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"We want prenup! We want prenup!" (Yeah!) · She's On The Money

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: She's on the Money.
• 0:02
  Speaker 2: She's on the Money.
• 0:12
  Speaker 3: Hello, and welcome to She Is on the Money, the
• 0:15
  Speaker 3: podcast Millennials to Want Financial Freedom. My name is Georgia King.
• 0:18
  Speaker 3: I'm a copywriter and journalism student who has all us
• 0:21
  Speaker 3: left to learn when it comes to money, and thankfully
• 0:23
  Speaker 3: here to help me out as always is financial advisor
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: Victoria devine V.
• 0:27
  Speaker 4: Hello, hello friend.
• 0:28
  Speaker 3: Now today on the show, we are going to be
• 0:30
  Speaker 3: tackling quite a big one. That is, what is the
• 0:32
  Speaker 3: real cost of divorce?
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: Now?
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: It's estimated that in Australia, roughly fifty thousand divorces occur
• 0:38
  Speaker 3: each year, and that, perhaps unsurprisingly, women are usually more
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: likely to come out of the split worse than men. Now,
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: divorces are also not as simple as calling it a day,
• 0:46
  Speaker 3: going to separate ways. Oursets need to be divided, kids
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: need to be considered, and the whole process can end
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: up being significantly more expensive than you may think. But
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: before we talk through this big old topic and not
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: out how we can set ourselves up for as financially
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: positive a divorce as possible, Victoria, let's start on a
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: happier note, or maybe it's not happy. Talk me through
• 1:06
  Speaker 3: your money wins or confessions from this week time.
• 1:07
  Speaker 4: Jod it's not a happier note. I have a confession
• 1:09
  Speaker 4: this week to share with you.
• 1:11
  Speaker 5: What have you done?
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: So?
• 1:13
  Speaker 4: I think I loaded on the podcast very recently that
• 1:16
  Speaker 4: I had a money win because I didn't have to
• 1:18
  Speaker 4: pay for my parking in the CBT. Yeah, but I
• 1:20
  Speaker 4: didn't knock on wood when we are recorded that. So
• 1:24
  Speaker 4: I actually have ended up with a parking fine for
• 1:27
  Speaker 4: parking in a spot for too long. And it turns
• 1:30
  Speaker 4: out that that is one hundred and twenty dollars fine
• 1:33
  Speaker 4: here in the Melbourne cbd D.
• 1:35
  Speaker 5: So yeah, a bit steep, bit of a sting past.
• 1:38
  Speaker 3: So that should not be a thing right now. I
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: don't think.
• 1:41
  Speaker 4: No, it's a bit rude because again I was at
• 1:43
  Speaker 4: work exactly, but I think that, you know, maybe.
• 1:46
  Speaker 5: That was deserved because I should have kept.
• 1:48
  Speaker 4: An eye on my parking time a little bit more.
• 1:51
  Speaker 5: True, more closely.
• 1:52
  Speaker 4: But that that is what it is. If you've got
• 1:54
  Speaker 4: a money win or confession for me, please win.
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: I've got a win to make up for yours, although
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: it is kind of set.
• 2:00
  Speaker 4: So I feel like our money when dank confessions are
• 2:03
  Speaker 4: getting sad and we are grasping its straws, but I'm here.
• 2:06
  Speaker 5: It's time I got a parking ticket. What if you
• 2:08
  Speaker 5: done so a couple of.
• 2:09
  Speaker 3: Weeks ago, back in the days when you could go
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: to cafes and sit in them for that limited time
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: period in Melbournis.
• 2:16
  Speaker 5: I remember those days from play.
• 2:18
  Speaker 3: Yes, So I went to a cafe with a girlfriend.
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: We waited for an hour for a seat at a
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: table because it was so novel, you know, we hadn't
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: done that in a long.
• 2:26
  Speaker 5: Time, that's crazy.
• 2:27
  Speaker 3: We waited, it was fine. We sat down, you know,
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: chattered for a little bit, decided what we were going
• 2:32
  Speaker 3: to order. I went up. It was going to be
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: my shout. I didn't tell Aaron that my friend, but
• 2:36
  Speaker 3: it was going to be girl anyway, ordered went to pay.
• 2:40
  Speaker 3: Only had cash on me because I lost my bank
• 2:42
  Speaker 3: card like like thought, I blocked it and everything, it's all.
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: Jake went back to Aaron, said, girl, can I borrow
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: your card? They did not taking cash at the moment,
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: COVID life, and she was like, I only have cash.
• 2:53
  Speaker 3: So we had to leave there without our fifty dollar breakfast, coffee, taie,
• 2:59
  Speaker 3: all of the things. So it was kind of waste.
• 3:01
  Speaker 3: Breakfast at home yeah, I did, so that's kind of
• 3:04
  Speaker 3: where the wind ties into it. It was a waste of
• 3:06
  Speaker 3: a morning. I mean, I still got to hang out
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: with Aaron.
• 3:08
  Speaker 5: Love you dull, but you're a top blowcairy.
• 3:11
  Speaker 3: She goes, all right, but yeah, I didn't didn't pay
• 3:14
  Speaker 3: for my breakfast or for hers, so fifty dollars in
• 3:16
  Speaker 3: my bank account that I wouldn't have had.
• 3:18
  Speaker 5: So good. That's kind of a sucky cod story. But
• 3:23
  Speaker 5: that's all right.
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: Let's let's turn our attention to our brilliant Facebook community. Yes,
• 3:28
  Speaker 3: get involved if you're not already a member. Victoria, do
• 3:31
  Speaker 3: you have a favorite post from this week?
• 3:33
  Speaker 4: I do. I have one from Ashley and she said
• 3:36
  Speaker 4: that she has a money win for us, right love that.
• 3:39
  Speaker 4: She said that she's getting married in October, and then
• 3:42
  Speaker 4: in brackets she said hopefully with the fingers Press. But
• 3:45
  Speaker 4: she said so, there's a very variouslim portion of her
• 3:47
  Speaker 4: budget allocated to buying clothes or nice treats for herself,
• 3:51
  Speaker 4: and she was desperate for a new winter dress and
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: a few nice pieces to spruce up her wardrobe. And
• 3:56
  Speaker 4: she went to the up shop last week spent a
• 3:58
  Speaker 4: total of sixty dollars on five different items, three of
• 4:01
  Speaker 4: which were brand new tags still on, and two of
• 4:05
  Speaker 4: them were from higher end designer brands like Peter Alexander
• 4:07
  Speaker 4: and Trent Nathan. She said she added it up and
• 4:10
  Speaker 4: to buy these clothes in Soare it would have cost
• 4:12
  Speaker 4: her more than two hundred and fifty dollars, which is
• 4:14
  Speaker 4: a massive saving. Each saved one hundred and ninety dollars.
• 4:17
  Speaker 4: She says she's feeling very proud of herself for not
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: only snagging a total bargain, but investing in more sustainable
• 4:22
  Speaker 4: fashion options. And she said that she has actually had
• 4:25
  Speaker 4: so many compliments on her new outfits already, which I love,
• 4:28
  Speaker 4: and I think that that is just really inspirational given
• 4:31
  Speaker 4: our fast fashion very recently.
• 4:33
  Speaker 5: Georgia, good one.
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: You, Ashley loved that.
• 4:36
  Speaker 5: What have you got for us, Georgia?
• 4:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so mine it's not a win, but it was
• 4:39
  Speaker 3: a very cute post that I saw today. So it's
• 4:42
  Speaker 3: from Chloe. She's written in Hi guys new to this group.
• 4:45
  Speaker 5: I thought I would share.
• 4:46
  Speaker 3: She's actually printed out a money saving tree.
• 4:50
  Speaker 5: Oh I saw these.
• 4:51
  Speaker 3: It it's a literal tree and each leaf represents fifty dollars,
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: so she colors them in each time she pops.
• 4:57
  Speaker 4: To us into a holiday savings account.
• 4:59
  Speaker 5: It's right.
• 5:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so the whole tree with all its leaves amounts
• 5:03
  Speaker 3: to ten thousand dollars, which I think is two hundred
• 5:05
  Speaker 3: livus math. So yeah, that was just really cute, A
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: nice little idea. It's for a trip to Europe. Hopefully
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: that'll happen one day.
• 5:12
  Speaker 4: I wonder if we can get that printable in the
• 5:13
  Speaker 4: Facebook group. Yeah, I think there could be a thing.
• 5:16
  Speaker 4: I'm going to get in touch with Chloe. I'm going
• 5:18
  Speaker 4: to get in touch with Chloe. Chloe, I'm coming for
• 5:20
  Speaker 4: you and your tree.
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: Look out. Alrighty, now it is on to the main
• 5:24
  Speaker 3: topic of today's show, What is the real cost of
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: a divorce? Now we've spoken about engagement rings and weddings
• 5:29
  Speaker 3: on the show before, but we're yet to have explored
• 5:32
  Speaker 3: the financial impacts of divorce, or, as it is technically known,
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: the formal legal ending of marriage, which guys probably already knew,
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: but I thought I throw it in there now. Given
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: that one in three marriages in Australia does actually end,
• 5:42
  Speaker 3: and that women are often left financially worse off from
• 5:45
  Speaker 3: divorce than men, we think this topic is absolutely worthy
• 5:48
  Speaker 3: of conversation, even if divorce may seem a foreign concept
• 5:51
  Speaker 3: for our younger listeners or a far off concept for
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: people that are loved up. So to start us off, Victoria,
• 5:57
  Speaker 3: can you please give us an idea of what is
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: actually involved when it comes to divorce and why it
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: can be so expensive.
