Latest / She Rises with Ashy & Tijana / 123. Good Girl No More: Gave her husband a lap dance & posted it online.....the HATE that came with it

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123. Good Girl No More: Gave her husband a lap dance & posted it online.....the HATE that came with it · She Rises with Ashy & Tijana

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Speaker 1: Apoda Production. Welcome to the She Rises Podcast. I'm Ashy
0:13
Speaker 1: and I'm Tiana. This podcast is about female empowerment.
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Speaker 2: And encouraging you to be your biggest, boldest, and most
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Speaker 2: authentic version of yourself.
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Speaker 1: We help you shed the shame, grow to a new level.
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Speaker 1: We're gonna laugh, cry, and talk about the topics everyone
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Speaker 1: else is too afraid to talk about. Get ready for
0:29
Speaker 1: your next level of self. Hello everybody, Welcome back to
0:32
Speaker 1: she Rises. A beautiful Wednesday morning, afternoon, midday evening. Wherever
0:36
Speaker 1: you're watching this, We've got a pretty fun episode for
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Speaker 1: you today.
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Speaker 2: You absolute attention seeking saucy Minx. You did a lap
0:44
Speaker 2: dance and you posted on social media? Oh shoot me,
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Speaker 2: how dare you? How dare you trigger the people?
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Speaker 1: Honestly, this was such a big ordeal, And you know what,
0:55
Speaker 1: I was a little bit hesitant to post because I
0:57
Speaker 1: knew that people were going to be triggered by this.
0:58
Speaker 1: I knew it would bring pushback. I took it to you.
1:02
Speaker 1: I took it to Steve. I was like, what do
1:03
Speaker 1: you think about this caption? Yeah, posts and both you
1:05
Speaker 1: like post the damn video. Since I showed Steve, he
1:08
Speaker 1: was like, this is amazing like post it. So I
1:10
Speaker 1: did straight away then, and I'm so glad I did. Now.
1:12
Speaker 1: There's many reasons why I posted this. There's a lot
1:15
Speaker 1: of assumptions, and we're actually going to read out the
1:17
Speaker 1: pushback comments, and before we go into those, I'm not
1:21
Speaker 1: offended by them. They didn't touch me to the slightest.
1:24
Speaker 1: I feel completely neutral. If anything, I just had a
1:26
Speaker 1: lot of compassion for these comments coming through because I
1:29
Speaker 1: really understand how they're feeling. Yeah, because I used to
1:32
Speaker 1: feel like that, But I suppose in a nutshell, the
1:35
Speaker 1: last couple of years, I feel like I've been doing
1:37
Speaker 1: a lot of inner work and peeling back my layers
1:39
Speaker 1: and wanting to get to know who Ash is at
1:41
Speaker 1: her core, and trying to undo the old conditioning that
1:44
Speaker 1: I put on myself for societies contributed to or my
1:47
Speaker 1: upbringing and all that kind of stuff. As we all are.
1:50
Speaker 1: And I feel like I've been surrounding myself with people
1:52
Speaker 1: they're very open minded, and I'm very drawn to women
1:55
Speaker 1: who are very authentic and are very sexually embodied. Yeah,
1:59
Speaker 1: and when I say drawn to, yes, I'm drawn to
2:01
Speaker 1: but equally it's triggered, right, I find quite challenging and
2:05
Speaker 1: Megs He's been that for me our whole friendship. She's
2:08
Speaker 1: very sexually embodied. She's a very sexual essential person. She's
2:11
Speaker 1: very open, very fluid. She talks about it just like
2:14
Speaker 1: she talks about how she makes a sandwich, like it's
2:16
Speaker 1: just super casual and chill. And I kind of grew
2:19
Speaker 1: up and put myself in a box of being the
2:21
Speaker 1: good girl, not the slutty girl, not the dirty girl,
2:23
Speaker 1: not the girl that sleeps around. I've only sat with
2:25
Speaker 1: three men, and I wanted my husband to feel special
2:28
Speaker 1: and didn't want to be someone that everybody had access to.
2:30
Speaker 1: I had this story of what that needed to look like. Yeah,
2:33
Speaker 1: and now I realize it's obviously just all stories. I've
2:36
Speaker 1: been trying to peel those back, and I don't know,
2:38
Speaker 1: like the last what do you reckon? Like six months?
2:40
Speaker 1: Six months? I would say, yeah, the last six minute journey.
2:43
Speaker 1: I've just been shedding all the shame that I've put
2:45
Speaker 1: on myself. I've been exploring myself more. I think the
2:49
Speaker 1: last maybe year or two, i've like self pleasured more
2:52
Speaker 1: than I ever have been having beautiful experiences with myself,
2:55
Speaker 1: deepening my connection and relationship with Steve, we've been talking
2:59
Speaker 1: more about fantasies and just trying different things together because
3:02
Speaker 1: we've been together seventeen years, and I believe in my
3:04
Speaker 1: own experience so that it takes conscious effort to keep
3:07
Speaker 1: that spark alive and to keep that fire in your relationship,
3:10
Speaker 1: that passion, that pull, that magnetic like feel. I always
3:13
Speaker 1: want that in my relationship, and I don't think it's
3:15
Speaker 1: something that's always going to naturally be there, especially in
3:18
Speaker 1: seasons of parenthood and stress, growing a business, wearing all
3:22
Speaker 1: the different hats, it can be really tough sometimes, So
3:25
Speaker 1: something I've been very conscious of and so is Steve.
3:27
Speaker 1: And yeah, our intimate life, our relationship is better than ever.
3:31
Speaker 1: And one thing I've always wanted to do once again.
3:33
Speaker 1: Magazine thought this years ago. I actually baby sat Sunny
3:36
Speaker 1: when they went and did it, and I remember I
3:38
Speaker 1: remember when she went to did the class. I remember
3:40
Speaker 1: saying to her I would never do that. Steve would
3:43
Speaker 1: never do that, and she's like, hey, cool, can you
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Speaker 1: watch Sunny for me? Though I was like yeah, after
3:48
Speaker 1: you go, but I remember just like feeling, I don't know,
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Speaker 1: just feeling like, yeah, I would never do that. That
3:53
Speaker 1: just seems like a lot, but I love watching their routine.
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Speaker 1: It was cool or whatever, and just I've just been
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Speaker 1: shedding the shame. So one thing I've always wanted to
4:00
Speaker 1: do is to do a class with Steve. A dance class.
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Speaker 1: Now he is not a dancer, he's got no rhythm.
4:05
Speaker 1: I want to learn to dance. But these classes that
4:07
Speaker 1: our dance teacher runs, he was by Misha, is a
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Speaker 1: couple's class where the girl learns the dance and then
4:13
Speaker 1: the husband comes in and you perform it on them.
4:15
Speaker 1: And our girlfriend Amy did it maybe like a year
4:17
Speaker 1: or two ago, and ever since I saw her post hers,
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Speaker 1: I was like, I really want to do that. You've
4:21
Speaker 1: been talking about it for a while so long. And
4:23
Speaker 1: then I was messaging my dance teacher, Misha. I was like,
4:25
Speaker 1: please do one of these classes. Please do one of
4:27
Speaker 1: these classes. She's like, what dates do you want? And
4:28
Speaker 1: I sent us some dates and finally she booked it in.
