Latest / Becoming Anchored / Becoming Anchored S2E12: How to Re-evaluate Your Relationship With Exercise

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Becoming Anchored S2E12: How to Re-evaluate Your Relationship With Exercise · Becoming Anchored

0:05
Hi everyone.
0:06
Welcome back to the Becoming Anchored podcast.
0:08
We're so glad that you're here with us today.
0:11
I am Lauren Jackson, one of your hosts.
0:13
This is our other host, Laura Dineen.
0:15
We are two licensed therapists in the Brentwood, Tennessee area.
0:20
We're part of a group private practice called Anchored Counseling Company.
0:24
Um, we specialize in working with clients anywhere from, um, eating
0:30
disorders, grief and loss, life transition, anxiety, depression,
0:34
OCD, um, kind of along that spectrum.
0:37
We see pretty much all ages all through the lifespan, um,
0:41
and we really love what we do.
0:43
And doing this podcast has been so fulfilling to us in
0:47
a different and unique way.
0:48
And so we're glad to be here as we wrap up season two, which is exciting.
0:52
Um, a quick disclaimer, we are not your therapist.
0:56
So the The purpose of this podcast is not meant to be therapy for you.
1:00
It's supposed to be informational, entertaining, engaging, if as you're
1:04
listening, you find that you might benefit from your own therapy if
1:07
you're not already in therapy.
1:09
Reach out to us if you're local.
1:10
We'd love to work with you.
1:11
If not, find somebody local to you who is licensed.
1:15
Thanks, Lauren.
1:16
Yeah, echoing Lauren, this podcast has just been such a
1:20
fun, fulfilling endeavor for us.
1:22
And we certainly love our work as therapists, but Lauren and I also
1:26
do quite a few administrative tasks.
1:28
And so really expanding our reach in this way has just been so life giving for us.
1:34
So if you're new to the podcast for this episode, welcome, welcome.
1:37
We're so glad to have you.
1:38
When we were really dreaming up what this podcast Um, could look like and
1:42
what we hoped it would look like.
1:44
We really hoped for this sweet blend of sharing our lived experiences
1:49
first and foremost as humans.
1:51
Um, and then also we have the wonderful gift of sitting
1:54
with clients on a daily basis.
1:57
And that's just such rich.
2:00
It's such sacred work.
2:01
It's such a gift to us as well.
2:03
And so yeah, the purpose of the podcast is twofold.
2:05
First and foremost, we really want to show up as humans.
2:08
And then we are also therapists.
2:09
And so our hope is that we get to share some of our nuggets of wisdom that
2:13
we have gleaned over the years, so.
2:15
Thanks, Lauren.
2:16
We're super glad that y'all are here.
2:34
We have an amazing topic for today and an important topic, I think, and we were
2:39
trying to Really figure out what we wanted to talk about before the episode today.
2:44
And we don't do a lot of planning for these episodes.
2:46
We really want them to be conversational in nature.
2:49
And, um, really raw and vulnerable and all the things.
2:52
But, yeah, Lauren and I were chatting in the hallway.
2:54
And we decided to talk to you all today about how to re evaluate
2:58
your relationship with movement.
3:01
Another word for that is exercise.
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So, that's what we're going to be sharing about today.
3:05
So, welcome.
3:06
Yes, welcome.
3:07
Welcome.
3:08
It is a big topic and I think something that for a long time I
3:14
think in our culture has been maybe in ways like really trendy, right?
3:19
Like a, like a working out and having like this elaborate kind of
3:24
exercise routine and sticking with it.
3:27
It can kind of in some ways go hand in hand with diet culture, which we've talked
3:30
about in, you know, in previous episodes.
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Um, and so yeah, our, our Hope in this conversation is to maybe even like
3:39
challenge you guys a little bit around your relationship with movement and we
3:43
like to use the word movement a lot.
3:46
Um, and I find myself using it a lot just with my clients as my
3:49
clients are reframing and kind of re evaluating their relationship.
3:54
They find that it's helpful to find a different word to describe
3:57
what it looks like to engage in exercise in a different way.
4:02
So, um, Yeah, I don't even know where to start with such a big topic.
4:09
I know, yeah.
4:10
I mean, I wonder, I'm happy to share some of my story, and I know you have
4:14
a your own story, too, around your relationship with movement, but yeah, I
4:19
actually just came from a barre class.
