Latest / Faithful Fitness With Coach Alex VanHouten / “Mindset Is a Lifeline: DK Kang on Faith, Grit, and Growth”

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“Mindset Is a Lifeline: DK Kang on Faith, Grit, and Growth” · Faithful Fitness With Coach Alex VanHouten

• 0:02
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Faithful Fitness Podcast for my Dad. Coach
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Alex Van Houghten helps you get stronger and mind, body,
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: and spirit. He believes that your body is a temple,
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: so taking good care of it is an actual worship.
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: I should know.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: I live with him every week. He brings truth from
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: the Bible, tool from science, and stories that will set
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: your heart on fire. May God bless you to become
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: everything He made you to be just one percent better
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: every single day.
• 0:29
  Speaker 3: So guys, this is Coach Alexvnton on the Faithful Fitness Podcast,
• 0:32
  Speaker 3: where we integrate faith, fitness and stewardship by becoming one
• 0:36
  Speaker 3: percent better every single day. I'm so excited about our
• 0:39
  Speaker 3: guest today, mister d K Kang.
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: What's up brother? How you doing today?
• 0:43
  Speaker 4: I'm doing well? How are you?
• 0:45
  Speaker 3: I'm doing excellent among being a martial artist and a
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: mindset writer, which I can't wait to talk about your
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: but the mindset metamorphosis. You are a fellow dragon ball
• 0:54
  Speaker 3: Z nerd. So to anybody listening who doesn't know what
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: dragon ball Z is, I can't help you, but I do.
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: You want to nerd out with DK before we go anywhere,
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: because he likes dragon ball Z. He's a big Vegeta fan,
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: which we might actually talk about later. And then also
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: he really likes Jackie Chan. So I got to ask, man,
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: favorite fight scene of old time? And it can be
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: one or the other, but I need to know, like,
• 1:15
  Speaker 3: if you were going to sit down and be like, hey,
• 1:17
  Speaker 3: I'm going to enjoy this fight scene as a martial
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: artist and a fan of both Jackie Chan and Vegeta,
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: what one do you have to pick?
• 1:26
  Speaker 4: If we're talking about Dragon ball Z, it would be
• 1:28
  Speaker 4: the original fight between Goku and Vegeta.
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: Ayah with the big command man the kayak finish. Yeah, okay,
• 1:37
  Speaker 3: my boys love that scene. We've we've watched that probably
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: I don't know, one hundred times at this point. Okay, okay,
• 1:43
  Speaker 3: what about for Jackie Chan ooh, favorite fight scene or
• 1:47
  Speaker 3: favorite favorite fight scene?
• 1:48
  Speaker 4: Man, Okay, I'm gonna take it back. I don't know
• 1:53
  Speaker 4: if you know the movie called Wheels on Meals.
• 1:56
  Speaker 3: That's so old school. I've seen it once and it
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: was all.
• 2:00
  Speaker 4: It's an old school movie. It's Jack Chan and Benny
• 2:03
  Speaker 4: the Jet. Your careras like amazing fight scene. I mean honestly,
• 2:09
  Speaker 4: I mean, like Benny the Jet. He literally blows out
• 2:13
  Speaker 4: candles with the hook kick. It's amazing And.
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: It was not Cgi. That was real stuff.
• 2:20
  Speaker 4: This is like the eighties. This is like real stuff. Yeah,
• 2:24
  Speaker 4: Like it was just like that was one of the
• 2:28
  Speaker 4: like that is like the maybe third movie that I
• 2:30
  Speaker 4: watched Jackie Chan, and I just my first movie I
• 2:32
  Speaker 4: watched was Romo in the Bronx, and I fell in
• 2:36
  Speaker 4: love with him. And then I watched like Drunken Master,
• 2:39
  Speaker 4: I watched Feels Hyena, and I just watched him like
• 2:42
  Speaker 4: just his training because I started training when I was
• 2:44
  Speaker 4: five in Marshall Art and so you know, Jackie Chan
• 2:48
  Speaker 4: was like he was like my Bruce Lee and the
• 2:51
  Speaker 4: things that he was doing. I was just like, wow,
• 2:53
  Speaker 4: Like this guy is like awesome.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 2:56
  Speaker 4: I just started like I'm like, how can I incorporate
• 2:58
  Speaker 4: some of that into my Yeah.
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: I just just so humble and sun about it too.
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  Speaker 3: That's the thing. Like I love Bruce Lee. Don't get
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: me wrong, I love Bruce Lee, but the man's so
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: serious about everything. Oh Like, and I even quote Bruce
• 3:11
  Speaker 3: Lee pretty frequently. But Jackie Chan has a way of
• 3:14
  Speaker 3: being like this dangerous martial artist who is just so
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: humble and has such a like peaceful demeanor around him
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: seems to set everybody at ease. My my favorite with
• 3:23
  Speaker 3: him is and I'm sorry to be annoyingly like you know,
• 3:27
  Speaker 3: mainstream or whatever, but I loved the synergy between between
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: him and Chris Tucker and Rush Hour. Like all of
• 3:34
  Speaker 3: their fight scenes are just so funny.
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: Which one of y'all kick me? It's just so good. Anyway,
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: thank you for that. Thank you. I'm gonna actually have
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: to go watch that. What was that? Meal?
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: Meals on Wheels, Wheels on Meals is meals on meals
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  Speaker 3: wheels and Meals on Wheels is a ministry. So Wheels
• 3:52
  Speaker 3: on Meals Okay, all right, I'll have to go check
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: that out.
• 3:55
  Speaker 4: There's a funny story with that, really quick.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah.
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  Speaker 4: So he originally named it Meals on Wheels, but he
• 4:02
  Speaker 4: renamed it to Wheels on Meals because in China there
• 4:06
  Speaker 4: was like all these titles that were coming out with
• 4:10
  Speaker 4: movies were named with an M and they were just
• 4:13
  Speaker 4: like failing at the box office. So then he flipped
• 4:16
  Speaker 4: it and then he's like, we're going to change it
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  Speaker 4: to Wheels on Meals And that's kind of.
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: Nice, humble and smart.
• 4:22
  Speaker 3: Also, actually that leads me to this mindset conversation your book,
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  Speaker 3: Mindset Metamorphosis. I really appreciated the book. I thought it had.
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: A real.
• 4:32
  Speaker 3: Stephen Kobe how to win friends and influence people vibe,
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: except it was about how to do that in yourself.
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  Speaker 3: It wasn't about you know, getting the most out of
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: people or making people think a certain way, which Stephen
• 4:45
  Speaker 3: Kobe's book was great, but it wasn't about influencing other people.
• 4:48
  Speaker 3: It was about influencing yourself. And the entire time I
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: was reading it, I kept thinking about the verse in Romans.
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: I think it's chapter twelve where Paul says, being not
• 4:59
  Speaker 3: conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing
• 5:03
  Speaker 3: of your mind, And in the entire book really spoke
• 5:06
  Speaker 3: to that. Very very useful, very very practical, very easy
• 5:10
  Speaker 3: to read, but not it not shallow. So so that
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: that said, I wanted to dive into some things here
• 5:16
  Speaker 3: that that you cover in your book that we can
• 5:18
  Speaker 3: kind of expand on here in the podcast. And I
• 5:20
  Speaker 3: have the link for our listeners. I have the link
• 5:23
  Speaker 3: in the show notes below so you can go pick
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: up DK's book Mindset Metamorphosis. But I got to ask first,
• 5:29
  Speaker 3: you said in your book, you said, mindset to me,
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  Speaker 3: this this training that I'm about to write and the
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: tools that I've included here, this is a lifeline to me.
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: Can you unpack what that means the the that mindset
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  Speaker 3: is a lifeline to you.
• 5:47
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so a lot. It means a lifeline to me
• 5:50
  Speaker 4: because it's really like when everything is going out of
• 5:56
  Speaker 4: out of your own control. Like so, for instance, I mean,
• 5:59
  Speaker 4: my wife had a bunch of health issues. You can
• 6:03
  Speaker 4: go watch another podcast I did with six Weeks to Fitness.
• 6:06
  Speaker 4: I kind of dive deep into it. My wife was
• 6:09
  Speaker 4: diagnosed with cancer. All these things was like out of
• 6:12
  Speaker 4: my control. But like one thing I had in control
• 6:16
  Speaker 4: was was how I approach It was like my mind
• 6:19
  Speaker 4: was my mindset, and so you know, I could look
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: at it as like, oh what was us? Why is
• 6:25
  Speaker 4: this happening to us? Like why is why can't we
• 6:28
  Speaker 4: have children? Why can't you know? Why does my wife
• 6:31
  Speaker 4: have cancer? Why did I lose my job after her
• 6:35
  Speaker 4: cancer diagnosis? And I go into that in another podcast
• 6:38
  Speaker 4: I don't know watched it.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: But.
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  Speaker 4: You know, but having that mindset shift, it's like, Okay,
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  Speaker 4: I can choose to look at all the negative, but
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: I can also choose to look at the positive or
• 6:54
  Speaker 4: maybe I don't know what this is going to like happen,
• 6:58
  Speaker 4: or what it's maybe gonna somebody else, because somebody else
• 7:02
  Speaker 4: might be going through that, And so it's really reframing
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: those negative things those because I think our biggest like
• 7:12
  Speaker 4: our big biggest critic is ourselves, honestly, like oh I
• 7:16
  Speaker 4: didn't I didn't do enough push ups, or I didn't
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: I didn't do enough x y Z. And I think
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  Speaker 4: that goes back to the spiritual sense, like when we
• 7:24
  Speaker 4: look at works, we think that it's like, oh, I
• 7:29
  Speaker 4: need to do X y Z to please God. But
• 7:32
  Speaker 4: then it's like no, like God has already He's already
• 7:36
  Speaker 4: sent his son, his son died on the cross for us,
• 7:40
  Speaker 4: and his grace is sufficient, or else there's no amount
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  Speaker 4: of work that we can do to please God. But
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  Speaker 4: it's also a choice, like you know, your mind frame
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  Speaker 4: is your choice. You can you can choose to go
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  Speaker 4: do like you know, like my wife was diagnosed cancer,
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  Speaker 4: I'm like I can choose to like, oh, life is over,
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  Speaker 4: what are we gonna do? This is a bummer. Well
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  Speaker 4: there's nothing I can do, But what I can do,
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  Speaker 4: I can choose how I look at it, how I
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  Speaker 4: frame things, and that's for me. That's why it was
• 8:18
  Speaker 4: a lifeline for both the bus because I mean there
• 8:21
  Speaker 4: were days where it was just hard, like we were
• 8:24
  Speaker 4: like we don't know, like I don't know where income
• 8:28
  Speaker 4: is going to come in, like because I lost my
• 8:30
  Speaker 4: job from February twenty twenty four and then we didn't
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  Speaker 4: have any income from February to all way to December. Man,
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  Speaker 4: so like really no income. I mean I had a
• 8:41
  Speaker 4: part time job, but it wasn't like bringing in much money.
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  Speaker 4: And we're like, okay, God, like this is it. Like
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  Speaker 4: we're gonna choose faith, We're gonna choose our mind and
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  Speaker 4: you know, like Roman says, to transform our minds and
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  Speaker 4: what is that? Like that's not be worldly. Let's dive
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  Speaker 4: in God's word and see what he says, and all right,
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  Speaker 4: we're gonna go on faith and we're just gonna do
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  Speaker 4: this like and I'm going to stay by her side
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  Speaker 4: and no matter what. So so that that was the
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  Speaker 4: lifeline for us.
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  Speaker 3: Awesome, awesome, and like in the in the present day,
• 9:17
  Speaker 3: the word mindset is is a buzzword. A lot of
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  Speaker 3: people will say mindset and there's there's a lot of
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  Speaker 3: secular ideas around that, and actually a lot of psychological research,
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  Speaker 3: which some of it you you cite in your book.
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  Speaker 3: That's that's very useful and practical, and I want I
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  Speaker 3: want believers to understand that that mindset's not a new
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  Speaker 3: modern thing. This is actually something that that uh, Paul
• 9:40
  Speaker 3: in The New Testament talks a lot about. I quoted
• 9:42
  Speaker 3: him just a second ago, but I'm going to quote
• 9:43
  Speaker 3: another and I'm going to quote it because this one
• 9:45
  Speaker 3: I don't have is memorized as well. I always mix
• 9:47
  Speaker 3: up some of the words, so I'm going to read
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  Speaker 3: it directly. But Philippin's for you says, finally, brethren, whatsoever
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  Speaker 3: things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are
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  Speaker 3: just pure, lovely of good report, if there be any virtue,
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  Speaker 3: any praise, think on these things. So he's saying, take
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  Speaker 3: the active control that you have over your mind, which
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: isn't always a lot, but just a little bit, take
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  Speaker 3: the active control that you have your on your mind,
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  Speaker 3: and put the spotlight over your mind on the things
• 10:17
  Speaker 3: that are worth ruminating, hoping, praying, believing. Put your mind
• 10:24
  Speaker 3: on those things regardless. And you know, Paul gets quoted
• 10:27
  Speaker 3: a lot because he wrote most of the New Testament,
• 10:29
  Speaker 3: but he gets quoted a lot specifically because if you
• 10:31
  Speaker 3: think of you know, mindset work in a bad day,
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: let's talk about getting shipwrecked, beat up, thrown in jail.
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: You know, in his mind.
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: Constantly is is God has placed this in my life
• 10:44
  Speaker 3: for a reason. I'm going to glorify him with this opportunity.
• 10:47
  Speaker 3: Doesn't matter if I'm hungry, it doesn't matter if I
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: got a lot of money. It doesn't matter if I
• 10:50
  Speaker 3: have friends or no friends, it doesn't matter. I'm going
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: to I'm going to make the most out of this opportunity.
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: I'm going to be a good steward with my mind
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: in this moment. And So one of the things that
• 11:01
  Speaker 3: you talk about in your book that I think is
• 11:03
  Speaker 3: intensely practical, I think is worth worth chatting through here
• 11:06
  Speaker 3: is the difference between a fixed mindset and a growth mindset.
• 11:09
  Speaker 2: And in many.
• 11:10
  Speaker 3: Ways, as I understand these these two concepts, a growth
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  Speaker 3: mindset is really the starting point for all of these
• 11:18
  Speaker 3: tools that you open up in your book. We'll talk
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: about a few of them, but again to the listeners,
• 11:23
  Speaker 3: if you want to get all these tools, I need
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: you to click on that link and check out DK
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: King's book, Mindset Metamorphosis.
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: So in your book, you spend.
• 11:33
  Speaker 3: The time to talk about the difference between a fixed
• 11:35
  Speaker 3: mindset and a growth mindset. Can you can you help
• 11:39
  Speaker 3: my listeners understand that well? And I'll see if I
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: can articulate it just as well as you do after that?
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: Okay, so kind of So, a fixed mindset is basically
• 11:50
  Speaker 4: like you're like, that's the end the line, Like I
• 11:53
  Speaker 4: don't have nothing else to learn, and you get comfortable
• 11:57
  Speaker 4: and so like if you look at a growth mindset,
• 12:01
  Speaker 4: like I think about like martial arts, like everybody starts
• 12:04
  Speaker 4: at a white belt, you know, very beginner, you don't
• 12:06
  Speaker 4: know anything, and then you progress, you know, into the bells,
• 12:10
  Speaker 4: you become a black belt. But there's something that my
• 12:12
  Speaker 4: instructor said to me when I was pretty young, and
• 12:16
  Speaker 4: he said, every time you walk into that door, you
• 12:19
  Speaker 4: are a white belt. I was thinking about it. I
• 12:22
  Speaker 4: was like, I'm looking at him, like, dude, I'm a
• 12:24
  Speaker 4: black belt, Like what are you talking about. It's that
• 12:27
  Speaker 4: mind It's that humbleness of like, Okay, I'm willing to
• 12:31
  Speaker 4: learn something new, something more. How can I improve my technique?
• 12:36
  Speaker 4: How can I improve my fitness? How can I improve
• 12:38
  Speaker 4: my nutrition? Like all these things. It's not just like
• 12:41
  Speaker 4: one and done, you know, you kind of that which
• 12:44
  Speaker 4: is like the fixed mindset, we're like, oh, I learned
• 12:47
  Speaker 4: everything I can. There's nothing to learn. I'm good, I'm comfortable.
• 12:52
  Speaker 4: Get out of my comfort zone. But with that growth,
• 12:55
  Speaker 4: it's like you know, it's like it's like children, they're
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: always growing. They're like sponges. They just want to observe everything.
• 13:02
  Speaker 4: And I think there's so much to learn in this world,
• 13:05
  Speaker 4: Like you can study the Bible for your entire life
• 13:09
  Speaker 4: and you still don't understand it because God says like
• 13:11
  Speaker 4: there are things that we are not meant to understand.
• 13:14
  Speaker 3: And so that's that's such a good example. So like
• 13:16
  Speaker 3: a like when I think of it fixed mindset, growth mindset,
• 13:20
  Speaker 3: it's it's a way of understanding that that if I'm
• 13:23
  Speaker 3: in a fixed mindset, I and tell me if I'm
• 13:26
  Speaker 3: getting this right, I believe that there's nothing more I
• 13:30
  Speaker 3: can learn like that that what I've learned currently is
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: either one sufficient which is dangerous, or too it's not sufficient.
• 13:38
  Speaker 3: But I can never learn what I need to learn right.
• 13:41
  Speaker 3: I think about my son, I have a my my
• 13:44
  Speaker 3: ten year old. He's he's a very bright kid, very
• 13:47
  Speaker 3: very quick minded, and he's very gifted. In a lot
• 13:50
  Speaker 3: of ways. Things come easy to him. When he comes
• 13:53
  Speaker 3: up against something that actually requires effort, that actually challenges him,
• 13:59
  Speaker 3: his immediate response to that is like, I'm never going
• 14:02
  Speaker 3: to be good at this, you know, because he expected
• 14:03
  Speaker 3: it to instantly click. You know, he's he's playing the
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: drums right now, he's learning the drums, and and you know,
• 14:09
  Speaker 3: he's got the perfect personality for he's he's the most
• 14:12
  Speaker 3: fidgety kid. He's got great rhythm, you know, he's he's
• 14:14
  Speaker 3: moving and grooving and stuff.
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: But but drums are hard.
• 14:17
  Speaker 3: It's hard to make your left foot do something different
• 14:20
  Speaker 3: from your right foot while your right hand does something
• 14:23
  Speaker 3: different from your left hand. And then you're I mean,
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: I don't know how many bands you've listened to. You like,
• 14:27
  Speaker 3: you're the guy who keeps everybody on rhythm so you
• 14:31
  Speaker 3: can't mess out.
• 14:32
  Speaker 4: Yeah, so they put all four things plus in rhythm
• 14:35
  Speaker 4: and like don't mess it up at coronation. Yeah, so
• 14:40
  Speaker 4: I would agree that would be like a fixed mindset,
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: but also like that that negative self tongue, like, oh
• 14:45
  Speaker 4: I will never be good enough.
• 14:47
  Speaker 3: H and and and for him, the bridge. The bridge
• 14:50
  Speaker 3: here is because he expected to pick up the drums
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: and immediately be great at it, which I mean, you
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: and I both know better, but you know, for a
• 14:57
  Speaker 3: ten year old, it's like, oh, yeah, it's the drums.
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: I've seen, will play them. I can do that. No
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: you can't. No, you can't.
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: Like you got to coordinate everything right, and so and
• 15:05
  Speaker 3: so he expected to be immediately good at them. And
• 15:08
  Speaker 3: when he tried and couldn't get his body to do
• 15:11
  Speaker 3: what he was telling it to do, he was immediately defeated.
• 15:15
  Speaker 3: He was immediately And that's that's a perfect example of
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: a fixed mindset. I'm not good at drums. I'll never
• 15:21
  Speaker 3: be good at drums. They're not for me. I see
• 15:22
  Speaker 3: this in fitness all the time. Running's hard, I'm never
• 15:25
  Speaker 3: going to be a runner. Lifting weights hurts. I'm never
• 15:28
  Speaker 3: gonna lift lift heavy. You know that that sort of thing.
• 15:31
  Speaker 3: And and what I told him was, of course you're
• 15:34
  Speaker 3: terrible at the drums.
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: Of course you're you're just started.
• 15:37
  Speaker 3: Do you think people who are good at drums just
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: sat down and played one day.
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: No, it's not natural.
• 15:43
  Speaker 3: But but if you're willing to practice. If you're willing
• 15:48
  Speaker 3: to put in the effort, what I can promise is
• 15:50
  Speaker 3: you'll get better every day, and you'll get better every
• 15:52
  Speaker 3: day for a very long time. And and so and so,
• 15:56
  Speaker 3: being trying to be a good father, I don't know
• 15:58
  Speaker 3: if this is the best way to do things, but
• 16:00
  Speaker 3: being a good father, I said, you're going to practice
• 16:02
  Speaker 3: twenty minutes a day, whether you like it or not.
• 16:03
  Speaker 3: I want to hear those drums and they could be
• 16:05
  Speaker 3: the most terrible sounding drums in the world, and you
• 16:07
  Speaker 3: could try replaying the same rhythm every single time, right,
• 16:10
  Speaker 3: But but you need to practice. And you know, fast
• 16:13
  Speaker 3: forward three weeks later, he's in there playing I had
• 16:15
  Speaker 3: the tiger.
• 16:16
  Speaker 2: Oh nice, Yeah, I can hear it.
• 16:22
  Speaker 3: I also, your day is every martial artist's anthem, you know, right,
• 16:31
  Speaker 3: So he's in there in their playing and you know
• 16:32
  Speaker 3: he's got a long way to go to to learn
• 16:34
  Speaker 3: a bunch of fills and all that stuff. But but
• 16:37
  Speaker 3: that is the growth mindset is saying, hey, I might
• 16:39
  Speaker 3: not know this yet, but there's always an opportunity to
• 16:43
  Speaker 3: become better. And and in my mind, that's a choice.
• 16:48
  Speaker 3: What do you think about that?
• 16:49
  Speaker 4: Is?
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: It?
• 16:49
  Speaker 3: Is it a choice to be Hey, I can grow,
• 16:52
  Speaker 3: I can learn, and I'm willing to try. Like what
• 16:54
  Speaker 3: what has to happen there to convert from a fixed
• 16:57
  Speaker 3: mindset to a growth mindset?
• 17:00
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean I think just we as society is
• 17:03
  Speaker 4: so like beaten down with the negative with everything on
• 17:07
  Speaker 4: the news, and it's really to like, you know, there's
• 17:11
  Speaker 4: that saying like it takes ten positives to get rid
• 17:13
  Speaker 4: of that one negative, you know, And so it's that repetition,
• 17:18
  Speaker 4: you know, And and I just feel like people just
• 17:22
  Speaker 4: aren't they don't have that grit of the repetition. Like
• 17:26
  Speaker 4: there's there's a quote that I love from Bruce Lee.
• 17:29
  Speaker 4: I'm not scared of the man who's practiced ten thousand kicks,
• 17:33
  Speaker 4: But I'm afraid of the man who's practiced one kick
• 17:36
  Speaker 4: ten thousand times, Like he get you with that one kick, Man,
• 17:39
  Speaker 4: he's gonna blow you away, Like right right. It's that repetition.
• 17:44
  Speaker 4: And I think so many of us just we want
• 17:46
  Speaker 4: a quick fix, want to and we want instant gratification,
• 17:51
  Speaker 4: but that's not how life works. And I think we
• 17:56
  Speaker 4: just as like people as a society, especially here in America,
• 17:58
  Speaker 4: that like, hey, put some work in, like you don't
• 18:02
  Speaker 4: become a black belt overnight. Rome wasn't built in a day.
• 18:07
  Speaker 4: I mean the world that God was building wasn't even
• 18:11
  Speaker 4: built in a day. So why do we as humans expect, Oh,
• 18:16
  Speaker 4: I want this business to be done. Oh I want
• 18:18
  Speaker 4: a six pack right now, Like I want a great
• 18:21
  Speaker 4: relationship with God. Like, no, it takes time and it's repetition.
• 18:26
  Speaker 4: If you want to have a relationship with God, be
• 18:29
  Speaker 4: in his word every single thing, like whether it's five minutes,
• 18:33
  Speaker 4: start small, but and build up. Don't just read the
• 18:38
  Speaker 4: Bible for twenty four hours and I don't want to
• 18:39
  Speaker 4: know God. Like no, that's I mean, that just doesn't
• 18:43
  Speaker 4: work that way, you know.
• 18:44
  Speaker 3: So now I will say to people about reading the Bible,
• 18:48
  Speaker 3: and I love to hear what you think about this.
• 18:49
  Speaker 3: I believe reading the Bible is always beneficial. It was
• 18:53
  Speaker 3: I think it was Chesterton who said that the that
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: the one of the powerful things about the Bible is
• 18:58
  Speaker 3: that a child can get in as if it were
• 19:01
  Speaker 3: a pool, a child can get in without drowning. So like,
• 19:04
  Speaker 3: if you can read, you can read the Bible. But
• 19:08
  Speaker 3: theologians have been swimming around in the deep end and
• 19:10
  Speaker 3: still haven't reached the bottom after thousands of years, right,
• 19:14
  Speaker 3: And what I tell individuals about reading God's Word is
• 19:18
  Speaker 3: that that you might read it now and certain things
• 19:21
  Speaker 3: will stand out to you that are important for your
• 19:25
  Speaker 3: faith journey right now. And whether you're a super baby Christian,
• 19:29
  Speaker 3: maybe even a non believer like you're like, I'm interested
• 19:31
  Speaker 3: in this Bible thing.
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: I don't really know what it says it. You will learn,
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: you will grow, right.
• 19:37
  Speaker 3: But you come back to it regularly. Why because the
• 19:41
  Speaker 3: words don't change, but you do. And there's things in
• 19:46
  Speaker 3: there that you couldn't see, that you couldn't understand, that
• 19:49
  Speaker 3: you couldn't you couldn't grasp until you have reached a
• 19:53
  Speaker 3: certain level of maturity or had certain experiences in your
• 19:57
  Speaker 3: life that brought new new me to the bones, so
• 20:01
  Speaker 3: to speak, of the words. But a growth mindset is
• 20:05
  Speaker 3: that choice I'm going to show up repeatedly because that's
• 20:10
  Speaker 3: how I grow.
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: That's how God made it.
• 20:11
  Speaker 3: Actually, scientifically speaking, the way our brain connects to our
• 20:15
  Speaker 3: body and the way our nervous system connects to our muscles,
• 20:20
  Speaker 3: it's it's the repetition over time that makes those pathways work.
• 20:26
  Speaker 3: So I'm training a lady right now. She had two
• 20:28
  Speaker 3: knee replacements, and after her knee replacements, as you can imagine,
• 20:33
  Speaker 3: it kind of changes the way the body relates to itself.
• 20:38
  Speaker 3: The tibia and the femur, they're they're not really moving
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: like they used to. The quadricept kind of has to
• 20:42
  Speaker 3: act on the joint in a different way. So so
• 20:44
  Speaker 3: she couldn't squat, like she couldn't sit down on the
• 20:49
  Speaker 3: toilet behind her because she had lost that connection. And
• 20:54
  Speaker 3: the only way to relearn how to squat is squatted.
• 20:58
  Speaker 3: And so she had to, you know, and we had
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: to rebuild the muscle, and we had to get her
• 21:03
  Speaker 3: balance right, and we had to get the form right
• 21:05
  Speaker 3: and stuff. But after several months, she could squat again
• 21:08
  Speaker 3: and she could move because the repetition over time, not
• 21:12
  Speaker 3: one squat like ten thousand squads. The repetition over time
• 21:16
  Speaker 3: connected the mind to the muscle, and now it just works.
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: That's how That's how God made it.
• 21:23
  Speaker 3: So, so you talking in your book, one of the
• 21:27
  Speaker 3: aspects of the growth mindset versus the fixed mindset is
• 21:31
  Speaker 3: identifying negative thoughts and then reframing them.
• 21:35
  Speaker 2: But you kind of walk through a process.
• 21:37
  Speaker 3: You identify a negative thought and then you write it
• 21:41
  Speaker 3: down to externalize it and then you reframe it.
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: So can you for me and my listeners, can you
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: give us.
• 21:47
  Speaker 3: An example of maybe a negative thought that you've wrestled
• 21:50
  Speaker 3: with and what it looks like to write that down
• 21:53
  Speaker 3: and to reframe that.
• 21:55
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I was really quick to kind of go back
• 21:58
  Speaker 4: to what you're talking about, like reading the Bok every day,
• 22:00
  Speaker 4: and you know, the Bible says that the God's word
• 22:05
  Speaker 4: is alive and active, and that you know that that's
• 22:08
  Speaker 4: transforming us when we're at in that moment because ten
• 22:13
  Speaker 4: years ago I read the same scripture, It's going to
• 22:15
  Speaker 4: mean something completely different from where I'm at now because
• 22:17
  Speaker 4: I'm in a different by situation, different just situation in total,
• 22:21
  Speaker 4: you know, and so and then I look at them,
• 22:23
  Speaker 4: I'm like, Oh, that's what it means in this moment.
• 22:26
  Speaker 4: Go back to what you're saying with that question with
• 22:30
  Speaker 4: reframing negative. Like for me, there are times where I'm like,
• 22:36
  Speaker 4: I'm like just thinking what do I do or can
• 22:41
  Speaker 4: I don't know if I can handle this, Like with
• 22:43
  Speaker 4: my wife having cancer, both no income. I'm like, but
• 22:47
  Speaker 4: then I'm like, I just need to take a step
• 22:50
  Speaker 4: back breathe, and I'm like, all right, what is What
• 22:55
  Speaker 4: does that mean to reframe it? Well, it means like,
• 22:57
  Speaker 4: all right, well what can I do right now? Okay?
• 23:02
  Speaker 4: I can? We can change our diet because we're reading
• 23:05
  Speaker 4: a bunch of nutrition books. We're reading about cancer and
• 23:07
  Speaker 4: how to how to beat it with nutrition. I'm like, okay,
• 23:11
  Speaker 4: let's let's implement what they are talking about.
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: Ah.
• 23:17
  Speaker 4: One thing was we were reading about broccoli sprouse, and
• 23:22
  Speaker 4: you know, for me, I could I could think like, oh,
• 23:25
  Speaker 4: just because I read it in a book, that's not
• 23:27
  Speaker 4: going to be correct. But then I started diving deep
• 23:32
  Speaker 4: into it, I'm like, all right, broccoli sprouse grow our own.
• 23:35
  Speaker 4: So there's ten times more? Was it cancer and fighting
• 23:40
  Speaker 4: ingredients like the self what I can't even pronounce it,
• 23:44
  Speaker 4: the self fame thing they mentioned in the book, But
• 23:49
  Speaker 4: it has ten times more than actual broccoli. We're like,
• 23:53
  Speaker 4: all right, let's incorporate it into our smoothies, let's incorporate
• 23:56
  Speaker 4: it into our diet. And and so you know, I
• 24:01
  Speaker 4: think not only just like reframing those negative thoughts, but
• 24:05
  Speaker 4: it's really taken action, Like we don't know until we
• 24:09
  Speaker 4: actually take that action, like what the results are going
• 24:11
  Speaker 4: to be, or we can be set and just be
• 24:14
  Speaker 4: like a I'm just gonna go in the corner and
• 24:18
  Speaker 4: woe is me. Nothing changes though when you're doing this
• 24:22
  Speaker 4: negative self taught nothing only thing that changes is you
• 24:26
  Speaker 4: go into a depressive state. You go into this whole
• 24:30
  Speaker 4: and you just want people to like come to you
• 24:34
  Speaker 4: and like but sometimes people don't w't understand people know
• 24:39
  Speaker 4: how to like take care of you. So and it's
• 24:43
  Speaker 4: really that mental shift, and it's really like blocking out
• 24:47
  Speaker 4: negative things, like stop watching the news. The news is
• 24:50
  Speaker 4: so depressing. It's so negative and we don't know if
• 24:54
  Speaker 4: they're telling the truth or not. Like, but I think
• 24:58
  Speaker 4: just being in that positive like being in God's word,
• 25:00
  Speaker 4: Like there'se are so many positive things in reading God's word,
• 25:05
  Speaker 4: Like it changes your mental state in so many ways.
• 25:09
  Speaker 4: And you know, and just reading doing something positive like
• 25:12
  Speaker 4: reading positive books, being around positive people. I mean, I'm
• 25:15
  Speaker 4: not talking about like you know, like the toxic positivity,
• 25:20
  Speaker 4: which you know is a thing, but I'm just saying,
• 25:22
  Speaker 4: like when someone when you're down, like have someone to
• 25:26
  Speaker 4: bring you up and like then pick you up and like, hey,
• 25:29
  Speaker 4: how are you really doing? Like can I help you
• 25:32
  Speaker 4: with whatever you're dealing with?
• 25:34
  Speaker 3: Sometimes it requires another person in our life to help
• 25:37
  Speaker 3: us to reframe a negative belief positively.
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: Oh.
• 25:41
  Speaker 3: Actually, as you were speaking, I was I was reminded
• 25:43
  Speaker 3: of of something that happened in my life. I have
• 25:45
  Speaker 3: a family member who has a lot of chronic illness,
• 25:48
  Speaker 3: and at one point I was having a conversation with
• 25:52
  Speaker 3: this individual. In many ways, she had kind of given
• 25:54
  Speaker 3: up on not just things in life, but she'd really
• 25:59
  Speaker 3: kind of given up life. In her mind, she was dying.
• 26:02
  Speaker 3: And so we had this conversation and at at a
• 26:05
  Speaker 3: certain point that's what she said. She said, Look, Alex,
• 26:07
  Speaker 3: I'm dying, Like that's that's really, that's really what's.
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: Going on here.
• 26:11
  Speaker 3: And and I'm I've been accused of not being particularly compassionate,
• 26:16
  Speaker 3: and we can dive into that if if you want
• 26:20
  Speaker 3: to coaching is this very strange balance of encouragement and compassion.
• 26:24
  Speaker 3: If you're infinitely compassionate, then when somebody's having a hard time,
• 26:27
  Speaker 3: you're like, ah, they're there, you don't say hey, get up,
• 26:31
  Speaker 3: you got you got more in you.
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: You can make it.
• 26:33
  Speaker 3: And that's what a good coach does is is can
• 26:35
  Speaker 3: give encouragement without creating resentment, but really thick.
• 26:40
  Speaker 4: So we're talking about that your family member. I think
• 26:43
  Speaker 4: empathy also goes a long way, Like when we suffer ourselves,
• 26:48
  Speaker 4: we understand what that person might be going through. And
• 26:53
  Speaker 4: it's the same with Christ, like Christ suffered like painful
• 26:58
  Speaker 4: death like that, none of us can ever understand or
• 27:00
  Speaker 4: even like know what it feels like that kind of
• 27:03
  Speaker 4: pain physically, emotionally, aertually, like all the above, that empathy
• 27:07
  Speaker 4: goes a long way.
• 27:09
  Speaker 3: So I said to my family member who said, hey,
• 27:11
  Speaker 3: you know, I'm dying, And I said, I hate that
• 27:13
  Speaker 3: for you. We will miss you. But if you're going
• 27:16
  Speaker 3: to die, can you die trying? Wouldn't you rather die trying?
• 27:20
  Speaker 3: And it's like a switch flipped because a couple of
• 27:24
  Speaker 3: weeks later, they had started walking, they started changing some
• 27:27
  Speaker 3: things about their diet, they had started making a shift
• 27:31
  Speaker 3: in the way they practice things. And I got to
• 27:35
  Speaker 3: talk to them several months later and by the way,
• 27:37
  Speaker 3: they're not dead, like they're doing great. Several months later
• 27:41
  Speaker 3: and I'm like, okay, like what happened?
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: What changed?
• 27:43
  Speaker 3: And she said, you know, if I have to die,
• 27:45
  Speaker 3: I'm going to die trying. And she didn't even remember
• 27:48
  Speaker 3: our conversation, which is fine, Like I don't want to
• 27:50
  Speaker 3: take credit for it, but that but sometimes it requires
• 27:54
  Speaker 3: another person in our life to help us reframe that
• 27:58
  Speaker 3: that negative belief, gative belief.
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: Is I'm dying. And you know, from a perspective, it's like, hey,
• 28:04
  Speaker 2: so what we're all going to get there?
• 28:06
  Speaker 4: Right? Yeah, we're in this window, right, yes, yeah, like
• 28:09
  Speaker 4: we only see like this, but when this comes out,
• 28:12
  Speaker 4: they see different perspectives, different angles.
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: That's that's right.
• 28:17
  Speaker 3: And and and sometimes they can they can say hey,
• 28:20
  Speaker 3: look up or you know, it's like giving you a picture,
• 28:22
  Speaker 3: like look at this picture. See like there's something outside
• 28:25
  Speaker 3: of the window that you're looking at. So so yeah,
• 28:27
  Speaker 3: when you're talking about reframing, there was there was one
• 28:31
  Speaker 3: thing that that you mentioned in your book I think
• 28:33
  Speaker 3: is very very powerful, and it's bared it's bared out,
• 28:37
  Speaker 3: born out, it's born out in the psychological literature. When
• 28:40
  Speaker 3: we have thoughts in our mind that we need to
• 28:43
  Speaker 3: wrestle with, we gotta we gotta look at them and
• 28:47
  Speaker 3: flip them around and stuff. It's actually very powerful to
• 28:51
  Speaker 3: just write it down. You call it externalizing it. Can
• 28:55
  Speaker 3: you can you describe and there's some some useful tools
• 28:58
  Speaker 3: in your book about this, but can you describe how
• 29:01
  Speaker 3: externalizing things have have worked for you and your wife
• 29:05
  Speaker 3: through these these difficult seasons.
• 29:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean sometimes like to externalize, I mean, you know,
• 29:10
  Speaker 4: like journaling things like that, but sometimes it's getting that
• 29:13
  Speaker 4: like whatever you're feeling like out on paper. M h there,
• 29:19
  Speaker 4: there's there there's just something that happens to you, like
• 29:23
  Speaker 4: I know happens to me, just like just personally, Like
• 29:26
  Speaker 4: I don't know if it's like chemically or emotionally, but
• 29:29
  Speaker 4: there's just something like as you're writing it down, you're like, Okay,
• 29:32
  Speaker 4: oh I was feeling that, like I was feeling depressed
• 29:35
  Speaker 4: or I'm feeling overwhelmed, you know, whatever it is, and
• 29:37
  Speaker 4: then just getting it out into paper or digital or whatever,
• 29:41
  Speaker 4: and then actually like like seeing it like, oh I
• 29:44
  Speaker 4: did feel that there's there's something that happens. Like with me,
• 29:48
  Speaker 4: I'm just like okay, I'm able to express this but
• 29:53
  Speaker 4: not be like, not criticize it. I'm just like expressing
• 29:59
  Speaker 4: it whatever as it is. And it's just helpful to
• 30:05
  Speaker 4: because like I said, we're our own critics at the
• 30:08
  Speaker 4: end of the day, and we're gonna beat ourselves up
• 30:11
  Speaker 4: in so many ways. But just to write those things down,
• 30:15
  Speaker 4: it just speaks volumes because I think we're human beings.
• 30:19
  Speaker 4: We're like being in the moment. At that present moment,
• 30:23
  Speaker 4: I am feeling overwhelmed. Instead of talking to something, it's
• 30:28
  Speaker 4: like it's almost like therapy. It's like talking to somebody else,
• 30:30
  Speaker 4: but kind of talking to a piece of paper or whatever.
• 30:33
  Speaker 3: And doctor Pennerbaker's work, he wrote a book going through
• 30:38
  Speaker 3: the research of trauma journaling, specifically so going through a
• 30:42
  Speaker 3: traumatic time or remembering a traumatic memory from the past
• 30:45
  Speaker 3: and then writing it down. And I believe the book
• 30:49
  Speaker 3: is called Healing It Up by Writing It Down or
• 30:51
  Speaker 3: something like that, but it actually looks at the physiological
• 30:55
  Speaker 3: the immune system response that happens when you write difficult
• 31:01
  Speaker 3: things down right, And it actually turns out the more
• 31:04
  Speaker 3: painful it is to write it, the more it messes
• 31:08
  Speaker 3: your mood up in the immediate but the greater immune
• 31:11
  Speaker 3: system boosts you have thereafter, and interestingly, the lowered incidents
• 31:17
  Speaker 3: of depression, anxiety, and even actual illness six months from
• 31:21
  Speaker 3: the time that you write those things down. And you know,
• 31:24
  Speaker 3: he postulated that there's something biochemically that happens within us
• 31:30
  Speaker 3: when when we revisit something emotionally, but we put it
• 31:34
  Speaker 3: on paper that I have a theory. I don't have
• 31:37
  Speaker 3: a PhD, so they probably won't take this too seriously.
• 31:40
  Speaker 3: But my theory is we have a left and right hemisphere.
• 31:44
  Speaker 3: One of them's connected to language and the other ones
• 31:46
  Speaker 3: connected to emotion and feeling in general associatively speaking. So
• 31:50
  Speaker 3: imagine you have a feeling but you can't express it.
• 31:54
  Speaker 3: Writing it down requires that both hemispheres work on this
• 31:57
  Speaker 3: problems that exactly, And now we get everybody on the
• 32:01
  Speaker 3: same page because because they can talk to each other,
• 32:04
  Speaker 3: we're not owned by our emotions, right, but but our
• 32:07
  Speaker 3: emotions can be informed by that top down process too.
• 32:11
  Speaker 3: So if you write something down like I am overwhelmed
• 32:14
  Speaker 3: my wife has cancer, that's honest, that's real. It's very difficult, right,
• 32:19
  Speaker 3: But but now that you have that out in front,
• 32:22
  Speaker 3: you can actually walk yourself through the process.
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: Of is there anything I can do about that?
• 32:26
  Speaker 3: Now?
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: What?
• 32:27
  Speaker 2: Right?
• 32:28
  Speaker 3: And and that that gives you an opportunity to choose
• 32:31
  Speaker 3: a growth mindset or to choose how how am I
• 32:35
  Speaker 3: going to to manage this feeling and thing that I've
• 32:39
  Speaker 3: finally articulated and and it's it's very beneficial to do that.
• 32:45
  Speaker 4: I totally agree, Yeah, really quick to go back to
• 32:49
  Speaker 4: you know that your family member that was saying that
• 32:52
  Speaker 4: they're gonna you know they're gonna die. You know, it's
• 32:55
  Speaker 4: those like talks like that that it's basically like a
• 32:59
  Speaker 4: self fulfilling off to see that you're making to yourself.
• 33:02
  Speaker 4: So giving it. Give you example. So I do Spartan races.
• 33:07
  Speaker 4: I've done ten so far. I've done a fifty k, yeah,
• 33:11
  Speaker 4: the fifty k Ultra with sixty obstacles. So really quick
• 33:16
  Speaker 4: recap everything that went wrong went wrong with me. So
• 33:23
  Speaker 4: for me, I'm also a massage therapist. So you know,
• 33:26
  Speaker 4: I bring gloves with me because there's a rope climb.
• 33:28
  Speaker 4: I don't want, you know, my hands to burn things
• 33:30
  Speaker 4: like that because I gotta protect my hands. So I
• 33:33
  Speaker 4: lost my gloves. My tracker got hooked on one of
• 33:37
  Speaker 4: the obstacles. So I was already halfway down, like half
• 33:41
  Speaker 4: a mile down. I had to run another half mile
• 33:43
  Speaker 4: back up to pick up my tracker.
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: Dang it.
• 33:46
  Speaker 4: I had a nosebleed. I dropped a boulder on my
• 33:49
  Speaker 4: big toe. I tore the because I lost my gloves.
• 33:54
  Speaker 4: I tore the hands, the callous on my hands. I
• 34:00
  Speaker 4: ate way too many cliff bars, because you know, when
• 34:03
  Speaker 4: you're training for something, especially for an event, you don't
• 34:05
  Speaker 4: change what you've been already been doing. And then it's
• 34:08
  Speaker 4: this YouTube video where the guy's like, if you do
• 34:11
  Speaker 4: an Ultra of fifty K, you need to eat every
• 34:13
  Speaker 4: forty five minutes every hour at least like one hundred
• 34:16
  Speaker 4: to two hundred calories every hour, and so like, okay,
• 34:19
  Speaker 4: well it has one hundred calories to two hundred calories.
• 34:21
  Speaker 4: It was like a cliff bar. So I was eating
• 34:23
  Speaker 4: every hour, every forty five minutes, and that literally like
• 34:27
  Speaker 4: made my digestion just.
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: Like back so much fiber.
• 34:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I was like, this is terrible. And then I
• 34:33
  Speaker 4: also had three bags of hydration because I sweat a lot,
• 34:38
  Speaker 4: and so I would be passing people It's like, oh hey,
• 34:40
  Speaker 4: it's three bags and so but there were so many people,
• 34:44
  Speaker 4: so the ultra has had. My event had about six
• 34:48
  Speaker 4: hundred people, six hundred and twenty five and at the
• 34:53
  Speaker 4: end about three hundred and twenty five actually completed. Because
• 34:58
  Speaker 4: if you there's checkpoints, if you don't meet those, you'll
• 35:01
  Speaker 4: get a DNF. You know, did not finish. So I
• 35:05
  Speaker 4: mean I finished mine, but every time I kept passing
• 35:08
  Speaker 4: the people. And this is the second loop. After you
• 35:10
  Speaker 4: do twenty five k, you go back out and insane person,
• 35:15
  Speaker 4: you're going to go do another twenty five k with
• 35:18
  Speaker 4: another thirty obstacles, but saying like, oh, this is too hard.
• 35:22
  Speaker 4: I can't do this. Where's the finish line? Like I'm tired,
• 35:29
  Speaker 4: and all those people they did not finish the race,
• 35:32
  Speaker 4: Like I know they did not finish the race because
• 35:33
  Speaker 4: I hit the checkpoints like right before the cutoff line
• 35:37
  Speaker 4: because all my injuries and things like that that was
• 35:40
  Speaker 4: going on with me, Like but for me, I just
• 35:43
  Speaker 4: like I need to keep going the finish lines right there.
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: You know, the Bible talks about run the race as
• 35:48
  Speaker 4: if you're in the prize. Yes, with all these people,
• 35:52
  Speaker 4: and they said it, this is a fifty percent fail rate,
• 35:56
  Speaker 4: like half of you guys are going to fail this race. Wow,
• 36:00
  Speaker 4: pay three hundred dollars to be in this race. Half
• 36:02
  Speaker 4: of you guys are gonna fail. And it's that mindset
• 36:04
  Speaker 4: because they're already saying this is too hard, I can't
• 36:08
  Speaker 4: cross that finish line, and they it's self fulfilling prophecies
• 36:12
  Speaker 4: that they've already done, you know, So like the mind
• 36:16
  Speaker 4: is so powerful that we don't use it to the
• 36:19
  Speaker 4: fullest capability that we're created to do well.
• 36:23
  Speaker 3: And from a Christian perspective, I believe that requires an
• 36:26
  Speaker 3: encounter with God personally. So I read the Book of Job,
• 36:30
  Speaker 3: and given all the things that you've been through, I imagine
• 36:32
  Speaker 3: you've spent a lot of time meditating on it, right,
• 36:35
  Speaker 3: And so to those who haven't read Job, I'm going
• 36:38
  Speaker 3: to give you just.
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: A quick quick overview.
• 36:40
  Speaker 3: Basically, Job encounters the worst case scenario for a man
• 36:45
  Speaker 3: of his time, losing his children, coming down with illness,
• 36:50
  Speaker 3: losing all of his flocks, basically his entire everything he owns,
• 36:54
  Speaker 3: everything he cares about, including his own health, all it all,
• 36:58
  Speaker 3: for lack of a better way to put it, goes
• 37:00
  Speaker 3: to hell in a hand basket, right, And a big
• 37:02
  Speaker 3: piece of that is actually Satan. It's it's not just
• 37:05
  Speaker 3: like happenstance. It happens to be Satan ruining his life
• 37:09
  Speaker 3: to to see if he'll denounce God. That's the that's
• 37:12
  Speaker 3: kind of the framework for the story. And what happens
• 37:14
  Speaker 3: is Job and his friends sit down and most of
• 37:17
  Speaker 3: the Book of Job is them trying to rationalize through
• 37:22
  Speaker 3: why this has happened. You know, Is it because I've
• 37:24
  Speaker 3: I've done something wrong? Is it because you know it's
• 37:26
  Speaker 3: just the arbitrary malevolence of the universe. Maybe God's a
• 37:29
  Speaker 3: terrible thing like whatever. And in all this it says
• 37:33
  Speaker 3: that that Job never sinned against God. That job, that
• 37:36
  Speaker 3: Job never he questioned God. He was angry, he was hurt.
• 37:42
  Speaker 3: You know, he had a lot of things to say
• 37:43
  Speaker 3: about that. But what's really interesting is all of this
• 37:46
  Speaker 3: mindset stuff he's done doesn't get set straight until a
• 37:50
  Speaker 3: dude named Eli who shows up and he said, Hey,
• 37:53
  Speaker 3: you guys are speculating a lot, but how about we
• 37:55
  Speaker 3: invite God to the party, because you know, God's God's
• 37:59
  Speaker 3: a big God. He can answer for himself. And and
• 38:01
  Speaker 3: God shows up in Job, and and he shows up
• 38:04
  Speaker 3: in a whirld whin, And he doesn't say what people
• 38:06
  Speaker 3: would think you would say to somebody who's lost everything.
• 38:09
  Speaker 2: It's not like they're there.
• 38:10
  Speaker 3: He's he says something like, I'm God, I made everything.
• 38:15
  Speaker 3: Because I made everything, You're in the palm of my hand,
• 38:18
  Speaker 3: and and and so Job. Actually he repents, he he
• 38:23
  Speaker 3: he repents if all of his all of his thoughts
• 38:27
  Speaker 3: and all of his prayers and all of his anger
• 38:29
  Speaker 3: and all of his all of his you know, tying
• 38:31
  Speaker 3: himself up and knots and and it sets him straight.
• 38:36
  Speaker 3: And what what and Job ends really with with that
• 38:39
  Speaker 3: change in Job's life, not denouncing God like Satan thought
• 38:43
  Speaker 3: he would, but but actually coming to a place of
• 38:47
  Speaker 3: humility and honor at the same time and saying, you
• 38:50
  Speaker 3: know what, God, whatever you want, my life is yours,
• 38:52
  Speaker 3: like that your God. And and that that sets him
• 38:56
  Speaker 3: so straight, that that actually says that he he it
• 39:00
  Speaker 3: restores to him everything that he lost, and then something yes, yes,
• 39:06
  Speaker 3: and and on top of that very interesting. I find
• 39:08
  Speaker 3: this very interesting. Before everything's restored to him, this this
• 39:13
  Speaker 3: one verse right after, right after he repents before God
• 39:16
  Speaker 3: and dust and ashes, it says, and then God asked
• 39:19
  Speaker 3: Job to pray for his friends.
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: And so that's what Job does.
• 39:23
  Speaker 3: He basically lifts up his friends and like, help these
• 39:25
  Speaker 3: guys who who haven't had this conversation with you, Help
• 39:28
  Speaker 3: these guys who you know, we're willing to pin this
• 39:32
  Speaker 3: on things that that.
• 39:33
  Speaker 2: Weren't causal, that weren't weren't part of the process.
• 39:36
  Speaker 3: And so I think it's so crazy that that that
• 39:39
  Speaker 3: Job has to encounter God first before his mind is
• 39:43
  Speaker 3: set right, because our mind can tie us up into knots,
• 39:46
  Speaker 3: and and on top of that that that having encountered God,
• 39:50
  Speaker 3: he gets to share that praying, He gets to share
• 39:54
  Speaker 3: that with those around him in a life changing manner,
• 39:58
  Speaker 3: and then they get to see the fruit of that
• 40:00
  Speaker 3: because like, look at this guy. We knew him when
• 40:02
  Speaker 3: he was broken, unhealthy, had lost everything and stuff, but
• 40:06
  Speaker 3: he never denied and dead outs God and actually came
• 40:09
  Speaker 3: to a place of humility and honor in relationship with God.
• 40:13
  Speaker 3: And now like this dude has more than everybody else
• 40:17
  Speaker 3: and is fine. Like what's going on here? So I, personally,
• 40:22
  Speaker 3: when I think about the growth and fixed mindset thing
• 40:24
  Speaker 3: from a Christian perspective, I believe truly that that is
• 40:28
  Speaker 3: a work of the Holy Spirit. I believe truly that
• 40:31
  Speaker 3: that transformation in the mind that goes from I can't
• 40:35
  Speaker 3: do this, there's no other way out. I've reached the top.
• 40:39
  Speaker 3: That would be the Pride version of it, right or
• 40:42
  Speaker 3: I've reached the bottom and there's no way out.
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: That's the other version.
• 40:45
  Speaker 3: But that transformation to I'm going to take what God's
• 40:50
  Speaker 3: given me, whatever this little bit is. My body my mind,
• 40:53
  Speaker 3: my broccoli sprouts. I'm going to take what little I've
• 40:56
  Speaker 3: been given and I'm going to steward it well and
• 41:00
  Speaker 3: do so in faith and see what happens. And I
• 41:03
  Speaker 3: believe that that's that's the work of God in a
• 41:05
  Speaker 3: person's life. Do you I'm sure you've you've done some
• 41:09
  Speaker 3: meditating on Job in your your past decade or so.
• 41:12
  Speaker 3: Do you have anything to add to that or something
• 41:14
  Speaker 3: to share that that I might have sparked in you?
• 41:17
  Speaker 4: I mean, yeah, Job is just it's he's just a
• 41:22
  Speaker 4: great dude to look up to because at the end
• 41:25
  Speaker 4: of the day, we're all suffering in some form or fashion,
• 41:29
  Speaker 4: like and the Bible talks about, you know, in this world,
• 41:33
  Speaker 4: well we will have trouble with take hard because Christ
• 41:36
  Speaker 4: has overcome the world. I mean, it's pretty blatant that
• 41:40
  Speaker 4: we're gonna have trouble whatever that means. And I think,
• 41:43
  Speaker 4: you know, but if you look at Job, like all
• 41:46
  Speaker 4: the things that he suffered through, how much more can
• 41:51
  Speaker 4: here like relate to like and Jesus wasn't around at
• 41:54
  Speaker 4: this time, but she suffered crazy like. I mean, if
• 41:58
  Speaker 4: you look at if you just read the medical account
• 42:02
  Speaker 4: and like actual doctors going through what Jesus went through.
• 42:06
  Speaker 4: It's it's mind boggling, it really is. I mean, or
• 42:09
  Speaker 4: just go watch the Passion of Christ. But when when
• 42:14
  Speaker 4: you lose something, there's like really there's nowhere to go
• 42:18
  Speaker 4: but up and look up. I mean, God is up.
• 42:23
  Speaker 4: If you're at the if you're at rock bottom, look up,
• 42:26
  Speaker 4: because that's where that's where you're That's where we my
• 42:31
  Speaker 4: wife and I, that's where we got healing from. That's
• 42:34
  Speaker 4: where we found just peace because we don't know what
• 42:40
  Speaker 4: this is going to happen, where this is going to
• 42:42
  Speaker 4: take us. And like job, I mean he had all
• 42:45
  Speaker 4: kinds of stuff, He had all his money taken away,
• 42:48
  Speaker 4: kids dying, he had what is it, some sort of
• 42:51
  Speaker 4: skin disease or something like that. All things were just
• 42:56
  Speaker 4: going crazy for him. But he's just like I'm just
• 42:58
  Speaker 4: gonna trust in God, and like, yeah, Joe, Like I
• 43:02
  Speaker 4: always go back to Joe because it's like I'm like, Okay,
• 43:06
  Speaker 4: he went through a lot worse than what I went through.
• 43:08
  Speaker 4: I can I'm going through right.
• 43:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 43:11
  Speaker 4: I think it's just a great example because he was human,
• 43:13
  Speaker 4: you know, but not once did he curse God. Not once,
• 43:17
  Speaker 4: And I think that's just amazing.
• 43:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah, well, well said, well said, there's there's one more
• 43:22
  Speaker 3: element in your book. And again I'm encouraging listeners to
• 43:24
  Speaker 3: go go pick it up because from a mindset perspective,
• 43:27
  Speaker 3: there's just a lot of very useful tools throughout this book.
• 43:31
  Speaker 3: And the uh the idea that no is a healthy
• 43:39
  Speaker 3: thing for me, that the two letter word n o
• 43:43
  Speaker 3: is a healthy thing for me. This is recurring throughout
• 43:47
  Speaker 3: my coaching experience with clients. And let me explain what
• 43:51
  Speaker 3: I mean by that. Jesus told us to let our
• 43:53
  Speaker 3: yes be yes and our no be no. In other words,
• 43:56
  Speaker 3: let there not be a lot of gray area in
• 43:59
  Speaker 3: your speech. And I've extrapolated that to also mean it's
• 44:03
  Speaker 3: important that there's not a lot of gray area and
• 44:05
  Speaker 3: the way we orchestrate our day because because you know,
• 44:08
  Speaker 3: if anything that I say yes to I was teaching
• 44:11
  Speaker 3: my ten year old about opportunity cost, anything that I
• 44:14
  Speaker 3: say yes to is a no to something else. If
• 44:16
  Speaker 3: I say yes to doing this interview with you, which
• 44:19
  Speaker 3: by the way, has been very enjoyable, thank you. If
• 44:21
  Speaker 3: I say yes to doing this interview with you, that
• 44:23
  Speaker 3: is an hour that I can't spend on something else.
• 44:26
  Speaker 3: I can't spend it with my kids. I can't spend
• 44:28
  Speaker 3: it orchestrating the digital aspects of our business. I can't
• 44:31
  Speaker 3: spend it coaching clients. It's an hour spent doing this, right,
• 44:34
  Speaker 3: And so I've said yes to this and no to
• 44:38
  Speaker 3: everything else, but I've done so intention intentionally.
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: This wasn't an accident, right.
• 44:43
  Speaker 3: And for many individuals when they go throughout their day,
• 44:48
  Speaker 3: there's a lot of things that we can we can
• 44:50
  Speaker 3: spend our time doing that are on accident. I didn't
• 44:53
  Speaker 3: say yes to this, I didn't say no to this.
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: It's just there.
• 44:57
  Speaker 3: And it's hard for people, especially when it starts to
• 45:01
  Speaker 3: take a toll on their health or a toll on
• 45:02
  Speaker 3: their mental health, to feel like I don't have any
• 45:05
  Speaker 3: time to go for a walk, I don't have any
• 45:08
  Speaker 3: time to journal, I don't have any time to read
• 45:11
  Speaker 3: my Bible. I don't have any time to spend with
• 45:13
  Speaker 3: my family. Right, and what's important is a fixed mindset
• 45:18
  Speaker 3: versus a growth mindset. Says that if I'm in a
• 45:20
  Speaker 3: growth mindset, I start evaluating what is in my day,
• 45:26
  Speaker 3: what have I said yes to that maybe I need
• 45:28
  Speaker 3: to say no to? And then how do I make
• 45:31
  Speaker 3: my no strong enough? That the things I said no
• 45:34
  Speaker 3: to don't enter and you actually talk through how to
• 45:38
  Speaker 3: do that in the book, specifically with regard to when
• 45:40
  Speaker 3: people ask you for favors and how to do that
• 45:43
  Speaker 3: without burning any networking bridges. Right, So, can you talk
• 45:47
  Speaker 3: through how, in your experience with your wife and the
• 45:50
  Speaker 3: things that have gone on in the past decade, you
• 45:52
  Speaker 3: guys have had to say no to quite a few things.
• 45:55
  Speaker 3: Could you describe one of those situations for me and
• 45:58
  Speaker 3: help our listeners understand how they're no can create space
• 46:02
  Speaker 3: for for a growth mindset.
• 46:05
  Speaker 4: Yeah. I mean there were times when you know, so
• 46:08
  Speaker 4: my wife was going through chemotherapy and somebody would ask like, hey,
• 46:13
  Speaker 4: are you guys coming to church on Sunday and we're
• 46:15
  Speaker 4: like no, They're like and they at this point, I mean,
• 46:21
  Speaker 4: they didn't know, and and so you know, we had
• 46:24
  Speaker 4: to explain and then we're like, well, my wife is
• 46:27
  Speaker 4: i mean compromise at the moment, and you know, we're
• 46:31
  Speaker 4: just gonna have to do you know, online for now,
• 46:35
  Speaker 4: or you know, they invite us to like a birthday
• 46:37
  Speaker 4: party or something like that, and we're like, yeah, we're
• 46:39
  Speaker 4: gonna have to pass just just because we don't want
• 46:43
  Speaker 4: to get anything from the kids and things like that,
• 46:46
  Speaker 4: me included, you know, and so and so. But I
• 46:49
  Speaker 4: think it's just saying no in like in a respectful way,
• 46:54
  Speaker 4: but giving giving a reason behind it, not an excuse,
• 47:00
  Speaker 4: but like a legitimate reason of like hey, yeah, like
• 47:04
  Speaker 4: we're gonna say no. But then there's also times where
• 47:06
  Speaker 4: like we can spread ourselves so thin that we say
• 47:11
  Speaker 4: yes to everything and we don't we don't do any
• 47:14
  Speaker 4: self care. Like when we don't do self care, that's
• 47:18
  Speaker 4: when all these diseases happen. That's when stress goes off
• 47:22
  Speaker 4: off the charts. And then we're so bogged down, we're
• 47:25
  Speaker 4: not getting any sleep and we're not drinking any water.
• 47:29
  Speaker 4: And then now we just kind of feel almost obligated
• 47:32
  Speaker 4: to say yes because like they're like, oh, I said
• 47:36
  Speaker 4: yes to this, I said yes to that. But when
• 47:38
  Speaker 4: you're so beaten up and just stressed out because you're
• 47:41
  Speaker 4: saying yes so many times. And I think we as
• 47:44
  Speaker 4: a culture in the US, just said, can you get
• 47:48
  Speaker 4: do this extra project?
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: Oh?
• 47:50
  Speaker 4: Sure, you know, you know it's going to take an
• 47:52
  Speaker 4: extra three hours over time, But then, like you said,
• 47:56
  Speaker 4: that takes you away from family time, you know, especially
• 48:00
  Speaker 4: and and today we're in a remote society now where
• 48:03
  Speaker 4: it's like, oh, you're working from home, go ahead and
• 48:06
  Speaker 4: just knock this out. But I think at the same time,
• 48:09
  Speaker 4: is like, no, like to set those boundaries of like no,
• 48:14
  Speaker 4: I'm I'm literally off the clock at five o'clock. This
• 48:17
  Speaker 4: is my time spend with my family. Like and if
• 48:20
  Speaker 4: you set those boundaries like early on with you know,
• 48:23
  Speaker 4: your coworkers or your boss or whoever, they should respect
• 48:27
  Speaker 4: it and understand it. And so many of us are
• 48:31
  Speaker 4: just like, yes, I'll get this done, or does it
• 48:35
  Speaker 4: at the end of the day, does it really matter
• 48:37
  Speaker 4: to do this extra project? Like in the grand scheme
• 48:40
  Speaker 4: of things, is it Is it going to do anything
• 48:43
  Speaker 4: for you to make it to heaven? Is it going
• 48:45
  Speaker 4: to do anything for your kids? Well maybe financially, but
• 48:48
  Speaker 4: money is always there, Like it's always going to be there.
• 48:52
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 48:53
  Speaker 4: There's just pretty more.
• 48:55
  Speaker 2: Right. So I'll say this to my son. I could
• 48:58
  Speaker 2: say yes to this project.
• 48:59
  Speaker 3: And and I'm a business owner and I'm working to
• 49:03
  Speaker 3: teach my children what that looks like because you know,
• 49:06
  Speaker 3: I work in the online space. It's not like I
• 49:07
  Speaker 3: build houses, and so when you build a house, you
• 49:10
  Speaker 3: can say, look, kids, this is what I built. And
• 49:12
  Speaker 3: so so it's hard to show them what daddy does
• 49:15
  Speaker 3: for a living because it's not something you can put
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: your hands on always. You know, they see clients that
• 49:20
  Speaker 3: I work with and they see transformation and that's cool.
• 49:23
  Speaker 3: But I'll explain to my son. Look, I could say
• 49:25
  Speaker 3: yes to this project. I estimate it's going to take
• 49:27
  Speaker 3: twenty hours of my time, has a deadline in a week,
• 49:30
  Speaker 3: blah blah blah. If I say yes to this project,
• 49:32
  Speaker 3: I will make this much money. But if I say
• 49:36
  Speaker 3: no to this project, then I can take you and
• 49:39
  Speaker 3: your brother camping. And the question is, and this is
• 49:43
  Speaker 3: a real question, every dad has to answer it, even
• 49:46
  Speaker 3: moms too, is this amount of money worth saying no
• 49:51
  Speaker 3: to that other thing? Or I like to think of
• 49:53
  Speaker 3: it this way, twenty years from now, what I have
• 49:55
  Speaker 3: paid four thousand dollars ten thousand dollars to take my
• 49:59
  Speaker 3: kids ca again for a day or two? Right, and
• 50:02
  Speaker 3: and so so this no idea is actually it requires
• 50:08
  Speaker 3: a deep understanding of what your values are, what your
• 50:12
  Speaker 3: beliefs are. And unfortunately I have to use there's no
• 50:16
  Speaker 3: other way to say it but from a Christianese language
• 50:20
  Speaker 3: as a son of the Most High King. Is this
• 50:23
  Speaker 3: part of my assignment today? That's really the question. That's
• 50:26
  Speaker 3: really a question, And if it's not, it could be
• 50:28
  Speaker 3: a great thing to be up to, Like going to church.
• 50:30
  Speaker 3: There's nothing wrong with going to church, right, But is
• 50:33
  Speaker 3: this wise? Is this a part of what God's called
• 50:36
  Speaker 3: me to today? As a as a husband to a
• 50:38
  Speaker 3: wife who's immino compromised? The answer is no, Like the
• 50:41
  Speaker 3: answer is now, I'm here to serve my wife today.
• 50:43
  Speaker 3: We're going to spend this morning doing something differently, we
• 50:45
  Speaker 3: can still honor God. Right, And I'm not arguing that
• 50:48
  Speaker 3: you don't need to go to church. I'm arguing that
• 50:50
  Speaker 3: in that instance it's a great thing to be a
• 50:52
  Speaker 3: part of, just like an extra project at work, just
• 50:55
  Speaker 3: like this, you know, another thing that needs to happen.
• 50:57
  Speaker 3: This happens so much in the Christian community with regard
• 51:01
  Speaker 3: to service now, because if God's broken your heart to
• 51:04
  Speaker 3: serve others, what you'll notice is the needs in the
• 51:08
  Speaker 3: world are essentially infinite.
• 51:10
  Speaker 2: Yes, And you'll start to look.
• 51:12
  Speaker 3: Around and you'll start noticing all of them, and even
• 51:16
  Speaker 3: good hearted not necessarily trying to earn God's happiness, but
• 51:20
  Speaker 3: just in a.
• 51:22
  Speaker 2: Good hearted sense, just trying to meet all the needs.
• 51:25
  Speaker 2: At some point.
• 51:27
  Speaker 3: You run out of resources, you run out of energy,
• 51:29
  Speaker 3: you run out of money, you run out of time,
• 51:30
  Speaker 3: right and know no understanding your assignment, what God has
• 51:36
  Speaker 3: you here for? What's important and high priority in your life?
• 51:39
  Speaker 3: Your no shapes the organizations that you interact with, the
• 51:44
  Speaker 3: relationships that you interact with, and ultimately your day. So
• 51:49
  Speaker 3: from me to the listeners, if you find yourself in
• 51:51
  Speaker 3: a place we're having to say no regularly to stewarding
• 51:55
  Speaker 3: your body well, to getting enough rest, to drinking water,
• 51:59
  Speaker 3: to eat healthy foods, getting exercise. If you're having to
• 52:03
  Speaker 3: say no regularly to those things in you, I need
• 52:08
  Speaker 3: you to reevaluate your resources. As your coach, I'm telling
• 52:11
  Speaker 3: you to start looking in your life as it could
• 52:14
  Speaker 3: be just one little thing, one little thing you say
• 52:16
  Speaker 3: no to, but that will create the space to steward
• 52:19
  Speaker 3: your body well, because if you don't, it will catch
• 52:23
  Speaker 3: up with you. Sorry, I'm to get off my soapbox.
• 52:26
  Speaker 3: Do you have anything to add to that?
• 52:28
  Speaker 4: No, I mean I totally agree. I mean just I
• 52:30
  Speaker 4: think asking the question, like what's more important, what's more
• 52:34
  Speaker 4: invaluable to you as a person doing extra work or
• 52:40
  Speaker 4: spending time with my kids or your wife or whatever,
• 52:44
  Speaker 4: and really like evaluate like which one really is more
• 52:47
  Speaker 4: important because at the end of the day, your work
• 52:52
  Speaker 4: doesn't come home to your wife and kids, you know,
• 52:56
  Speaker 4: Like when your wife and kids or your kids are
• 52:58
  Speaker 4: all grown up, that's time that you just you just
• 53:00
  Speaker 4: completely missed, you know, and was it worth it? Like
• 53:05
  Speaker 4: I think just asking those questions like is this really
• 53:07
  Speaker 4: important that important? Is it more is more important to
• 53:10
  Speaker 4: work or is it more important to spend time with
• 53:12
  Speaker 4: my kids and watch them grow and teach them? And so, yeah,
• 53:15
  Speaker 4: I totally agree with what you're saying. And self care
• 53:18
  Speaker 4: is big, like yeah.
• 53:21
  Speaker 3: So so as we as we come to the end
• 53:24
  Speaker 3: of this conversation, I have I have to ask. So
• 53:26
  Speaker 3: I'm going to end on a on a lighthearted note
• 53:28
  Speaker 3: before I pray over you and your wife and your
• 53:31
  Speaker 3: your ministry. But I have to know why vegeta like So,
• 53:35
  Speaker 3: so I love I love dragon ball Z in my
• 53:38
  Speaker 3: mind and for those of you who don't know dragon
• 53:39
  Speaker 3: ball Z, it's it's an anime that I find so
• 53:43
  Speaker 3: fascinating because the core, even even my atheist friends like
• 53:47
  Speaker 3: dragon ball Z okay, and I always I think it's
• 53:50
  Speaker 3: so funny, Like you do realize that this is the
• 53:52
  Speaker 3: christ story, right, Greater love has no man than this,
• 53:55
  Speaker 3: that he would lay down his life for his friends. Goku,
• 53:58
  Speaker 3: the main character, his friends so much that he lays
• 54:02
  Speaker 3: down his life when the difficulty calls for it, and
• 54:06
  Speaker 3: then you know, they wish him back from the dragon balls.
• 54:08
  Speaker 3: Turns out he comes back to life. Has nothing to
• 54:10
  Speaker 3: do with Christianity in that sense, but it's the archetypal
• 54:13
  Speaker 3: story of the hero who's willing to give himself in
• 54:17
  Speaker 3: order to save the world ultimately.
• 54:21
  Speaker 2: And it's just that iteration over and over again.
