Latest / Libido Lounge / 20 Types of Orgasms Explained: How to Enhance Female Pleasure

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20 Types of Orgasms Explained: How to Enhance Female Pleasure · Libido Lounge

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  Welcome to the libido lounge where we focus on all things love, lust, and libido.
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  We believe that fabulous sex is important to health as exercise and good food.
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  Hey, everybody.
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  Welcome back to another episode on the lounge.
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  I'm so excited to bring on Susan Bratton, intimacy expert to millions.
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  Susan and I have had the fortune of meeting each other a couple times on Summit.
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  I got to spend New Year's with her, and we have the best episode for you guys today.
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  We're gonna talk about difficulty orgasming, how we can overcome this, really how we can
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  focus more and more and more on our pleasure, the differences between women and men, and so
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  much more.
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  So welcome, Susan.
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  So happy to have this conversation with you.
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  Oh, it's so nice to see you again, doctor Diane.
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  Thank you.
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  We've been friends for quite a few years now and done quite a few things together.
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  I think I met you first by doing a book blurb for you.
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  You did.
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  That was the first thing.
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  I was introduced you to write the bad commentary on my book.
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  You sent it to your daughter, and then we've been bouncing around each other since.
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  So so fun.
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  I love it.
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  Good to see you again, and I'm glad you I'm glad that you wanna talk about orgasm because,
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  you know, I would say that if there's anything that I have thought about the most in my life,
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  it's orgasms.
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  I study them.
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  It is my primary interest.
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  And it's interesting because I like to call myself an orgasmanaut.
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  I imagine myself in a silver lame jumpsuit out at the furthest regions of the most exquisite
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  pleasure, learning how to have different kinds of orgasms and hold incredible amounts of
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  sensation in my body and surrendering into it with a level of heart connection to my lovers,
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  with a level of turn on with myself, and with a level of connection to what I what I call
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  source or Gaia, that connection to all of us as humanity.
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  So my orgasm is something that I consider to be a very alive part of my life, an evolving,
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  maturing, expanding fireball of pleasure and joy that really fuels so much of what I do.
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  And I went at no.
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  I'm 62.
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  I'll be 63 next month.
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  I'm having the best orgasms of my life.
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  Amazing sex.
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  And at 42, I started on the journey of learning how to have orgasms because I could only have
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  one orgasm using my twenty years ago rabbit vibrator.
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  And I almost got divorced because I didn't wanna have sex with my husband because I wasn't
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  orgasming from intercourse, and I had intercourse with him for twelve years and never
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  had an orgasm and just was really just disillusioned by it all.
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  And it almost ruined my life and my marriage.
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  I've been with him thirty two years now.
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  We have sex that keeps getting better.
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  I have 20 different kinds of orgasms, and it's what I love to teach people to do.
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  And there's so many myths and misunderstandings about it that what I love about giving people
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  information about their orgasmic potential is that when I tell them things and they go, oh,
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  oh, I didn't realize that was what it was, it's like an instant change.
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  There are so many things where it's like, I just was working under misinformation, and now
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  that I know what to do, I'm having orgasms.
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  And so that's what's so nice about it.
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  It's very rewarding, for me and for the person having all the orgasms.
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  Like, there's so much hope in what you just said because I know we have people listening
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  that are listening like, oh my gosh.
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  She's in 20 different types of orgasms.
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  Like, I would just like to have one.
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  Yeah.
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  Right?
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  And so and there there's so much hope in in explaining that.
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  Like, where does somebody that either has never had an orgasm or is like, well, okay.
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  You they have this orgasm in, like, one type of way like you're describing, and it is just like
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  it's something.
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  It's not really, like, that exciting.
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  It's not very motivating.
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  Like, what what do you have to say to that just from a standpoint of, like, encouraging people
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  that are in that that camp?
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  Yeah.
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  When I talk about the 20 kinds of orgasms, I the last thing I wanna do is have people be
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  discouraged.
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  What I want you to understand is that there are many, many paths to orgasm, what I like to call
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  orgasmic cross training.
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  And, essentially, once you start getting one path to orgasm, you can spin up more paths so
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  that almost everything can make you come after a while.
