Shows / 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Conor Lastowka and Michael J. Nelson are reading books they're pretty sure they're going to hate. Read along with us for a podcast book clubs of Ready Player One, Armada, The Eye of Argon, Dan Brown, and more!
Episodes
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 63 – Shadow Moon: Episoude the Fourth
A jam-packed episode made all the more thrilling because Mike’s computer crashed twice while making it. Was it ensorcelled by a HardDriveHeron with…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 62 – Llamacorn sez, “Well coat my meat in peanut sauce, it’s a new ep!”
Gather round victuallers and chandlers, alike! Lacquer your fur down and join us as we dig further into the Thillow-verse. Can Mike get a soild D or D- in Real…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 61 – Don’t Put Ketchup on your Death Dog
Ah, Shadow Moon… That’s a name we haven’t heard in a long time… Well, a week at least! Join us as we continue our deep dive into the…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 60 – This Podcast is now named Thorn Drumheller
Step into the WillowVerse for our first discussion of George Lucas & Chris Claremont’s “SHADOW MOON”! Things get sexy right off the bat, and…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 59 – Book 10
Cline Cline Theis Shatlart Thrash Pappy James Harris Stoker… Who’s next? Listen and find out! (Hey! Patreon supporters have known about this book…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 58 – China Worm Sunflower
Three hypnotizing attempts, two destroyed castles, and countless walnuts later, Lair of The White Worm comes to an end. Break out the medium-grade china and…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 57 – Well Hung Doors
It’s our third episode discussing Bram Stoker’s “Lair of the White Worm”. If you like coherent horror stories, we apologize. But as a…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 56 – For the Benefit of Evil Bird Kite
To say that LOTWW took an unexpected turn in this section would be a slap in the face to unexpected turns. While it appeared to be inching (worm pun) its way…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 55 – A Very Special Mongoose
Bram, (or is it pronounced Bram) Stoker’s Dracula followup The Lair of the White Worm, is not very good. But there’s a lot to discuss! Adam Salton…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 54 – Book 9
We’re on our ninth book! We now have enough bad books to field a baseball team or form our own personal Wu-Tang Clan of crappy literature. No reason to…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 53 – Seven Days of Mystery, Drama, Excitement, Compassion, Horror, and Romance
We finally finish Charles E. Harris aka The Horny Grandpa’s saga Trucking Through Time. Tension is high as we finally will get an answer to our big…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 52 – Hold Onto Your Buckskins
We’ve got a jam-packed penultimate Trucking Through Time episode! Curvy wives! Horny grandpas! Easily accessible caches of cowboy hats! A surprising…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 51 – Grandpa, No!
In between the General reading reports, Trucking Through Time manages to fit in some genuinely insane moments. Our heroes literally get to meet God, and…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 50 – Arthur “Three Socks” Jackson
It’s our 50th episode! And to celebrate, Trucking Through Time gets a little…. sexy! If you thought groins were stirring and tightening in the…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 49 – A Bad Day for the Home Team
Having trucked through time, our heroes Chad Hand and Dale Rhea (seriously) must now deal with the perils of life in the late 17th or early 18th century. This…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 48 – Trucking Through Time
Load your cooler up with knickknacks, good buddy, we’re in for a long haul! This is our first episode covering Charles E. Harris’ “Trucking…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 47 – So do Albanian cars have seatbelts or what?
As we wrap up our deep dive into EL James’ “The Mister”, we have a lot of questions. Well, one question really: What the hell? But also: Why…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 46 – Bleriana’s Bucket
This is now an all Bleriana, all the time podcast. Our favorite unseen character, who may or may not still be a sex slave when this book ends in fifty pages…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 45 – Wherefore Art Thou, Bleriana?
Our second favorite trafficking victim does NOT show up in this section of The Mister, but other than that, it’s jam packed. Anesthesia, post-trauma…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 44 – Male Tasting Fingers
This episode is nearly two hours long, despite the fact that if you cut out all the sex from these five chapters, all our characters did was buy shoes and play…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 43 – Music for your what now?
WARNING: This section of The Mister may contain the dumbest sentence we’ve ever covered on this show. Join us in pastoral Cornwall, where Maxim and the…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 42 – Not A Groin Was Stirring
In part two of our deep dive into The Mister, author EL James gives her audience exactly what they came for: Sex! Nobody actually having it, of course, but…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 41 – Handsome Buttocks
Who’s ready to get British and horny?? This is our first episode devoted to The Mister by EL James, and it’s obviously unlike anything we’ve…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 40 – Book Number Seven
Time to start our seventh book together! This one promises to be quite the journey. Don’t want to ruin this surprise, so get listening! Oh and by the…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 39 – Broken Camera Blues
We are back after a week in Nashville! While we were there, we figured that we would take advantage of the opportunity to record face to face. So we recorded a…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 38 – 160 Pages We’ll Never Get Back
Thank god this book was not 372 pages long. Neither of us could have handled that. Bob Honey was fortunately only 160, and even so, managed to have three…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 37 – I Laugh a lot When I Write
Our favorite unreliable narrator who is also a toilet salesman/mallet assassin is back to bring his book into the homestretch! We’ve got brand new…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 36 – We’re Baffled By The Cherry Water
The enigma that is Bob Honey continues to baffle and frustrate us. From offering guests a drink that no human has ever consumed (and they accept??), to…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 35 – Uh… OK?
Sean Penn certainly has written a collective of words arranged into sentences! There’s a lot to discuss in our first episode diving into Bob Honey Who…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 34 – A 160 Page Self-Own
Well, here is the new book we all get to read together! We apologize for nothing!! And hey, a bunch of listeners requested this one, so if you want someone to…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 33 – Checkmate
All good things must come to an end. On a completely unrelated note, this book also must come to an end. And what an ending it is! After pages and pages of…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 32 – Ctrl-V, Repeat
Who is the Sheriff of 372 Pages? Sorry, just trying out our new catchphrase. Nobody better be laughing!! We have an absolutely jam packed episode this week…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 31 – I, Titus Uno
Assemble your various financial certification acronyms and have Veronica Jackson clear your schedule, because we’ve got a doozy of an episode! So much to…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 30 – Manifesto in Book Form
Well, we’ve found a new book to read together, and it certainly appears to be something special. More in the vein of “Eye of Argon”, this is…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 29 – What The Hell Was That?
Well, the pace sure as hell was unrelenting, folks. We’ve reached the end of TekWar, and there both is and isn’t a lot to talk about. Chest-high…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 28 – Al’s House of Lucite
If you’d told us way back in Episode 25 – Meetings About Sonny Hokori, if we’d still be having meetings about Sonny Hokori 150 pages later…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 27 – A Heavy Airquotes Simple Plan
Chapter 22 of Tekwar may be the second stupidest chapter we’ve read on this podcast. The first, of course, being the one in Armada where The Emissary…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 26 – Located in the Exact Center of your Podcast App
Roll your cartoon wolf tongues back into your mouths, we’ve got a new episode! This week we finally get to meet the lusted after Beth Kittridge……
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 25 – Meetings About Sonny Hokori
Look, we all love Sonny Hokori and Bennet Sands and Dr. Kittridge’s insanely hot daughter. We love to hear Jake discuss those people in quirky alleys…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 24 – ¡El Pelo Hinchable!
To the inattentive and brainless layman* it might appear that not much happened during this stretch of TekWar. Mostly Jake aka Jonatha and Juanito aka The…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 23 – Plasepisode Plastwenty Plasthree
Steeple your chrome fingers against your chrome nose and tell maw to cork it, here’s our first Tekwar episode! We’ve got a ton to cover here: the…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 22 – Book Four Reveal!
Let’s not delay this any longer: We’ve got a new book picked out to read together, and by all accounts it’s gonna be a doozy. So let’s…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 21 – Mo’ Shamen, Maw Problems
It feels like we just started Grignr’s journey, but it’s already time to finish The Eye of Argon. Fortunately, the second half is just as amazing…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 20 – Hope You Like Adjectives!
Wow! The Eye of Argon more than surpassed our expectations. Our ovals widened rotundly with every additional sentence Theis crafted. My god, the first four…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 19 – The Eye of Argon
We teased it in our last episode, but we’re finally ready to reveal to you: our next book is called The Eye of Argon. We figured, what could possibly…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 18 – A Crummy Commercial
We are back! Don’t worry, there is no new Ernest Cline book. But we’ve decided to launch back up to try to tackle some books which may be just as…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 17 – We’ll Do It Live… Or Will We?
Recorded live at Sisyphus Brewing in Minneapolis on April 11th, this is our first ever live show… Is how this post used to start before the recording of…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 16 – And Then All That Happened, The End
When we last left Zack Lightman, he was submerged beneath the Antarctic Ocean, trying to retrieve his father and save the world. But then it was getting close…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 15 – Some Light, Pre-Apocalypse Boning
As humanity’s potential end draws near, our heroes still have not been allowed to say goodbye to their loved ones back on Earth. So they all do what any…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 14 – A General Uses the Term “Snackage”
The Europan death armada is just hours away, and mankind’s last defense force is behaving about how you’d expect: grinning, crushing hard, and…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 13 – Or as it Came to be Known, Episode 13
The calendars may say that it’s March, but to us it’s Clinetober! Here at 372 Pages we’re power-leaping into the month like a terrible…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 12 – The Hot Geek Girl Laughed at my Episode Title
Mike and Conor cover an absolutely thrilling stretch of Armada in this episode. Hold your breath because we’re about to discuss all of this: not one but…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 11 – Insanely hot (but relateable) moms
In this episode we meet Zack’s insanely hot TV addicted gamer mom. Turns out the Hot but Relateable Mom trope isn’t just a Clineian invention, and…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 10 – What Have We Done?
In this first fifty pages of Armada, our hero sees a flying saucer, reads a giant list of movie release dates, and then goes to work. Somehow we talked about…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 9 – Season 2: Armada
We’re back with a new season! Join us as we read Ernest Cline’s followup to RP1, Armada. We’re extremely excited to read what is widely…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 8 – 1980s Reference
Support the podcast on Patreon to get every episode a week early, and a ton of other exclusive content: patreon.com/372pages Get the book here We’re…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 7 – 1973 Was My Favorite Year in the 80s
Support the podcast on Patreon to get every episode a week early, and a ton of other exclusive content: patreon.com/372pages Get the book here In this episode…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 6 – Rush for a Change of Atmosphere
Support the podcast on Patreon to get every episode a week early, and a ton of other exclusive content: patreon.com/372pages Get the book here Join us in our…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 5 – Several Discreet Openings
Support the podcast on Patreon to get every episode a week early, and a ton of other exclusive content: patreon.com/372pages Get the book here This week…
- 372 Pages We'll Never Get Back
Episode 4 – Delightful 80’s References and Several Hundred Dead Children!
Support the podcast on Patreon to get every episode a week early, and a ton of other exclusive content: patreon.com/372pages Get the book here We’ll…