Latest / Two Broke Chicks / How To Get Over A Mental Rut ft Alexis Fernandez

Transcript

How To Get Over A Mental Rut ft Alexis Fernandez · Two Broke Chicks

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: This podcast is recorded on gadigal Land Always was, always
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: will be Aboriginal Land. Hey chicks, I'm sal and I'm
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: out and this.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: Is two Broke Chicks to show that shares life lessons
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: and tips to help make you rich in life. And
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: today we are so lucky to be joined once again
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: by Alexis.
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: Fernandez literally literally for you, girls, by this time this
• 0:30
  Speaker 3: comes out, will have been back yeah organized, I know.
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: Does that also mean that potentially, by the time this
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: episode comes out, maybe the bez.
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: Maybe yeah, both children will be oh my gosh.
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, if anyone's missed it. Alexis is expected.
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: With children, not with child, but with children.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but twins, because Alexis doesn't half ask anything.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: But literally what my mom said, she was like, if
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: it's going to happen to anyone, it's you, because you
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: can never just do things normally in your family. No,
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: you're the first first hell yeah, and they're identical, so
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: I don't know the gender, but it's going to be
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: either two girls or two boys, but yeah, identical twins.
• 1:12
  Speaker 4: Very exciting.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: Thank you, and we've got you on today because we're
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: going to talk about how.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: To get over a mental rut. Yes, which I.
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: Think is relevant at any time of the year, but
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: you know, in the middle sort of like later part
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: of the year. I do think that's when people need
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: this advice. Yeah, but before we get into it, we
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: love to start with our life lesson of the week,
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: So would you like to kick us.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: Off life Lesson of the week? I've actually just moved homes,
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: so I think in a good way. Just get better
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: at managing your expectations in a good way. So it's
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: it's not to say I'm not going to be able
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: to do this, but sometimes it's really helpful for your
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: mental health to just push the gold post a little
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: bit further, because I think all of us, like especially
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: with the move and like pregnant million things. I was like,
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: by the end of the week, I'm settled, everything's unpacked,
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: everything's done. I'm not living in this chaos. I'm not.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: And it's two weeks in now and we're probably ninety
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: percent there. And the first few days I was just
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: letting it get to me because I was like, I
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: just want to be organized. I need to just focus
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: on my work, and I haven't done that for weeks.
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: And then I think just saying like what didn't I
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: add one more week to the timeline, stretch it out
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: less each day, but then you're more likely to actually
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: get it done because if you do, like, I'm the
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: coin of to do list, but sometimes that list is
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: way too long for the day. Yeah, and then instead
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: of feeling accomplished because you've ticked off half of it,
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: you actually feel like you haven't done anything because you're like, oh,
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: look how much I haven't done. So it's like, what
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: if I did less every day, but make it so achievable.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: By the end of like two weeks instead of one,
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: I actually feel like I did everything I wanted to do.
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: I feel really good, and then you're more optimistic about
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: what you can achieve moving forward. That would be the lesson.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a very good one because a lot of
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: the time those deadlines we set are literally just for
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: ourselves if it doesn't impact anybody else.
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: So yes, you can move it. You can move it.
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: The reminder of free will is wild shit. They can
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: for like such a failure like I said this, Yeah, no,
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: it was an arbitrary we made it up. Yeah, exactly.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: This is all pretend my life. Lesson of the week
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: is to go on a weekend away.
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: So obviously, I know, we just I just got back
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: from six weeks away long but at the time of recording,
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: I just went to the Hunter Valley with my partner
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: and we went to the Hunter Valley Resort and farm
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: and literally took two hours to get there, like so
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: so doable, so easy, and it was truly just like
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: the nicest weekend ever. We went horse riding, we went
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: and did like the most beautiful like wine tour where
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: we actually went to like a distillery as well and
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: tried like different flavors of like vodka and gin and stuff,
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: and just we also did archery. Like it was just
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: so much fun to get out of Sydney and just
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: do like really fun little nerdy activities that I like
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: literally lived my dream like went horse, writing, archery, drinking wine.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: Ye, I was like, am I in a fantasy book? Yes, yes,
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: yes I am. Yeah, that's the whole I was living
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: my fantasy.
• 4:18
  Speaker 2: I love that.
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah. So that's my life lesson slash obsession go away
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: for a weekend.
• 4:25
  Speaker 4: Yeah it's a good one.
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: My life lesson of the week is I saw an
• 4:29
  Speaker 2: article from The Cut and apparently our attention spans have
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: decreased by sixty eight.
• 4:35
  Speaker 4: Percent in the last twenty years.
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I wouldn't not shocked. That's a lot.
• 4:41
  Speaker 4: That's a lot of decades.
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: Like, so what did it start at and what did
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: it what's it ended at? Okay, So twenty years ago,
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: the average amount of time an adult could focus on
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: a screen without interruption was one hundred and fifty seconds. Okay,
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: so that's like a little bit over too, two and
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: a half minutes. Yeah, yeah, And then in twenty twelve
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: it had dropped down to seventy five seconds, and then
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: between twenty fifteen and twenty twenty one that has dropped
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: down to forty seven seconds.
