Latest / Adult Child of Dysfunction / E315: You Are Not the Problem: Healing Childhood Trauma, Nervous System Regulation & Breaking Survival Patterns with Lori Montry

Transcript

E315: You Are Not the Problem: Healing Childhood Trauma, Nervous System Regulation & Breaking Survival Patterns with Lori Montry · Adult Child of Dysfunction

• 0:07
  Hello,
• 0:07
  everybody,
• 0:08
  and
• 0:08
  welcome
• 0:08
  back
• 0:08
  to
• 0:08
  another
• 0:09
  episode
• 0:09
  of
• 0:09
  Adult
• 0:09
  Child
• 0:10
  of
• 0:10
  Dysfunction.
• 0:11
  Today
• 0:11
  we
• 0:11
  have
• 0:12
  with
• 0:12
  us
• 0:12
  Lori
• 0:12
  Montre.
• 0:13
  And
• 0:14
  I
• 0:14
  am
• 0:14
  just
• 0:14
  going
• 0:14
  to
• 0:15
  let
• 0:15
  her
• 0:15
  jump
• 0:15
  right
• 0:16
  in,
• 0:16
  introduce
• 0:16
  herself,
• 0:17
  and
• 0:17
  I
• 0:18
  just
• 0:18
  want
• 0:18
  to
• 0:18
  say
• 0:18
  welcome,
• 0:19
  Lori.
• 0:20
  Thank
• 0:20
  you,
• 0:20
  Tammy.
• 0:21
  I
• 0:21
  appreciate
• 0:22
  being
• 0:22
  here.
• 0:22
  I
• 0:23
  recently
• 0:23
  got
• 0:23
  to
• 0:24
  know
• 0:24
  your
• 0:24
  podcast
• 0:25
  a
• 0:25
  little
• 0:25
  bit
• 0:25
  and
• 0:25
  what
• 0:26
  a
• 0:26
  beautiful
• 0:26
  place
• 0:26
  you've
• 0:27
  created
• 0:27
  here
• 0:28
  in
• 0:28
  the
• 0:28
  world
• 0:28
  for.
• 0:29
  For
• 0:29
  all
• 0:29
  of
• 0:29
  us
• 0:29
  to
• 0:30
  come
• 0:30
  and
• 0:30
  remember
• 0:31
  that,
• 0:31
  you
• 0:31
  know,
• 0:32
  our
• 0:32
  past
• 0:32
  doesn't
• 0:33
  have
• 0:33
  to
• 0:33
  define
• 0:34
  who
• 0:34
  we
• 0:34
  are
• 0:34
  in
• 0:35
  our
• 0:35
  future.
• 0:36
  So
• 0:36
  as
• 0:36
  far
• 0:36
  as,
• 0:37
  you
• 0:37
  know,
• 0:37
  who
• 0:37
  am
• 0:37
  I
• 0:38
  and
• 0:38
  what
• 0:38
  do
• 0:38
  I
• 0:39
  do?
• 0:39
  You
• 0:39
  know,
• 0:40
  I
• 0:40
  was
• 0:40
  somebody
• 0:40
  who
• 0:41
  really
• 0:42
  struggled
• 0:42
  with
• 0:43
  my
• 0:43
  sense
• 0:43
  of.
• 0:44
  Of
• 0:44
  being
• 0:44
  worthy
• 0:45
  and
• 0:46
  capable
• 0:46
  in
• 0:46
  the
• 0:47
  world.
• 0:47
  And
• 0:48
  I
• 0:48
  struggled
• 0:49
  most
• 0:49
  especially
• 0:50
  with
• 0:50
  my
• 0:50
  relationship
• 0:51
  with
• 0:51
  food
• 0:52
  for
• 0:52
  about
• 0:52
  35
• 0:53
  years.
• 0:53
  Emotional
• 0:53
  eating,
• 0:54
  binge
• 0:54
  eating,
• 0:54
  over
• 0:55
  exercising,
• 0:56
  pretty
• 0:56
  much
• 0:56
  anything
• 0:57
  that
• 0:57
  can
• 0:57
  be
• 0:57
  done
• 0:57
  with
• 0:57
  food,
• 0:58
  I.
• 0:59
  I
• 0:59
  was
• 0:59
  on
• 1:00
  that
• 1:00
  pathway.
• 1:01
  And
• 1:02
  when
• 1:02
  I
• 1:03
  finally
• 1:04
  started
• 1:04
  to
• 1:04
  realize
• 1:05
  what
• 1:05
  was
• 1:06
  actually
• 1:06
  behind
• 1:07
  my
• 1:07
  patterns
• 1:08
  with
• 1:08
  food
• 1:08
  and
• 1:09
  all
• 1:09
  of
• 1:09
  my
• 1:09
  other
• 1:10
  patterns,
• 1:10
  the
• 1:10
  root
• 1:11
  of
• 1:11
  those
• 1:11
  challenges,
• 1:12
  when
• 1:12
  I
• 1:12
  finally
• 1:13
  started
• 1:14
  to
• 1:14
  understand
• 1:15
  that
• 1:15
  and
• 1:16
  started
• 1:16
  to
• 1:16
  put
• 1:17
  together
• 1:17
  what
• 1:18
  I
• 1:18
  needed
• 1:18
  to
• 1:18
  heal,
• 1:19
  I
• 1:19
  thought
• 1:20
  to
• 1:20
  myself,
• 1:20
  I've
• 1:21
  got
• 1:21
  to
• 1:21
  do
• 1:21
  this
• 1:21
  in
• 1:22
  my
• 1:22
  life.
• 1:22
  That's
• 1:23
  when
• 1:23
  I
• 1:23
  decided
• 1:23
  to
• 1:24
  leave
• 1:24
  my
• 1:24
  practice
• 1:25
  as
• 1:25
  a
• 1:25
  corporate
• 1:25
  lawyer
• 1:26
  and
• 1:27
  go
• 1:27
  into
• 1:27
  this
• 1:28
  work
• 1:28
  full
• 1:28
  time,
• 1:29
  training
• 1:29
  myself,
• 1:30
  getting
• 1:30
  educated,
• 1:30
  and
• 1:31
  really
• 1:31
  understanding
• 1:33
  our
• 1:33
  patterns
• 1:33
  and
• 1:33
  why
• 1:34
  we
• 1:34
  do
• 1:34
  what
• 1:34
  we
• 1:34
  do.
• 1:34
  And
• 1:35
  it
• 1:35
  has
• 1:35
  led
• 1:35
  me
• 1:35
  to,
• 1:36
  not
• 1:36
  only
• 1:37
  to
• 1:37
  the
• 1:37
  work
• 1:37
  that
• 1:37
  I
• 1:37
  do,
• 1:38
  but
• 1:38
  I've
• 1:38
  just
• 1:38
  completed
• 1:39
  my
• 1:39
  first
• 1:40
  solo
• 1:40
  book
• 1:41
  project,
• 1:41
  which
• 1:41
  is
• 1:42
  called
• 1:42
  you're
• 1:42
  not
• 1:43
  the
• 1:43
  Problem.
• 1:43
  And
• 1:44
  it
• 1:44
  really
• 1:44
  dives
• 1:45
  into
• 1:46
  understanding
• 1:47
  and
• 1:47
  explaining
• 1:49
  our
• 1:49
  behaviors,
• 1:50
  you
• 1:50
  know,
• 1:50
  these
• 1:50
  behaviors
• 1:51
  that
• 1:51
  we
• 1:51
  think,
• 1:51
  like,
• 1:51
  why
• 1:52
  do
• 1:52
  I
• 1:52
  do
• 1:52
  that?
• 1:52
  Why
• 1:53
  can't
• 1:53
  I
• 1:53
  get
• 1:53
  my
• 1:53
  shit
• 1:54
  together?
• 1:54
  Why?
• 1:54
  Whatever
• 1:55
  it
• 1:55
  is,
• 1:55
  you
• 1:56
  know,
• 1:56
  there's
• 1:56
  a
• 1:57
  reason
• 1:57
  for
• 1:57
  it.
• 1:58
  And
• 1:58
  it
• 1:58
  stems
• 1:58
  back
• 1:59
  to
• 1:59
  the
• 1:59
  adaptations
• 2:00
  that
• 2:00
  we
• 2:00
  made
• 2:00
  in
• 2:00
  response
• 2:01
  to
• 2:01
  our
• 2:02
  childhood
• 2:02
  experiences.
• 2:03
  And
• 2:04
  when
• 2:04
  we
• 2:04
  look
• 2:04
  at
• 2:04
  it
• 2:05
  from
• 2:05
  that
• 2:05
  lens,
• 2:05
  we
• 2:06
  can
• 2:06
  become
• 2:06
  curious
• 2:06
  about
• 2:07
  it,
• 2:07
  and
• 2:07
  then
• 2:07
  we
• 2:07
  can
• 2:08
  give
• 2:08
  ourselves
• 2:09
  the
• 2:09
  conditions
• 2:09
  we
• 2:09
  need
• 2:10
  to
• 2:10
  adapt
• 2:10
  again
• 2:11
  rather
• 2:11
  than
• 2:12
  staying
• 2:12
  stuck
• 2:13
  in
• 2:13
  adaptations
• 2:14
  that
• 2:14
  no
• 2:15
  longer
• 2:15
  serve
• 2:15
  us.
• 2:16
  And
• 2:16
  I
• 2:16
  love
• 2:17
  that
• 2:17
  you
• 2:17
  talk
• 2:17
  about
• 2:18
  just
• 2:19
  the
• 2:19
  fact
• 2:19
  that
• 2:20
  you
• 2:20
  think,
• 2:21
  that
• 2:21
  you
• 2:21
  think
• 2:22
  logically,
• 2:22
  we
• 2:23
  know.
• 2:23
  And
• 2:23
  even
• 2:24
  if
• 2:24
  we
• 2:24
  go
• 2:24
  through
• 2:24
  therapy,
• 2:25
  you
• 2:25
  can
• 2:25
  go
• 2:25
  to
• 2:25
  therapy
• 2:25
  for
• 2:26
  10
• 2:26
  years,
• 2:26
  and
• 2:26
  logically,
• 2:27
  you
• 2:27
  know,
• 2:27
  they'll
• 2:27
  say,
• 2:28
  well,
• 2:28
  this
• 2:28
  is
• 2:28
  why
• 2:28
  you
• 2:28
  do
• 2:29
  this
• 2:29
  and
• 2:29
  this
• 2:29
  is
• 2:29
  why
• 2:29
  you
• 2:29
  do
• 2:30
  this.
• 2:30
  But
• 2:30
  it's.
• 2:30
  It's
• 2:30
  not
• 2:31
  enough.
• 2:31
  It's
• 2:31
  not
• 2:31
  enough
• 2:32
  being
• 2:32
  aware
• 2:32
  of
• 2:33
  why
• 2:33
  you
• 2:33
  need
• 2:34
  to
• 2:34
  dig
• 2:34
  down
• 2:34
  and
• 2:35
  pull
• 2:35
  it
• 2:36
  out
• 2:36
  of
• 2:36
  that
• 2:36
  root.
• 2:37
  And,
• 2:37
  you
• 2:38
  know,
• 2:38
  it's
• 2:38
  like
• 2:38
  pulling
• 2:39
  a
• 2:39
  weed
• 2:39
  out
• 2:39
  at
• 2:39
  the
• 2:39
  root.
• 2:40
  You
• 2:40
  got
• 2:40
  to
• 2:40
  get
• 2:40
  all
• 2:40
  the
• 2:41
  way
• 2:41
  down
• 2:41
  there
• 2:41
  to
• 2:41
  all
• 2:42
  of
• 2:42
  that
• 2:42
  subconscious
• 2:43
  stuff,
• 2:43
  and
• 2:43
  I'm
• 2:43
  assure
• 2:44
  that's
• 2:44
  what
• 2:44
  you're,
• 2:44
  you
• 2:44
  know,
• 2:44
  with
• 2:45
  the
• 2:45
  beliefs
• 2:45
  and
• 2:45
  the
• 2:45
  patterns.
• 2:46
  I
• 2:47
  know
• 2:47
  I
• 2:47
  shouldn't
• 2:48
  be
• 2:48
  like
• 2:48
  this,
• 2:48
  and
• 2:48
  I
• 2:48
  know
• 2:49
  why
• 2:49
  I
• 2:49
  am
• 2:49
  like
• 2:49
  this,
• 2:50
  but
• 2:50
  I
• 2:50
  still
• 2:51
  do
• 2:51
  it.
• 2:51
  I
• 2:52
  still.
• 2:52
  People,
• 2:53
  please.
• 2:53
  I
• 2:53
  still
• 2:55
  cringe
• 2:55
  when
• 2:55
  I,
• 2:56
  when
• 2:56
  I
• 2:57
  want
• 2:57
  to
• 2:57
  do
• 2:57
  something
• 2:57
  and
• 2:58
  can't
• 2:58
  do
• 2:58
  it.
• 2:58
  And
• 2:59
  talk
• 2:59
  a
• 2:59
  little
• 3:00
  bit
• 3:00
  about
• 3:00
  that.
• 3:00
  Like
• 3:00
  what?
• 3:01
  Well,
• 3:01
  let's
• 3:02
  first
• 3:02
  go
• 3:02
  back.
• 3:02
  I'm
• 3:03
  gonna
• 3:03
  go
• 3:03
  back
• 3:03
  a
• 3:03
  little
• 3:03
  bit
• 3:04
  because
• 3:04
  they
• 3:04
  don't
• 3:04
  really
• 3:05
  know
• 3:05
  your
• 3:05
  story.
• 3:06
  You,
• 3:06
  you
• 3:07
  had
• 3:07
  the
• 3:07
  problems
• 3:07
  with
• 3:07
  the
• 3:08
  eating.
• 3:09
  So
• 3:09
  did
• 3:09
  that
• 3:09
  stem
• 3:10
  from
• 3:10
  trauma
• 3:11
  as
• 3:11
  a
• 3:11
  child?
• 3:11
  Like,
• 3:12
  was
• 3:12
  that
• 3:12
  your
• 3:12
  comfort
• 3:13
  food?
• 3:13
  Like,
• 3:13
  was
• 3:13
  food
• 3:14
  your
• 3:14
  comfort?
• 3:14
  Was
• 3:14
  that
• 3:15
  your
• 3:15
  escape?
• 3:15
  Or
• 3:16
  how
• 3:16
  did
• 3:16
  that
• 3:16
  start?
• 3:17
  Yeah,
• 3:18
  so
• 3:19
  I
• 3:19
  was
• 3:20
  the
• 3:20
  sixth
• 3:21
  out
• 3:21
  of
• 3:21
  seven
• 3:21
  children.
• 3:22
  So
• 3:22
  when
• 3:22
  I
• 3:23
  arrived
• 3:23
  on
• 3:23
  the
• 3:23
  scene,
• 3:24
  my,
• 3:24
  There
• 3:25
  was
• 3:25
  plenty
• 3:25
  going
• 3:26
  on.
• 3:26
  My
• 3:26
  mom
• 3:27
  was
• 3:28
  doing
• 3:28
  her
• 3:29
  best,
• 3:29
  but
• 3:29
  she
• 3:30
  was
• 3:30
  very
• 3:30
  overwhelmed,
• 3:31
  come
• 3:31
  from
• 3:31
  a
• 3:32
  traumatic
• 3:32
  background
• 3:33
  herself.
• 3:34
  And
• 3:35
  really
• 3:35
  I,
• 3:36
  I
• 3:36
  really
• 3:36
  had
• 3:36
  the
• 3:36
  sense
• 3:37
  from,
• 3:37
  from
• 3:38
  my
• 3:38
  earliest,
• 3:38
  earliest
• 3:39
  time
• 3:39
  that
• 3:39
  I
• 3:39
  was
• 3:39
  a
• 3:39
  burden
• 3:40
  in,
• 3:40
  in
• 3:40
  my
• 3:40
  home,
• 3:41
  I
• 3:41
  was
• 3:41
  another
• 3:42
  mouth
• 3:42
  to
• 3:42
  feed.
• 3:43
  And,
• 3:43
  and
• 3:44
  it
• 3:44
  was
• 3:44
  clear,
• 3:45
  you
• 3:45
  know,
• 3:45
  that,
• 3:45
  that
• 3:46
  I
• 3:46
  stretched
• 3:47
  my
• 3:47
  caregivers
• 3:48
  very
• 3:49
  thin.
• 3:49
  And
• 3:50
  then
• 3:50
  around
• 3:51
  age
• 3:51
  four,
• 3:51
  I
• 3:52
  was
• 3:52
  sexually
• 3:52
  abused
• 3:52
  for
• 3:53
  a
• 3:53
  time,
• 3:54
  for
• 3:54
  about
• 3:54
  six
• 3:54
  months
• 3:55
  as
• 3:55
  a
• 3:55
  four
• 3:55
  year
• 3:55
  old.
• 3:56
  And
• 3:57
  I
• 3:57
  had
• 3:57
  nowhere
• 3:58
  to
• 3:58
  turn.
• 3:58
  And,
• 3:59
  you
• 3:59
  know,
• 3:59
  I
• 3:59
  couldn't
• 4:00
  turn
• 4:00
  to,
• 4:00
  to
• 4:01
  my
• 4:01
  mother.
• 4:01
  She,
• 4:01
  she
• 4:02
  already,
• 4:02
  you
• 4:02
  know,
• 4:02
  I
• 4:03
  was
• 4:03
  afraid
• 4:03
  of
• 4:03
  her
• 4:03
  reaction.
• 4:04
  My
• 4:04
  abuser
• 4:04
  told
• 4:05
  me
• 4:05
  it
• 4:05
  was
• 4:05
  my
• 4:05
  fault.
• 4:06
  If
• 4:06
  I
• 4:06
  told
• 4:06
  anyone,
• 4:07
  I
• 4:07
  would
• 4:07
  get
• 4:07
  in
• 4:07
  trouble.
• 4:08
  And
• 4:09
  so
• 4:09
  I
• 4:09
  just
• 4:09
  locked
• 4:10
  that
• 4:10
  away.
• 4:10
  I
• 4:10
  didn't
• 4:11
  know
• 4:11
  what
• 4:11
  to
• 4:11
  do
• 4:11
  with
• 4:11
  it.
• 4:12
  I
• 4:12
  got
• 4:12
  very,
• 4:13
  very
• 4:13
  skilled
• 4:14
  at
• 4:14
  disassociation
• 4:15
  and
• 4:16
  just,
• 4:16
  you
• 4:16
  know,
• 4:16
  going
• 4:17
  into
• 4:17
  freeze
• 4:18
  and
• 4:18
  not
• 4:19
  really
• 4:19
  being
• 4:19
  there.
• 4:20
  And
• 4:20
  I
• 4:20
  needed
• 4:21
  something
• 4:21
  though,
• 4:22
  right?
• 4:22
  Right.
• 4:22
  I
• 4:22
  needed
• 4:22
  comfort,
• 4:23
  I
• 4:23
  needed
• 4:23
  soothing.
• 4:24
  I
• 4:24
  needed
• 4:25
  something
• 4:25
  to
• 4:26
  quiet
• 4:26
  the
• 4:27
  noise
• 4:27
  inside
• 4:28
  my
• 4:28
  body.
• 4:28
  And
• 4:29
  that's
• 4:29
  when
• 4:29
  I
• 4:30
  started
• 4:30
  turning
• 4:31
  to
• 4:31
  food.
• 4:31
  I
• 4:32
  mean,
• 4:32
  it
• 4:32
  was
• 4:32
  available,
• 4:33
  it
• 4:33
  worked,
• 4:34
  and
• 4:34
  it
• 4:35
  really,
• 4:35
  it
• 4:35
  made
• 4:35
  a
• 4:35
  lot
• 4:35
  of
• 4:36
  sense.
• 4:36
  And
• 4:36
  so
• 4:37
  from
• 4:37
  about
• 4:37
  the
• 4:38
  age
• 4:38
  of
• 4:38
  four
• 4:38
  or
• 4:38
  five,
• 4:39
  I
• 4:39
  started
• 4:40
  using
• 4:40
  food.
• 4:41
  And
• 4:41
  it
• 4:41
  had
• 4:42
  nothing
• 4:42
  to
• 4:42
  do
• 4:42
  with
• 4:42
  hunger
• 4:43
  or
• 4:43
  physical
• 4:43
  need.
• 4:44
  It
• 4:45
  was
• 4:45
  truly
• 4:46
  my
• 4:46
  emotional
• 4:47
  support,
• 4:47
  something
• 4:47
  I
• 4:48
  could
• 4:48
  turn
• 4:48
  to
• 4:48
  without
• 4:49
  having
• 4:49
  to
• 4:49
  ask,
• 4:50
  without
• 4:51
  feeling
• 4:52
  bad.
