Latest / Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot / 💥 Beyond the Map 5/7: Fear Doesn’t Get the Final Word #FinishStrongFriday

Transcript

💥 Beyond the Map 5/7: Fear Doesn’t Get the Final Word #FinishStrongFriday · Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot

• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Hey, family, welcome.
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: You did it.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: You are in Finish Strong Friday, right here in the sweet spot where science meets soul.
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: So I'm your host, dr Sweet Dr Derek Sweet, and you know by now that I'm a board-certified psychiatrist with a background in high performance and sports psychiatry, and you know by now, all week long we've been really tackling a pretty powerful topic, which is the idea of facing the unknown.
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: You know, what's amazing about our brains is that every time we push through something we don't know, something tough, something uncertain, we actually get better at handling the stress of that thing.
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: It's like we're building a muscle and the more we use it, the stronger it gets.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: Remember, we talked about yesterday this whole idea of neuroplasticity, of creating new pathways in the brain when we tackle the things that scare us and goodness knows we have enough uncertainty and enough unknown things occurring in our atmosphere, in our environment today that can be very intimidating.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: I'd like to share a story with you about a swimmer.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: I worked with an Olympic swimmer who literally was having so much trouble being afraid of losing and what he did was talk himself into I can't so that every time he had a match he literally was frozen with fear and he never left his room.
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: The fear was crippling when he was sitting in his room.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: He was terrified.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: So we had to work on the what-if monsters that we talked about all week long here.
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: We had to work on the idea that the unknown is not your enemy, the uncertain is not your enemy, that there might be a possibility that you could excel.
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: There might be a possibility that you could excel, that something amazing could happen in the middle of your handling and facing the unknown.
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: That if you were to work on the things you can control your breathing, your responses, the way you practice simulating the situation, visualizing it and seeing yourself as overcoming it you might just do very well.
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: And if you leave room for the possibility that your body and mind could respond, could use all of that anxiety and that fear that you feel and translate it into wow, this is not fear, this is just gasoline in my body that's prepping me and empowering me to feel better, so that this tremulous feeling is just more fuel for me to swim faster and you know what this sweat on my body makes me even faster in the water.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: Just reframing things, as we talked about this week reframing the uncertainty gives you power over it and understanding that the brain has sections the amygdala we talked about that this week the fear center of the brain we just can't let it run the show right.
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: We talked about the acc, the anterior cingulate cortex, the doubt center we have to quiet that down.
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: And we talked about the CEO of the brain, the prefrontal cortex.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: That can override a lot of things, but we can't let it get out of control either.
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: Finding balance, feeling the fear we talked about a book by Susan Jeffers.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: Feeling the fear, but doing it anyway.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: Not letting fear stop you.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: Do you know what happened to this swimmer?
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: He won a medal.
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: Oh, my goodness, he actually did it.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: So what's the lesson?
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: When you stick to something hard, your brain literally grows stronger.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: That's the message.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: It's wild.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: You're not just showing grit.
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: When you do this, you're building a better, tougher brain.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: I'm more of a neuroscientist than a psychiatrist, so I think that way, and I want you to think that way too that your brain has the capacity to take you there, especially when things get rough.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: Feel the fear, but do it anyway.
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: So there's another book that I wanted to talk to you about.
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: It's called.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: I love this book.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: It's called Grit the Power of Passion and Perseverance by Angela Duckworth.
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: She breaks it down so simply in this book.
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: She basically says that talent times effort gives you skill.
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: I'm going to say it again Talent times effort gives you skill.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: I'm going to say it again Talent times effort gives you skill.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: And then, skill times more effort equals achievement.
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: I know you want me to say that again Skill times more effort equals achievement.
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: But here's the real gem it's not about being the smartest or the most talented.
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: It's about staying in the game consistently, especially when others want to quit.
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: And when you want to quit, not negotiating with yourself.
• 5:41
  Speaker 1: Like Kobe Bryant said, I don't negotiate with myself.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: It's raining outside.
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: I'm not negotiating with myself not to go practice.
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: I'm not giving myself any excuses.
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: So here's what I've learned about staying in power.
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: On Finish Strong Friday Every time you push through, you make it easier for the next time.
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: That's how the brain works.
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: When you do six push-ups and you do that seventh push-up, you make it easier for the next time.
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: Here's what I've learned that uncomfortable feeling.
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: That's where growth happens.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: That's your growth zone.
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: You have a tough conversation.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: You have to have.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: You got to do it.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: Small steps every day, my friend.
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: Small steps every day that beats the big jumps now and then taking a big jump now and then, okay, it's impressive, but you know who's gonna beat you?
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: The dude or the gal who's taking small steps every day and practicing the same way every day, that person becomes super strong all right now.
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: So I want to leave you with this in Romans, the book of Romans, the scripture, it says this.
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: Why?
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: Because we know that in suffering, in difficulty, we become more perseverant, we persevere and our character grows in those moments.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: That's from the scripture.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: I didn't quote it exactly, but you get the idea.
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: Scripture, I didn't quote it exactly, but you get the idea that there's something about perfecting yourself in the middle of trials and tribulations and finishing what you start.
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: So your final challenge this week I want you to grab your journal, write down three times when you stuck it out and it paid off.
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: I want you to reflect.
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: Okay, you can't write.
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: Maybe you're driving the car right now and you're like doc, I can't write, I'll crash the car.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: We don't want that.
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: We don't want that at all.
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: I want you to just reflect, then, on why are you paying attention?
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: Okay, just reflect on times that you finish something, that you push through and remember when you do this, dopamine comes out and rewards you.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: It's important to remember when you do things right and you have finished and you are a finisher, and I'll bet those moments required exactly what you're building now the guts to face the unknown.
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: And when you're facing the unknown, that's what you do.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: You remember those times that God has brought you through.
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: You remember those times when you persevered, when you did the right thing, when an angel appeared, when somebody sort of extended a helping hand.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: There's got to be something you remember.
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: All right, now, this is Dr Sweet.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: You did it.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: It's Finish Strong Friday.
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: Thanks for rolling with me this week.
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: Hit me up on LinkedIn, hit me up on Instagram or threads, all right, and I can see you on YouTube as well.
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: Okay, now take care, I'll see you tomorrow.
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: You know what tomorrow is?
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: It's Self-Care Saturday and we're doing it, thank you.