• 5:15
  Speaker 4: Well yeah, and.
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: The most recent stat is from twenty twenty one. And
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: I can only imagine how much just dropped further because
• 5:24
  Speaker 2: our use of apps like TikTok has only increased.
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: Well, TikTok's five years.
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: TikTok really kind of had its boom in twenty twenty.
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: So TikTok had only been around for one year in
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: twenty twenty one. So given that we've now had five years,
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: I wonder when they're going to do the next report.
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: Okay, I know we need to know. I don't want
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: to know. I don't want to know. That's right, it's
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: conditioning it. It can recondition yourself to yeah, focus exactly.
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: I think it will bounce back because I think we
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: are seeing the rise of long form content, especially with YouTube.
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: But I thought it was interesting to bring to today's
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: episode given the topic, because I know that we will
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: be covering some of these things and how to quieten
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: our brains exactly. Yeah, little seguey, if you will love it,
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: just jump into the episode. All right, Okay, let's talk
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: signs of a mental rut first, because I love this term,
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: but it's very open.
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, right, what is a mental rut? So it comes
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: in many ways, obviously depending on the individual, but basically
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: it's this feeling of kind of total stagnation. You're still
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: like doing the things that you have to do, Like
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: you're going through life, doing what you need to be doing,
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: You're going to work, you're doing whatever, but you're feeling
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: like I'm not making any progress. I'm not feeling excited
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: about things. I'm not feeling motivated about goals that I
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: was actually really motivated maybe at the start of the
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: year or at the start of the you know, whenever.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: So you feel like it's not like a really sad feeling,
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: but it's kind of like you feel like there's a
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: weight on you. Yeah, and you just don't feel light
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: and excited. When you wake up in the morning, it's
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: like here we go. Oh again, It's that kind of feeling.
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: You wake up and you're like, oh, dragging yourself exactly.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: So everything feels a little bit more mundane.
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: Because I want to kind of differentiate between a mental
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: right versus depression.
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: Yes, exactly. So depression is like definitely more sad thoughts.
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: Depression is also comes with something called anadonia, which is like,
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: you know, just absolutely no interest in doing anything new
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: and exciting, and whereas with the mental rut, you just
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: kind of feel a little bit stuck. You feel like,
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: I know I can feel good, but it's just not
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: that accessible to you right now. I know, I can
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: feel excited about this thing. You know, you think you
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: still have ideas to do things. I am going to
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: start that thing, but then you get home and you
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: end up sitting on the catch for hours and you're
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: not actioning these things. You're more just generally a little
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: bit more fatigued as well, Like you just find that
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: that energy just doesn't feel there. Not always, but most
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: people feel this in winter. But it's kind of like
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: you just fall into this pattern where you're like, I
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: need something to shake me up, to pull me out
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: of it. That's why a lot of people go on
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: holidays because they're like, pull me out of this thing,
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: shake me out of this thing, because I need to
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: like change what I'm doing because it's not working for
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: me right now. Whereas depression is a lot, it's a lot,
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: it comes with much heavier thoughts. You know, it's more
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: about your emotions and how you're processing your emotions and
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: things like that.
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: What are some common signs that you're experiencing a mental
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: right in your twenties, thirties and beyond.
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: Another good thing to know about a mental rut is
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: to identify the contrast. So if you're someone that's listening
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: to this saying, but I've always felt that way my
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: entire life, then maybe there's something deeper going on. If
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: you're someone that's never gotten excited about things or never
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: been able to be motivated and setting gold, the difference
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: with the rut is where you have that contrast where
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: you're like, no, like I can set goals. I can
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: get excited about things I can't start on, you know,
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: whether it's going to I'm going to go to ho
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: yoga three times a week and I'm doing it and
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: I'm feeling really good, and then I dropped, you know,
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: I dropped the ball and I'm not doing that. I'm
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: not working on this little business or my podcast or
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: the book that I want to write, all these things.
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: So I think it's really identifying where the shift has
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: happened and why has that shift happened, And it ultimately
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: comes down to overwhelm. That's why we get into a
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: bit of a rut. It's kind of like what we're
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: talking about the start of the episode, like making that
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: to do this a bit too big, Yeah, putting too
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: much on your plate, and then on top of that,
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: leaning into all these like massive distractors in our life
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: that are constantly pulling our attention, like you're saying, like things,
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: whether it's big things or little things, and then we
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: end up thinking, right, so I'm spread so thin that
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: now I'm just going to bring it back to do
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: the bare minimum that I have to do. And when
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: we do the bare minimum, it always we think we're
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: doing the important things, but we're just doing kind of
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: like what we deem to be the urgent, necessary things,
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: but they're not necessarily important. Like obviously, yes, work, you've
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: got to pay your rent, you know, all of these things.
