Latest / Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps / Phone Tap: Couch Coach
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Sometimes we come up with some really brilliant ideas on
- 0:02Speaker 1: this show, and what You're about to hear is not
- 0:06Speaker 1: one of those. Okay, Because for the phone tap, we
- 0:09Speaker 1: enlisted Jose to be a professional couch coach to help
- 0:13Speaker 1: all the people working from home over the last few
- 0:15Speaker 1: years to get up and back into shape. There's a
- 0:23Speaker 1: company out there that sent a new fitness initiative to
- 0:26Speaker 1: all their employees, and apparently no one's taking it seriously.
- 0:29Speaker 1: So Jose is about to make a house call and
- 0:33Speaker 1: you'll notice at one point he almost breaks from just
- 0:37Speaker 1: one word. You're going to hear it your phone tap
- 0:39Speaker 1: right now?
- 0:40Speaker 2: Another on the twenties, Hello, what and two and three
- 0:48Speaker 2: and four?
- 0:48Speaker 3: And what? And two and three and four? How are
- 0:50Speaker 3: we feeling?
- 0:53Speaker 2: Hello?
- 0:54Speaker 3: Hi? Is this Heather?
- 0:56Speaker 2: Yeah?
- 0:57Speaker 3: Hi, I'm Julius. I'm your couch coach for of the day.
- 1:00Speaker 3: Are you ready to sweat from home?
- 1:04Speaker 2: What?
- 1:04Speaker 3: And three and four and three and four? No? What?
- 1:08Speaker 2: What is that? What's going on?
- 1:10Speaker 3: Oh? I'm sorry I didn't I'm from Home Flags Aerobics.
- 1:14Speaker 2: I've been hired by your company to help all you
- 1:17Speaker 2: work from homers get back in shape.
- 1:19Speaker 3: A wait, why are you trying?
- 1:22Speaker 2: I don't understand. What are you talking about?
- 1:24Speaker 3: Let's call. Let's call, It's called sister and what two up?
- 1:29Speaker 2: Hey? Can you please just turn off the music? I
- 1:31Speaker 2: can't understand what you're talking about. Well, if I turn
- 1:34Speaker 2: off the music, then our workout's gonna pause and it's
- 1:36Speaker 2: time to go.
- 1:38Speaker 3: Go go company? What are you turn off the music? Okay?
- 1:42Speaker 3: Now I'm sorry? What was your question?
- 1:44Speaker 2: Uh? Yeah, I have many questions. What is going on?
- 1:47Speaker 2: Who are you? What are you talking about?
- 1:49Speaker 3: What? I'm sorry? Did you not get the email?
- 1:52Speaker 2: The company send out an all staff email about the
- 1:54Speaker 2: new fitness initiative. No, oh, okay, I saw an email.
- 2:01Speaker 3: Okay, I read it.
- 2:02Speaker 2: So many of you are working from home now. They
- 2:05Speaker 2: want to help you lead a healthier lifestyle.
- 2:07Speaker 3: So once a.
- 2:07Speaker 2: Day they want you to take a ten minute work
- 2:10Speaker 2: break and focus on fitness with me, your couch coach.
- 2:14Speaker 3: Julie is yay, where Julie is? And three and four
- 2:18Speaker 3: and one and two and three and four? Take the
- 2:20Speaker 3: four and six. I'm sorry what I was working out
- 2:23Speaker 3: and you were? What did you say? You're right? I
- 2:26Speaker 3: was not, well, you should be.
- 2:27Speaker 2: Why would I think it's a minute break and listen
- 2:30Speaker 2: to this nonsense like, hey, they're grumpy puss.
- 2:32Speaker 3: Are you saying you don't want to get in shape?
- 2:36Speaker 2: Not like this.
- 2:37Speaker 3: I'm turning that five into a ten. You're gonna be
- 2:40Speaker 3: a dime when I'm done with you.
- 2:42Speaker 1: Girl.
- 2:42Speaker 3: Let's go hustle.
- 2:43Speaker 2: Hustle for the muscle and hustle and hustle, maybe tussle.
- 2:47Speaker 2: What do you do?
- 2:49Speaker 3: Here's what you do? Tell me a visual. Tell me
- 2:52Speaker 3: three things that are in front of you right now? Girl?
- 2:56Speaker 1: Uh, my computer?
- 2:58Speaker 3: Okay?
- 2:59Speaker 1: Wall a wall?