4:31
Speaker 1: So I booked it in and it was the best
4:33
Speaker 1: thing ever. It was so much fun. So we learned
4:35
Speaker 1: the dance for forty five minutes on just a chair,
4:38
Speaker 1: and then all the husbands and partners came in and
4:39
Speaker 1: we performed it twice. For them fun in a room
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Speaker 1: full of everyone else. We're all in LAINGDERI like. Some
4:44
Speaker 1: girls were in full g strings and a bra I
4:46
Speaker 1: had like a body suit on. Some girls in stockings,
4:50
Speaker 1: some girls are in active, rare, whatever you're comfortable with.
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Speaker 1: And it was just so empowering. I'm a dancer. I
4:55
Speaker 1: did dancing my whole life. I love performing. I love
4:58
Speaker 1: being in that energy, the lights on, everyone's in this beautiful,
5:00
Speaker 1: like sensual fun vibe and it was so much fun.
5:04
Speaker 1: And Steve I loved it, absolutely loved it. I've danced
5:08
Speaker 1: for him at home before, but I have felt a
5:10
Speaker 1: little bit like I don't know in my head, like
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Speaker 1: what if I get the moods wrong or I couldn't
5:15
Speaker 1: slide around on the carpet, or space isn't right, Space
5:18
Speaker 1: wasn't right. The kids in the neck next door, the mood, Yeah,
5:21
Speaker 1: the mood so being there it was just so empowering
5:23
Speaker 1: and so beautiful and just yeah, connected us even more.
5:27
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh my gosh, I wish we
5:28
Speaker 1: could do this more often. And I've recorded it. Everyone
5:31
Speaker 1: records their dance for their own personal use. Yeah, A
5:35
Speaker 1: girl and I uploaded onto my stories, which felt edgy,
5:38
Speaker 1: but not as edgy as having on my page and
5:41
Speaker 1: the feedback I got. I tell you what, in my
5:44
Speaker 1: fifteen years of being online, I have never received so
5:47
Speaker 1: much positive feedback. It was wild, But a lot of
5:50
Speaker 1: it was curiosity. Oh my gosh, where did you do this?
5:54
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, were you nervous? What did your husband think?
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Speaker 1: Was he nervous? How do you have the confidence to
5:59
Speaker 1: do that? Where'd you get you out for it from?
6:01
Speaker 1: Was it hard to learn the dance? Did anyone laugh
6:03
Speaker 1: like I feel like I would have the confidence? Just
6:05
Speaker 1: so many questions around or so for the next week,
6:08
Speaker 1: I struggled keep up. That would have been over a
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Speaker 1: thousand DMS. It was insane, But I loved replying to everyone.
6:12
Speaker 1: I voice messaged so many women and just tried to
6:14
Speaker 1: give them the courage to go and do something like
6:17
Speaker 1: this because it's so beautiful. And then yeah, I posted
6:20
Speaker 1: it on my actual page, and that's where the pushback
6:22
Speaker 1: came through. And I was always waiting for it because
6:24
Speaker 1: I'm in this era of I'm almost wanting to invite
6:28
Speaker 1: the uncomfortable, and this discomfort of my own triggers in
6:31
Speaker 1: because when I get triggered, it's my invitation to heal it.
6:35
Speaker 1: So we've spoken about other episodes, but even like healthy
6:38
Speaker 1: jealousy within my relationship with Steve, when that arises, like
6:41
Speaker 1: I want to see what's there for me? Like why
6:43
Speaker 1: do I feel like that? What am I making? That? Mean?
6:46
Speaker 1: Is that my own stuff? Am I projecting onto him?
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Speaker 1: And I'd love to sit with that now and unpack it.
6:51
Speaker 1: So Yeah, when the comments came through, which we're going
6:53
Speaker 1: to read them out, it was just really interesting. And
6:56
Speaker 1: like I said at the start, all these comments came through,
6:59
Speaker 1: I had a lot of compassion because I was like, oh, fuck,
7:01
Speaker 1: this is how I used to feel. I really hope
7:04
Speaker 1: that whether it's in a month's time, six months time,
7:07
Speaker 1: or twelve months time, that women that made these comments
7:11
Speaker 1: are going to step into this era where they get
7:12
Speaker 1: to strip back their layers and peel the onion back
7:15
Speaker 1: and find out what's underneath it for them, Because if
7:17
Speaker 1: you're triggered or you're making these comments, there's a limiting
7:20
Speaker 1: story as to why you can't feel that, be that
7:23
Speaker 1: and do that, and all it does is hold you
7:25
Speaker 1: back from experiencing more pleasure and experiencing more fun and
7:30
Speaker 1: play and connection with yourself. Your body and your partner.
7:33
Speaker 1: So we're going to read out some of the comments
7:34
Speaker 1: and just like give our opinions. So just remember that
7:38
Speaker 1: your triggers are not your truth, they are your teachers.
7:41
Speaker 1: We've got written here too, which is really cool. Other
7:43
Speaker 1: women's freedom isn't your threat, it's your invitation. Yeah, how powerful?
7:47
Speaker 1: Is so beautiful?
7:48
Speaker 2: It's so true, such a beautiful opportunity for you to
7:51
Speaker 2: grow within yourself as well.
7:52
Speaker 1: It's like, how beautiful that.
7:53
Speaker 2: You can utilize the things that you see in everyday
7:56
Speaker 2: life and turn them into something that's productive for you
7:59
Speaker 2: so that you can grow as a woman exactly. A
8:01
Speaker 2: conversation that we've been having a lot lately is that
8:03
Speaker 2: a lot of women a limitted in their current lives
8:06
Speaker 2: because they're disconnected from their sexual energy.
8:08
Speaker 1: Yes, and that's a whole conversation in itself. So is
8:11
Speaker 1: your sexual energy is just like your driving force that
8:13
Speaker 1: makes you feel so alive, Like I can't tell you
8:15
Speaker 1: how much we're lit up, happy and light I feel.
8:18
Speaker 1: I said this in a post that I wrote to
8:21
Speaker 1: now that I don't judge myself for it, and I
8:23
Speaker 1: feel free to fully express I have zero judgment for
8:26
Speaker 1: any other woman and how they express themselves. I could
8:28
Speaker 1: see someone naked dancing rubbing period blood on their faces
8:32
Speaker 1: are facial and it's like, I'm mutual towards it, Yes,
8:35
Speaker 1: you do you? Whereas years ago I would have so
8:37
Speaker 1: much judgment on them because I'm judging myself. I wouldn't
8:39
Speaker 1: allow myself to do that, Like, oh my god, I
8:41
Speaker 1: would never. Yeah, it's so nice to feel free and
8:43
Speaker 1: just not have that judgment on anyone, including yourself. You know,
8:46
Speaker 1: it's one of the comments some things should be kept private.
