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Transcript

How to Have Anal Sex for the First Time · Libido Lounge

• 0:04
  Welcome to the libido lounge where we focus on all things love, lust, and libido.
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  We believe that fabulous sex is important to health as exercise and good food.
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  Okay, everybody.
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  We're getting into a juicy topic today.
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  We're talking about anal sex as a way of bringing novelty into long term relationships.
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  So anal is a zone that a lot of people are trepidatious about exploring, and there's so
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  many nerve endings, and there can be so much pleasure in this part of the body.
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  And it's a great way of just mixing it up.
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  It's a great way of adding novelty.
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  It's a great way of adding pleasure.
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  And so how do you begin to do this in relationships?
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  So first of all, talk about it outside of the bedroom.
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  Talk about it, the level of interest.
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  Talk about it in a male female hetero relationship.
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  Talk about what it's like for both people to experience anal.
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  I've seen so many couples where the male is very trepidatious about exploring, about having
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  any sort of anal penetration himself.
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  Wherever you are at in this whole conversation, I just hope you keep an open mind.
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  And sometimes a little bit of play there can be a lot of pleasure.
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  So regardless from a female perspective or a male perspective, there's a few things to know.
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  So the first is if you're worried about any sort of grossness about that area, I would
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  definitely always encourage you, whether or not you're worried about it, to do anal play after
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  bathing.
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  Get everything nice and clean.
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  Really make sure that you've had a bowel movement that day.
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  You can also get something called an enema bulb, an anal enema bulb.
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  And this is just a little bulb where it has a stem on it, and the stem acts as almost like a
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  little speculum.
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  You can put a little bit of lube on the speculum, insert it anally, and there's water
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  in the bulb.
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  And that will basically then you just kinda squeeze the bulb that flushes the water up into
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  the rectum, and that will get if there's any other stool, there's anything left over, that
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  will get that out.
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  So from a standpoint then once we've taken cleanliness, you know, into consideration, then
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  the next thing I would encourage you to do is just have a session where you're just playing
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  with, like, that outer tissue.
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  Get some lube.
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  A good silicone based lube is really what's recommended for anal sex.
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  I'm a huge fan of Uber Lube.
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  I will put a link to my shop to get this Uber lube in the show notes.
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  And, essentially, with that, you the silicone is gonna be much more viscous than a water
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  based lube.
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  It's also really important to do this particular play with a somebody that is STI
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  free or that you are, you know, open to taking that risk essentially with because you're not
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  going to want to use condoms for anal play because if a condom comes off and gets stuck up
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  there, you're probably going to the hospital.
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  So you really this is a tends to be more of a condom free zone.
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  And so making sure that you're doing this from a safe sex perspective, testing partners, or
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  doing this in combination of a long term monogamous relationship.
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  That's I I tend to work with people in long term monogamous relationships where that the
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  STI thing is not so much of a of a concern.
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  Right?
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  But the the initial thing to really try oftentimes is just a little bit of lube,
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  silicone lube, and just play with the added tissue, and then just talk about it.
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  Talk about it afterwards.
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  What did you like?
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  What did you not?
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  That feels good.
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  Then you can explore with just a little tiny pinky inserted.
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  And you can slowly that's usually the way to work into this is slowly working your way up
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  from, say, small digits to bigger digits and just communicating about it every time.
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  This is a huge area of a lot of communication.
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  Usually, once you go for, like, full penile penetration into the anus, usually from that
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  standpoint, you want a lot of lube.
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  You wanna be really warmed up.
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  You wanna be gentle, but usually there's, like, an initial slight slide that needs to happen to
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  get the head of the penis into the the rectal canal.
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  And then once that happens, as long as there's enough lube, this can feel incredibly
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  pleasurable.
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  So this is a very different way of playing, I know, for a lot of people, but I'm really
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  working to help you guys have so many different options on novelty.
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  Right?
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  There's so many different ways of creating more unique combinations of pleasure and enjoyment
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  and hotness and sexiness in long term relationships.
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  And the biggest thing is just having some sort of system for not getting in the rut.
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  You know?
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  Think about the the top ones we've talked about.
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  Position, people, things, places.
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  Right?
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  These are the ideas.
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  Right?
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  And with people, I'm not saying that you're bringing another party in or some people do
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  that, but what I'm more suggesting there is, like, role playing.
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  Right?
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  Having fun with that.
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  So we've talked about a lot of this throughout the channel.
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  And I would encourage you at a minimum if you can at the absolute minimum have once a month,
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  switch it up night.
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  You know, where it's like, okay.
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  Once a month, there's a dedicated night to we're gonna actively put effort into trying
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  something new.
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  You know, if you can do that once a week, even better.
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  But at least once a month, some sort of hot, sexy, new, try something new, do research, have
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  a plan, flirt about it in advance.
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  It can do wonders for waking up that dopamine and desire zone.
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  And when you talk about it, you know, beforehand and you talk about it afterwards,
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  what I find is, like, even if it wasn't the most pleasurable thing and even if you're like,
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  hey.
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  I tried that thing, and I don't think I wanna do it again.
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  You know, what that allows is that closeness of connection, of communication, of openness
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  around something vulnerable and being received and talking through.
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  Okay.
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  Well, what is pleasurable?
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  What was not pleasurable?
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  What could we change?
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  Right?
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  So that level of intimate conversation can also be really hot and sexy and really help in those
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  long term relationships.
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  So please drop your comments in the show notes.
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  Share this with your friends.
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  See you next time.
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  Thank you for listening to the libido lounge.
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  Please share this with your friends.
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  You can find me on YouTube, on Instagram, as well as how to work with me at mylibidodoc.com.