4:21
I put a little sweater on, but I came from a barre class and finding a group exercise
4:28
class has been a So fun for me and Lauren knows this, but I have made some
4:33
friends there and it's just been so fun.
4:36
We'll go and get bagels after class.
4:38
There's a little bagel shop right, you know, next door to my class and that,
4:43
but it, it hasn't always been that way.
4:44
And so I do want to be really clear about this.
4:46
This has taken a lot of intention, a lot of work on my behalf around
4:51
exploring my relationship with exercise.
4:54
But when I was like a little girl, I always wanted to ride horses, right?
4:58
Which is exercise and.
4:59
I think my parents were, you know, a little fearful of me doing that
5:03
just with, you know, how dangerous it can be, but I loved animals.
5:07
Loved, loved, loved animals.
5:08
And so, I rode horses for a long time and then I went through a big life change.
5:14
I had lived overseas, um, for many years and then moved back to the States.
5:19
And that was a really incredibly difficult time for me.
5:23
And there wasn't a horse farm close to where we were located in South Carolina.
5:27
And so I had a friend and she was like, Hey, I'm actually going
5:29
to join the cross country team.
5:31
And I mean, I didn't know anything about running and I started running.
5:36
And there's so many more pieces that I could talk about on today's episode.
5:41
Um, but really, I mean, the gist of it is that I really started
5:45
running in a compulsive way, in a way where that became.
5:50
My entire identity and I think I've shared this on the show But you know in
5:56
my eating disorder compulsive exercise was a part of my identity And then it I
6:00
became very avoidant of exercise, which is very common Whether it starts that way
6:05
or we kind of swing to the other end of the pendulum But yeah, I remember like
6:10
it was really incredibly hard for me to even take a day off from running and
6:14
like I remember I got my wisdom teeth out and And my doctor, you know, whoever
6:21
is the doctor, the surgeon that, you know, does the wisdom teeth removal, he's
6:24
like, okay, no exercise for five days.
6:26
And I remember that being incredibly hard for me.
6:29
And again, I was in the thick of things at this point.
6:31
I was not getting the appropriate support that I needed.
6:35
And I remember looking at my mom and being like, I am a runner
6:39
and I was so committed to this.
6:41
Yeah.
6:41
And I'm shuckling at this not making light of my struggles but I've done a
6:45
lot of the like trauma work around that time in my life and so it's okay for me
6:51
to to laugh about that at this point but that is just such a telling experience
6:56
for me because I was like so in it and my identity was so connected to Laura being
7:03
a runner and I said it with so much pride and looking back at that I just I didn't
7:08
know any different so I know that was kind of a long You know spiel but that's some
7:13
of my own history with exercise and over the years It's taken a lot of therapeutic
7:17
work to get to this place of like I can go to a bar class a couple times a week
7:20
and have friends there and That can be super fun for me and a, you know, a part
7:25
of my identity, but not my full identity.
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So, that's kind of what I wanted to share to start out with.
7:29
Well, and I think the point, the point that you make too, Laura, when
7:32
you were describing your initial relationship with exercise, that
7:39
maybe one of the things that was unhealthy for you about it was how
7:42
much of your identity was connected to.
7:45
Exercise.
7:46
Totally.
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Or how much of your worth, or your value, or, you know, I think those words
7:50
can in ways be interchangeable, right?
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So, um, and I wonder too, you know, if that really is a benchmark for
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what can make exercise meaningful.
8:03
What can help us have awareness that exercise maybe isn't in the
8:06
healthiest, like, place in our lives is how much of our value,
8:10
worth, identity is connected to it.
8:13
That is what is telling us we have to do it.
8:16
Um, because I have, in a lot of ways, a similar story to you, Laura.
8:20
Um, I was a ballet dancer for years and years.
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And so, and I grew up athletic.
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Like I grew up, you know, playing softball and soccer and basketball and
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kind of come from an athleticish family.
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So, you know, we were always kind of moving and playing outside and whatever.
8:41
Um, which looking back to my childhood, My relationship with movement was really
8:46
sweet and really healthy, and I didn't know any different as a, as a child.
8:50
Thank goodness.
