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136: 5 Strategies to Silencing the Inner Critic · Harder Than Life

• 0:07
  I'm Kelly Siegel, and this is Harder Than Life, a podcast about self-love, self-awareness, business, and health. We tell outrageous stories and boil everything down to simple, practical advice you can start using today. Let's get living. What up, HTL Nation? It's Kelly Siegel back with another no BS episode of Harder Than Life. Today we're going after an enemy that's been living rent-free in your head for way too darn long. Your inner critic.
• 0:37
  You know that voice, the one that whispers, you're not enough. You don't have what it takes. Who the hell do you think you are? Does that sound familiar? Well, I'm here to tell you, that voice, it's a liar.
• 0:53
  And today, we're shutting it down. Understanding the inner critic, the inner bitch voice, your inner critic, that's just your inner bitch voice. And its only job is to keep you small. It was built from all the times someone told you you couldn't. All the times you failed and let it define you. And all the fear that has been shoved down your throat since childhood. I'll keep it real. I fought that voice my whole life.
• 1:23
  Growing up, I was the short kid. They called me Smurf in school. And yeah, it sucked. I was smaller. I was younger than everyone. And it didn't take long before that voice in my head started to tell me I'd never be enough. So what did I do? I hustled harder than anyone. I made sure that when people talked about me, they weren't talking about my size.
• 1:49
  They were talking about how unstoppable I was. Let me tell you something. That voice still creeps in. You ever notice I wear Alexander McQueen shoes? Guess what? They had an extra inch or two. Coincidence? Maybe. But when it's time to show up confident, I'm grabbing those darn shoes. But here's the truth. The inner critic isn't trying to ruin you.
• 2:13
  It thinks it's protecting you. It's like an overprotective parent who doesn't know when to shut the hell up. But today we're flipping the script. The damage it does, that voice is a thief, that inner voice, it's stealing from you. It's stealing opportunities, relationships, and confidence. Ever get stuck overthinking something so much you miss the opportunity entirely? That's paralysis through analysis. And your inner critic loves keeping you stuck.
• 2:43
  I've seen it firsthand. Not long ago, a client at NTM told me they were canceling their contract. Their financial backer decided we were too expensive. Walked into that meeting knowing damn well this guy wasn't changing his mind. But instead of spiraling, I flipped that script. Instead of assuming the worst, I assumed positive intent. The next meeting, we worked things out like grown men and walked away on good terms.
• 3:12
  Then there's the time I almost didn't launch harder than life. I was posting shirtless Instagram videos in the pandemic, trying to inspire people, and I heard it all. Who do you think you are, Tony Robbins? That voice told me I look stupid.
• 3:30
  that I should stop. But guess what? I did it anyway. And now we're crushing it. The podcast is climbing the charts. The coaching program is booming, working on book number two. The voice tried to kill my dreams. And if I had listened, none of this would be happening. I want you to take back control. Here's some strategies to silence the inner critic.
• 3:56
  How do you shut that voice up? There's five steps that work. Number one, name it and call it out. Never said this out loud before, but here goes. Growing up, we were at welfare. My mom gave me my sister's father's last name so we could stay on government assistant that name.
• 4:20
  That's what I call my inner critic. It reminds me of the version of me that no longer exists. But what I need to call on my inner badass, the one that gets it done, never gives up, who always finds a way, is when I channel Siegel. The name is who I really am. That was hard for me to say, guys, I'm choked up. So when you see me on my license plate, it says Siegel, I'm proud of it.
• 4:50
  I use that over and over multiple times a day. If I told you the other last name, it's not kind. It's that helpless little boy who had no voice, couldn't stand up for himself. And that's not who I am. Number two, flip the script. The next time your inner critic says you're going to fail, answer with this. I've overcome everything that life has thrown at me. Why the hell would I stop now?
• 5:17
  You are batting 100%, 1,000 against adversity. You've survived every damn challenge. Don't stop now. Number three, just freaking do it. Nike got it right. Just do it. Stop analyzing. Stop overthinking. Take action. I used to say, face your fears, live your dreams. Keep that one. Write it down. Live by it. Number four.
• 5:45
  Get an accountability partner. Every morning at 5 a.m., I'm in the gym with my boy Derek. Do I want to be there? Hell no. But I show up because I know he's counting on me. When I'm tired, weak, or feeling like I can't push through, he spots me just enough to get me to that next level. That's what an accountability partner does. You need one. Find one. And remember, your friends are.
• 6:12
  tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. Number five, stop playing small. Playing small is canceled. You are limitless. You are unstoppable. And you deserve better than listening to a voice that's full of shit. The inner critic is powerless, unless you give it power. For years, I thought I was unlovable. I've
• 6:38
  My inner critic told me I'd never quit drinking, that I'd never change. Six years later, guess what? I won. I have the most amazing real ride or die friends. I have a partner who matches my energy. I run a thriving IT cybersecurity business. I have a top-rated podcast. If I'd listened to my inner critic, none of this would have happened. So here's your challenge.
• 7:06
  Name your inner critic. Use one of these strategies this week. Feel free to DM me or hit me up in the comments. Tell me how it went. You are not your inner critic. You are stronger than it. This is Kelly Siegel. And you've been listening to Harder Than Life. Remember, growth starts where self-doubt ends. If this resonates with you, please like, please share, please comment. It helps with the algorithm.
• 7:33
  Until next time, be harder than life. Please rate and share this podcast. I'm active on all social platforms and love to hear from my Segal supporters. Each and every episode is sponsored by my company, National Technology Management, the easiest and best IT company to do business with, delivering peace of mind with technology every day, even simplifying cybersecurity. Visit TrustNTM.com for more info. Until next week, be harder than life.