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D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Helping you have happy healthy power exchange relationships
Episodes
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Being Your Partner’s Safe Person
This week’s episode doesn’t focus on risk mitigation and safety practices in kink play. We’re talking about what it means to be safe for your…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Submissives Using Signals to Communicate Desire
I have no idea how to title this week’s episode, lol. But it’s a thing we kind of talked about in last week’s Reddit episode and a thing that…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Kink Terms Evolve
For better or worse, language changes over time — including the terms we use in kink. These are our chaotic, messy thoughts on those changes. In this…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Emotional Intelligence and Power Exchange
Emotional intelligence and emotional regulation is extremely important for communication and happy, healthy power exchange relationships. In this episode: Join…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Love Maps and Power Exchange
The idea of love maps comes from the Gottman Institute in their studies on relationships, specifically marriage. We wondered if it could be applied to power…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Silly Conflicts in Our Power Exchange
We needed something lighthearted this week, so we’re taking a look at some of the silly little “arguments” we get into. In this episode: Our…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Q&A: How Do I Support a Partner Who Doesn’t Take Criticism Well?
A submissive agreed to their partner “No” on agreed upon topics, but their partner reacts in a way that’s causing resentment. The submissive…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Dominants and Communication
We didn’t know where this would go before we started other than saying, “Yes, Doms need to communicate effectively, too.” (Obviously.) JB…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Radical Honesty in Power Exchange
A moment when Kayla admitted wrongdoing has us thinking about the concept of “radical honesty” which potentially has a deeper meaning for kinksters…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Over Communication in Power Exchange
Most kinksters aren’t communicating too much, but some of us (like Kayla) could be, so let’s talk about it. In this episode: We need your questions…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Q&A: Is My Dom the Problem or Am I?
A submissive has a recurring issue about aftercare with their Dominant partner and wants to know: are they the problem or is it me? Here’s the question…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
How Do I Negotiate When They Want to Experiment With Kink?
In this week’s episode, someone asks how to negotiate with someone who doesn’t even really know if they like kink yet. Here’s the question…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Can a Submissive Negotiate Their Rewards?
In this week’s Q&A episode, a submissive likes the positive reinforcement of rewards in their dynamic, but they don’t feel like they’re…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Navigating Stress Before It Happens in D/s Relationships
(UPDATE: We no longer endorse TJ) This week’s episode is brought to you by our own personal stressors and more inspiration from Therapy Jeff! We’ve…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Answering More Non-Kinky Relationship Questions
This week, we’re answering more non-kinky relationship questions. These came from a marriage coach on Instagram who labeled these questions as…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Mental Load in Power Exchange
This week, we’re talking about the mental load each partner carries in power exchange. It’s a topic that touches on a lot of previous…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Answering Relationship Questions to Reconnect
We’re back with another episode where we answer relationship questions we found online. These questions are meant to help partners get back in touch with…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
How Our D/s Negotiations Have Changed Over Time
We’re hitting a lot of milestones after 10 years in a D/s relationship. One we didn’t expect is that how we’re negotiating parts of our…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Revisiting Episode 2: How to Talk to Your Dominant
We’re continuing with the exercise of revisiting old episodes from the archive from before we had lengthy conversations about kinky topics. This week…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Minisode 39: Negotiation Tips
In this week’s minisode, we share a few tips, tricks, and truths we’ve learned about negotiation in power exchange. Simply put, negotiation is a…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
How We Explore New Kinks Together | 30 Days of D/s
We’re fairly set in our ways at this point in life. We know what we like, and we tend to stick with it. It probably has something to do with how…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Minisode 32: Asking Your Dominant for What You Want
A common struggle of many submissives is learning how to ask for what they need and want. It’s especially hard when you believe that a Dominant is always…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
How to Know When You Have Consent | 30 Days of D/s
We’ve talked about consent a LOT around here. (Scroll to the end for a list if you want to deep-dive into this topic). And we’ll continue doing so…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
7 Safeword Tips to Keep in Mind Before, During, and After You Get Kinky | 30 Days of D/s
We believe every kinkster should have a safeword. Yes, we know, some people don’t “believe” in them (safewords aren’t unicorns or…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
How to Be a Better Communicator | 30 Days of D/s
Communication comes in many forms and isn’t always as simple as opening your mouth and letting the words tumble out. But if you want a power exchange…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Advocating for Yourself in BDSM
The word “advocacy” in terms of power exchange and BDSM has been on our minds a lot lately, so it’s time to do an episode about it. We used a…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Figuring Out Our Apology Language
We’ve talked about love languages before, and we’ve talked about making mistakes and needing to apologize. So imagine our delight when we…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Going to Bed Angry
Most of us have heard the cliched advice, “Never go to bed angry!” Everyone has their own opinion and experience with arguments in relationships…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
What We Can Learn from Hindsight
Have you ever looked back on a break-up or a big argument with your partner, and thought, “I knew something was wrong.”? Yeah, that’s…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Deciding When to Compromise in BDSM and When Not To
In this week’s episode, we take a listener question about BDSM collars and turn it into a larger discussion on compromise (yes, we’ve done that…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Podcast Minisode 9: Things to Say in Your D/s Relationship
Part of this week’s episode will sound similar to last week when we talked about gratitude. Why? Because one of the things you should say regularly in…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Podcast Minisode 8: How to Show Gratitude
Gratitude is a big deal to both of us. It helps keep resentment at bay and makes it easier to take care of each other, even in times of stress or when we…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Our Top Tips for BDSM Communication
We talk about communication ALL THE TIME, but rarely in one episode. This definitely isn’t everything, but if you struggle with communication, this may…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
BDSM Basics: 5 Tips About Negotiation in BDSM
Check out a new thing we’re doing — BDSM Basics. We’ve been sharing “5 Things You Should Know” videos on YouTube, and we’re…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Q&A: I Have a Hard Time Asking My Dominant for What I Want
We know, from experience, that when one kinkster has a question, others can benefit from the answer. Going forward, we’ll answer the questions we receive…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Reasons You May Say “No” in a D/s Relationship
Two things to get out of the way immediately. No is a complete sentence. It does not require anything else. Just…no. Second, no is complicated in a power…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Apologies and D/s Relationships
Most of us know that at some point in life, we’re going to be sorry for the way we’ve acted or something we’ve said. The first step in making…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Book Review: Tongue Tied by Stella Harris
*We received Tongue Tied by Stella Harris in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links are included in this post. When I know I’m going to read a…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
15 Things I Used to Believe about BDSM and D/s
We all come to new parts of our life with preconceived notions of what things mean, assuming we’ve been exposed to the idea at all. BDSM wasn’t…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
I Forgot to Focus On Our D/s Relationship
At the end of 2018, as part of a bigger conversation about 2019, John Brownstone asked me, “What would you like to do differently in our D/s next year?…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
3 Conversations We’ve Had With Our Kids about Sex and Kink
We all have our own comfort level when it comes to how much we want our children to know about our personal (sexual and kink) lives and what we believe should…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
5 Secrets You Might Have in a D/s Relationship
Of course every D/s relationship is different, as is every communication style, power dynamic, and the things that make it work between you and another person…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
5 Things You Should Always Say or Hear in Your D/s Relationship
We keep our eyes on the search terms people use to find us here at Loving BDSM, as well as on our personal blogs. And someone searched “10 things to…
- D/s and BDSM Communication Archives • Loving BDSM
Why You Need to Say the Thing You’re Dreading
That thing you want to say but don’t think you should say? You know…the one that might hurt your partner’s feelings or dredge up bad tapes?…