• 4:52
  But
• 4:52
  the
• 4:52
  thing
• 4:53
  about
• 4:53
  trauma
• 4:53
  and
• 4:54
  about
• 4:54
  experiences
• 4:55
  is
• 4:55
  that
• 4:56
  it's,
• 4:56
  yes,
• 4:57
  about
• 4:57
  the,
• 4:58
  the
• 4:59
  events
• 4:59
  themselves
• 5:00
  to
• 5:00
  some
• 5:01
  degree,
• 5:01
  but
• 5:01
  more
• 5:02
  so
• 5:02
  what
• 5:02
  gets
• 5:03
  built
• 5:03
  on
• 5:03
  them.
• 5:03
  Right.
• 5:04
  Because
• 5:04
  those,
• 5:04
  those
• 5:05
  experiences
• 5:06
  changed
• 5:07
  the
• 5:07
  way
• 5:07
  I
• 5:07
  saw
• 5:07
  myself,
• 5:08
  changed
• 5:09
  the
• 5:09
  way
• 5:09
  I
• 5:09
  saw
• 5:09
  the
• 5:09
  world,
• 5:10
  changed
• 5:11
  the
• 5:11
  way
• 5:11
  I
• 5:11
  saw
• 5:11
  other
• 5:12
  people.
• 5:13
  And
• 5:13
  so
• 5:13
  I
• 5:13
  built
• 5:13
  an
• 5:14
  entire
• 5:14
  life
• 5:15
  based
• 5:15
  on
• 5:16
  that
• 5:16
  framework.
• 5:17
  And
• 5:18
  it
• 5:18
  was,
• 5:19
  you
• 5:19
  know,
• 5:19
  a
• 5:19
  life
• 5:20
  based
• 5:20
  on
• 5:20
  adaptations.
• 5:21
  It
• 5:21
  wasn't
• 5:22
  who
• 5:22
  I
• 5:22
  was
• 5:22
  or
• 5:23
  what
• 5:23
  I
• 5:23
  needed.
• 5:23
  Or,
• 5:24
  or,
• 5:24
  you
• 5:24
  know
• 5:25
  what?
• 5:25
  I.
• 5:25
  What
• 5:26
  tired.
• 5:26
  It
• 5:26
  was
• 5:26
  entirely
• 5:27
  based
• 5:28
  on
• 5:29
  the
• 5:29
  experiences
• 5:30
  that
• 5:30
  I,
• 5:31
  That
• 5:31
  I
• 5:31
  had
• 5:32
  as
• 5:32
  a.
• 5:32
  As
• 5:32
  a
• 5:32
  young
• 5:32
  one.
• 5:33
  Yeah.
• 5:33
  It
• 5:34
  was
• 5:34
  literally
• 5:34
  adapting
• 5:35
  in
• 5:35
  order
• 5:35
  to
• 5:36
  survive.
• 5:36
  Yeah.
• 5:37
  And,
• 5:38
  and,
• 5:39
  and
• 5:39
  it's
• 5:39
  amazing
• 5:39
  for
• 5:40
  the
• 5:40
  people
• 5:40
  listening.
• 5:40
  You've
• 5:41
  probably
• 5:41
  heard
• 5:41
  us
• 5:41
  talk
• 5:41
  about
• 5:41
  it
• 5:42
  before
• 5:42
  on
• 5:42
  this
• 5:42
  podcast
• 5:43
  up
• 5:43
  until
• 5:43
  about
• 5:43
  the
• 5:44
  age
• 5:44
  of
• 5:44
  seven,
• 5:44
  you're
• 5:45
  basically
• 5:45
  in
• 5:45
  this
• 5:45
  completely
• 5:46
  moldable,
• 5:47
  semi
• 5:48
  hypnotic,
• 5:48
  like,
• 5:49
  there's
• 5:49
  not
• 5:49
  a
• 5:49
  lot
• 5:49
  of
• 5:49
  processing.
• 5:50
  Like,
• 5:50
  the
• 5:51
  fact
• 5:51
  that
• 5:51
  you
• 5:51
  can
• 5:51
  look
• 5:52
  back
• 5:52
  now
• 5:52
  and
• 5:52
  go,
• 5:52
  When
• 5:53
  I
• 5:53
  was
• 5:53
  4,
• 5:53
  I
• 5:53
  didn't
• 5:54
  have
• 5:54
  anybody
• 5:54
  to
• 5:54
  turn
• 5:55
  to
• 5:56
  at
• 5:56
  4.
• 5:57
  You
• 5:57
  didn't
• 5:57
  process
• 5:58
  that.
• 5:58
  You
• 5:59
  didn't.
• 5:59
  You
• 5:59
  just,
• 6:00
  you
• 6:01
  reached
• 6:01
  out
• 6:01
  for
• 6:01
  mommy,
• 6:02
  I'm
• 6:02
  sure.
• 6:03
  But
• 6:03
  then
• 6:03
  you
• 6:03
  got
• 6:04
  that
• 6:04
  get
• 6:04
  away,
• 6:04
  I
• 6:04
  can't
• 6:05
  be
• 6:05
  bothered
• 6:05
  kind
• 6:05
  of
• 6:05
  attitude.
• 6:06
  And,
• 6:07
  and
• 6:07
  it's
• 6:08
  amazing
• 6:09
  how
• 6:09
  quickly,
• 6:10
  like,
• 6:10
  you
• 6:10
  were
• 6:10
  talking
• 6:10
  about,
• 6:11
  like,
• 6:11
  like
• 6:11
  what
• 6:12
  happened
• 6:12
  to
• 6:12
  you
• 6:12
  at
• 6:12
  four
• 6:13
  is
• 6:13
  a
• 6:13
  huge,
• 6:15
  huge
• 6:15
  thing.
• 6:16
  And
• 6:16
  if
• 6:17
  you
• 6:17
  cannot
• 6:19
  get
• 6:19
  that
• 6:20
  and
• 6:20
  deal
• 6:20
  with
• 6:21
  that
• 6:21
  and
• 6:21
  process
• 6:21
  that,
• 6:22
  I
• 6:22
  mean,
• 6:23
  that
• 6:23
  carried
• 6:23
  with
• 6:23
  you
• 6:23
  until
• 6:24
  how
• 6:24
  old?
• 6:25
  Yeah,
• 6:25
  I
• 6:26
  mean,
• 6:27
  man,
• 6:27
  I
• 6:28
  kind
• 6:28
  of
• 6:28
  use
• 6:28
  my.
• 6:29
  Right
• 6:29
  around
• 6:30
  turning
• 6:30
  40
• 6:31
  as
• 6:31
  my
• 6:31
  time
• 6:32
  when
• 6:32
  I
• 6:32
  could,
• 6:33
  could
• 6:34
  be
• 6:34
  in
• 6:34
  life
• 6:34
  and
• 6:35
  think,
• 6:35
  okay,
• 6:36
  I'm
• 6:36
  doing
• 6:36
  pretty
• 6:36
  well.
• 6:37
  I
• 6:37
  think
• 6:37
  I've.
• 6:38
  I
• 6:38
  really
• 6:38
  have
• 6:38
  a
• 6:38
  handle
• 6:39
  on,
• 6:39
  you
• 6:39
  know,
• 6:39
  the
• 6:39
  understanding
• 6:40
  and,
• 6:40
  and
• 6:41
  have
• 6:41
  the
• 6:41
  tools
• 6:41
  that
• 6:42
  I
• 6:42
  need.
• 6:42
  But,
• 6:43
  you
• 6:43
  know,
• 6:43
  so
• 6:43
  35
• 6:44
  years
• 6:45
  of
• 6:46
  intense
• 6:47
  struggle
• 6:47
  with
• 6:47
  myself
• 6:48
  and
• 6:49
  believing
• 6:49
  that
• 6:49
  I
• 6:49
  was
• 6:50
  the
• 6:50
  problem.
• 6:51
  Absolutely.
• 6:51
  And
• 6:52
  just
• 6:52
  not
• 6:52
  worthiness.
• 6:53
  And
• 6:53
  I
• 6:53
  say
• 6:53
  that
• 6:53
  for
• 6:53
  everybody
• 6:54
  listening
• 6:54
  to
• 6:54
  this
• 6:55
  podcast,
• 6:55
  that
• 6:55
  is
• 6:55
  the
• 6:56
  underlying
• 6:56
  belief
• 6:56
  at
• 6:57
  the
• 6:57
  root
• 6:57
  of
• 6:57
  everything.
• 6:58
  It's
• 6:59
  that
• 6:59
  you're
• 6:59
  just
• 7:00
  not
• 7:00
  good
• 7:00
  enough
• 7:00
  or
• 7:01
  you're
• 7:01
  not
• 7:01
  enough
• 7:02
  or
• 7:03
  you're
• 7:03
  not
• 7:03
  worthy.
• 7:04
  You
• 7:04
  said
• 7:04
  worthiness.
• 7:05
  You
• 7:05
  use
• 7:05
  some
• 7:05
  of
• 7:06
  these
• 7:06
  words
• 7:06
  a
• 7:06
  lot,
• 7:06
  and
• 7:07
  those
• 7:07
  are
• 7:07
  words
• 7:07
  that
• 7:08
  people,
• 7:10
  that.
• 7:10
  That's
• 7:11
  what
• 7:11
  gets
• 7:11
  built
• 7:12
  into
• 7:12
  their
• 7:12
  belief
• 7:13
  system.
• 7:13
  And
• 7:13
  it's.
• 7:14
  That's
• 7:14
  what
• 7:14
  we
• 7:14
  do
• 7:15
  that
• 7:15
  as
• 7:15
  you
• 7:15
  and
• 7:15
  me,
• 7:16
  we
• 7:16
  bring
• 7:16
  that
• 7:16
  out,
• 7:17
  and
• 7:17
  that's
• 7:17
  what
• 7:17
  we
• 7:17
  need
• 7:18
  to
• 7:18
  change.
• 7:18
  Because
• 7:20
  it's
• 7:20
  so
• 7:20
  sad
• 7:20
  how
• 7:20
  it
• 7:21
  gets
• 7:21
  put
• 7:21
  there.
• 7:24
  And
• 7:24
  even
• 7:25
  if
• 7:25
  no
• 7:25
  one
• 7:25
  ever
• 7:25
  says
• 7:26
  the
• 7:26
  words,
• 7:26
  that's
• 7:27
  what's
• 7:27
  so
• 7:27
  crazy
• 7:28
  is
• 7:28
  you're
• 7:28
  just
• 7:28
  this
• 7:28
  little,
• 7:29
  like
• 7:29
  I
• 7:29
  said,
• 7:29
  this
• 7:29
  pliable
• 7:30
  sponge,
• 7:31
  and
• 7:31
  you're
• 7:31
  absorbing
• 7:32
  it.
• 7:32
  And
• 7:32
  even
• 7:33
  a
• 7:33
  look,
• 7:33
  a
• 7:34
  look
• 7:34
  from
• 7:34
  someone
• 7:35
  that,
• 7:37
  you
• 7:38
  know,
• 7:38
  makes
• 7:38
  you
• 7:39
  think
• 7:39
  you
• 7:40
  did
• 7:40
  something
• 7:40
  wrong.
• 7:41
  It's
• 7:41
  like
• 7:41
  every
• 7:42
  single
• 7:42
  thing,
• 7:42
  all
• 7:42
  you're
• 7:43
  doing
• 7:43
  is
• 7:43
  absorbing
• 7:44
  at
• 7:44
  that
• 7:44
  age.
• 7:44
  And
• 7:44
  then
• 7:45
  it's
• 7:45
  like,
• 7:45
  okay,
• 7:45
  now
• 7:45
  what
• 7:45
  do
• 7:46
  I
• 7:46
  do
• 7:46
  with
• 7:46
  this?
• 7:47
  So
• 7:47
  you
• 7:47
  talked
• 7:47
  about,
• 7:48
  at
• 7:48
  about
• 7:48
  40,
• 7:49
  you
• 7:49
  were
• 7:49
  like,
• 7:49
  okay,
• 7:50
  now
• 7:50
  I
• 7:50
  have
• 7:50
  the
• 7:50
  tools.
• 7:51
  What
• 7:51
  are
• 7:51
  some
• 7:52
  of
• 7:52
  those
• 7:52
  tools
• 7:52
  that
• 7:52
  you
• 7:53
  acquired
• 7:53
  or
• 7:54
  got
• 7:54
  or
• 7:54
  used?
• 7:56
  Yeah,
• 7:56
  I
• 7:56
  mean,
• 7:56
  there
• 7:57
  so
• 7:57
  the
• 7:58
  tools
• 7:59
  is,
• 7:59
  is
• 7:59
  basically
• 8:00
  my
• 8:01
  current
• 8:01
  modern
• 8:02
  day
• 8:02
  freedom
• 8:02
  formula.
• 8:03
  And
• 8:04
  so
• 8:04
  I've
• 8:05
  broken
• 8:05
  that
• 8:05
  down
• 8:06
  into
• 8:06
  three
• 8:07
  phases.
• 8:08
  And
• 8:09
  these
• 8:09
  are
• 8:09
  the
• 8:09
  tools
• 8:10
  in
• 8:10
  the
• 8:10
  first
• 8:10
  phase
• 8:11
  is
• 8:12
  the
• 8:13
  nervous
• 8:14
  system
• 8:14
  and
• 8:15
  the
• 8:15
  patterns
• 8:16
  and
• 8:16
  understanding
• 8:16
  the
• 8:17
  patterns.
• 8:17
  You
• 8:18
  know,
• 8:18
  because
• 8:18
  all
• 8:18
  of
• 8:18
  us,
• 8:19
  whether
• 8:19
  we've
• 8:19
  had
• 8:20
  those
• 8:20
  incredibly
• 8:21
  traumatic
• 8:22
  experiences
• 8:22
  or
• 8:23
  not,
• 8:23
  all
• 8:24
  of
• 8:24
  us
• 8:24
  have
• 8:24
  adapted,
• 8:25
  right?
• 8:25
  So
• 8:25
  you
• 8:26
  and
• 8:26
  I
• 8:26
  adapted.
• 8:26
  We
• 8:27
  had
• 8:27
  experiences
• 8:27
  that,
• 8:28
  where
• 8:28
  people
• 8:28
  on
• 8:28
  the
• 8:29
  outside
• 8:29
  might
• 8:29
  look
• 8:29
  in
• 8:30
  and
• 8:30
  say,
• 8:30
  oh
• 8:30
  yeah,
• 8:30
  that's,
• 8:31
  that's
• 8:31
  a
• 8:31
  big
• 8:31
  T
• 8:31
  trauma.
• 8:32
  But
• 8:33
  all
• 8:33
  of
• 8:33
  us,
• 8:33
  no
• 8:33
  matter
• 8:34
  who
• 8:34
  we
• 8:34
  are,
• 8:35
  adapted
• 8:35
  to
• 8:36
  our
• 8:36
  environment.
• 8:38
  It's
• 8:38
  just
• 8:38
  something
• 8:38
  that
• 8:38
  we
• 8:39
  do
• 8:39
  as
• 8:39
  humans.
• 8:40
  And
• 8:40
  so,
• 8:40
  you
• 8:41
  know,
• 8:41
  that
• 8:41
  could
• 8:41
  be
• 8:41
  for
• 8:42
  one
• 8:42
  person
• 8:42
  it
• 8:42
  might
• 8:43
  be
• 8:43
  circumstances
• 8:44
  like
• 8:44
  mine
• 8:45
  or
• 8:45
  like
• 8:45
  yours.
• 8:45
  And
• 8:46
  for
• 8:46
  someone
• 8:46
  else
• 8:46
  it
• 8:46
  might
• 8:47
  be
• 8:47
  the
• 8:47
  feeling,
• 8:48
  you
• 8:48
  know,
• 8:48
  I
• 8:48
  didn't
• 8:49
  get
• 8:49
  invited
• 8:49
  to
• 8:49
  the
• 8:49
  birthday
• 8:50
  party
• 8:50
  and
• 8:51
  I
• 8:51
  always
• 8:51
  felt
• 8:52
  like
• 8:52
  I
• 8:52
  was
• 8:53
  an
• 8:53
  outsider
• 8:53
  to
• 8:54
  the
• 8:54
  cool
• 8:55
  kids.
• 8:55
  Minimize
• 8:56
  any
• 8:57
  of
• 8:57
  the
• 8:57
  experiences.
• 8:58
  But
• 8:59
  the
• 8:59
  adaptations,
• 9:00
  you
• 9:00
  know,
• 9:00
  they,
• 9:00
  they
• 9:01
  form
• 9:01
  anyway
• 9:02
  for
• 9:02
  the
• 9:03
  reasons
• 9:03
  why
• 9:03
  you
• 9:03
  said,
• 9:04
  you
• 9:04
  know,
• 9:04
  up
• 9:04
  until
• 9:05
  certainly
• 9:06
  the
• 9:06
  age
• 9:06
  of
• 9:06
  seven
• 9:07
  and
• 9:07
  we
• 9:07
  think
• 9:07
  it
• 9:07
  might
• 9:07
  even
• 9:08
  be
• 9:08
  longer,
• 9:09
  we
• 9:09
  are
• 9:09
  just
• 9:10
  showing
• 9:10
  up
• 9:10
  in
• 9:10
  the
• 9:10
  world
• 9:11
  trying
• 9:11
  to
• 9:11
  figure
• 9:11
  things
• 9:11
  out,
• 9:12
  right.
• 9:12
  And,
• 9:13
  and,
• 9:13
  and
• 9:14
  what
• 9:14
  you
• 9:14
  said
• 9:14
  about,
• 9:15
  you
• 9:15
  know,
• 9:15
  we
• 9:15
  get
• 9:15
  the
• 9:16
  look
• 9:16
  or
• 9:16
  we
• 9:17
  get,
• 9:17
  you
• 9:17
  know,
• 9:17
  the,
• 9:18
  the
• 9:18
  response,
• 9:19
  but
• 9:19
  then
• 9:20
  something
• 9:20
  more
• 9:21
  powerful
• 9:21
  happens.
• 9:22
  Because
• 9:22
  now,
• 9:23
  once
• 9:24
  that's
• 9:24
  put
• 9:24
  into
• 9:24
  place,
• 9:25
  now
• 9:26
  I
• 9:26
  go
• 9:26
  out
• 9:26
  into
• 9:26
  the
• 9:26
  world
• 9:27
  and
• 9:27
  I
• 9:27
  have
• 9:27
  other
• 9:27
  interactions
• 9:28
  and
• 9:28
  I'm
• 9:29
  assuming
• 9:29
  that
• 9:30
  those
• 9:30
  people
• 9:30
  are
• 9:30
  having
• 9:31
  the
• 9:31
  same
• 9:31
  interaction
• 9:32
  with
• 9:32
  me
• 9:33
  that
• 9:33
  I,
• 9:33
  because
• 9:33
  now
• 9:34
  my
• 9:34
  brain
• 9:34
  is
• 9:34
  trained
• 9:35
  to
• 9:36
  see
• 9:36
  the
• 9:36
  world
• 9:36
  in
• 9:36
  this
• 9:37
  way.
• 9:37
  So
• 9:37
  I
• 9:37
  may,
• 9:38
  you
• 9:38
  know,
• 9:38
  run
• 9:38
  across
• 9:38
  someone
• 9:39
  who's
• 9:39
  having
• 9:39
  a
• 9:39
  bad
• 9:40
  day
• 9:40
  and
• 9:40
  they
• 9:41
  have
• 9:41
  a
• 9:41
  look
• 9:41
  on
• 9:41
  their
• 9:41
  face
• 9:42
  and
• 9:42
  that
• 9:42
  look
• 9:42
  becomes
• 9:43
  about
• 9:43
  me
• 9:43
  now.
• 9:44
  And
• 9:44
  I
• 9:45
  live
• 9:45
  in
• 9:45
  a
• 9:45
  different
• 9:46
  world
• 9:46
  because
• 9:47
  I
• 9:48
  had
• 9:48
  those
• 9:48
  experiences.
• 9:49
  You
• 9:50
  know,
• 9:50
  someone
• 9:51
  with
• 9:51
  a
• 9:51
  different
• 9:51
  type
• 9:52
  of
• 9:52
  experience
• 9:52
  might
• 9:53
  look
• 9:53
  at
• 9:53
  someone
• 9:53
  with
• 9:53
  that,
• 9:54
  that
• 9:54
  look
• 9:54
  on
• 9:54
  their
• 9:54
  face
• 9:55
  and
• 9:55
  say,
• 9:55
  oh,
• 9:55
  they
• 9:56
  must
• 9:56
  be
• 9:56
  having
• 9:56
  a
• 9:56
  bad
• 9:57
  day.