• 6:01
  Speaker 4: Yes, so I'm glad we chose such a light topic
• 6:04
  Speaker 4: for today's show, but let's be honest, it is actually
• 6:06
  Speaker 4: one that is incredibly important because, as I always say,
• 6:10
  Speaker 4: like we just need to be educated. You don't have
• 6:12
  Speaker 4: to be in a position where you're even thinking about
• 6:14
  Speaker 4: a divorce to know what you need to know if
• 6:17
  Speaker 4: you were ever in that position, or what you need
• 6:19
  Speaker 4: to know to hold a hand of a friend who's
• 6:21
  Speaker 4: potentially going through that situation. So divorce does impact individuals
• 6:26
  Speaker 4: in super substantial ways financially, and so this is why
• 6:30
  Speaker 4: we are talking about this today, So Georgia. It also
• 6:33
  Speaker 4: directly affects more than one hundred thousand Australians each and
• 6:35
  Speaker 4: every single year, so it is not an uncommon thing
• 6:38
  Speaker 4: for people to be going through. Obviously, every single divorce
• 6:41
  Speaker 4: will vary and the financial ramifications of it for everyone
• 6:44
  Speaker 4: will alter. But today I really want to provide the
• 6:48
  Speaker 4: top line info of what we need to be looking
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: out for and how we can put ourselves first, especially
• 6:54
  Speaker 4: because most of our listeners, Georgia are actually women. So
• 6:58
  Speaker 4: to kick us off, also really cool quickly about an
• 7:00
  Speaker 4: amicable divorce which is settled out of court via mediation
• 7:04
  Speaker 4: and it all runs pretty smoothly. So Georgia and amicable
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: divorce is when both parties are in agreeance, they kind
• 7:09
  Speaker 4: of come to the table and say, hey, do you
• 7:10
  Speaker 4: want a divorce In the other parties as yeah, so
• 7:12
  Speaker 4: glad last I'm here for that too, and they actually
• 7:15
  Speaker 4: separate in a way that has no conflict involved in
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: it at all. So you're, you know, still friends, or
• 7:21
  Speaker 4: you're maybe not friends, but you're still okay with each
• 7:24
  Speaker 4: other and you just want the relationship over. You're happy
• 7:27
  Speaker 4: to negotiate on things like property or houses or even
• 7:30
  Speaker 4: if you don't have kids. Just come to a conclusion
• 7:33
  Speaker 4: around what that means. So whilst you might think that
• 7:36
  Speaker 4: that's the cheap way out of it, Georgia, Fidan chev Kat,
• 7:39
  Speaker 4: who also spoke to Finder recently, has said that these
• 7:42
  Speaker 4: were cost around five to eight thousand dollars and that's
• 7:46
  Speaker 4: because there's no divorce lawyers involved, and it would be
• 7:49
  Speaker 4: relatively painless. This is actually the scenario that most Australian
• 7:53
  Speaker 4: families go through, and it is only a small percentage
• 7:56
  Speaker 4: of divorces that go to court. So I do really
• 7:58
  Speaker 4: want to call that out on because we're not talking
• 8:01
  Speaker 4: about every single divorce that happens, because more often than not,
• 8:04
  Speaker 4: when you decide to get a divorce, you might not
• 8:06
  Speaker 4: be happy with the other person or something has happened,
• 8:09
  Speaker 4: but you usually come to some level of agreement between
• 8:12
  Speaker 4: the two parties so that you can actually just settle
• 8:15
  Speaker 4: things and go okay, well we've argued about it, but
• 8:17
  Speaker 4: now here's the outcome. It's often a very small amount
• 8:21
  Speaker 4: of people who end up in court or end up
• 8:23
  Speaker 4: stringing divorces out for numbers of years, which you know,
• 8:27
  Speaker 4: some large expenses obviously come into play there. So also
• 8:30
  Speaker 4: according to TVA Law in Australia, we can expect divorces
• 8:34
  Speaker 4: to on average cost us between fifteen to twenty thousand dollars,
• 8:39
  Speaker 4: which is according to them, quite reasonable. I don't know
• 8:43
  Speaker 4: how I feel about that, Georgia.
• 8:45
  Speaker 5: That's sensitive variety, Yeah, exactly.
• 8:47
  Speaker 4: And this cost actually covers the initial negotiations, initiating court
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: proceedings AFFI David's lawyer costs and mediation and court biling
• 8:56
  Speaker 4: fees and everything that's associated with that. So unfortunately, this
• 9:00
  Speaker 4: can absolutely skyrocket if things aren't amicable between both parties.
• 9:05
  Speaker 4: So if you're in disagreement about who gets the kids,
• 9:07
  Speaker 4: or who gets the dog, or you know, who gets
• 9:09
  Speaker 4: what house, or you know, even if it's just some
• 9:12
  Speaker 4: savings that you're fighting over, this can absolutely skyrocket the
• 9:16
  Speaker 4: second you get any lawyer involved. Because Georgia, on average,
• 9:19
  Speaker 4: a lawyer costs hundreds of dollars per hour to engage.
• 9:23
  Speaker 4: So this is the basis of the court system fees
• 9:26
  Speaker 4: if you go down that road for divorce. So I
• 9:28
  Speaker 4: think that it's important to just be aware. We're not
• 9:30
  Speaker 4: just saying, oh, take it, take them to court. We're saying, okay, well,
• 9:34
  Speaker 4: that's actually a really big financial undertaking for both parties. However,
• 9:39
  Speaker 4: the financial impacts of divorce go far beyond just the
• 9:42
  Speaker 4: divorce itself, and there are lots of elements we need
• 9:44
  Speaker 4: to discuss and consider and actually take into consideration.
• 9:48
  Speaker 3: Tell me a little bit more about processing.
• 9:49
  Speaker 4: So Georgia, the main financial impact we actually need to
• 9:52
  Speaker 4: be really weary of when it comes to divorce, is
• 9:54
  Speaker 4: that the whole process can quite dramatically reduce our savings
• 9:58
  Speaker 4: and our assets. It can actually with our superannuation. It
• 10:01
  Speaker 4: can impact our ability to afford a home once the
• 10:04
  Speaker 4: divorce has actually settled, which is quite scary if we
• 10:07
  Speaker 4: think about it. Then there are so many other personal
• 10:10
  Speaker 4: costs that we will touch on too in this conversation,
• 10:13
  Speaker 4: like the cost of therapy if it's required. Like, let's
• 10:16
  Speaker 4: be honest, if you have been living with somebody regardless
• 10:19
  Speaker 4: of how amicable your divorce is, I think it's a
• 10:21
  Speaker 4: really great idea to go and see someone and talk
• 10:24
  Speaker 4: that through because regardless of what you say or how
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: amicable it is, that is a traumatic situation that you
• 10:30
  Speaker 4: are going through, no matter how amicable it is. And
• 10:34
  Speaker 4: I think that that's really important to point out. And
• 10:36
  Speaker 4: I also think it's a really strong thing for you
• 10:38
  Speaker 4: to do. And that's a complete side note, but I
• 10:40
  Speaker 4: do think it's really important to talk about that because
• 10:43
  Speaker 4: there are so many other costs associated with the divorce
• 10:46
  Speaker 4: that aren't just like okay, well i lost half my
• 10:48
  Speaker 4: savings because my partner took it. So other things like
• 10:51
  Speaker 4: spousal support that could exist. So spousal support is where
• 10:55
  Speaker 4: you have to pay your partner some money so that
• 10:57
  Speaker 4: they can live their life because they got used to
• 11:00
  Speaker 4: a certain type of lifestyle or they're unable to support
• 11:03
  Speaker 4: themselves immediately after a breakup. And for some people that
• 11:06
  Speaker 4: can last for a really long time, or that can
• 11:09
  Speaker 4: last for a really short period of time until they
• 11:11
  Speaker 4: get back on their feet. And there's other things like
• 11:13
  Speaker 4: child support that you would have to pay as well
• 11:15
  Speaker 4: if you are separating with a partner and have children involved.
• 11:17
  Speaker 4: It's generally cheaper to live as a duo than a solo,
• 11:21
  Speaker 4: and this is why generally, as young people we have
• 11:24
  Speaker 4: housemates and we live with other people and sometimes we
• 11:27
  Speaker 4: share the bills and foot the rent together. Like, I
• 11:30
  Speaker 4: think it's really important to take that into consideration that
• 11:33
  Speaker 4: when you get a divorce, life usually gets a bit
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: more expensive and more often than not, if you're getting
• 11:39
  Speaker 4: a divorce, you aren't in the mind frame where having
• 11:42
  Speaker 4: housemate is normal to you. Having a housemate might be
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: something that you go no victoria, like I'm not going
• 11:47
  Speaker 4: to go get a housemate because I've lived on my
• 11:50
  Speaker 4: own or I've lived with my partner for the last
• 11:51
  Speaker 4: five ten years. I can't do it. I need to
• 11:54
  Speaker 4: just get my own space. So more often than not,
• 11:57
  Speaker 4: your cost of living increases once you divorce as an individual.
• 12:01
  Speaker 4: So we're not saying it's going to be like double,
• 12:03
  Speaker 4: but as a solo person, you are going to be
• 12:06
  Speaker 4: spending a little bit more money. You guys already know
• 12:09
  Speaker 4: how passionate I am about future you and making sure
• 12:11
  Speaker 4: that they are put in the best possible position. So
• 12:14
  Speaker 4: I think it's really important to note that according to
• 12:16
  Speaker 4: a recent Australian study, superannuation balances are significantly lower for
• 12:21
  Speaker 4: divorced parents than they are for their married counterparts, and
• 12:25
  Speaker 4: the stat is that divorced mothers have sixty eight percent
• 12:29
  Speaker 4: less super than married moms and similarly divorced fathers between
• 12:34
  Speaker 4: the ages of forty five and sixty four. According to
• 12:36
  Speaker 4: this study, Georgia have sixty percent less super than married
• 12:39
  Speaker 4: dads five years after their relationships have ended. Why is
• 12:43
  Speaker 4: that just because it's split. It could be split, It
• 12:46
  Speaker 4: could be so many different things. I think it's really
• 12:49
  Speaker 4: important to note that more often than not, if you're
• 12:52
  Speaker 4: a single mum and you've been divorced, you've probably gone
• 12:56
  Speaker 4: through a very large period of your life where you
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: are not generating an incoming contributing to your super and
• 13:01
  Speaker 4: I think that's then a completely different podcast topic that
• 13:05
  Speaker 4: I really want to discuss as well, and that should
• 13:08
  Speaker 4: your partner ever contribute to your superannuation, which is crazy
• 13:12
  Speaker 4: to think about, but also makes a lot of sense
• 13:14
  Speaker 4: if you are both working towards financial freedom and being
• 13:18
  Speaker 4: equitable and being on the same page. So I think
• 13:21
  Speaker 4: it's just really interesting to know these stats and be
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: educated about what's going on. I also think it's really
• 13:27
  Speaker 4: important to note in every state in Australia, superannuation is
• 13:33
  Speaker 4: seen as a joint asset, except for in do WA,
• 13:35
  Speaker 4: where if you get a to force and your partner
• 13:38
  Speaker 4: has three hundred thousand dollars in their superannuation account and
• 13:42
  Speaker 4: you are leaving them and you know whatever is going on,
• 13:45
  Speaker 4: you don't actually have access to that. And that is
• 13:48
  Speaker 4: one thing that terrifies me because you guys have been
• 13:51
  Speaker 4: working together and a relationship. In my eyes, and this
• 13:55
  Speaker 4: is very personal opinion. Now, relationship in my eyes is
• 13:58
  Speaker 4: about partnership. And if you are a stay at home mum,
• 14:02
  Speaker 4: you are doing so much work. You just don't have
• 14:05
  Speaker 4: a salary for it, Yeah, and I think that you
• 14:08
  Speaker 4: are absolutely well and truly contributing, so for then the
• 14:11
  Speaker 4: relationship to to dissolve and the other party be significantly
• 14:14
  Speaker 4: financially benefited. But you being disadvantaged is just not fair.
