Latest / Libido Lounge / Why You Can't Tell Your Husband What You Want Part 2 with James Bullard

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Why You Can't Tell Your Husband What You Want Part 2 with James Bullard · Libido Lounge

• 0:00
  Your partner is your partner in many, many things, not necessarily all things.
• 0:07
  Your partner is not a 100% match.
• 0:10
  And if you look for it at a 100%, you're gonna be disappointed, which leads to resentment,
• 0:14
  which leads to an unhealthy relationship.
• 0:16
  Please drop that thinking right now.
• 0:19
  So much of the animosity comes from assumption instead of communication.
• 0:23
  Assumptions are what lead to resentment, and this comes to a point where we can fight, we
• 0:29
  can resent, we can assume,
• 0:31
  or we
• 0:31
  can just sit down and communicate.
• 0:35
  Hey everybody.
• 0:36
  Welcome back to another episode of the Libido Lounge.
• 0:39
  I'm your host, board certified sexologist, doctor Diane Mueller, and I am so excited to
• 0:45
  welcome back James Bouillard of the Radical Joy podcast and the Radical Joy, coaching program.
• 0:52
  We talked last episode about wanting and how how to actually ask for what you want and why
• 0:59
  as humans we don't do this, and how not asking for what you want actually impacts your life
• 1:05
  and your relationship and so much more.
• 1:08
  So definitely go back in and listen to that episode that was part one.
• 1:11
  You'll find that in the show notes.
• 1:13
  Now here in part two we kind of left an open ended question with James at the end of part
• 1:19
  one, which was he was teaching us how to talk to your partner and say, hey, I need to talk to
• 1:26
  you about some of my wants, and we kind of ask permission as the way I would sum up again.
• 1:31
  I'm kind of paraphrasing, so go back and listen to that last episode.
• 1:35
  But when we're asking our partner for what we want, we oftentimes do it in a way where
• 1:40
  there's the ability of our partner to say like, yeah, I will engage in this conversation or
• 1:45
  not.
• 1:46
  So the open ended question that we ended the last podcast with, which I am now going to ask
• 1:51
  James, is this.
• 1:54
  If we are talking to our partner about what we want and we're starting to say like, hey, I
• 2:00
  wanna share.
• 2:01
  I've been journaling some things.
• 2:02
  I want to share with you around this.
• 2:05
  Is this okay?
• 2:06
  Can I share this?
• 2:08
  Now most of the time, I think for most situations, our partner's gonna come back and
• 2:12
  say, like, yeah, I would love to hear about this.
• 2:14
  I think that's probably the most common answer, but what happens if our partner comes back and
• 2:20
  says something like, no, I don't actually want to hear that?
• 2:24
  What does that mean?
• 2:25
  Does that mean anything about the relationship?
• 2:27
  How do we navigate that if there's this fundamental desire to say share and our partner
• 2:35
  is resistant to hearing that share.
• 2:38
  Yes.
• 2:39
  I would love to go two ways with this.
• 2:41
  I'm sure there are more, but these are the two that I usually like to lean into most heavily.
• 2:45
  Number one, if your partner comes across with a no, great.
• 2:49
  That's why we have tribe.
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  This is so important.
• 2:53
  Your partner is your partner in many, many things, not necessarily all things, And we have
• 3:02
  to know this in the marrow of our being.
• 3:06
  They can be your ride or die in 86% of all the things.
• 3:10
  That leaves you 14% to find in other places.
• 3:15
  Not to mention the fact there might be another 9% that you prefer doing among your tribe where
• 3:20
  you're dropping your partner down to 75, and that is o k.
• 3:25
  Your partner is not a 100% match.
• 3:28
  You're not gonna find it.
• 3:29
  If you look for it at a 100%, you're gonna be disappointed, which leads to resentment, which
• 3:34
  leads to an unhealthy relationship.
• 3:36
  Please drop that thinking right now if at all possible.
• 3:40
  You will match with this person.
• 3:41
  They are your person.
• 3:42
  You continue to prioritize their feelings and their emotions, and that is amazing.
• 3:47
  And when they put up a boundary, you respect it, and you find another way to share this very
• 3:52
  important part of your life with someone who is equally important, just not that person who is
• 3:57
  your partner.
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  One.
• 3:59
  Two, you have opened the door.
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  You've offered it to them first.
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  They've politely yet clearly said no thank you.
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  You take it to tribe.