8:52
Um, and then yeah, into my ballet years and into high school, it became
8:56
more compulsive, more obsessive, more enmeshed with my identity.
9:01
Not only the movement part, like the exercise part, but also like
9:05
the me being a ballet dancer.
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And so I have a, I have, What you were describing, Lauren, a similar
9:12
experience to going from way over exercising, compulsively needing to
9:20
move to, um, kind of swinging that pendulum to avoidance of movement.
9:26
Um, and, that can be problematic in itself in different ways.
9:31
And so, um, um, it's, it's taken a lot of years for me to figure out where movement
9:38
fits into my life in a way that, um, is healthy and in line with my values.
9:43
Um.
9:44
Yeah.
9:45
Yeah.
9:46
Yeah.
9:47
Yeah.
9:47
And gosh, there's so much here, right?
9:49
Because like Lauren said, you know, oftentimes we grow up and we
9:55
don't know any different, right?
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So if your parent has a tricky relationship with exercise and that's what
10:03
has been modeled for you, or that's what you've observed, or maybe you remember
10:07
your peers, talking about, you know, their diet or their relationship with
10:12
exercise in a problematic way, it's really common to, to want to belong and want to
10:18
connect with other people in this way.
10:20
And so it's like, oh, yeah, I'm gonna run cross country even
10:23
though looking back, like, I didn't really enjoy running, right?
10:27
Like I didn't, know anything about the running world, but I was going through
10:32
a hard season and my little like ninth grade girl self that was new to a new
10:38
school just wanted to belong in a way.
10:40
And I really just jumped at this first opportunity.
10:44
And you know, occasionally I'll go for a jog with my husband,
10:47
Sean, but like, I don't really enjoy it and it's not fun for me.
10:50
And so I think that's another piece here too, as we're kind
10:53
of, weaving some of our thoughts around exercise into this episode.
10:59
Really one of the first kind of pieces that we look for with clients and with
11:04
our own self is our own enjoyment with it.
11:07
Right?
11:07
So when I was riding horses before I started running and like Lauren talked
11:11
about her childhood, it's like, okay, how much are you enjoying this thing?
11:16
Right now, right?
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Like, I loved going and like grooming horses and petting them and feeding
11:21
them and giving them apples and carrots and like, that was so fun
11:24
for, I know you can probably imagine little Lara doing this, right?
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Like, ahhh!
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My favorite horse's name was named Bud and I always wanted to ride Bud
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and like, I just, I just loved it.
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Ugh, I have such fond memories of Sweet Bud.
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That's so sweet.
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And when other people like, got to ride him, I was so jealous.
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But anyway, it's a whole other thing.
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But yeah, I mean, it's like, even as I'm talking about it, I'm laughing.
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There's like, lightness to the conversation.
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It's, it was fun for me versus running was rule driven and inflexible.
11:56
You know, back to that wisdom teeth story and the wisdom teeth
11:58
removal that I went through.
12:00
You know, my inability to be okay with taking time.
12:05
off.
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Like that was problematic as well.
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The fact that I didn't love running or that it didn't bring me joy.
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That was problematic.
12:12
And again, my like 14, 15 year old self didn't have the language
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or awareness that I have now.
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So lots here.
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Yeah.
12:21
Yeah.
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Yeah.
12:23
That, and I think that's something for as we're talking about reevaluating, you
12:29
know, relationship with exercise, that, is super important to, um, build kind of
12:35
vocabulary around is, um, naming what, what your relationship with movement is
12:45
like and, and kind of challenging yourself to pause or, or take a minute to even
12:51
explore, okay, this, this thing that I do every day, do I actually like doing it?
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Um, do I actually like getting up at five o'clock and going to this?
13:02
Whatever it is.
13:02
I don't, I don't want to like shame any form of like, you
13:05
know, sure, exercise or whatever.
13:06
But, um, um, because the reality is even the bar class that you go to can't could
13:13
turn into something unhealthy right now.
13:14
Not that I'm saying it's going to for you, but it doesn't matter what it is.
13:18
Right.
13:18
Um, um, and so, and so challenging yourself to, to build some
13:25
language around, um, what, it.
13:28
What your relationship is like with movement, I think is really important.
13:31
Like you kind of, yeah, yeah.
13:33
Yeah.
13:34
And you know, before we talk about the gifts of moving our body, right.