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  And there's a couple of different things that you need to know to so so put aside the
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  discouragement that you've had, and let's talk about orgasmic activation because it's very
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  similar.
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  So you have let's just talk about the three I'm gonna take you through a couple of big picture
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  things.
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  There's three kinds of orgasms.
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  There's locations to touch, your clitoris, your g spot, your nipples, things like that.
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  There are orgasmic techniques like erotic hypnosis, where you can orgasm from the sig the
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  verbal suggestion of it.
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  That's a pretty interesting one.
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  Or expanded orgasms, which is a practice, a clitoral stroking practice that I've been
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  practicing for decades that has helped me really become orgasmic in a lot of other ways
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  as well that uses a five stroke technique.
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  It's like a a yoga form or any kind of thing that you're doing to the operating system of
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  your body to elicit a specific response.
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  In this case, an orgasm that is stretched out where time is like taffy.
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  And when you have the orgasm, it's not just this fleeting little moment.
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  It's this really long, pleasurable orgasmic sensation.
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  That's the, you know, the kind of the the strategies, the technologies, if you will.
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  And then the third is objects of desire.
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  And objects of desire could be anything that turns you on.
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  But one of my favorite categories for orgasmic cross training, learning how to activate all
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  these different parts of your body so that they all kind of come online and become orgasmic is
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  using sex tools.
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  I don't think they're toys because I'm not playing around Diane.
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  They are tools, tools of pleasure.
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  And it turns out that for the female body, there are eight types of tools that you can use
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  to activate the different parts of your body so that you can have different kinds of orgasms
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  and lots of stuff makes you come as you get better and better at it.
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  So orgasms are a learned skill.
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  There are lots of kinds of them.
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  You can have more and more of them as you activate different areas.
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  One link I wanna give you right now is to orgasmiccrosstraining.com because orgasmic
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  cross training has the eight tools for the female body and the four tools for the male
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  body that help you achieve all of these different kinds of orgasms.
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  So what's nice is that you can use the tools in solo pleasuring to wake up that mind body
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  connection, which is the next piece I wanna introduce to this.
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  And then when you're with a partner, it's much easier to have orgasms with or without the
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  tools because you've had you've created the neural pathways.
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  So one of my friends, doctor Nan Wise, she recently wrote a book called Why Good Sex
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  Matters, and she's a neuroscientist slash therapist, sexual therapist.
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  And she's done a great amount of work, clinical research by putting women in MRIs and
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  stimulating different parts of their body and noticing that it lights up different parts of
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  our brain.
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  So there are a lot of parts of our body that can be orgasmic.
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  And if you're not currently having orgasms from stimulating certain areas, like I can orgasm
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  from clitoral stimulation, but I can't orgasm from, penile penetration.
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  I can orgasm from, you know, from intercourse, but I can't orgasm when my g spot is pleasured.
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  I have never experienced female ejaculation, or it happens to me every time I have sex.
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  People have different halves that they've kind of figured out or honed, but the other ones can
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  just be added right in over time by stimulating the different parts of your genital system and
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  other erogenous zones, like orgasms from your belly, footgasms, orogasms, throatgasms,
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  nipplegasms, and breastgasms.
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  These are all erogenous zones that can be highly orgasmic.
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  So I didn't used to have any kind of orgasm, but the one and done clitoral kind of poof, and
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  that was it.
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  And the thing is that we've been really under what I would call patriarchal sexuality mores
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  and still using things like the old nineteen sixties Masters and Johnsons concept of orgasm,
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  which is really tied much more to a male ejaculatory orgasm, a one and done, when
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  actually all bodies, including male bodies, penis owning bodies, are massively multi
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  orgasmic from lots of stimulation.
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  So when you touch a location in your body and you you think to yourself, it feels numb or it
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  feels painful or it feels shameful instead of pleasurable.
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  All I want you to know right now is that you can transform, active, act activate, awaken the
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  pleasure by giving it loving touch.
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  That over time, when you approach your orgasm as expanding your sensation and the mind body
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  connection and bringing in some of the the the extra reinforcements that you might need, and
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  we can talk about what those are, the extra reinforcements to kind of activate the orgasm
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  so that once you have it, you can start having them reliably.
