot?
13:08
SPEAKER_00: Okay, let's work on your trauma.
13:09
SPEAKER_00: It's not sexy, but it is the thing that changed my life more than and it's not fake it till you make it either.
13:14
SPEAKER_00: You can tell when somebody's embodied, okay, when they've because trauma, and I put this morning on my threads and Instagram.
13:20
SPEAKER_00: I said, I said, triggers are not the proof you're broken.
13:23
SPEAKER_00: They're the portals to the part of you that's still frozen in the old moment.
13:26
SPEAKER_00: Trauma work heals the root, not the nervous system regulation work.
13:29
SPEAKER_00: Regulation comes once trauma is acknowledged and worked with.
13:32
SPEAKER_00: Where is the oh, there's no healing without pain and endless triggers.
13:36
SPEAKER_00: There's no healing without pain and endless triggers.
13:38
SPEAKER_00: There's no healing without pain and endless triggers.
13:40
SPEAKER_00: I'm not saying that you have to live a life of hard, okay?
13:44
SPEAKER_00: Quite the contrary.
13:45
SPEAKER_00: It's it's actually more empowering to me.
13:47
SPEAKER_00: It's where it's like, yeah, that's gonna be a no.
13:49
SPEAKER_00: I'm not gonna, that's yeah, that's a no.
13:51
SPEAKER_00: I believe in structure and getting your ass up, going to the gym, eating the right food and stuff, but it's yeah, we're not gonna force ourselves to work with these people or I'm not going to make my body beat it into submission or whatever.
14:01
SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna be more gentle with it.
14:03
SPEAKER_00: It may take longer, but it's gonna be healthier for me.
14:05
SPEAKER_00: It's things like that.
14:06
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but endless triggers, like once you're sober enough, yeah.
14:09
SPEAKER_00: That's how we that's you want to heal your shit.
14:12
SPEAKER_00: That's how is you take so much fucking action that you're like, oh my God, so much action to the point of what's scaring you right now?
14:19
SPEAKER_00: What are you avoiding right now?
14:20
SPEAKER_00: Start doing that.
14:21
SPEAKER_00: Whatever you feel like, oh, I'm so overwhelmed, I've got all this shit to do.
14:23
SPEAKER_00: What's then do one thing today?
14:25
SPEAKER_00: Get up right now, go do the thing you know you need to be doing right now.
14:28
SPEAKER_00: That's the fastest way to heal your trauma right there.
14:30
SPEAKER_00: Because you start doing that, that's gonna create structure.
14:33
SPEAKER_00: Your body's gonna start feeling more safe.
14:35
SPEAKER_00: Okay, we can trust her now.
14:36
SPEAKER_00: Okay, we're getting some more stuff.
14:37
SPEAKER_00: Okay, we're feeling good.
14:38
SPEAKER_00: Now some things will come up that show you the trauma, some things that maybe activate you, like you can't stop thinking about you wake up thinking about all that.
14:45
SPEAKER_00: There's one.
14:45
SPEAKER_00: Now let's go address that because then that's one, right?
14:48
SPEAKER_00: And you keep going, you keep working out, your life keeps getting better, you keep getting better, the right.
14:52
SPEAKER_00: Then something comes up, right?
14:53
SPEAKER_00: So it's gonna be a continual thing like that.
14:55
SPEAKER_00: It's anybody that's sitting here telling you it's just gonna be, oh my God, so perfect and awesome every day, all that.
15:00
SPEAKER_00: No, it's gonna be climb, amazing, and then huh, here's what's coming up.
15:05
SPEAKER_00: Let's address it.
15:05
SPEAKER_00: Takes 10 minutes, takes 30 minutes, takes an hour, right?
15:08
SPEAKER_00: So that's it's learning how to live a trauma-informed life.
15:12
SPEAKER_00: It's like my husband today was talking to my boys about what he went through.
15:14
SPEAKER_00: And I said, look, boys, we're not saying that life, we're not saying that you're gonna have to go through what Skip went through or life's gonna be hunky dory or hard.