8:52
Speaker 1: I agree for sure it's not for everyone. But my
8:55
Speaker 1: intention to post this video one because of the feedback
8:59
Speaker 1: I got to my DMS. I'm like, wow, this needs
9:01
Speaker 1: to be a conversation more. Yeah. Two, I want to
9:05
Speaker 1: trigger people because I know when IRIS triggered by Megsie
9:08
Speaker 1: or by anyone else online. Once again, that's the invitation
9:11
Speaker 1: to explore why you're triggered, whether it's now or in
9:14
Speaker 1: six months or in five years time. I hope they
9:16
Speaker 1: reflect back and go, oh, this is what actually was
9:18
Speaker 1: talking about. I want to be a leader in that
9:21
Speaker 1: and not just in this energy but anything. That's why
9:22
Speaker 1: we talk about so many things on this podcast. We're
9:25
Speaker 1: not here to just sugarcoat everything and pretend everything's rosy
9:28
Speaker 1: and dandy. We want you to be like, oh, I
9:30
Speaker 1: don't know about that for me, and just start to
9:32
Speaker 1: ask questions and get more curious. So you might think
9:36
Speaker 1: that a dance like this should be kept private, but
9:38
Speaker 1: there was a deeper intention for me posting it. And
9:40
Speaker 1: also just remember I'm in a class with eighty people.
9:42
Speaker 1: There's forty of us that learnt that dance, and then
9:45
Speaker 1: forty partners that came in. Wow, it's not private. It's
9:48
Speaker 1: not private. This isn't only fans. It's not porn. It's
9:52
Speaker 1: a dance. Literally, it's not that deep. I want to
9:58
Speaker 1: read that one.
9:59
Speaker 2: Yes, you're performing for social media. This isn't sacred anymore
10:03
Speaker 2: because two thousand people have s edit to men. So funny,
10:07
Speaker 2: they were a fair few shares, but who's to say
10:10
Speaker 2: that they were all shared to men like for the
10:12
Speaker 2: most part. And I know from myself, I'm always sharing
10:15
Speaker 2: stuff to you. When I share stuff about I'm like,
10:17
Speaker 2: oh my god, how cool is this?
10:18
Speaker 1: Oh my god? Look how good does she look on? Yeah?
10:21
Speaker 2: Good? The way that she dances, look at her out
10:22
Speaker 2: shows So yes, there's an element of course, there's going
10:26
Speaker 2: to be men on there. There's men on social media,
10:28
Speaker 2: but it's predominantly going to be more women. You know,
10:32
Speaker 2: what are your thoughts on that one?
10:33
Speaker 1: Well, there was tons of wives that said, I sent
10:35
Speaker 1: this to my husband, I want to do a class
10:36
Speaker 1: like this. Yeah, I love so. Yeah, I'm sure it
10:38
Speaker 1: was shared men, but like so, yeah, this is what
10:42
Speaker 1: I mean about getting curious, Like what does that mean?
10:44
Speaker 1: And no, it's it's not sacred. What I do in
10:46
Speaker 1: the bedroom with Steve is sacred. I'm not videoing any
10:48
Speaker 1: of that. You guys have no idea what we do
10:50
Speaker 1: in the bedroom. But a beautiful, empowering dance and seeing
10:54
Speaker 1: me connect my body and connect with my partner in
10:56
Speaker 1: that way. I can do that with a strong intention
10:58
Speaker 1: behind why. And I can also do that behind closed doors.
11:01
Speaker 1: I don't share everything. I share a lot, but there's
11:03
Speaker 1: a lot that I don't share.
11:04
Speaker 2: You know, it's interesting you're performing for social media, you're
11:07
Speaker 2: not actually just living your life and then sharharing snippets
11:11
Speaker 2: of your life. And it's this automatic when someone does
11:14
Speaker 2: something sexual, it's like I've got to look away. I've
11:16
Speaker 2: got to look away because it's dirty, it's wrong. It's
11:19
Speaker 2: to be private. We're not allowed to talk about this
11:21
Speaker 2: in public, you know. And that's something we've talked about
11:24
Speaker 2: a lot recently, is how this conversation isn't had this
11:28
Speaker 2: conversation around sex, this conversation around intimacy, around sensual energy,
11:33
Speaker 2: around women being embodied in their feminine sensual energy, and
11:37
Speaker 2: then like life force energy, it's so taboo that it
11:41
Speaker 2: triggers everything in everyone. Every little thing that somebody has
11:44
Speaker 2: in terms of their sexual energy, a little bit of shame,
11:47
Speaker 2: bad experience, you know, don't let themselves experience anything. Grew
11:51
Speaker 2: up with really strict parents who didn't have the sex conversation.
11:54
Speaker 2: All of those little things lead to this moment of
11:57
Speaker 2: like when you see it and somebody posting it on
11:59
Speaker 2: social media, immediately you're getting triggered by it because you
12:03
Speaker 2: are holding onto that shame around sex or around intimacy.
12:07
Speaker 1: A lot of these comments too, I'm like, I mean, personally,
12:10
Speaker 1: I enjoy watching women dance. I've been to a strip
12:13
Speaker 1: club with girlfriends. I've on movies. I enjoy it, even
12:16
Speaker 1: sex scenes on movies. I don't love porn, but like sex.
12:18
Speaker 1: These comments, I'm like, gosh, I hope you don't watch
12:20
Speaker 1: Netflix because it's actual, real sex scenes on there, legit.
12:23
Speaker 1: How did that feel for me? I personally really enjoy that. Yeah,
12:26
Speaker 1: I love watching people. I was at Burly Headland on
12:28
Speaker 1: Sunday and there's this beautiful couple in front of me
12:30
Speaker 1: just having a makeout session. I was like, that's beautiful, Like,
12:33
Speaker 1: I actually really enjoy it. So why does it always
12:36
Speaker 1: have to be so private and shamed and like only
12:38
Speaker 1: done in the dark room with no one watching, Like.
12:40
Speaker 2: It's in the eye of the beholder, Like the perspective
12:43
Speaker 2: and the way that you perceive that situation. Yeah, it's
12:45
Speaker 2: like you know, when you showed me that video, I
12:47
Speaker 2: was like, oh my god, I watched it ten times.
12:48
Speaker 2: That was a you looks so good and like, yeah
12:50
Speaker 2: for me, when I watch the video I watch you
12:52
Speaker 2: and Steve, I'm like, oh my god, the connection, the chemistry,
12:55
Speaker 2: the intimacy between you two when you are dancing, so
12:58
Speaker 2: Steve's locked in on you. No one else in the
13:01
Speaker 2: world mattered except for that moment, And I was like,
13:03
Speaker 2: what a beautiful thing to be able to you see
13:05
Speaker 2: and witness as an outsider, to go wout. How beautiful
13:08
Speaker 2: that is. And that's something that not a lot of
13:11
Speaker 2: people can say after seventeen years of being together.
13:12
Speaker 1: I think that's impressive. It's incredible. And I felt exactly
13:15
Speaker 1: the same so our dance teacher, Misha. Her partner had
13:19
Speaker 1: never been into the dance studio, and he ever, he's
13:22
Speaker 1: never never been in the dance studio. So he came
13:24
Speaker 1: in first and we all made a circle and she
13:26
Speaker 1: performed the dance where you're about to learn on him.
13:28
Speaker 1: Oh I love that. Oh my god, She's insane. It
13:31
Speaker 1: was so hot, so hot. I was like wow, and
13:35
Speaker 1: I just felt so inspired and empowered and same thing
13:39
Speaker 1: watching his eyes lock on, being like that is my
13:41
Speaker 1: fucking wife, Like oh just see. He was like, felt
13:44
Speaker 1: so lucky. I was just like, that's amazing. I was
13:46
Speaker 1: a man. I would hope my girl did that for me,
13:48
Speaker 1: Like mezzirized, Hey, yeah, why can that not be celebrated
13:52
Speaker 1: and seen more and be forward more and enjoyed more?
13:55
Speaker 2: Its perspective, right is when you do? I mean for us, Like, well,
13:58
Speaker 2: we're having this conversation. When I see a man look
14:01
Speaker 2: at his partner like that, I think that's so incredible.
14:03
Speaker 1: I'm like, how beautiful.
14:05
Speaker 2: They have a connection so deep that that's how mesmerized
14:08
Speaker 2: he is in that moment by her, and then for
14:10
Speaker 2: other people it's like trigger and gott to look away. No, oh,
14:12
Speaker 2: that's lutty, that's this, you know. There's so many judgments
14:16
Speaker 2: and their own projections around what that is. Yeah, you know,
14:18
Speaker 2: And this is the conversation around bringing in your triggers
14:22
Speaker 2: and being curious about them so that you can start
14:25
Speaker 2: to unpack them, because it's like, yes, it triggers you
14:28
Speaker 2: for a reason, Does it mean that you disagree with
14:31
Speaker 2: what's happening. No, it's likely just because there's judgment underneath
14:34
Speaker 2: it and you're scared of what's actually underneath that.
14:37
Speaker 1: And even if you would never upload it to social media,
14:40
Speaker 1: that's so fine. Yeah, be a teacher or police obviously
14:42
Speaker 1: not even allowed to show anything on social media. But
14:44
Speaker 1: it doesn't mean you have the right to say that
14:47
Speaker 1: it's wrong, yes, or judge someone else for doing it.
14:50
Speaker 1: I've shared my life for fifteen years. I talk on
14:52
Speaker 1: a podcast, I share a lot about my second live
14:54
Speaker 1: and everything. It's pretty normalized. Yeah, like a lot of
14:57
Speaker 1: my friends don't share any of their life on social media.
14:59
Speaker 1: That's cool too, But I just think the shaming and
15:02
Speaker 1: the projections. That's what we want to talk about today,
15:05
Speaker 1: like when these comments come through or when you feel them.
15:07
Speaker 1: I never projected mine onto Megsie or other women. I
15:10
Speaker 1: just felt them internally, and then I felt shame for
15:13
Speaker 1: feeling them. Yeah, so I was like, I don't want
15:14
Speaker 1: to feel that about her, but oh oh did I do?
15:17
Speaker 1: And I feel that about myself too, And I would
15:19
Speaker 1: just shove it under the rug and sweep it because
15:21
Speaker 1: it felt too uncomfortable. And I would just say, oh,
15:23
Speaker 1: it's just the way it is, or it's just wrong,
15:25
Speaker 1: or she shouldn't do that. But why, yeah said who
15:29
Speaker 1: said who? When you make those comments, it's cringe. It
15:31
Speaker 1: shouldn't be on social media. It's not sacred. Is that facts?
15:35
Speaker 1: It's not. No, that's your own made up story, right.
15:39
Speaker 1: Another comment that I want to talk about a lot
15:41
Speaker 1: of women message me about this too, was I'm too
15:43
Speaker 1: insecure for this, or I wish I had your confidence,
15:46
Speaker 1: or comments like if I had your body, I'd be
15:48
Speaker 1: doing that too. I was still nervous too. Even if
15:51
Speaker 1: you're insecure, quote unquote not confident, you do it anyway. Yeah,
15:55
Speaker 1: you have to start somewhere, I promise you. If you
15:58
Speaker 1: keep sitting back just saying I'm not confident for that.
16:00
Speaker 1: I don't have her body or never look as good
16:02
Speaker 1: as her. You're right, Yeah, that'll always be you. It'll
16:05
Speaker 1: always be your story and you always be sitting on
16:07
Speaker 1: the sideline. There was other girls in there that were
16:09
Speaker 1: way better dances than me, that were way more experience,
16:12
Speaker 1: that are way more confident. But it's about getting back
16:15
Speaker 1: to your body and just connecting to yourself and being
16:17
Speaker 1: there in the moment with your partner. And honestly, like
16:21
Speaker 1: I definitely loved watching the other girls dance, but when
16:23
Speaker 1: it was my turn, I was just so locked into
16:25
Speaker 1: the moves and like moving with my body and locked
16:27
Speaker 1: into Steve. That was just our experience. It was beautiful,
16:30
Speaker 1: but I think all of us have insecurities in our bodies.
16:34
Speaker 1: And also, you can choose outfits that feel good for you.
16:36
Speaker 1: Like Amy had a full geshow next to me, and
16:38
Speaker 1: I wasn't quite ready for that. I wanted like a
16:39
Speaker 1: bodysuit with a little bit more coverage. Yeah, you just
16:41
Speaker 1: wear what feels good for you.
16:43
Speaker 2: This is the whole purpose of this conversation is that
16:46
Speaker 2: it's not about anybody else.
16:48
Speaker 1: No, it is about you. Reconnecting with your sexual energy.
16:51
Speaker 2: Because when you are in that safe space and you
16:53
Speaker 2: can connect with yourself from a loving place, you allow
16:56
Speaker 2: yourself to really own all of that sexual energy. You
17:00
Speaker 2: allow yourself to own what feels good, yeah, what feels pleasurable,
17:04
Speaker 2: what you in moments like this that you want and
17:07
Speaker 2: desire to share with your partner that you're too scared
17:09
Speaker 2: to do. And for as long as you allow that
17:12
Speaker 2: story to kind of dictate your life, you will always
17:14
Speaker 2: feel like you need to stay behind the lines of
17:16
Speaker 2: what's right or what's good or what's acceptable in society.
17:20
Speaker 2: Pushing beyond that edge of what feels comfortable for you
17:24
Speaker 2: is what allows you to stop judging yourself and to
17:27
Speaker 2: stop judging others as well.
17:28
Speaker 1: I don't know about you, guys, but when I watch
17:30
Speaker 1: women dance, it's not about how lean they are or
17:34
Speaker 1: if they have a six pack. It's how they feel
17:36
Speaker 1: from the inside shines on the outside, right, Like if
17:39
Speaker 1: they're just moving away and they're so common, you will
17:41
Speaker 1: naturally be drawn to them. Compared to a girl that
17:44
Speaker 1: feels insecure and is like judging herself and like awkward.