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  That's really a good way to think about it is that the female body is massively
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  multiorgasmic, and she learns more over time as you begin to play with her.
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  I love it.
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  It and I think where I wanna go.
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  I wanna come back to the extra enforcements because I think that's important.
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  But I also wanna bring up this whole thing that I I see happen so much time, which is, like,
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  orgasmic pressure, right, where it's like there is this discrepancy between the, you know,
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  Rosemary Bassan's arousal, you know, model of arousal and the Masters and Johnson and other
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  models out there.
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  But I think it's led to this cultural thing where there's this destination and men
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  oftentimes and partners in general, not just men.
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  We have this desire to provide pleasure to our partners.
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  Right?
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  That's just a, I think, a human thing.
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  And so with orgasm, there can be, like, a pressure for one partner to be like, oh, I
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  wanna make sure the other partner orgasms because I don't wanna provide that person
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  pleasure.
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  And then on that receiving end, it can be more like, well, I wanna make sure I get to orgasm
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  in part because I wanna experience it, but also I want to that other person to know they did a
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  good job for me.
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  And it's just pressure, pressure, pressure around orgasm.
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  So how do we get out of that?
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  How do we break down, like, the orgasmic pressure that comes, I think, bidirectionally
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  in couples?
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  Yeah.
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  It's called performance anxiety, and it affects everyone.
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  We all worry.
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  But the more that you learn to have orgasms, the more confident you get that they're going
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  to happen, the more that you understand that it's not something that you can affect, but
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  instead that it's something that you allow.
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  I think that's a big difference as well is that all of your orgasms are in there, and they want
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  to come out like a well spring, a beautiful cool spring is just bursting from the earth and
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  flowing out.
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  That's how they work.
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  You're you don't have to go in there and stick a pipe down in the earth and suck orgasms out.
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  You can actually just allow them to come up.
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  And I like to call that birthing your orgasm, which is much less about squeezing down and
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  trying and more about opening and allowing.
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  And so that's a nice little reframe as well.
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  There's another thing that I wanted to say too, which was that I will tell you if I had a
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  nickel for every person who said to me, don't don't sex toys make it more difficult for you
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  to orgasm if you don't have one?
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  Don't they desensitize you?
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  I think that goes back to, religious repressed patriarchal cultural mores again that we're
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  trying to break free of as women.
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  And, no, in fact, it's the opposite.
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  And as a matter of fact, the newest toy that it's funny.
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  I have it right here.
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  The newest toy that I'm working with I work with a company called Fun Factory quite a bit.
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  I'm a I'm a one of their, you know, fairly important influencers.
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  And they they just launched this new toy called the sundaes.
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  I can have one sent to you if you'd like me to.
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  And Right.
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  What I like about it is that they are now, designing this particular tool to stimulate
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  three different types of nerve endings, something called Merkle's discs, something
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  called Pacinian corpuscles, and another one called Ruffini endings.
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  And the way that they're doing that is they're actually taking this toy, and they part of it
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  is penetrating vibration, part of it is tapping vibration, and part of it is how you use it on
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  the body.
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  And so tools are getting very sophisticated.
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  And what happens is that when you use a toy and I'll show you, Diane.
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  I know we're really on audio, but I will show you that I sitting next to me, I have my
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  mother's crystal candy bowl full of all these cross training toys that are at Orgasmic Cross
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  Training.
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  All the toys I recommend from all the different categories, the air stimulators, the liquors,
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  the g spots, the thrusters, the rabbits, and the wand.
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  The wand doesn't fit in my bowl, but it's right here.
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  And what's important to understand is that each one of these is actually stimulating different
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  parts of the vulvovaginal area.
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  And so what's happening as you're tapping, thrusting, licking, sucking, all these areas is
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  that your brain is going, oh, Oh.
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  Oh, I feel that.
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  Oh, do I like that?
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  And this is where you get into the adding in the other components piece of having more
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  orgasmic capacity, where all of a sudden you're laying down these neural pathways and your body
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  is like, oh, yeah.
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  I like that.
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  Oh, that feels good.
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  Oh, oh, that's nice.
