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My Boyfriend’s Secret Debt + Should We Use Our Savings to Pay Off His Business Debt? · She's On The Money

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Speaker 1: My name's Tatasha Bamblet. I'm a proud First Nations woman
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Speaker 1: and I'm here to acknowledge country t Glenn Young Ganya
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Speaker 1: nian Ar Kaka yah y and Binahwaka nian Ar gay
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Speaker 1: In Mbini yakarum Jar, Dominyagumika, Umaga Ihowaka Nile Waman damon Immalan,
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Speaker 1: Bumba bang gadabomba in and now in Waka ghana on
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Speaker 1: yak rum Jar Watanadaa. Hello, beautiful friends, we gather on
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Speaker 1: the lands of the Aboriginal people. We thank acknowledge and
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Speaker 1: respect the Aberiginal people's land that we're gathering on today.
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Speaker 1: Take pleasure in all the land and respect all that
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Speaker 1: you see. She's on the Money podcast acknowledges culture, country,
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Speaker 1: community and connections, bringing you the tools, knowledge and resources
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Speaker 1: for you to thrive.
0:44
Speaker 2: She's on the Money.
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Speaker 3: She's on the Money.
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Speaker 4: Hello and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast
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Speaker 4: that makes your personal finance is fun, especially on Fridays.
0:57
Speaker 4: The gang's all here for another edition of drinks where
1:00
Speaker 4: we get together to celebrate you are very clever. She's
1:04
Speaker 4: on the Money Community as always, Miss Jess agreed. She's
1:07
Speaker 4: here sharing your marvelous money wins, and Beck is back
1:10
Speaker 4: with another batch of broke tips to get you through
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Speaker 4: the week. We'll also be answering your debt related dms
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Speaker 4: and money dilemmas. And while we're usually talking about your debt,
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Speaker 4: this dilemma is about the debt our partners bring into relationships.
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Speaker 4: I think it's bound to spark some arguably very interesting
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Speaker 4: conversations and we're always looking for juicy money dilemmas to
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Speaker 4: discuss and hopefully solve on the pod. So if you've
1:35
Speaker 4: always wanted a question answered, head on over to our
1:38
Speaker 4: website and leave us a little voice note. Who knows
1:41
Speaker 4: your dilemma might just make the cut for our next episode. Now,
1:45
Speaker 4: something that we simply couldn't cut from this episode, it's
1:48
Speaker 4: our five star reviews.
1:50
Speaker 3: We love them.
1:50
Speaker 4: It's a buffet of compliments from you, our beautiful listeners,
1:54
Speaker 4: for us, your beautiful co hosts. We simply cannot get
1:58
Speaker 4: enough of it. So please, please, please, please please share
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Speaker 4: your reviews if She's on the Money with us on Spotify,
2:04
Speaker 4: on Apple podcasts, on socials, honestly, wherever they will legally
2:07
Speaker 4: let you this review. Are you ready, guys?
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Speaker 3: Ready?
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Speaker 4: It comes from our friend, Megan. Now, when I say
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Speaker 4: our friend, I don't know if I have to clarify this.
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Speaker 4: These are just our community members. But I just think
2:18
Speaker 4: that everyone is a friend that we haven't met yet.
2:20
Speaker 4: Of course, because someone DMed me and said, Victoria, why
2:22
Speaker 4: do you keep getting your friends to write reviews? And
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Speaker 4: I was like, I need to be clearer here. We
2:28
Speaker 4: are just friends that haven't met yet. And Megan says.
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Speaker 4: I found She's on the money at a time when
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Speaker 4: life felt like it had really been tipped upside down.
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Speaker 4: My husband had just decided, at the age of thirty eight,
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Speaker 4: to pursue an electrical apprenticeship, something I was genuinely proud
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Speaker 4: of him doing. But when his salary suddenly dropped by
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Speaker 4: half and we were juggling a mortgage, a Carlow, and
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Speaker 4: a credit card and two kids in daycare, it was
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Speaker 4: a bit of an O shit moment for us. She's
2:56
Speaker 4: on the Money became my lifeline. Victoria and the team
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Speaker 4: didn't teach me how to budget. They taught me how
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Speaker 4: to take control, how to make decisions that actually moved
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Speaker 4: us forward instead of just keeping us afloat. Fast forward
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Speaker 4: to twenty twenty six and my husband is three weeks
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Speaker 4: away from finishing his apprenticeship. We have no card debt,
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Speaker 4: no credit card and emergency fund. Personal insurances have been sorted,
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Speaker 4: our wills are done, and we have healthy superbalances. We
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Speaker 4: didn't just survive that season, we rebuilt our entire financial foundation.
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Speaker 4: Five stars just doesn't feel like enough for what this
3:30
Speaker 4: podcast has actually meant for our family. Oh my god, Wow,
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Speaker 4: that's incredible, Meghan, Thank you and my friends. Keep them coming,
3:41
Speaker 4: because it's not just about stroking our little egos. Getting
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Speaker 4: to understand how the show has actually helped create the
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Speaker 4: lives you deserve is magic, Like it's actually magic. Being like, sorry, Meghan,
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Speaker 4: what do you mean? You mean that our silly little
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Speaker 4: podcast where we get to have out each week changed
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Speaker 4: your life.
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Speaker 3: That's crazy. That is so impressive.
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Speaker 4: It's insane. All right, So now for the moment I
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Speaker 4: think everybody has been waiting for this week's silly little question,
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Speaker 4: That moment on Friday Drinks where you finally get answers
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Speaker 4: to the questions that have been puzzling you arguably all week.
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Speaker 4: And I'm consistently confused about why you're thinking about things.
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Speaker 4: But that's okay. This week's question came through our Instagram
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Speaker 4: dms from a community member who wishes to remain anonymous. Okay, humble,
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Speaker 4: and she asks, if you could magically be confluent in
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Speaker 4: any language, what would it be.
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Speaker 2: Oh, you know what, with one technology making languages so
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Speaker 2: much more accessible, like with your Google Translate and things
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Speaker 2: like that, I don't feel like I yearn for another
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Speaker 2: language in the way I maybe did when I was younger.
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Speaker 3: Yeah, back in the day.