• 14:20
  Speaker 4: So I think that we need to start talking about this.
• 14:22
  Speaker 4: And I think that that's a really important stat to know,
• 14:25
  Speaker 4: because you might just assume that it's an asset that
• 14:28
  Speaker 4: you know, if we get a divorce, you'll be able
• 14:30
  Speaker 4: to access, whereas if you live in WA that's not
• 14:33
  Speaker 4: the case at all, Georgia. In that same report, it
• 14:35
  Speaker 4: also found the home ownership was a huge challenge for
• 14:38
  Speaker 4: divorced parents, with forty percent of divorced mothers and thirty
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: two percent of divorced fathers still renting five years after
• 14:46
  Speaker 4: their marriage has ended. I think we can obviously see
• 14:49
  Speaker 4: that this is putting people in a position where they
• 14:51
  Speaker 4: are disadvantaged and they're not having the same opportunity that
• 14:54
  Speaker 4: they would have had. As much as we can look
• 14:56
  Speaker 4: at it pragmatically and go, okay, Georgia, well they had
• 14:58
  Speaker 4: a dual income, fantastic, But also, we don't ever want
• 15:02
  Speaker 4: to put you in a situation where you would be
• 15:05
  Speaker 4: disadvantaged if you decided to leave a situation that was
• 15:08
  Speaker 4: no longer serving you. And we know that relationships often
• 15:12
  Speaker 4: keep continuing because of financial reasons, so people might not
• 15:16
  Speaker 4: leave their relationship because they know this is going to happen.
• 15:20
  Speaker 4: So if we can have these conversations earlier, and we
• 15:22
  Speaker 4: can have these conversations so we're all on the same
• 15:25
  Speaker 4: page always, we won't ever be in a situation where
• 15:28
  Speaker 4: we are in a relationship because we know it's financially beneficial.
• 15:32
  Speaker 4: And I just feel like we deserve that we deserve
• 15:34
  Speaker 4: to be in a position where we can make a
• 15:36
  Speaker 4: choice that is not a financial choice, you know, all
• 15:40
  Speaker 4: of that fluffy stuff about following our heart. I just
• 15:42
  Speaker 4: feel like mental health is equally important to financial health.
• 15:46
  Speaker 3: I think another point to note, Victoria is that the
• 15:49
  Speaker 3: emotional toll and the heartache of divorce can mean that
• 15:52
  Speaker 3: people are just like wanting to get it over with
• 15:55
  Speaker 3: as soon as possible, just rushing through it, not really
• 15:57
  Speaker 3: thinking through their options. Would you say that that is
• 16:00
  Speaker 3: something we need to be mindful of.
• 16:02
  Speaker 4: Absolutely, I do feel like a lot of people rush
• 16:05
  Speaker 4: into a divorce, And I'm not saying that's a bad thing.
• 16:08
  Speaker 4: I mean, I've never been through a divorce, so I
• 16:10
  Speaker 4: can't say, hey, here's what I would do, this is
• 16:12
  Speaker 4: how it would pan out. I've been through relationship breakdowns.
• 16:16
  Speaker 4: I've been through, you know, separating from a partner who
• 16:19
  Speaker 4: I lived with, which was absolutely heartbreaking. But at the
• 16:22
  Speaker 4: same time, I feel like I also have a lot
• 16:25
  Speaker 4: of experience working with my clients who have gone through divorce,
• 16:28
  Speaker 4: and I think that if you're in a position when
• 16:31
  Speaker 4: you are thinking about this, the best thing you can
• 16:34
  Speaker 4: do is get advice before you let your partner know
• 16:36
  Speaker 4: that that's the case. And I think that that is
• 16:39
  Speaker 4: the number one thing that I know has changed the
• 16:42
  Speaker 4: trajectory of my client's ability to have an amicable divorce.
• 16:48
  Speaker 4: We're not saying go to a lawyer and then let
• 16:50
  Speaker 4: your partner know that you're divorcing them via the lawyer.
• 16:53
  Speaker 4: I think it's go to your financial advisor, go see
• 16:56
  Speaker 4: a counselor go and seek the help of a lawyer
• 16:58
  Speaker 4: for an hour just to un stand the process properly,
• 17:01
  Speaker 4: so that if this is something that is going to happen,
• 17:04
  Speaker 4: you're in a position where you actually know what's going on.
• 17:07
  Speaker 4: You're not pulling a trigger and not knowing where you're
• 17:09
  Speaker 4: going to land. And I think that that's a really
• 17:11
  Speaker 4: important part of this. It's not because you're and we've
• 17:14
  Speaker 4: done an episode Geordor on a financial abuse. Absolutely not
• 17:18
  Speaker 4: because you're in that situation. It's so that you are
• 17:21
  Speaker 4: empowered and have clarity and at a time when you
• 17:23
  Speaker 4: don't have heaps of certainty, that is going to make
• 17:26
  Speaker 4: you feel a whole heap more secure. So just get
• 17:29
  Speaker 4: some advice, know what the process is, understand what's going on.
• 17:33
  Speaker 4: But then from a financial point of view, before you
• 17:36
  Speaker 4: even do anything, make sure that you know your financial situation.
• 17:41
  Speaker 4: So if your partner and you share bank accounts, make
• 17:43
  Speaker 4: sure that you know where all of your money is
• 17:45
  Speaker 4: and what is going on. If you have joint assets,
• 17:48
  Speaker 4: make sure that you've got those listed in a place
• 17:50
  Speaker 4: that is easily accessible. And I'm not saying this is
• 17:54
  Speaker 4: because everything's going to go badly, but you need to
• 17:57
  Speaker 4: be in a position that if that happened, you go okay, well,
• 17:59
  Speaker 4: you know, A had all the information I needed and
• 18:01
  Speaker 4: you're not arguing over statements and trying to find where
• 18:04
  Speaker 4: things are. And we discussed this in the financial abuse episode,
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: which I think was a really impactful episode that helped
• 18:11
  Speaker 4: us put ourselves in positions where, you know, if we
• 18:14
  Speaker 4: were experiencing that, we knew what to do, but also
• 18:17
  Speaker 4: we knew the signs of that and how to protect
• 18:19
  Speaker 4: ourselves in the best possible way. So I think a
• 18:22
  Speaker 4: good family lawyer is someone that you can reach out
• 18:25
  Speaker 4: to to say, hey, let me know what the process is,
• 18:28
  Speaker 4: how do I make this as easy as possible, and
• 18:30
  Speaker 4: they will give you the expertise. Yeah, because you can
• 18:33
  Speaker 4: be proactive instead of reactive to the situation.
• 18:37
  Speaker 5: And more often than.
• 18:38
  Speaker 4: Not, you've probably been thinking about this for a while.
• 18:41
  Speaker 4: Let's be honest, it's not a ah I decided last
• 18:44
  Speaker 4: week I would like a divorce. Don't know where we're
• 18:46
  Speaker 4: going to land. I'll just let them know.
• 18:48
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 18:48
  Speaker 4: So I think that it's really important to just be
• 18:51
  Speaker 4: prepared and be you know, in a situation where you
• 18:54
  Speaker 4: are educated.
• 18:55
  Speaker 3: So seeing a lawyer and seeing a financial advisor are
• 18:58
  Speaker 3: potentially quite expensive of choices for some people, but you've
• 19:01
  Speaker 3: stressed the importance. Are there other places we can go
• 19:04
  Speaker 3: that are more affordable or free.
• 19:06
  Speaker 4: Georgia That is a really good point. And I think
• 19:08
  Speaker 4: that if you're in a position where you are able
• 19:10
  Speaker 4: to seek the advice of a lawyer or a financial
• 19:13
  Speaker 4: advisor that is really privileged. That is a great position
• 19:16
  Speaker 4: to be in. But if you are not in that position,
• 19:18
  Speaker 4: there are so many free resources and we'll put a
• 19:21
  Speaker 4: list in the show notes for everybody in case you
• 19:24
  Speaker 4: do want to access these, just so you can familiarize
• 19:27
  Speaker 4: yourself with the process or you know, if you're going
• 19:28
  Speaker 4: through something you're like Victoria, this is exactly what I've needed.
• 19:32
  Speaker 4: I hope that that can be of help to you.
• 19:34
  Speaker 4: Legal aid is a really good place to start because
• 19:36
  Speaker 4: they can help you seek out compassionate lawyers or even
• 19:39
  Speaker 4: lawyers who work pro bono if you're in that situation.
• 19:43
  Speaker 4: I think counseling or financial Counseling Australia is a really
• 19:46
  Speaker 4: good resource as well because they will help you get
• 19:49
  Speaker 4: through that situation. And obviously when you're talking to these people,
• 19:52
  Speaker 4: it's not because you want to personally understand how to
• 19:55
  Speaker 4: get through that. I think therapy is another thing that
• 19:57
  Speaker 4: you should be looking into, but Financial counsel Australia is
• 20:00
  Speaker 4: really great. The Debt Free Hotline is also a place
• 20:04
  Speaker 4: to go as well, which is really good and I'll
• 20:06
  Speaker 4: pop that in the show notes. There are also other
• 20:08
  Speaker 4: services like divorce counseling services. I actually have a friend,
• 20:13
  Speaker 4: Tanya Summerton, Hi, if you're listening. She runs a company
• 20:16
  Speaker 4: called Divorce Angel, and she actually has her own podcast
• 20:18
  Speaker 4: on getting a divorced and she guides you through the
• 20:21
  Speaker 4: process if you're worried or confused about where to start
• 20:23
  Speaker 4: with having a successful divorce. And she's really trying to
• 20:26
  Speaker 4: reframe divorce, which I think is incredible. She's very empowering.
