Shows / The Opinion Machine???
Episodes
- The Opinion Machine???
#42 Murder/Suicide Advice (Totes Fictional)
#42 Vigilante Justice, Assisted Murder & A Fun Abortion Story Aka: If you’re gonna do it, keep it to yourself.
- The Opinion Machine???
#40 Park Parking & Puppy Panic
#40 Irrational Fear, Rational Concern & The Full Blown Terror Of Tunnels. Aka: Peanut Butter Won’t Fix This.
- The Opinion Machine???
#41 Wheelchair Wisdom
#41 Laziness As Virtue, No Such Thing As Wasted Time & Finally Learning When To Shut Up. Aka: Wisdom Is Knowing How To Pick Your Battles.
- The Opinion Machine???
#39 Doublewinger
#39 You Got Yer Left Wing, You Got Yer Right Wing, & Still Only Fly In Dreams. Aka: Juvenile analogies are fine if they still work.
- The Opinion Machine???
#38 Sanctimonious Humor Critique
#38 Shaming Jon Stewart, Praising Daniel Tosh, & Self Deprecation As Magnanimous Public Service. Aka: Taking oneself too seriously is unintentionally hilarious…
- The Opinion Machine???
#37 Patriotic Flaggotry
#37 Personal Flags, Club Flags & Gay Flags. Aka: what do we gotta do to actually get along?
- The Opinion Machine???
#36 True Believers Repeating Lies
#36 Blatant Liars, Trusting Repeaters, & How Lies Seem Truer The Further They Float Downstream. Aka: Do your due diligence or keep your yap shut.
- The Opinion Machine???
#35 I Hate Hate Crime.
#35 Hate Misdemeanors, Hate Code Violations, & Penalizing Putting Pudding Pops Into Pants Pockets & Purses. Aka: Your smile is hateful.
- The Opinion Machine???
#34 Toxic Masculinity Is Totally Real
Terrible Teenagers, Ornery Old Folks & 3.5 Billion Unintentional Assholes. Aka: I pity the foolery of Mr. (Low) T.
- The Opinion Machine???
#33 Tattoos Are For Idiots!!!
#33 Cowardly Zebras, Ridiculous Firemen & Lying Ass Laser Removers Aka: How dare you seek love & attention.
- The Opinion Machine???
#32 Guns Are For Pussies.
Skinny Little Arms, Boob-Like Hands & Unable To Run More Than A Block Without Collapsing. Aka: Guns are definitely, absolutely, no doubt about it, for pussies.
- The Opinion Machine???
#31 Powerful Pedophiles
Alex “PizzaGate” Jones, The Spectrum Of Evil, & Conspiracy Theory As Investigative Journalism. Aka: my dichotomous joy in maybe being wrong about the seemingly…
- The Opinion Machine???
#30 Fake Antiques & Phony Spirituality
Impostor Snake Charmers, Fraudulent Australian Alligator Farmers, & 45 Year Old Kindergarteners. AKA: Your artificially aged cowboy hat blows your cover.
- The Opinion Machine???
#29 Another Lesson On Independence
Never Make Quick Decisions In Reno, No Good Deed Goes Unpunished, & How Reliance Upon Others Is Key To Disappointment. Aka: Independence is good.
- The Opinion Machine???
#28 So You Think I'm Stupid?
Underestimating The Mentally Challenged, Overestimating Your Own Intelligence, & Consequence Free Smugnicity. Aka: why so many idiots think they are smarter…
- The Opinion Machine???
#27 Star City Piano Van
Star City Music Festival, Awkwardly Accepting Tips, & The Timely Kindness Of The Twisted Sister. Aka: You try singing sappy songs in front of random strangers.
- The Opinion Machine???
#26 The Opinion Machine Feed
Here An Opinion, There An Opinion & None As Good As Mine. AKA: what you need is another fuckin’ podcast.
- The Opinion Machine???
#25 Hawaiian Death Punch
My Polynesian Step Family, Driving In Circles, & All Expenses Paid Retirement In A Tropical Paradise. Aka: Who do I gotta kill to join the Hawaiian brotherhood?
