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The Lions Head - Feeling Worthy and Safe Around Loud Personalities · The Hypnotist

• 0:05
  Welcome to The Hypnotist, the show that gives you inside
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  access to cutting edge hypnosis with real clients facing
• 0:12
  genuine. Issues.
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  Brought to you by The Hypnotherapist, demanded by
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  celebrities CE OS and even royalty Adam Cox, these
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  recordings took place live from Evans Clinic in London's world
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  famous Harley Street. So get yourself comfortable and
• 0:31
  enjoy today's episode of The Hypnotist.
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  Have you ever found yourself shrinking and becoming
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  introverted when you're around very loud or arrogant or
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  charismatic personalities? My name is Adam.
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  And on this episode of The Hypnotist, this is what the
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  hypnosis session is all about because I was working with a
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  client that was a very intelligent, very capable
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  person. But they grew up in a family
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  where they had older brothers which were very, very loud and
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  very, very domineering and would sometimes kind of push
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  boundaries just to kind of test the water and establish A
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  hierarchy. And what they found is that that
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  made them feel small and unworthy and not wanted and all
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  of these things that meant that they would kind of clam up a
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  bit. So what you're going to hear in
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  this hypnosis session is a way of them feeling really empowered
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  and confident and also. The ability to.
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  Set boundaries so that if people are disrespectful, rude, or try
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  and make them feel small, they've got a way of responding
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  to that in a non aggressive and a non passive aggressive way to
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  actually establish boundaries. And sometimes the best way to do
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  that is to call it out. So if you think someone is being
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  rude or disrespectful, you know, asking like what do you mean by
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  that is quite a useful way for it you to reflect it back.
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  Because then either they have to kind of joke and and kind of
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  pass it off as nothing, in which case you've established the
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  boundary, or they need to double down and kind of actually be
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  rude. But at least they now know what
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  they're doing and you now know what they're doing, and then you
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  can act accordingly. But that's not the main part of
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  this. The main part of this is feeling
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  empowered to really be yourself. And there is a metaphor.
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  Here of. Peacocks and goats, and that is
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  that sometimes people that are, let's say, more introverted or
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  more quiet in nature, and I would put myself in that camp.
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  I am definitely a natural introvert.
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  You know, in my teenage years I was incredibly shy and therefore
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  it wasn't my nature to kind of be loud.
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  So therefore when I'm around very loud people, you know, at
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  least in the past I would compare myself with those people
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  and sometimes get frustrated and sometimes feel, you know, why
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  can't I be like that now? The client also had that kind of
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  feeling, but in the present, whereas that was my past.
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  And I said, which animal do you feel is the most attention
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  seeking loud kind of animal? And for them.
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  The idea of Peacocks kind of came up and I said what is quite
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  a a quiet, humble kind of animal that doesn't really care what
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  anyone else is up to. And for them the idea of a goat
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  came up. So you're going to hear those
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  references of goats and Peacocks to highlight that if someone
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  else is doing something that would be aligned with either an
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  extroverted personality or even attention seeking behavior based
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  on their own past, that's fine. That's them and that doesn't
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  need to be you. So if you have found yourself
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  feeling a bit quiet or insignificant or small in these
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  situations, then you really might get some value from this
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  session. Obviously it was created for an
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  individual. Some of the suggestions would
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  have been perfect for them and not quite right for you.
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  So on that basis, if you do like the idea of a bespoke session
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  tailored entirely for you and to work with me directly, have a
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  look in the show notes in the description where you will find
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  a link to book a free consultation call.
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  We'll have a chat and maybe rather than just you listening
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  to me on YouTube or on a podcast, we actually end up
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  working together. And that's how most of my
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  clients find me. They listen to this sometimes a
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  long time. I've had clients listen to me
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  for a year or two and they keep. Hearing me say.
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  Look, book a consultation call, we'll have a chat.
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  And they think, right, other people can do that, but I'm not
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  going to do that. But why not book that
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  consultation call? We'll have a chat, and it might
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  be that we actually work together live, rather than just
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  you listening to my recordings. For now, though, find a quiet,
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  comfortable place where you're not going to be disturbed.
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  Relax and enjoy the session. Take a deep breath in, and as
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  you breathe in, breathe in that resourceful feeling of calm and
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  relaxation. And as you exhale, feel a
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  wonderful sense of release, as if any tension, stress or
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  worries are feeling like they're leaving your body in your
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  outward breath, breathing in, then resourceful relaxation.
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  And that's it. Feeling your eyelids getting
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  heavier, your jaw loosening. And as you exhale, just feel
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  that release, like you're letting go.