• 9:57
  Hi,
• 9:58
  how
• 9:58
  are
• 9:58
  you?
• 9:58
  You
• 9:59
  know,
• 9:59
  and
• 9:59
  whereas
• 10:00
  I'm
• 10:00
  looking
• 10:00
  at
• 10:00
  them
• 10:01
  and
• 10:01
  think,
• 10:01
  oh
• 10:01
  my
• 10:01
  gosh,
• 10:01
  they
• 10:01
  hate
• 10:02
  me.
• 10:02
  They
• 10:02
  see
• 10:02
  how
• 10:02
  awful
• 10:03
  I
• 10:03
  am.
• 10:04
  Right?
• 10:04
  It's
• 10:04
  a
• 10:04
  story.
• 10:05
  And
• 10:05
  that's
• 10:05
  why
• 10:05
  I
• 10:05
  said
• 10:05
  earlier,
• 10:06
  it's,
• 10:06
  it's,
• 10:07
  yes,
• 10:07
  what
• 10:07
  happened
• 10:07
  to
• 10:08
  you?
• 10:08
  But
• 10:08
  it's
• 10:08
  more
• 10:09
  the
• 10:09
  story
• 10:09
  that
• 10:09
  gets
• 10:10
  built
• 10:10
  on
• 10:10
  top
• 10:11
  of
• 10:11
  those
• 10:11
  experiences
• 10:12
  that
• 10:12
  become
• 10:13
  so
• 10:13
  damaging
• 10:14
  because
• 10:14
  then
• 10:14
  they
• 10:15
  go
• 10:15
  on
• 10:15
  your
• 10:15
  whole
• 10:16
  life
• 10:17
  and
• 10:17
  create,
• 10:18
  you
• 10:18
  know,
• 10:18
  just
• 10:19
  injury
• 10:19
  after
• 10:20
  injury,
• 10:20
  pain
• 10:21
  after
• 10:21
  pain.
• 10:22
  So
• 10:23
  they
• 10:23
  are
• 10:23
  not
• 10:23
  limited
• 10:24
  at
• 10:24
  all
• 10:24
  to
• 10:25
  the,
• 10:25
  the
• 10:26
  time
• 10:26
  frame
• 10:26
  in
• 10:26
  which
• 10:26
  they
• 10:26
  occur.
• 10:27
  Yeah,
• 10:28
  not
• 10:28
  at
• 10:28
  all.
• 10:28
  And
• 10:28
  I
• 10:29
  talk
• 10:29
  about
• 10:29
  that
• 10:30
  with
• 10:31
  one
• 10:31
  of
• 10:31
  my
• 10:31
  clients
• 10:32
  and
• 10:32
  we
• 10:32
  laugh
• 10:32
  so
• 10:33
  hard
• 10:33
  because
• 10:33
  she
• 10:33
  was
• 10:33
  one
• 10:33
  of
• 10:34
  those
• 10:34
  that
• 10:34
  would
• 10:34
  walk
• 10:34
  Into
• 10:34
  a
• 10:35
  room.
• 10:35
  And
• 10:35
  if
• 10:35
  someone
• 10:35
  look
• 10:35
  at
• 10:35
  her
• 10:36
  cross
• 10:36
  eyed,
• 10:37
  she's
• 10:37
  like,
• 10:37
  what
• 10:37
  did
• 10:37
  I
• 10:37
  do
• 10:38
  wrong?
• 10:38
  Oh
• 10:38
  my
• 10:38
  go.
• 10:38
  I
• 10:38
  stink
• 10:39
  at
• 10:39
  this.
• 10:39
  Oh
• 10:39
  my
• 10:39
  gosh,
• 10:39
  I'm
• 10:39
  doing
• 10:40
  something.
• 10:40
  And
• 10:40
  immediately
• 10:41
  went
• 10:41
  into
• 10:41
  this
• 10:41
  thing.
• 10:42
  And
• 10:42
  I
• 10:43
  was
• 10:43
  like,
• 10:43
  you
• 10:43
  know,
• 10:43
  if
• 10:43
  someone
• 10:44
  raises
• 10:44
  an
• 10:44
  eyebrow,
• 10:45
  just
• 10:45
  from
• 10:45
  now
• 10:45
  on,
• 10:46
  every
• 10:46
  time
• 10:46
  you
• 10:46
  see
• 10:46
  someone
• 10:47
  raise
• 10:47
  an
• 10:47
  eyebrow
• 10:47
  in
• 10:47
  your
• 10:48
  direction,
• 10:49
  assume
• 10:49
  that
• 10:50
  they
• 10:50
  have
• 10:50
  a
• 10:50
  really
• 10:50
  annoying
• 10:51
  itch
• 10:51
  on
• 10:52
  their
• 10:52
  eyebrow.
• 10:52
  And
• 10:53
  so
• 10:53
  like
• 10:53
  when
• 10:53
  you
• 10:53
  see
• 10:53
  someone's
• 10:54
  eyes
• 10:54
  go
• 10:54
  up,
• 10:54
  like,
• 10:54
  and
• 10:55
  after
• 10:55
  she
• 10:55
  said,
• 10:55
  after
• 10:55
  a
• 10:56
  couple
• 10:56
  months
• 10:56
  of
• 10:56
  doing
• 10:56
  that,
• 10:57
  she
• 10:57
  literally
• 10:57
  would
• 10:57
  like
• 10:58
  touch
• 10:58
  her
• 10:58
  own
• 10:58
  eye
• 10:59
  just
• 10:59
  to
• 10:59
  see
• 10:59
  if
• 10:59
  something
• 11:00
  was
• 11:00
  there.
• 11:00
  But
• 11:01
  it
• 11:01
  no
• 11:01
  longer
• 11:02
  had
• 11:02
  that,
• 11:03
  that
• 11:03
  attachment
• 11:04
  to
• 11:05
  stress.
• 11:06
  And,
• 11:06
  you
• 11:07
  know,
• 11:07
  she
• 11:07
  had
• 11:07
  to
• 11:07
  really
• 11:08
  re.
• 11:08
  And
• 11:08
  that
• 11:08
  was
• 11:08
  just
• 11:09
  rewiring
• 11:09
  and
• 11:09
  it
• 11:10
  was
• 11:10
  just
• 11:10
  telling
• 11:11
  a
• 11:11
  different
• 11:11
  story
• 11:11
  and
• 11:12
  over
• 11:12
  and
• 11:12
  over
• 11:12
  and
• 11:13
  over
• 11:13
  again.
• 11:13
  But
• 11:14
  you're
• 11:14
  so
• 11:14
  right
• 11:15
  about,
• 11:15
  I
• 11:15
  talk
• 11:16
  about
• 11:16
  it
• 11:16
  all
• 11:16
  the
• 11:16
  time
• 11:17
  about
• 11:17
  scanning
• 11:18
  for
• 11:18
  the
• 11:18
  negative.
• 11:19
  When
• 11:19
  you
• 11:19
  grew
• 11:20
  up
• 11:20
  and
• 11:20
  you
• 11:20
  were
• 11:20
  always
• 11:21
  on
• 11:21
  that
• 11:21
  edge
• 11:21
  and
• 11:22
  that
• 11:22
  fight
• 11:22
  and
• 11:22
  flight
• 11:23
  and
• 11:23
  you
• 11:23
  were
• 11:23
  always
• 11:23
  waiting
• 11:23
  for
• 11:24
  that
• 11:24
  next
• 11:24
  thing
• 11:24
  to
• 11:25
  happen,
• 11:25
  you
• 11:26
  learned
• 11:26
  to
• 11:26
  scan
• 11:27
  for
• 11:27
  bad.
• 11:28
  You
• 11:28
  didn't
• 11:28
  learn.
• 11:29
  So
• 11:29
  immediately
• 11:30
  you
• 11:30
  saw
• 11:30
  something
• 11:31
  and
• 11:31
  you
• 11:31
  assume,
• 11:32
  assumed
• 11:32
  it
• 11:32
  was
• 11:32
  bad.
• 11:32
  If
• 11:33
  someone
• 11:33
  was
• 11:33
  walking
• 11:33
  at
• 11:34
  you,
• 11:35
  it
• 11:35
  was
• 11:35
  because
• 11:35
  they
• 11:35
  were
• 11:36
  going
• 11:36
  to
• 11:36
  confront
• 11:36
  you,
• 11:37
  not
• 11:37
  that
• 11:37
  they
• 11:37
  wanted
• 11:37
  to
• 11:38
  hug
• 11:38
  you.
• 11:38
  Right.
• 11:39
  You
• 11:40
  really,
• 11:40
  it
• 11:41
  takes
• 11:41
  a
• 11:41
  long
• 11:42
  time
• 11:42
  too.
• 11:43
  So
• 11:43
  you
• 11:43
  didn't
• 11:44
  finish,
• 11:44
  you
• 11:44
  started
• 11:44
  talking.
• 11:45
  I
• 11:45
  mean,
• 11:45
  I
• 11:45
  cut
• 11:46
  you
• 11:46
  off
• 11:46
  a
• 11:46
  little
• 11:46
  bit
• 11:46
  or
• 11:46
  we
• 11:47
  got
• 11:47
  on
• 11:47
  a
• 11:47
  tangent.
• 11:47
  Whatever
• 11:47
  you
• 11:48
  want
• 11:48
  to.
• 11:48
  Yeah,
• 11:48
  we
• 11:48
  got
• 11:48
  excited
• 11:49
  about
• 11:49
  something.
• 11:49
  We
• 11:50
  got
• 11:50
  a
• 11:50
  lot
• 11:50
  to
• 11:50
  cover
• 11:50
  here
• 11:51
  and
• 11:51
  I
• 11:51
  know
• 11:51
  you
• 11:51
  have
• 11:51
  some
• 11:51
  really
• 11:52
  good
• 11:52
  information.
• 11:53
  So
• 11:53
  you
• 11:53
  talk
• 11:53
  about
• 11:53
  the
• 11:53
  nervous
• 11:54
  system
• 11:54
  and
• 11:54
  the
• 11:54
  patterns
• 11:55
  goes
• 11:55
  in
• 11:55
  that
• 11:56
  step
• 11:56
  one,
• 11:56
  in
• 11:57
  that
• 11:57
  first
• 11:57
  phase.
• 11:57
  Absolutely.
• 11:58
  Yeah.
• 11:58
  Because,
• 11:59
  you
• 11:59
  know,
• 11:59
  our,
• 11:59
  our
• 12:00
  adaptations
• 12:01
  essentially,
• 12:01
  they
• 12:01
  have
• 12:02
  so
• 12:02
  many
• 12:02
  of
• 12:02
  us
• 12:02
  living
• 12:03
  in
• 12:03
  survival
• 12:04
  mode
• 12:04
  right.
• 12:04
  Where
• 12:05
  our
• 12:05
  nervous
• 12:06
  system
• 12:06
  is
• 12:07
  highly
• 12:07
  activated.
• 12:08
  We're
• 12:09
  hypervigilant.
• 12:10
  We
• 12:10
  are,
• 12:10
  you
• 12:11
  know,
• 12:11
  scanning
• 12:12
  for
• 12:12
  danger.
• 12:12
  We're,
• 12:13
  we're
• 12:13
  all
• 12:13
  the
• 12:13
  things.
• 12:14
  And
• 12:14
  as
• 12:15
  a,
• 12:15
  as
• 12:15
  a
• 12:15
  first
• 12:16
  step,
• 12:16
  we
• 12:16
  need
• 12:16
  to
• 12:17
  understand
• 12:18
  our
• 12:18
  nervous
• 12:18
  system.
• 12:19
  We
• 12:19
  need
• 12:19
  to
• 12:20
  reprogram
• 12:21
  right
• 12:22
  at
• 12:22
  that
• 12:22
  foundational
• 12:23
  level.
• 12:24
  Because
• 12:25
  if
• 12:25
  our
• 12:25
  nervous
• 12:25
  system
• 12:26
  is
• 12:26
  not
• 12:26
  healthy
• 12:27
  and
• 12:27
  well
• 12:27
  regulated,
• 12:28
  it
• 12:28
  doesn't
• 12:29
  matter
• 12:29
  how
• 12:29
  much
• 12:29
  mindset
• 12:30
  work
• 12:30
  we
• 12:31
  attempt
• 12:31
  to
• 12:31
  do
• 12:32
  or
• 12:32
  whatever
• 12:33
  else
• 12:33
  we
• 12:33
  try
• 12:33
  to
• 12:33
  stack
• 12:34
  on
• 12:34
  top
• 12:34
  of
• 12:34
  it.
• 12:34
  I
• 12:34
  think
• 12:35
  of
• 12:35
  our
• 12:35
  nervous
• 12:35
  system
• 12:36
  and
• 12:36
  the
• 12:37
  regulation
• 12:37
  there
• 12:38
  as
• 12:38
  like
• 12:38
  our
• 12:39
  strong,
• 12:39
  sturdy
• 12:40
  basement.
• 12:40
  It's
• 12:40
  like
• 12:41
  the
• 12:41
  foundation
• 12:41
  of
• 12:42
  our
• 12:42
  house
• 12:42
  that
• 12:42
  we
• 12:43
  want
• 12:43
  to
• 12:43
  build
• 12:44
  in
• 12:44
  the
• 12:44
  house
• 12:44
  being
• 12:45
  our
• 12:45
  life.
• 12:45
  And
• 12:46
  if
• 12:46
  we
• 12:46
  go
• 12:46
  and
• 12:46
  we
• 12:47
  start
• 12:47
  trying
• 12:47
  to
• 12:47
  construct
• 12:48
  second
• 12:48
  floor
• 12:48
  balconies
• 12:49
  and
• 12:50
  we
• 12:50
  have
• 12:50
  no
• 12:50
  foundation,
• 12:51
  it
• 12:51
  crumbles
• 12:52
  over
• 12:52
  and
• 12:52
  over.
• 12:53
  And
• 12:53
  then
• 12:53
  we
• 12:53
  use
• 12:53
  that
• 12:53
  as
• 12:54
  evidence
• 12:54
  against
• 12:54
  ourselves
• 12:55
  that
• 12:55
  we
• 12:55
  can't
• 12:56
  change,
• 12:57
  that
• 12:57
  we
• 12:57
  can't
• 12:57
  accomplish.
• 12:58
  And
• 12:58
  in
• 12:59
  reality,
• 12:59
  what's
• 12:59
  happening
• 13:00
  is
• 13:00
  we
• 13:00
  just
• 13:00
  don't
• 13:00
  have
• 13:00
  that
• 13:01
  strong
• 13:01
  foundation
• 13:01
  that
• 13:02
  we
• 13:02
  need.
• 13:03
  So
• 13:03
  the,
• 13:03
  the
• 13:04
  first
• 13:04
  phase,
• 13:04
  which
• 13:05
  is
• 13:05
  the
• 13:05
  first
• 13:05
  book
• 13:06
  here,
• 13:06
  you're
• 13:06
  not
• 13:06
  the
• 13:07
  problem,
• 13:07
  is
• 13:07
  all
• 13:07
  about
• 13:08
  the
• 13:08
  three
• 13:08
  things
• 13:08
  that
• 13:09
  the
• 13:09
  nervous
• 13:09
  system
• 13:09
  needs
• 13:10
  to
• 13:10
  come
• 13:11
  back
• 13:11
  to
• 13:12
  health
• 13:12
  and
• 13:12
  regulation.
• 13:13
  And
• 13:13
  those
• 13:14
  three
• 13:14
  things
• 13:14
  are
• 13:14
  safety,
• 13:16
  capacity,
• 13:18
  and
• 13:18
  energy.
• 13:20
  And
• 13:20
  when
• 13:20
  you
• 13:20
  have
• 13:21
  those
• 13:21
  things,
• 13:22
  you
• 13:22
  have
• 13:22
  the
• 13:23
  power
• 13:23
  to
• 13:24
  then
• 13:24
  start
• 13:24
  to
• 13:25
  look
• 13:25
  at,
• 13:25
  which
• 13:25
  is
• 13:26
  second
• 13:26
  phase
• 13:26
  you
• 13:26
  get
• 13:27
  and
• 13:27
  start
• 13:27
  to
• 13:27
  look
• 13:27
  at
• 13:27
  your
• 13:28
  thought
• 13:28
  patterns
• 13:29
  and
• 13:30
  your,
• 13:30
  your
• 13:30
  belief
• 13:31
  systems,
• 13:31
  your
• 13:31
  operating
• 13:32
  system.
• 13:33
  But
• 13:33
  before
• 13:34
  that,
• 13:34
  you
• 13:35
  know,
• 13:35
  that's
• 13:35
  why
• 13:35
  we
• 13:36
  say
• 13:36
  a
• 13:36
  lot
• 13:36
  of
• 13:36
  times
• 13:36
  people
• 13:37
  will
• 13:38
  arrive
• 13:38
  in,
• 13:39
  in
• 13:39
  my
• 13:39
  sphere
• 13:40
  and
• 13:40
  say,
• 13:40
  you
• 13:40
  know,
• 13:40
  I've
• 13:40
  been
• 13:40
  in
• 13:40
  therapy
• 13:41
  for
• 13:41
  15
• 13:41
  years
• 13:41
  and
• 13:42
  nothing
• 13:42
  has
• 13:42
  really
• 13:43
  changed.
• 13:43
  As
• 13:43
  you
• 13:43
  said,
• 13:44
  I
• 13:44
  understand
• 13:45
  things.
• 13:46
  Right?
• 13:46
  But
• 13:46
  nothing's
• 13:47
  really
• 13:47
  changed
• 13:47
  for
• 13:48
  me.
• 13:48
  And
• 13:48
  I
• 13:48
  think
• 13:48
  a
• 13:48
  lot
• 13:49
  of
• 13:49
  the,
• 13:49
  the
• 13:50
  time
• 13:50
  what
• 13:51
  has
• 13:51
  happened
• 13:51
  is
• 13:51
  that
• 13:52
  they
• 13:52
  don't
• 13:52
  have
• 13:52
  the
• 13:53
  nervous
• 13:53
  system
• 13:54
  regulation
• 13:55
  to
• 13:55
  be
• 13:55
  able
• 13:56
  to
• 13:56
  change
• 13:57
  the
• 13:57
  patterns.
• 13:58
  Right.
• 13:58
  And
• 13:59
  I
• 13:59
  think
• 13:59
  that's.
• 13:59
  I
• 14:00
  just
• 14:00
  wanted
• 14:00
  to
• 14:00
  name
• 14:00
  earlier
• 14:01
  what
• 14:01
  a
• 14:01
  painful
• 14:02
  place
• 14:02
  to
• 14:02
  be
• 14:02
  in.
• 14:03
  It's
• 14:03
  almost
• 14:03
  worse
• 14:04
  to
• 14:04
  know
• 14:05
  why
• 14:06
  you
• 14:06
  understand
• 14:07
  your
• 14:07
  behaviors
• 14:08
  and
• 14:08
  not
• 14:09
  be
• 14:09
  able
• 14:09
  to.
• 14:09
  To
• 14:09
  change
• 14:10
  them.
• 14:10
  Because
• 14:10
  once
• 14:10
  we
• 14:11
  understand
• 14:11
  them,
• 14:11
  we
• 14:11
  feel
• 14:12
  like
• 14:12
  we
• 14:12
  should
• 14:13
  be
• 14:13
  able
• 14:13
  to
• 14:13
  at
• 14:14
  that
• 14:14
  point,
• 14:14
  you
• 14:15
  know,
• 14:15
  so
• 14:15
  it's
• 14:15
  almost
• 14:16
  worse,
• 14:17
  you
• 14:17
  know,
• 14:17
  to,
• 14:17
  to
• 14:17
  understand
• 14:18
  it
• 14:18
  and
• 14:18
  not
• 14:18
  have
• 14:19
  the,
• 14:19
  the
• 14:19
  skills
• 14:20
  and
• 14:20
  the
• 14:20
  tools
• 14:21
  to
• 14:21
  do
• 14:21
  any
• 14:22
  different.
• 14:22
  It
• 14:23
  is.