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  Now your partner continues to think about this, and that no becomes softer, and they understand
• 4:16
  that this is something that you want to share with someone that they find very important.
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  This is an important part of your life that you have to share with someone, and you're doing
• 4:23
  that with another important part of your life and tribe.
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  And as they ponder on that, they become more open, more malleable to the idea that you can
• 4:32
  share this with them as partner, and maybe they will eventually open that permission for you to
• 4:38
  share with them if you still want to do so, which is can be very important, can be a really
• 4:44
  interesting crossroads for you to meet, can be a little bit of a precarious situation because
• 4:48
  now they have put this trust in another member of the tribe, and now here comes a partner that
• 4:52
  wants to know as well.
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  Is this shared in both places?
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  It's important not to get too territorial.
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  It's important to understand that you first said no, and now you're starting to soften to
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  the yes, and you're getting it now as well unless that person says no.
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  It there's just always a give and a take.
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  How can I feel about this?
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  Am I entitled to be upset now that he put it somewhere else that he doesn't necessarily want
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  to share it here first?
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  There are so many fun things at play, it's so important just to keep an openness.
• 5:24
  Great.
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  I understand that I said no in the beginning.
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  I have changed my mind since.
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  I would love to know more about this if you're in a position to share, and being genuinely
• 5:33
  okay with whatever their answer is from there on.
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  I think those are two, at least two avenues where this could go.
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  It's real those are really, really great answers, and it actually takes me back to some
• 5:45
  of what we were talking in part one where we were talking in part one around identifying
• 5:50
  what you don't like and what you don't want as a step, as part of the multi step process for
• 5:58
  then figuring out what you do want.
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  And so I'm wondering too, is it ever a do you ever find it, like, to be beneficial for
• 6:06
  couples to sit down and say, oh, well these are, like, you know, one individual first, I
• 6:11
  guess, to do it individually to say, okay, well these are the things.
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  I identify what you, you know, want and don't want, and partner b does the same.
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  And then do you ever find it, like, advisable for them to kinda get their list together and
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  have a conversation around, okay, well these are the 75, you know, ish percentage of the
• 6:29
  things that I can fill and I can help you with, and these are the other things like I don't
• 6:34
  have much interest in.
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  Like, is it good to ever take that kind of approach where then there's almost this really
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  clear awareness where somebody could say, okay, well these are the 25 wants I have that my
• 6:45
  partner actually can't satisfy, but now I'm clear about this.
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  So I now know 75%, hey, we're gonna take these over here.
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  These other 25%, we're gonna divert to tribe.
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  Have you, do you work in that way with people?
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  Is that recommended at all?
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  Absolutely, it is.
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  I don't like showing up to anything with no preparation.
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  I want you to come with, like, honest to goodness, and I want you to take time.
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  I don't want you to throw down little, like, trifles.
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  That is not at all what I'm trying.
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  These are, like, things that are weighing on your soul and your heart, things that are
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  really pushing your needle in one way or another just so that you can bring it to the
• 7:22
  attention.
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  And the thing that I find most, which I find fascinating and delicious, is that whenever you
• 7:28
  see partners that are come into a forum with openness and a desire to understand, that
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  whenever the other partner actually takes those into consideration and genuinely starts to work
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  at the things where they can change, There is so much grace on both sides of the coin because
• 7:48
  they are trying.
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  They always wanted this information.
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  They just did not know how to ask, how to get it from the partner.
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  And now that we've entered into something with a genuine curiosity in hopes to build something
• 8:01
  stronger, it's beautiful to watch the way people respond to this, especially if they both
• 8:08
  come in with a very, with balance as a goal.
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  Sometimes you'll see one partner that tries far harder than the other.
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  That's a different conversation.
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  However, watching someone make that effort is almost always the thing that sets off that you
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  whatever the 25% is they just can't do, that partner never thinks about it again.
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  They aired the grievance.
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  They got the attention they needed, and the 75% that were really far more important are in
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  progress.
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  How wonderful.
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  People want to know that they're worth not working for, but at least being attentive for.
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  Beautiful to watch.
• 8:51
  It's cool, and what's coming up for me in thinking about just how people talk about
• 8:58
  frustrations, right?
• 8:59
  So sometimes I hear people use the term bait and switch, right?