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Speaker 2: If you want to travel somewhere, the only way you
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Speaker 2: would be able to communicate would be to learn a
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Speaker 2: bit of it. And like even still now when I travel,
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Speaker 2: I try and learn you know, hello and thank you
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Speaker 2: and please, and you know, all of your basic where
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Speaker 2: is the bathroom whatever?
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Speaker 3: I'm not gonna lie like Queen.
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Speaker 4: Beck when Jess and I were in France. Funniest thing ever,
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Speaker 4: because Gessur has to be so insanely polite, like she's
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Speaker 4: just always so polite. She'd like tried to do these
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Speaker 4: like greetings and say hello and thank you so much
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Speaker 4: that she'd just kind of stare at them blankly for
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Speaker 4: a hot second when she lost her words, and you
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Speaker 4: could see these French people being like, honey, it's okay,
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Speaker 4: I speak English.
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Speaker 3: Just to be like, no, I know my basics and
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Speaker 3: that's it. So it's like I don't know. I do
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Speaker 3: think French is a beautiful language.
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Speaker 2: I used to be relatively fluent in Italian because my
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Speaker 2: family is Italian and I learned it in school for
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Speaker 2: like six years, but I've lost the muscle memory. It
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Speaker 2: would be kind of nice to pick that up again
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Speaker 2: and be able to really have a proper conversation. Like
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Speaker 2: I can read and I can kind of follow along
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Speaker 2: a conversation, but not in the way that I could
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Speaker 2: when I was younger, which is.
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Speaker 3: A bit sad. No, it's your cooler se that.
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Speaker 2: And then like Italian and Friends, there's a lot of
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Speaker 2: crossover or very comparable phrasing, and so it's kind of
6:04
Speaker 2: like if you can get by with one, you can
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Speaker 2: get by with the other.
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Speaker 3: So yeah, maybe that would be nice.
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Speaker 5: Yeah, this is separate to what I actually want, but
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Speaker 5: I have always wanted to learn Mandarin, and I just
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Speaker 5: know it's like so complex. Well I think it's so complex,
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Speaker 5: but everything that's not English feels really complex.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, so Mandarin.
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Speaker 5: But also the main one is like Bengali or Hindu
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Speaker 5: because my family speak that and I don't. And there's
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Speaker 5: something really impressive about like when you're with your friend
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Speaker 5: who has like a non English speaking parent and they're
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Speaker 5: like they're hearing their parent talk and then responding in English.
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Speaker 5: The way their brain it's so insane, Like the way
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Speaker 5: I can argue back but English to something they just
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Speaker 5: heard that is not at all in English. Yeah, Like
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Speaker 5: that is the coolest thing I've ever seen, And so
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Speaker 5: I would like to do that one day. So I
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Speaker 5: think Bengali and Hindu, I know, the two different things
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Speaker 5: that could be so cool, that would be really cool,
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Speaker 5: And do you Mandarin.
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Speaker 4: Sits at the top of my list. I think because
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Speaker 4: I just maybe because I have a background in business
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Speaker 4: and commerce. I'm like, well, that's you know, the number
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Speaker 4: one language in the entire world. That would open up
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Speaker 4: a whole different demographic. Like being able to speak Mandarin
7:17
Speaker 4: would be very very cool. Yeah, And I guess from
7:20
Speaker 4: a more interest based perspective, I just like the idea
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Speaker 4: that it's like not is it like the English alphabet,
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Speaker 4: like just having something completely different or like Islamic or
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Speaker 4: something where it's so different, and like there's just I
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Speaker 4: don't know, there's just so many words that I think
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Speaker 4: have deeper meaning than you can have in English. That's
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Speaker 4: so true, you know what I mean, Like when people
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Speaker 4: say in Shilla, I'm like, that is just such a
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Speaker 4: magic word, and I just go nothing in English compares, Like,
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Speaker 4: give me a language that I don't know has a
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Speaker 4: bit more depth.
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Speaker 3: Yeah, I know, you mean that's so beautiful.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, so that's where I would got a good question.
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Speaker 3: That's a great question, thank you.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, not the Indonesian I learned for like two weeks
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Speaker 4: same pogy punk Trasic, which that was my teacher's name,
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Speaker 4: and I also had to learn sorry I'm late, mister
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Speaker 4: trasik Oh, of course. Yeah, one out of ten that
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Speaker 4: was consistent for me. All Right, if you guys have
8:20
Speaker 4: a good submission for Question of the Week, please slide
8:23
Speaker 4: into our DMS with your most lateral or even most
8:26
Speaker 4: literal questions and it might just get featured on an
8:29
Speaker 4: episode of She's on the Money. Remember literally, nothing is
8:33
Speaker 4: too random or too niche. And yes, we would actually
8:36
Speaker 4: still love you if you were a worm.
8:38
Speaker 2: To as question, the cutest worm I've ever seen, you
8:41
Speaker 2: are the hottest worm, Like I would still remain married
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Speaker 2: to you, my husband.
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Speaker 4: The questions that man gets rip him. Mister Sagricci, would
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Speaker 4: you kindly share this week's money wins with us absolutely.
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Speaker 2: First of this week, I've got one from Taylor, who
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Speaker 2: said money win. We needed a new dress so for
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Speaker 2: our bedroom and I found one that I liked online.
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Speaker 2: It was on sale, obviously, but unfortunately our address was
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Speaker 2: outside of the free Metro delivery area. I called my
9:08
Speaker 2: local store and asked how much delivery would be, and
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Speaker 2: she quoted me one hundred and twenty nine dollars. I
9:13
Speaker 2: asked if there was any wiggle room on the price
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Speaker 2: of the dresser, which there wasn't because it was a
9:17
Speaker 2: catalog item, but since I had asked, she offered to
9:19
Speaker 2: book me in for free delivery. Always worth calling and asking.
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Speaker 2: I say, five hundred dollars on the dresser and one
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Speaker 2: hundred and twenty nine dollars on delivery.
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Speaker 3: Oh my god, it's so good.
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Speaker 2: Next, I've got a money win from Lauren, who said
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Speaker 2: my partner and I had our first finance date. To me,
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Speaker 2: this is a massive money win because my partner doesn't
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Speaker 2: love the idea of talking about money or long term goals.
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Speaker 2: He's more of a live in the moment sort of guy.
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Speaker 2: So to sit down and chat about long term financial goals.
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Speaker 2: Was massive, and we're now going to start doing this regularly.
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Speaker 1: I love you.
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Speaker 3: How cute is that?
9:47
Speaker 2: Then Sienna has said public transport is free in VIC
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Speaker 2: for another month and then half price for the rest
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Speaker 2: of the year. I don't have a cast, so I
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Speaker 2: will save four hundred dollars from April to the end
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Speaker 2: of May, and then I'll save another one hundred dollars
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Speaker 2: a month.
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Speaker 3: For the rest of the year as well. Wow, really good.
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Speaker 4: That's such a good deal.
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Speaker 3: I know, make use of that, guys, you might as well.
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Speaker 2: And then lastly, this week, I've got one from Samantha
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Speaker 2: who said I've returned back to work part time after
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Speaker 2: twelve months maternity leave. My husband read the fine print
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Speaker 2: of his primary care policy at work. He did the paperwork,
10:18
Speaker 2: and he's now off for three months with our son
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Speaker 2: while I go back. It's almost three months of childcare
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Speaker 2: saved and they get to bond and I am so.
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Speaker 4: So happy for magic. That's so flat read a fine print, everybody,
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Speaker 4: honestly even just look into it. I feel like so
10:32
Speaker 4: many people just assume that if one partner has taken
10:36
Speaker 4: time off, the other can't.
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Speaker 3: Yeah, so check it out. Policy. I agree, there's a
10:42
Speaker 3: lot of money on childcare saved.
10:44
Speaker 4: Oh my goodness. And also just having that time with
10:46
Speaker 4: your kids. Yeah, where you're not financially stressed. Yeah, money
10:51
Speaker 4: win money. We absolutely now beck our community crave broke tips.
10:55
Speaker 4: They're always asking me why does she only do three?
10:58
Speaker 4: But we've got a limity. Some we've got to put
11:00
Speaker 4: a cap on it. What have you got for this
11:01
Speaker 4: week twenty if you like, we've got to say some
11:05
Speaker 4: content for other weeks.
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Speaker 5: Okay, So this first one comes from Layla who This
11:10
Speaker 5: is a new South Wales thing I believe, but it
11:13
Speaker 5: is like a new rental i'd say, like legal requirements,
11:17
Speaker 5: So it's mainly benefiting renters.
11:20
Speaker 3: Do you apologize to the landlords?
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Speaker 5: Basically, what they're doing is that there's just going to
11:23
Speaker 5: be one standard application form and real estate agents and
11:26
Speaker 5: companies can't charge a fee for kind of keeping their
11:30
Speaker 5: information on file. They just can't do anying dodgy. It's
11:32
Speaker 5: just gonna be one stock, standard, run of the mill
11:35
Speaker 5: application form for all renters.
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Speaker 3: Is bad?
11:39
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, pretty sure, which is really good because historically,
11:42
Speaker 2: like application application, you'd have to check your fine print
11:45
Speaker 2: for again, like details around pets, or you don't need
11:48
Speaker 2: to clean when I leave my lease and all those
11:49
Speaker 2: sorts of things. When they standardize it, the rules are
11:52
Speaker 2: generally the same across the ward.
11:54
Speaker 5: Yes, exactly. So I think that will be really really
11:56
Speaker 5: good and hopefully help, especially in this rental crisis.
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Speaker 3: So thank you so much.
12:01
Speaker 5: Later, And this next one comes from Anna and she
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Speaker 5: sent me this. I know that I've mentioned tight Asses
12:06
Speaker 5: of Melbourne it's an Instagram page before, but there's a
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Speaker 5: new one. Twenty dollars at Hope Street Radio on Sundays
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Speaker 5: roast chicken and potatoes and gravy, which is.
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Speaker 4: Usually upwards of thirty eight dollars.
12:16
Speaker 5: I don't know about you guys, but whenever I go
12:18
Speaker 5: get a roach, I've had a thirty dollar roast before.
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Speaker 5: It's twenty dollars at Hope Street Radio on Sundays.
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Speaker 4: Not for a slice of roast. I can understand the steak.
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Speaker 4: I've wrapped my head around steak being expensive. Yeah, but
12:30
Speaker 4: when it was cooked on mass and you're giving me
12:33
Speaker 4: a slash start, it's not thirty eight dollars.
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Speaker 3: No, totally. Hey, maybe it was a steak.
12:36
Speaker 4: Maybe I was a steak. Oh no, girl, I know
12:38
Speaker 4: they charged that never twenty dollars.
12:40
Speaker 3: That's crazy.
12:41
Speaker 4: That's a good deal. That actually reminds me side note
12:43
Speaker 4: talking about a roast chook obviously expensive in those situations.
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Speaker 4: But one of the girls at work, Claudia, so she
12:51
Speaker 4: works in our office space and we talk all the time.
12:54
Speaker 4: She's always raving about the roast chook on Mondays at
12:57
Speaker 4: Chargirl Charlie's because you get a free large salad and
13:00
Speaker 4: their salads are bougie. Oh hell, and I think that's
13:03
Speaker 4: a good deal. Yeah. So anyway, if you're meaning to
13:06
Speaker 4: go on a Monday night to get a roast chalk
13:08
Speaker 4: from Chargirl Charlie's, because as much as a cols like
13:11
Speaker 4: Bachelor's Handbag is good, the ones from Chargirl charlie Is
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Speaker 4: just hit a lot better, like the proper chargrilled chicken
13:19
Speaker 4: like you can taste anyway, that's not sponsored Chargirl Charlie's.
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Speaker 4: You're welcome if you want to send a large chippies
13:25
Speaker 4: to our office. We're usually in on Tuesdays.
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Speaker 3: Thank you so much.
13:29
Speaker 5: And then this next one I did see. I personally
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Speaker 5: do not use chat GPT Blessed's blessed to anyone who does,
13:36
Speaker 5: but I just wanted.
13:36
Speaker 4: To share it away. She's judging you. No, no, no,
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Speaker 4: I'm by judging you. She's judging me, and that is fine.
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Speaker 4: That is fine.
13:45
Speaker 3: I just wanted to preface this.
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Speaker 5: But basically, someone pasted thirty days of grocery seats into
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Speaker 5: chat GPT and then asked it these six prompts. Basically,
13:54
Speaker 5: you're asking it to categorize every line and rank the
13:58
Speaker 5: five biggest money sinks. I guess I like, send this
14:00
Speaker 5: to you guys if you want.