• 20:31
  Speaker 4: She wants to hold your hand through the whole process
• 20:33
  Speaker 4: so that it can be amicable and you don't have
• 20:35
  Speaker 4: to get lawyers involved. So if you're at a stage where,
• 20:38
  Speaker 4: like Ketria, I need some advice, like I can't avoid
• 20:42
  Speaker 4: a lawyer, but like I've got some money to spend,
• 20:44
  Speaker 4: I think that something like Divorce Angel by Tanya Summittin
• 20:47
  Speaker 4: would be a really good thing. That's absolutely not a
• 20:49
  Speaker 4: paid plug, by the way. I just think that what
• 20:51
  Speaker 4: she does is honestly so beautiful, and you know, it's
• 20:55
  Speaker 4: reframing the way that we do get divorced. And she's
• 20:57
  Speaker 4: in a position where she is actually helping people. But
• 21:01
  Speaker 4: not many of us knew a service like this existed before. Now,
• 21:04
  Speaker 4: I bet I didn't exactly is that a woman's only thing.
• 21:08
  Speaker 4: It's for everybody, So these services are definitely not just
• 21:12
  Speaker 4: for females. At the end of the day, males experience
• 21:15
  Speaker 4: very similar outcomes and experience very similar disadvantage. Obviously not
• 21:21
  Speaker 4: to the same level that historically females have, but I
• 21:24
  Speaker 4: think that we really need to open up the conversation.
• 21:27
  Speaker 4: The waves doesn't just impact females, it impacts males as well. Yes,
• 21:30
  Speaker 4: as a woman, we are significantly more likely to experience disadvantage,
• 21:35
  Speaker 4: but wou'd be naive to say that it is a
• 21:37
  Speaker 4: female only problem.
• 21:38
  Speaker 3: Well, this kind of leads into my next question, Victoria,
• 21:40
  Speaker 3: because women are statistically worse off than men post of all,
• 21:45
  Speaker 3: So why why is that?
• 21:47
  Speaker 4: There are so many reasons, Georgia. And every relationship is different,
• 21:50
  Speaker 4: every relationship breakdown is different, so I can't speak for everybody,
• 21:55
  Speaker 4: but more often than not, a female is usually the
• 21:58
  Speaker 4: primary caregiver in a real relationship, especially if children are involved.
• 22:02
  Speaker 4: And I think that the sacrifices women make are not
• 22:06
  Speaker 4: necessarily sacrifices. They're making on purpose for financial reasons. So
• 22:11
  Speaker 4: more often than not, women will decide okay, well, I
• 22:13
  Speaker 4: just want to work part time in admin because my
• 22:15
  Speaker 4: husband works crazy hours and I'd love to be able
• 22:18
  Speaker 4: to pick the kids up from school at three point
• 22:20
  Speaker 4: fifteen every single day. And I think that that is
• 22:23
  Speaker 4: a lifestyle choice, but that's a choice that that woman
• 22:26
  Speaker 4: has made for her family. So more often than not,
• 22:29
  Speaker 4: if that's the experience she's had for the last ten
• 22:31
  Speaker 4: or fifteen years of her life, she has far less
• 22:34
  Speaker 4: earning potential coming out of that relationship, which therefore disadvantages her.
• 22:39
  Speaker 4: It's a really nice sacrifice you're making for your family,
• 22:42
  Speaker 4: but I think we really need to think about the
• 22:45
  Speaker 4: way we divide these tasks and actually choose our careers
• 22:49
  Speaker 4: when we have a family, and the sacrifices we're making
• 22:52
  Speaker 4: because if the relationship doesn't work out, which you know,
• 22:55
  Speaker 4: we don't want to be betting on that. We don't
• 22:56
  Speaker 4: want to say, hey, I would love to get another
• 23:00
  Speaker 4: because like, if this doesn't work out in our happily
• 23:02
  Speaker 4: married relationship, I just don't want to be disadvantaged. But
• 23:06
  Speaker 4: I think we really need to talk about it because
• 23:08
  Speaker 4: I think unknowingly, we as women make sacrifices for reasons
• 23:13
  Speaker 4: that makes sense at the time, whether that is our
• 23:16
  Speaker 4: family or our friends. Also, our partner can work longer hours.
• 23:20
  Speaker 4: We end up choosing things that put us in disadvantaged
• 23:24
  Speaker 4: positions over the long term. It's not one decision. It's
• 23:28
  Speaker 4: not she decided to stay home and therefore she was
• 23:31
  Speaker 4: in a disadvantage position when they broke up. It's the
• 23:33
  Speaker 4: small things. It's choosing to have a child and staying
• 23:37
  Speaker 4: home with that child for a couple of years, and
• 23:39
  Speaker 4: then that leading into wanting to work part time because
• 23:42
  Speaker 4: you want to put your family first, and not going
• 23:44
  Speaker 4: and chasing that career or that dream that you had,
• 23:47
  Speaker 4: and being in a position where you're not actually progressing
• 23:50
  Speaker 4: your career in the same way that your partner is.
• 23:53
  Speaker 4: That puts you at a significant disadvantage. Now, if you're
• 23:56
  Speaker 4: in a relationship for the rest of ever, that's fantastic
• 23:59
  Speaker 4: because you have really great income. But I think that
• 24:02
  Speaker 4: more often than not, women are not getting the recognition
• 24:05
  Speaker 4: they need for the sacrifices they are making that actually
• 24:08
  Speaker 4: propel their partner's careers. And I think we need to
• 24:11
  Speaker 4: probably have a really good discussion and just open the
• 24:14
  Speaker 4: conversation up about that, because women are making these sacrifices
• 24:18
  Speaker 4: and they aren't just financial, they're about career success, they're
• 24:21
  Speaker 4: about family, they're about friends, so Georgia. Whilst divorce has
• 24:25
  Speaker 4: little impact on a man's employment status, which is quite scary,
• 24:29
  Speaker 4: many female divorces do end up returning to work, which
• 24:32
  Speaker 4: is fantastic, but they end up receiving ten percent less
• 24:35
  Speaker 4: remuneration than a married woman. Why do you think that
• 24:37
  Speaker 4: is such just because they're not perceived as being as
• 24:40
  Speaker 4: skilled anymore because they've been out of the game, or
• 24:42
  Speaker 4: potentially it's likely because they were perceived as having been
• 24:45
  Speaker 4: out of the gay men and not as vital as
• 24:47
  Speaker 4: an employee as they would have been had they not
• 24:50
  Speaker 4: gone on a break, which is heartbreaking Georgia. And now
• 24:53
  Speaker 4: they're really interesting. Stat from Relationships Australia found that women
• 24:56
  Speaker 4: are less likely than men to remarry after divorce, so
• 25:00
  Speaker 4: they are relying on that one income rather than reaping
• 25:04
  Speaker 4: the benefits of having two streams of income, like a
• 25:06
  Speaker 4: lot of men might jump back into a relationship, get
• 25:08
  Speaker 4: married and then have a duel income again some women,
• 25:12
  Speaker 4: or actually from her research, most women don't actually remarry
• 25:15
  Speaker 4: after divorce, which is interesting.
• 25:18
  Speaker 3: I think also they're not going to be jumping into
• 25:21
  Speaker 3: CEO positions or those really high powered positions because they
• 25:23
  Speaker 3: have been out of the game for that long as well, right, Like,
• 25:26
  Speaker 3: that's not going to be earning a killing straight away.
• 25:29
  Speaker 4: Absolutely, And I think it's really upsetting to see as well,
• 25:32
  Speaker 4: because I feel like women have so much to offer,
• 25:36
  Speaker 4: and even if you haven't quote been working, you've been
• 25:39
  Speaker 4: learning relationship management, you've been bringing children up, You've been
• 25:43
  Speaker 4: learning so much and doing so much, and I just
• 25:46
  Speaker 4: feel like those skills can be super transferable into a workplace,
• 25:50
  Speaker 4: and workplaces in general need to be a little bit
• 25:52
  Speaker 4: more open to this discussion and you know, bringing people
• 25:56
  Speaker 4: in and saying cool, you're really skilled, Like look at
• 25:58
  Speaker 4: the dedication you've had over the line last eighteen years,
• 26:01
  Speaker 4: Like look how crazy that is. You've you know, literally
• 26:04
  Speaker 4: developed people. How cool is that? And I think that
• 26:08
  Speaker 4: another stat that I want to throw in here before
• 26:10
  Speaker 4: you know you ask another question which I can see
• 26:12
  Speaker 4: you're excited to do, is that sixty three percent of
• 26:15
  Speaker 4: single mothers receive a government pension as their principal source
• 26:19
  Speaker 4: of income.
• 26:19
  Speaker 3: Do you think that means that they're not working?
• 26:22
  Speaker 4: Jordre absolutely could mean that, but a lot of single
• 26:24
  Speaker 4: mothers actually receive a government pension. Because they're not able
• 26:27
  Speaker 4: to find employment, or the fact that childcare is far
• 26:30
  Speaker 4: more expensive than what the government pension actually provides them
• 26:33
  Speaker 4: with or what a part time salary is actually going
• 26:36
  Speaker 4: to pay them. Childcare around Australia is insanely expensive. So
• 26:41
  Speaker 4: I think that if you are then in a single
• 26:43
  Speaker 4: income family, going back to work for some women just
• 26:46
  Speaker 4: doesn't make any financial sense because they end up, you know,
• 26:49
  Speaker 4: actually backwards. Childcare each day can be up to two
• 26:52
  Speaker 4: hundred and fifty dollars a day for a child here
• 26:55
  Speaker 4: in Melbourne.
• 26:56
  Speaker 3: Is that true.
• 26:57
  Speaker 4: Yes, it is, and it's insane. So it makes sense
• 26:59
  Speaker 4: that that might be a reason why women are saying, well,
• 27:02
  Speaker 4: I don't want to go back to work. It makes
• 27:03
  Speaker 4: absolutely no sense. I'll stay home with my family, look
• 27:07
  Speaker 4: after them. I get to spend time with my kids,
• 27:08
  Speaker 4: I love them, because it's actually just too expensive for
• 27:12
  Speaker 4: them to go back to work, which also shoots ourselves
• 27:14
  Speaker 4: in the foot because we don't actually get that career
• 27:17
  Speaker 4: experience that we would love to say we had should
• 27:20
  Speaker 4: we want to then go get another job once they're
• 27:23
  Speaker 4: back in school. So I feel like there is just
• 27:25
  Speaker 4: so much here that plays into it, and we as
• 27:28
  Speaker 4: a whole need to understand a little bit more about it.