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: But we sometimes will prioritize quote unquote urgent things. I've
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: got to get to all my emails. I've got to
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: reply to all these people, I've got to all this stuff.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: But then what's actually important is what's going to give
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: me happiness, consistent happiness, you know, what's going to be
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: fulfilling consistently, And that's the first thing to go. That's
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: the thing that we deem as a luxury. So it's
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: the first thing to go. It's you know, working on
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: the goals. It's giving myself that time to meditate, it's
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: going for that hot goal walk. It's all these things
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: that actually are crucial, but we're like, oh, it's a luxury.
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: So then that's where you see the contrast. You know,
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: a few months later, you've been overwhelmed, you've gotten rid
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: of all these quote unquote luxuries, and then you're in
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: this rut where you're like, I'm not as excited anymore.
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: I don't wake up excited.
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: I wake up like it's like, yeah, it's another dollar
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: of passion.
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: It is, it is, it is, And the knowledge that
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: it can be there. Yeah, the knowledge it's like, I know,
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: I can feel this way. And so that's the difference
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: with the rut. So for those of you listening saying
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: I've never felt that way, then I'd look a little
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: bit deeper. That's probably something more like anadonio depressive symptoms maybe,
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: Whereas the difference with being in a rut has to
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: do with, you know, it's definitely something that you're capable
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: of having this, you know, feeling great, feeling energized, feeling
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: like you're sleeping well, you're waking well, versus I'm now
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: in this rut. Yeah, I think it's interesting.
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: And I've heard you use the phrase functional freeze before. Yes,
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: So is this what you're describing, because I think a
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: lot of people would look at what they do day
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: to day, week to week and be like, I'm a
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: very productive person.
• 11:26
  Speaker 4: I have a lot on my plate. I'm not in
• 11:28
  Speaker 4: a rut. I'm just busy. But we're talking about passion here,
• 11:33
  Speaker 4: not just to do exactly.
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: So can you talk us through what is functional free totally.
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: So functional freeze is kind of it's different to you know,
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: when we talk about your flight or fight or freeze response,
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: that kind of freeze is extremely not functional. It's like
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: it's kind of a fear response or a trauma response,
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: and it's like, I can't do anything. I can't do anything.
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: A functional freeze is where we are so overwhelmed, but
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: there is still the ability to function. It's kind of
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: when people talk about, like the analogy I like to
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: use as a functioning alcoholic, Right, so, an alcoholic who
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: is functioning still goes to work, they still present well,
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: they shower, they smell like, they look put together. But
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: under the surface, just if you scrape on the surface,
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: they are an alcoholic and they can't live their normal
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: life without depending on this substance. So with a functional phraeze,
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: it's kind of we are so overwhelmed that we're not
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: processing things properly. We're not as focused, we're not as engaged,
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: but we're still able to work to do all the
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: necessary things. But the other difference with the functional freeze
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: is we will only take action when we have to.
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: So it's the kind of I'm waking up in the
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: morning but I'm going to stay in bed until the
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: latest point possible, Like I will be late if I
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: don't get up at this time. That's functional phrase. It's
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: kind of like, Okay, now I'm finally home, and I'll
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: just collapse until i have to eat. Now, I'll get
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: up and go and I'll eat something, but I'll do
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: the bed minimum.
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: So how do we defrost the functional phrase?
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: Slay loved that.
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: There's a few things you can do. Actually, there's a
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: there's a bunch of things we can do. The first
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: one is to pay attention to well, look, you want
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: to tackle it from the physical and also from the emotional.
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: So physically you have to look at it from like
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: your brain health perspective, like what does your sleep actually
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: look like? What does your downtime actually look like? What
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: does you like are you hydrating your brain? Like really
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: basic things. Like one thing that I've started like pushing
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: to my audience a lot, is like, are you actually
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: hydrating your brain when you wake up in the morning.
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: It's so basic and it will give you so much energy,
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: so much focus. It will make you feel better. And
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: it's just instead of not only drinking water will wake
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: up because we'll reach for coffee, which love so much,
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: love our coffee, but water first. Put electrolytes in there,
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: Put some potassium, put some vagnesium in there. It's a
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: game change because when we're asleep, the brain is working
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: so much. It's not resting. It's kind of it's doing
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: the repair, it's doing the recovery. It's flushing at all
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: this cerebral spinal fluid like four times over when you're sleeping,
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: so it's really active, just in a different way. So
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: I would lean towards more like you know those dissolvable
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: tablets and things like that that you can just put
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: in your water. You know, you buy them from any
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: pharmacy and they taste like berries or orange or whatever.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: But it's just make sure it's got potassium, magnesium, a
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: bit of sodium, and they're kind of the main things
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: that help neurotransmitters kind of like yeah, like communicate and
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: you know, action potentials within the brain and things like that.