• 14:23
  And
• 14:23
  I
• 14:23
  tell
• 14:23
  people,
• 14:24
  you
• 14:24
  can
• 14:24
  trick
• 14:24
  your
• 14:24
  mind
• 14:25
  like
• 14:25
  you
• 14:25
  can
• 14:25
  say
• 14:26
  all
• 14:26
  the
• 14:26
  mantras
• 14:27
  in
• 14:27
  the
• 14:27
  world,
• 14:27
  but
• 14:27
  when
• 14:28
  the
• 14:28
  rubber
• 14:28
  hits
• 14:28
  the
• 14:28
  road
• 14:29
  and
• 14:29
  you
• 14:29
  have
• 14:29
  to
• 14:30
  act,
• 14:30
  you're
• 14:30
  not
• 14:31
  acting.
• 14:31
  Everything
• 14:32
  comes
• 14:32
  from
• 14:32
  your
• 14:33
  body
• 14:33
  to
• 14:33
  your
• 14:33
  brain,
• 14:34
  not
• 14:34
  the
• 14:34
  other
• 14:35
  way
• 14:35
  around.
• 14:35
  So,
• 14:36
  yes,
• 14:37
  you
• 14:37
  know,
• 14:37
  regulate
• 14:38
  first,
• 14:39
  then
• 14:39
  heal
• 14:40
  like
• 14:40
  you
• 14:40
  cannot.
• 14:41
  You
• 14:41
  can't.
• 14:41
  First
• 14:41
  of
• 14:42
  all,
• 14:42
  you
• 14:42
  can't
• 14:42
  do
• 14:42
  any
• 14:42
  healing
• 14:43
  when
• 14:43
  you're
• 14:43
  not
• 14:43
  regulated.
• 14:44
  Absolutely.
• 14:44
  Because
• 14:45
  you're
• 14:45
  not
• 14:45
  even
• 14:45
  working
• 14:46
  from
• 14:46
  the
• 14:46
  right
• 14:47
  part
• 14:47
  of
• 14:47
  your
• 14:47
  brain.
• 14:48
  Yes.
• 14:49
  You
• 14:49
  don't
• 14:49
  have
• 14:49
  access.
• 14:50
  So
• 14:50
  in
• 14:51
  your
• 14:51
  example
• 14:51
  with
• 14:52
  your
• 14:52
  client,
• 14:52
  who,
• 14:53
  you
• 14:53
  know,
• 14:53
  was,
• 14:53
  was
• 14:54
  trying
• 14:54
  to
• 14:54
  develop
• 14:55
  that
• 14:55
  new
• 14:55
  pattern,
• 14:56
  there
• 14:56
  was
• 14:56
  a
• 14:57
  couple
• 14:57
  things
• 14:57
  going
• 14:57
  on.
• 14:58
  Right.
• 14:58
  Which
• 14:58
  is
• 14:58
  so
• 14:58
  genius
• 14:59
  that
• 14:59
  you
• 14:59
  gave
• 14:59
  her
• 14:59
  another
• 15:00
  story.
• 15:01
  Because
• 15:01
  one
• 15:01
  of
• 15:01
  the
• 15:01
  things
• 15:02
  that
• 15:02
  happens
• 15:02
  for
• 15:02
  us
• 15:02
  is
• 15:03
  our
• 15:03
  brain
• 15:04
  doesn't
• 15:04
  have
• 15:05
  any
• 15:05
  other
• 15:06
  way
• 15:06
  to
• 15:06
  go.
• 15:07
  There's.
• 15:07
  It's
• 15:07
  the
• 15:08
  only
• 15:08
  show
• 15:09
  in
• 15:09
  town
• 15:09
  is
• 15:10
  that
• 15:10
  these
• 15:10
  people
• 15:11
  are
• 15:11
  reacting
• 15:11
  to
• 15:12
  me
• 15:12
  in
• 15:12
  a,
• 15:12
  in
• 15:12
  a
• 15:12
  negative
• 15:13
  way.
• 15:13
  So
• 15:14
  you
• 15:14
  gave
• 15:14
  her
• 15:15
  another
• 15:16
  story
• 15:17
  that
• 15:17
  wasn't
• 15:17
  there.
• 15:17
  There
• 15:18
  was
• 15:18
  no
• 15:18
  path.
• 15:18
  She
• 15:19
  had
• 15:19
  no
• 15:19
  choice
• 15:19
  in
• 15:20
  those
• 15:20
  moments.
• 15:20
  Right.
• 15:21
  And
• 15:21
  that's
• 15:21
  what
• 15:22
  happens
• 15:22
  to
• 15:22
  us
• 15:22
  when
• 15:23
  we
• 15:23
  become
• 15:23
  adapted
• 15:24
  in
• 15:24
  that
• 15:24
  way.
• 15:24
  So
• 15:24
  you
• 15:25
  gave
• 15:25
  her
• 15:25
  another
• 15:25
  choice,
• 15:26
  but
• 15:27
  she
• 15:27
  must
• 15:27
  have
• 15:28
  been
• 15:28
  working
• 15:28
  with
• 15:28
  you
• 15:29
  on
• 15:29
  her
• 15:29
  regulation,
• 15:30
  because
• 15:30
  otherwise
• 15:31
  there
• 15:31
  wouldn't.
• 15:32
  That
• 15:32
  other
• 15:32
  path
• 15:33
  wouldn't
• 15:33
  have
• 15:34
  taken
• 15:34
  form.
• 15:35
  It
• 15:35
  would
• 15:36
  have
• 15:36
  been
• 15:36
  rejected.
• 15:37
  Yeah.
• 15:38
  So
• 15:38
  it's.
• 15:39
  You
• 15:39
  know,
• 15:39
  we
• 15:39
  need
• 15:40
  the.
• 15:40
  We
• 15:40
  need
• 15:40
  the
• 15:41
  foundation
• 15:41
  first,
• 15:42
  and
• 15:42
  then
• 15:42
  we
• 15:42
  can
• 15:42
  go
• 15:43
  into.
• 15:43
  What
• 15:44
  are
• 15:44
  those
• 15:44
  alternative
• 15:45
  neural
• 15:45
  pathways
• 15:46
  that
• 15:46
  I
• 15:46
  can
• 15:46
  build
• 15:47
  now
• 15:48
  that
• 15:48
  I'm
• 15:48
  using
• 15:48
  my
• 15:49
  executive
• 15:49
  functioning,
• 15:50
  my
• 15:50
  prefrontal
• 15:50
  cortex,
• 15:51
  as
• 15:51
  opposed
• 15:51
  to
• 15:51
  my.
• 15:52
  My
• 15:52
  limbic
• 15:53
  brain.
• 15:53
  And
• 15:54
  that's
• 15:54
  what
• 15:54
  we
• 15:54
  do.
• 15:55
  We
• 15:55
  reconnect
• 15:55
  with
• 15:56
  the
• 15:56
  part
• 15:56
  of
• 15:56
  us
• 15:56
  that
• 15:56
  can
• 15:57
  heal
• 15:57
  and
• 15:57
  change
• 15:58
  as
• 15:58
  a.
• 15:59
  As
• 15:59
  a
• 15:59
  necessary
• 16:00
  foundational
• 16:01
  step.
• 16:01
  And
• 16:01
  then
• 16:02
  the
• 16:02
  third
• 16:02
  part
• 16:02
  is
• 16:02
  the
• 16:03
  easy
• 16:03
  and
• 16:03
  the
• 16:03
  fun
• 16:04
  part,
• 16:04
  which
• 16:04
  is
• 16:05
  own
• 16:05
  it.
• 16:05
  You've
• 16:06
  done
• 16:06
  the
• 16:06
  work
• 16:06
  now
• 16:07
  build
• 16:07
  the
• 16:07
  life.
• 16:08
  Now
• 16:08
  let's,
• 16:08
  you
• 16:09
  know,
• 16:09
  start
• 16:09
  brainstorming,
• 16:10
  start
• 16:10
  dreaming,
• 16:11
  and.
• 16:12
  And
• 16:12
  t.
• 16:13
  We
• 16:13
  can
• 16:13
  start
• 16:13
  then
• 16:13
  taking
• 16:14
  the
• 16:14
  steps
• 16:14
  because
• 16:15
  you
• 16:15
  have
• 16:15
  the
• 16:15
  capacity,
• 16:16
  the
• 16:16
  energy,
• 16:16
  the
• 16:17
  right
• 16:17
  mindset
• 16:18
  to
• 16:18
  take
• 16:18
  those
• 16:19
  steps.
• 16:19
  Most
• 16:19
  of
• 16:20
  us
• 16:20
  as
• 16:20
  humans.
• 16:20
  Right.
• 16:20
  We
• 16:21
  want
• 16:21
  to
• 16:21
  start
• 16:21
  at
• 16:21
  that
• 16:21
  third
• 16:22
  phase.
• 16:22
  Right
• 16:23
  away.
• 16:23
  We're
• 16:23
  just.
• 16:23
  Oh,
• 16:24
  yeah,
• 16:24
  I
• 16:24
  want
• 16:24
  to
• 16:25
  get.
• 16:25
  I
• 16:25
  want
• 16:25
  to
• 16:25
  change
• 16:25
  right
• 16:26
  now.
• 16:26
  I
• 16:26
  want
• 16:26
  everything
• 16:26
  to
• 16:27
  be
• 16:27
  different
• 16:27
  today
• 16:28
  without
• 16:28
  taking
• 16:29
  the
• 16:29
  time
• 16:29
  to
• 16:29
  do
• 16:29
  the
• 16:30
  first
• 16:30
  two
• 16:31
  foundational
• 16:31
  pieces.
• 16:32
  And
• 16:32
  that's
• 16:32
  frustrating,
• 16:33
  and
• 16:33
  I
• 16:33
  get
• 16:33
  that,
• 16:34
  and
• 16:34
  I
• 16:34
  was
• 16:34
  certainly
• 16:35
  there
• 16:35
  forever
• 16:37
  myself.
• 16:37
  But
• 16:38
  taking
• 16:38
  the
• 16:38
  time
• 16:39
  to
• 16:39
  build
• 16:39
  it
• 16:40
  is.
• 16:41
  It
• 16:41
  really
• 16:41
  is
• 16:42
  the
• 16:42
  fastest
• 16:42
  way.
• 16:43
  Yeah,
• 16:43
  it
• 16:43
  really
• 16:44
  is.
• 16:44
  And
• 16:44
  that's
• 16:45
  the
• 16:45
  good
• 16:45
  thing.
• 16:45
  The
• 16:45
  good
• 16:46
  thing
• 16:46
  about
• 16:46
  having
• 16:46
  therapists
• 16:47
  and
• 16:47
  coaches
• 16:47
  and
• 16:48
  whoever
• 16:48
  you
• 16:48
  have
• 16:49
  that
• 16:49
  has
• 16:49
  already
• 16:49
  tried
• 16:50
  all
• 16:50
  these
• 16:50
  tools
• 16:51
  and
• 16:51
  has
• 16:51
  already
• 16:51
  started
• 16:52
  accumulating
• 16:53
  this
• 16:53
  toolbox
• 16:53
  of
• 16:53
  tools,
• 16:54
  because
• 16:55
  it
• 16:55
  doesn't
• 16:55
  have
• 16:55
  to
• 16:56
  take
• 16:56
  30
• 16:56
  years.
• 16:57
  I
• 16:57
  mean,
• 16:57
  it
• 16:57
  takes
• 16:58
  time.
• 16:58
  Don't
• 16:58
  get
• 16:58
  me
• 16:59
  wrong.
• 16:59
  And
• 16:59
  I
• 16:59
  truly
• 17:00
  believe
• 17:00
  that
• 17:00
  God
• 17:01
  unravels
• 17:02
  another
• 17:02
  layer
• 17:02
  of
• 17:02
  that
• 17:03
  onion
• 17:03
  as
• 17:03
  you're
• 17:03
  ready
• 17:04
  to
• 17:04
  deal
• 17:04
  with
• 17:04
  it.
• 17:04
  So
• 17:05
  it's
• 17:05
  a
• 17:06
  lifelong
• 17:06
  process,
• 17:07
  but
• 17:07
  there's
• 17:07
  no
• 17:07
  A
• 17:07
  to
• 17:08
  Z.
• 17:08
  There's
• 17:08
  no,
• 17:09
  do
• 17:09
  these
• 17:09
  26
• 17:10
  steps,
• 17:10
  and
• 17:10
  you're
• 17:11
  gonna
• 17:11
  be
• 17:11
  good.
• 17:11
  Yes.
• 17:12
  I
• 17:12
  love
• 17:12
  that
• 17:13
  you're
• 17:13
  saying
• 17:13
  that.
• 17:13
  Yeah.
• 17:14
  It's
• 17:14
  just
• 17:14
  not
• 17:15
  a
• 17:15
  thing.
• 17:15
  Yeah.
• 17:16
  And
• 17:16
  then
• 17:16
  that's,
• 17:17
  you
• 17:17
  know,
• 17:17
  and
• 17:17
  that's
• 17:17
  kind
• 17:18
  of
• 17:18
  that.
• 17:18
  That
• 17:18
  thing
• 17:19
  that
• 17:19
  we
• 17:19
  like
• 17:19
  to
• 17:19
  do
• 17:19
  as
• 17:20
  humans
• 17:20
  where
• 17:20
  we're,
• 17:21
  like,
• 17:21
  looking
• 17:22
  for
• 17:22
  something
• 17:22
  outside
• 17:22
  of
• 17:23
  us
• 17:23
  to
• 17:23
  save
• 17:23
  us.
• 17:23
  Right.
• 17:24
  Just
• 17:24
  give
• 17:24
  me
• 17:25
  the
• 17:25
  thing
• 17:25
  to
• 17:25
  do,
• 17:26
  and
• 17:26
  I'll
• 17:26
  do
• 17:26
  it.
• 17:27
  And.
• 17:27
  And.
• 17:28
  But
• 17:28
  the
• 17:28
  thing
• 17:28
  is,
• 17:29
  you
• 17:29
  have
• 17:30
  to
• 17:30
  tap
• 17:30
  into
• 17:30
  your
• 17:31
  own
• 17:31
  wisdom
• 17:32
  and
• 17:33
  your
• 17:33
  own,
• 17:34
  you
• 17:34
  know,
• 17:34
  understandings.
• 17:35
  It's.
• 17:35
  It's
• 17:36
  not
• 17:36
  something
• 17:36
  that
• 17:36
  someone
• 17:37
  can
• 17:37
  give
• 17:37
  you.
• 17:38
  No,
• 17:38
  they
• 17:38
  can.
• 17:39
  They
• 17:39
  can
• 17:39
  give
• 17:40
  you
• 17:40
  the
• 17:40
  tools,
• 17:40
  but
• 17:41
  they
• 17:41
  cannot.
• 17:42
  They
• 17:42
  cannot
• 17:42
  get
• 17:42
  in
• 17:42
  your
• 17:43
  soul.
• 17:43
  I've
• 17:43
  gotten
• 17:44
  a
• 17:44
  lot
• 17:44
  more
• 17:44
  into,
• 17:45
  like,
• 17:45
  the
• 17:45
  energy
• 17:46
  work
• 17:46
  part
• 17:47
  of
• 17:47
  it.
• 17:47
  And
• 17:48
  I
• 17:48
  do
• 17:48
  a
• 17:48
  biofrequency
• 17:49
  scan.
• 17:49
  I
• 17:50
  don't
• 17:50
  know
• 17:50
  if
• 17:50
  you've
• 17:50
  ever
• 17:50
  heard
• 17:50
  of
• 17:51
  them.
• 17:51
  Like
• 17:51
  a
• 17:51
  bioresonance
• 17:52
  scan
• 17:53
  with
• 17:53
  the
• 17:53
  voice
• 17:54
  that
• 17:54
  literally
• 17:55
  comes
• 17:56
  up
• 17:56
  with
• 17:56
  it.
• 17:56
  It
• 17:57
  does
• 17:57
  about
• 17:57
  171,000
• 17:58
  different
• 17:59
  frequencies.
• 18:00
  But
• 18:00
  what
• 18:00
  it
• 18:00
  does
• 18:01
  over
• 18:01
  time
• 18:02
  for
• 18:02
  people
• 18:03
  is
• 18:03
  it
• 18:03
  establishes
• 18:04
  patterns.
• 18:04
  So
• 18:04
  I
• 18:05
  love
• 18:05
  that
• 18:05
  you
• 18:05
  talked
• 18:05
  about
• 18:06
  patterns
• 18:06
  because,
• 18:07
  you
• 18:07
  know,
• 18:08
  it's
• 18:08
  the
• 18:08
  same
• 18:08
  thing
• 18:09
  when
• 18:09
  people
• 18:09
  come
• 18:09
  to
• 18:09
  me
• 18:09
  and
• 18:10
  they
• 18:10
  say,
• 18:10
  tammy,
• 18:10
  I
• 18:10
  need
• 18:11
  tea
• 18:11
  tree
• 18:11
  oil
• 18:11
  for
• 18:12
  my
• 18:12
  hair
• 18:12
  because
• 18:12
  it's
• 18:13
  falling
• 18:13
  out.
• 18:14
  Well,
• 18:14
  let's
• 18:14
  figure
• 18:15
  out
• 18:15
  why
• 18:15
  your
• 18:15
  hair
• 18:16
  is
• 18:16
  falling
• 18:16
  out.
• 18:16
  Because
• 18:17
  hair
• 18:17
  just
• 18:18
  doesn't
• 18:18
  fall
• 18:18
  out
• 18:18
  unless
• 18:19
  there's
• 18:19
  a
• 18:19
  reason.
• 18:20
  And
• 18:21
  nine
• 18:21
  out
• 18:22
  of
• 18:22
  ten
• 18:22
  of
• 18:22
  the
• 18:22
  things
• 18:22
  that
• 18:23
  I
• 18:23
  deal
• 18:23
  with
• 18:23
  go
• 18:24
  back
• 18:24
  to
• 18:24
  the
• 18:24
  chronic
• 18:24
  stress.
• 18:26
  So
• 18:26
  it's.
• 18:26
  It's
• 18:26
  like
• 18:27
  when
• 18:27
  people
• 18:27
  have,
• 18:27
  you
• 18:28
  know,
• 18:28
  physiological
• 18:29
  symptoms.
• 18:31
  Let's
• 18:31
  find
• 18:32
  the
• 18:32
  pattern
• 18:32
  that
• 18:32
  got
• 18:33
  you
• 18:33
  there
• 18:33
  and
• 18:34
  let's.
• 18:34
  It's.
• 18:35
  Life
• 18:35
  is
• 18:35
  about
• 18:35
  patterns.
• 18:37
  Yes,
• 18:37
  precisely.
• 18:38
  Yeah.
• 18:39
  Whatever
• 18:39
  it
• 18:40
  is.
• 18:40
  Right.
• 18:40
  We
• 18:41
  can
• 18:41
  find.
• 18:41
  Yeah.
• 18:42
  The
• 18:42
  pattern
• 18:42
  and
• 18:43
  the
• 18:43
  root.
• 18:44
  And
• 18:44
  that's
• 18:44
  really
• 18:44
  what
• 18:45
  this
• 18:45
  work
• 18:45
  is
• 18:45
  about,
• 18:46
  is
• 18:46
  about
• 18:46
  finding
• 18:47
  the
• 18:47
  root
• 18:48
  so
• 18:48
  that,
• 18:49
  as
• 18:49
  you
• 18:49
  said,
• 18:49
  like
• 18:49
  with
• 18:50
  the
• 18:50
  weed,
• 18:50
  you
• 18:50
  know,
• 18:51
  and
• 18:52
  having
• 18:52
  to
• 18:52
  go
• 18:52
  out
• 18:52
  there
• 18:52
  every
• 18:53
  four
• 18:53
  days,
• 18:53
  right.
• 18:54
  And
• 18:54
  pull.
• 18:54
  Pull
• 18:55
  those
• 18:55
  leaves.
• 18:56
  If
• 18:56
  you
• 18:56
  just
• 18:56
  take
• 18:57
  the
• 18:57
  time
• 18:58
  to
• 18:58
  pull
• 18:58
  them
• 18:58
  out,
• 18:59
  you
• 18:59
  know,
• 18:59
  from
• 19:00
  the
• 19:00
  root,
• 19:00
  then
• 19:00
  you're
• 19:01
  done.
• 19:01
  And
• 19:01
  that's
• 19:02
  the
• 19:02
  nice
• 19:02
  thing
• 19:02
  about
• 19:03
  doing
• 19:03
  the
• 19:03
  work
• 19:03
  correctly
• 19:04
  or,
• 19:04
  you
• 19:05
  know,
• 19:05
  in
• 19:05
  the
• 19:05
  most
• 19:05
  effective
• 19:06
  way,
• 19:06
  I
• 19:06
  should
• 19:07
  say,
• 19:07
  because
• 19:08
  you're
• 19:08
  not
• 19:08
  on
• 19:09
  that
• 19:09
  roller
• 19:09
  coaster
• 19:09
  where
• 19:10
  you're
• 19:10
  like,
• 19:10
  oh,
• 19:10
  it
• 19:10
  was
• 19:10
  good
• 19:11
  for
• 19:11
  six
• 19:11
  months,
• 19:11
  and
• 19:12
  then
• 19:12
  I
• 19:12
  fell
• 19:12
  off.
• 19:12
  And
• 19:13
  then,
• 19:13
  you
• 19:13
  know.
• 19:14
  But
• 19:14
  when
• 19:14
  you
• 19:14
  take
• 19:14
  the
• 19:14
  time
• 19:15
  to
• 19:15
  do
• 19:15
  it
• 19:15
  right,
• 19:15
  there
• 19:16
  is
• 19:16
  no
• 19:16
  back
• 19:16
  and
• 19:16
  forth
• 19:17
  for
• 19:17
  it.
• 19:17
  It's.
• 19:18
  It's
• 19:18
  forward.
• 19:18
  You
• 19:19
  might.
• 19:19
  You
• 19:19
  might
• 19:19
  have,
• 19:20
  you
• 19:20
  know,
• 19:20
  some
• 19:21
  dips
• 19:21
  in
• 19:21
  the
• 19:21
  road,
• 19:21
  whatever,
• 19:22
  but
• 19:22
  it's.
• 19:23
  It's
• 19:23
  not
• 19:23
  where
• 19:24
  you
• 19:24
  feel
• 19:24
  like
• 19:24
  you're.
• 19:25
  You're
• 19:25
  losing
• 19:26
  it
• 19:26
  all
• 19:26
  again
• 19:27
  and.
• 19:27
  Right.
• 19:28
  Yeah.
• 19:28
  And
• 19:28
  starting
• 19:29
  over
• 19:29
  from
• 19:29
  zero.
• 19:30
  Right.
• 19:31
  Because
• 19:31
  you
• 19:31
  start
• 19:31
  to
• 19:32
  make
• 19:32
  new.
• 19:32
  Like
• 19:32
  you
• 19:33
  said,
• 19:33
  you
• 19:33
  start
• 19:33
  to
• 19:33
  make
• 19:33
  new
• 19:34
  patterns.
• 19:34
  So
• 19:34
  now
• 19:35
  certain
• 19:35
  things
• 19:35
  that
• 19:36
  used
• 19:36
  to
• 19:36
  be
• 19:36
  a
• 19:36
  trigger
• 19:37
  are
• 19:37
  now
• 19:37
  can
• 19:38
  just
• 19:38
  integrate
• 19:38
  right
• 19:39
  into
• 19:39
  a
• 19:39
  deep
• 19:39
  breath,
• 19:40
  move
• 19:40
  on.
• 19:40
  You
• 19:41
  know,
• 19:41
  it's.
• 19:41
  So
• 19:42
  talk
• 19:42
  about
• 19:42
  some
• 19:42
  of
• 19:43
  the.
• 19:44
  What
• 19:44
  I
• 19:44
  know
• 19:44
  you
• 19:44
  have
• 19:45
  the.
• 19:45
  The
• 19:45
  freedom
• 19:46
  formula,
• 19:46
  and
• 19:47
  it
• 19:47
  started
• 19:47
  with
• 19:47
  the
• 19:47
  nervous
• 19:48
  system
• 19:48
  and
• 19:48
  everything.
• 19:48
  But
• 19:49
  what
• 19:49
  are
• 19:49
  some.
• 19:49
  I
• 19:50
  mean,
• 19:50
  share
• 19:50
  with
• 19:50
  the
• 19:50
  audience
• 19:51
  what
• 19:51
  are
• 19:51
  some
• 19:52
  of
• 19:52
  the
• 19:52
  things
• 19:53
  that
• 19:53
  you
• 19:53
  tried
• 19:54
  and
• 19:54
  used
• 19:55
  was
• 19:56
  as
• 19:56
  far
• 19:56
  as,
• 19:56
  like,
• 19:57
  modalities
• 19:57
  or
• 19:57
  what
• 19:58
  different
• 19:58
  things
• 19:58
  that
• 19:58
  you
• 19:58
  did
• 19:59
  personally?
• 20:00
  Yeah,
• 20:01
  so
• 20:01
  I
• 20:01
  did
• 20:01
  try
• 20:02
  a
• 20:02
  lot.
• 20:02
  And.
• 20:03
  And
• 20:03
  I
• 20:03
  think
• 20:03
  that
• 20:04
  when
• 20:04
  we
• 20:04
  have
• 20:05
  that
• 20:05
  discussion,
• 20:05
  like,
• 20:06
  you
• 20:06
  know,
• 20:06
  what
• 20:06
  did
• 20:06
  you
• 20:07
  try?
• 20:07
  We
• 20:07
  have
• 20:07
  people
• 20:07
  out
• 20:08
  there
• 20:08
  telling
• 20:08
  us
• 20:09
  how
• 20:09
  wonderful
• 20:10
  tapping
• 20:10
  is,
• 20:11
  how
• 20:11
  wonderful
• 20:11
  somatic
• 20:12
  experiencing
• 20:12
  is,
• 20:13
  how
• 20:13
  wonderful
• 20:13
  breath
• 20:14
  work,
• 20:14
  how
• 20:14
  wonderful
• 20:15
  meditation.
• 20:15
  So
• 20:16
  much,
• 20:16
  all
• 20:16
  the
• 20:17
  things.
• 20:18
  Right.
• 20:18
  And
• 20:18
  it
• 20:18
  drove.
• 20:19
  I
• 20:19
  lost
• 20:19
  my
• 20:20
  mind
• 20:20
  because
• 20:20
  I
• 20:20
  was
• 20:21
  reading,
• 20:22
  you
• 20:22
  know,
• 20:22
  or
• 20:22
  taking
• 20:23
  courses
• 20:23
  or
• 20:23
  doing
• 20:24
  something
• 20:24
  where
• 20:24
  I
• 20:24
  was
• 20:24
  trying
• 20:25
  to
• 20:25
  implement,
• 20:25
  you
• 20:26
  know,
• 20:26
  about
• 20:26
  25
• 20:27
  things
• 20:27
  all
• 20:27
  at
• 20:27
  the
• 20:28
  same
• 20:28
  time.
• 20:28
  Right.
• 20:29
  And,
• 20:29
  and
• 20:29
  it's
• 20:30
  so
• 20:30
  confusing
• 20:30
  because
• 20:31
  you're
• 20:31
  like,
• 20:31
  well,
• 20:31
  if
• 20:31
  I
• 20:32
  attach
• 20:32
  myself
• 20:33
  to
• 20:33
  this,
• 20:33
  then
• 20:34
  what
• 20:34
  about
• 20:34
  that?
• 20:34
  You
• 20:35
  know,
• 20:35
  we're
• 20:35
  bouncing
• 20:35
  around
• 20:36
  a
• 20:36
  lot.
• 20:36
  And
• 20:36
  I
• 20:36
  think
• 20:37
  at
• 20:37
  the
• 20:37
  end
• 20:37
  of
• 20:37
  the
• 20:37
  day,
• 20:38
  you
• 20:38
  know,
• 20:38
  it's
• 20:39
  really
• 20:39
  about
• 20:40
  understanding
• 20:41
  our
• 20:41
  own
• 20:42
  systems,
• 20:43
  being
• 20:43
  willing
• 20:44
  to
• 20:45
  try
• 20:45
  something,
• 20:46
  try
• 20:46
  it
• 20:46
  in
• 20:47
  a
• 20:47
  way
• 20:47
  that
• 20:47
  is,
• 20:48
  that
• 20:48
  is
• 20:48
  reasonable.
• 20:49
  Not
• 20:49
  try
• 20:49
  something
• 20:50
  once
• 20:51
  and
• 20:51
  be
• 20:51
  like,
• 20:51
  yep,
• 20:51
  nope,
• 20:52
  that
• 20:52
  didn't
• 20:52
  work
• 20:52
  for
• 20:52
  me.
• 20:53
  Right,
• 20:53
  right.
• 20:54
  About
• 20:54
  getting
• 20:54
  to
• 20:55
  know
• 20:55
  your
• 20:55
  system
• 20:56
  instead
• 20:56
  of
• 20:56
  saying,
• 20:57
  okay,
• 20:57
  I'm
• 20:57
  going
• 20:57
  to
• 20:58
  use
• 20:58
  this
• 20:58
  tool.
• 20:58
  It's
• 20:59
  going
• 20:59
  to
• 20:59
  change
• 20:59
  me.
• 21:00
  Understanding,
• 21:01
  wow.
• 21:02
  The.
• 21:02
  As
• 21:02
  a
• 21:02
  first
• 21:03
  step,
• 21:03
  you
• 21:03
  know,
• 21:03
  what
• 21:03
  is
• 21:04
  going
• 21:04
  on
• 21:04
  in
• 21:04
  my
• 21:04
  body
• 21:05
  when
• 21:05
  I
• 21:06
  tune
• 21:06
  in.
• 21:07
  It's
• 21:07
  surprising
• 21:07
  how
• 21:07
  many
• 21:08
  of
• 21:08
  us
• 21:08
  just
• 21:08
  live
• 21:08
  from,
• 21:09
  from
• 21:09
  the
• 21:09
  neck
• 21:09
  up
• 21:10
  and
• 21:10
  we
• 21:10
  don't
• 21:10
  even
• 21:11
  know
• 21:12
  we
• 21:12
  have
• 21:12
  a
• 21:12
  body.
• 21:12
  And
• 21:13
  that
• 21:13
  was
• 21:13
  me.
• 21:13
  I
• 21:14
  did
• 21:14
  not
• 21:14
  want
• 21:14
  to
• 21:15
  be
• 21:15
  in
• 21:15
  my
• 21:15
  body.
• 21:15
  That's
• 21:16
  where
• 21:16
  all
• 21:16
  the
• 21:16
  pain,
• 21:17
  that's
• 21:17
  where
• 21:17
  all
• 21:17
  the
• 21:17
  scariness
• 21:18
  lived.
• 21:18
  I
• 21:19
  didn't
• 21:19
  want
• 21:19
  to
• 21:19
  be
• 21:19
  there
• 21:19
  at
• 21:19
  all.
• 21:20
  But
• 21:20
  I
• 21:20
  didn't
• 21:20
  know
• 21:20
  I
• 21:20
  wasn't
• 21:21
  in
• 21:21
  my
• 21:21
  body
• 21:21
  because
• 21:22
  since
• 21:22
  it
• 21:22
  started
• 21:23
  so
• 21:23
  early,
• 21:23
  I
• 21:23
  just,
• 21:24
  that's
• 21:24
  who
• 21:24
  I
• 21:24
  was
• 21:25
  and
• 21:25
  what
• 21:25
  was
• 21:26
  normal
• 21:26
  for
• 21:26
  me.
• 21:27
  So
• 21:28
  one
• 21:28
  of
• 21:28
  the
• 21:29
  things
• 21:29
  that,
• 21:29
  that
• 21:29
  I
• 21:30
  finally
• 21:30
  learned
• 21:30
  after
• 21:31
  many
• 21:31
  years
• 21:31
  of,
• 21:31
  of
• 21:32
  just
• 21:32
  turning
• 21:32
  to
• 21:33
  tool
• 21:33
  after
• 21:33
  tool
• 21:34
  was
• 21:34
  that
• 21:35
  I
• 21:35
  had
• 21:35
  to
• 21:37
  be
• 21:37
  willing
• 21:38
  to
• 21:38
  be
• 21:39
  inside
• 21:40
  and
• 21:41
  be
• 21:41
  embodied
• 21:42
  and,
• 21:42
  and
• 21:42
  be
• 21:43
  aware
• 21:43
  of
• 21:44
  what
• 21:44
  was
• 21:44
  happening
• 21:45
  in
• 21:45
  my
• 21:45
  body.
• 21:46
  And
• 21:47
  that
• 21:47
  was
• 21:48
  really
• 21:48
  just
• 21:49
  such
• 21:49
  a
• 21:50
  foundational
• 21:50
  stuff.
• 21:50
  We
• 21:50
  can't
• 21:51
  skip
• 21:51
  that.
• 21:52
  That
• 21:52
  has
• 21:52
  to
• 21:53
  happen.
• 21:54
  That's
• 21:54
  where
• 21:54
  safety
• 21:55
  lives,
• 21:56
  so.
• 21:57
  Exactly.
• 21:57
  I
• 21:57
  mean,
• 21:58
  you
• 21:58
  just
• 21:58
  said
• 21:58
  it.
• 21:58
  That's
• 21:58
  where
• 21:59
  safety
• 21:59
  lives.
• 21:59
  And
• 22:00
  until
• 22:00
  you
• 22:00
  feel
• 22:00
  safe
• 22:01
  in
• 22:01
  your
• 22:01
  body.
• 22:02
  And
• 22:03
  I
• 22:03
  love
• 22:03
  that
• 22:04
  and
• 22:04
  I
• 22:04
  love
• 22:04
  the.
• 22:06
  Like
• 22:06
  you
• 22:06
  said,
• 22:06
  just
• 22:07
  be
• 22:07
  aware.
• 22:07
  And
• 22:08
  I've
• 22:08
  had
• 22:08
  people
• 22:08
  say
• 22:08
  to
• 22:08
  me,
• 22:09
  I
• 22:09
  wake
• 22:09
  up
• 22:09
  3am
• 22:10
  in
• 22:10
  the
• 22:10
  morning
• 22:10
  and
• 22:10
  I
• 22:10
  can't
• 22:11
  get
• 22:11
  back
• 22:11
  to
• 22:11
  sleep.
• 22:12
  And
• 22:12
  it's
• 22:12
  like
• 22:13
  I
• 22:13
  say,
• 22:13
  well,
• 22:13
  what
• 22:13
  do
• 22:13
  you,
• 22:14
  what
• 22:14
  do
• 22:14
  you
• 22:14
  try?
• 22:14
  Well,
• 22:15
  I
• 22:15
  tried
• 22:16
  telling
• 22:16
  myself
• 22:16
  I'm
• 22:17
  safe
• 22:17
  and
• 22:17
  I
• 22:17
  try
• 22:17
  doing
• 22:18
  this
• 22:18
  and
• 22:18
  I
• 22:18
  try
• 22:18
  doing
• 22:18
  that,
• 22:18
  and
• 22:19
  I
• 22:19
  try
• 22:19
  doing
• 22:19
  this
• 22:19
  and
• 22:19
  I'm
• 22:20
  like,
• 22:20
  get
• 22:20
  out
• 22:20
  of
• 22:20
  your
• 22:20
  head
• 22:21
  and
• 22:21
  into
• 22:21
  your
• 22:21
  body.
• 22:22
  First
• 22:22
  thing
• 22:23
  you
• 22:23
  know,
• 22:23
  get
• 22:23
  out
• 22:24
  of
• 22:24
  your
• 22:24
  head
• 22:24
  and
• 22:24
  into
• 22:24
  your
• 22:25
  body.
• 22:25
  Because
• 22:25
  the
• 22:25
  more
• 22:25
  you
• 22:25
  try
• 22:26
  to
• 22:26
  convince
• 22:26
  yourself
• 22:27
  what
• 22:27
  you're
• 22:27
  supposed
• 22:27
  to
• 22:27
  be
• 22:27
  doing.
• 22:28
  You
• 22:28
  get,
• 22:28
  now
• 22:29
  you're
• 22:29
  getting
• 22:29
  angry
• 22:29
  at
• 22:29
  yourself
• 22:30
  for
• 22:30
  not
• 22:30
  doing
• 22:30
  it.
• 22:31
  So
• 22:31
  I'm
• 22:31
  just
• 22:31
  like,
• 22:32
  just
• 22:32
  try,
• 22:32
  try
• 22:33
  starting
• 22:33
  at
• 22:33
  your
• 22:33
  toes
• 22:34
  and,
• 22:34
  and
• 22:34
  squinching
• 22:35
  your
• 22:35
  muscles
• 22:35
  and
• 22:36
  then
• 22:36
  relaxing
• 22:36
  them
• 22:37
  and
• 22:37
  just,
• 22:37
  just
• 22:38
  go
• 22:38
  all
• 22:38
  the
• 22:38
  way
• 22:38
  up
• 22:38
  your
• 22:38
  body.
• 22:39
  How'd
• 22:39
  you
• 22:39
  feel?
• 22:40
  Oh
• 22:40
  my
• 22:40
  gosh,
• 22:40
  I
• 22:40
  felt
• 22:41
  great.
• 22:42
  Because
• 22:42
  it
• 22:42
  was
• 22:42
  getting
• 22:42
  out
• 22:43
  of
• 22:43
  your
• 22:43
  mind
• 22:43
  and
• 22:44
  into
• 22:44
  your
• 22:44
  body
• 22:45
  and
• 22:45
  that
• 22:45
  is
• 22:45
  critical
• 22:46
  to
• 22:46
  the
• 22:46
  whole
• 22:47
  process.
• 22:47
  And
• 22:47
  that's
• 22:47
  why,
• 22:47
  you
• 22:48
  know,
• 22:48
  and
• 22:48
  there's,
• 22:48
  there's
• 22:49
  challenges
• 22:49
  with
• 22:49
  that.
• 22:49
  Right.
• 22:50
  And,
• 22:50
  and
• 22:50
  there's
• 22:51
  so
• 22:51
  many
• 22:51
  different
• 22:51
  ways
• 22:52
  to
• 22:52
  help
• 22:53
  you
• 22:53
  do
• 22:53
  that.
• 22:54
  But
• 22:54
  I
• 22:55
  never
• 22:55
  start
• 22:55
  with
• 22:55
  the
• 22:55
  ways.
• 22:56
  I
• 22:56
  start
• 22:56
  with
• 22:56
  the
• 22:57
  understanding
• 22:57
  that
• 22:57
  we
• 22:58
  have
• 22:58
  to
• 22:58
  open
• 22:59
  up
• 22:59
  to
• 23:00
  and,
• 23:00
  and
• 23:01
  notice
• 23:01
  what's
• 23:02
  there.
• 23:02
  Because
• 23:03
  rather
• 23:03
  than,
• 23:04
  than,
• 23:04
  than
• 23:04
  be
• 23:05
  prescriptive
• 23:06
  with
• 23:06
  a
• 23:06
  tool,
• 23:07
  I
• 23:07
  want
• 23:07
  your
• 23:07
  body
• 23:08
  to
• 23:08
  tell
• 23:09
  you
• 23:09
  what
• 23:10
  tool
• 23:10
  it
• 23:10
  wants
• 23:11
  to
• 23:11
  use
• 23:12
  and,
• 23:12
  and
• 23:12
  for
• 23:13
  you
• 23:13
  to
• 23:13
  have
• 23:13
  a
• 23:13
  big
• 23:13
  tool
• 23:14
  belt
• 23:14
  of
• 23:15
  things,
• 23:15
  you
• 23:15
  know.
• 23:15
  Oh,
• 23:16
  I
• 23:16
  really
• 23:16
  like
• 23:16
  this.
• 23:17
  And
• 23:17
  I
• 23:17
  do
• 23:17
  use
• 23:18
  a
• 23:18
  lot
• 23:18
  of
• 23:18
  somatic
• 23:18
  experiencing
• 23:19
  practices.
• 23:20
  You
• 23:20
  know,
• 23:20
  when
• 23:20
  I'm,
• 23:21
  when
• 23:21
  I'm
• 23:21
  angry,
• 23:21
  I
• 23:22
  like
• 23:22
  this
• 23:22
  tool.
• 23:22
  When
• 23:23
  I
• 23:23
  won't,
• 23:23
  you
• 23:23
  know,
• 23:24
  I'm
• 23:24
  feeling
• 23:24
  this,
• 23:24
  it.
• 23:26
  How.
• 23:26
  You
• 23:26
  know,
• 23:26
  we
• 23:26
  often
• 23:26
  think
• 23:27
  of
• 23:27
  our,
• 23:27
  our
• 23:27
  body
• 23:28
  based
• 23:28
  tools
• 23:29
  as
• 23:30
  I
• 23:30
  use
• 23:30
  this
• 23:30
  to
• 23:31
  calm
• 23:31
  me
• 23:31
  down.
• 23:32
  Well,
• 23:33
  that's
• 23:34
  might
• 23:34
  be
• 23:34
  nice
• 23:34
  sometimes,
• 23:35
  you
• 23:35
  know,
• 23:35
  but
• 23:36
  we
• 23:36
  don't
• 23:36
  ever
• 23:36
  approach,
• 23:37
  I
• 23:37
  don't
• 23:37
  anyway
• 23:38
  approach
• 23:38
  a
• 23:39
  tool
• 23:39
  or,
• 23:40
  or
• 23:40
  my
• 23:40
  body.