13:38
Which our bodies, which is such, I think it is such a gift kind of just echoing.
13:43
Yeah.
13:44
Looking at the language, looking at, um, you know, is this fun for me?
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Is it rule driven?
13:50
Is it inflexible?
13:52
One thing too, that I'll, I'll talk about with clients is whether they can.
13:56
refrain from exercise on vacation, or if they're sick, right?
14:02
Like both of those feel like the two most common that we
14:05
see in the practice, Lauren.
14:07
Yeah.
14:07
And I don't know if you would add anything, but like, yeah, if you're
14:09
on vacation and you can't take a break from exercise, or you feel like you have
14:16
to exercise for one reason or another, It might be time to re evaluate your
14:20
relationship with exercise or if you're sick and you feel an incredible amount of
14:24
shame or guilt that you can't exercise, it might be time to re evaluate your
14:28
relationship with exercise or movement.
14:31
Um, Yeah.
14:32
And, and, yeah, go ahead.
14:34
No, I was just thinking too as you're talking, um, you know, I
14:39
can, I, I, just like playing devil, devil's advocate a little bit.
14:44
You know, if I'm, if I'm a listener and.
14:47
I've got a pretty, you know, strict, if you will, kind of exercise routine.
14:53
I exercise six days a week.
14:56
It, it feels like really important to me to do that.
14:59
And I'm listening and, and I'm overall a fairly healthy
15:04
person physically, whatever.
15:07
I, I can imagine maybe somebody asking the question, Well,
15:10
what's the point of reevaluating my relationship with exercise?
15:13
Like, why?
15:14
Why are we doing this?
15:15
Why are we talking about this?
15:17
Right.
15:17
Um, because I can imagine a client asking me that.
15:21
Right.
15:21
So I'm just like, thinking through because that might, you know, that may be helpful
15:26
or valuable for some of our listeners to kind of hear us talk through a little bit.
15:30
And, you know, I think the biggest thing, and maybe one of the things that we as
15:34
therapists are paying attention to with our clients, especially like kind of early
15:39
on in the assessment phase, is what are you, what, what are you presenting with?
15:43
What's going on in your life?
15:45
Um, and like, what's not working, what's getting in the way?
15:51
of you doing the things you want or feeling the way you want to feel
15:55
or living the life you want to live and how life interfering is that.
15:59
And so that's like a big, that can be a big Um, uh, quite or a helpful
16:04
question to ask when you're like, okay, Laura's saying these things.
16:09
Maybe that is a red flag for me Maybe that is a red flag for me and then asking okay,
16:15
how do I know how life interfering is it?
16:17
Like how how much How much is it interfering with my life that I have
16:22
to get up every single morning at 5 a.
16:24
m.
16:24
and go exercise?
16:25
Or, after work I have to go every single day to the gym and go exercise.
16:29
Like what, how is that interfering with my life?
16:32
How is that interfering with my values?
16:34
Right, we talk a lot about values on, on, on the podcast.
16:36
And so, um, is, is this keeping me from, living in my values that maybe
16:46
I've done some work around identifying.
16:47
So I don't know, Lauren, do you have any other thoughts around like kind of the,
16:51
the why of kind of why we're talking about this or why, why we would be reevaluating?
16:59
Yeah.
16:59
Yeah.
17:00
So one thing that I adore about Lauren and I feel like I learned from her when she
17:05
talks to you guys on, on these episodes or, you know, just as we're, talking,
17:10
you know, about cases or consulting.
17:12
She has so much depth, right?
17:14
Because it's not, you know, just, just stop, just stop exercising or reduce
17:18
exercising and like be done with it.
17:20
Right.
17:20
We have to understand.
17:22
The why and what Lauren's talking about, those life interfering behaviors.
17:26
I can give maybe a practical example.
17:28
Yeah, totally.
17:29
Um, so if you're, you know, if you're at the beach with your family and everyone
17:36
else is going to a yummy breakfast and You don't really want to go for
17:41
a run, but you feel like you have to because otherwise you're breaking this
17:44
rule, and that is really distressing.
