Latest / Doing Marriage Well / “I Was Your Clown”: Humour, Comfort, and Carrying the Weight Together
Transcript
- 0:005, 4, 3, 2, 1. Doing Marriage Well for March 5, 2026.
- 0:06I Was Your Clown. Humor and comfort, and carrying the weight together.
- 0:10Today's playlist offering is from 1976, Don't Go Breaking My Heart,
- 0:15sung by Elton John and Kiki D.
- 0:18It's playful, but it nails something many couples miss. When one is down,
- 0:22the other can make the moment lighter, or at least less lonely.
- 0:26Elton sings, when I was down, and Kiki responds, I was your clown.
- 0:30Everyone has down times. Sometimes a bit of humor is what we need.
- 0:34Other times we need a kind word. A silent hug or a long snuggle is sometimes
- 0:39the way to go, while other times what we need is, I'm praying for you and I'm
- 0:43here if you want to talk, followed by some space.
- 0:46Being what our spouse needs means we have to know and understand them.
- 0:54It won't be the same thing every time. And sometimes they may need something
- 0:58they'll push away the first time it's offered.
- 1:00Early in marriage, it's hit and miss. But if you work at it,
- 1:03you will learn what your spouse needs when they're down, stressed,
- 1:06worried, or overwhelmed.
- 1:08Kiki sings, you take the weight off of me. This is the beauty and power of sharing life together.
- 1:14Even when you can't help, you can make it feel less horrible.
- 1:18Sharing your worries and fears with an empathetic partner takes some of the weight off of us.
- 1:23Elton sings, don't go breaking my heart, and Kiki responds, I won't go breaking your heart.
- 1:28He expresses the fear she will break his heart, and she assures him she won't
- 1:32do it. I suppose we could say talk is cheap.
- 1:36Assurances matter most when they're backed by patterns, small faithful actions
- 1:42that make words believable.
- 1:44Beyond that, when your spouse exposes a fear such as this, you should make a mental note about it.
- 1:50Make an effort to reassure them with both words and actions.
- 1:54Don't make the mistake of taking their fear personally, because the odds are it's not about you.
- 1:59Our fears generally have roots in earlier experiences, sometimes from childhood,
- 2:06sometimes from past relationships.
- 2:08Not sure what your spouse most needs when they're down? Ask them when they're
- 2:12not down. Try something like When you're stressed What helps most? Humor? A hug? Prayer?
- 2:18Problem solving? Space? Or something else?
- 2:21This is Paul And for me Dressing a clown And for me Dressing as a clown Is not
- 2:27doing marriage well 2, 3, 4, 5 Ha ha ha.