• 54:23
  Speaker 3: And all Goku's friends look up to him and they're
• 54:25
  Speaker 3: trying to be like him, and they help him in
• 54:26
  Speaker 3: his adventures and stuff. But Vegeta is like Goku's first
• 54:30
  Speaker 3: arch nemesis, right, and through the story things shift and
• 54:35
  Speaker 3: change for Vegeta. But dude, the guy's got such a
• 54:38
  Speaker 3: crummy attitude for like, I don't know ninety percent of
• 54:41
  Speaker 3: the entire show, So I got as a guy who
• 54:44
  Speaker 3: seems to have been through it but also has such
• 54:48
  Speaker 3: a heart for people.
• 54:49
  Speaker 2: Why Vegeta?
• 54:52
  Speaker 4: Why Vegeta?
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: You know? For me?
• 54:55
  Speaker 4: A couple things, actually, I feel that. I feel like
• 55:00
  Speaker 4: that was me. I like, Vegeta is like totally me,
• 55:03
  Speaker 4: not like personalitywise, But so I have an older brother.
• 55:06
  Speaker 4: I was always trying to catch up to him, like
• 55:08
  Speaker 4: with and he's three years older than me. So I'm
• 55:12
  Speaker 4: always trying to catch up to him. Like he didn't
• 55:14
  Speaker 4: push up, I'm gonna do ten push ups still can't
• 55:17
  Speaker 4: catch up to him. I feel like that Vegeta. But
• 55:20
  Speaker 4: at the same time, as as a Christian, I look
• 55:24
  Speaker 4: at Vegeta as he is someone that is super relatable.
• 55:28
  Speaker 4: I've been there. I was in that dark moment. I
• 55:32
  Speaker 4: was in that dark place. I was that sinner who
• 55:37
  Speaker 4: had the bad attitude, who didn't care about people, who
• 55:41
  Speaker 4: you know, was doing random things like just sinning. And
• 55:47
  Speaker 4: I feel like Vegeta is so relatable to human the
• 55:51
  Speaker 4: human person, because we're all sinners. And then, as you know,
• 55:57
  Speaker 4: I'm gonna just say, Goku's kind of I guess the
• 55:59
  Speaker 4: christ I guess, and Vegeta comes in contact with him,
• 56:03
  Speaker 4: it starts changing his heart, his mind, and on who
• 56:08
  Speaker 4: he becomes. And if you look later on, like you know,
• 56:11
  Speaker 4: if you look at like Battle of Gods when Beer
• 56:15
  Speaker 4: slaps Boma and then he yells out, that's my boma
• 56:18
  Speaker 4: and goes on and crazy things like that. But I
• 56:20
  Speaker 4: think that that same shift is I was there at
• 56:24
  Speaker 4: that dark dark places before Christ. And so for me,
• 56:29
  Speaker 4: it's just like it's a reminder that it almost like
• 56:34
  Speaker 4: humanizes him. But at the same time, he's relentless. He's
• 56:40
  Speaker 4: relentless in like his training. He's I mean, he's relentless
• 56:44
  Speaker 4: as a family man as he grows, like and that's
• 56:48
  Speaker 4: like where we're at. That's where I'm at, Like I'm
• 56:50
  Speaker 4: still growing as a human being because I'm not in
• 56:54
  Speaker 4: heaven yet. Look at Goku is just like he's very
• 56:57
  Speaker 4: one dimensional and he's have you go lucky. He always
• 57:02
  Speaker 4: saves the day, you know, and Vegeta doesn't get the
• 57:05
  Speaker 4: love that the like I feel like Vegeta's kind of
• 57:08
  Speaker 4: like the Paul. Like Paul was like Christians, he was
• 57:13
  Speaker 4: I love that. You know, he gets blinded and then
• 57:16
  Speaker 4: scales gets off his eyes and then you know, because
• 57:20
  Speaker 4: God or Christ is like, why are you persecuting my disciples?
• 57:24
  Speaker 4: And so you know, so I feel like he's kind
• 57:26
  Speaker 4: of like the Paul. And really just because Paul he
• 57:30
  Speaker 4: wrote most of the New Testament, like you said, and
• 57:32
  Speaker 4: I feel like Vegeta doesn't get the shine that he should,
• 57:36
  Speaker 4: and not that he's better than Goku, but it's just
• 57:39
  Speaker 4: always that like, yeah, I just feel like he's just
• 57:42
  Speaker 4: that that Paul. Yeah, like I want to be like that,
• 57:44
  Speaker 4: you know.
• 57:45
  Speaker 3: Also in my mind, you know, but in the show,
• 57:47
  Speaker 3: like Vegeta is is the necessary struggle for Goku to
• 57:54
  Speaker 3: push him forward. Like there's so many times where if
• 57:56
  Speaker 3: it wasn't for Vegeta, Goku's done, like like and and
• 57:59
  Speaker 3: all of their friends, you know, and uh, it was
• 58:03
  Speaker 3: actually really interesting that I love the Cell saga. And
• 58:07
  Speaker 3: I've probably lost all of my listeners at this point
• 58:09
  Speaker 3: because they're like, what.
• 58:10
  Speaker 2: Are you talking about?
• 58:10
  Speaker 3: But but but I loved in the Cell saga where
• 58:13
  Speaker 3: where team Gohan is is is struggling with with Sell.
• 58:18
  Speaker 2: He's a half power there.
• 58:19
  Speaker 3: They've got this command a wave in the middle, and
• 58:21
  Speaker 3: it's really it's really do or die at this point,
• 58:23
  Speaker 3: like either everybody that Gohan loves is going to die
• 58:27
  Speaker 3: or or he's gonna be Sell and he's he's out,
• 58:31
  Speaker 3: he's got no more power in him. He's got his
• 58:33
  Speaker 3: dad in his ear, you know, trying to push him
• 58:34
  Speaker 3: forward and it's Vegeta who was just like crushed laying
• 58:38
  Speaker 3: the dirt, musters his last bit of energy, big bangs
• 58:42
  Speaker 3: him in the back, and he's like now he gives
• 58:44
  Speaker 3: him that split second and sells just toast and and
• 58:47
  Speaker 3: in a way that that is that is the the
• 58:50
  Speaker 3: redeeming power of vegetas.
• 58:52
  Speaker 2: That you're right, he was the guy.
• 58:54
  Speaker 3: He was the sinner who who's redeemed in the journey
• 58:58
  Speaker 3: of of well growth, like redeemed in the process of
• 59:03
  Speaker 3: of you know, becoming somebody completely different from who he
• 59:06
  Speaker 3: was before. And it's it's because he's in the right
• 59:09
  Speaker 3: place at the right time, using his gifts for the
• 59:12
  Speaker 3: right reasons. That that the well the journey continues, uh
• 59:16
  Speaker 3: and the adventure keeps going underway.
• 59:18
  Speaker 2: So so anyway, I.
• 59:19
  Speaker 3: Appreciate you, like be like I was like, Vegeta, that's
• 59:22
  Speaker 3: your favorite. Okay, well we got to talk about that.
• 59:25
  Speaker 3: So so thanks for thanks for being a nerd with
• 59:27
  Speaker 3: me on the on the podcast for dragon ball Z,
• 59:29
  Speaker 3: because I don't know anybody else who's going to talk about.
• 59:31
  Speaker 2: It with me.
• 59:35
  Speaker 3: Brother, I'm going to give you an opportunity to leave
• 59:37
  Speaker 3: our listeners with a last thought, and then I want
• 59:40
  Speaker 3: to pray over you and Florina and your your growing
• 59:43
  Speaker 3: ministry is as well as your business. So if if
• 59:47
  Speaker 3: somebody walks away from this conversation and we didn't lose
• 59:49
  Speaker 3: them talking about Goku and begeta, what do you want
• 59:52
  Speaker 3: them to take away from from our talk?
• 59:56
  Speaker 4: Uh? Honestly, I would say, don't be overwhelmed and start small.
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 4: Start take those baby steps whatever it is, whether it
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 4: be nutrition. I do have I talk about kimchi if
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 4: you're really interested in that, about it's a superfood and
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 4: things like that. But you know, whether it be nutrition, fitness,
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 4: your faith, your family, your friends, like, start small. Like
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 4: I said, nothing was built in a day, even the
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 4: world God that that God was building wasn't even built
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 4: in a day. And so I would say just start
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 4: small and keep going like you're only going to grow
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 4: and be better. I mean like your podcasts say, you say,
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 4: get one percent better, you know, and train hard, pray
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 4: even harder, right, like there's nothing better than praying, like
• 1:00:44
  Speaker 4: it's so powerful and effective.
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 3: Well, thanks for that, brother, and thank you for being
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 3: an excellent guest. I'm going to pray over you and
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 3: your wife and then we'll close us out here. If
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 3: you would pray with me. Father God, thank you so
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 3: much for this day. Thank you for the opportunity to
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 3: spend time with my DK, and thank you for the
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 3: road that you've led him through in his life over
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 3: this last decade. God, I pray your blessing and favor
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 3: on the lessons that he's learned and his willingness to
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 3: articulate faith in a mindset arena. God, I pray that
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 3: you would bless our listeners with the opportunity to move
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 3: forward with your Holy Spirit. Teach us to be good
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 3: stewards of the day that you've given us. It's the
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 3: day You've made, and I pray that we rejoice and
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 3: be glad in it. Bless the work of DK in
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 3: Florina's hands and give them guidance and wisdom as they
• 1:01:37
  Speaker 3: work how best to speak the truth of what You've
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 3: done in their lives and also to share some of
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 3: their struggles in a way that's beneficial to everyone. Thank you,
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 3: Lord for this podcast and the opportunity to spend time
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 3: with my brother in Jesus name.
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 2: Amen, DK.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 3: Thank you so much for being here, and to the listeners,
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 3: you guys know what I'm about to say next. This
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 3: has been coach Alex been Houton on the Faithful Fitness podcast.
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 3: Until next time, train hard, but pray harder.
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: Hey, if this episode helps you, jare it with someone
• 1:02:13
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• 1:02:17
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• 1:02:20
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• 1:02:29
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• 1:02:33
  Speaker 1: clicking on the links in the show notes below. We
• 1:02:37
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• 1:02:40
  Speaker 1: we do it together, so check out both links in
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 1: the show notes. Don't be a big well Bob, just
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 1: do it. Until next time, don't forget, Train hard and
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 1: pray even harder.