17:46
Speaker 1: If she stuffs up, she's like, oh, you know, it's
17:49
Speaker 1: like in her head, in her head. When the woman's
17:51
Speaker 1: in her body and just like moving in that flowy,
17:53
Speaker 1: beautiful state, you're drawn to her. You're not worried about
17:56
Speaker 1: whether she has saalde or if she's a size fourteen
17:59
Speaker 1: or a size eight. It's not even a thought. No,
18:01
Speaker 1: So the girls that are saying, oh dude, if I
18:03
Speaker 1: had your body or I'm too insecure for this, like
18:05
Speaker 1: give rid of those stories because it's not what it's about.
18:07
Speaker 2: And everyone has that, like we said, everyone securities. When
18:11
Speaker 2: I first did my first heels class, I was so
18:14
Speaker 2: in my head. I was like all of my judgments
18:17
Speaker 2: that I have on myself came up in that room,
18:19
Speaker 2: in that classroom. Healing' so healing because after about three
18:22
Speaker 2: or four times, you're like, wow, I really understand what
18:25
Speaker 2: it feels like to drop into my body. With the
18:27
Speaker 2: very first session, I was like, oh my god, if
18:29
Speaker 2: people watch me, they're gonna care about how I move,
18:31
Speaker 2: what if I fuck up, what if I make a mistake.
18:33
Speaker 2: Like all of my own the things that go in
18:35
Speaker 2: my head every single day came up in that moment.
18:37
Speaker 2: But you're never going to be able to push through
18:39
Speaker 2: them until you continue doing something consistently exactly, because then
18:42
Speaker 2: what happens is you become confident at it with time
18:45
Speaker 2: and repetition. Like anything, never do it, never explore it,
18:48
Speaker 2: never open that up or feel like, oh nope, that's
18:51
Speaker 2: too hard, basket ye never going to grow in that area.
18:54
Speaker 2: And this is about pushing your edges, it is.
18:56
Speaker 1: And even in the dance class we went to one
18:58
Speaker 1: couple of months ago, I definitely felt embarrassed. But do
19:01
Speaker 1: you remember when she was like, how's everyone going? Yeah,
19:03
Speaker 1: I put my hand up. I was like terrible, Yeah,
19:05
Speaker 1: like I can't get it? Yes, And everyone kind of
19:07
Speaker 1: turned and had a little giggle, and I was like, okay, yeah, cool,
19:10
Speaker 1: this is actually hard. It was humbling. That was a
19:12
Speaker 1: humbling session. And in this lap dance there was I
19:15
Speaker 1: think three moves that I just couldn't get so I
19:18
Speaker 1: changed it. Yeah, So I just made it work for me.
19:19
Speaker 1: And that's the beautiful thing about dancing is it's like
19:22
Speaker 1: you're not there to be perfect, You're not there to
19:23
Speaker 1: look like your dance teacher or the girl next to you.
19:25
Speaker 1: There to like make your own and it's about a
19:26
Speaker 1: freedom of expression through your body. And I grew up
19:29
Speaker 1: dancing and a lot of you know that I didn't
19:31
Speaker 1: love my home life, but dancing for me was my outlet.
19:34
Speaker 1: It's where I found peace. It's where I felt like
19:36
Speaker 1: I could just escape what I was dealing with at home.
19:39
Speaker 1: I could just feel to the music. We connected to
19:41
Speaker 1: my body, be with myself. I felt strong, I felt empowered.
19:44
Speaker 1: It's just feels so good. And until you go and
19:46
Speaker 1: do a dance class like this, you just can't explain it.
19:49
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's also a really beautiful way for you to
19:51
Speaker 2: connect with your body and get out of your head
19:53
Speaker 2: because predominantly, like think about how busy and overstimulated we
19:56
Speaker 2: are all little, all of us, right, and you don't
19:57
Speaker 2: have time for pleasure, slowing down, being present, all those things.
20:01
Speaker 2: It's one of those activities that fully pulls you out
20:04
Speaker 2: of your head and in body.
20:05
Speaker 1: It does powerful a Now, the one that came through
20:08
Speaker 1: which got a lot of pushback was around my kids
20:11
Speaker 1: seeing this dance so your kids will love that when
20:14
Speaker 1: they're older, or like, how embarrassing for Taj. You know,
20:17
Speaker 1: your kids shouldn't see you opening your legs to their father.
20:20
Speaker 1: Lots of comments like that, And when I came home,
20:22
Speaker 1: Taj was still awake. Meggsie actually looked after the kids
20:25
Speaker 1: for us, and he asked to see the dance and
20:27
Speaker 1: I was hesitant at first, and I said to Megsie, like,
20:30
Speaker 1: what do you think because I just go to her
20:31
Speaker 1: for advice like that, and she's like, got sunny seeing
20:33
Speaker 1: me dance Moon times. Kids don't sexualize everything. Yeah, So
20:36
Speaker 1: I just showed him and Taj is like, it looks
20:38
Speaker 1: like you guys had a lot of fun. You look
20:40
Speaker 1: really happy, mummy. Oh he's nine. Yeah. I don't think
20:43
Speaker 1: Tyler saw it actually, but even so, like she loves dancing,
20:47
Speaker 1: she's not old enough to like sexualize that, and also
20:51
Speaker 1: when she is an appropriate age, Like I want my
20:54
Speaker 1: children to never feel like sex is shameful, right. I
20:59
Speaker 1: want to have a conversation with them that it is beautiful,
21:02
Speaker 1: it's pleasurable, it's the way we connect, it's a way
21:04
Speaker 1: we make, we all do it. I don't want it
21:07
Speaker 1: to be this like taboo thing that no one talks about.
21:10
Speaker 1: Look away, look away, don't watch this, And that's where
21:13
Speaker 1: the sexual shame starts. Is so much like that.
21:16
Speaker 2: Don't want to have the sex conversation or no think
21:19
Speaker 2: with Yeah, I don't know how to answer that question, Well, yeah,
21:21
Speaker 2: why does it have to be like that exactly? Why
21:23
Speaker 2: does it have to be that conversation? And then that
21:26
Speaker 2: only accumulates with time until they get older, and then
21:28
Speaker 2: you're like, Okay, this is too far gone. This is
21:30
Speaker 2: so uncomfortable to talk about. But it's just a reflection
21:33
Speaker 2: I believe, at least, and I don't have kids, so.
21:35
Speaker 1: You bang on, you know what I mean.
21:36
Speaker 2: It's a reflection of where you are at in your
21:38
Speaker 2: own sexuality is what you're going to pass down to
21:40
Speaker 2: your children.
21:41
Speaker 1: Yeah, of course, safety and sex, knowing your boundaries, knowing
21:45
Speaker 1: your body, that's all a conversation as well. But I
21:47
Speaker 1: never want it to be shameful or this dirty thing
21:50
Speaker 1: that they can't talk about. I hope they feel safe
21:52
Speaker 1: to come and ask me questions and ask Steve or
21:54
Speaker 1: go to their aunties and like just have conversations around
21:57
Speaker 1: what that looks like and what it means and help
22:00
Speaker 1: shape positive beliefs around sexuality.