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: So something so simple, it's like this is a very cheap,
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: very accessible thing to like, that's how to start my
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: Morning's electrolyzed. So now I'm feeling attle bit more alert,
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: I'm feeling awake. A huge problem is we're tired. So
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: that's one thing. Another thing is look at how you
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: are resting, because when we you know, if we go
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: home in the afternoon and we doom scroll, we're like, oh,
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: but I'm resting, I'm tired, I'm resting. But that's you're
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: physically resting, but you're not emotionally resting, you know, So
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: it's very I'm still draining, I'm still I'm staring, my
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: my visual systems working in overdrive. My emotion's going up, down, updown.
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: I'm riding the wave with all these videos that I'm watching,
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: I'm reading the comments. We're not rested after doing that.
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: So yes, scroll, but have you know I'm going to
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: scroll if I'm standing up, but then the moment I
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: sit down, it's when I grab a book. So that way,
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: it's like little things like that, Oh my god, I
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: would never scroll.
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: Exactly because it's actually active participation.
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: That's right, that's right. You don't really want that.
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: It's kind of like you get like if it addicted
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: to the fact that it turns your brain off, but
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: it's not really exactly exactly.
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: And interestingly, there was this study that was done on
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: the use of social media and how it impacts our
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: memory and our attention the following day. So the more
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: you use social media the day prior, the more it's
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: going to impact negatively impact your memory, your attention. But interestingly,
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: if you if it's passive consumption, that's where it really
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: negatively impacts. So if it's just I'm sitting here scroll,
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: but if it's active, it's way less likely to negatively impact.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: So if I'm replying to people, if I'm reading a
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: message that someone sent me, if I'm actively posting something,
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: that is more you're more engaged, and that's less likely
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: to negatively impact these factors the following day. So it's
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: kind of like, still use social media, but think, how
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: can I be a bit smarter about how I'm using
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: social media. Maybe I'll on this scroll for ten minutes
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: and the rest has to be replying to Dan's you know,
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: but la la lah, and then I'm off and then
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: maybe three hours later I can revisit, have another little scroll,
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: things like that, and even find like pockets that work
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: for you. So it's like for me, I think what
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: really helps with that is I won't get onto social
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: media for the first minimum one hour, but maybe two
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: hours of the day, So already you're in the zone.
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: You're feeling good by the time I pick up my phone,
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: I don't want to sit and scroll forever. I'm like,
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: quick little, but I'm already in a great mood, so
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: I don't need to on that to make me feel
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: like I'm in a good mood. And then, yeah, are
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: there any other loops that keep us in a rut? So, like,
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: obviously doom scrolling is one of them. Yes, yes, Another
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: thing that definitely keeps us in a rut is like
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: not having a good kind of wind down when we
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: fall asleep, when we like go to bed, things like that.
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: It's really and it's not like you don't have to
• 17:20
  Speaker 1: have a crazy routine, Like routines are really great for
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: some people, not as great for other people. But it's
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: still even if you don't have a routine or a
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: set bedtime, it's still, how am I winding down at
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: the end of the day? How am I? Actually? You know,
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: allowing myself to rest. Rest is everything. If you have
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: sound sleep and like, you know, hydrated brain, that's you're
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: seventy percent there. It sounds so basic, but it's like
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: if I wake up with energy, my mood is completely
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: different versus if I wake up tired. If I wake
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: up tired, I have a debt. I have a sleep debt.
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: I have an energy debt, and I'm always trying to
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: replenish that. But if I wake up with a surplus
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: of energy, you know, then also how like if you
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: look at it from like a neurochemical neurotransmitter perspective, I'm
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: well rested, my brain's had an adequate sleep, amount of
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: hours I've wound down. I'm not stimulating, stimulating and then
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: trying to sleep, but I'm still wired. Then think about it,
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: I'm Karma, and because I'm calmer, my thoughts are more
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: proactive and not reactive. Then I can start thinking about
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: what I want in my life. Then I can actually
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: start getting excited about this afternoon. Instead of thinking can't
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: wait to get home to you think, oh, what could
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: I do this afternoon? What could I something different? Maybe
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: I want to go get some ingredients and cook something
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: I haven't cooked in a while. Maybe you start having
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: all these you start getting excited about some tiny things,
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: go onto some archery.
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we also have spoken a lot about overstimulation, and
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: you have mentioned that as being like a key part
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: of a mental right.
• 18:46
  Speaker 4: So what is the scientific link between having a cluttered.
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: Space, whether that's physical or digital, and feeling like you're
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: in a mental.
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: Rat So when you're in like yours, when you're surround
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: are a shambles, clutter including your email inbox and physical
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: clutter and all of that, it is taking up your attention,
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: whether you realize it or whether you don't. Whether you're
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: someone that's like, oh my god, I'm aware and you're
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: naming it and you're constantly talking about it, versus someone
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: who's it's always a shambles. Their life is a shit show.
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: There's shit everywhere, and they just never really talk about it.
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: It always grabs your attention, consciously or unconsciously. So that
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: is using up your attentional kind of you know, resources
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: for the day. So if I've got laundry piled up
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: on the couch and I've got you know, I haven't
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: I haven't swept the floors, and I can see there's
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: this and the dishes in the sink, and I haven't
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: made my bed and my bathroom, I've left everything open
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: and there's products everywhere, and that then plays on your mind.