14:02
Speaker 4: You also wouldn't make me feel personally attached.
14:05
Speaker 3: Oh you're gonna feel it.
14:06
Speaker 4: I feel like, girl, do you really need that many doritos?
14:09
Speaker 1: Yes?
14:10
Speaker 4: How much diet COKEI you buying?
14:12
Speaker 3: Don't come at me? What do you need that's actually essential?
14:15
Speaker 4: That's water?
14:16
Speaker 5: I really like those turtle chips. You know this sweet
14:18
Speaker 5: corn turtle chips. Anyway, I buy a lot of those,
14:20
Speaker 5: so you guys will get see them.
14:23
Speaker 3: There'ret coals, but maybe they're all words two, but please
14:26
Speaker 3: try them. They're really deliciously.
14:27
Speaker 5: I will I will not be submitting those into the
14:30
Speaker 5: tracker because I don't want it to tell me not
14:32
Speaker 5: to buy them, and then you'll ask it to then
14:34
Speaker 5: suggest lower cost alternative of the exact same like you know,
14:38
Speaker 5: nutrition taste, et cetera. So that might be like no
14:41
Speaker 5: name brand. You'll ask it to create like a five
14:43
Speaker 5: day dinner plan et cetera, et cetera, bulk buy list,
14:46
Speaker 5: and then a leftover remix chef which we've talked about before,
14:50
Speaker 5: just using things in your pantry, and then a price
14:52
Speaker 5: drop tracker. Is I think the main thing that I
14:54
Speaker 5: really wanted to get to. Sorry it took me so long,
14:56
Speaker 5: but you'll be asking it to like with those items,
14:59
Speaker 5: and especially the ones that are like you know, come
15:01
Speaker 5: up a lot track when the price is drop.
15:03
Speaker 3: I guess across the board.
15:05
Speaker 4: Are you ever going to use chat GPT?
15:09
Speaker 1: No?
15:10
Speaker 3: But I understand the benefits.
15:13
Speaker 4: I'm not trying to sell it to you, Oh I'm not.
15:16
Speaker 4: I'm just like, I feel like you've mentioned a few
15:18
Speaker 4: times the good ways to save money, and you're all
15:20
Speaker 4: about that, So I'm like, how slippery does the slope
15:23
Speaker 4: need to be for beck to use AI?
15:26
Speaker 3: That's such a good question.
15:28
Speaker 5: Honestly, I'm not that far off, but I think that
15:30
Speaker 5: I could probably do that myself really poorly, So I
15:33
Speaker 5: might just try and do that for them.
15:34
Speaker 3: I respect that you have that boundary. Thank you very morally.
15:37
Speaker 3: Good of you.
15:38
Speaker 4: Thank you so much.
15:38
Speaker 3: I don't have many boundaries. That's my one and only.
15:46
Speaker 4: Oh well, if you've got a clever saving hack, join
15:48
Speaker 4: that She's on the Money Facebook group and share it
15:51
Speaker 4: with us under the Becks Broke Tips thread, because I
15:54
Speaker 4: don't think many people know that you know about our
15:56
Speaker 4: money Wins and Confessions thread, but beck has her own thread.
15:59
Speaker 4: Every week people are dropping in their broke tips, and
16:02
Speaker 4: sometimes they are so rogue that I'm like, guys, we're
16:05
Speaker 4: gonna have to delete this because like that's illegal. But okay,
16:09
Speaker 4: now my friend's for this week's money dilemma, Well it's
16:12
Speaker 4: really your partner's money dilemma. But more on that.
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Speaker 3: After the break. Welcome back, everybody. Let's take a listen
16:20
Speaker 3: to this week's money dilemma.
16:24
Speaker 6: Hi.
16:24
Speaker 4: There, have you got a money dilemma you just can't solve?
16:27
Speaker 4: The She's on the Money team is here to help.
16:30
Speaker 6: Every week, we tackle your dilemmas, both big and small,
16:33
Speaker 6: to answer your most burning money, career and life questions.
16:36
Speaker 6: To get involved, simply head to our website and leave
16:39
Speaker 6: us a short voice recording and you might just find
16:41
Speaker 6: yourself on the show.
16:42
Speaker 4: Now, let's take a listen to this week's money dilemma.
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Speaker 7: Hey, gurlies, I have a dilemma where personal finances is amazing.
16:53
Speaker 7: I've got my emergency fund, I've got a treat with everything.
16:58
Speaker 7: Everything's very neat and organized. So I've just found out
17:01
Speaker 7: that my partner's business is in a bit of shambles.
17:05
Speaker 3: Essentially, he has put.
17:06
Speaker 7: His head in the dirt for the past two years
17:08
Speaker 7: and his business isn't about one hundred and sixty grand
17:12
Speaker 7: towards of debt. We do have funds in our account
17:16
Speaker 7: that we could transfer across, but that is our equity
17:19
Speaker 7: and we have plans on doing renovations. I just want
17:22
Speaker 7: to know, is it silly for me to put that
17:24
Speaker 7: money into the business to pay off those things. I
17:28
Speaker 7: don't know what to do. Would love some insights and recommendations. Thanks.
17:35
Speaker 4: Oh my goodness. What would you guys do if your
17:38
Speaker 4: partner's business had debt? Do you pay it off with
17:41
Speaker 4: personal funds?
17:43
Speaker 5: Ummm?
17:44
Speaker 3: I don't think so. I want to know, how like,
17:47
Speaker 3: how tangled you guys are.
17:49
Speaker 5: Not to say that you should separate, but to say, like,
17:51
Speaker 5: can you not worry about that can you worry about yourself? Basically,
17:54
Speaker 5: that's very stressful. That's a very stressful situation. I wouldn't
17:57
Speaker 5: put my own body in that. I would be like, Okay,
17:59
Speaker 5: this is your business and not my circus, not my monkey.
18:03
Speaker 5: But I know you want to support. I thin you
18:04
Speaker 5: can verbally, emotionally support, or anything you got to financially support.
18:09
Speaker 5: I don't know about the business side of things though.
18:10
Speaker 5: I don't know how you get back to zero. Maybe
18:12
Speaker 5: you're always in debt.
18:13
Speaker 4: I don't know.
18:14
Speaker 3: Is it normal?
18:15
Speaker 7: I don't know.
18:15
Speaker 2: I think it depends on how you guys approach finances,
18:18
Speaker 2: like do you share your finances.
18:19
Speaker 3: Fifty to fifty.
18:20
Speaker 2: Also worth keeping in mind is if you are married,
18:23
Speaker 2: there's the inherent assumption of the responsibility that you take
18:27
Speaker 2: on for people's hearing, your entitled half of what they earn.
18:31
Speaker 2: But then you know, the flip side of that is
18:33
Speaker 2: also you may potentially carry half of their debt, you know,
18:35
Speaker 2: if something bad were to happen. From how I understand it,
18:39
Speaker 2: I think that if you were to put the money in,
18:43
Speaker 2: it's with the look to strengthen your financial position as
18:47
Speaker 2: a couple. Again, I'm kind of assuming that if this
18:50
Speaker 2: is a consideration. You share finances, you've got these shared
18:53
Speaker 2: goals you're talking about. If that debt exists, it's going
18:56
Speaker 2: to loom over those things regardless. If you were to
18:59
Speaker 2: do this, though, I definitely would be looking at establishing
19:02
Speaker 2: some paperwork that outlines that you are either a shareholder
19:07
Speaker 2: in that company or you're entitled to a portion of it.
19:11
Speaker 2: Because if the business existed, and I'm assuming it did
19:14
Speaker 2: before you got together, because you obviously i'm guessing until
19:17
Speaker 2: this point haven't really had any oversight, then I think
19:21
Speaker 2: it is only fair that if you are to contribute
19:23
Speaker 2: that you are then also to get some of the profit.
19:25
Speaker 2: And I know that that sounds like very oh like,
19:28
Speaker 2: of course that's how it would work, But we're protecting
19:30
Speaker 2: assholes for the future, Yeah, is what I'm kind of
19:32
Speaker 2: thinking about. The flip side of that is, if you
19:35
Speaker 2: don't want to contribute to that, I guess it really
19:38
Speaker 2: becomes a bigger conversation about how you guys are managing
19:41
Speaker 2: finances currently, and we don't have that information, so it's
19:45
Speaker 2: very hard to say you're entitled to not want to contribute,
19:49
Speaker 2: But there are broader implications for your goals as a couple,
19:52
Speaker 2: I think is the thing that you ultimately have to consider.
19:55
Speaker 2: I think there's a big conversation that needs to be had, really.
19:58
Speaker 4: I just have questions about pre and pos, tax income,
20:01
Speaker 4: the business structure. Is it structured as a company. Is
20:03
Speaker 4: he a sole trader? How did he get in this
20:06
Speaker 4: debt one hundred and sixty thousand dollars? Has he gotten
20:10
Speaker 4: into that over the last five years because he hasn't
20:12
Speaker 4: done any of his tax returns, or has he gotten
20:15
Speaker 4: into it in one financial year? And you know the
20:18
Speaker 4: business is actually doing really well and has a lot
20:20
Speaker 4: of income coming in, do you know what I mean?
20:22
Speaker 4: There's just like so many questions I have. I would
20:25
Speaker 4: shy away from contributing personal funds to a business. I
20:29
Speaker 4: think it does a few things right. Set's a really
20:31
Speaker 4: bad precedent that you know, the business can't be self sufficient.
20:36
Speaker 4: And this is going to sound a little bit brutal,
20:38
Speaker 4: but if the business is not going to be successful,
20:40
Speaker 4: I think it's better to call it early than laid
20:43
Speaker 4: it down the track. Once you've like funneled in all
20:45
Speaker 4: of your personal income, if it's taxed specifically, you can
20:49
Speaker 4: call the ATO and organize a payment plan and the ato.
20:52
Speaker 4: I'm not going to say they're super reasonable, but they
20:55
Speaker 4: are pretty reasonable. Like the people that you call are
20:57
Speaker 4: just you know, people like you or I who have
20:59
Speaker 4: job and their job is to negotiate with you to
21:02
Speaker 4: get a settlement so that they do get paid back.
21:05
Speaker 4: And so they'll go, well, what are your costs? What
21:06
Speaker 4: could you afford per month over what period of time?
21:09
Speaker 4: And that's probably the route I go down before taking
21:12
Speaker 4: personal funds and paying off business funds because also those
21:16
Speaker 4: personal funds you would have paid your marginal tax rate
21:19
Speaker 4: on already. So if the business is going to pay
21:21
Speaker 4: its debt back, it should arguably do it with business revenue,
21:25
Speaker 4: not your personal income, because I'm assuming that you are
21:28
Speaker 4: also employed as a salary and PAYG employee, right, So
21:34
Speaker 4: I don't know, I just feel like there's a lot
21:36
Speaker 4: of question around it. But I would be very hesitant
21:40
Speaker 4: to pay back somebody else's business debt. I think it's
21:43
Speaker 4: a different story like if and I own businesses. But
21:47
Speaker 4: you know, over time, when I, you know, have been
21:50
Speaker 4: building shees on the money, I've tipped personal funds in
21:53
Speaker 4: not because we were in debt, but because I was like,
21:56
Speaker 4: we need to build a website, or I need to
21:57
Speaker 4: buy podcasting equipment, or a need to buy something the
22:00
Speaker 4: business can't yet afford. But for me, that was an
22:02
Speaker 4: investment into the business, so I looked at it as
22:05
Speaker 4: such and I kept track of it. And then once
22:08
Speaker 4: you know, the business was being profitable, I was like, okay, cool,
22:11
Speaker 4: the business ows me a thousand dollars because I bought
22:14
Speaker 4: this out of my personal income and it was always
22:17
Speaker 4: tracked as a debt. So if you're really like, okay, cool,
22:20
Speaker 4: but we want to wipe this s debt for some reason,
22:22
Speaker 4: like we don't want to payment plan with the ATO,
22:25
Speaker 4: we don't want X or Y or Z, I just go, well,
22:29
Speaker 4: if you are putting that money into the business, how
22:31
Speaker 4: are you keeping track of it, How is it being
22:32
Speaker 4: paid back? Is there an interest rate that's going to
22:35
Speaker 4: be applied to it? Because you're essentially investing into the business,
22:38
Speaker 4: and that probably makes it a little bit more complicated
22:41
Speaker 4: than your partner was expecting you to come back with.