22:03
Speaker 2: Closeness, connection being a positive relationship with sex and intimacy
22:07
Speaker 2: and connection. Yeah, it starts in the home. I want
22:10
Speaker 2: my kids to be like, oh, mom and dad are
22:11
Speaker 2: always all over each other. Yeah, they love each other
22:13
Speaker 2: so much. They can't keep their hands off each other. Yes,
22:15
Speaker 2: I had the opposite growing up, Like they never stopped
22:17
Speaker 2: yelling each other. They fucking hate each other. Why are
22:20
Speaker 2: they together?
22:21
Speaker 1: They literally yell at each other like they're the worst
22:23
Speaker 1: person on earth. Like it was just complete opposite. I
22:27
Speaker 1: hope Tarla finds a man that is so obsessed with
22:29
Speaker 1: her and treats her so nicely and just loves the
22:31
Speaker 1: shit out of her. And I hope Taj does that
22:33
Speaker 1: to his partner, you know. And there's even the conversation
22:36
Speaker 1: around sexuality too, like if Taj was gay or Tarla
22:41
Speaker 1: was gay too, that's all good. I don't want this
22:43
Speaker 1: ever being uncomfortable or naughty or bad or something to
22:46
Speaker 1: be shameful of. It's like, bring it all in, Yeah,
22:48
Speaker 1: how do you feel? Cool? Loves love, let's chat about it,
22:51
Speaker 1: you know. So I just think we need to be
22:53
Speaker 1: super mindful of these type of comments and projections because
22:56
Speaker 1: they have impact, and that's your own stuff that you
22:59
Speaker 1: need to unpack. And I know some people are gonna
23:01
Speaker 1: be rolling their eyes just being like, no, it's just wrong.
23:03
Speaker 1: Issu'd opposed that. Yeah, I get it because I used
23:06
Speaker 1: to think like that, but I really hope, I really
23:07
Speaker 1: hope if you're listening, you're here because you're open minded,
23:10
Speaker 1: and yeah, like I said, it's in a month, six months,
23:12
Speaker 1: or a year's time, you'd be like, oh, I can
23:14
Speaker 1: see why she did that. I'm really glad she did
23:16
Speaker 1: because it made me think, or it made me question,
23:17
Speaker 1: It made me open up a conversation with my partner,
23:20
Speaker 1: or made me put on some music and have a dance,
23:22
Speaker 1: or made me want to, you know, try and do
23:24
Speaker 1: something different, or.
23:25
Speaker 2: Create some freedom for yourself and allay yourself to live
23:27
Speaker 2: outside of the box that you live in. Yeah. I'm
23:30
Speaker 2: not saying that you do that, but for the most part,
23:32
Speaker 2: we all do it. I do it, or like my
23:34
Speaker 2: whole life, I put myself in a box, especially when
23:36
Speaker 2: it came to being sexual, especially because of the video.
23:39
Speaker 2: It's like, well, now that I was slut shamed for
23:41
Speaker 2: that experience, and because I did like sex and I
23:44
Speaker 2: was having sex with my intimate partner at the time
23:46
Speaker 2: of like, however many years it was like oh, wow,
23:49
Speaker 2: now you're not allowed to have that. Yeah, you know,
23:51
Speaker 2: and then I wull myself in a box. And so
23:53
Speaker 2: seeing videos like this was super triggering for me. In
23:55
Speaker 2: the beginning because I shut down my sexuality and I
23:58
Speaker 2: told myself I wasn't allowed to have that. And it
24:01
Speaker 2: wasn't until I started to open that back up again
24:02
Speaker 2: did I start to feel a sense of and within
24:05
Speaker 2: myself again. And it is the most freeing thing when
24:08
Speaker 2: you're not living by this invisible rule book that you've
24:11
Speaker 2: got for yourself of like how you should be based
24:14
Speaker 2: on what everyone thinks you should be.
24:16
Speaker 1: The feeling of being free to be who you are
24:19
Speaker 1: and loving yourself, sick through it and loving every moment
24:23
Speaker 1: of it. It's crazy, this one layer of sexual shame
24:26
Speaker 1: that I didn't even realize I had. Did I have
24:29
Speaker 1: sexual shame? I'm not sure just how I put myself
24:30
Speaker 1: into a box, but just shedding that has brought so
24:34
Speaker 1: much joy into every other area of my life, but
24:37
Speaker 1: mainly my intimate relationship after seventeen years, to be better
24:41
Speaker 1: than we ever have. That's wild to me, and it's
24:43
Speaker 1: also really exciting. Yeah. So I just like, that's the
24:46
Speaker 1: reason I share it because how I feel right now,
24:49
Speaker 1: how Steve and I are. I want other couples and
24:52
Speaker 1: other women to be able to feel this good and
24:54
Speaker 1: for every day to feel this alive and this free.
24:57
Speaker 1: And also the less we can judge ourselves, the less
24:59
Speaker 1: we're going to judge other people. That will make the
25:01
Speaker 1: world a better place. So there's so much good that's
25:03
Speaker 1: come from this video. Yeah. Another comment I want to
25:07
Speaker 1: talk about, which has been a really cool, big conversation
25:09
Speaker 1: for you and I is a lot of people just
25:11
Speaker 1: said like attention seeking. One was like, you're an attention
25:14
Speaker 1: seeking whole, damn straight. Yeah. Actually, we love this right
25:19
Speaker 1: attention all the time.
25:21
Speaker 2: People think that that's criticism and criticism like, oh my god,
25:24
Speaker 2: you're such an attention seeking I'm like, damn straight, I am. Yeah,
25:27
Speaker 2: And this is the conversation we've had to allow both
25:29
Speaker 2: of us to step into more of that. Like, the
25:32
Speaker 2: reason why people get attention in unproductive ways is because
25:36
Speaker 2: they shame it and they shame themselves for it being
25:39
Speaker 2: something that is wrong. Yeah, and we when we're together,
25:42
Speaker 2: damn straight, I want attention.
25:43
Speaker 1: Of course, I want attention. I want more of it.
25:45
Speaker 2: I need more of it all twenty four to seven,
25:47
Speaker 2: every single we love it. We love it and giving
25:50
Speaker 2: ourselves permission in our friendship to be able to explore
25:53
Speaker 2: all of that and be seen in that and loved
25:55
Speaker 2: in that it's like those comments don't even touch the signs.
25:59
Speaker 2: It's like, yeah, I can.
26:00
Speaker 1: Eventually right back I write, yeah I do.
26:02
Speaker 2: I love it, And the moment you own it, it's
26:04
Speaker 2: a dissolved I actually had a conversation with somebody recently
26:08
Speaker 2: about that, and he was saying, like I made a
26:11
Speaker 2: joke about him liking attention.
26:13
Speaker 1: He was like, well, you like attention and I was like, damn.
26:15
Speaker 2: Straight, yeah, I al And he just like went completely silent, yeah,
26:18
Speaker 2: because he was like surprised that I responded in that way. Yeah,
26:21
Speaker 2: but own it. You own every part of who you are.
26:24
Speaker 2: It no longer is this big scary thing that you
26:26
Speaker 2: need to fear judgment around.