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: I come home and the first thing I see is
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: clutter disorder. Clutter disorder, and so it's already in the
• 19:55
  Speaker 1: back of my so that already starts to accumulate. That
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: adds to your overwhelm. A really neat and tidy space,
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: you know, streamlined space, less is more, get rid of
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: things I'm not using. Sometimes, especially you guys, would probably
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: get sent product all the time, and then you end
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: up accumulating so much product and then you think, I'm
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: better off giving this away or getting rid of this
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: that I don't use. So I can look at that
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: space and it's just exactly what I needed nothing more,
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: you know. And it's not about not having luxuries. Have
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: the luxuries, but are they serving you a purpose? You know?
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: You know, if my bed is made, not only am
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: I having that mini meditation when I'm making the bed
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: of just like I'm not being stimulated, I'm just you know,
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: you're just setting yourself up for the day. You're setting
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: yourself into this rhythm, this pattern. But not only that
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: you get home and everything's in order, everything's neat, so
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: you're not your eyes and your mind isn't resting on
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: oh disordered. It's your karma, your nervous systems a lot calmer.
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: Everything just feels a lot better. So I always say,
• 20:49
  Speaker 1: if you're in a rut, this is a perfect opportunity
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: to look at your space and declutter, declutter your wardrobe,
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: and don't don't pull everything out at the same time.
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: And then you get sit on the floor, it becomes
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: a five day or you get tired at like three
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: o'clock and then you look around and you made the
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: biggest mass of the biggest this, and then you're even
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: sadder than when you began. It's kind of you want
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: to target like, you know, maybe one bunch of shelves
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: at time or a drawer at a time, but think
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: of like this is my project for the week. You know,
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: I'm going to get home and just ten minute timer,
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: ten minute timer, and I'm just going to go through
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: one section off the wardrobe. Ten minutes has gone up.
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: That's it. I'm walking away, you know. But I feel accomplished.
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: I've done something little. I've done something to like declutter
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: my life, and so I feel emotional, like emotionally lighter
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: with decluttering.
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: Oftentimes we look at it and I do believe we
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: know we need to do it, Like we look around,
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: especially from my experience when I am overwhelmed, if I'm sad,
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: if I'm feeling rut vibes, if you will MySpace immediately
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: will reflect that.
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: Like if I've had a bad.
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: Week from Monday to Friday, on Saturday, I look around
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: and I'm like, fuck.
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: My fucking life. Yeah, Like my apartment will be a bomb, right.
• 22:00
  Speaker 4: The apartment looks like the brain.
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: The apartment reflects how you're feeling.
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: A lot of the times, it's like, I know I
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: need to do it, but because I'm feeling overwhelmed, because
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: i feel like I'm gonna rute, starting that thing is
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: often really hard, and I think that's one of the
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: things that then you end.
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: Up beating yourself up for.
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: So what are your tips or how do you kind
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: of start that project when you feel like you're already
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: at your wits end, at the end of your rope
• 22:25
  Speaker 2: and you're like, oh my god.
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: And now I have to clean my whole space. Definitely,
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: because what we tell ourselves when I feel better, I'll
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: do this, And we've told ourselves this with everything in
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: our life, whether it be starting something new, whether it
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: be cleaning up our place, whether it be actually cooking
• 22:42
  Speaker 1: a meal instead of whatever. We always say, when I
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: feel better, I will be able to do this, But
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: we have lied to ourselves. It's the other way around.
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: When I do this, I will feel better.
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: It's you have to always every day remind yourself. Train
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: the body to train the mind. It's not the other
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: way around. It's a lot easier to discipline the physical
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: than it is to discipline the mind. So start with
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: the physical and the mind will follow. It always does.
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: So if you're in that position and your space is
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: reflecting your emotions, then I would start again. Manage your expectations.
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: Don't do everything in one day because we're already overwhelmed
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: this procrastination thing. If the task seems insurmountable, we're never
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: going to get to it. So make it a huge
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: I love time blocking. I will set a timer. I'll
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: put a great playlist on. Music is everything for your
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: moved because when you're talking about setting a playlist, be
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: very intentional with what's on that playlist. Don't then set
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: something that's going to really trigger a memory, that's going
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: to like that is it so so defense the purpose?
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: Like it's the kind of shit that you you physically
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: could not cry to even if you tried. It's that
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: kind of music like alimente are, like you cannot cry
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: to certain songs like people whatever. So put that playlist
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: on and then just do your half hour of power. Yeah,
• 23:55
  Speaker 1: thirty minutes and think, okay, thirty minutes. I'm just going
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: to work on decluttering the space a bit. I don't
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: have to even really like dig too far under the surface,
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: but just a bit of organizing. What can I do?