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  And pretty soon, you're starting to have orgasms from all kinds of different locations
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  that you're stimulating, in the in in your genital anatomy because though the tip of the
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  clitoris, of course, has the 10,000 nerve endings, it has little arms, it has big legs,
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  it has a clitoral body, it has a urethral sponge, It has a perineal sponge.
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  It has vaginal mucosal lining.
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  It has the cervical area as what was your friend who just did a good that good episode
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  about the cervical orgasms?
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  Jamie Thompson.
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  Jamie Thompson.
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  She was really good.
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  If you didn't listen to that episode of Diane's show, go back and listen to Jamie.
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  I thought that was very nice.
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  She did a really good job.
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  And so what's great about it is that these tools stimulate the signals to the brain.
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  So the brain wakes up, and then they start to light up more and more, and then it starts to
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  feel really good.
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  And then all of a sudden, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, you're knocking down all
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  these kinds of orgasms.
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  They're flowing out of you.
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  You have less performance anxiety.
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  You enter into a lovemaking date confident that it's simply a matter of time.
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  Diane, I wanted to tell you about a lovemaking date I had yesterday just as soon as possible.
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  Yeah.
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  Tell me a story.
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  AI?
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  Please.
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  So yesterday afternoon, the sunlight was streaming into my bed.
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  I'd gone on a bike ride with my lover, and we had taken a shower and we laid down on the bed
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  right in the swath of the sunshine.
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  And I said, can you rub some of this THC pain cream on my chest where I I got some sunburn
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  because my bikini top was lower than the last one I wore the other day?
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  And sure, sweetheart.
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  I can do that.
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  And then I said, could you rub this mother butter into my my thighs, my shins, and my
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  arms?
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  Sure, baby.
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  He did that.
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  And then I said, could you rub this Awaken Arousal Oil on my whole vulva all the way out
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  to my groin, even including my mons and down kind of almost to my perineum?
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  But don't go inside, just all on the outside.
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  Sure, Precious.
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  Let me do that for you.
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  How's that?
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  Does it feel good?
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  Yes.
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  And then I said, okay.
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  Could you use the breast oil now?
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  And could you rub it on my breasts?
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  And could you play with my boobs and my nipples?
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  And could we make out now?
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  And he said, of course, I'd love to do that.
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  And so, you know, so, one one guy would be like, well, he certainly takes direction well.
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  You're basically just bossing him around.
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  But my boyfriend would never think about that.
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  What are the benefits for him?
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  Well, she always tells me exactly what she needs to surrender to her pleasure.
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  She always has new ideas for fun.
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  I love that every time we make love, her body wants something different, and she's so tuned
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  into it that she knows what it is, and she just tells me so I don't have to guess.
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  And I love how relaxing it is to be with her.
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  There's never any rush.
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  She takes her time and allows herself to get turned on at the pace that is whatever her body
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  is telling her that day.
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  And it just calms me down too because I don't have performance anxiety because she doesn't
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  have performance anxiety.
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  And I always love to give her so many orgasms.
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  I love how responsive she is.
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  And we kept going with that date.
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  But I think that for a lot of women, just hearing a story like that where it would be
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  okay for them to ask for anything and everything that they want in the moment in an
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  ongoing conversation throughout every lovemaking date is still a very foreign thing.
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  And I just want women to feel like there is not only nothing wrong with that, that's what makes
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  sex great because we are different every moment of every day.
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  We run with the moon.
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  And the moon waxes and wanes and changes us from kitty cats to to lionesses in any given
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  moment.
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  And so we could start off feeling, like, really far from our pleasure or super turned on and
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  ready to go.
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  But until we really listen to ourselves and we use these lips to speak for these lips, we
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  can't really get to that full, you know, relaxation and and having no performance
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  anxiety.
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  And I think that's one of the biggest tips is just what does she want?
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  What does your body want?
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  Listen to her and speak for her in all moments.
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  I love that.
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  And the other thing I wanna point out when you said that I think is so important is that that
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  allowing her to become turned on, right, versus like, okay.
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  We are going right into intercourse in this moment.
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  Lube it up.