26:28
Speaker 1: And it doesn't come out in an unhealthy way exactly
26:31
Speaker 1: Tran I joke about with Steve too. He's like, how
26:33
Speaker 1: much attention you need? I'm like ten times more giving,
26:35
Speaker 1: more and more more bad. It's never enough. It's like
26:38
Speaker 1: a golden retriever. That's what Steve like, our golden retriever Taco.
26:42
Speaker 1: It's like his cup. It's never enough, it's never full.
26:45
Speaker 1: Like you could pat him all day, he will still
26:47
Speaker 1: come up to you and put his pour up on
26:48
Speaker 1: you and just look at you with these puppy dog eyes.
26:50
Speaker 1: It looks so stuffed. It just wants more love. Yeah,
26:52
Speaker 1: it's like all about the attention and love, Like, yeah.
26:54
Speaker 2: You know, what's the more that we get at the
26:56
Speaker 2: threshold increases.
26:57
Speaker 1: It feels so good. Just validation but in a healthy,
27:00
Speaker 1: positive way, Like I love getting validation and I'm making impact. Yeah,
27:04
Speaker 1: I love you telling that I've changed your mind or
27:06
Speaker 1: changed your life, or that I've opened up a new perspective.
27:09
Speaker 1: That kind of attention I love.
27:10
Speaker 2: Yeah, like getting a response back that that was the
27:13
Speaker 2: reason the woman went and did that.
27:14
Speaker 1: With her husbandly so freaking cool.
27:16
Speaker 2: Or healed a layer of sexual shame for her epic
27:19
Speaker 2: by triggering that from this one post perfect incredible love
27:22
Speaker 2: it all for. It's what we're here for. This makes
27:26
Speaker 2: me uncomfortable to watch, Yes, a good one.
27:28
Speaker 1: Let's talk about that. This makes me uncomfortable to watch.
27:31
Speaker 1: I feel you for sure, Like I said, I used
27:33
Speaker 1: to feel uncomfortable watching this too. But like that's the question,
27:35
Speaker 1: why what about that makes you feel uncomfortable? Is it
27:38
Speaker 1: watching another woman with that many clothes on? Is it
27:40
Speaker 1: the way she moves? Is it because you've shamed your
27:44
Speaker 1: sexual energy? Is it because it's highlighting that maybe you
27:46
Speaker 1: don't have that connection with your partner, Like there's reasons
27:49
Speaker 1: like get curious, get out of journal? Why does this
27:51
Speaker 1: make feeluncomfortable? This makes you feel uncomfortable because I can
27:54
Speaker 1: see how she's asked. This makes you feel uncomfortable because
27:57
Speaker 1: she's body rolling with her legs. Bread. This makes you
27:59
Speaker 1: feel uncomfortable because I'm assuming Steve has a heart on. Yeah.
28:03
Speaker 1: This makes you feel uncomfortable because I've never seen anything
28:06
Speaker 1: like this. Yes, this makes you feel uncomfortable because actually
28:08
Speaker 1: feels like a best friend and I don't know, I
28:10
Speaker 1: shouldn't see this. Yeah, Like what about that makes you
28:14
Speaker 1: feel uncomfortable and peel are back? Yeah, there's a reason there,
28:17
Speaker 1: and there's like so many hidden gems within that, Yeah,
28:20
Speaker 1: that you then can explore and free yourself off.
28:23
Speaker 2: And especially the unpacking the judgments too, of like I
28:25
Speaker 2: feel uncomfortable because I would never do this.
28:28
Speaker 1: Yes, that is a good one.
28:30
Speaker 2: Like because if you would never do that, like there's
28:33
Speaker 2: something there under that. Okay, what about it is super triggering?
28:36
Speaker 2: Why would you never do that? What is the judgment
28:38
Speaker 2: that you associate that with?
28:40
Speaker 1: Okay?
28:41
Speaker 2: Cool, I would never do that because people would think
28:43
Speaker 2: I'm a slot. Yes, because I think this is derogatory.
28:46
Speaker 2: People will assume that I.
28:48
Speaker 1: Just want a tention, Like my coworkers won't like me,
28:50
Speaker 1: my family won't accept me, my son will judge me,
28:53
Speaker 1: like all those things. It's all fear based. Yeah, so
28:56
Speaker 1: then it's like this big shiny light that you are
28:58
Speaker 1: living in fear. When you're living in fear, you're a
29:01
Speaker 1: prisoner in your own mind. And that's what we're talking about,
29:03
Speaker 1: is like setting yourself free, your life will change.
29:06
Speaker 2: And yeah, and this is the conversation, Like when you
29:10
Speaker 2: understand what it is that your own judgments are of
29:13
Speaker 2: why you don't allow yourself to do it, you'll understand
29:16
Speaker 2: why you judge other people for it too, Because if
29:19
Speaker 2: the judgment is people will perceive me as a slut,
29:21
Speaker 2: people will perceive me as attention seeking, people will perceive
29:24
Speaker 2: me as dirty or naughty or whatever the story is,
29:28
Speaker 2: you're automatically projecting that onto other people who do that,
29:31
Speaker 2: which is why you don't allow yourself to do it,
29:33
Speaker 2: because it's actually your own internalized judgments on being sexually expressed.
29:37
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you know what's funny too, Those words just
29:40
Speaker 1: spark something for me, like dirty, naughty, slutty. Say people
29:44
Speaker 1: to call me that a year ago, I'll be like,
29:45
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, like, no, I'm not dirty, No, I'm
29:48
Speaker 1: not slutty. I've only been with three men, like no, no, no.
29:51
Speaker 1: Whereas now if someone calls me dirty, slutty and naughty,
29:53
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, damn straight, I am. You're like a
29:55
Speaker 1: muscle see me. I'm a good girl. That's a good girl.
29:58
Speaker 1: Damn straight, I am right. Stee's little naughty slutty girl.
30:02
Speaker 1: I'm like and I love it. Yeah, being in that energy,
30:04
Speaker 1: Like why why is that so wrong to feel naughty,
30:07
Speaker 1: to feel slutty? You know?
30:09
Speaker 2: And it's funny because we all do it. Every are
30:11
Speaker 2: doing it behind closed doors, but nobody talks about it publicly.
30:14
Speaker 2: And it's like, why do you have to be just
30:16
Speaker 2: one thing?
30:17
Speaker 1: This is what I like?
30:18
Speaker 2: Is this whole being multiple things? Yeah, you can be
30:22
Speaker 2: somebody who is kind, you can also be innocent, you
30:25
Speaker 2: can also be playful, you can be the funny one,
30:28
Speaker 2: but you can also be naughty. Yeah, and you can
30:30
Speaker 2: also be super sexual and you can be a saucy
30:33
Speaker 2: minx who likes reading smart books. There's so many ways
30:37
Speaker 2: that you can express yourself and ways to express yourself,
30:41
Speaker 2: that you are not just one thing, not one thing,
30:44
Speaker 2: and to limit yourself as one thing is to literally
30:47
Speaker 2: live alive.
