Latest / Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot / Restorative Practice Secret 2/7: Transforming Blame into Solutions

Transcript

Restorative Practice Secret 2/7: Transforming Blame into Solutions · Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot

• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Welcome back to the Sweet Spot where science meets soul.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Today is Take Action Tuesday.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: You're listening to Dr Sweet.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: I'm a board-certified psychiatrist who specializes in high-performance and sports psychiatry and today we're diving deeper into the power of restorative practices, that game-changing approach to building stronger teams, managing competitive stress and reaching peak performance.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: Yesterday we explored relationships and how relationships can fuel success.
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: We discussed the five R's of restorative practice success.
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: We discussed the five R's of restorative practice and before we dive into today's R, let's discuss all of them one more time.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: The five R's of restorative practice are relationship, respect, responsibility, repair and reintegration.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: Now remember, these five principles are very powerful when used together.
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: Today we're going to focus specifically on the second R, which is responsibility.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: And I'm not just talking about owning up to mistakes here.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: I'm talking about transforming how you show up in every moment, adopting a consciousness of being a super responsible being on and off the field.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: Picture this a quarterback throws an interception in the final minutes of the Super Bowl oh, my goodness, no.
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: Or maybe a hockey player takes a penalty that leads to a game-winning power play goal?
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: What about a basketball player who misses crucial free throws at the end of a championship game?
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: Or a soccer player's missed time tackle leading to a game-deciding penalty kick.
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: And now, unless you think this only happens in the sports world, let's transition to the corporate world for a second.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: A CEO, a CEO's maybe delayed decision-making costs a company, a major client.
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: Talk about stress.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: Well, look, these split-second choices and these make-or-break outcomes can be very, very stressful and they can engender blame.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: And this is where responsibility comes in.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: It's not just about taking responsibility for where you messed up.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: It's also about how you respond when people criticize you about messing up.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: And let's go further it's also about how you respond when you're not even at fault and you get to blame.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: This is where restorative practices can be very helpful.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: So look, I've seen it countless of times A player gets fouled hard on the field.
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: In that moment they have a choice Real talk.
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: Moment they have a choice, real talk Retaliate and risk a red card, or maintain composure and trust their team.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: Sound familiar?
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: It's the same in the boardroom, where a colleague misses an important deadline and makes you look bad.
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: You can either blow up and place the blame or step up and find the solution.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: This is split second and sometimes in the middle of competitive stress, it's super hard to take responsibility and, worse, if emotions creep in, responsibility can go out the window.
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: This is why we want to have a restorative practices approach and consciousness the window.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: This is why we want to have a restorative practices approach and consciousness so that, as we saw in Making Moves Monday, we're privileging relationship.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: That was the first star of the five R's of restorative practice.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: We want to always make sure we are going to guard the relationship with whomever we're involved with more than anything else.
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: And this today in Take Action Tuesday, we're going to take action by taking responsibility always.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: So real responsibility, it's choosing your response, even when you're not choosing the situation.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: I must say that again, real responsibility involves choosing your response even when You're not choosing the situation.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: You see, that's what makes great leaders.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: They don't just own their actions, they create an environment where everyone feels safe to do the same.
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: They understand that true responsibility isn't about being perfect.
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: It's about having the courage to own your game, learn from your mistakes and setbacks and encouraging and inspiring other people to do the same.
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: So when you choose your response and you're measured and you show self-control, you literally are giving other people permission to do the same and your decision-making would be so much better.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: You're not clouded, and your decision-making will be so much better.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: You're not clouded.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: It's almost a kind of weakness to just be so impulsive and reactive, and smart opponents will actually try to push you into an impulsive reaction.
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: So you want, on this Take Action Tuesday, to really be somebody who takes responsibility for how he or she is going to handle himself or herself.
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: Got it Perfect, so all right, here's the challenge.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: Your Take Action Tuesday challenge is this I want you to identify one situation where you've been focused on blaming something or someone instead of the solution.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's with a teammate, a colleague, a coach, somebody else.
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: Somebody's bothering you and I want you to ask yourself these questions.
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: One, how can I contribute to a solution in this problem?
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: Or two, what can I own in this situation that might make it a bit better?
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: Three, how can my response create a positive change?
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: How can I be a positive change agent here?
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: Just asking these questions literally will give you a different way of looking at the situation.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: Not just about pointing the finger at what's wrong, but asking yourself what can I do here to make a change?
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: That's all I'm asking you to do.
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: Ask yourself the questions and walk around with the questions.
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: You don't have to answer them right now, but just walk around with them.
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: Okay, so remember, I heard this quote.
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: I think it was from a soccer star, I can't remember her name right now, but the quote was something along the lines that leadership is taking care of others first.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: Leadership is taking care of others first.
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: When you take responsibility, you're not just improving yourself, you're elevating the entire team, and so you want to be that kind of leader, and everybody has leadership in them.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: So your action on Take Action Tuesday starts now.
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: Where are you going to take an action and commit to taking responsibility for something that's going on in your life?
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: Where are you going to make the change to be very responsible?
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: Where are you going to step up and take responsibility first and change the dynamics around you?
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: Okay then, this is Dr Sweet.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: Thank you for listening Tomorrow.
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: Tomorrow we will be facing Wednesday, and do you know what Wednesday is?
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: We call it Win it All Wednesday.
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: Tomorrow we will explore our next principle.
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: Wednesday is we call it Win it All Wednesday.
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: Tomorrow we will explore our next principle, the third R in the five R's of the restorative practice approach, and that third R is repair.
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: So until then, true champions don't just own their actions, they own their responses to every situation.
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: Be a champion today and own your own reactions.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: This is Dr Sweet.
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: For more, please follow me on TikTok, follow me on LinkedIn or follow me on Instagram.
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: I look forward to hearing your reactions.
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: Thank you.