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: Before you know it, after about five minutes, you are
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: in the zone, and you are also racing against the clock,
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: you know, like if I've got a timer, I'm racing
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: against the clock, and I make a game out of it,
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: and it's a challenge. I'm not going to pick up
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: my phone and get distracted. It's only thirty minutes. Make
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: it twenty minutes, you know. And so then you think
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: I'm training my physical to train my mind. By the
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: end of the twenty minutes, most people will want to
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: go for another twenty ye Oh, but I've nearly finished
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: the thing. Most people be already inspired. You've got the momentum.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: And if you don't, you finish the twenty minutes, the
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: thirty minutes, and you think I just did that I
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: can do that tomorrow, it's not that hard. And then
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: you do it the next day, the next day, seven days,
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: thirty minutes to day. That's you know, you'll be amazed
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: what you can get done in your home with your
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: physical space. But also you'll already notice how it started
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: to influence your emotional space. You know, you'll already be like,
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: I'm actually looking forward to my thirty minutes this afternoon,
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: looking forward to that place task get like you feel
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: the same satisfaction, And it's kind of like this discomfort
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: pleasure kind of thing. You know, if we anything that
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: gives you pleasure immediately is likely always going to give
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: you a level of discomfort after anya. So it's the
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: little task that we get done. It's the you know,
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: it's the delayed gratification. You'll always feel good after instant gratification.
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: You don't feel good after. So that's how I always
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: look at this, Like what can I do If I'm
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: about to make myself a coffee, I'll be like, I'll
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: unstack one draw of the dishwasher because I love coffee
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: so much. So I'm like delayed gratification. Yes, the carrot, Yes,
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: I love that. Yeah, that's really good.
• 25:34
  Speaker 2: And you mentioned before as well, how when you make
• 25:37
  Speaker 2: your bed that can be a moment of you're not
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: being stimulated.
• 25:41
  Speaker 4: It's almost like meditation.
• 25:42
  Speaker 2: Yes, so what are the benefits of silence and how
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: can we reduce stimulation in our everyday routine?
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: And I'm also man like.
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: Not like I'll put your phone down, because we know that,
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: but what do we do when we put our phone
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: down to then not be stimulated? Because I think that's
• 25:59
  Speaker 2: the thing. People like, what am I going to do
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: to stare at a wall? So so used to just always.
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, totally, totally. So there's there's the little things like
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: make the bed. A really good one is to go
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: for a very short start. And the reason I say
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: short is because people like, I'm not doing a one
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: hour walk, So start short, like a fifteen minutes fresh
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: air with no music even nothing, just walk in silence
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: like none of us ever do that. So just go
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: for a walking times you'd be amazed at how the
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: first time it might be like, oh my god, that
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: never ended, but then you start to feel like wow,
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: the moment I walked back home though I had a
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: lot more clarity, I was a lot calmer. The beauty
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: of this is that you're Ultimately it's two things. One,
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: you start to regulate your nervous system. You're calming down,
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: you're probably breathing a bit deeper. You start you're more
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: aware of your surroundings. And another thing is you start
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: paying attention to this default mode network, which is kind
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: of what goes on when we're not actively focused on
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: a task or when we're not distracted, and that's kind
• 26:55
  Speaker 1: of your stream of thoughts. And most people will avoid
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: ever sitting in their network and listening to their thoughts
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: is because there's too much. And I wish I could
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: quote who said this because it was so great and
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: I heard it on an interview, but I can't remember
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: who said it. But it's not from me, it's from
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: someone else. But he talks about sitting with your thoughts.
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: And initially, for the first time, it's kind of like
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: when you open an email that you haven't opened in
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: a month and it is so overwhelming you're like, I
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: can't open that, I can't, it's just But then you do,
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: and then you spend an hour kind of working through
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: it and you've kind of chipped away at it. Then
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: before you know it, after doing this for about you
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: know a week, you know, spending an hour or half
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: an hour on that in that inbox. Then it's just
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: the thoughts that are coming in that day. So some
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: of us think, I tried sitting with my thoughts. It
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: was horrible, never doing that again, but it's like, no, no,
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: it's never going to be that bad. The first time
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: you sit, it's very overwhelming because all we've ever done
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: is pacify ourselves social media, there is that TV. I've
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: got a distract destructor districtor I can't just sit with
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: my thoughts or walk alone with my thoughts. But then
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: the second time you're like, oh, it's less it's less intense.
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: Then by the tenth time you're like, oh, it's just
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: this one thing that I've got to think about. How
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: could I have refrained that differently? How could I process
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: that differently? Next time? Cool? Next, you know, So then
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: you start you become really good at self regulating. If
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: you don't allow yourself time to be alone with your thoughts,
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: you struggle to self regulate. And that's why when we
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: get stressed, angry, anxious, will pacify, we'll distract. So definitely
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: a walk fifteen minutes reading a book is also great,
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: because that's that's your segue into it. If you're not
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: a reader, read because you're still distracted. But it's a
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: lot slower the way you consume and read a physical book,
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: not audio. Read a physical and I have an audiobook,
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: so whatever, but read a physical book because it's slower.