22:44
Speaker 4: So yeah, you've just got to have some hard conversations.
22:48
Speaker 4: But I also think we need to be preserving our
22:50
Speaker 4: personal wealth and not contributing to somebody else's business where
22:53
Speaker 4: your name is not on that certificate and.
22:56
Speaker 2: Maybe speak to an accountant as well, because there's like
22:59
Speaker 2: the broader implication like you were saying around tax for yourself,
23:01
Speaker 2: tax for the business. Also, we're missing so much information
23:05
Speaker 2: right now to be able to give you any kind
23:07
Speaker 2: of guidance on what that looks like, whereas an accountant
23:10
Speaker 2: or another kind of professional can really deep dive through everything,
23:13
Speaker 2: classify those debts and maybe help give you a bit
23:16
Speaker 2: of a plan on what the best move forward potentially
23:18
Speaker 2: could be for you.
23:18
Speaker 7: Guys.
23:19
Speaker 4: Yeah, but that's a tricky one, and I think our
23:22
Speaker 4: overall consensus is maybe not the best idea to be
23:25
Speaker 4: paying off somebody's one hundred and sixty thousand dollars no
23:28
Speaker 4: business dere it. But also, oh my goodness, one hundred
23:31
Speaker 4: and sixty grand having access to that cash, go, why
23:33
Speaker 4: aren't we investing it? Why is it in cash? I've
23:35
Speaker 4: got questions.
23:36
Speaker 5: That's true.
23:37
Speaker 4: Now, that's the what are we doing? Like that cainn
23:39
Speaker 4: of verbs has been opened, So let's move on before
23:42
Speaker 4: I deep dive into that. We have a DM of
23:46
Speaker 4: the week. Every single week we ask you guys for
23:49
Speaker 4: your spicy money dilemmas so that we can hopefully group
23:52
Speaker 4: source and answer them, are you ready?
23:55
Speaker 6: Ready?
23:55
Speaker 4: Very?
23:56
Speaker 5: Hi?
23:56
Speaker 4: She she's on the money team. I've found out something
23:59
Speaker 4: about my partner's finances and I don't know what to
24:02
Speaker 4: do with it. We've been together for two years and
24:04
Speaker 4: we're talking about moving in together. I've always assumed that
24:07
Speaker 4: we were on a similar page with money, but recently
24:11
Speaker 4: I found out he has around forty thousand dollars in
24:13
Speaker 4: credit card debt and he's not mentioned it, not even once. Also,
24:18
Speaker 4: I only found out because I was being a bit
24:20
Speaker 4: nosy and I read a bank statement that he'd left around.
24:23
Speaker 4: And now I feel weird, like is this something that
24:27
Speaker 4: he should have told me? And if he didn't, what
24:29
Speaker 4: else don't I know? Am I meant to bring this
24:32
Speaker 4: up with him? Or is this not actually my business yet?
24:34
Speaker 4: Because we don't live together. I don't know if I'm overreacting,
24:37
Speaker 4: but it's really throwing me and I can't sleep. What
24:40
Speaker 4: are your thoughts?
24:42
Speaker 3: Oh, I'm sorry here, that's a really tricky one.
24:45
Speaker 5: I think, like your nosy gal, Yeah, no, I think
24:48
Speaker 5: like it probably feels multi layered because you're like, is
24:51
Speaker 5: this person lying to me?
24:53
Speaker 3: Is this person not kind of who I thought?
24:55
Speaker 5: But I honestly think like, as someone who is usually
24:57
Speaker 5: on the debt side of things, it can be really embarrassing.
25:01
Speaker 5: And if you know in your heart of hearts that
25:03
Speaker 5: this debt won't financially affect your partner, even if it
25:08
Speaker 5: does in some other kind of ways, like it bleeds
25:11
Speaker 5: out into like oh you can't go to dinner, you
25:14
Speaker 5: can't buy groceries, like it might spill out in other ways,
25:17
Speaker 5: but you know that in the long run it's not
25:19
Speaker 5: going to financially affect your partner, then you kind of
25:22
Speaker 5: you could just kind of not mention it if you
25:24
Speaker 5: don't need to. So I think like obviously communicating about that,
25:28
Speaker 5: like definitely bring it up and see what their explanation is,
25:32
Speaker 5: because it could just be like embarrassment, which is so fine.
25:34
Speaker 5: We also don't know if like maybe it was one
25:36
Speaker 5: hundred thousand and they've worked their way down to forty thousand.
25:39
Speaker 5: Maybe it was ten thousand and then they've worked their
25:41
Speaker 5: way up to forty thousand, which is like, Okay, this
25:44
Speaker 5: person is maybe not doing very well with their money.
25:46
Speaker 5: They're not really doing this in a way that will,
25:50
Speaker 5: I guess kind of like work in the future. So
25:52
Speaker 5: I think, yeah, there are some parts of the financial
25:56
Speaker 5: mentality that sometimes aren't compatible. I totally get that, but
26:02
Speaker 5: I think, yeah, just trying to figure out what happened
26:05
Speaker 5: to here. If they're like, oh, you don't need to know,
26:07
Speaker 5: but I'm not embarrassed about it. I just didn't want
26:08
Speaker 5: to tell you, then maybe they're hiding other things. But
26:10
Speaker 5: if they're like, no, I'm embarrassed anyone to tell you,
26:11
Speaker 5: but trust me on the top of it, that's fine.
26:13
Speaker 5: I think that's fine. He can say about assuming exactly
26:17
Speaker 5: makes an us out of you and me correct.
26:20
Speaker 2: And so I think there's a lot of assuming going
26:22
Speaker 2: on here. You assumed that you were on the same
26:23
Speaker 2: page financially, So technically he hasn't hidden anything.
26:26
Speaker 4: From you since you assumed.
26:29
Speaker 2: It's very different if you had point blank said to him,
26:30
Speaker 2: do you have debt and he had said no, true, No.