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  Think a lot of people know what that terminology means, and so it it can be
• 9:08
  frustrating for people sometimes when I think in the beginning parts of a relationship it's
• 9:12
  like, oh, we're kind of trialing on and figuring out what fix it, what do we want, and
• 9:18
  what do we need, and if we haven't defined this, it's an experiment oftentimes to be like,
• 9:23
  okay, well, can I show up to this person that way?
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  And maybe we try it for a little while, and then all of a sudden it's like, no, this isn't
• 9:30
  me.
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  And it can feel to this other person almost like an abandonment, like, you led me on to be
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  like you were gonna show up for me this way, and all of a sudden you're not, and it can feel
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  really hurtful.
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  And so much of what I'm hearing and what you're saying is that we need to reorient around,
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  well, one, like we talked in episode one, that people do change and we can change our mind and
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  it can be very true one moment and all of a sudden we learn something about ourselves and
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  it's not true anymore, so it doesn't have to even though it can feel like a bait and switch,
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  it doesn't have to come from that, say, root feeling from, say, the baiter.
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  Right?
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  Correct.
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  And then also I think there's an element here where there's just so much grace and
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  forgiveness we can start to have when we can say, okay, well maybe this way this person
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  presented at one time was important to, you know, to me, but if we can just then add that
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  to the 25% or whatever that percentage is for that individual of what they can't serve and
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  reorient our focus to all these other ways that we can show up and be in relation together.
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  I can just feel the immense amount of forgiveness that can start to happen when we
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  start to pack and unwind this and we stop blaming this person for what they can't do and
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  instead celebrating what they can.
• 10:52
  I just want to take a quick break to say one of the number one things that leads to a lack or
• 10:58
  just a slowing of passion in the relationship is thinking that our partner's body and mind
• 11:05
  and spirit is going to be the same today as tomorrow.
• 11:09
  So one of the things that happens for so many bodies especially for female bodies is that
• 11:16
  with time, the pleasure needs change.
• 11:19
  And we get into those sexual scripts and those habits of doing the same thing over and over
• 11:25
  and over again, not always realizing that our pleasure body is wanting something else.
• 11:30
  This creates a lack of passion, a desire, a lack of orgasm, and it's one of the reasons why
• 11:37
  bedrooms can start to get quieter.
• 11:40
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• 11:49
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• 11:52
  Start with a free trial, stay for a month, stay for the year, make it yours.
• 11:59
  You'll see all of this and more and how to get started in the show notes below this video.
• 12:04
  I hope you will join me in my Hot Monogamy Society.
• 12:08
  Now, let's get back to our episode.
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  Agree.
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  Because all so much of this animosity, I don't love stickers, I don't like saying bad, I don't
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  like saying good, but so much of the animosity comes from assumption instead of communication.
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  This is what it was, this is what we decided however long ago when we had our little
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  meeting.
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  We have tried it for a while, and I now realize that the way they're showing up for me isn't
• 12:31
  something that I need.
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  And it's clear, or at least I observe, that this feels like it is taking a toll on them.
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  Let's talk about that.
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  Maybe take that off your plate because it's out of balance.
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  It's out of whack.
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  And people who continue to look for balance, I think that so much of the anger, frustration,
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  and resentment relationship come from people feeling like they're doing a lion's share all
• 12:56
  the time.
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  It's going to wax and wane.
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  Some people are gonna carry more of the burden during some points, and it's going to swap back
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  and forth.
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  When someone feels as though they are carrying a disproportionate amount of the effort in a
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  relationship, that's usually when things start to get a little heavy.
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  We have communication.
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  We talk about what it is.
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  How can we get this so that it feels like we have more of a shared experience in this
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  dynamic, in this relationship, so that we can move forward?
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  I know this isn't fun.
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  This is the nuts and bolts.
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  This is the part where I find out where I can serve you more effectively, and you can serve
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  me more effectively in my needs, and that way we keep it on an even footing.
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  It's so important because assumptions are what lead to resentment, and eventually, it can lead
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  to an explosion.
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  And personally, I hate being hollered at.
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  I hate being accused.
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  I hate finding my place in anywhere where someone is carrying something so long that they
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  can no longer bear the load of it, where if they had just mentioned it earlier when it
• 13:58
  became an annoyance instead of now, it's a it's it's just a a kilo of dynamite ready to dead
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  ready to detonate.
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  No.
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  Thank you.
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  Please tell me when the fuse is just getting stuck into the powder so that I can pull it
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  out, and we can look at something so that we can both feel perfectly or at least more well
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  aligned and more balanced in this dynamic.
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  Yeah.
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  Yeah.
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  I was driving.
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  I was road tripping with my partner and my three step kids yesterday, and there was a
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  point where he was driving and he realized that he was he just stopped paying attention, and he
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  was down to, like, the last 15 miles of gas, and the next gas station was about 13 miles
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  away.
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  So I made a not helpful comment.
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  Not mean, but also just not helpful.
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  Right.
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  And he did such a good job.
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  He just gave me a look, and he just took a deep breath, and he just kept on driving.
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  And that was all that was.
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  I made a comment, he took a breath, that was it.
• 15:00
  Right?
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  And so I ended up bringing it up last night, and I basically I was like, you know, I
• 15:05
  apologize, and he said he didn't I didn't do anything wrong.
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  And so what I had said to him was like, I may not have done anything wrong, but I also did
• 15:12
  not express something in a way that was helpful or kind, and I'm sorry for that.
• 15:18
  And so, you know, and so that I bring that up as an example because that's what I've seen in
• 15:22
  my own relationship of, like, these little things, right, that, like, it's it's so easy to
• 15:27
  just, well, we didn't really fight.
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  Like, it wasn't a helpful thing.
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  I kinda made a mistake.
• 15:31
  I that kind of I did make a mistake there, but it could have easily just been pushed under the
• 15:36
  rug, like, no big deal.
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  But having it was a I don't know.
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  It was a thirty, forty five minute second conversation last night at the end of the day
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  to just air it out.
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  Maybe it was two minutes.
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  It was like nothing.
• 15:48
  No big deal.
• 15:49
  And it stays no big deal because there's this tiny little thing, right, that's that fuse, but
• 15:55
  if those kind of things build and they build and they build and they build and we don't air
• 15:59
  them out, that's when it becomes that dynamite.
• 16:02
  So I think so often it's like we it's so easy to just almost, like, gaslight ourselves and
• 16:07
  gaslight the other person and be like, oh, that's not that big of a deal.
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  And while that might be true, the little things that are unsaid become very big deals.
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  As a man, as the guy who loves to drive and usually facilitates that sort of thing, Please
• 16:22
  understand so clearly when I tell you that is a huge, wonderful thing that you did.
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  Because even though it is not a big deal, because the front brain of mine says that is
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  not a big deal, The lizard brain, is protector and provider and who's driving for hours on
• 16:40
  end, does not need someone telling me this because I have lights and brains.
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  Yep.
• 16:47
  And I knew it as soon as I said it, James.
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  And it's it's but it's such a wonderful thing because I will never bring that up again.
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  I will never, as the guy if you had not if I were in that situation as your partner, I would
• 17:00
  not bring it up.
• 17:01
  However, the fact that you came to me after because you knew it landed not exactly where
• 17:06
  you wanted it to land, huge.
• 17:08
  That is so enormously impactful.
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  I don't even have the words for it because men especially get so little of things like that.
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  That's almost like a compliment.
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  Honest to goodness.
• 17:20
  I see what happened.
• 17:21
  I want to acknowledge it in not making a big deal of it, but I think it needs to be said.
• 17:26
  And then after forty five seconds to two minutes of conversation, I cannot tell you the
• 17:29
  peace and love that man is feeling in his guts for you saying that to him.
• 17:34
  Yeah.
• 17:34
  Oh, I feel it.
• 17:35
  I feel it.
• 17:35
  I think that's I bring it up as an example because it's like, this is what I've learned in
• 17:40
  this relationship as compared to relationships in my previous husband.
• 17:45
  I was divorced, so I look back at that relationship of like, oh yeah, here's these
• 17:50
  tiny little things that we just make mistakes, and all these little things make it so easy to
• 17:57
  turn them into not a big deal when they actually are.
• 18:00
  They all add up and they all matter, and that's like the biggest thing I feel like I've
• 18:04
  learned.
• 18:05
  Agree.
• 18:06
  And a lot of people, especially in my experience with people and clients I've spoken
• 18:10
  with, like, look, you're not apologizing for something.
• 18:12
  This isn't walking on eggshells.
• 18:14
  This isn't you trying to live a timid life.
• 18:16
  This is you actually living enormously to understand that whenever I make something
• 18:21
  happen, and it clearly impacts someone in a way that I don't love, I'm gonna go back and
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  mention it.
• 18:27
  That is a large soul response.
• 18:30
  I understand this isn't a big deal, and I'm not trying to make a big deal about it.
• 18:34
  It landed this way with me, and I wanted to bring it to your attention that I saw it, I
• 18:38
  felt it, and I don't want to make you feel like that.
• 18:42
  Yeah.
• 18:42
  Yep.
• 18:42
  Exactly.
• 18:43
  All these ways you Yeah. Care
• 18:44
  Care for each
• 18:46
  It's care.
• 18:47
  Yep.
• 18:47
  Yeah.
• 18:49
  So I wanna spend some of our last time today talking about how this applies to desire
• 18:56
  mismatch.
• 18:57
  So one of the things that comes up a lot for couples that is a challenge in the conversation
• 19:03
  and communication world is in their intimate life, and it's real common.
• 19:08
  I I know you know this that it's that people, especially in long term relationships, have
• 19:13
  these mismatched desires where one person wants way more intimate time than another, and this
• 19:20
  can cause so much animosity, and it can cause so much stress, and oftentimes because it's a
• 19:27
  challenging thing for many people to talk about, it's another thing that gets shoved
• 19:31
  under the rug, where like, we tried to talk about it once or twice, and it didn't go well,
• 19:35
  and they got offended, and I got hurt, so we never brought it up again and we've just
• 19:39
  decided that we don't care that much about intimacy anymore.
• 19:43
  And meanwhile, a white person might have accepted that.
• 19:47
  The other person's probably accepted it, and I'm saying that in air quotes, but is secretly
• 19:54
  really brooding about it or maybe is going out and seeking out an affair because they need
• 19:58
  this need to be met, and then we have this real complicated dynamic of where does getting your
• 20:04
  own needs met versus the relationship, it just gets so convoluted and complicated.
• 20:09
  So if somebody has gotten to this point where this has come up to be something that has
• 20:16
  gotten shoved under the rug or maybe it's something else, maybe it's not even desire
• 20:20
  mismatch but it's like, okay, well we really need to talk about this thing, but it's been
• 20:24
  not gone well two or three times before, but it's essential that we have this conversation.
• 20:29
  Do you have any high level advice, and I know this is like, and I say this knowing there are
• 20:35
  so many layers to this, but do you have any high level advice on where we begin to start to
• 20:41
  open up this conversation again?
• 20:43
  Yes.
• 20:45
  It it comes from paying attention to your partner, honestly.
• 20:48
  If we wanna just go like ham fisted crazy generalizations, man wants more touch.
• 20:54
  Understood.
• 20:55
  It it also comes down to woman wants more touch, but not necessarily in a sexual
• 21:00
  intercourse kind of way.
• 21:01
  I want physical intimacy where you touch me in the small of my back and you put your chin on
• 21:06
  the the small of my neck.
• 21:08
  You check over my shoulder to see how things are going in the kitchen while I'm reading my
• 21:12
  book, while I'm on my tablet.
• 21:15
  You do these kinds of things that show an interest in me that still include this intimacy
• 21:21
  that is not necessarily leading directly to sex.
• 21:25
  It shows me that you find me attractive, intriguing.
• 21:30
  You find me interesting, not just for the human animal and the satisfaction that that presents
• 21:37
  and provides, but also as the cerebral, caring, loving, nurturing human being, the other half
• 21:43
  of your soul, your twin flame, if we wanna get into romantic language as well, so that you
• 21:49
  continue to show an interest in their interests, combining it with a piece of
• 21:54
  physical intimacy that says, I am interested in you, and I also still find you so desirable on
• 22:00
  so many levels.
• 22:02
  I operate where you are currently right now with no pressure, and I still provide an
• 22:08
  undertone of that heat, that desire, that I also want.
• 22:13
  I try to mix my red with your blue so that when time comes for purple, we're both so ready for
• 22:20
  it.
• 22:21
  Because I have provided safety without pressure, and you have provided promise without
• 22:27
  guarantee.
• 22:29
  I love that.
• 22:31
  I love that.
• 22:31
  Yeah.
• 22:32
  The promise without guarantee, I think, is a really hard one, but also a really important
• 22:38
  one to to sit with and to just like, oh, like, oh, there can be a promise, and, like, it can
• 22:43
  be a real promise without a guarantee because really really, we can't actually guarantee just
• 22:49
  about anything in life.
• 22:50
  Right?