• 23:40
  Like
• 23:41
  if
• 23:41
  my
• 23:41
  body's
• 23:41
  having
• 23:41
  an
• 23:42
  experience
• 23:42
  of
• 23:43
  being
• 23:43
  super
• 23:43
  stressed,
• 23:45
  I'm
• 23:45
  actually
• 23:45
  not
• 23:46
  going
• 23:46
  to
• 23:46
  go
• 23:46
  and
• 23:47
  do
• 23:47
  some
• 23:47
  breathing
• 23:48
  exercises
• 23:48
  that
• 23:48
  help
• 23:49
  calm
• 23:49
  me
• 23:49
  down.
• 23:50
  I'm
• 23:51
  going
• 23:51
  to
• 23:51
  do
• 23:52
  something
• 23:52
  that
• 23:52
  helps
• 23:53
  me
• 23:53
  process
• 23:53
  and
• 23:54
  metabolize
• 23:55
  that
• 23:55
  energy.
• 23:55
  Because
• 23:56
  when
• 23:56
  I
• 23:56
  tell
• 23:56
  my
• 23:57
  stop
• 23:58
  being
• 23:58
  stressed,
• 23:59
  stop
• 23:59
  being
• 23:59
  anxious,
• 24:00
  you
• 24:00
  know,
• 24:01
  my
• 24:01
  body's
• 24:01
  like,
• 24:02
  hello,
• 24:03
  there's
• 24:03
  actual
• 24:04
  danger
• 24:04
  here.
• 24:04
  Like
• 24:04
  there's
• 24:05
  a
• 24:05
  reason
• 24:05
  why
• 24:06
  I'm
• 24:06
  feeling
• 24:06
  this
• 24:06
  way.
• 24:07
  So
• 24:07
  don't
• 24:07
  tell
• 24:08
  me,
• 24:09
  just
• 24:09
  calm
• 24:09
  down,
• 24:10
  you
• 24:10
  know.
• 24:10
  Right.
• 24:10
  No,
• 24:11
  yeah.
• 24:11
  So
• 24:12
  that's
• 24:12
  the
• 24:12
  worst
• 24:12
  thing
• 24:12
  you
• 24:13
  can
• 24:13
  do.
• 24:13
  Exactly.
• 24:14
  And
• 24:14
  it's
• 24:15
  funny
• 24:15
  because
• 24:15
  they
• 24:15
  think
• 24:15
  that
• 24:15
  they're
• 24:16
  failing
• 24:16
  because
• 24:16
  they're
• 24:17
  not
• 24:17
  doing
• 24:17
  their
• 24:17
  meditation.
• 24:18
  I
• 24:18
  had
• 24:18
  a
• 24:18
  conversation
• 24:19
  yesterday.
• 24:20
  Oh,
• 24:20
  I'm
• 24:20
  really
• 24:21
  stressed
• 24:21
  out.
• 24:21
  I'm
• 24:21
  having
• 24:22
  all
• 24:22
  these,
• 24:22
  you
• 24:22
  know,
• 24:22
  and,
• 24:23
  and
• 24:23
  of
• 24:23
  course
• 24:23
  I'm
• 24:23
  not
• 24:24
  doing
• 24:24
  my
• 24:24
  breathing
• 24:24
  in
• 24:24
  my
• 24:24
  meditation.
• 24:25
  So
• 24:25
  I
• 24:25
  really
• 24:26
  need
• 24:26
  to
• 24:26
  get
• 24:26
  back
• 24:26
  to
• 24:26
  that.
• 24:27
  And
• 24:27
  oh,
• 24:27
  you
• 24:28
  know,
• 24:28
  in
• 24:28
  this
• 24:29
  judgment
• 24:29
  around
• 24:29
  not
• 24:30
  doing,
• 24:30
  I
• 24:30
  said
• 24:30
  no,
• 24:31
  your
• 24:31
  body
• 24:31
  doesn't
• 24:32
  want
• 24:32
  breathing
• 24:33
  and
• 24:33
  meditation.
• 24:34
  It
• 24:34
  wants
• 24:35
  to
• 24:35
  use
• 24:35
  this
• 24:36
  energy.
• 24:36
  Right.
• 24:37
  You
• 24:37
  were
• 24:37
  pumping
• 24:38
  with
• 24:38
  it
• 24:38
  with
• 24:39
  the
• 24:39
  cortisol
• 24:39
  and
• 24:39
  the
• 24:39
  adrenaline
• 24:40
  and
• 24:40
  then
• 24:40
  we're
• 24:40
  like
• 24:41
  just
• 24:41
  be
• 24:42
  nice,
• 24:42
  just
• 24:42
  you
• 24:43
  know,
• 24:44
  turn
• 24:44
  that
• 24:44
  off.
• 24:45
  I'm
• 24:45
  actually
• 24:45
  in
• 24:45
  the
• 24:45
  middle
• 24:45
  of
• 24:45
  like
• 24:46
  a
• 24:46
  30
• 24:46
  day
• 24:46
  nervous
• 24:47
  system
• 24:47
  reset
• 24:47
  thing
• 24:48
  I'm
• 24:48
  doing
• 24:48
  on
• 24:48
  Instagram,
• 24:49
  just
• 24:49
  because
• 24:49
  I
• 24:49
  hate
• 24:49
  being
• 24:49
  live
• 24:50
  on
• 24:50
  Instagram.
• 24:50
  So
• 24:50
  I
• 24:51
  thought,
• 24:51
  well,
• 24:51
  I
• 24:51
  better
• 24:51
  do
• 24:51
  it.
• 24:52
  So
• 24:52
  just
• 24:52
  to
• 24:53
  get
• 24:53
  on
• 24:53
  live,
• 24:53
  you
• 24:53
  know,
• 24:53
  just
• 24:54
  to
• 24:54
  practice.
• 24:55
  But
• 24:55
  it's,
• 24:55
  it's
• 24:56
  so
• 24:56
  different
• 24:56
  how
• 24:57
  everyone
• 24:57
  is
• 24:57
  like
• 24:58
  some
• 24:58
  is,
• 24:58
  you
• 24:58
  know,
• 24:58
  breathe
• 24:59
  in
• 24:59
  and
• 24:59
  slow
• 25:00
  down.
• 25:00
  This
• 25:00
  morning
• 25:00
  was
• 25:01
  shake
• 25:01
  it
• 25:01
  out.
• 25:01
  Like
• 25:02
  literally,
• 25:02
  like
• 25:02
  just
• 25:03
  shake
• 25:03
  it
• 25:03
  out.
• 25:03
  You
• 25:03
  know,
• 25:04
  we
• 25:04
  talked
• 25:04
  about
• 25:04
  an
• 25:04
  animal
• 25:05
  instinct.
• 25:05
  Sometimes
• 25:06
  it's
• 25:06
  like
• 25:06
  I
• 25:06
  tell
• 25:07
  people,
• 25:07
  though,
• 25:07
  you
• 25:08
  know,
• 25:08
  like
• 25:09
  you
• 25:09
  said,
• 25:09
  you
• 25:09
  just
• 25:09
  have
• 25:10
  to
• 25:10
  be.
• 25:11
  It's
• 25:12
  inside.
• 25:12
  So
• 25:13
  sometimes
• 25:13
  if
• 25:13
  you
• 25:13
  just
• 25:13
  put
• 25:14
  one
• 25:14
  hand
• 25:14
  on
• 25:14
  your
• 25:14
  heart
• 25:14
  and
• 25:15
  put
• 25:15
  one
• 25:15
  hand
• 25:15
  on
• 25:15
  your
• 25:15
  belly
• 25:16
  and
• 25:16
  say,
• 25:16
  what
• 25:16
  do
• 25:17
  I
• 25:17
  need
• 25:17
  right
• 25:17
  now?
• 25:18
  That's
• 25:18
  when
• 25:18
  you
• 25:18
  know
• 25:19
  you've
• 25:19
  hit
• 25:19
  the
• 25:19
  jackpot,
• 25:20
  because
• 25:21
  then
• 25:21
  you
• 25:21
  have
• 25:21
  someone,
• 25:22
  right?
• 25:23
  And
• 25:23
  in
• 25:23
  my
• 25:23
  mind,
• 25:23
  that
• 25:24
  is
• 25:24
  the
• 25:24
  highest
• 25:25
  form
• 25:26
  of
• 25:26
  attunement,
• 25:27
  right?
• 25:59
  I
• 25:59
  have
• 25:59
  somebody
• 25:59
  right
• 26:00
  here
• 26:00
  beside
• 26:01
  me,
• 26:02
  100
• 26:02
  of
• 26:03
  the
• 26:03
  time,
• 26:03
  100
• 26:04
  devoted
• 26:05
  to
• 26:05
  me,
• 26:05
  that
• 26:06
  wants
• 26:07
  nothing
• 26:07
  more
• 26:07
  than
• 26:08
  to
• 26:08
  understand
• 26:08
  what
• 26:08
  I
• 26:08
  need
• 26:09
  and
• 26:09
  provide
• 26:09
  it,
• 25:39
  you
• 26:10
  know,
• 26:10
  so
• 26:11
  when
• 26:11
  we
• 26:11
  can
• 26:11
  tune
• 26:11
  into
• 26:12
  the
• 26:12
  body
• 26:12
  and
• 26:12
  the
• 26:12
  body's
• 26:13
  like,
• 26:13
  shake,
• 26:15
  and
• 26:15
  you're
• 26:15
  like,
• 26:16
  I'm
• 26:16
  on
• 26:16
  it,
• 26:17
  you
• 26:17
  know,
• 26:17
  and
• 26:17
  you,
• 26:17
  and
• 26:18
  you
• 26:18
  respond
• 26:18
  to
• 26:19
  that
• 26:19
  lovingly.
• 26:20
  That's
• 26:20
  the
• 26:21
  goal.
• 26:21
  The
• 26:22
  goal
• 26:22
  is
• 26:22
  not
• 26:22
  to
• 26:22
  calm
• 26:23
  the
• 26:23
  body.
• 26:23
  The
• 26:23
  goal
• 26:23
  is
• 26:24
  not
• 26:24
  to,
• 26:24
  you
• 26:25
  know,
• 26:25
  achieve
• 26:25
  some
• 26:26
  certain
• 26:26
  state.
• 26:26
  The
• 26:27
  goal
• 26:27
  is
• 26:27
  to
• 26:28
  hear
• 26:29
  and
• 26:29
  respond.
• 26:29
  And
• 26:30
  when
• 26:30
  you
• 26:30
  do
• 26:30
  that,
• 26:31
  you
• 26:31
  bring
• 26:32
  safety.
• 26:32
  So,
• 26:33
  yeah,
• 26:33
  so
• 26:34
  as
• 26:34
  far
• 26:34
  as,
• 26:34
  you
• 26:34
  know,
• 26:35
  what
• 26:35
  were
• 26:35
  some
• 26:35
  of
• 26:35
  the
• 26:35
  tools?
• 26:36
  I
• 26:36
  tried
• 26:36
  them
• 26:37
  all
• 26:37
  and
• 26:38
  now
• 26:38
  I
• 26:39
  use
• 26:40
  many,
• 26:40
  many
• 26:41
  different
• 26:41
  tools,
• 26:42
  but
• 26:42
  in
• 26:43
  response
• 26:43
  to
• 26:44
  my
• 26:44
  system,
• 26:44
  as
• 26:45
  opposed
• 26:45
  to,
• 26:46
  you
• 26:47
  know,
• 26:47
  giving
• 26:47
  it
• 26:47
  and
• 26:48
  making
• 26:48
  it
• 26:48
  prescriptive,
• 26:49
  telling
• 26:49
  the
• 26:49
  system,
• 26:50
  this
• 26:50
  is
• 26:50
  what,
• 26:51
  this
• 26:51
  is
• 26:51
  what
• 26:51
  we're
• 26:51
  doing
• 26:52
  and
• 26:52
  this
• 26:52
  is
• 26:52
  how
• 26:52
  you're
• 26:52
  supposed
• 26:53
  to
• 26:53
  feel.
• 26:54
  No,
• 26:54
  the
• 26:54
  system
• 26:55
  leads
• 26:55
  and
• 26:55
  tells
• 26:56
  you
• 26:56
  what
• 26:56
  it
• 26:56
  is
• 26:57
  that
• 26:57
  it,
• 26:57
  that
• 26:57
  it
• 26:57
  needs.
• 26:57
  And
• 26:58
  when
• 26:58
  you
• 26:58
  respond,
• 26:59
  you
• 26:59
  build
• 26:59
  that
• 27:00
  safety
• 27:00
  and
• 27:00
  that
• 27:00
  trust
• 27:01
  and,
• 27:02
  and
• 27:02
  then,
• 27:03
  you
• 27:03
  know,
• 27:03
  you,
• 27:03
  you
• 27:04
  do
• 27:04
  hear
• 27:05
  your,
• 27:05
  your
• 27:05
  inner
• 27:06
  compass
• 27:06
  and,
• 27:06
  and
• 27:07
  your
• 27:07
  wisdom,
• 27:08
  right?
• 27:09
  And
• 27:09
  of
• 27:09
  course,
• 27:09
  it
• 27:09
  doesn't
• 27:10
  hurt
• 27:10
  to
• 27:10
  have,
• 27:10
  you
• 27:11
  know,
• 27:11
  people
• 27:11
  will
• 27:11
  Google,
• 27:12
  I'm
• 27:12
  having
• 27:12
  an
• 27:12
  anxiety
• 27:13
  attack.
• 27:13
  What
• 27:13
  do
• 27:13
  I
• 27:13
  do?
• 27:15
  It
• 27:15
  doesn't
• 27:15
  hurt
• 27:15
  to
• 27:15
  have
• 27:16
  some
• 27:16
  of
• 27:16
  these
• 27:16
  tools
• 27:17
  in
• 27:17
  your
• 27:17
  tool
• 27:17
  belt
• 27:18
  just
• 27:18
  as
• 27:19
  options,
• 27:19
  but
• 27:20
  you
• 27:20
  still
• 27:20
  have
• 27:21
  to
• 27:21
  see
• 27:21
  what
• 27:21
  works
• 27:22
  for
• 27:22
  you.
• 27:22
  The
• 27:23
  biggest
• 27:23
  one
• 27:23
  I
• 27:23
  use
• 27:24
  is
• 27:24
  a
• 27:24
  panic
• 27:24
  attack,
• 27:25
  because
• 27:25
  I
• 27:25
  remember
• 27:26
  when
• 27:26
  I
• 27:26
  used
• 27:26
  to
• 27:26
  have
• 27:26
  panic
• 27:27
  attacks,
• 27:28
  someone
• 27:28
  telling
• 27:28
  me
• 27:29
  to
• 27:29
  take
• 27:29
  a
• 27:29
  deep
• 27:29
  breath.
• 27:30
  That
• 27:30
  was
• 27:30
  the
• 27:30
  worst
• 27:30
  thing
• 27:31
  I
• 27:31
  could
• 27:31
  have
• 27:31
  done
• 27:31
  because
• 27:31
  I
• 27:32
  thought
• 27:32
  I
• 27:32
  was
• 27:32
  choking
• 27:32
  anyway.
• 27:33
  So
• 27:34
  if
• 27:34
  I
• 27:34
  can't
• 27:34
  breathe
• 27:35
  and
• 27:35
  I
• 27:35
  feel
• 27:35
  like
• 27:35
  I'm
• 27:36
  dying,
• 27:36
  why
• 27:36
  would
• 27:36
  I
• 27:37
  hold
• 27:37
  my.
• 27:39
  Frustrates
• 27:40
  me
• 27:40
  is
• 27:41
  because
• 27:41
  people
• 27:41
  will
• 27:42
  try
• 27:42
  it,
• 27:42
  they
• 27:43
  won't
• 27:43
  have
• 27:43
  a
• 27:43
  good
• 27:44
  result.
• 27:44
  They'll
• 27:44
  think,
• 27:45
  this
• 27:45
  doesn't
• 27:46
  work.
• 27:46
  Right.
• 27:47
  So
• 27:47
  now
• 27:47
  they've.
• 27:48
  They've
• 27:48
  now
• 27:49
  do
• 27:49
  not
• 27:49
  have
• 27:50
  that
• 27:50
  as
• 27:50
  a
• 27:50
  possible
• 27:51
  modality,
• 27:52
  which
• 27:52
  could
• 27:53
  be
• 27:53
  very
• 27:53
  helpful
• 27:53
  in
• 27:53
  the
• 27:54
  right
• 27:54
  situation.
• 27:54
  In
• 27:54
  the
• 27:55
  right
• 27:55
  situation.
• 27:55
  Right.
• 27:56
  Or
• 27:56
  they
• 27:57
  think
• 27:58
  I'm
• 27:58
  the
• 27:58
  problem.
• 27:59
  Right.
• 27:59
  I.
• 28:00
  I'm
• 28:00
  so
• 28:00
  broken
• 28:01
  that
• 28:01
  these
• 28:02
  tools
• 28:02
  that
• 28:02
  are
• 28:02
  out
• 28:03
  there
• 28:03
  for
• 28:03
  everyone
• 28:03
  else
• 28:04
  to
• 28:04
  use
• 28:05
  and
• 28:05
  that
• 28:05
  seem
• 28:06
  to
• 28:06
  work
• 28:06
  for
• 28:06
  the
• 28:06
  rest
• 28:06
  of
• 28:07
  the
• 28:07
  world
• 28:08
  don't
• 28:08
  work
• 28:08
  for
• 28:08
  me.
• 28:09
  Yep.
• 28:10
  Yeah.
• 28:11
  So
• 28:11
  I
• 28:11
  have.
• 28:12
  I
• 28:12
  want
• 28:12
  you
• 28:12
  to
• 28:12
  give
• 28:12
  your
• 28:13
  perspective
• 28:13
  on
• 28:13
  this,
• 28:13
  because
• 28:14
  I
• 28:14
  do
• 28:14
  get
• 28:14
  a
• 28:14
  lot
• 28:14
  of
• 28:14
  questions
• 28:15
  about
• 28:15
  this
• 28:15
  with
• 28:15
  people.
• 28:16
  Then
• 28:16
  a
• 28:16
  lot
• 28:16
  of
• 28:16
  my
• 28:16
  podcasts
• 28:17
  are
• 28:17
  geared
• 28:18
  towards
• 28:18
  people
• 28:18
  that
• 28:18
  I
• 28:18
  work
• 28:19
  with,
• 28:19
  because
• 28:19
  sometimes
• 28:20
  it's
• 28:20
  like
• 28:20
  I
• 28:20
  feel
• 28:21
  like
• 28:21
  when
• 28:21
  I
• 28:21
  talk
• 28:21
  to
• 28:21
  them
• 28:23
  and
• 28:24
  then
• 28:24
  they
• 28:24
  hear
• 28:24
  from
• 28:24
  someone
• 28:24
  else,
• 28:24
  they're
• 28:25
  like,
• 28:25
  oh,
• 28:25
  that's
• 28:25
  what
• 28:25
  you
• 28:26
  were
• 28:26
  trying
• 28:26
  to
• 28:26
  say.
• 28:26
  I'm
• 28:26
  like,
• 28:28
  but
• 28:28
  anyway,
• 28:29
  when
• 28:29
  you
• 28:30
  get
• 28:30
  to
• 28:30
  that
• 28:30
  point
• 28:30
  where
• 28:31
  you're
• 28:33
  feeling
• 28:33
  it
• 28:34
  in
• 28:34
  your
• 28:34
  body,
• 28:35
  your
• 28:36
  natural
• 28:36
  instinct
• 28:37
  is
• 28:37
  to
• 28:37
  do
• 28:37
  what?
• 28:37
  To
• 28:38
  do,
• 28:38
  run
• 28:38
  away
• 28:38
  from
• 28:39
  it,
• 28:39
  that
• 28:40
  feeling.
• 28:41
  What
• 28:41
  is
• 28:41
  your
• 28:42
  suggestion
• 28:42
  for
• 28:43
  that?
• 28:44
  Yeah,
• 28:45
  so
• 28:45
  this
• 28:45
  is.
• 28:46
  This
• 28:46
  is
• 28:46
  such
• 28:46
  a
• 28:47
  great
• 28:47
  question,
• 28:48
  because
• 28:48
  it's
• 28:48
  going
• 28:48
  to
• 28:49
  happen,
• 28:49
  and
• 28:50
  it's
• 28:50
  going
• 28:50
  to
• 28:50
  happen
• 28:50
  in,
• 28:51
  you
• 28:51
  know,
• 28:51
  to
• 28:51
  some
• 28:51
  degree.