26:32
Speaker 2: Lying has occurred here, Like he might have assumed that
26:36
Speaker 2: it wasn't a big deal. He might have assumed that
26:39
Speaker 2: you have debt, Like I don't think it's fair to
26:41
Speaker 2: imply that because somebody has debt, they are a bad person,
26:45
Speaker 2: Like that's not the case. For all you know, he
26:48
Speaker 2: could have paid off his sick parents' medical bills. He
26:51
Speaker 2: could have had to take time away from work because
26:53
Speaker 2: of an injury, like he could have donated a lot
26:56
Speaker 2: of money to a charity, like you just buy his
26:58
Speaker 2: credit card. You totally don't know what has created that debt,
27:05
Speaker 2: and so I think, to look at it on paper,
27:07
Speaker 2: I understand it's a lot of money and it might
27:08
Speaker 2: be very shocking. But I think that jumping to conclusions
27:12
Speaker 2: is doing both of you with significant disservice. I think
27:14
Speaker 2: what you need to do is ask him about it.
27:16
Speaker 2: I think that's very reasonable, and your assessment of the
27:19
Speaker 2: situation needs to come from how that conversation goes. Is
27:22
Speaker 2: he open, is he secretive? How did he get in
27:24
Speaker 2: that debt? Was it a big debt that he's been
27:26
Speaker 2: paying down. Is it a small debt that has been
27:28
Speaker 2: increasing because he's gambling or buying stupid things. There's so
27:34
Speaker 2: many avenues that this could go down that you're not
27:36
Speaker 2: going to understand until you do have a conversation about it.
27:40
Speaker 3: I think that if you are on different pages financially,
27:44
Speaker 3: it can make things challenging.
27:45
Speaker 2: If, for example, you know, he goes, oh, it's just debt, whatever,
27:48
Speaker 2: It's fine, Like, I'm not stressed about it where you're
27:50
Speaker 2: somebody who has your ducks in a row and that's
27:53
Speaker 2: important to you, but there are ebbs and flows, there
27:57
Speaker 2: are ways around that if that's something that you want
27:59
Speaker 2: to do. But until you have all of the information,
28:02
Speaker 2: you can't make an informed decision. So it's about having
28:05
Speaker 2: a conversation and going into it gently, like not going,
28:08
Speaker 2: oh my god, you've hidden forty thousand dollars of debt
28:10
Speaker 2: for me, what is going on, but saying, hey, like
28:12
Speaker 2: I saw the bank statement on the table, I'm really
28:15
Speaker 2: surprised by the amount of.
28:16
Speaker 3: Money that was there, Like, what happened? What's your payment plan?
28:18
Speaker 2: I only ask because I see this as being a
28:21
Speaker 2: long term thing, and that means that that has the
28:23
Speaker 2: potential to impact me in our plans as partnership.
28:26
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, rough, I feel like this could have been me.
28:31
Speaker 4: So like when I met my now husband, I didn't
28:35
Speaker 4: tell him I was in debt because just like you, Beck,
28:37
Speaker 4: I was so deeply embarrassed by that that I hadn't
28:40
Speaker 4: told anybody, And like kind of feels like a bit
28:42
Speaker 4: of a personal attack this message, because like she's like, oh,
28:45
Speaker 4: I found out he was in forty thousand dollars worth
28:47
Speaker 4: credit card debt. I'm like, that's so much debt I
28:49
Speaker 4: was in, Like, and it wasn't because I didn't want
28:53
Speaker 4: to tell my partner. It was because I felt deeply
28:56
Speaker 4: embarrassed by it. And at that point in my life
28:59
Speaker 4: and this is not true, true just to caveat it.
29:01
Speaker 4: At that point in my life, I felt that that
29:04
Speaker 4: really defined me as being a failure of a human
29:07
Speaker 4: Like that was something I lied about, like actively. If
29:10
Speaker 4: my friends were like, oh, I don't have a credit card,
29:13
Speaker 4: I'd be like, yeah, neither, like, because I just felt
29:16
Speaker 4: like it reflected so poorly on my decision making for
29:19
Speaker 4: some reason, even though that wasn't the case at all,
29:22
Speaker 4: Like I just had never had the education and it
29:25
Speaker 4: spiraled out of control. And as I've said a million times,
29:28
Speaker 4: nobody goes in and gets a credit card with the
29:29
Speaker 4: hope of going into crippling debt. That's not something that
29:33
Speaker 4: we do. Nobody wants to be in a position where
29:35
Speaker 4: they're spending more than their earning.
29:37
Speaker 2: YEA.
29:38
Speaker 4: Like when it comes down to money values, I think
29:40
Speaker 4: we can all have the same value. I don't think
29:42
Speaker 4: anyone wants to be in crippling debt. So when they
29:45
Speaker 4: are there's probably a reason or a conversation that we
29:48
Speaker 4: need to be having. And personally, as someone who was there,
29:52
Speaker 4: I feel like I would like what you suggested, Jess,
29:56
Speaker 4: I think is really good. But I think that would
29:59
Speaker 4: have made me feel really defensive. I think if you'd
30:02
Speaker 4: come to me and found something that I'd accidentally left out,
30:04
Speaker 4: I would have been like, oh, like in my heart,
30:08
Speaker 4: I wouldn't be like, oh, you've done the wrong thing.
30:11
Speaker 4: I would just feel very off guard. I'd be like, oh,
30:15
Speaker 4: my goodness, like, oh my god, she knows, like, oh
30:17
Speaker 4: I wish i'd, like, you know, told her earlier or whatever.