• 27:31
  Speaker 4: Do you deal with many divorces in your line of work? Look,
• 27:34
  Speaker 4: I can't say I've dealt with heaps and heaps and
• 27:36
  Speaker 4: heaps of them, but I have held the hand of
• 27:37
  Speaker 4: a number of clients going through this situation and it's
• 27:41
  Speaker 4: empowering at the same time as being a little bit
• 27:44
  Speaker 4: confusing for them. I feel like once they have decided
• 27:47
  Speaker 4: that that's the case. I've worked with clients where it's
• 27:50
  Speaker 4: really straightforward and their partner and them just separate assets
• 27:54
  Speaker 4: and it's very, very straightforward, Whereas I also have a
• 27:58
  Speaker 4: couple of clients who their divorce drawn out over a
• 28:01
  Speaker 4: number of years because they can't come to a settlement
• 28:04
  Speaker 4: and someone wants one thing but the other person doesn't
• 28:07
  Speaker 4: want them to have it, or you know, child support
• 28:09
  Speaker 4: can't be agreed upon or whatever it is. So yes,
• 28:13
  Speaker 4: I have dealt with it in my line of work,
• 28:15
  Speaker 4: and I just feel like what we need to be
• 28:17
  Speaker 4: mindful of is putting ourselves first and making sure that
• 28:21
  Speaker 4: we are actually looking after ourselves sometimes, and I know
• 28:25
  Speaker 4: that this is not what a lot of people going
• 28:27
  Speaker 4: through this are going to want to hear. Sometimes the
• 28:30
  Speaker 4: fight is not worth it. Sometimes it is better to
• 28:33
  Speaker 4: just say, you know what, clean slate for my mental health,
• 28:36
  Speaker 4: for my physical health, for my family. I'm just calling
• 28:39
  Speaker 4: it a day. We're not going to argue over this
• 28:41
  Speaker 4: ten thousand dollars. I think sometimes people do get really
• 28:45
  Speaker 4: wrapped up into he said, she said, she wants, he wants,
• 28:49
  Speaker 4: they want whatever that looks like, and they actually forget
• 28:53
  Speaker 4: about their mental health and this can drag on for years.
• 28:56
  Speaker 3: I can imagine like, you're not breaking up with them
• 28:58
  Speaker 3: because they're the best. You're probably a little bit sick
• 29:01
  Speaker 3: of them.
• 29:01
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you're probably a little bit sick of them. You're
• 29:03
  Speaker 4: probably a little bit bitter. And I just feel like
• 29:06
  Speaker 4: we need to sit back and think about this ourselves
• 29:08
  Speaker 4: and go is this actually serving me?
• 29:10
  Speaker 3: Like?
• 29:10
  Speaker 4: Do I need this?
• 29:11
  Speaker 5: Please?
• 29:12
  Speaker 4: Don't get me wrong, there are definitely fights worth having,
• 29:15
  Speaker 4: but sometimes we really need to have a little bit
• 29:17
  Speaker 4: of a think. And I've sought through this with clients before,
• 29:20
  Speaker 4: where we go, is this worth it? Do we want
• 29:22
  Speaker 4: this to drag on for another twelve months? Or do
• 29:25
  Speaker 4: you want your headspace back?
• 29:26
  Speaker 5: Yeah?
• 29:27
  Speaker 4: Like, do you want this to be the thing that
• 29:28
  Speaker 4: you think about each and every single day? Or do
• 29:31
  Speaker 4: we want to just bite the bullet and find a
• 29:32
  Speaker 4: way that we can interpret charge your income and actually
• 29:35
  Speaker 4: get you to a point where you can just generate
• 29:37
  Speaker 4: that back and go, you know what, that was a
• 29:39
  Speaker 4: really bad investment.
• 29:40
  Speaker 3: So Victoria, would you say that a way of avoiding
• 29:43
  Speaker 3: all of this angst is to get a little prenup
• 29:47
  Speaker 3: set up in our relationships, such a thing.
• 29:49
  Speaker 4: I mean, if you were in America, that would be
• 29:50
  Speaker 4: a really good I need to set up a pre nup.
• 29:53
  Speaker 4: But given we're in Australia, we don't actually have pre nups.
• 29:56
  Speaker 5: Really.
• 29:57
  Speaker 4: No, you can see a lawyer and you can actually
• 29:59
  Speaker 4: have what we call here a binding financial agreement established,
• 30:03
  Speaker 4: which I absolutely well and truly would recommend. They are
• 30:06
  Speaker 4: also referred to as bfas, which I think is really important.
• 30:09
  Speaker 4: But yes, I think that a common misconception here in
• 30:12
  Speaker 4: Australia is that prenups actually exist in the same way
• 30:15
  Speaker 4: that we think that credit scores are really important and
• 30:18
  Speaker 4: actually are going to impact our entire lives. That's an
• 30:21
  Speaker 4: American thing. I think that we really need to be
• 30:23
  Speaker 4: in a situation where we understand what's going on, and
• 30:26
  Speaker 4: a BFA is something that you could implement that could
• 30:29
  Speaker 4: put you in a position where should your relationship break down,
• 30:33
  Speaker 4: you will know how to divide up those assets and
• 30:36
  Speaker 4: resources if it comes to that. And I actually think
• 30:40
  Speaker 4: that this is something that if you are moving in
• 30:42
  Speaker 4: with anyone, Georgia, you should be thinking about. I don't
• 30:45
  Speaker 4: care how old you are, I don't care what situation
• 30:48
  Speaker 4: that is. If you're in a situation where you are
• 30:50
  Speaker 4: moving in with a partner, you should be comfortable enough
• 30:53
  Speaker 4: to talk about your assets. And if you're not comfortable
• 30:55
  Speaker 4: enough to talk about your assets with a partner that
• 30:57
  Speaker 4: you're literally moving in with, I think you need to
• 31:00
  Speaker 4: have a think about how comfortable you are to actually
• 31:03
  Speaker 4: moving with them. So a binding financial agreement, I think
• 31:06
  Speaker 4: is actually a really beautiful thing. And I know that
• 31:08
  Speaker 4: this sounds really lame, but the idea that while you
• 31:12
  Speaker 4: to have an incredible relationship like Georgia, I want to
• 31:16
  Speaker 4: move in with you. We are so in love, we
• 31:18
  Speaker 4: are so excited to do this, that is the time
• 31:21
  Speaker 4: that we should be having the discussion about what happens
• 31:24
  Speaker 4: if this doesn't work out. Because I think that in
• 31:27
  Speaker 4: that moment, and in that situation in life, you are
• 31:30
  Speaker 4: most likely to be thinking the straightest about what happens
• 31:34
  Speaker 4: if we break up. I want the best for you, Georgia.
• 31:37
  Speaker 4: I want you to be as equitable as me. And
• 31:40
  Speaker 4: if you can sit down and create a binding financial
• 31:43
  Speaker 4: agreement together that says, okay, well, if we go our
• 31:46
  Speaker 4: separate ways, I want the best for you because I'm
• 31:48
  Speaker 4: so in love with you, and vice versa, you actually
• 31:51
  Speaker 4: come to an agreement that once everything hits the fan, like,
• 31:55
  Speaker 4: let's be honest, divorce is messy, like people get bitter.
• 31:58
  Speaker 4: It's really nice to have a docum meant to fall
• 32:00
  Speaker 4: back on and say, hey, this is the document we
• 32:03
  Speaker 4: put together when we just wanted the best for each other,
• 32:06
  Speaker 4: truly and honestly, and this is what we are going
• 32:09
  Speaker 4: to do. So I think that it is really important
• 32:11
  Speaker 4: to do that, regardless of who you're moving in with
• 32:14
  Speaker 4: or how old you are. I think that it is
• 32:15
  Speaker 4: a really nice thing to go through. I've done this
• 32:18
  Speaker 4: with my partner, and I think that it is really
• 32:20
  Speaker 4: important to do it with any partner that you're considering
• 32:23
  Speaker 4: living with or pursuing a very significant relationship with.
• 32:26
  Speaker 3: It sounds kind of unromantic, though, no.
• 32:29
  Speaker 4: Look it is totally unromantic, But I do think that
• 32:32
  Speaker 4: we need to be a little bit more comfortable with
• 32:35
  Speaker 4: the unromantic because it creates a more stable relationship. Knowing
• 32:39
  Speaker 4: where you stand all the time is really important. And
• 32:42
  Speaker 4: now I don't want you entering relationships with the idea
• 32:46
  Speaker 4: in your head that it might not work out. Hopefully,
• 32:48
  Speaker 4: this binding financial agreement that you're right is the biggest
• 32:51
  Speaker 4: waste of time you ever go through, because you end
• 32:55
  Speaker 4: up in a position where you never use it and
• 32:56
  Speaker 4: it gets put in a drawer somewhere somehow, and years
• 32:59
  Speaker 4: from now someone's cleaning out your drawers because you're no
• 33:02
  Speaker 4: longer around them.
• 33:02
  Speaker 5: Wow, like this exists. Yeah, Like that's how I want.
• 33:06
  Speaker 4: The agreement to exist. I don't want people going into
• 33:09
  Speaker 4: relationships with the expectation that they won't work out. But
• 33:13
  Speaker 4: I do think that we need to be putting ourselves first,
• 33:15
  Speaker 4: because if things start to get rocky and we start
• 33:18
  Speaker 4: to feel really uncomfortable, the best thing that we can
• 33:21
  Speaker 4: do is know what the plan is. And how do
• 33:23
  Speaker 4: you know how the other person is going to react
• 33:24
  Speaker 4: if you haven't discussed it before.
• 33:26
  Speaker 3: So it's like a little bit of insurance for the relationship.
• 33:28
  Speaker 4: Absolutely, and I think that it's really important to see
• 33:31
  Speaker 4: it that way. I genuinely think it is a really
• 33:34
  Speaker 4: good thing. I know it's unromantic. You're not going to
• 33:36
  Speaker 4: be like, hey, dabe, let's go on a date night
• 33:37
  Speaker 4: and talk about our blinding financial agreement.
• 33:39
  Speaker 3: That kind of sounds like something you would do, though, yeah, look.
• 33:42
  Speaker 4: Me personally, but definitely not other people. But you are right,
• 33:46
  Speaker 4: they are unromantic. But I think that it is really
• 33:48
  Speaker 4: important to have this discussion with your partner and what
• 33:52
  Speaker 4: that actually means and how that's actually going to work,
• 33:55
  Speaker 4: because it's such a powerful position to be in, and
• 33:57
  Speaker 4: it will just make you as a couple stronger.