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  That's it. And I want you to imagine a
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  colour that represents self acceptance and maybe it's a
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  bright colour, a distinctive colour.
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  And just imagine as you breathe in, you're breathing in pure
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  distilled self acceptance and as you exhale, feel that you are
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  releasing any insecurities or unworthiness in your outward
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  breath. And maybe you could imagine that
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  releasing any of those things that feel unsafe or undesirable.
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  That's it. I want you to scan your face for
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  any clues of tension, maybe around your eyelids or your
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  forehead, your jaw, around your cheeks.
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  And as you breathe in that self acceptance, allow it to melt
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  away tension there in the forehead and just feel that
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  release. Each breath takes you deeper and
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  deeper, relaxed. That's it.
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  And as your physical body relaxes, your imagination
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  awakens. And I want you to imagine a
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  mountain that resembles a lion's head.
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  And I want you to imagine that you are there, at the foot of
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  this mountain. Imagine wearing clothing
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  suitable for a hike. And maybe you can imagine blue
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  skies, sunshine, and just imagine what it would feel like
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  to start the ascent. Imagine breathing in that air,
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  feeling the warmth, and step after step feel what it would
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  feel like to climb this mountain.
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  Each step takes you deeper and deeper, relaxed, as if somehow
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  this mountain is a portal to that part of your mind that is
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  able to discard old definitions, unuseful beliefs, and to
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  consider new ways of thinking, feeling and being.
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  So as you breathe in that self acceptance and release any
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  unworthiness, continue to imagine walking up that
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  mountain. And about halfway up the
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  mountain, I want you to see something strange.
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  I want you to imagine seeing at least three Peacocks.
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  And I want you to see the movement they make, that
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  posturing, fanning their feathers, and maybe they're
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  wailing or crowing. And I want you to get a sense
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  that this is a cry for attention.
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  But you can't blame the Peacocks for fanning their feathers or
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  wailing the way they do. That's what Peacocks do.
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  And I want you to feel complete acceptance for the Peacocks.
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  And then I want you to see somewhere near the Peacocks is a
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  little goat, and I want you to see that little goat with
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  nothing to prove. And while the Peacocks are
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  wailing and fanning their feathers, the goat is happy just
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  being a goat. Doesn't need to bleat.
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  Doesn't need to strut the goat as rock solid.
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  Confidence in being a goat. In fact, I want you to imagine
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  seeing the goat climb up a bit of a Ridge halfway up this
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  mountain, and I want you to see it sure, footed, rock solid, and
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  see it standing on a boulder. Not to show off, not to get
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  attention just because it can. The goat doesn't mind the
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  attention, but it doesn't need it.
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  It's happy if the Peacocks or anyone else noticed the goat,
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  but equally, even if the goat is unseen, the goat is completely
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  comfortable because the goat doesn't change how it feels
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  depending on who else is around. And I want you to feel an
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  affinity with that goat. And when the goat sees the
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  Peacocks strutting, fanning their feathers and wailing, the
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  goat has full acceptance. What the goat doesn't try and do
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  is to become a Peacock. The goat takes pride in being a
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  goat. And as you continue up the
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  mountain, I want you to feel that that same level of self
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  acceptance. You like who you are, you
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  respect who you are, and you value who you are, and therefore
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  anyone else's reaction, attention, words or expressions
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  are simply a reflection of them, not a reflection of you.
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  As you continue up the mountain, I want you to imagine how it
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  would feel to get to the pinnacle, the summit.
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  And I want you to imagine looking out, perhaps over an
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  entire town, and just feel. Feel that you're in the right
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  place emotionally. You like who you are.
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  You feel comfortable in that moment, in your body, the way
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  you're living your life. And let's imagine what it would
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  feel like to have a comfortable chair there at the top of that
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  Lion's Head mountain. Maybe you could imagine a soft,
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  comfortable reclining chair that still has that view.
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  And I want you to get a feeling of what it would feel like to
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  sit in that chair and sink into it.
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  Allow your whole body weight to sink into that chair feeling
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  more and more relaxed. And as I countdown from 5 to 1,
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  you will imagine what it would feel like to feel so relaxed in
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  that chair that you drift off into a dream like sleep. 5, your
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  eyelids getting heavier and four, all the muscles around
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  your neck and shoulder just melt away any tension.
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  And then three, your arms just feel limp and loose.
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  And then two, even your internal organs relax.
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  Lungs, heart, stomach, all the way into the gut, relax.
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  Any tension is leaving your body in your outward breath.
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  And then one, just imagine how good it would feel for your legs
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  to feel limp, loose and heavy, so your whole body is relaxed as
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  you sink deeper into a dreamlike sleep.
