Latest / The Reformed Tired Girls Club Podcast / All Healing and No Living Makes You a Tired Girl
Transcript
- Heather Copfer: Hi, you guys. Welcome back to the Reformed Tired Girls Club podcast. As you know, I am your host, hi Heather. And if you like this podcast episode, love the podcast as a whole, and want to like, comment, subscribe, leave me a review, you know, all of those good things that I always tell you helps me, helps the podcast out. I, per usual, appreciate it and appreciate you. So let's get into it. So, you know, starting this podcast. It was something that was on my mind for a really long time. I had thought about it constantly. I already had ideas just bubbling to the surface. I was always keeping notes in my notes app of things I wanted to talk about, things that were on my mind, my heart. And now that it's been a couple months of me doing this podcast, something that I didn't expect or really think would happen is I find myself sometimes after certain episodes or talking about certain subject matter. I feel a bit drained by it, you know, but would would which totally make sense because when we're talking about our traumas and we're reliving moments where our mental health was maybe at its lowest, and remembering the times where our health issues not only greatly impacted us, but people around us, you know, talking about all of this stuff. Of course, of course, it's going. To sometimes feel a bit draining. And, you know, that's why that's partly why I think this isn't, you know, talked about a lot casually. You know, it's not exactly dinner table conversation, if you will, maybe for some people. ⁓ but I feel like for most it isn't. So not only talking about heavy subject matter ⁓ at times, I've also still have been grieving and dealing with ⁓ my friend who passing and you know, some days it really hits me and I'm still dealing with those feelings and emotions and ⁓ some days a are a little bit harder, ⁓ other days are fine. So I also think that is played into me feeling drained at times. And you know, as much as we feel ready to unpack all of this stuff and and dive into the deep end and really, you know, have those Hard conversations and discuss those topics that, you know, are considered a little bit taboo. ⁓ people don't really know how to talk about it. We also have to acknowledge when our body is telling us to slow down and to rest and to take it easy and take it slow. And I can feel that. I can feel that. So I want to honor what my body is telling me and how I'm feeling and make this episode a little bit of a lighter one, a little bit of a not so heavy. One because in the midst of the chaos of life, whatever your personal chaos is, it can be so exhausting trying to improve 24-7, trying to be better 24-7, trying to strive for something greater 247. Do you know what I mean? Do you know what I'm talking about? I've got wrapped up in this mindset more times than I can even count because I am someone who I always want to be better. I always want to improve and find ways to improve and and be better than I was yesterday. You know, that's just how I'm wired. I've always been wired that way. And you know, I think that's why as well I've had such success with beating my depression, beating my narcolepsy and my chronic acne, and overcoming a lot of health issues and continuing to come ⁓ overcome a lot of health issues. I'm just wired that way and I know things can always be better. And you know, ⁓ it was funny one time ⁓ an astrologer when she was looking at my natal birth chart, she had mentioned that as well. And I was like, great, it's good to know that that is literally written in the stars for me. But in instinctively and intuitively, like I've always known that's just that's just me. That's just who I am. That's just how I operate in this world. But sometimes it gets exhausting. Trying 24 7 to work through our trauma and to improve our chronic health conditions 24-7 can get really exhausting, which is why I've always preached that small, consistent changes really do move the needle over time in the long term rather than going balls to the walls right away because that stuff doesn't stick. Have you ever tried that where you're like, ⁓ I'm gonna try the 75 hard or I'm going to starting tomorrow? Never gonna eat out, never going to get fast food, and I'm only gonna cook homemade meals and I'm gonna start working out five days a week starting today and it just doesn't stick because it's not realistic and it's not small tweaks. Those are like big changes, big drastic changes immediately. Really the magic is when you are making those small changes continuously. And you know, guys, life is meant to be lived. I think we forget about that sometimes. Because, you know, life is chaotic. We're always it's it's not not that we're always stressed, but stress is not a foreign emotion to most of us. And I think sometimes we get so caught up in our lives on what is wrong, what is not going right, that we forget to embrace the good and what we can appreciate, what we can have gratitude for, because our mind always wants to go to the negative and we have to actively remember and practice remembering the good. And remembering to celebrate and and to take those times to enjoy our lives. And look, I know this also really largely depends on your circumstance. I always, I always think back to Maslow's hierarchy of needs. ⁓ you know, if you're not familiar with what that is, it's basically a pyramid of different layers of human needs. And essentially, we need to meet each level before we can move on to the next level. And you know, that very first level is our physiological level. needs, right? Water, shelter, sleep, food, sex. And you know, if we don't have those basic physiological needs met, it's really, really hard to move up the pyramid and to have those other needs met, like love and belonging, you have self-actualization, self-esteem, you know, all that good stuff. If you never heard of Maslow's hierarchy of needs, check it out. It's a little I think it's interesting. So I do want to acknowledge that this is very nuanced, right? Like Sure, if you're somebody who you are you don't have access to the best food quality, you live in a food desert, or you're someone who struggles to pay rent and isn't financially stable for whatever reason, those are immediate physiological needs that take precedent over everything else. But you know, when I find myself feeling very overwhelmed and drained and a little burnt out, I always end up in this position where I'm just laying flat on my back, just staring up at the ceiling. And I'm just letting my brain run because I'm someone who when my brain is just like constantly go, go, go, go, go, go like thinking, thinking, thinking, my aura ring data shows that I'm like really, really, really stressed. And so I just get to a point where I'm just crashed out on the ground, just on my back, just staring up at the ceiling. And I'm like, I can't do this anymore. I need a break. And you know, some little things that also bring me joy is If it's a beautiful day out, I like to just go outside and look up at the sky and just admire how blue and pretty it is. ⁓ you know, sometimes it's not always clear blue skies here in New York, but when it is, I love to just go outside, maybe ground, get my feet in some grass, and just stare up at the sky. I love to read a good book. If I can be in bed an hour before I need to go to sleep and I'm just reading a fiction book, I am so happy. I'm so happy. And books are pretty tooth. Books are pretty cheap. I pay like $10 for a paperback book on Amazon like all the time. I also really like to sing. I like to dance. I like to move my body. So, you know, there's always free things that we can do to loosen up, to be enjoying ourselves in the present moment. It doesn't always have to be spending money. And that's really what I'm trying to do right now and trying to focus on and have a little bit of a lighter episode today. ⁓ I did have an idea that I will carry over into next week that we will talk about. But I just wanna let you know and if give you permission that if you're feeling really drained right now and you just feel like twenty four seven you're just trying to improve and be better, that it's okay to slow down, slow down, take a minute, take an hour to just breathe. Breathe at the very least, just sit for five minutes and just breathe. I love a good box breathing sesh. Love alternate nostril breathing. And you'd be surprised how much better you feel after a couple minutes of doing simple breath work like that. And just know that hopefully life is long and you gotta take not to sound cheesy. It's kinda cheesy, but you gotta take some time to stop and smell the roses, smell the grass, take a beat. Life's hard enough. Make sure you find some time to to just try to relax. Try to relax. Try to find some joy. Try to even Give yourself some positive affirmations and some positive self-talk. That's another thing. Where we we tend to talk negatively to ourselves and about ourselves. And our body listens. Our body listens. So even if it's to stop and take a second to be like, thank you, body, for carrying me through these really hard times. I know you're doing your best and I appreciate you for it. Thank you. Your body hears that. Your body listens to that. So Again, a little bit of a lighter kind of nothing super specific episode, but I just want to thank y'all for tuning in to another episode of the Reformed Tard Girls Club podcast. I appreciate you being here. And I will see you next week for that topic that I had in mind.