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Why You Can’t Think Clearly When You’re Anxious · Bye Bye Panic

• 0:00
  [SPEAKER_00]: Have you ever wondered why your worst case thoughts suddenly feel so real when you're anxious?
• 0:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like even before you get a chance to rationalize your thoughts, your mind just jumps into the scariest outcome.
• 0:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: Well, what if I was to tell you that your nervous system is doing exactly what it's supposed to do, based on the state that it's in?
• 0:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: And when you're in the state, you're dealing with chronic physical symptoms and dealing with intrusive thoughts.
• 0:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so in this video, I want to share with you how to deal with these anxious thoughts that feel so real.
• 0:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: how to stop spiraling when your mind goes somewhere crazy, and how to think clearly again, even when anxiety's present.
• 0:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so let's start with the first thing to understand, which is your thoughts and bodily sensations come from the same place.
• 0:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: Whenever you're dealing with chronic symptoms and with a nervous system that's stuck on protection mode, you might notice that you're also getting a lot of intrusive thoughts, a lot of scary thoughts.
• 1:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: And what happens is that people tend to get better at responding to the bodily sensations they realize it's part of the nervous system, but they have difficulty doing that with thoughts.
• 1:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so you'll notice the more you allow the symptoms to be there, the bodily sensations you're getting better at that, but you'll notice the thoughts come full force.
• 1:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: And what I'm here to tell you is that the thoughts and the bodily sensations are coming from the same place.
• 1:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: The root cause is still your nervous system.
• 1:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: Your thoughts are basically a symptom of your nervous system being on protection mode, no different than bodily sensations.
• 1:38
  [SPEAKER_00]: And before I continue, this is something that I've learned after helping thousands of people overcome their symptoms, and it was the same thing that I personally dealt with.
• 1:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: So just know that there are no judgments here, and it's really easy to make the thoughts as something different.
• 1:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: But the truth is is that the thoughts are still
• 2:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: What happens is people get really good at responding to the bodily sensations, but what they don't do is that they don't respond to the thoughts.
• 2:09
  [SPEAKER_00]: They still get very engaged with the thoughts.
• 2:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: They still argue with the thoughts.
• 2:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: But the truth is that the thoughts are also a symptom of a hypersensitive nervous system.
• 2:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's still a symptom of the anxiety.
• 2:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so the framework that we teach that's very helpful is something called throwing everything under the nervous system umbrella.
• 2:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: What that means is instead of identifying and peace mealing every single symptom, like the dizziness, the digestive issues, the intrusive thoughts, you put it all under one umbrella.
• 2:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: Moving forward, you only have one issue, which is your nervous system is stuck on protection mode.
• 2:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: What this will allow you to do is that it will allow you to have some space with your thoughts.
• 2:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: Instead of being identified and engaged with the thoughts, you realize the thoughts is also adrenaline.
• 2:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's just adrenaline burning itself out.
• 3:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's just your brain having these thoughts and burning itself off the same way your heart beats as a way of burning off the adrenaline.
• 3:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: Now, as you do this, you're going to recognize something really important.
• 3:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this leads me to point two, which is, you are not your thoughts.
• 3:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: See, most of our lives, we are very identified with our thoughts.
• 3:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: Whenever we have a thought, we think we are the individuals that are coming up with the thought.
• 3:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: But when you're dealing with the hypersensitive nervous system, your thoughts are an offset based on the state that you are in.
• 3:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: So this means that if your nervous system has become hypersensitive, if you're dealing with chronic stress, because you're in that state, your mind will naturally be creating more scary thoughts.
• 3:47
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you'll notice when you have moments of calm, that same thought doesn't feel as real.
• 3:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so it's recognizing that these thoughts are not yours.
• 3:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: You are the awareness of these thoughts, but the thoughts are very dependent.
• 4:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: They're very dependent on your mood, dependent on your state, how you're feeling that day.
• 4:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this was one of the things that blew my mind when I was on the healing journey.
• 4:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because I started realizing that, yes, the symptoms were not real, even though they felt really real, but they were just part of my nervous system.
• 4:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: But one thing I had never done up to that point is recognize that I wasn't my thoughts.
• 4:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: That the thought that I was having wasn't because I was going crazy, but it was because of the state that I was in.
• 4:32
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so instead of trying to argue with the thought and rationalize with the thought, I just became aware of the thought.
• 4:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: I just witnessed the thought.
• 4:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't try to fix it.
• 4:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't try to fight it.
• 4:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: I just label it as adrenaline burning itself off.
• 4:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes my heart would beat, sometimes my mind would race.
• 4:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: I would label it as the same thing, which was just labeling it as anxiety, or a hypersensitive nervous system.
• 4:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: Now, one of the things you might be noticing is that as you're doing this, you'll notice that the same scary thought keeps showing up, the same scary, what if thought?
• 5:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: Keep showing up and that it feels really real.
• 5:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so the next principle will help you identify
• 5:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: And in order to understand the next principle, you have to understand the difference between thoughts and thinking.