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  Go right in, and that thing that winds up happening versus saying, like, oh, it's okay if
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  she needs an hour today.
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  She might need seven minutes tomorrow.
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  Like, there's there's that flexibility.
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  And and I also think there's so much to be said about from that safety perspective around,
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  like, if we can speak in from a standpoint of being self advocates, it does oftentimes lead
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  to that relaxation of our erogenous zones and and that allowing of that orgasm to occur.
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  So I just love all of that.
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  I I know we're running out of time today, so my question for you is around this concept of
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  orgasm, amiss if we did not?
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  Yeah.
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  I was thinking that we promised the you know, what are the other things you can do to help
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  yourself come to orgasm?
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  I think that's what we should talk about to close now.
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  The very first thing so a lot of solo pleasuring with toys.
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  I recommend that.
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  You don't there's it's been you use an oral irrigator.
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  You use a toothbrush.
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  You use an instant pot.
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  You drive a car.
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  Use toys.
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  Fill up your pleasure chest with the orgasmic.
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  Whatever ones you want out of the orgasmic cross training or whatever looks good for you.
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  It's just nice to see the categories so you can be like, oh, I'd like to try an air simulator.
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  Oh, I'd like to try a thruster.
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  You know, whatever it might be.
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  And the second thing is you can double up on toys.
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  You can triple up on toys.
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  You can put a a little booty plug in.
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  You can put a thruster or a dildo inside you or a g spot wand.
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  You can add a wand or a vibrator or an air stimulator on your clitoris.
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  Load them up, girls.
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  Ain't no shame in coming super well, super long, super hard, and lots and lots.
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  That's another thing.
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  The the third thing is I have a a pleasure protocol that I recommend, and I'll send you
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  some, Diane.
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  I I'm sorry.
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  I didn't think to send this to you earlier.
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  But, it's, three products.
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  I'll show it to you.
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  I'll get I'll get your address so I can send it to you.
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  There's an Awake and Arousal Oil, and then and that goes on the outer vulva.
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  That's what my boyfriend put on me.
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  And then there's Melts.
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  Those go inside the vagina, and it's cocoa butter, CBD, and botanicals that melts
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  intravaginally.
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  They also have non CBD versions, by the way.
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  It's all at pleasureprotocol.com.
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  And those really feel very nice for intercourse.
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  And CBD activates the mind body connection, which is what you're going for.
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  The reason your brain is your biggest sex organ is that it's what processes stimulation into
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  pleasurable sensation.
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  It tells you it feels good.
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  You've gotta get the mind going with the vulva.
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  And the CBD uses the endocannabinoid system to do just that.
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  It's they're hormones signaling hormones.
• 25:10
  And then the third one is sex oil for as much slide and glide as you want when you make love
• 25:16
  or anytime that you're just wanting a good yoni massage or what have you.
• 25:21
  And they work together really well.
• 25:24
  So add those in so you're getting that activation.
• 25:29
  The Awaken is almost like a pre lubricant.
• 25:32
  And then do nipple stimulation while you're using the tools on your genitals because your
• 25:41
  mouth and your nipples and breasts are a three legged stool of your arousal.
• 25:48
  And your arousal is not just direct stimulation.
• 25:51
  It's full body stimulation.
• 25:54
  So getting and remember, even if you think to yourself, well, my breasts aren't very
• 25:58
  sensitive.
• 25:58
  My nipples aren't very sensitive.
• 26:00
  I didn't have nipple orgasms until I started pleasuring my nipples.
• 26:04
  Now I can come and come and come just from my nipples being touched ever so slightly.
• 26:13
  And it's amazing.
• 26:15
  And it gets your vulva, your internal erectile tissue, the three erectile tissue systems of
• 26:23
  the vulva, which is as big as all the erectile tissue in the penis.
• 26:28
  It's just in three little compartments, it it starts to get the blood flow from the inside
• 26:35
  out rather than just expecting everything to come from the outside in.
• 26:38
  So it gives you a deep, really nice engorgement.
• 26:42
  Engorgement is where the blood flows in.
• 26:44
  It expands the erectile tissue.
• 26:46
  It creates more surface area, which then when it's stimulated, sends more pleasure signals to
• 26:52
  your brain to register more pleasure.