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  And I want you to imagine that in that dream, you're able to
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  visit a moment. A moment from your past where
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  you felt rock solid self assurance even around other
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  people, comfortable in your own skin, proud of who you are,
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  oozing worthiness in a calm feeling.
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  And just imagine seeing that version of you in whichever
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  context you were in. And just observe.
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  I want you to breathe the way that version of you is
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  breathing, to have a similar posture or facial expression as
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  you know that that version of you wouldn't change that feeling
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  of worthiness no matter who else is around.
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  And I want you to imagine seeing a glowing circle underneath the
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  feet for that version of you oozing worthiness.
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  And then imagine a cylindrical beam floating up from that
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  circle. So now you're seeing yourself
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  standing in the middle of a cylinder of golden light with a
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  glowing circle beneath your feet.
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  And we can call this the Golden Circle of Worthiness.
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  And as an observer, you can see that that version of you has a
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  particular definition of what it means to be worthy.
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  That version of you has come to the conclusion that if you are
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  meeting or exceeding your standards of living in terms of
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  how you live, then you are worthy.
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  This isn't doing what's possible.
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  This is doing more than the bare minimum.
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  And if that version of you is meeting that standard, then
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  you're worthy. But also, I want you to notice
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  that in that moment, that version of you was living in
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  alignment with your values. If that version of you valued
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  adventure, you're on an adventure, that version of you
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  values authenticity, then you are authentic.
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  If that version of you values kindness, see yourself being
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  kind, and if your unconscious agree, it's that that's all it
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  takes for you to feel worthy to meet your minimum standards, to
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  be in alignment with your values.
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  Let me know by nodding your head and then step into that version
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  of you and feel what it would feel like to feel 100% worthy,
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  100% good enough, more than good enough.
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  And I want you to feel that feeling and scan your body for
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  where you feel that feeling of worthiness.
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  Because sometimes people feel anxiety in the gut or stress in
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  the jaw or the temple. But I want you to scan your body
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  for where you feel that worthiness that you are valuable
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  as you are, and just point to that location of where that
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  worthiness feels like it is. And I want you to imagine a
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  shape there in that location, A3 dimensional shape.
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  It doesn't have to be a cube or a pyramid, could be a crown, it
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  could be something else, an object that for you represents
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  worthiness. Just imagine it in that location
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  in a particular colour and then notice if it moves, rotates,
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  pulsates and whatever it does, speed it up until you increase
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  and amplify the worthiness. Give it a colour and make the
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  colour glow until you find the optimal level of worthiness.
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  Then give it a sound, a sound of worthiness.
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  And that might be a phrase like I am more than enough, I am
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  valuable. Or it could just be a sound like
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  a shimmer or a vibration or something else.
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  And I want you to feel what it feels like to have that level of
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  worthiness and realize that when you feel worthy like this, you
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  feel calm, you feel secure, you feel completely self assured.
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  But also notice how safe you feel.
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  And you feel safe because in this moment, you know that
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  someone understands, someone cares, someone values you, and
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  someone accepts you. And if that's all it takes, even
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  if that person is you, for you to feel emotionally safe, let me
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  know by nodding your head. And I want you to feel that
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  because you feel worthy and emotionally safe.
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  If anyone is being deliberately or maliciously disrespectful,
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  rude, that same worthiness will make you feel empowered to have
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  a boundary to ask a question, even if that question is what
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  did you mean by that? And that question alone will
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  diffuse more than 90% of rudeness, disrespect and power
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  plays. Because sometimes people are
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  trying to find chinks in the armour or just stir the pot.
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  But when you call it out, you hold a mirror to their behaviour
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  and if they sidestep it, deflect, you win.
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  If they try and pass it off as a joke, you win because you've
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  established the boundary of what you will not tolerate.
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  And if they persist and double down and then are maliciously
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  rude or disrespectful, you have the autonomy to take yourself
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  out of that situation. You can leave, and if it feels
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  that you are empowered to call out anything that is a conscious
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  or unconscious attempt to make you feel less than, let me know
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  by nodding your head. That's it.
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  And I want you to imagine the situation in the past where
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  someone did do that and just imagine feeling calm, secure and
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  worthy and asking them confidently what do you mean by
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  that? And imagine their response.
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  And you can have it in a curious, confident, assertive
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  tone and realise if you can do it, then you can do it at any
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  point in the future. So breathe in that feeling of
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  confidence and go back to seeing that version of you in that
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  cylinder of light and imagine a social situation with a group of
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  friends. But see yourself like you're
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  someone else. But see yourself in that
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  cylinder of golden light with that glowing shape there in your
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  chest. And I want you to see that that
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  version of you is safe, secure, calm and worthy and enjoys
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  sharing any information you choose to share.