• 22:51
  There's really almost no guarantee.
• 22:53
  So I think sometimes people don't like the idea of promise because that is confused with
• 22:58
  guarantee, and so sometimes people hesitate to promise because there's that association with
• 23:04
  that when in fact, promise to me means we are gonna show up and really work, you know, do our
• 23:13
  best to help live up to that promise, but life changes.
• 23:16
  We There's unexpected things.
• 23:17
  There's no guarantee just because we promise.
• 23:21
  Agree.
• 23:21
  And and circumstances change.
• 23:24
  It's like we've mentioned several times in both episodes of this.
• 23:26
  You know, what I said in this moment was 100% the gospel honest truth as far as I knew at
• 23:32
  that moment.
• 23:33
  Between then and now, who knows what has transpired?
• 23:37
  I may not have told you what's going on in my mind or my heart, what happened to change my
• 23:42
  trajectory, my expectation of the next whatever time period.
• 23:48
  That's why communication is so clear.
• 23:50
  This comes to a point where we can fight, we can resent, we can assume, or we can just sit
• 23:57
  down and communicate and have something that is not necessarily the most pleasant, but will
• 24:01
  remove doubts and questions that were there before that had no business being there in the
• 24:05
  first place.
• 24:06
  They were something that were conjured.
• 24:08
  They were assumed instead of actually looking to see the truth of the situation and making
• 24:15
  informed decisions knowing those information points.
• 24:20
  Absolutely.
• 24:21
  I couldn't have said it better myself, and thank you, James.
• 24:24
  This has just been absolutely wonderful to spend two episodes with you.
• 24:28
  I wanna make sure that we let people know about your free giveaway as well, so everybody hold
• 24:33
  on a second before you go anywhere because James has a free gift for you.
• 24:37
  So James, if you would tell us about that.
• 24:39
  Of course.
• 24:40
  Thank you, Doctor.
• 24:41
  Diane.
• 24:41
  I have a freebie.
• 24:42
  It's called Sustainable Audacity.
• 24:45
  It's twenty minutes of digging deeper into what it is you want from your life, from your
• 24:49
  career, from your partnerships, from whatever it is.
• 24:52
  So many of us are operating on a system that is an old idea of a dream, because we've had it
• 24:58
  for so long, and we still haven't necessarily reached fruition.
• 25:01
  So what we do is we take a much closer look at what we want and love right now out of life,
• 25:07
  making a much more specific dedication to that desire, and then we build a structure in place
• 25:12
  with small consistent steps to make sure you align your actions and your thoughts with that
• 25:18
  to achieve that new dream and become a more fully realized person that you want to be.
• 25:24
  Beautiful.
• 25:25
  And then that will lead, as we learned in the last episode, that will lead into the option to
• 25:30
  working with James and his coaching programs.
• 25:33
  Anything else to say share about that?
• 25:35
  Just the fact that we always have a really good time.
• 25:38
  It is very aggressively positive.
• 25:40
  That's the thing.
• 25:41
  I want to make sure that anybody who's looking for someone who's gonna be rough on you,
• 25:44
  someone who's going to put the thumb screws to you, that is not at all what we're doing with
• 25:49
  radical joy and sustainable audacity.
• 25:51
  It's about using your joy to find what it is that sets your soul on fire and making a
• 25:57
  sustainable way of keeping it going to make you a happier person, to influence the lives of
• 26:03
  those around you in a more positive way, and to continue making something better out of your
• 26:08
  life.
• 26:10
  Well, wonderful.
• 26:11
  Thank you so much, James and everybody.
• 26:12
  We have tons more stuff like this coming down the pipeline.
• 26:17
  August is gonna be a month full of really looking at how we can improve your
• 26:22
  relationships in so many different ways, so make sure you don't miss any of that.
• 26:26
  Subscribe to the Lounge, share it with your friends, and thank you again for being part of
• 26:31
  the Lounge community, James.
• 26:33
  It has been an absolute pleasure.
• 26:36
  Always a great time talking with you.
• 26:37
  Thank you, Doctor.
• 26:38
  Diane.
• 26:38
  Thanks, everybody.
• 26:39
  Ciao for now.
• 26:43
  Thank you for listening to the Libido Lounge.
• 26:45
  Please don't keep me a secret.
• 26:47
  Please share this with your friends.
• 26:48
  You can find me on YouTube, on Instagram, as well as how to work with me at mylibidodoc.com.