Latest / Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot / The Unseen Advantage 4/7: You Already Know What To Do- But Guess Who's Not Listening? #TrustYourselfThursday

Transcript

The Unseen Advantage 4/7: You Already Know What To Do- But Guess Who's Not Listening? #TrustYourselfThursday · Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot

• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Greetings.
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Greetings, my friend, and welcome.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Welcome back to the sweet spot here on Trust Yourself Thursday.
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: I want to compliment you.
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: You've been with me all week walking through this journey of hidden revelations and man, are we getting insights?
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: Man, has this been helpful?
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: Wow, so beautiful souls.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: Welcome, you are doing just fine here on Trust Yourself Thursday.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: I'm Dr Derek Sweet.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: As you know, I'm a board-certified psychiatrist and I'm your guide also through this deep inner work we've been doing here on high performance the idea that when we make hidden connections, when we see the hidden connections, we are even more powerful in the purpose and the inner work that God is asking us to do every single day as we become more self-aware, more self-empowered and more able to overcome any obstacle or challenge that is put before us.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: So let me start here.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: If you've ever ignored your own yes, because you were scared, uncertain or waiting for permission, today's episode it's for you.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: Today we're not talking about confidence.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: That was yesterday.
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: If you didn't hear Win it All Wednesday yesterday, please go back and listen to the connected confidence part.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: Today we're talking about something deeper than confidence.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: It's Trust Yourself Thursday.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: So we're talking about self-trust, the kind that doesn't need applause, the kind that survives failure, the kind that whispers.
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: You know you gotta move.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: What is self-trust really?
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: Well, in my opinion, self-trust is the ability, the ability to hear your own voice over the noise.
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: Your ability to make a move without collecting 30 other opinions before you do something.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: Self-trust is the ability to know that, even if it goes sideways on you, you still got you.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: You have that level of confidence, that level of belief and that level of trust.
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: But here's the hidden revelation Self-trust rarely breaks in a single moment.
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: It erodes over time, very quietly.
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: If you're wondering, how is it that I lost the trust in myself?
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: Why do I waver or wobble every now and then?
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: It's because you've been disconnected.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: Slowly and very quietly and in a very sneaky way, your self-trust could be diluted.
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: Let's look at the brain science and make this real.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: Let's break this down simply when you trust yourself, three brain areas work together the prefrontal cortex, the insula and the amygdala.
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: You remember the prefrontal cortex.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: The ventromedial prefrontal cortex you remember this is the PFC.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: We talk about it all the time.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: This is the brain's CEO that helps you weigh decisions based on your values, not just logic or pressure.
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: This is the thinker part.
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: The insula we've talked about in the past.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: It tunes into your body's internal signals like your gut instinct, your heartbeat, your breathing.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: That's the I just know feeling.
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: I have a spidey sense inside of me feeling.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: That's the insula.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: And then, of course, the threat detector.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: We've talked about this a lot the amygdala.
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: It scans everything and it's looking for threats.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: It scans for If it thinks that the risk is too high, it'll hit the brakes on you, even if the move is the right move for you, and the amygdala gets a hold of you, it can stop you.
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: Here's what it feels like when self-trust breaks.
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: You actually feel the right answer, but your fear don't mess up, don't say anything, don't answer it.
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: You know the right move, but you stay in the cut, you don't say anything, you deny yourself.
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: That's not weakness, really.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: That's actually not.
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: That's just your inner circuitry glitching under pressure, trying to protect you.
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: That's all it is.
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: It's self-protection.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: So this is not about judgment.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: I'm not judging you at all.
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: We've all been there when we've pumped the brakes, when we know we had the right move in us.
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: But the good news is that you can retrain your brain.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: You can retrain these structures.
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: You can quiet the amygdala yes, you can.
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: But you have to know what's quietly eroding your self-trust.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: Let's name some of the hidden forces.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: A big one is comparison the thief that steals joy.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: That's what they call comparison Comparison.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: You see someone else win and you start doubting your own lane.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: Overthinking is another one.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: Overthinking you research everything and you trust nothing.
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: And when it's time to do something, you come up with more research.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: I'm guilty of that.
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: One another thing that quietly erodes self-trust is past pain.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: So one time you followed your gut and you got hurt.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: Now you don't trust anything.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: You don't even trust yourself, hesitate about everything.
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: Another one is outsourcing.
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: You stop checking in with yourself and you check in with everybody else, always needing the approval of somebody else.
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: And we all fall into this from time to time, needing that reassurance.
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: But if you let these hidden connections run the show, you'll get nothing done.
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: You really won't trust yourself.
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: Comparison, overthinking past pain and outsourcing over time what these things will do.
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: They'll blur your inner compass.
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: And maybe your inner compass isn't broken, but you just ignore it.
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: You're no longer going by what your inner compass is telling you what to do.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: And remember the word says the greater is that which is in you than whatever is in the world, but because of the hidden connections or disconnections, you don't have the revelations and, as a result, you don't trust yourself enough.
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: Let's look at the ancient wisdom.
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: Let's see what the ancient wisdom has to tell us.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: Remember Elijah?
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: He was a prophet, a bold, dramatic spiritual leader who stood up to corrupt kings back in the day.
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: One day, according to ancient wisdom, he called down fire from heaven.
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: In a spiritual showdown, he faced off against hundreds of false prophets, hundreds and he won.
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: It was one of those big public victories that cannot be denied.
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: And you know what happened to him immediately thereafter.
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: That happens to so many of us, after we've had a big victory.
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: He just collapsed.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: He just got drained emotionally, physically and spiritually, and he just ran away, just wanted to go hide in the cave somewhere and basically said God, I'm just done, I'm just done.
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: Have you ever been there?
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: You've put on some big event ever been there?
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: You've put on some big event, you've been on display, you nailed it, you did great.
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: But then afterwards you were just like spent, flabbergasted, whatever it is.
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: And in his story here's what happened.
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: God did not yell at him.
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: God didn't send like thunder to wake him up.
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: God didn't flex with fire or anything.
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: God visited him, but you know how he did it in a whisper, a gentle voice, a quiet voice, low, personal, and you know what it said you are not alone, I am still with you.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: You're not done yet.
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: I know I'm talking to somebody right now.
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: I don't know who you are exactly, but you needed to hear it that way.
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: You're not alone, I'm still with you and you're not done yet.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: Now, that's hidden revelation.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: Here's what the message is Even the strongest among us, doesn't matter how strong you are, people break and they have disappointments and they kind of lose it after a big win or big victory, or they've poured so much of themselves into something that they feel depleted.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and why is that?
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: Because we confuse performance with peace of mind.
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: They're not the same thing, because, say it with me, performance doesn't equal peace Period.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: Just because you deliver, it doesn't mean that you're okay.
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: Just because you crushed the meeting, you crushed the game, you hit the numbers, you made everybody happy, you came out on top, you gave the best speech, sermon talk ever, you held a family together.
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: Everybody was praising you and thought you were all that.
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: And the proverbial bag of chips doesn't mean that you don't get exhausted, you don't get anxious and, quietly, you don't fall apart.
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: The world rewards what you do, but your peace lives in who you are, when you're no longer performing.
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: See, that's the key.
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: When the applause fades and when the numbers have reset and everything goes back to zero and you're alone, you're spent, you're tied, you don't even know what to do next.
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: Well, who am I?
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: Sometimes students tell me after final exams they don't know what to do.
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: After they've studied so hard, they just don't know what it is to be human anymore.
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: You know what you have to do in those moments Before you let your trust be depleted.
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: Listen, listen for the whisper.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: That's how the restoration will begin.
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: That's how the restoration and the recuperation will begin.
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: It always starts with a whisper inside of you when you slow down to meditate, to pray, to reflect, to connect with the higher, the much higher, being the mystery that we call God.
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: Lauryn Hill put it this way Lauryn Hill, how are you going to win when you ain't right within?
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: That's not just self-worth talking, that's self-trust talking, real life, real life.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: If you're second-guessing yourself constantly, if you can't move without someone cosigning every move you make, you're not really broken, you're just kind of disconnected Self-trust returns when you start honoring what's already been planted in you and you reconnect to that power that's already in you.
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: There's a wonderful psychologist called Carl Jung.
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: He was the father of analytical psychology and he had a quote that I loved.
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: It said the privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: But how do you become that person?
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: You become that person by not mimicking anybody else.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: Don't be a copycat, don't look at anybody else and try to be them.
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: You become that person by not waiting until it's perfect for you to act.
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: You trust the rise and fall.
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: You recognize that life is not perfect, that you're going to mess up and that you know what you can.
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: Fall down seven but get up eight.
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: You become you by remembering what's true and acting like you believe it, starting right now.
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: So here's your internal playlist for today.
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: Remember that self-trust isn't taught, it's remembered.
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: Nobody has to teach you self-trust.
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: You have to remember you already had it.
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: It's just been layered under all the noise around you.
• 14:12
  Speaker 1: Slow down, get in a quiet space, remember all the little victories, all the little hurdles you've overcome, all the obstacles that you've dealt with and believe that Doubt can be very loud, doubt can be extremely loud, but you know what's louder than doubt Truth.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: Truth is steady.
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: When the world is screaming at you, tune into the quiet, the whisper, the truth that greater is he who is in me, greater is that which is in me than whatever is in the world.
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: That if God is for me, who can be against me?
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: You don't rebuild self-trust by being perfect, my friend.
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: You rebuild it by being honest.
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: The next move doesn't need to be flawless, it just needs to be faithful.
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: Your instincts are an ancient GPS.
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: Stop overriding them.
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: Let them lead the way.
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: Trust the path you are wired to walk.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: So here's what I want you to do today Take a minute and just be still.
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: Close your eyes, ask yourself what do I know?
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: What do I know deep in my spirit, deep in my soul, deep in my heart, that I've been ignoring?
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: Then breathe and listen, don't rush.
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: Breathe and listen and then act.
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: That's where trust comes back, not with noise, but with honoring the whisper.
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: So today, I don't want you to wait for data or wait for confirmation.
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: Do what your soul already knows.
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: Don't let fear be louder than your knowing.
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: The whisper you've been doubting.
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: That's the root of your roar.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for listening to the Sweet Spot.
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: I'm Dr Derek Sweet, and tomorrow we're going to be delving into Finish Strong Friday, because there are hidden connections and hidden revelations we need to explore that will help us overcome any hurdle and also get us to the finish line.
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: If you like what you heard today, please share it with someone that you care about, and if you haven't subscribed, I invite you to subscribe to this channel.
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: I'm Dr Eric Sweet.
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: Take care and I'll see you tomorrow.