- 3:00Speaker 3: And what else?
- 3:02Speaker 2: I don't let TV?
- 3:03Speaker 3: I don't okay, So pick up that TV. Pick it up? Girl?
- 3:07Speaker 2: Is it mountains the wall?
- 3:09Speaker 3: It's a talking okay, then jump on it.
- 3:13Speaker 2: Jump on it.
- 3:14Speaker 3: And if it doesn't.
- 3:14Speaker 2: Fall on something attached to the wall, it's vertical. You
- 3:17Speaker 2: can do pull ups on it and just lift those
- 3:19Speaker 2: knees and one and two and pull and up and
- 3:24Speaker 2: down and down? And are you not doing it? Do
- 3:28Speaker 2: you not like your job? Are okay?
- 3:30Speaker 1: Sure?
- 3:31Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm totally doing it.
- 3:32Speaker 3: I knew it. I knew it, okay. And how much
- 3:35Speaker 3: fun are you having? None?
- 3:39Speaker 2: Listen, this is not.
- 3:40Speaker 3: Working like you think that.
- 3:41Speaker 2: You're just like yelling at me over the phone is
- 3:43Speaker 2: gonna be motivational because it's really not it. Okay, Heather,
- 3:47Speaker 2: can I be honest with you what I'm really out
- 3:51Speaker 2: of shape too. I gotta be honest with you. Why
- 3:56Speaker 2: you're doing this over the phone, because Y would do
- 3:59Speaker 2: this in person. Okay, let's be real. The company they
- 4:01Speaker 2: hired me, they never saw me either. I told them
- 4:03Speaker 2: I was a fitness trainer. But I gotta do these
- 4:05Speaker 2: calls and I'm exhausted, all right, But if you're on
- 4:08Speaker 2: the phone, I can't see it.
- 4:09Speaker 3: I don't even like walking, and I'm paying you.
- 4:11Speaker 2: To do that. I'm like baffled.
- 4:13Speaker 3: What is wrong A lot? You would actually be surprised.
- 4:17Speaker 3: I can't believe it.
- 4:18Speaker 2: But I haven't even given me a raise in three years. Well,
- 4:20Speaker 2: because you're to sound like you're motivated, you know this is.
- 4:23Speaker 3: How I sound. Oh what, I'm.
- 4:25Speaker 2: Actually doing the job and qualified to do the job.
- 4:27Speaker 2: You just said you're not even qualified.
- 4:28Speaker 3: Oh so am I I am now doing the job.
- 4:30Speaker 3: Look at me. I'm jumping, I'm twisting, I'm twirling. I
- 4:34Speaker 3: just hit a backflip.
- 4:36Speaker 2: But reality, I'm just hitting cheetos.
- 4:38Speaker 3: It's for you. It is doing no favors for my
- 4:41Speaker 3: blood pressure.
- 4:41Speaker 2: Don't tell the company. Okay, So I'm gonna hang up
- 4:44Speaker 2: now because this is no way productive. And I'm gonna
- 4:47Speaker 2: tell them that you're scamming them.
- 4:48Speaker 3: Okay, you can't.
- 4:50Speaker 2: Tell them that I'm scamming them because I'm scamming you
- 4:52Speaker 2: right now.
- 4:53Speaker 3: So they're not gonna believe a scam is gonna be
- 4:54Speaker 3: a scammer. And now we're all scamming each other.
- 4:58Speaker 1: What what does that even mean?
- 5:00Speaker 2: I should probably just tell you this is a phone brink.
- 5:03Speaker 3: Wait what we're a morning radio show. Your coworker Ada
- 5:06Speaker 3: set you up.
- 5:07Speaker 2: Oh my god, Ada said your company just sent on
- 5:11Speaker 2: a new fitness initiative to all the employees, but you
- 5:13Speaker 2: hadn't seen it yet.
- 5:15Speaker 1: Because I thought you were a psychopath that I really
- 5:17Speaker 1: needed to like track down and get it.
- 5:18Speaker 3: Who says I'm not a psychopath?
- 5:20Speaker 2: And seven and nine and twelve, we're skipping numbers now
- 5:25Speaker 2: in forty seven fifty three. No, okay, you got your
- 5:28Speaker 2: point across. I get it, I get it.
- 5:32Speaker 3: Weeke up.
- 5:32Speaker 2: Every morning was phone taps weekday mornings on the twenties,
- 5:36Speaker 2: Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning