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140: Why 'Working Harder' Is Wrecking Your Health (And What to Do Instead) · Harder Than Life

• 0:07
  I'm Kelly Siegel, and this is Harder Than Life, a podcast about self-love, self-awareness, business, and health. We tell outrageous stories and boil everything down to simple, practical advice you can start using today. Let's get living.
• 0:23
  Hey everyone, Kelly Siegel here and welcome back to Harder Than Life. Today we're talking about something that hits close to home for so many of us. The dangerous toll a lack of work-life balance can take on your health and how to turn it around before it's too late. This topic matters because we live in a culture that glorifies the grind. Long hours, no sleep, constant hustle, but at what cost?
• 0:48
  I've been there and let me tell you, ignoring balance comes with a heavy price. Your body, your mind, your relationships. By the end of this episode, you'll not only understand why work-life balance matters, but you'll also have actionable steps to regain control of your time and health. So let's jump in. The cost of this imbalance, your physical health risks. Chronic stress leads to high blood pressure, heart disease,
• 1:14
  weakened immunity, and even weight gain. Studies show that people working 55 plus hours a week have a 33% higher risk of stroke compared to those working 35 to 40 hours a week. Let me say that again. Studies show that people working 55 hours a week are 33% higher risk of stroke compared to those people working 40 hours.
• 1:39
  Not all work hours are created equal though. I can work 10 hours on something that fires me up and it feels like two hours on something energy draining. And for me, these are repeat issues and it feels like 10 hours.
• 1:53
  Let me say that again. I cannot stand it. It's so draining to me to work on the same thing over and over again. I hate reoccurring issues. Let's solve it. Let's move on. That's what drains me. There are many mental health risks, burnout, anxiety, depression, and difficulty focusing. These are the common results of imbalance. You might think you're being productive, but constant stress actually kills creativity and problem solving.
• 2:23
  I worked all day yesterday. My eyes got so blurry, I didn't know what I was seeing. So I finally shut it down. When I started my first company called Kelly Communications, I was proud and talked to everyone about it. I never shut up. Everyone was a prospect.
• 2:39
  I later learned that all my family and friends hated it. Didn't want to talk business all the time. They especially didn't want to hear about how great I thought I was and all of the money I was making. This led to drinking more, which led to sleepless nights, which led to even more drinking, which snowballed into irritability, frustration, and bad business decisions on top of the poor life choices I was already making.
• 3:07
  I was headed for disaster. Lucky for me, or perhaps unlucky, it's just prior to that disaster, I always found a vacation to reset until nothing seemed to work. Then it all had to be torn down. Wise people learn from other people's mistakes, learn from my mistake.
• 3:26
  I thought I would work like crazy. When I couldn't take it anymore, I would stop, take a vacation, rest, recharge, and go right back all and again. But I was on that life's proverbial hamster wheel. So I tore it all down. Here's what it has on your relationships. When you're always on, your relationships suffer. Friends, family, even yourself.
• 3:46
  You can't pour from an empty cup. We tend to fall into this trap because of cultural conditioning. We're taught that success equals working harder, longer, and faster. But success without health is meaningless. Fear of falling behind. Many of us keep grinding because we're afraid of losing our edge. But let me ask you this. What's the point of winning if you're too exhausted to enjoy it?
• 4:14
  There's a false sense of validation. For a long time, I thought being busy meant I was important. But busy doesn't mean effective. And it doesn't mean happy. Think about it. We can run on a treadmill and never move forward. Sure, you're burning some calories, but you're not moving forward. Significance to me meant I was lovable and worthy.
• 4:38
  But I'd work harder to make more money in hopes of earning love. That's not how it's done. In fact, the former method led me down many failed relationships with toxic partners. The wake-up call for me came when the harder I worked, the less money I made. I actually was going in reverse. Similar to moving in quicksand, the funny thing is that I would actually dream that I was in quicksand and couldn't get out of that,
• 5:08
  where my arms weighed hundreds and hundreds of pounds and I couldn't move them. That was a reoccurring dream. Who knows? Maybe it was God talking to me in my sleep. Here's some warning signs that you're out of balance. Physical red flags to look out for are constant fatigue, frequent headaches, poor sleep, dependence on caffeine or energy drinks to get through the day. Ooh, been there, done that. Emotional red flags to look out for.
• 5:37
  feeling irritable, disconnected, or like you're on autopilot. Behavioral red flags are skipping meals, missing workouts, or canceling plans with loved ones because your work always comes first. Be honest. We've all been there. Are you ignoring these signs? Because they won't go away on their
• 6:05
  when none of what used to make you happy makes you happy or sounds interesting anymore. This happens to me with music or podcasts, and this is when I know it's time to take a break. I'll be extremely transparent. I felt this prior to my 16-day vacation at the end of last year. Remember, it's work smarter, not harder. Surrender. Allow God to do his work and get busy being instead of doing.
• 6:35
  Be a human being, not a human doing. So how do you regain control? Glad you ask. Set non-negotiables. Decide what truly matters. Your health, your family, your sanity. And protect those things at all costs. Here's some examples that I use. You hear me say it over and over. My daily workouts. Dinners with my daughter.
• 7:04
  shutting off work notifications after a certain time, blocking your schedule. It's important to schedule your priorities like they're meetings. If it's not on your calendar, it won't happen. Show me your calendar. I'll show you what's important to you. You don't have to do everything yourself. Learn to delegate tasks or use tools to automate repetitive work. If you make six figures, you should have an assistant, at least a virtual assistant.
• 7:32
  Buy back some of your time and get the low-level tax off your plate. Two years ago, I was on my aforementioned year-end vacation that I take every year to recharge. I started years ago and thought, I can't possibly take two weeks off. Everything will fall apart. My business needs me. But after four or five days, relaxation finally set in and I was hooked. It's a non-negotiable for me now.
• 8:01
  Eventually, I'll take the entire month of December off. But back to my story. I was sitting in my hot tub doing a self-analysis with my journal. Now, notice, I was on vacation, relaxing, but still doing a self-analysis. So I try all these things. I do my best. Work still creeps up. It's who I am. So I was sitting in my hot tub, and I was doing a self-analysis in my journal. And I realized I can't stand email.
• 8:31
  Literally, the thought of my inbox made me want to vomit. Two years later, I only answered one to three emails per day. My assistant scrubbed them and most likely responded to most of them. It's a game changer for me. My inbox was a place for other people to place their problems. And results delivering Kelly would always be happy to come through.
• 8:56
  No more. I stopped reacting to everybody else's issues. I let everybody keep their own monkeys. 99 times out of 100, my assistant can do it. As the great Dan Martell says, 80% done by someone else is 100% awesome. I meet with my assistant daily, but it's so worth it. I no longer have to look at my inbox. The role of health and success
• 9:21
  is I gain energy. When you prioritize your health, you have more energy and focus, which actually makes you more productive in less time. A healthy mind leads to better decisions. You're less reactive, more creative, and better equipped to handle challenges. I need you to lead by example. If you're a leader, remember that your team is watching. By prioritizing balance,
• 9:49
  You give them permission to do the same. We run EOS, Entrepreneurial Operating System, for those of you that know, at National Technology Management. We have weekly meetings called Level Tens. We share a personal and professional win each week.
• 10:05
  It's common for my boys to share workout or dieting wins for the week. And then I come in with my crazy 500 workouts or 365 meditations and they all laugh. Perhaps I do take this harder than life living too seriously, but I see it inspiring them. I want to live to 100. I want my work family to all make more money than they ever could anywhere else.
• 10:26
  We did that. It's actually on our vision traction organizational chart, otherwise known as a vision board. I always say feel good, look good, do good. Here's some common pitfalls and how to avoid them. Pitfall number one is guilt. Many of us feel guilty for taking time off, but rest isn't lazy. It's productive. It's productive.
• 10:49
  Second pitfall, you don't have to overhaul your life overnight. Start small, like a 10-minute walk or turning off your emails at 7 p.m. The third pitfall, people-pleasing. Saying yes to everyone else often means saying no to yourself.
• 11:07
  Learning to say no without guilt is a superpower. No is a complete sentence, people. Incorporate it into your life. You don't need to explain. People-pleasing guilt and perfection have all come up in my life at one time or another. People-pleasing is a lack of confidence. It's a lack of self-love. That was the first thing I attacked on my personal development journey.
• 11:33
  By fixing that, I actually address guilt at the same time. As for perfectionism, that continues to be a work in progress as I always want to be right, which I know is wrong. Nobody's perfect, right? I like to think I am, but I'm not. I do want to reiterate this message over and over. Work-life balance isn't a luxury. It's a necessity. If you don't prioritize your health, everything else will suffer.
• 12:03
  Identify one area of imbalance in your life and set a non-negotiable boundary. Protect your health this week. Set one non-negotiable boundary to protect your health this week. Share your commitment with someone who will hold you accountable. We've come all this way for me to disagree with myself. I don't believe it's a work-life balance. I believe it's just a life balance.
• 12:28
  Working is life. Unless you've won the lottery, you still must balance your investments or lose it all, which most do anyway. Studies have shown 70% of lottery winners eventually go broke. They, like all of us, need better balance in their life. It's the right amount of work on oneself, paid work, charitable work, and the work with family that leads to fulfillment.
• 12:54
  That's balance. Be certain to put yourself first. Without you, nothing is possible.
• 13:00
  And at the end of the day, you can't pour from an empty cup. Take care of you because the world needs your best self. Thanks for tuning in. I'm Kelly Siegel reminding you that living hard doesn't mean working harder. It means showing up for yourself first. Until next time, stay balanced and stay strong. Thanks for listening to Harder Than Life. Share this with someone who needs to hear it. And I'll see you next time.
• 13:25
  Please rate and share this podcast. I'm active on all social platforms and love to hear from my Siegel supporters. Each and every episode is sponsored by my company, National Technology Management, the easiest and best IT company to do business with, delivering peace of mind with technology every day, even simplifying cybersecurity. Visit TrustNTM.com for more info. Until next week, be harder than life.