17:46
So that would be an example of a life interfering behavior where, you know, it's
17:52
not necessarily the run itself, which we could argue that there is a time and place
17:57
to evaluate, like, when exercise becomes compulsive, but it's the fact that it is
18:02
interfering with your time with family or friends, and you know, This sweet,
18:07
precious time away from work to connect with the people that you love and care
18:12
about over a yummy breakfast, that's the life interfering nature of a problematic
18:19
relationship with exercise, right?
18:22
And for the record, if you do have a healthy relationship with exercise and
18:25
you choose to go for a walk or run or do whatever you do instead of going to
18:29
breakfast, there's nothing inherently wrong with that, but it's the bigger
18:32
picture of the pattern of behavior that's.
18:36
That's happening, if you will.
18:38
So that's really a practical example.
18:40
And then I think what Lauren's talking about, the depth of anytime
18:44
we change or we're maybe considering changing a behavior that is, you
18:49
know, going on in our lives, we have to really understand the why.
18:53
And so really looking at all the pieces of the puzzle of the consequences of my
19:00
current relationship with exercise, right?
19:02
So does it.
19:03
You know, not allow me to have time off or spend time with family or
19:08
are, are there, what happens when I, when I break one of my rule and
19:12
it rules and air quotations, right?
19:14
So if you're watching on, on YouTube, uh, the air quotations are there,
19:17
but yeah, it's like, what happens?
19:19
How distressing is it to me if I can't exercise?
19:23
And those are all kind of questions in the therapeutic
19:26
space that we would ask clients.
19:28
That are rooted in motivational interviewing.
19:30
Yeah.
19:31
Yeah.
19:33
Yeah this morning.
19:34
So Laura and I we both do bar classes I've found over the years as I have
19:41
Experimented with my relationship with movement and I like to call it movement.
19:46
That just feels more authentic to me and more intuitive to me.
19:50
Um, and so I have found over the years that I, the way that I love
19:56
to move the most is either in some kind of group setting, like some
20:02
kind of like group class, if you will, that's like not high impact.
20:07
That's like a little bit more gentle on my body and or Doing things like around
20:13
the house or like doing like yard work or something Those those feel like the
20:20
ways that I like to move and a little bit of a caveat, too I think we can in our
20:25
culture we can identify as we can identify exercises just going to the gym just doing
20:31
a workout class just sweating profusely and burning X amount of calories, right?
20:38
And, and we, we are less inclined to identify things like yard work
20:43
or housework or running around the park with your toddler or
20:46
running errands as movement.
20:48
And there's such value and probably such joy we can get from those
20:54
areas of, you know, of movement that we can oftentimes dismiss.
20:58
Um, and so just that little caveat there.
21:01
Um, um, but I, um, So we both take this like bar class and this morning I had
21:09
planned to go to a class and I woke up and I kind of had a headache and my son
21:15
got up early and we were on the sofa and he was just cuddling with me and I was
21:19
reading my book and had my coffee and I was like, man, I just don't want to go.
21:24
Like I don't want to get up.
21:25
I don't want to go.
21:25
I don't feel like it.
21:27
And that, wasn't enough for me.
21:30
Like, I was, I just didn't go.
21:31
And so, um, you know, I think that is such a gift to me as I, as, as
21:37
my relationship with movement has really evolved over the years.
21:40
Having that permission to, um, to not do something maybe that I had
21:45
planned for movement wise, um, And, and for that to just be okay.
21:52
Yeah, yeah.
21:53
Yeah, and there's, because you've done a lot of internal and even external work
21:57
around your, you know, how diet culture maybe has impacted you and your story, I
22:01
would imagine that there's very little if, you know, if not at all, no, no stress,
22:06
distress at all around not going, right?
22:09
You're like, okay, I made this decision and this is what's best for me and my
22:11
family this morning and we move on.
22:13
That, in my opinion, is indicative of a healthy relationship with, with movement.
22:20
And yeah, I think, you know, sometimes like we've talked about this compulsive,
22:26
you know, relationship with exercise or movement, what can happen if we
22:30
do have that in our story, then we can also become avoidant of movement.
22:36
That's very different than like Lauren deciding that she doesn't
22:38
want to go to the glass this morning.
22:40
Right.
22:41
Um, but we can start to fear.
22:45
movement or fear exercise because that has been a pain point in our stories.
22:50
And so if you are doing any sort of recovery work in the, in the sense of, you
22:56
know, body image recovery, or maybe you're in recovery from an eating disorder.