• 34:00
  Speaker 3: You think about your partner and you're like, they will
• 34:02
  Speaker 3: never do the wrong thing by me. I love them,
• 34:04
  Speaker 3: they love me. But you know you're fast forward forty
• 34:07
  Speaker 3: years down the track. Bloody hate Tomo your partner. I
• 34:10
  Speaker 3: don't know why I chose Tomo as a name, but
• 34:12
  Speaker 3: you know, things can get nasty, and we can underestimate
• 34:15
  Speaker 3: that when we're in the throes of love in the.
• 34:17
  Speaker 4: Early stages, right, which is exactly why I think that
• 34:20
  Speaker 4: while you are in the throes of love and you
• 34:22
  Speaker 4: are so loved up and want the best for each other,
• 34:24
  Speaker 4: that is the best time to create an agreement where
• 34:26
  Speaker 4: you are both putting each other first. And I think
• 34:29
  Speaker 4: that that is really important to take into consideration because
• 34:32
  Speaker 4: by the time that you are getting a divorce, more
• 34:35
  Speaker 4: often than not, something has triggered it. Let's be honest,
• 34:39
  Speaker 4: and I think that you know, when you're under financial
• 34:41
  Speaker 4: stress and when you are under relationship stress and maybe
• 34:44
  Speaker 4: there's someone else involved, things get really bitter, and I
• 34:48
  Speaker 4: think that you need to just be really pragmatic about it. Okay, well,
• 34:52
  Speaker 4: this is what we agreed upon. And I know couples
• 34:54
  Speaker 4: who have binding financial agreements that differ depending on what
• 34:57
  Speaker 4: the outcome of the relationship is what I mean, So
• 35:00
  Speaker 4: if some partner cheats, really a different set of outcomes
• 35:04
  Speaker 4: will ensue. So it's super interesting, and you can talk
• 35:09
  Speaker 4: to a lawyer about what you could include in yours
• 35:11
  Speaker 4: or what you're most comfortable with. But I know that
• 35:14
  Speaker 4: a lot of couples. You know, you can get a
• 35:17
  Speaker 4: stock standard binding financial agreement, but you can also get
• 35:20
  Speaker 4: a really customized one depending on what you want.
• 35:23
  Speaker 3: Do you have to do it as well at the
• 35:24
  Speaker 3: start of the relationship or when you're moving in or
• 35:27
  Speaker 3: before you get married, or can you do it like
• 35:29
  Speaker 3: five years into your marriage.
• 35:30
  Speaker 4: You can do it whenever. But I do feel like
• 35:32
  Speaker 4: that if you're like Toney's into a marriage, then turning hey,
• 35:35
  Speaker 4: honey about a binding financial agreement a.
• 35:38
  Speaker 5: Little bit suspicious, A little bit suspicious.
• 35:40
  Speaker 4: But also maybe a little bit late, because you already
• 35:42
  Speaker 4: have joint assets and you already are in a position where,
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: let's say you go to court and things happen, like
• 35:48
  Speaker 4: the start point is fifty to fifty for the court,
• 35:50
  Speaker 4: and then it goes back and forth from there. I'm
• 35:53
  Speaker 4: by no means a lawyer, so this is by no
• 35:55
  Speaker 4: means legal advice, but I think that it is really
• 35:57
  Speaker 4: important to get it upfront from the beginning so that
• 36:00
  Speaker 4: you are on your own standing. But also, Georgia, I
• 36:03
  Speaker 4: think that because we are here trying to empower young
• 36:06
  Speaker 4: women to get their stuff together and be really financially
• 36:09
  Speaker 4: literate on their road, we're going to see, hopefully, like
• 36:13
  Speaker 4: let's cross our fingers, so many more women going into
• 36:16
  Speaker 4: relationships with assets that I genuinely think should be protected.
• 36:21
  Speaker 4: And the BFA is something that is going to help
• 36:23
  Speaker 4: you say, hey, cool, so if we're going to go
• 36:25
  Speaker 4: and live together, this share portfolio that I have been
• 36:27
  Speaker 4: growing for myself. If we break up, you're not you
• 36:30
  Speaker 4: don't get any of that, and I want you to
• 36:32
  Speaker 4: sign that you're very comfortable with that because you didn't
• 36:35
  Speaker 4: work your butt off for someone else to take half
• 36:37
  Speaker 4: of your stuff.
• 36:38
  Speaker 3: Okay, so bfas slush prenups if you will are obviously
• 36:42
  Speaker 3: a really good idea. But what should we be doing
• 36:45
  Speaker 3: if we don't have a prenup slush BFA, how can
• 36:47
  Speaker 3: we prepare ourselves for divorce?
• 36:49
  Speaker 4: We want prenup, we want prena. Yeah, I know, maybe
• 36:52
  Speaker 4: that could be edited out. But before you do anything,
• 36:55
  Speaker 4: I think seek advice. They already said this. Golden gets
• 36:58
  Speaker 4: some advice, because if you've got a lawyer, they should
• 37:01
  Speaker 4: be able to figure out the best situation of exit
• 37:03
  Speaker 4: for you. As I said, we want to be really
• 37:07
  Speaker 4: prepared and not reactive to the situation, like we actually
• 37:10
  Speaker 4: want to plan our exit and make sure that we
• 37:13
  Speaker 4: are utilizing the free resources that are available, some of which,
• 37:16
  Speaker 4: as we said, we're going to leave in the show
• 37:17
  Speaker 4: notes for you so you can make a plan that
• 37:20
  Speaker 4: works best for you and you can actually stage this
• 37:23
  Speaker 4: exit in the best way that puts you both in
• 37:26
  Speaker 4: the best possible position. It also gives you time to
• 37:29
  Speaker 4: start utilizing free resources and educate yourself on what's going
• 37:32
  Speaker 4: to happen and make a plan. And this could be
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: from small things like okay, like I want to start
• 37:37
  Speaker 4: thinking about this, like where am I going to move like,
• 37:39
  Speaker 4: which is obviously a big thing, but also about assets
• 37:43
  Speaker 4: more holistically and actually understanding what's going on. And as
• 37:46
  Speaker 4: I said, there are so many other resources that are
• 37:48
  Speaker 4: available George that I'm just going to link in the
• 37:50
  Speaker 4: show notes. So I think that those are things that
• 37:53
  Speaker 4: we need to have a look at. And i'd also
• 37:55
  Speaker 4: like to say, and I've said this about financial advisors.
• 37:59
  Speaker 4: Having a good financial advisories obviously really important. It is
• 38:02
  Speaker 4: also very much like having a good doctor, like if
• 38:05
  Speaker 4: you don't feel comfortable with your doctor to tell them
• 38:08
  Speaker 4: what's up or if there's a problem, how can they
• 38:10
  Speaker 4: actually help you solve that issue, Which is what I
• 38:13
  Speaker 4: say to all my clients in their first session. I'll
• 38:15
  Speaker 4: always say literally be like, hey, I have loved this session,
• 38:18
  Speaker 4: but if I'm not the right fit for you, that's
• 38:21
  Speaker 4: totally okay. I need you to be really comfortable with me.
• 38:24
  Speaker 4: The same thing goes for divorce lawyers. Don't just choose
• 38:27
  Speaker 4: the first one you meet because you're flustered and you're worried.
• 38:31
  Speaker 4: If you do not feel like that is the right fit,
• 38:33
  Speaker 4: shop around, Go meet other people, understand who's there. Maybe
• 38:37
  Speaker 4: talk to a friend who has been through a divorce
• 38:39
  Speaker 4: and get some advice, and put yourself in a position
• 38:42
  Speaker 4: where you can actually see yourself working with that lawyer
• 38:46
  Speaker 4: if you need one, because you're going to be paying
• 38:48
  Speaker 4: them money. You're probably going to be paying them a
• 38:50
  Speaker 4: lot of money, and it's really important to get along
• 38:52
  Speaker 4: with them as they're the ones that are going to
• 38:54
  Speaker 4: be engaging in the divorce and they need to understand you,
• 38:57
  Speaker 4: and you need to feel like they're putting you first.
• 39:00
  Speaker 4: Another thing I want to note here before you try
• 39:02
  Speaker 4: and wrap me up to all this question, is that
• 39:05
  Speaker 4: if there are kids involved, which likely there will be,
• 39:08
  Speaker 4: given that forty seven point three percent of divorces involve
• 39:11
  Speaker 4: children according to our friends at the ABS, it is
• 39:14
  Speaker 4: a really good idea to strive to settle sooner rather
• 39:17
  Speaker 4: than later. And this is not just personal advice, this
• 39:20
  Speaker 4: is advice that I think every divorce lawyer would agree
• 39:23
  Speaker 4: with me on. This avoids the kids being used as
• 39:26
  Speaker 4: a negotiation tool, And I know that that sounds really
• 39:29
  Speaker 4: savage and really mean, but we all know it has happened.
• 39:31
  Speaker 4: We all know about joint custody discussions and arguments that
• 39:35
  Speaker 4: people have been through. Sometimes one party will try and
• 39:38
  Speaker 4: ask for a fifty to fifty custody settle if it
• 39:40
  Speaker 4: means that they will have to pay less child support, etc.
• 39:43
  Speaker 4: But if you settle on the financial early, then this
• 39:46
  Speaker 4: is far less likely to occur. So I think that
• 39:48
  Speaker 4: it's really important to do this, and then also want
• 39:51
  Speaker 4: to stress speak to a financial advisor if you've just
• 39:54
  Speaker 4: gone through a divorce, like it is really important to
• 39:56
  Speaker 4: make sure that you are getting back on track asap
• 39:59
  Speaker 4: and you are putting yourself first, and you are putting
• 40:01
  Speaker 4: future you first because you don't want to be disadvantaged
• 40:05
  Speaker 4: long term. You know what, Talk to your friends as well,
• 40:07
  Speaker 4: create a network, be open, be honest that you're going
• 40:10
  Speaker 4: through something that's pretty challenging and you'll be surprised at
• 40:13
  Speaker 4: the people that show up. Just ensure that you feel
• 40:15
  Speaker 4: supported through the whole process.
• 40:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 40:17
  Speaker 3: So this conversation has absolutely not covered everything, but I
• 40:21
  Speaker 3: think we've had a really good chat about the financial
• 40:23
  Speaker 3: aspects of divorce. Obviously it's an incredibly emotionally taxing time
• 40:28
  Speaker 3: and there'd be a plethora of podcasts and resources out
• 40:31
  Speaker 3: there for people who are going through divorce and need
• 40:34
  Speaker 3: that support, So we'll probably, I don't know, maybe we
• 40:36
  Speaker 3: could create a blog post and.
• 40:37
  Speaker 5: Yeah, absolutely I think that of the great ratourses.
• 40:41
  Speaker 3: But hopefully this chat has helped you out in some
• 40:43
  Speaker 3: way today. Hi, then you've breached that ses on the
• 40:50
  Speaker 3: moneymail box. Do you have a money problem you want
• 40:52
  Speaker 3: help solving? Do you have the money to lemmy? You
• 40:54
  Speaker 3: just want to chat about? Victoria is here to help.
• 40:57
  Speaker 3: Every week we'll be playing your questions to help make
• 40:59
  Speaker 3: sense of a honey mess you may have found yourself in.
• 41:01
  Speaker 3: Make a quick recording on your phone and send it
• 41:03
  Speaker 3: through to podcasts at choose onthmoney dot com. Do you
• 41:06
  Speaker 3: and you might even find yourself on the show. But
• 41:08
  Speaker 3: for now, here's today's listener question.
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: Hello. So I'm just checking in because I've been living
• 41:15
  Speaker 2: with my partner for ten years now. We're not married,
• 41:18
  Speaker 2: but we do have a shared mortgage and we've decided
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: it's time to move on as it's just not working anymore. Fortunately,
• 41:25
  Speaker 2: we are on good terms, which will make the process easier,
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: But I was wondering if you had any tips on
• 41:31
  Speaker 2: how I can set myself up financially for the future.
• 41:35
  Speaker 3: What is the deal with this one, Victoria?
• 41:38
  Speaker 4: Well, it is interesting because, as she's mentioned, she's not married,
• 41:42
  Speaker 4: but in Australia, the fact her partners are treated the
• 41:45
  Speaker 4: same as married partners. It's the rules and regulations that
• 41:48
  Speaker 4: go around that, and they are treated very, very similarly
• 41:52
  Speaker 4: to marriages. You just don't have to go through the
• 41:54
  Speaker 4: court proceedings of getting an official divorce. Yeah, but you
• 41:57
  Speaker 4: do need to register that you're no longer in a
• 41:59
  Speaker 4: relationationship together because you will be nominated as a de
• 42:03
  Speaker 4: facto partner and that could be on your tax return,
• 42:05
  Speaker 4: It could be through birth jests and marriages, it could
• 42:07
  Speaker 4: be through anything. But if you've lived with your partner
• 42:10
  Speaker 4: for more than two years, as our listener has obviously,
• 42:13
  Speaker 4: then you are actually classified as de facto and you
• 42:16
  Speaker 4: will be financially intertwined. And I think that that's a
• 42:19
  Speaker 4: really important point because two years creeps up pretty quickly,
• 42:23
  Speaker 4: Like I know that I didn't in my personal relationship,
• 42:26
  Speaker 4: didn't realize how quickly it creeped up. And I think
• 42:28
  Speaker 4: that it's really important to know. So since March two
• 42:32
  Speaker 4: thousand and nine, de facto and married couples are treated
• 42:35
  Speaker 4: exactly the same. As I said, there is no difference.
• 42:38
  Speaker 4: It is somewhat recent, so I know that some people
• 42:41
  Speaker 4: will be getting advice from parents or family or friends
• 42:44
  Speaker 4: the say no, no, no, de facto isn't married, no nowadays,
• 42:47
  Speaker 4: And I know that two thousand and nine, although it
• 42:49
  Speaker 4: doesn't feel that long ago, it's totally long ago, is
• 42:53
  Speaker 4: actually exactly the same. So your de factor has two
• 42:56
  Speaker 4: years from separation to make any claims on your assets
• 42:59
  Speaker 4: if they can establish one, and I think that that's
• 43:01
  Speaker 4: really important as well. So you might be amicable. But
• 43:05
  Speaker 4: for two years after you separate, they can actually come
• 43:08
  Speaker 4: back and go, hey, Georgie, actually about that, and they
• 43:12
  Speaker 4: have a legal standing to do that, which is quite
• 43:15
  Speaker 4: scary because often there's a period of time where people
• 43:17
  Speaker 4: are waiting out that two years and going, oh, can
• 43:20
  Speaker 4: they can't they? I don't know if they're going to
• 43:22
  Speaker 4: ask for it or not. So there's a couple of
• 43:24
  Speaker 4: rules around this. So if they meet these following criteria,
• 43:28
  Speaker 4: they could potentially make a claim on your assets. So
• 43:30
  Speaker 4: the first one is that you live together as a
• 43:32
  Speaker 4: couple on a quote genuine domestic basis for two years
• 43:36
  Speaker 4: obviously they've met, that you have a child together, or
• 43:39
  Speaker 4: they make a substantial contribution on your property, and there
• 43:43
  Speaker 4: would be serious injustice if they were not permitted to
• 43:45
  Speaker 4: make a claim. So that could be you moved in
• 43:47
  Speaker 4: and with a partner who owned a property, and then
• 43:49
  Speaker 4: over the last ten years you guys have renovated it together,
• 43:52
  Speaker 4: albeit it was somebody else's property to begin with, you
• 43:56
  Speaker 4: kind of start to get some eligibility to make a
• 43:59
  Speaker 4: claim on that. So I think it's really really important
• 44:02
  Speaker 4: to take these things into consideration. So for our listener,
• 44:05
  Speaker 4: I would suggest, just like I would advise any client
• 44:08
  Speaker 4: heading into advorce, to your research, go and see a
• 44:11
  Speaker 4: family lawyer, plant stage it, understand it, and utilize some
• 44:16
  Speaker 4: of the appomentioned free resources and advice to figure out
• 44:19
  Speaker 4: how you can best set yourself up for a positive
• 44:22
  Speaker 4: experience in the breakup of a relationship. Now, as she said,
• 44:25
  Speaker 4: they're amicable, but this sometimes isn't always the case forever.
• 44:29
  Speaker 4: So I think just getting it done asap, but also
• 44:32
  Speaker 4: getting good advice along the way and making sure you're
• 44:34
  Speaker 4: in a financially stable position. As soon as you can
• 44:38
  Speaker 4: is really important. A financial advisor, family lawyer. We can
• 44:41
  Speaker 4: help you here, but by looking at all of your
• 44:43
  Speaker 4: assets and projected future wealth, you'll be able to put
• 44:46
  Speaker 4: all your cards on the table and clarify it for
• 44:48
  Speaker 4: us in them because at the end of the day,
• 44:50
  Speaker 4: I can't help you if I don't know what's going on.
• 44:56
  Speaker 3: Now for the fun stuff, what good would a money
• 44:58
  Speaker 3: podcast be without the furby bits. It's time for money diaries.
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: Hi, I'm twenty five and I'm adjusting to the real
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: world and this is my money diary.
• 45:05
  Speaker 3: I started off by asking her about her attitude to money.
• 45:08
  Speaker 1: I grew up in sort of an average household. My
• 45:12
  Speaker 1: mom was a stay at home mum for majority of
• 45:15
  Speaker 1: my life, and so my parents were living off a
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: single income, and so I think I've developed quite good
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: money habits because we had to sort of ration to
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: be able to live on that single income for my
• 45:26
  Speaker 1: mom to be able to raise my brother and I.
• 45:29
  Speaker 1: So we never had a lot, but what my dad
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: sort of brought into the family, we really had to
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: make it go far. So up until the age of
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: twenty three, when I moved to Melbourne, I was super
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: good at saving. Yeah, I had a job all throughout
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: university and I even bought my first car or by myself,
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: and then I bought my second car, which was about
• 45:52
  Speaker 1: fifteen grand I managed to buy that outright. So I
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: had a really good relationship with money early on, which
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: is kind of funny. It's like the opposite to most people.
• 46:02
  Speaker 1: Normally they get better with money, but I kind of
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: got worse with it. When I moved to Melbourne. I
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: found it extremely hard to adjust to paying rent and
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: paying bills, and also in a new city, you want
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: to make new friends and things. So I was, you know,
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: spending a lot going out, and you know, I moved
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: over here with a suitcase of stuff, and so to
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: kind of build my life, I had to spend a
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: lot of my savings. So that really took a hit.
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: But now that I'm twenty five, I've sort of been
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: back on the savings dwagon for about probably six to
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: twelve months now.
• 46:35
  Speaker 3: So yeah, let's get into the juicy stuff. How much
• 46:37
  Speaker 3: does she earn and how much is sitting in her
• 46:39
  Speaker 3: bank account right now?
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: So for work, I'm a business administrator and I'm currently
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: on sixty two k plus super so I've got quite
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: a few bank accounts. In my main house savings, I
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: currently have twelve thousand dollars for an emergency fund, which
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: is two thousand dollars, and then I've just got, you know,
• 46:56
  Speaker 1: a few hundred in the other various accounts like bills
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: and things like that. So I'd say, all up, I've
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: probably got about fifteen thousand dollars.
• 47:03
  Speaker 3: And what exactly happens to that money after it's deposited
• 47:06
  Speaker 3: into her account.
• 47:07
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to get used to being paid monthly for
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: the first time, which is actually quite difficult. So what
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: I've done is I've created a bunch of bank accounts.
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: So the first thing that I do is transfer money
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: into my savings account, and then from there, I've got
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: all little individual accounts like a bill's account. I've got
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: one for my cat just for expenses for that, I've
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: for a short term savings account. So I'm really trying
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: to divide my money up because by the end of
• 47:34
  Speaker 1: the month, I kind of find that I'm running quite
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: low on funds, so just dividing it up kind of
• 47:39
  Speaker 1: makes it easier for me to grab what I need.
• 47:42
  Speaker 3: How does she feel about investing? Does she invest?
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: And if so I have invested, and I do invest.
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: I was very fortunate that when I was when I
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: was about twenty one, I inherited ten thousand dollars from
• 47:57
  Speaker 1: a passing of a family member, and I was in
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: a really good position that the initial instinct would be
• 48:05
  Speaker 1: to spend that money. But speaking to my dad, he said,
• 48:08
  Speaker 1: you should invest, and I had no idea about investing.