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: It allows your brain to slow down, to take things
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: in more. You're thinking as you're reading it, how you
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: always imagine what the scene would look like. It allows
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: for you to still have imagination and think and all
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: of that. So that's a really good segue. If you're like, well,
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: I can't yet sit with my thoughts, that's what you're
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: going to do. Read a book fifteen minutes, thirty minutes, Yeah,
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: and then you'll start to regulate your nervous system. I
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: love that.
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: I feel like you've mentioned a couple of things about
• 29:02
  Speaker 2: like morning routines, which is great and obviously is probably
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: one of the most important routine Like your morning and
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: your evening routines is acterally the most important thing. But
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: one of the ones we hear a lot about is
• 29:12
  Speaker 2: sunlight and getting sunlight in the morning and how important
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: that is.
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: Yes, it's huge, It's so important. It's like so we've
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: got this thing that we've all heard of. It's the
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: Cicadian rhythm. It's your clock, it's your internal clock. And
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: the thing that really sets your circadian rhythm into like
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: the into a really healthy twenty four hour cycle is
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: sunlight in the morning. And there's this condition called seasonal
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: effective disorder, and in countries where it's really dark in winter,
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: people get this like temporary depression over the darker months
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: because they're not getting enough sunlight. And the way to
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: treat the symptoms of seasonal effective disorder is through these
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: like intense light therapy boxes that they sit in and
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: then it actually makes them feel better. It reduces or
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: eliminates these depressive symptoms because they're in this intense light
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: the mornings. Right, especially in Australia, even in winter, we've
• 30:03
  Speaker 1: got great source of light. So getting out into the
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: light as early as you can in the day for
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: you everyone's going to be different. But getting ideally get outside,
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: don't just be inside with it, get outside, get some
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: direct sunlights. And also the sun is the greatest source
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: of like cortisol, one of the greatest sources of cortisol,
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: and you want your cordsolt to be hind in the morning.
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: I think a lot of people are like, reduce your
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: quardsole stress. Cortisol is also energy. So if we're doing
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: everything to reduce cortisol but also being on our phones,
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: it's kind of very counterintuitive. So what you want to
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: do is you want to wake up, obviously, have your electrolytes.
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: Then you want to get out into the sun. Ideally
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: couple that with a walk, so you're moving your body.
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: You're getting you blood flight, so that way you're killing
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: hamblets at one stone stack it exactly. Walk even walk
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: to get your coffee and then you know, come back,
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: you're getting sunlight. You're then getting this really nice, very nice,
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: healthy kind of spike of cortersol in the morning should
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: be the highest in the morning. That's when you when
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: it high, then it starts to kind of tape a
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: taper taper tape, and you want your cortisol to be
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: at its lowest at night. So this is why you
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: know a lot of people think it's all bad. It's
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: not all bad. The only time cortisol is bad is
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: when we're looking at chronic stress situations. If you are
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: under too much physical stress or emotional stress, what are
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: your thoughts on the whole, Like cortisole face. Yeah, Like
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: cortisola only occurs if you have chronically high levels of
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: cortisol and you have something called cushing syndrome. It's actually
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: a fallacy that you just having a coffee in the
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: morning is going to give you a puffy face that
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: is not well, well, I won't give you a puff
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: face because of cortisol. Like that, that's proven. So those
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: tiktokras that are like, oh my god, you have coffee
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: in the morning and that's why you've got it's cordisolv face. No,
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: So the puffy face thing might be due to other
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: things or water retention, whatever. But when you were talking
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: about cortisol and a puffy face, the thing with cortisol
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: is you've got to ask yourself, am I sleeping enough?
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: Am I if I train really hard? Because people also say, oh,
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: you shouldn't do hit training because it's going to chronically
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: elevate your levels of cortisol. Elevating it levels of cortisol
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: temporarily acutely is very good for you. So saunas I sparks,
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: hit training, whatever, your main thing is, am I recovering
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: the only time hit training is going to be bad
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: as far as cortisol is. If you are training like
• 32:19
  Speaker 1: a dog and then never letting yourself have a rest
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: to day, you're always sore, it's starting to affect your sleep.
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: Then yes, then it's a problem. Yes, But if I
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: do a hit session and then a recovery day and
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: then like maybe a walk and then maybe But if
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: I have a really holistic training approach, then having those
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: hit sessions is actually very beneficial to lower your cortisol overall.
• 32:40
  Speaker 1: So you get the spikes when you need them, and
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: then you get the dips when you don't want the cortisol.
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: People with chronic levels of cortisol mainly this happens with
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: emotional stress that's really high. That's what like really like
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: spikes people's cortisol above baseline, like for too long throughout
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: the day when they need cortisol, as in when they
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: need to perform, when I need to get on stage,
• 33:01
  Speaker 1: when I need to you know, physically perform or do
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: something or whatever it is, be motivated. It's not there.