15:23
SPEAKER_00: We just want you to know that life is an experience for each person.
15:27
SPEAKER_00: And no matter what happens, you boys will have the tools.
15:30
SPEAKER_00: You won't be alone in it.
15:32
SPEAKER_00: Whatever happens, okay, is happening for you.
15:34
SPEAKER_00: You're gonna have the therapy resource.
15:37
SPEAKER_00: You're gonna have the people that can help you, the medicines, the plant medicines, you're gonna have the modalities.
15:42
SPEAKER_00: You're gonna have you, you won't be those like those older people, the silent generation who had nothing and no education around it.
15:48
SPEAKER_00: You will be able to finally get the help that you need to address, not medicate it, but to address the trauma because I truly believe that addressing trauma opens your heart.
15:58
SPEAKER_00: It opens your heart to love more.
15:59
SPEAKER_00: And so can you imagine a world where you feel more connected to love energy?
16:05
SPEAKER_00: There's nothing better.
16:06
SPEAKER_00: It's like, can I get drunk on that ship?
16:08
SPEAKER_00: Healing trauma opens your heart.
16:10
SPEAKER_00: Really, you're less judgmental, you're more forgiving of yourself and others, you're more resilient because you're not so walking around, I can't handle this and I'm avoiding everything.
16:18
SPEAKER_00: You're like, I can handle this.
16:20
SPEAKER_00: We're gonna figure it out.
16:21
SPEAKER_00: We're okay either way.
16:22
SPEAKER_00: We can do this.
16:22
SPEAKER_00: It's you've just become great.
16:25
SPEAKER_00: And it brings me to tears because I know most people are not living to their potential.
16:30
SPEAKER_00: I know that most women are not doing what they're supposed to be doing.
16:34
SPEAKER_00: So many women are supposed to be leading right now.
16:36
SPEAKER_00: They're supposed to be helping other people by sharing their own stories, but they're too fucking ashamed to do it.
16:41
SPEAKER_00: They're too worried about what people are gonna think.
16:42
SPEAKER_00: There's no amount of regulation that's gonna fix that shit.
16:45
SPEAKER_00: You can get confident somebody pumping you up, but after you post it and the coach disappears and you're all alone, you've gone through a season.
16:52
SPEAKER_00: Do you know what's happening?
16:53
SPEAKER_00: Do you know what next step to take?
16:54
SPEAKER_00: Are you resourced?
16:55
SPEAKER_00: So yeah, I got a lot of gratitude and grief at the same time because I wish I had this years ago.
17:00
SPEAKER_00: I wish I had to stay in power.
17:02
SPEAKER_00: I wish I had the wisdom and the knowledge.
17:04
SPEAKER_00: Uh over medicated.
17:05
SPEAKER_00: I took out her off a long time and I put off things, but when I started doing trauma-informed work, it just went so much better because we're no longer, we're no longer not acknowledging what we have experienced.
17:17
SPEAKER_00: And I truly believe that everything that I've healed and cleared, people that try to take me down, people that wanted to see me fail.
17:23
SPEAKER_00: Like every time I heal more and more of my shit, I just rise.
17:26
SPEAKER_00: And then they it's just, I don't do it for that, but it really does make you resilient as fuck.
17:31
SPEAKER_00: By the way, my course, resilient as fuck, is totally for you.
17:34
SPEAKER_00: Makes you resilient as fuck.
17:36
SPEAKER_00: And you know what's best is you have fucking more fun.
17:38
SPEAKER_00: You have so much more fun and so much of uh it's just more fun.
17:41
SPEAKER_00: You just have fucking more fun.
17:43
SPEAKER_00: And you get to create an impact.
17:44
SPEAKER_00: You get to do something bigger than what you're doing right now.
17:47
SPEAKER_00: And that's why we're here, right?
17:48
SPEAKER_00: To leave the world a way better place than how we found it.