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  And you can be interested, confident, and you don't have to
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  embellish a story. The truth and real life is all
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  you need. And if you could imagine that
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  version of you confidently, securely, safely, comfortably
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  sharing whatever you want to share, let me know by nodding
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  your head. That's it.
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  And then step into that version of you and feel that in the same
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  way that if one candle lights another candle, the light of the
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  first candle is not diminished. You sharing your stories, your
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  experiences does not take away from anyone else's.
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  And I want you to feel how that feels, to feel that you can
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  express yourself as you choose to.
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  And then imagine leaving that environment, feeling that you've
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  expanded your comfort zone. And then imagine seeing
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  yourself, perhaps in a family meal, but imagine seeing that
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  version of you with that glowing shape in your chest, bathed in
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  that cylinder of light, a golden circle beneath your feet.
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  And that version of you, perhaps, is a goat among
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  Peacocks. No need to compete with
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  Peacocks. That's not you.
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  And I want you to see how comfortable, secure, and
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  emotionally safe you seem. And if Peacocks do what Peacocks
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  do, you accept it. And if there is a deliberate
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  attempt to be rude or disrespectful, you call it out.
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  I want you to get a feeling that that version of you does not
• 29:16
  make yourself smaller. You're proud of who you are.
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  You own all of your qualities, and that version of you is
• 29:28
  worthy not because of other people, but because of your
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  standards and your values. And if you can see that version
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  of you perhaps even thriving in that situation that once felt
• 29:49
  uncomfortable, let me know by nodding your head and then
• 29:53
  rewind it. Step into that.
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  So now you feel what it would feel like to be in that
• 29:58
  situation. Feel that sensation in your
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  chest, the sound, the movement, the colour.
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  Imagine looking at your feet, seeing that golden circle,
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  feeling bathed in that golden light.
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  And I want you to imagine this is now training at altitude.
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  Imagine the worst possible cocktail of situations and yet
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  you remain unfazed, unbothered. But anything malicious or
• 30:33
  deliberate, you feel empowered to challenge it, to call it out.
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  You are holding your ground, establishing A boundary, letting
• 30:49
  people know what's OK and what's not OK, because many people
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  believe that you get what you deserve and it's not true.
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  You get what you tolerate, and this worthy, confident version
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  of you is not willing to tolerate disrespect or rudeness,
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  but it is willing to tolerate Peacocks being Peacocks because
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  that's what they do. And if this feels like the right
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  balance of acceptance and control, that's it.
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  Let me know by nodding your head.
• 31:32
  And I want you to feel that this also expands the comfort zone
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  and before long situations used to avoid you feel like you
• 31:44
  actively want to engage with to build more resilience,
• 31:51
  confidence and a sense of rock solid self assurance.
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  Imagine it's the end of that meal and you leave feeling proud
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  of yourself by not shrinking but holding your space, respecting
• 32:13
  who you are in the way you are. And then imagine floating back
• 32:19
  to that mountaintop, but as you leave the chair to look over the
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  town, the views, the panoramic, I want you to feel that
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  something has shifted. What you're willing to tolerate
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  has shifted. The definitions of worthiness
• 32:41
  have shifted. What it takes to feel safe has
• 32:45
  shifted. And in doing so, you are
• 32:49
  rippling through space and time, but will subtly or not so
• 32:54
  subtly, change how you feel, how you think, and how you feel in
• 33:01
  different situations. And with that in mind, it's time
• 33:06
  to float all the way back to your present, the here and the
• 33:12
  now. So take a deep breath in through
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  your nose and out through your nose.
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  Wiggle your fingers and wiggle your toes.
• 33:22
  Connect and calibrate into the here and the now.
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  And as I count from 1:00 to 10:00, you will awaken feeling
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  worthy, secure, emotionally safe, and excited for the
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  future. Starting to count 123 Waking up
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  456. More alert 7-8 Open your eyes.
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  Open your eyes 910. Wide awake, Wide awake.
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  Wide awake. Thank you so much for joining me
• 34:01
  on today's episode. Of the hypnotist and if you've
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  enjoyed this. Show or got?
• 34:06
  Some benefit from it, you may know.
• 34:09
  Of one other. Friend or family?
• 34:12
  Member that may also benefit from this hypnosis session.
• 34:16
  In which case I'd like to ask. A favor of you, and that is if
• 34:20
  you could spend 10 seconds. To share this episode with.
• 34:24
  Someone that you know that may also benefit.
• 34:27
  That would. Really help me to access new
• 34:30
  people that don't already know about this show You very much
• 34:34
  for listening and I will see you again on the next episode.