Shows / Ask the Unfaithful
Ask the Unfaithful
The Ask The Unfaithful Podcast, is a safe place for both Unfaithful and Betrayed Partners to find hope and healing. This podcast draws on both our personal and professional experience to provide expert insight into the mind of the Unfaithful, and how their behaviors traumatically affect the life, heart and even brain plasticity of Betrayed Partners. Ask the Unfaithful is hosted by two Unfaithfuls in long-term recovery, James and Sam: Therapist and coach James Annear who co-owns CORE…
Episodes
- Ask the Unfaithful
5 Signs of Emotional Intelligence
How emotionally intelligent are you? What about your partner or spouse, how emotionally intelligent are they? What even is emotional intelligence and why do we…
- Ask the Unfaithful
6 Signs of an Emotional Affair
"Was it actually an emotional affair?" "Was I really sharing too much with them?" "I didn't know I was crossing lines with them, how was I supposed to…
- Ask the Unfaithful
What are 4 Damaging Ways the Unfaithful Seek Attention?
If you're an unfaithful, have you ever considered that perhaps your affair was about seeking attention, affirmation and/or escape? Maybe you're a betrayed and…
- Ask the Unfaithful
What are 5 Smokescreens the Unfaithful Use to Deflect?
Have you ever considered the possibility that we, the unfaithful, massively deflect? If you're a betrayed partner, we're quite positive you've seen us utilize…
- Ask the Unfaithful
What are the 5 Stages of Change for The Unfaithful?
Did you know there are actual stages of change we as human beings go through before we arrive at true change? Did you also know there are stages we unfaithful…
- Ask the Unfaithful
5 Communication Mistakes the Unfaithful Make
Any couple trying to heal from the devastation of infidelity or addiction will attest to the difficulty they have had trying to communicate with their partner…
- Ask the Unfaithful
10 Reasons Why the Unfaithful Self Sabotage
Have you ever wondered, as an unfaithful, "Why do I keep doing this?" "Why do I keep getting in my own way?" "Why is it that no matter what I do, I eventually…
- Ask the Unfaithful
What are the Signs of Denial in the Life of the Unfaithful?
Has your partner ever accused you of being in denial about your choices or the impact of your affair? Maybe your mate continues to communicate to you in a way…
- Ask the Unfaithful
What are the Consequences of Betrayal for the Unfaithful?
Often times a betrayed partner will wonder if the unfaithful actually suffers any consequences due to their choice(s) to go outside the marriage. Betrayeds…
- Ask the Unfaithful
What is Parental Enmeshment and How Does it Affect Affair Recovery?
Have you ever heard of 'Parental Enmeshment?' Adult parental enmeshment is a psychological and relational condition where an adult has an excessively close and…
- Ask the Unfaithful
How Do the Unfaithful Invalidate the Betrayed's Feelings?
Maybe you've said this before or had it said to you, but it's a common yet problematic statement for couples trying to heal from the devastation of infidelity…
- Ask the Unfaithful
5 Ways the Unfaithful are Defensive and Reactive
Have you ever felt like your partner or spouse was consistently defensive and/or overly reactive every time their actions were called into question? It can…
- Ask the Unfaithful
Why are the Unfaithful Dishonest with Themselves?
Have you ever wondered why the unfaithful just isn't getting it? It's like they live in this bubble of self deception, seemingly impenetrable, almost as if…
- Ask the Unfaithful
6 Ways the Unfaithful Retraumatize the Betrayed Partner
In this week's episode James and Sam discuss 6 ways the unfaithful party continues to retraumatize the betrayed partner both knowingly and unknowingly. We'll…
- Ask the Unfaithful
How Can the Unfaithful Stop Draining the Betrayed's Energy?
Despite being well into a couple's recovery journey, the Unfaithful can drain the Betrayed's energy in a myriad of ways - from asking the betrayed to affirm…
- Ask the Unfaithful
Why is Perfectionism so Dangerous for the Unfaithful?
In this episode, Sam and I talk about Perfectionism as it applies in every day life as one of the top reasons for relapse. Where does it come from and why is…
- Ask the Unfaithful
How does the Unfaithful Make Amends Early on in Recovery
The Unfaithful can live in such a way that our life is an amends for the damage we've done. Every day, we can say things and do things that continue to trigger…
- Ask the Unfaithful
What Are the Biggest Red Flags in the Unfaithful's Early Relational Recovery?
"What are the red flags I should be looking for?" is a question James and I receive quite often. It's not only a common question but it's a necessary and…
- Ask the Unfaithful
How Can the Unfaithful Begin to Rebuild Trust in Early Recovery
If there was a word that was both polarizing as well as unsettling for both sides of infidelity, it would be the word trust. How does one win back trust when…
- Ask the Unfaithful
Are All Unfaithfuls Intimacy Avoidant?
What does it mean to be Intimacy Avoidant? What even is intimacy avoidance and am I that? Or, is my partner that? If so, what do we do and how do we heal from…
- Ask the Unfaithful
How is the Unfaithful's Progress in Recovery Measured?
If there was a question I've heard both partners ask time and time again out of desperation, it would be this such question. How do we manage our recovery? How…
- Ask the Unfaithful
Why is Resentment so Destructive in the Life of the Unfaithful?
Resentment in the life of an Unfaithful is not only toxic but can also be paralyzing. Trying to heal themselves as well as their relationship is hard enough…
- Ask the Unfaithful
Is Relapse a Part of Recovery?
It's a normal question for the Betrayed as well as the Unfaithful: Is relapse a part of recovery? If so, why would that ever be necessary and why would the…
- Ask the Unfaithful
What Does Being "All-In" in Recovery Work After Infidelity Look Like?
"Are you 'all in' in your recovery work Sam?" I'll never forget the day my therapist asked me that question so point blank while on his couch. It was a day…
- Ask the Unfaithful
Why Do the Unfaithful Disparage the Betrayed to their Affair Partner?
Have you, as an Unfaithful, disparaged your spouse or partner to your affair partner? Maybe you've shared intimate details about your marriage to your affair…
- Ask the Unfaithful
Why are the Unfaithful so Angry?
Have you ever wondered why, if the Unfaithful was the partner who cheated, they are angry? If you're a Betrayed Partner, it can be hurtful, painful, confusing…