• 5:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this is a mistake that many people make because they assume thoughts and thinking are the same thing.
• 5:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: But there's actually a major difference.
• 5:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: Thoughts are passive.
• 5:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: There is nothing you can do.
• 5:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: You cannot predict your next thought.
• 5:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: Go ahead, try it.
• 5:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can't predict your next thought.
• 5:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: And you can't control what thought comes in.
• 5:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: Thoughts come and go.
• 5:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: they are based on your experience, your unbeliefs, your own past, you have no control over thoughts.
• 5:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: But thinking, thinking is active engagement.
• 5:52
  [SPEAKER_00]: Thinking is an action.
• 5:54
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can have thousands of thoughts a day.
• 5:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: But the thoughts that keep recycling, the thoughts that keep showing up over and over again, are based on your engagement.
• 6:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: So thinking is what reinforces the thought.
• 6:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: And this is a very unique thing because historically you have used thinking as a way to problem solve, right?
• 6:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: This works really well with your career, maybe with your relationships, just in general life.
• 6:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: If you have a problem, think through a solution.
• 6:22
  [SPEAKER_00]: And while that works incredibly well,
• 6:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: when it comes to a sensitized nervous system, thinking actually fuels the cycle, because what you're doing by thinking, by engaging, by arguing with the thought, is that you're telling your nervous system that this thought is important.
• 6:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: And when your nervous system thinks this thought is important, what it does is that it recycles the thought.
• 6:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so what happens is that you develop a vicious cycle.
• 6:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: You basically have a thought,
• 6:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: you begin engaging with it.
• 6:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: And that thought reinforces itself.
• 6:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so what do you do here, right?
• 6:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: If the thoughts are coming, if the thoughts are very scary, how do you not think about it?
• 7:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: Well, the first thing to recognize is that not thinking about it is different than not engaging with it.
• 7:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: you can have a thought.
• 7:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can be aware that the thought is there, but you can choose not to actively engage with it.
• 7:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: What happens is as you actively refuse to engage with the thought, I'm saying active because it feels like a lot of energy not to engage with the thought.
• 7:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: What you'll notice is that the thought comes more frequently.
• 7:28
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's almost like your nervous system is saying, hey, you need to focus on this thought, why aren't you thinking, why aren't you engaging
• 7:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: But what will happen is that as you let the thought be there without fighting it, without resisting it, just letting it be in continuing on living, your nervous system will learn through its prediction mechanism, that this thought is not dangerous.
• 7:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's not actually anything Sean needs to handle, because look, the thought keeps coming and Sean is fine.
• 7:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: He doesn't engage with it.
• 7:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: maybe this thought is not this important.
• 8:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: This is a really important step because this is where people realize that engaging with the thought is actually fueling it.
• 8:08
  [SPEAKER_00]: And once you realize that you have been fueling the cycle without realizing it, well, now you can stop fueling it.
• 8:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: And whenever you stop fueling it, the fire burns out on its own.
• 8:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: The thoughts disappear on its own.
• 8:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: Letting the thought burn out by itself is already going to make a massive impact on your healing journey.
• 8:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: But I want to go a layer deeper.
• 8:29
  [SPEAKER_00]: Because while thinking reinforces the thought, what determines your thoughts are the beliefs that you have.
• 8:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: So if you have a certain belief, you will naturally be having thoughts about whether that's true or not.
• 8:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: Beliefs in many ways are the fuel for the thought.
• 8:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's really important to realize that your brain is not a reactive organ, right?
• 8:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's not our brain isn't something that, you know, we see in the external environment, we interpret and then we decide the next steps.
• 8:57
  [SPEAKER_00]: Your brain isn't active prediction engine.
• 9:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: So what your brain is doing is that it's creating predictions.
• 9:04
  [SPEAKER_00]: Right, and that's why it's creating these thoughts.
• 9:06
  [SPEAKER_00]: And the predictions are based on your belief structures, what you believe around your symptoms, what you believe about what's possible when it comes to healing, what's worked in the past for you and if it's worked in the past, can it work in the future?
• 9:20
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so if you have certain beliefs around your symptoms you're healing or just any aspect of your life,
• 9:25
  [SPEAKER_00]: You might be thinking that you need to see something change in the external world, something outside, and then your beliefs will change.
• 9:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: But the truth is, is that beliefs are decisions.
• 9:37
  [SPEAKER_00]: You actively decide what to believe.
• 9:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: And the reason why this is important is because your nervous system is actually a filtering mechanism.
• 9:45
  [SPEAKER_00]: It doesn't see the world 100%.
• 9:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: It picks and chooses
• 9:55
  [SPEAKER_00]: So, if you believe that these thoughts will never go away, if you believe that you're broken, if you feel like something's wrong with you, even though it feels very real, your nervous system is going to look for validation.
• 10:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's going to look for ways to prove that that is true.
• 10:11
  [SPEAKER_00]: And yet, you can have the same person that's dealing with the exact same symptoms.