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: I don't have that resource because it's always sitting a
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: bit higher. But I can't get the spike when I
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: want it. So people with healthy levels of cortisols that
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: have sun in the morning. Now that yeah, it goes
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: up and down kind of you know when they want it.
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: So you want to look at cortisol as a massive
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: energy source when needed. It's kind of like it's going
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: to be the push to get you to do something
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: like you want it. You just need to learn how
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: to kind of like harness it. Well, you touched on motivation.
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: Before, and I kind of want to loop everything that
• 33:35
  Speaker 2: we've spoken about because as always you've given like five
• 33:38
  Speaker 2: million tips, which is absolutely amazing. Gobble them all, like
• 33:42
  Speaker 2: you're so actionable's focus which is one thing that I
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: really really love about your books, your podcast, everything, and
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: I find it really really helpful a lot of the
• 33:51
  Speaker 2: time we like hear these theories, I'm like, yeah, but
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: how do I do it?
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: Like I need a step by step. So if you know,
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: anyone listening to this has been like, ah shit, like
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: that tick tick tick tick tick, Yes, what's their first
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: step today? The first thing that I would do if
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: I was inner rut right now would be I would
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: actually do a bit of a brain dump on paper,
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: because I talk about the difference between soft action and
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: hard action. Soft action is the very easy, actionable things,
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: the things we could like, you know, research, look up,
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: write things down, brainstorm. That's all the soft action and
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: hard action is actually doing the thing. But soft action
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: is very helpful because it helps us get excited for
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: the herd action. So I would start today with soft action.
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: I would get a piece of paper and I would
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: write down the things that aren't really working for me
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: at the moment, like things that I notice in my behaviors,
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: like I don't have a morning routine that's a simple one,
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: and why because maybe you know or you know I'm
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: scrolling on my phone, or I don't have a set
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: time to wake up, but whatever it is. And then
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: you could say, my space is really clouded. So everything
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: that you listen to in this episode, you can start
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: going and being like yep, yes and no this applies,
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: this doesn't apply. Write it all down, and then write
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: simple things that you could do with the resources that
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: you have, that you could implement over the next week.
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: So it could be I'm going to have a set
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: waking up time and it doesn't have to be it's
• 35:08
  Speaker 1: going to be five am. It could just be like, no,
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: it's just gonna be the same time. It doesn't have
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: to be a painfully early time. Just let's get a
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: beautifoo routine going electrolytes in the water. I'm going to
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: walk for fifteen minutes, think just basic, basic, basic, but
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: all within our control. And then you're going to maybe
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: pick the top to most important from that list, and
• 35:25
  Speaker 1: that's what you're going to implement. And then you want
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: to if you can implement those two and make it consistent,
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: then you add the third, the fourth and like kind
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: of like where you start to layer it. Ideally have
• 35:34
  Speaker 1: it stack if possible, so you can do two or
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: three at once. And yeah, but writing that down, I
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: think gives us a lot of clarity as to where
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: we are and where we want to be.
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: Well, we have covered a lot of ground today, but
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: as you probably remember, we like to wrap our episodes
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: with our guests by asking them the same sort of question,
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: which is what has been your biggest life lesson on
• 35:55
  Speaker 2: your journey so far? And I feel like you probably
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: since the last time we saw you, you've had a
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: lot of life changes.
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: I have, I have, so I think there's yeah, yeah,
• 36:06
  Speaker 1: there's a lot. So one of the things that I
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: was actually like really having like a lot of thoughts
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: around with the whole pregnancy thing. Is this whole identity,
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: the whole you know, because you hear so much about
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: people's identity, like losing your identity when you become a mother,
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: and I was like, I'm hell bent on that not
• 36:20
  Speaker 1: happening to me. So it's made me really, I guess
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: one of the life lessons that this has taught me
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: so far is to become really acutely aware of what
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: it is that forms my identity and why it's so
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: important to me. And a lot of the things you
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: know that end up being the things that are the
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: most fulfilling in your life is things like obviously, for me,
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: number one is like connection with people, like there, if
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: you've got sound connection with people, I think you're always
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: going to be okay, and like, you know, fostering that
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: and harboring that. And then another thing is for me
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: like really knowing what your non negotiables are every day
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: to be happy, and mine a huge one is alone time,
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: even if it's just ten minutes, Like if I can
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: get a pop for a long time and I've told
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: her on this, I'm like I don't care, Like, okay, fine.
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: The first few weeks when they're born. But like I
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: will always need some level of a loone time. If
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: you can do that for me, I can show up
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: as a better partner, Like that's just and you tell
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: me what you need and I'll do that for you.
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: But for me, it's like it's really identifying what are
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: my actual non negotiables that keep me functioning as a
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: happy person. And so that's yeah, something I've learned over
• 37:23
  Speaker 1: the last couple of months. So much for joining me.
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: Thank you for having a ray of Sundra.
• 37:28
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: And thank you Jeex for having us in your ear holes.
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: We love to be here. And shout out to m
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: I k Made for making this episode. Two roare Chicks
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: Happened by Chicky Chicks