23:00
We did want to make sure we talk about that as well and
23:04
name how common that is, right?
23:06
Like you're not alone.
23:08
Yeah, if you have experienced that, that swing, that is quite common.
23:12
And we do see that really often in the practice as well.
23:17
Um, one thing that's coming to mind as I'm talking, I feel like sometimes, and
23:23
none of us, Nobody's perfect, right?
23:26
But I feel like sometimes the messaging that can happen even
23:29
within the eating disorder recovery space is that exercise is bad.
23:33
Yeah.
23:34
Or moving your body is bad.
23:36
Yeah.
23:36
And I think we're getting better, like as, as clinicians or as providers at
23:41
really honing in on the nuances of each client's relationship with exercise.
23:46
But that is one thing that I have found, at least in my career, is clients will
23:49
come to us and they're like, wait.
23:52
I thought that I wasn't supposed to, like, exercise ever again.
23:55
And so even, I think, within the eating disorder recovery space, we can get
23:59
caught up in this black and white kind of belief system around exercise movement
24:04
that is problematic in and of itself.
24:06
Because when we're moving our bodies in ways that are attuned and present and
24:12
we're able to, you know, Take breaks and not do the class if we had planned for it.
24:17
That is actually really healthy for us and it's, it's a way for us to like move
24:22
through stress or difficult emotions that might be stored up in our bodies.
24:27
Like, it's a way to have fun and meet some friends at a class or whatever,
24:32
whatever you do for your movement.
24:34
And so I did want to talk about that.
24:35
I think that this avoidance piece, there's maybe many factors here, but one of them
24:39
is is the messaging, at least that I've heard from clients, around like, oh wait,
24:45
do I have permission to move my body?
24:47
Like, I thought I wasn't supposed to ever want to exercise again.
24:49
And it's like this, you know, final kind of decision that's made.
24:53
Yeah.
24:53
So I'm sure you've seen that too, Lauren.
24:55
Yes, totally.
24:56
Totally.
24:57
Well, and I think too, maybe those of us who have, like you said, in
25:01
our story have exercised, Compulsive exercising, eating disorder,
25:07
disordered eating, anything like that.
25:09
We can tend towards maybe more heavily like black and white
25:14
thinking, all or nothing thinking.
25:16
Not that we're not all prone to that.
25:18
We're all human, right?
25:19
And I think that can be in our human nature.
25:20
But, um, I think the, the swing from over exercising to exercise
25:27
avoidance can, can, um, be a part of that kind of all or nothing.
25:33
Like if I can't exercise five days a week, I'm not going to exercise at all.
25:37
Um, and so, you know, that black and white kind of mentality or cognitive
25:41
distortion can also be something to pay attention to and notice when
25:45
that's like showing up for you.
25:47
Um, because that distortion can, again, kind of, Get in the way, be life
25:52
interfering, um, keep you from living in your values, um, keep you from being
25:59
attuned to your body, embodied, right?
26:04
Listening to your intuition around what you need or what you want that day.
26:09
So, because I think that's that's certainly part of what what my
26:15
experience was kind of coming out of that high intensity, you know, Ballet
26:19
world into real world, so to speak.
26:24
I mean, it's a little bit of a la la land over there, but that's,
26:27
yeah, that's for another day.
26:29
Um, so.
26:31
Yeah, yeah.
26:32
Yeah, yeah.
26:35
There's lots of things to you here that we, you know, could
26:39
speak further on, if you will.
26:42
You know, there's some clients that have had a traumatic experience with their
26:48
bodies or with a coach or with exercise in general, and they, they might benefit
26:55
from taking a full break from exercise.
26:58
And I've certainly recommended that to clients.
27:01
And then resuming once they've We do more of the, the therapeutic work.
27:06
There's other clients that really benefit from a more of a harm, what we
27:12
call in the therapeutic space a harm reduction model, which is, okay, I'm
27:15
exercising six or seven days a week.
27:17
Can I take it down to five and then three, and then maybe take a break for a week
27:21
or two and see what that feels like.
27:22
So there's lots of different kind of therapeutic interventions that we
27:26
would do with clients around this.
27:29
You know, targeting some of this maladaptive behavior, if you
27:34
will, that occurs around exercise.