• 10:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: that's dealing with the exact what it thoughts, but believes that they're gonna heal, and because of that, they start seeing what's actually improving, how they're improving in their healing journey.
• 10:26
  [SPEAKER_00]: And the only thing you need to do is just choose your belief.
• 10:30
  [SPEAKER_00]: Whether you realize this or not, you are choosing beliefs all the time.
• 10:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're making a choice.
• 10:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: The question is, is that is it a conscious choice that you're making?
• 10:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: Whatever you believe, you can find evidence for that.
• 10:43
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so you might be thinking, okay, Sean, I want to believe that I can overcome these thoughts that I can heal, that I can go back to living.
• 10:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: How do I change my beliefs?
• 10:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: Well, I want to share with you a framework that really helps, which is called the decision matrix.
• 10:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: Like I mentioned, beliefs are decisions.
• 10:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: So how do you change a belief?
• 11:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: Well, it's really simple.
• 11:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: And it's a great matrix that many people in our program use, it's something I still use today, even though it has nothing to do with anxiety.
• 11:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: I just use it in other aspects of my life.
• 11:12
  [SPEAKER_00]: And in this decision making matrix, what you want to do is you just want to get a piece of paper.
• 11:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: And in this paper, you want to draw two lines.
• 11:21
  [SPEAKER_00]: And on the very left hand side, what you want to mention is the belief that's creating anxiety.
• 11:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: This could be around your symptoms, around a specific what if thoughts, what if I never get better, what if I'm going crazy, what if this is something else?
• 11:34
  [SPEAKER_00]: You put that on the left hand side.
• 11:36
  [SPEAKER_00]: Then in the middle, you want to install a new belief.
• 11:40
  [SPEAKER_00]: this is a new choice.
• 11:41
  [SPEAKER_00]: So instead of saying, this thought will never leave me to, this thought is just an anxious thought and it'll disappear on its own.
• 11:48
  [SPEAKER_00]: Then on the right, what you want to do is you want to think of all the evidence that you have, the
• 11:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: that the new belief is true.
• 11:59
  [SPEAKER_00]: Now you'll notice that this is really difficult to do.
• 12:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: You're so focused on what could go wrong, what could be there?
• 12:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: And your brain has this natural negativity bias that you thinking of evidence for why the opposite could be true will feel very weird.
• 12:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: It'll feel very incongruent.
• 12:15
  [SPEAKER_00]: And so for me, when I had these intrusive thoughts of thinking there was some medical issue, even though I got everything rolled out, I would write down on the right hand side.
• 12:24
  [SPEAKER_00]: I've gone to my doctors and they said everything is fine.
• 12:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: Every time I thought there was an urgent situation, it turned out to be nothing.
• 12:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: And what I did was, is that I would show all the evidence on the right hand side.
• 12:35
  [SPEAKER_00]: And after I did that, I would start realizing that the thoughts that I had, the old belief, wasn't even true.
• 12:42
  [SPEAKER_00]: It was a little bit silly.
• 12:44
  [SPEAKER_00]: Now, as I did this, this didn't go away overnight.
• 12:46
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's not like I did this once, and it disappeared.
• 12:50
  [SPEAKER_00]: I actually did it every morning.
• 12:51
  [SPEAKER_00]: It's something I still do.
• 12:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: And what you'll notice is that over time,
• 12:56
  [SPEAKER_00]: your belief structures will change because you're going to find active reasons for why the evidence is true.
• 13:02
  [SPEAKER_00]: And when you're doing that, your nervous system begins recalibrating.
• 13:05
  [SPEAKER_00]: It starts saying that, hey, there is evidence here and so it will naturally look at the external world and find evidence otherwise.
• 13:13
  [SPEAKER_00]: So you'll be more aware of the fact that you are making progress that things are getting better.
• 13:18
  [SPEAKER_00]: You will see exactly ways to show yourself that this isn't a life sentence.
• 13:23
  [SPEAKER_00]: It might feel forced at once, but you don't need to force it.
• 13:27
  [SPEAKER_00]: Just remind yourself all the time and do this exercise once a day.
• 13:31
  [SPEAKER_00]: Ideally, early in the morning.
• 13:33
  [SPEAKER_00]: As you do this, you recognize the intrusive thoughts, the scary anxious thoughts don't feel as real.
• 13:39
  [SPEAKER_00]: You'll notice that it's just a thought, and these thoughts, as you get better at responding to them, as you identify that thinking engages with them, as you change your belief structures around them, the thoughts almost disappear.
• 13:53
  [SPEAKER_00]: And even if they do show up, they don't hold the same emotional punch that they used to have.
• 14:01
  [SPEAKER_00]: In fact, you'll have the thought and you might not even notice you had the thought because it's such a silly thought.
• 14:07
  [SPEAKER_00]: So this is how you deal with thoughts, but if you want to know how do I heal my nervous system, well, I have a video called how to heal your nervous system by doing nothing.
• 14:17
  [SPEAKER_00]: You can check it out right here.
• 14:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: Thanks for watching and I'll see you in the next one.