• 26:54
  So that woman who's like, I don't I can't really I can't really it doesn't feel like
• 26:59
  much.
• 26:59
  I feel like, that's lack of engorgement.
• 27:03
  And so stimulating the other areas and then fantasy.
• 27:08
  Think the dirtiest things you can think of, the taboo things, the things you'd never even tell.
• 27:15
  Me and everybody tells me everything.
• 27:18
  Think those dirty, dirty thoughts that turn you on.
• 27:21
  Because fantasy is healthy.
• 27:23
  Fantasy gets the juices running.
• 27:26
  It really relaxes you, and it gets you turned on.
• 27:29
  And everything that I've said today on this show, and thank you again for having me.
• 27:35
  I love talking about orgasms.
• 27:37
  You're gonna keep getting better and better and better as you do it.
• 27:41
  So if your fantasies start off pretty tame, give it a year.
• 27:45
  Oh, girl.
• 27:47
  You're gonna be thinking the dirtiest things.
• 27:49
  And then over time, some of them might actually become realities because you're just maturing
• 27:56
  sexually.
• 27:57
  You're entering into your orgasm era right the hell now.
• 28:02
  And so those are some of the things that can really, really help you.
• 28:07
  Fantastic.
• 28:08
  This has been so wonderful.
• 28:10
  And
• 28:11
  Good.
• 28:11
  I hope
• 28:11
  you guys have been scribbling notes down like crazy.
• 28:14
  Remember, you can download this episode, though, and go back and listen to it a million
• 28:18
  times.
• 28:18
  And definitely do that because as I've been saying for this entire year now, whichever
• 28:24
  guest has the most downloads, the most shares, likes, comments, etcetera, we're gonna invite
• 28:29
  them back at the end of twenty twenty four to do a very deep dive on all these topics and
• 28:35
  more, and I I certainly want Susan back.
• 28:38
  I could talk to you all day, Susan.
• 28:39
  Thanks.
• 28:40
  Also, just remember that it's a sexy season.
• 28:42
  In sexy season, we have a ton of giveaways and promotional things.
• 28:46
  And remember, if you screenshot if you rate our podcast and screenshot it, send it into us, and
• 28:52
  we have a lot of raffles and giveaways.
• 28:54
  Our twenty one day libido jump start deep dive, we're giving away a thousand dollar value to
• 29:00
  one person.
• 29:01
  So a lot of cool things there.
• 29:02
  Make sure you register.
• 29:03
  Susan, we'll have your links for the, for the orgasmic cross training and the pleasure
• 29:09
  protocol.
• 29:09
  We'll have all of those links of yours in the show notes.
• 29:13
  And just thank you again today for coming on.
• 29:15
  It's a pleasure as always to talk to you.
• 29:17
  Yeah.
• 29:17
  Let me get you a Sundays for your giveaway.
• 29:20
  Let me get you some Forria pleasure protocols for your giveaway.
• 29:23
  How about that?
• 29:24
  I would love that.
• 29:25
  Yeah.
• 29:25
  It'll be my pleasure.
• 29:26
  Let's give
• 29:26
  you that.
• 29:27
  I can also give you a bunch of my programs, my books and programs to give away if you'd like
• 29:32
  to have those.
• 29:32
  I'm thinking maybe That's fine.
• 29:34
  Sexual Soulmates, Expand Her Orgasm Tonight, Female Liquid Orgasm, my steamy sex ed video
• 29:40
  collection.
• 29:40
  Why don't I give you one of each of those to give away as well?
• 29:44
  That's amazing, you guys.
• 29:46
  Sexy season just got sexier and hotter.
• 29:48
  We have so many giveaways now.
• 29:50
  So please do please do rate us.
• 29:52
  Please do review.
• 29:53
  We'll get you in this raffle.
• 29:54
  And now not only do we have a bunch of stuff from me, we have a bunch of stuff from the
• 29:58
  amazing Susan Bratton to give away as well.
• 30:00
  So gonna sign off for today, reminding you all to feel sexy, stay classy, and always be a
• 30:07
  little badass y.
• 30:08
  See you next time.