• 28:51
  I
• 28:52
  mean,
• 28:52
  have
• 28:52
  people
• 28:53
  in
• 28:53
  myself,
• 28:54
  too.
• 28:54
  I
• 28:55
  didn't
• 28:55
  even
• 28:55
  know
• 28:56
  that
• 28:56
  I
• 28:56
  was
• 28:57
  running
• 28:57
  away
• 28:57
  from
• 28:58
  it.
• 28:58
  But,
• 28:58
  you
• 28:59
  know,
• 28:59
  what
• 28:59
  I
• 28:59
  would
• 28:59
  do
• 28:59
  is
• 28:59
  I
• 28:59
  would
• 29:00
  sit
• 29:00
  down
• 29:00
  and
• 29:00
  I
• 29:00
  would
• 29:01
  try
• 29:01
  some
• 29:01
  tools
• 29:02
  and.
• 29:03
  And
• 29:03
  I
• 29:04
  might
• 29:04
  do
• 29:04
  something
• 29:04
  for
• 29:05
  a
• 29:05
  minute
• 29:05
  or
• 29:05
  two
• 29:05
  and
• 29:06
  be
• 29:06
  like,
• 29:06
  oh,
• 29:07
  I
• 29:07
  think
• 29:07
  the
• 29:07
  dishwasher's
• 29:08
  done.
• 29:09
  Did
• 29:09
  I.
• 29:09
  Did
• 29:10
  I
• 29:10
  put
• 29:10
  the
• 29:10
  clothes
• 29:10
  in
• 29:10
  the.
• 29:11
  In
• 29:11
  the
• 29:11
  dryer?
• 29:12
  So
• 29:12
  then
• 29:12
  you
• 29:13
  ran
• 29:13
  away.
• 29:14
  And
• 29:14
  then
• 29:14
  I
• 29:15
  just
• 29:15
  left.
• 29:15
  But
• 29:15
  I
• 29:16
  didn't
• 29:16
  have
• 29:16
  the
• 29:16
  conscious
• 29:17
  awareness
• 29:18
  that
• 29:18
  I
• 29:18
  was
• 29:19
  keeping
• 29:19
  it.
• 29:19
  But,
• 29:20
  man,
• 29:20
  when
• 29:21
  I
• 29:21
  realized
• 29:21
  that
• 29:22
  I
• 29:22
  was
• 29:22
  doing
• 29:22
  that
• 29:22
  and
• 29:22
  said,
• 29:23
  no,
• 29:23
  we're
• 29:23
  gonna
• 29:24
  stay
• 29:24
  here,
• 29:25
  that's
• 29:25
  when
• 29:25
  it
• 29:26
  got
• 29:26
  really
• 29:26
  hard.
• 29:27
  And
• 29:27
  I
• 29:27
  was
• 29:27
  like,
• 29:28
  wow,
• 29:29
  look
• 29:29
  at
• 29:29
  what
• 29:30
  I
• 29:30
  was
• 29:30
  doing,
• 29:30
  you
• 29:31
  know,
• 29:31
  that
• 29:31
  whole
• 29:31
  time.
• 29:32
  But,
• 29:32
  you
• 29:32
  know,
• 29:32
  it's
• 29:33
  a
• 29:33
  paradox.
• 29:34
  And
• 29:34
  so
• 29:34
  I
• 29:34
  can
• 29:35
  see
• 29:35
  why
• 29:35
  people
• 29:35
  get
• 29:36
  really
• 29:36
  confused
• 29:37
  when
• 29:37
  we
• 29:37
  talk
• 29:37
  about
• 29:38
  this
• 29:38
  issue,
• 29:38
  because
• 29:40
  it
• 29:40
  is.
• 29:40
  It
• 29:41
  feels
• 29:41
  like
• 29:41
  a
• 29:41
  little
• 29:41
  bit
• 29:42
  of
• 29:42
  a.
• 29:42
  A
• 29:42
  maze
• 29:43
  here,
• 29:43
  because
• 29:44
  you
• 29:44
  need.
• 29:45
  What
• 29:45
  do
• 29:45
  you
• 29:45
  need
• 29:46
  to.
• 29:46
  To
• 29:46
  be
• 29:46
  back
• 29:46
  in
• 29:47
  your
• 29:47
  body
• 29:47
  and
• 29:47
  to
• 29:47
  be
• 29:48
  able
• 29:48
  to
• 29:48
  feel
• 29:48
  what's
• 29:49
  going
• 29:49
  on
• 29:49
  in
• 29:49
  your
• 29:49
  body.
• 29:50
  What
• 29:50
  do
• 29:50
  you
• 29:50
  need?
• 29:50
  Safety.
• 29:52
  But
• 29:53
  you.
• 29:54
  You're.
• 29:54
  You're
• 29:54
  looking
• 29:54
  to
• 29:55
  build
• 29:55
  safety.
• 29:55
  You
• 29:55
  have
• 29:55
  no
• 29:55
  safety
• 29:56
  because
• 29:56
  you're
• 29:56
  not
• 29:56
  in
• 29:56
  your
• 29:56
  body,
• 29:57
  but
• 29:57
  you
• 29:57
  need
• 29:57
  safety
• 29:58
  to
• 29:58
  feel
• 29:58
  your
• 29:59
  body.
• 29:59
  So
• 29:59
  you're
• 29:59
  like,
• 30:00
  yeah,
• 30:01
  so
• 30:01
  it.
• 30:01
  It
• 30:01
  makes
• 30:02
  sense
• 30:02
  that
• 30:02
  this
• 30:02
  is
• 30:03
  so
• 30:03
  confusing.
• 30:03
  And
• 30:04
  so
• 30:04
  the
• 30:04
  way
• 30:04
  I
• 30:04
  think
• 30:04
  about
• 30:04
  it
• 30:05
  and
• 30:05
  the,
• 30:05
  in
• 30:05
  the
• 30:05
  analogy
• 30:06
  that
• 30:06
  I
• 30:06
  give
• 30:06
  in
• 30:07
  the
• 30:07
  book,
• 30:07
  because
• 30:07
  this
• 30:07
  is
• 30:07
  a
• 30:08
  challenge
• 30:08
  that
• 30:08
  I,
• 30:08
  that
• 30:09
  I
• 30:09
  name
• 30:09
  because
• 30:10
  it,
• 30:10
  it's
• 30:10
  going
• 30:11
  to
• 30:11
  happen.
• 30:11
  All
• 30:12
  of
• 30:12
  your
• 30:13
  feelings,
• 30:13
  everything
• 30:13
  that's
• 30:14
  been
• 30:14
  trapped
• 30:14
  in
• 30:15
  your
• 30:15
  body
• 30:15
  as
• 30:16
  a
• 30:16
  result
• 30:16
  of
• 30:16
  your
• 30:17
  experiences
• 30:18
  so
• 30:18
  far.
• 30:19
  The
• 30:19
  way
• 30:19
  I
• 30:19
  think
• 30:19
  of
• 30:19
  it
• 30:20
  is
• 30:20
  like
• 30:20
  a
• 30:20
  dark
• 30:20
  alley
• 30:21
  when
• 30:21
  everything
• 30:22
  that
• 30:22
  you
• 30:22
  have
• 30:22
  experienced
• 30:23
  and
• 30:23
  all
• 30:23
  of
• 30:24
  those
• 30:24
  emotions
• 30:25
  are
• 30:25
  in
• 30:25
  your
• 30:25
  body.
• 30:26
  And
• 30:27
  in
• 30:27
  order
• 30:27
  to
• 30:27
  cross
• 30:28
  over
• 30:28
  and
• 30:28
  cross
• 30:29
  through
• 30:29
  that
• 30:29
  dark
• 30:30
  alley
• 30:30
  and
• 30:30
  there
• 30:30
  is
• 30:31
  no
• 30:31
  other
• 30:31
  way
• 30:31
  around
• 30:31
  it,
• 30:31
  right,
• 30:32
  you
• 30:32
  have
• 30:32
  to
• 30:32
  go
• 30:32
  through
• 30:33
  that
• 30:33
  dark
• 30:33
  alley
• 30:34
  if
• 30:34
  you
• 30:34
  want
• 30:34
  to
• 30:35
  get
• 30:35
  to
• 30:35
  safety,
• 30:36
  which
• 30:36
  is
• 30:37
  on
• 30:37
  the
• 30:37
  other
• 30:37
  side
• 30:38
  of
• 30:38
  that
• 30:38
  alley.
• 30:40
  But
• 30:40
  you've
• 30:40
  been
• 30:41
  mugged
• 30:41
  down
• 30:42
  that
• 30:42
  alley,
• 30:42
  you've
• 30:42
  been
• 30:43
  beaten
• 30:43
  down
• 30:43
  that
• 30:44
  alley,
• 30:44
  right?
• 30:44
  You
• 30:44
  have
• 30:44
  no
• 30:45
  desire
• 30:45
  to
• 30:46
  go
• 30:46
  down
• 30:46
  there.
• 30:46
  So
• 30:47
  the
• 30:47
  last
• 30:47
  thing
• 30:47
  we
• 30:47
  want
• 30:48
  to
• 30:48
  do
• 30:48
  is
• 30:48
  push
• 30:49
  ourselves
• 30:49
  down
• 30:49
  there
• 30:50
  and
• 30:50
  say,
• 30:50
  you're
• 30:50
  going
• 30:51
  down
• 30:51
  that
• 30:51
  dark
• 30:52
  alley.
• 30:52
  We
• 30:52
  have
• 30:52
  to
• 30:52
  get
• 30:52
  over.
• 30:53
  If
• 30:53
  we
• 30:53
  want
• 30:53
  safety,
• 30:54
  we
• 30:54
  have
• 30:54
  to
• 30:54
  get
• 30:54
  over
• 30:54
  to
• 30:54
  the
• 30:54
  other
• 30:55
  side,
• 30:55
  right?
• 30:56
  That
• 30:56
  doesn't
• 30:56
  build
• 30:57
  any,
• 30:58
  any
• 30:58
  kind
• 30:58
  of
• 30:58
  safety
• 30:59
  or
• 30:59
  resilience.
• 30:59
  It
• 31:00
  actually
• 31:00
  can
• 31:00
  re.
• 31:00
  Traumatize
• 31:01
  and
• 31:01
  make
• 31:01
  things
• 31:02
  worse.
• 31:03
  So
• 31:03
  this
• 31:03
  time
• 31:04
  before
• 31:04
  we
• 31:05
  go
• 31:05
  down
• 31:05
  the
• 31:05
  alley,
• 31:06
  we're
• 31:06
  going
• 31:06
  to
• 31:06
  resource
• 31:07
  ourselves,
• 31:07
  you
• 31:08
  know,
• 31:08
  and
• 31:09
  that
• 31:09
  looks
• 31:09
  like
• 31:09
  going
• 31:10
  down
• 31:10
  the
• 31:10
  alley.
• 31:10
  But
• 31:10
  this
• 31:10
  time
• 31:11
  we
• 31:11
  have
• 31:11
  a
• 31:11
  375
• 31:12
  pound
• 31:13
  bodyguard
• 31:13
  with
• 31:14
  us
• 31:14
  named
• 31:14
  Thor.
• 31:15
  We
• 31:15
  have
• 31:15
  a
• 31:15
  lantern,
• 31:16
  we
• 31:17
  have
• 31:17
  pepper
• 31:17
  spray.
• 31:18
  We
• 31:18
  have,
• 31:18
  you
• 31:19
  know,
• 31:19
  everything
• 31:19
  we
• 31:20
  need.
• 31:20
  We
• 31:20
  have
• 31:20
  a
• 31:20
  wise
• 31:20
  guide
• 31:21
  that
• 31:21
  can
• 31:21
  tell
• 31:21
  us,
• 31:22
  you
• 31:22
  know,
• 31:22
  how,
• 31:22
  how
• 31:22
  to
• 31:23
  navigate.
• 31:24
  So
• 31:24
  now
• 31:24
  when
• 31:24
  we
• 31:25
  go
• 31:25
  down,
• 31:26
  it
• 31:26
  does,
• 31:26
  it
• 31:26
  feels,
• 31:27
  it's
• 31:27
  still
• 31:27
  a
• 31:27
  little,
• 31:28
  you
• 31:28
  know,
• 31:28
  little
• 31:29
  bit
• 31:29
  scary.
• 31:29
  But
• 31:30
  because
• 31:30
  we
• 31:30
  have
• 31:30
  resourcing,
• 31:32
  we
• 31:32
  can
• 31:32
  do
• 31:33
  it.
• 31:33
  We
• 31:33
  have
• 31:33
  enough
• 31:34
  safety
• 31:36
  to
• 31:36
  go
• 31:37
  and,
• 31:37
  and,
• 31:37
  and
• 31:38
  to
• 31:38
  explore
• 31:39
  what's
• 31:39
  in
• 31:39
  the
• 31:39
  body.
• 31:40
  But
• 31:41
  so
• 31:41
  we
• 31:41
  have
• 31:41
  to
• 31:41
  build
• 31:41
  that
• 31:42
  first.
• 31:43
  And
• 31:44
  again,
• 31:44
  that's
• 31:44
  something
• 31:45
  that,
• 31:45
  you
• 31:45
  know,
• 31:45
  might
• 31:46
  take
• 31:46
  a
• 31:46
  little
• 31:46
  bit
• 31:46
  of
• 31:47
  time.
• 31:47
  We
• 31:47
  might
• 31:47
  need
• 31:47
  to
• 31:47
  start
• 31:48
  depending
• 31:48
  on
• 31:48
  the
• 31:48
  individual
• 31:49
  system,
• 31:49
  we
• 31:49
  might
• 31:49
  need
• 31:50
  to
• 31:50
  start,
• 31:50
  start
• 31:50
  by
• 31:51
  just
• 31:51
  noticing
• 31:52
  nice
• 31:52
  things
• 31:53
  or
• 31:53
  noticing
• 31:54
  the,
• 31:54
  the,
• 31:54
  your
• 31:55
  big
• 31:55
  toe
• 31:55
  for
• 31:56
  a
• 31:56
  bit,
• 31:56
  right.
• 31:56
  And
• 31:57
  start
• 31:57
  to
• 31:57
  get
• 31:57
  familiar
• 31:58
  with
• 31:58
  and
• 31:59
  open
• 31:59
  to
• 31:59
  the
• 31:59
  idea
• 32:00
  of
• 32:00
  exploring
• 32:01
  the
• 32:01
  body
• 32:01
  in
• 32:02
  that
• 32:02
  way
• 32:02
  before
• 32:03
  we
• 32:03
  go
• 32:03
  into
• 32:05
  any
• 32:05
  of
• 32:05
  the
• 32:05
  other,
• 32:06
  you
• 32:06
  know,
• 32:06
  more
• 32:07
  challenging,
• 32:08
  intense
• 32:09
  feelings.
• 32:10
  So
• 32:10
  there's
• 32:10
  all
• 32:10
  these
• 32:10
  ways
• 32:11
  that
• 32:11
  we
• 32:11
  resource
• 32:12
  ourselves
• 32:12
  both
• 32:13
  externally
• 32:14
  and
• 32:14
  internally
• 32:15
  so
• 32:15
  that
• 32:15
  we
• 32:16
  can.
• 32:16
  But
• 32:16
  we
• 32:17
  do
• 32:17
  it
• 32:17
  with
• 32:17
  intention
• 32:18
  and
• 32:19
  we
• 32:19
  know
• 32:19
  our
• 32:19
  window
• 32:20
  of
• 32:20
  tolerance.
• 32:20
  So
• 32:21
  we're
• 32:21
  not
• 32:21
  stepping
• 32:22
  past
• 32:22
  that
• 32:23
  on
• 32:23
  a
• 32:23
  regular
• 32:24
  basis.
• 32:24
  We
• 32:24
  know
• 32:25
  how
• 32:25
  to
• 32:26
  come
• 32:27
  back
• 32:27
  to
• 32:27
  regulation
• 32:28
  and
• 32:28
  say,
• 32:28
  okay,
• 32:29
  another
• 32:29
  day.
• 32:30
  Right.
• 32:30
  And
• 32:31
  the
• 32:32
  approach
• 32:32
  is
• 32:32
  what
• 32:33
  allows
• 32:33
  us
• 32:34
  to
• 32:34
  become
• 32:34
  embodied
• 32:35
  without
• 32:35
  overwhelming
• 32:36
  us
• 32:36
  so
• 32:36
  much
• 32:37
  that
• 32:37
  we
• 32:37
  shut
• 32:38
  it
• 32:38
  down.
• 32:38
  And
• 32:38
  I'm
• 32:38
  sure
• 32:38
  you've
• 32:39
  seen
• 32:39
  so
• 32:39
  many
• 32:39
  times
• 32:40
  people
• 32:41
  have
• 32:41
  tried
• 32:41
  bravely
• 32:42
  to
• 32:42
  overcome,
• 32:43
  you
• 32:43
  know,
• 32:44
  their
• 32:44
  trauma
• 32:44
  and
• 32:44
  to,
• 32:45
  to
• 32:45
  get
• 32:45
  inside
• 32:46
  the
• 32:46
  body,
• 32:46
  etc,
• 32:47
  and
• 32:48
  they've
• 32:48
  done
• 32:48
  it
• 32:49
  in
• 32:49
  ways
• 32:49
  that,
• 32:49
  where
• 32:49
  they
• 32:50
  didn't
• 32:50
  have
• 32:50
  the
• 32:50
  resourcing
• 32:51
  and
• 32:51
  then,
• 32:51
  you
• 32:52
  know,
• 32:52
  then
• 32:52
  it
• 32:52
  gets
• 32:53
  longer.
• 32:53
  It's
• 32:53
  like,
• 32:53
  okay,
• 32:53
  I'm
• 32:54
  not
• 32:54
  trying
• 32:54
  that
• 32:54
  again.
• 32:54
  And
• 32:55
  it
• 32:55
  becomes
• 32:55
  exactly
• 32:56
  five
• 32:56
  years,
• 32:57
  you
• 32:57
  know,
• 32:57
  now
• 32:57
  it's
• 32:58
  been
• 32:58
  10
• 32:58
  years
• 32:58
  since
• 32:59
  I
• 32:59
  tried.
• 32:59
  Because
• 33:00
  it,
• 33:01
  it,
• 33:01
  we
• 33:01
  can
• 33:01
  really
• 33:01
  set
• 33:02
  ourselves
• 33:02
  back.
• 33:03
  Yep,
• 33:03
  absolutely.
• 33:04
  And
• 33:04
  that's
• 33:05
  why.
• 33:05
  Yeah.
• 33:05
  I
• 33:05
  caution
• 33:05
  people,
• 33:07
  it's
• 33:07
  baby
• 33:07
  steps.
• 33:08
  Everything
• 33:08
  in
• 33:08
  healing
• 33:09
  is
• 33:09
  baby
• 33:09
  steps.
• 33:10
  Because
• 33:10
  just
• 33:10
  like
• 33:10
  you,
• 33:11
  I
• 33:11
  mean
• 33:11
  the
• 33:11
  things
• 33:11
  that
• 33:12
  happened
• 33:12
  to
• 33:12
  you
• 33:12
  when
• 33:12
  you
• 33:12
  were
• 33:13
  a
• 33:13
  child,
• 33:14
  even
• 33:14
  the
• 33:14
  little
• 33:14
  things,
• 33:15
  everything
• 33:16
  seemed
• 33:16
  big.
• 33:17
  And
• 33:17
  when
• 33:18
  you're
• 33:18
  dealing
• 33:18
  with
• 33:18
  trauma
• 33:19
  and
• 33:19
  when
• 33:19
  you're
• 33:19
  dealing
• 33:19
  with
• 33:20
  reaction,
• 33:21
  you're
• 33:21
  back
• 33:22
  in
• 33:22
  that
• 33:22
  childlike
• 33:24
  moment.
• 33:25
  So
• 33:25
  everything
• 33:26
  seems,
• 33:26
  I
• 33:26
  mean,
• 33:27
  things
• 33:27
  that
• 33:27
  like
• 33:27
  people
• 33:28
  flip
• 33:28
  out
• 33:28
  on
• 33:28
  and
• 33:29
  they're
• 33:29
  like,
• 33:29
  oh
• 33:29
  my
• 33:29
  God
• 33:30
  now
• 33:30
  looking
• 33:30
  at
• 33:30
  that,
• 33:30
  that
• 33:31
  was
• 33:31
  so
• 33:31
  dumb.