• 48:12
  Speaker 1: I was only twenty one years old, so he really
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: he really helped me to find my path in where
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: to invest that money. And so I slip the money
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: into two lots, so five thousand dollars, and I invested
• 48:25
  Speaker 1: five thousand into a managed fund and five thousand into
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: shares like the stock market. And then since then I
• 48:34
  Speaker 1: really haven't invested too much, just because I have fallen
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: off the wagon. But about twelve months ago I started
• 48:41
  Speaker 1: up a raise account, and what I'm doing is I'm
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: sort of accumulating about one thousand dollars and then once
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: I get to that, then I'm going to be putting
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: that into into buying shares. So I've got about nine
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: hundred at the moment, so I'm not too far off
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: creating my first parcel of a thousand dollars debt.
• 49:00
  Speaker 3: Let's learn a little bit more about her credit card
• 49:02
  Speaker 3: and personal loans.
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: So I've never had a credit card in my life. However,
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: I did go to university, so I do have about
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: a thirty eight thousand dollars.
• 49:12
  Speaker 3: Hex step And does she have any good money habits
• 49:15
  Speaker 3: that she's especially proud of?
• 49:16
  Speaker 1: So I've got two. Firstly, I sell all my unwanted
• 49:20
  Speaker 1: things on marketplace. As soon as there's something that I
• 49:24
  Speaker 1: don't use, I put it straight on Facebook Marketplace and
• 49:27
  Speaker 1: it usually sells quite quickly if you put it at
• 49:29
  Speaker 1: a decent price. And secondly, I bring my lunch to
• 49:33
  Speaker 1: work easily four out of five days a week. I
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: maybe treat myself like once a week once a fortnight
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: to to a lunch, a takeaway lunch, but otherwise I'm
• 49:43
  Speaker 1: bringing my lunch every day.
• 49:45
  Speaker 3: And what about her worst money habit.
• 49:47
  Speaker 1: I spend a lot of money on rent. So I
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: currently spend almost four hundred dollars a week on rent
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: because I do live by myself in Melbourne, so that's
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: something that I kind of value, and so I do see,
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: you know, the value in putting my money into that
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: because I really value my alone time and my space.
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: Another thing is I also buy a lot of plants
• 50:11
  Speaker 1: and home to core, which is really bad.
• 50:14
  Speaker 3: So what's today's money, dear is actually saving for what's
• 50:17
  Speaker 3: her big money goal.
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: I think for me, I definitely want to purchase a house.
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: I've lived in a few places now, and I just
• 50:25
  Speaker 1: would really love to be able to renovate a place.
• 50:27
  Speaker 1: I'm kind of in the design industry, so that kind
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: of means a lot to me to be able to
• 50:32
  Speaker 1: have your own space that you can create as your own,
• 50:35
  Speaker 1: and obviously renting doesn't allow that. Something that kind of
• 50:38
  Speaker 1: makes me fall off the bandwagon a bit is the
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: idea of house prices increasing and my savings not being
• 50:45
  Speaker 1: able to keep up with that. You know, the other day,
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: I sort of worked out how long it would take
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: me to afford a deposit on even just a one
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: bedroom home apartment, you know, in the city, and for me,
• 50:58
  Speaker 1: that's going to take at least five years, and that
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: kind of really puts me off a bit, and that
• 51:02
  Speaker 1: kind of knocks me back, and I sort of tend
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: to start from scratch from there. And also I guess
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: to do with that as well is seeing people around me.
• 51:10
  Speaker 1: You know, my brother and you know, comparing myself to
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: people who are currently purchasing their first property, and you know,
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: we're the same age, and I kind of think why
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: and I in that stage as well. So I think
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: definitely the idea of purchasing a property is high on
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: my list. But I do feel discouraged at times because
• 51:29
  Speaker 1: I feel like I can't keep up with people around me.
• 51:32
  Speaker 3: So how would today's money diarist write her own relationship
• 51:35
  Speaker 3: with money?
• 51:35
  Speaker 1: So I'd say about a year ago, if you had
• 51:38
  Speaker 1: to asked me that, I would have said probably a C.
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: But I think at the moment I'm probably an A minus.
• 51:45
  Speaker 1: I feel like I'm kind of across everything in terms
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: of you know, I've got my savings and I've invested
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: a bit, but I definitely have room to improve, particularly
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: around my mindset around money and you know, not comparing
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: myself to other people so much.
• 52:00
  Speaker 3: But yeah, i'd say, names Victoria, what did you make
• 52:03
  Speaker 3: of this week's money Diarist?
• 52:04
  Speaker 4: I really liked it. I felt like she was really
• 52:07
  Speaker 4: harsh on herself. Though I feel like a broken record.
• 52:09
  Speaker 4: I say that everyone feels harsh to yourselves.
• 52:10
  Speaker 3: Had okay.
• 52:11
  Speaker 4: She said that she compared herself to her friends a
• 52:13
  Speaker 4: lot and didn't feel like she had it together. And
• 52:15
  Speaker 4: then she's like, oh, and by the way, I've got
• 52:17
  Speaker 4: this in my savings, and I've you know, structured this,
• 52:19
  Speaker 4: and I even have an account for my cat, which
• 52:21
  Speaker 4: obviously I love. But I just felt like she had
• 52:24
  Speaker 4: it together. That's more than other people do, and so
• 52:28
  Speaker 4: much more than she's giving herself credit for.
• 52:30
  Speaker 3: I think I'm a similar age. I just turned twenty
• 52:33
  Speaker 3: six and on I have this conversation with my girlfriends
• 52:36
  Speaker 3: all the time. It's like, God, we are old. Now,
• 52:40
  Speaker 3: we're old, and we are not where we thought we
• 52:42
  Speaker 3: would be. Life is really hard, it's really expensive. She
• 52:46
  Speaker 3: said that she's not old.
• 52:47
  Speaker 5: By the way.
• 52:47
  Speaker 4: I'm just going to jump in there and be like,
• 52:49
  Speaker 4: are you kidding twenty six? I'm twenty nine now two
• 52:53
  Speaker 4: and that doesn't feel old either. What do you mean
• 52:55
  Speaker 4: halfway to fifty two?
• 52:56
  Speaker 5: That's halfway girl?
• 52:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, that is true.
• 52:58
  Speaker 5: Calm down.
• 52:59
  Speaker 3: But what I'm saying is that we're all gone through
• 53:01
  Speaker 3: it the same thing. But she did mention that she
• 53:04
  Speaker 3: spends four hundred dollars a week on rent, which in Melbourne,
• 53:07
  Speaker 3: I think that's really expensive, But she did say it
• 53:10
  Speaker 3: align to with values. She wants to live alone. I
• 53:13
  Speaker 3: get that. I've lived with some salty housemates in the.
• 53:16
  Speaker 5: Past, so I get it. I get it.
• 53:18
  Speaker 4: Guys. She lived with my little sister for a while.
• 53:20
  Speaker 5: So I don't know what that means.
• 53:22
  Speaker 4: Don't read too much into it, but I do agree,
• 53:25
  Speaker 4: and I think that that's a decision that she has
• 53:28
  Speaker 4: made consciously, and that's why I like it. As you know, Georgia,
• 53:32
  Speaker 4: I have absolutely no issue with what you spend. It's
• 53:35
  Speaker 4: that you are spending it, not just in line with
• 53:38
  Speaker 4: your values, but consciously, so that you are not just
• 53:40
  Speaker 4: making unconscious decisions and somehow you've ended up spending four
• 53:44
  Speaker 4: hundred dollars on rent. She was quite clear that was
• 53:46
  Speaker 4: something that she wanted to spend on and she's making
• 53:49
  Speaker 4: up for it in other places, and I think that
• 53:51
  Speaker 4: that's great. If you want to do that, you do you.
• 53:52
  Speaker 5: I loved that.
• 53:53
  Speaker 3: She also said she spends a lot of money on
• 53:55
  Speaker 3: her plants and home day care, which I also truly
• 53:59
  Speaker 3: responded to. I just felt like she was my people,
• 54:02
  Speaker 3: plants and a cat fund she really wants.
• 54:05
  Speaker 4: Does it get any better? Maybe it was my money there,
• 54:08
  Speaker 4: you guys know.
• 54:09
  Speaker 3: One last little question for you before we wrap up
• 54:12
  Speaker 3: the investing of the inheritance. Did you think that that
• 54:15
  Speaker 3: was a good idea.
• 54:15
  Speaker 4: I thought that was a great idea, and I really
• 54:17
  Speaker 4: liked that she got that guidance from her dad early on.
• 54:21
  Speaker 4: I really liked that she also clearly valued it as well.
• 54:24
  Speaker 4: She didn't know, and I really liked that she said that.
• 54:27
  Speaker 4: She's also kind of diversified a little bit further, and
• 54:30
  Speaker 4: she's recently got a micro investing platform Raise, which you know,
• 54:35
  Speaker 4: as a financial advisor, I can't say, oh, it's incredible,
• 54:37
  Speaker 4: it's this, it's that, But I know lots of people
• 54:40
  Speaker 4: in our community use it and really enjoy it, and
• 54:42
  Speaker 4: we do have a She's on the Money code for it.
• 54:44
  Speaker 4: If you guys are into it, I absolutely do. Okay,
• 54:47
  Speaker 4: so yeah, I think in some she's probably being a
• 54:49
  Speaker 4: little bit too harsh in herself and she's actually kill
• 54:51
  Speaker 4: on it. Yay, yay, alrighty that is all we have
• 54:55
  Speaker 4: time for today, guys.
• 54:56
  Speaker 3: But before we head off, let's quickly wrap the boring
• 54:58
  Speaker 3: but important stuff. The advice on She's on the Money
• 55:01
  Speaker 3: is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances.
• 55:04
  Speaker 3: She's on the money, it exists purely for educational purposes
• 55:07
  Speaker 3: and should not be relied upon to make an investment
• 55:10
  Speaker 3: or financial decision and stress less, we promised. Victoria Devine
• 55:14
  Speaker 3: is an authorized representative of Australia Pacific Funds Management Proprietary
• 55:18
  Speaker 3: Limited ABN three four one three two four six three
• 55:21
  Speaker 3: two five seven AFSL three three nine one five one
• 55:24
  Speaker 3: And as always, a massive shout out to our audio
• 55:27
  Speaker 3: lord Brian John for putting together today's podcast.
• 55:30
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• 55:32
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• 55:47
  Speaker 3: And what else happened recently progress.
• 55:49
  Speaker 4: We're also on YouTube now guys too, so so She's
• 55:52
  Speaker 4: on the Money AUS on YouTube and you'll find some fun,
• 55:55
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• 55:57
  Speaker 3: Podcast, all right, we'll see you next week.
• 55:59
  Speaker 5: See next week. Goes bye
• 56:11
  Speaker 1: M hm