- The Opinion Machine???
#24 Barbara Streisand & The Forbidden Fredo
How Chris Cuomo Earned His Nickname, Jesus Sucked Up To The Big Man, & I Tricked My Way Through The Bishop’s Interview. Aka: How to ban your way to stardom.
- The Opinion Machine???
#23 Unnecessary Introductions
Getting To The Fucking Point, Cowardly Internet Snitchery, & The Dubious Future Of Digital Meteorology. AKA: Amish barn raising looks more appealing every day.
- The Opinion Machine???
#22 Swipe Right - Swipe Wrong
The Harsh Reality Of Conditional Nudity, The Myth of Unconditional Love, & The Pervasive Cruelty Of Swipe Leftists. AKA: It’s a miracle people aren’t wearing…
- The Opinion Machine???
#21 The Smartest Guy You Know
Fat Albert Einstein Can’t Dance, Stephen Hawkings Can’t Kick A Field Goal, & Michael Jordan Forgot Where He Left His Keys. AKA: Everyone is retarded.
- The Opinion Machine???
#19 Phobophobia
Killer Bees, Exploding Bee Keepers, & The Irrational Fear Of Red Leather Pants. AKA: Being skeptical, critical, cautious and wary ain’t nothin of which to be…
- The Opinion Machine???
#18 The "Real" Me
Old Dudes Watercoloring, Young Dudes Fixing Race Cars, & An Endless Stream Of Dog Rescue Videos. AKA: Social Media doesn’t really give an accurate picture of…
- The Opinion Machine???
#17 The Joke Police
Howard Stern Finds Jesus, David Letterman Turns Into Mother Teresa, & Maddox Unironically Clutches His Self Administered Pearl Necklace. AKA: Jesus ain’t known…
- The Opinion Machine???
#16 Wooden Spoons & Bare Little Butts
The Penis/Vagina Shouting Match, Claw Marks To Match My Freckles, & How Bruised Egos Lead To Bruised Bodies. AKA: It’s surprising there aren’t mass shootings…
- The Opinion Machine???
#15 Congratulations, You Blend In!
A Big Dumb Cowboy Hat, A Frumpy Forgettable Girl, & A Whore In Red Leather (Tits To Toes). Aka: It’s not my fault I don’t remember you.
- The Opinion Machine???
#14 Individual Justice n Shit
Mathematically Induced Rage, Defiant Popcorn Revenge, & Why I Hated School. Aka: These obedient idiots are NOT my people!
- The Opinion Machine???
#13 Drunken Facebook Anal Ysis.
Having My First Drink At 33, 13 Subsequent Years Of Catch-up, & Losing Interest In Booze As I Lost Interest In Strangers. Aka: I recognize drunk facebooking…
- The Opinion Machine???
#12 The Accidental Impressionist
Artist Of The Year, Juvenile Photo Realism, & The Crushing Melancholy Of Valiant Best Efforts. AKA An ironic, low effort plea of: can you at least TRY!?
- The Opinion Machine???
#11 The Cult of Climate Change
- Prophets For Profits, Mexican Kids In Cages, & The Ever-Presence Of DoomsDayism. Aka: Your boiling forehead is giving me a sunburn.
- The Opinion Machine???
#10 Dead Horses
- Little Tiny Rocks, Dog’s Ears Flapping, & The Unfathomable Miracle Of Everything. Aka: Don’t Worry So Much.
- The Opinion Machine???
#9 - Dr. Thinskinski
- Thin Skin, Thick Skin & The Subtle Tenderness Of Screaming Out In Pain
- The Opinion Machine???
#6 Chicken 'Lil - Emergency, emergency, human beans!
Emergency, emergency, human beans! HUMAN BEANS!
- The Opinion Machine???
#5 Looks like Mr. Knowitall has some gay little feelings he needs to protect
What a worthless pile of procrastinating poop. Total hypocrite, that Merkley.
- The Opinion Machine???
#4 Two “Rare” Amazonian Tribesmen Walk Into A Video Store...
And then what happened?