• 33:31
  And
• 33:32
  I'm
• 33:32
  like,
• 33:32
  but
• 33:32
  you
• 33:33
  were
• 33:33
  back
• 33:33
  there
• 33:34
  when
• 33:34
  it,
• 33:34
  when
• 33:35
  you
• 33:35
  had
• 33:35
  that
• 33:36
  reactions.
• 33:37
  So
• 33:37
  it
• 33:37
  was
• 33:37
  still
• 33:38
  really
• 33:38
  big.
• 33:39
  So
• 33:39
  yes,
• 33:39
  the
• 33:39
  outsider
• 33:40
  might
• 33:40
  have
• 33:40
  been
• 33:40
  like,
• 33:40
  what
• 33:40
  was
• 33:41
  that
• 33:41
  about?
• 33:42
  But
• 33:42
  it
• 33:42
  was
• 33:42
  big
• 33:42
  to
• 33:43
  you
• 33:43
  and
• 33:43
  kind
• 33:43
  of
• 33:43
  like
• 33:44
  you
• 33:44
  started.
• 33:44
  And
• 33:44
  we're
• 33:44
  going
• 33:44
  to
• 33:45
  circle
• 33:45
  right
• 33:45
  back
• 33:45
  to
• 33:46
  the
• 33:46
  beginning
• 33:47
  when
• 33:48
  you
• 33:48
  said
• 33:48
  it
• 33:48
  doesn't
• 33:49
  matter.
• 33:49
  Big
• 33:49
  T,
• 33:50
  little
• 33:50
  T,
• 33:50
  middle
• 33:51
  T.
• 33:51
  All
• 33:51
  that
• 33:51
  trauma,
• 33:52
  if
• 33:52
  it
• 33:52
  changed
• 33:53
  the
• 33:53
  way
• 33:53
  you
• 33:53
  looked
• 33:53
  at
• 33:54
  the
• 33:54
  world
• 33:54
  and
• 33:54
  it
• 33:55
  changed
• 33:55
  the
• 33:55
  way
• 33:55
  you
• 33:55
  looked
• 33:56
  at
• 33:56
  yourself.
• 33:57
  Yeah.
• 33:58
  It
• 33:58
  will
• 33:58
  be
• 33:58
  with
• 33:59
  you
• 33:59
  until
• 33:59
  you
• 34:00
  process
• 34:00
  it
• 34:01
  and,
• 34:01
  and,
• 34:02
  and
• 34:02
  deal,
• 34:02
  you
• 34:03
  know,
• 34:03
  with
• 34:03
  it
• 34:03
  and
• 34:04
  make
• 34:04
  peace
• 34:04
  with
• 34:05
  it.
• 34:05
  But
• 34:06
  you
• 34:06
  know,
• 34:07
  those.
• 34:08
  I,
• 34:09
  that's
• 34:09
  why
• 34:09
  you
• 34:09
  never
• 34:09
  compare.
• 34:10
  You
• 34:10
  never
• 34:10
  compare.
• 34:11
  Like,
• 34:11
  oh,
• 34:11
  well,
• 34:11
  I
• 34:11
  didn't
• 34:12
  have
• 34:12
  it
• 34:12
  as
• 34:12
  bad
• 34:12
  as
• 34:12
  this
• 34:13
  person.
• 34:13
  Right.
• 34:14
  Yeah.
• 34:14
  It
• 34:14
  doesn't
• 34:15
  matter
• 34:15
  if
• 34:15
  it
• 34:15
  changed
• 34:16
  the
• 34:16
  way
• 34:16
  you
• 34:17
  look
• 34:17
  at
• 34:17
  yourself
• 34:17
  in
• 34:18
  the
• 34:18
  world,
• 34:20
  you
• 34:20
  deserve
• 34:21
  to
• 34:21
  process
• 34:21
  it.
• 34:22
  Yeah,
• 34:24
  it's
• 34:24
  important.
• 34:25
  Yeah.
• 34:26
  So
• 34:26
  this
• 34:26
  was
• 34:26
  super
• 34:27
  fun.
• 34:27
  But
• 34:28
  tell
• 34:28
  people
• 34:28
  how
• 34:29
  I,
• 34:29
  I
• 34:29
  know
• 34:29
  I
• 34:30
  could.
• 34:30
  We
• 34:30
  could
• 34:30
  go
• 34:30
  on
• 34:30
  forever.
• 34:31
  I
• 34:31
  would
• 34:32
  love
• 34:32
  to,
• 34:32
  but
• 34:32
  tell
• 34:33
  people
• 34:33
  how
• 34:33
  they
• 34:33
  work
• 34:34
  with
• 34:34
  you
• 34:34
  and
• 34:34
  what
• 34:34
  you
• 34:34
  do
• 34:35
  and
• 34:35
  how
• 34:35
  they
• 34:35
  can
• 34:35
  get
• 34:36
  hold
• 34:36
  of
• 34:36
  you
• 34:36
  and
• 34:36
  reach
• 34:36
  you.
• 34:37
  Yeah.
• 34:38
  So
• 34:38
  the
• 34:38
  best
• 34:38
  place
• 34:39
  is
• 34:39
  probably
• 34:40
  the
• 34:40
  website.
• 34:41
  It's
• 34:41
  lorimontre.com
• 34:43
  L
• 34:43
  O
• 34:43
  R-I
• 34:44
  M
• 34:44
  O-N-T-R-Y.com
• 34:47
  and
• 34:47
  you
• 34:47
  can
• 34:48
  also
• 34:48
  find
• 34:48
  me
• 34:48
  on,
• 34:49
  on
• 34:49
  YouTube
• 34:49
  and
• 34:50
  on
• 34:50
  all
• 34:50
  the
• 34:51
  social
• 34:51
  media
• 34:51
  platforms.
• 34:52
  Lori
• 34:52
  Montreal
• 34:53
  and
• 34:54
  you
• 34:54
  know
• 34:54
  what
• 34:54
  I'd
• 34:54
  love
• 34:55
  to,
• 34:55
  to
• 34:55
  offer
• 34:55
  your
• 34:56
  readers
• 34:56
  is,
• 34:56
  is
• 34:57
  a,
• 34:57
  a
• 34:57
  little
• 34:57
  bit
• 34:58
  more
• 34:58
  of
• 34:58
  an
• 34:58
  understanding
• 34:59
  of
• 34:59
  the
• 34:59
  framework
• 35:00
  that
• 35:00
  we
• 35:00
  talked
• 35:01
  about
• 35:01
  and
• 35:02
  that
• 35:03
  can
• 35:03
  be
• 35:03
  found
• 35:03
  in
• 35:04
  the
• 35:04
  Introduction
• 35:04
  to
• 35:05
  the
• 35:05
  book
• 35:05
  you're
• 35:05
  not
• 35:06
  the
• 35:06
  problem
• 35:06
  book
• 35:07
  coming
• 35:08
  out
• 35:08
  next
• 35:08
  month,
• 35:08
  April
• 35:09
  25th.
• 35:10
  So
• 35:11
  it's
• 35:11
  an
• 35:11
  exciting
• 35:11
  time.
• 35:12
  Looking
• 35:12
  forward
• 35:12
  to
• 35:12
  sharing
• 35:13
  that
• 35:13
  out
• 35:13
  in
• 35:14
  the
• 35:14
  world.
• 35:15
  And
• 35:15
  so
• 35:16
  the
• 35:16
  you're
• 35:16
  not
• 35:16
  the
• 35:16
  problem
• 35:17
  movement
• 35:17
  is.
• 35:18
  Is
• 35:18
  something
• 35:18
  that
• 35:19
  is
• 35:19
  very
• 35:20
  dear
• 35:20
  and
• 35:20
  important
• 35:21
  to
• 35:21
  me
• 35:21
  where
• 35:22
  we
• 35:22
  just,
• 35:23
  you
• 35:23
  know,
• 35:23
  reach
• 35:23
  as
• 35:24
  many
• 35:24
  people
• 35:24
  as
• 35:25
  we
• 35:25
  can
• 35:25
  to
• 35:25
  help
• 35:26
  them
• 35:26
  understand
• 35:26
  that
• 35:27
  truly
• 35:27
  they're
• 35:27
  not
• 35:27
  the
• 35:28
  problem.
• 35:28
  It's
• 35:28
  the
• 35:28
  adaptations.
• 35:29
  And
• 35:29
  we
• 35:30
  can
• 35:30
  adapt
• 35:30
  again.
• 35:31
  So
• 35:31
  there's
• 35:31
  a
• 35:32
  designated
• 35:32
  Facebook
• 35:33
  group
• 35:33
  called
• 35:34
  you're
• 35:34
  not
• 35:34
  the
• 35:34
  problem.
• 35:35
  And
• 35:35
  I
• 35:36
  would
• 35:36
  love
• 35:36
  to
• 35:37
  have
• 35:37
  anyone
• 35:38
  and
• 35:38
  everyone
• 35:39
  in
• 35:39
  that
• 35:40
  group
• 35:41
  to.
• 35:41
  To
• 35:41
  just
• 35:42
  to
• 35:42
  build
• 35:42
  that
• 35:42
  community.
• 35:43
  Is
• 35:43
  that
• 35:44
  your
• 35:44
  group?
• 35:44
  That's
• 35:44
  your
• 35:44
  community?
• 35:45
  Yes.
• 35:46
  Nice.
• 35:47
  Love
• 35:47
  to
• 35:47
  have
• 35:48
  Tammy.
• 35:48
  I'd
• 35:48
  love
• 35:49
  to
• 35:49
  have
• 35:49
  you
• 35:49
  in
• 35:49
  there
• 35:49
  as
• 35:50
  a
• 35:50
  beautiful
• 35:50
  resource.
• 35:51
  Just,
• 35:51
  you
• 35:52
  know,
• 35:52
  sometime
• 35:52
  you
• 35:53
  plop
• 35:53
  a
• 35:54
  post
• 35:54
  in
• 35:54
  there
• 35:54
  to
• 35:55
  remind
• 35:55
  us
• 35:55
  it's
• 35:55
  just
• 35:56
  where
• 35:56
  the
• 35:56
  conversations
• 35:57
  can
• 35:57
  happen
• 35:58
  around.
• 35:59
  Yeah,
• 36:00
  absolutely.
• 36:01
  I
• 36:01
  will
• 36:01
  be
• 36:01
  honored,
• 36:02
  actually.
• 36:03
  So
• 36:03
  thank
• 36:03
  you.
• 36:04
  And
• 36:05
  before
• 36:05
  you
• 36:05
  go,
• 36:05
  I
• 36:06
  want
• 36:06
  you
• 36:06
  to
• 36:06
  leave
• 36:07
  the
• 36:07
  listeners
• 36:08
  with
• 36:08
  one
• 36:08
  final
• 36:09
  piece
• 36:09
  of
• 36:09
  advice
• 36:10
  or
• 36:10
  words
• 36:10
  of
• 36:10
  wisdom,
• 36:11
  something
• 36:12
  to
• 36:12
  take
• 36:12
  with
• 36:12
  them
• 36:12
  to
• 36:12
  make
• 36:13
  their
• 36:13
  day
• 36:13
  a
• 36:13
  little
• 36:13
  brighter.
• 36:15
  Yeah.
• 36:16
  Gosh.
• 36:16
  So
• 36:16
  many.
• 36:17
  So
• 36:17
  many
• 36:17
  things
• 36:17
  and
• 36:17
  so
• 36:18
  many
• 36:18
  things
• 36:18
  that
• 36:18
  we.
• 36:18
  We
• 36:19
  touched
• 36:19
  on.
• 36:20
  And
• 36:20
  I
• 36:20
  think
• 36:20
  that
• 36:21
  when
• 36:22
  I
• 36:22
  answer
• 36:22
  a
• 36:22
  question
• 36:23
  like
• 36:23
  this,
• 36:23
  I
• 36:23
  think
• 36:23
  it
• 36:24
  really
• 36:24
  comes
• 36:24
  back
• 36:24
  to
• 36:25
  what
• 36:25
  we.
• 36:26
  What
• 36:26
  we
• 36:26
  discovered
• 36:27
  together
• 36:27
  here
• 36:27
  and
• 36:28
  talked
• 36:28
  about
• 36:28
  inner
• 36:29
  resourcing
• 36:30
  and
• 36:30
  being
• 36:31
  your
• 36:31
  own
• 36:32
  resource
• 36:33
  and.
• 36:33
  And
• 36:34
  taking
• 36:34
  care
• 36:34
  of
• 36:35
  yourself.
• 36:35
  And
• 36:35
  I
• 36:35
  think
• 36:36
  that,
• 36:36
  you
• 36:36
  know,
• 36:37
  starting
• 36:37
  with
• 36:37
  something
• 36:38
  as
• 36:38
  simple
• 36:38
  as
• 36:39
  two
• 36:39
  to
• 36:39
  three
• 36:39
  minutes
• 36:40
  in
• 36:40
  the
• 36:40
  morning
• 36:40
  when
• 36:41
  you
• 36:41
  wake
• 36:41
  up,
• 36:41
  giving
• 36:41
  to
• 36:42
  yourself,
• 36:42
  you
• 36:42
  know,
• 36:43
  doing
• 36:43
  that
• 36:43
  practice
• 36:43
  that
• 36:43
  we
• 36:44
  talked
• 36:44
  about,
• 36:44
  maybe
• 36:45
  putting
• 36:45
  hand
• 36:45
  on
• 36:46
  your
• 36:46
  part.
• 36:46
  Hey,
• 36:46
  body.
• 36:47
  What
• 36:48
  do
• 36:48
  you
• 36:48
  need
• 36:48
  today?
• 36:49
  Oh,
• 36:49
  you
• 36:50
  want
• 36:50
  to
• 36:50
  sway.
• 36:51
  Fantastic.
• 36:51
  Let's
• 36:52
  sway
• 36:52
  for
• 36:52
  a
• 36:53
  moment.
• 36:53
  Oh,
• 36:54
  you
• 36:54
  want
• 36:54
  to.
• 36:54
  You
• 36:54
  want
• 36:54
  to
• 36:55
  do
• 36:55
  a
• 36:56
  big
• 36:56
  old
• 36:56
  growl
• 36:57
  or.
• 36:58
  Or
• 36:58
  you
• 36:58
  want
• 36:58
  to
• 36:59
  shake
• 36:59
  your
• 36:59
  hand,
• 36:59
  whatever
• 37:00
  it
• 37:00
  is.
• 37:00
  Right.
• 37:00
  And
• 37:00
  I
• 37:00
  love
• 37:01
  that
• 37:01
  you're
• 37:01
  giving,
• 37:01
  you
• 37:01
  know,
• 37:02
  various
• 37:02
  tools,
• 37:03
  and
• 37:03
  I.
• 37:03
  I
• 37:03
  give
• 37:03
  a
• 37:03
  lot,
• 37:04
  too,
• 37:04
  because
• 37:04
  you
• 37:04
  want
• 37:05
  to
• 37:05
  have
• 37:05
  something
• 37:05
  that
• 37:05
  you
• 37:06
  can
• 37:06
  just
• 37:06
  pull
• 37:06
  out,
• 37:07
  but,
• 37:07
  you
• 37:07
  know,
• 37:07
  just
• 37:08
  taking
• 37:08
  those
• 37:08
  few
• 37:08
  minutes
• 37:09
  where
• 37:09
  you
• 37:10
  consistently
• 37:11
  show
• 37:11
  up.
• 37:11
  Nervous
• 37:11
  systems
• 37:12
  love
• 37:13
  consistency
• 37:13
  and
• 37:14
  reliability.
• 37:14
  Right.
• 37:15
  So
• 37:15
  by.
• 37:15
  By
• 37:16
  showing
• 37:16
  up
• 37:16
  every
• 37:17
  day
• 37:17
  for
• 37:17
  two
• 37:18
  or
• 37:18
  three
• 37:18
  minutes,
• 37:19
  things
• 37:19
  can
• 37:19
  grow
• 37:20
  from
• 37:20
  there.
• 37:20
  I
• 37:20
  think
• 37:20
  it's
• 37:21
  a
• 37:21
  really
• 37:21
  lovely
• 37:22
  seed
• 37:22
  and
• 37:22
  a
• 37:23
  great
• 37:23
  place
• 37:23
  to
• 37:23
  start.
• 37:25
  Perfect.
• 37:25
  I
• 37:26
  absolutely
• 37:26
  love
• 37:26
  that.
• 37:26
  And
• 37:27
  it
• 37:27
  does
• 37:27
  make
• 37:28
  such
• 37:28
  a
• 37:28
  big
• 37:28
  difference.
• 37:29
  And
• 37:30
  your
• 37:30
  body
• 37:30
  talks
• 37:31
  to
• 37:31
  you
• 37:32
  every
• 37:32
  moment,
• 37:33
  every
• 37:33
  reaction,
• 37:34
  every.
• 37:34
  It's
• 37:35
  just
• 37:35
  talking
• 37:35
  to
• 37:36
  you
• 37:36
  all
• 37:36
  day
• 37:36
  long.
• 37:36
  And
• 37:37
  I
• 37:37
  keep
• 37:37
  saying,
• 37:37
  especially
• 37:38
  going
• 37:38
  back
• 37:38
  to
• 37:38
  the
• 37:38
  patterns,
• 37:39
  listen
• 37:40
  to
• 37:40
  your
• 37:40
  body
• 37:40
  talking
• 37:41
  before
• 37:41
  you
• 37:41
  have
• 37:42
  to
• 37:42
  listen
• 37:42
  to
• 37:42
  it
• 37:42
  scream.
• 37:44
  Yes,
• 37:45
  I
• 37:45
  know.
• 37:46
  It's
• 37:46
  really
• 37:47
  true.
• 37:48
  It
• 37:48
  is
• 37:48
  because
• 37:48
  it's
• 37:49
  talking
• 37:49
  to
• 37:49
  you.
• 37:49
  And
• 37:50
  if
• 37:50
  you
• 37:50
  don't
• 37:50
  listen,
• 37:51
  eventually
• 37:51
  you
• 37:51
  will
• 37:51
  have
• 37:52
  to
• 37:52
  listen
• 37:52
  to
• 37:52
  it
• 37:52
  scream.
• 37:53
  And
• 37:53
  we
• 37:53
  don't
• 37:53
  want
• 37:54
  that
• 37:54
  for
• 37:54
  you.
• 37:55
  So,
• 37:55
  again,
• 37:56
  thank
• 37:56
  you
• 37:56
  so
• 37:56
  much.
• 37:57
  Honored
• 37:57
  that
• 37:57
  you
• 37:58
  came
• 37:58
  on
• 37:58
  and
• 37:58
  talked
• 37:58
  to
• 37:58
  us.
• 37:59
  Love
• 37:59
  it
• 37:59
  having
• 37:59
  you
• 38:00
  here.
• 38:00
  And
• 38:00
  for
• 38:00
  everybody
• 38:01
  else
• 38:01
  out
• 38:01
  there
• 38:01
  listening,
• 38:02
  you
• 38:02
  heard
• 38:02
  it.
• 38:03
  I
• 38:03
  mean,
• 38:03
  you
• 38:03
  know,
• 38:03
  you
• 38:04
  are
• 38:04
  just
• 38:04
  perfect,
• 38:05
  absolutely
• 38:05
  perfect,
• 38:05
  just
• 38:06
  the
• 38:06
  way
• 38:06
  you
• 38:06
  are
• 38:06
  here,
• 38:07
  right
• 38:07
  here,
• 38:07
  right
• 38:08
  now.
• 38:08
  And
• 38:09
  you
• 38:09
  are
• 38:09
  way
• 38:10
  more
• 38:10
  than
• 38:10
  enough.
• 38:11
  So
• 38:11
  just
• 38:11
  know
• 38:12
  that
• 38:12
  you
• 38:12
  deserve
• 38:12
  it.
• 38:14
  She
• 38:14
  talked
• 38:14
  about
• 38:15
  sitting
• 38:15
  beside,
• 38:15
  you
• 38:16
  know,
• 38:16
  that
• 38:17
  one
• 38:17
  person
• 38:17
  that
• 38:18
  always
• 38:18
  has
• 38:18
  your
• 38:18
  back.
• 38:19
  Treat
• 38:20
  yourself
• 38:20
  like
• 38:20
  your
• 38:21
  own
• 38:21
  best
• 38:22
  friend.
• 38:24
  Well,
• 38:24
  thank
• 38:24
  you
• 38:24
  all.
• 38:25
  And
• 38:25
  we.
• 38:25
  Yes,
• 38:26
  we
• 38:26
  will
• 38:26
  see
• 38:26
  you
• 38:27
  back
• 38:27
  next
• 38:27
  week.
• 38:28
  Thank
• 38:28
  you.