30:48
Speaker 1: That is dull, dull, so dull, so boring. Yeah. I
30:52
Speaker 1: don't want to just be the good girl or just
30:54
Speaker 1: be the mum, or just be known as the hustler. Yeah,
30:56
Speaker 1: oh way, let me be known as naughty as well.
30:59
Speaker 2: It's like, you want to post your smoothie videos with Tyler,
31:01
Speaker 2: but you also want to be a spicy minx, you.
31:03
Speaker 1: Say, Betty Crocker, I'm like, oh my god. One day,
31:07
Speaker 1: I'm like, it's smoothie time, I'm playing au title and
31:09
Speaker 1: next but I'm posting up dance and I love all
31:12
Speaker 1: sides of myself. We love variety, we do. We love variety.
31:16
Speaker 1: If you don't follow me on Instagram, what are you doing?
31:20
Speaker 1: But I want to read out the caption that I put.
31:22
Speaker 1: And I also read another caption the other day that
31:24
Speaker 1: I just thought was a bit empowering. A couple's lop
31:28
Speaker 1: dance class. Say what, yep, we did that? It was
31:30
Speaker 1: so much fun. I already know what some people might
31:32
Speaker 1: be thinking, why would you post this? I could never
31:34
Speaker 1: that's too much. And I get it because I used
31:36
Speaker 1: to be that person. I used to judge. I used
31:38
Speaker 1: to cringe at things that made me feel uncomfortable, not
31:40
Speaker 1: out loud, but in my own mind, because deep down
31:43
Speaker 1: I was suppressing that part of me. For most of
31:45
Speaker 1: my life, I lived in a box. I built myself
31:47
Speaker 1: the good girl, the not too much girl, the fitness girl,
31:49
Speaker 1: the mum entrepreneur, the relatable girl, the one who had
31:52
Speaker 1: to stay polished, proper and quote unquote normal. But over
31:55
Speaker 1: the last few years, even more so in the past
31:57
Speaker 1: few months, I've been peeling back those layers, asking myself
32:00
Speaker 1: deeper questions. Well, why have I thought that? Where did
32:03
Speaker 1: that judgment come from? Is that the actual truth? Why
32:06
Speaker 1: do I feel uncomfortable when I'm triggered? What is this
32:09
Speaker 1: showing me within? Maybe there is another way. Maybe I
32:12
Speaker 1: do want that, or to be that or express in
32:14
Speaker 1: that way. I began a new era of me reclaiming
32:17
Speaker 1: my expression, my sensuality, my playful, cheeky, sexy side that's
32:21
Speaker 1: always been there, just hidden under fear, shame, and the
32:25
Speaker 1: pressure to be the example. And here's the wildest part.
32:28
Speaker 1: The less that I judge myself the less I judge
32:30
Speaker 1: anyone else, and how beautiful to free myself and others
32:33
Speaker 1: of that. I feel free in my body, safe and
32:36
Speaker 1: solid in my relationship, and grounded in who I am.
32:39
Speaker 1: And it's not just freeing, it's electrifying. I feel alive,
32:42
Speaker 1: I feel awake, I feel at peace, and I know
32:45
Speaker 1: this is just the beginning. I'm showing this not for
32:47
Speaker 1: attention or approval, but because once upon a time I
32:50
Speaker 1: saw a video like this and I felt so much.
32:52
Speaker 1: I felt jealousy, curiosity, shame, and I was intrigued. It
32:56
Speaker 1: stirred something inside me because a part of me wanted
32:58
Speaker 1: that kind of freedom, that kind of connection to my body,
33:01
Speaker 1: my power, my partner, and my truth. So if this
33:05
Speaker 1: something inside you, I want you to lean in, ask
33:07
Speaker 1: yourself why, and maybe just maybe give yourself permission to
33:10
Speaker 1: feel more, express more, and be more. Because we get
33:13
Speaker 1: to write our own rule book, and mine includes a
33:15
Speaker 1: lap dance, more deeper conversations, more sensuality, and helping other
33:19
Speaker 1: women break free from their own judgments. Oh every word,
33:23
Speaker 1: thank you. Even reading that back, I'm like, oh, it
33:25
Speaker 1: just feels so good. And then I posted another one
33:28
Speaker 1: the other day which is similar, just about how I said,
33:31
Speaker 1: Now I've unlocked this and freed myself, it's kind of
33:34
Speaker 1: overpoured into every other area of my life, and I
33:36
Speaker 1: just want us to have more conversations around feeling alive,
33:39
Speaker 1: Like every day you can feel alive when you're in
33:41
Speaker 1: this energy. Right, Yeah, So this is my next caption.
33:45
Speaker 1: There's a fire inside of you that's begging to come
33:47
Speaker 1: back to life, not just to cope or function, but
33:49
Speaker 1: to feel, to burn, to come alive. We've been told
33:52
Speaker 1: to prioritize being productive, polished, and put together, But what
33:56
Speaker 1: if the real magic is in being turned the fuck on,
33:59
Speaker 1: not just by someone else, but by your own life,
34:02
Speaker 1: by your morning routine, by your creativity, the way your
34:05
Speaker 1: body moves, your day to day living, the way you
34:07
Speaker 1: feel when the sun touches your skin, or you overflow
34:10
Speaker 1: with good energy to anybody and everyone you come in
34:12
Speaker 1: contact with. But how good it feels to say no
34:14
Speaker 1: to what drains you and yes to what lights you up.
34:17
Speaker 1: You deserve a life that feels like foreplay, anticipation, excitement, pleasure,
34:21
Speaker 1: and play. A life where you're using and desire for
34:24
Speaker 1: your dreams, your passions, your body, and your truth. Because
34:27
Speaker 1: when a woman is turned on. She's unapologetic, she's electric,
34:30
Speaker 1: she's magnet. She's dangerous in all the best ways. So
34:34
Speaker 1: start asking yourself what turns me on emotionally? What turns
34:37
Speaker 1: me on spiritually? What turns me on physically? What parts
34:40
Speaker 1: of me have I been dimming that are desperate to
34:42
Speaker 1: be seen, touched and explored? And why have I dimmed
34:46
Speaker 1: this part of myself for so long? You don't need permission,
34:49
Speaker 1: you don't need to be ready. You just need to
34:51
Speaker 1: be willing to say yes to your desires, to your pleasure,
34:54
Speaker 1: to your power, to a life that is fully yours
34:57
Speaker 1: that sometimes you stop and think, wow, is this my
34:59
Speaker 1: actual life? Because whoever is reading this, you weren't born
35:02
Speaker 1: to just survive. You're here to thrive. You were born
35:04
Speaker 1: to feel all and there's only one person who can
35:06
Speaker 1: peel back the layers, make the changes, and stop making
35:09
Speaker 1: yourself small and missing out on all of life's pleasures.
35:12
Speaker 1: Oh so cool. I love that, so cool, I love
35:14
Speaker 1: this arab here, It's so fun. Thanks for joining us.
35:17
Speaker 1: Feeling passionate, oh, feeling ferry, feeling excited. Yeah, I'm like
35:22
Speaker 1: my underwear went. I was gonna say, I am hornie
35:27
Speaker 1: gotta go anyway, moving on and bye.