27:37
And then two, just like asking questions of like, is that fun for you?
27:42
How does your body feel before and after movement?
27:47
What are the rules that might be there?
27:49
You know, all of those things I think can just be helpful kind
27:53
of questions to ask yourself.
27:55
In your relationship with exercise, I know we talked about this a little
27:59
bit, but what'd you observe in your, in your family growing up?
28:02
How was exercise talked about?
28:04
Like, who are your friends in your lives?
28:06
And then how do they talk about their own relationships with exercise?
28:09
Friends, colleagues, parents, whoever it might be, right?
28:12
So those are all kind of just questions for you all to start perhaps
28:16
asking yourself and getting more curious about as you investigate
28:20
your relationship with exercise.
28:23
Yeah.
28:24
Yeah, well, and just like, you know, just like our bodies have a need
28:31
for rest, or for slowing down or for being still, biologically, you
28:39
know, physiologically, we Need eight hours of sleep every night, right?
28:44
That kind of thing.
28:45
I, I think our, our bodies also Inherently want to move in some way
28:53
And again, I think our culture has just kind of turned it into this trendy,
28:59
like, pedestal thing and And I wonder if it doesn't have to be as like
29:05
complex and grandiose as that, right?
29:08
Like it can be something a little bit more organic and authentic and, um, and,
29:19
and personal or, or then, you know, then I think what culture has made it out to
29:24
be, and I know that that can be such hard work to do kind of untangling ourself
29:29
and, and, and our, you know, stuff from.
29:32
From all the things that culture tells us about who we should be, and
29:36
what we should be doing, and what we should look like, and all of that.
29:39
And so, um, I get that.
29:41
I, you know, just because we're therapists, and just because, you
29:45
know, we sometimes have all these cool therapy things to say, doesn't mean
29:50
we don't live in this culture too.
29:53
Um, so, so, yeah, I, I, I, I wonder, you know, What it could be like for all of us
30:01
to just bring, bring this idea of movement down from this like pedestal, just back
30:07
down to earth and exploring it from like that, that lens a little bit more.
30:12
Yeah.
30:13
Yeah.
30:13
Yeah.
30:14
Well, maybe that can be our listeners homework when you said pedestal.
30:17
Yeah.
30:18
The word that came to mind for me was like this performative
30:22
role driven thing that we start.
30:25
And it's so interesting.
30:26
We do it with so many things, right?
30:28
Not just exercise, but.
30:30
Yeah, our culture is, is good at taking something that is meant to be joyful
30:35
and a way to connect with ourselves and others and kind of twisting it.
30:39
Yeah.
30:39
And so I love that.
30:41
Maybe our listeners can take that as homework, right?
30:45
Yeah.
30:45
Yeah.
30:47
Yeah.
30:49
I, I mean, you know, I think just this kind of overarching
30:55
idea of re reevaluating, right?
30:59
Like I want to challenge everybody, maybe just to like, Take some time over the
31:03
next few weeks just to just pause and to maybe it's through journaling Maybe
31:09
it's just through like thinking kind of in your own mind Maybe it's like talking
31:13
with a friend or a partner or whatever About just like about your relationship
31:18
with exercise how you exercise why you do it what motivates you what
31:27
What maybe are some rules that are a part of your, you know, exercise experience?
31:35
What language would you use to describe your relationship with exercise?
31:39
And then is there anything about it that maybe needs to change?
31:46
So it's twofold.
31:47
I love it.
31:48
Yeah, and I mean there's a couple different affirmations that are
31:50
coming to mind, I guess, depending on where you are on your journey today.
31:55
I mean, I think first and foremost, just like an abundance of kindness for you.
31:59
So just this idea that I give myself kindness and self compassion as I'm
32:04
exploring my relationship with movement.
32:06
Um, and then if you're, you know, already in this spot where you are exploring it,
32:12
I think, you know, another affirmation could be that I'm capable of moving my
32:15
body in ways that are nurturing to me.
32:18
So I love this.
32:19
It's really this idea of nurturing myself.
32:22
And so, uh, thank you so much for being here for this episode.
32:25
We hope it's been helpful for you all, um, on the Becoming Anchored
32:29
podcast and we will see you next time.
32:30
Bye guys.
32:30
Take care.
32:31
Bye.