30:20
Speaker 4: So if I was tackling this situation, I think I
30:24
Speaker 4: would be opening up the conversation not asking about that specifically,
30:28
Speaker 4: but going, oh my gosh, I'm so excited to move
30:30
Speaker 4: in together. We should get on the same page. Let's
30:32
Speaker 4: have a chat about budgets. Do you want to sit
30:33
Speaker 4: down and do a budget together? And like present opportunities
30:38
Speaker 4: where that could naturally come up, so that if we're
30:41
Speaker 4: sitting down going oh my god, I'm so bad at
30:43
Speaker 4: money that we really should do a budget. It could
30:45
Speaker 4: give you a partner the opportunity to be like, oh,
30:47
Speaker 4: my goodness, Yeah, I actually have a credit card and
30:51
Speaker 4: it's stressing me out or something. And then you can
30:53
Speaker 4: have this natural conversation. You don't have to mention that
30:55
Speaker 4: you were snooping, not because we're trying to hide the
30:57
Speaker 4: fact that we were snoops, but rather I feel like
31:02
Speaker 4: I would have felt really uncomfortable with them knowing before
31:05
Speaker 4: I had told them, If that makes any sense. It's
31:07
Speaker 4: not because I'm trying to hide something. I think it's
31:09
Speaker 4: just inherently human that i'd been burying, that i'd been
31:13
Speaker 4: hiding that like you to then go I see it,
31:17
Speaker 4: or I feel naked, I feel exposed, and I just
31:20
Speaker 4: I don't want people to feel that way when it
31:22
Speaker 4: comes to money. And if you can approach it gently,
31:25
Speaker 4: well maybe we could do that first. And then if
31:27
Speaker 4: that's not working, and you know, you go through this
31:29
Speaker 4: whole process of doing a budget together and they're along
31:31
Speaker 4: for the ride, you can be like, this is really
31:33
Speaker 4: all good. I saw that statement and open the can
31:36
Speaker 4: of worms. Then, but can we give them the opportunity
31:39
Speaker 4: to bring it up themselves in a way that they
31:41
Speaker 4: feel is comfortable.
31:43
Speaker 3: That's so fair?
31:44
Speaker 6: Is that?
31:44
Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, is the way to everybody else say.
31:47
Speaker 4: So, we asked the community, is this something a partner
31:50
Speaker 4: should disclose after two years together? Ninety four percent of
31:53
Speaker 4: you said yes, fairly so six percent said no. We
31:56
Speaker 4: then said, would forty thousand dollars in credit card debt
31:59
Speaker 4: be a deal breaker for you? Fifty six percent of
32:01
Speaker 4: you said yes, forty four percent of you said no.
32:05
Speaker 4: We then asked, at what stage in a relationship do
32:08
Speaker 4: you think finances should be openly shared. Fifty three percent
32:12
Speaker 4: said it really depends on the relationship, thirty eight percent
32:15
Speaker 4: said once you're exclusive, eight percent said from the very beginning,
32:20
Speaker 4: and one percent of you said marriage.
32:22
Speaker 3: Oh that's crazy. That's a hot take.
32:26
Speaker 4: Not gonna lie. That's crazy work from you guys. So
32:30
Speaker 4: then we said what's your two cents? First person said, well,
32:33
Speaker 4: it really depends what's his plan to resolve it. Another
32:36
Speaker 4: person said, if they live together, they should disclose it.
32:39
Speaker 4: If not, they're just dating and their whole life is
32:41
Speaker 4: not their business. Next person said, it's not a deal breakup,
32:45
Speaker 4: but it's also not my mess. Provide support and some strategy,
32:48
Speaker 4: but they do need to sort it out on their
32:50
Speaker 4: own fair Another person said, start an open conversation about
32:54
Speaker 4: your own financial goals and see if they buy in
32:57
Speaker 4: and open up to you, my queen. Another person said, oh,
33:02
Speaker 4: I had to be open from the beginning, and I
33:04
Speaker 4: found out that he had a million dollars and then
33:07
Speaker 4: in brackets sadly because his parents passed, but I had
33:11
Speaker 4: serio dollars. But we still financially contributed the same. But
33:14
Speaker 4: it was nice to feel like we were on the
33:15
Speaker 4: same page definitely. Another person said, why don't you start
33:19
Speaker 4: having money dates to discuss all things finance before you
33:22
Speaker 4: move in together, which I think is really cute. And
33:24
Speaker 4: another person said, bad finances cause a lot of stress
33:28
Speaker 4: in relationships and it hardly ends well. Just be open,
33:32
Speaker 4: very fair. There were also lots of comments that were
33:35
Speaker 4: similar to what we had discussed about him probably being embarrassed,
33:39
Speaker 4: and like, look out for the way that he's handling
33:41
Speaker 4: these conversations and maybe try and present opportunities for him
33:45
Speaker 4: to bring it up to you, which I don't know.
33:47
Speaker 4: I just feel like that's a kind way of approaching.
33:49
Speaker 4: It doesn't mean it's the right for you, because only
33:51
Speaker 4: you were going to know how your relationship works, and
33:54
Speaker 4: I mean your partner might just be aloof about money
33:57
Speaker 4: and you just go what was that and they go, oh,
33:59
Speaker 4: it's my credit card statement vipe. Yeah, And it's actually
34:02
Speaker 4: not that deep because sometimes when we talk about money,
34:05
Speaker 4: we overlay our own money stories onto how we feel
34:08
Speaker 4: about these things, and your partner could just be like, ah,
34:11
Speaker 4: is that a problem and you go, yeah, forty thousand
34:14
Speaker 4: dollars is a lot of money, and they go, oh,
34:15
Speaker 4: it's just how I live my life. Yeah, Like do
34:18
Speaker 4: you know what I mean? Like total, this could be
34:20
Speaker 4: a completely different money story, and you're overlaying how you
34:23
Speaker 4: feel about it and being catastrophic and then being like
34:26
Speaker 4: oh yollo, yeah, So I think opening it up in
34:30
Speaker 4: a kind way and then going from there is probably
34:32
Speaker 4: what's best.
34:33
Speaker 3: Very true. Could it be? The conversation is key exactly.
34:36
Speaker 4: And there you have it, the wrap that you get
34:38
Speaker 4: every single week from us, my friends. Thank you for
34:41
Speaker 4: joining us and being part of our wonderful little community.
34:44
Speaker 4: Whether you're tuning in from the gym, in the car,
34:46
Speaker 4: or in the office, we will see you bright and
34:47
Speaker 4: early on Monday morning for a brand new money Darry.
34:50
Speaker 4: Have a good weekend.
34:52
Speaker 3: Bye.
34:56
Speaker 6: The advice shed on Cheese on the Money is general
34:59
Speaker 6: in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's
35:03
Speaker 6: on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should
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Speaker 6: not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision.
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Speaker 6: If you do choose to buy a financial product, read
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Speaker 6: the PDS TMD and obtain appropriate financial.
35:15
Speaker 4: Advice tailored towards your needs.
35:17
Speaker 6: Victoria Divine and She's on the Money are authorized representatives
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Speaker 6: of money.
35:22
Speaker 4: Sheper Pty Ltd a BN three two one six four nine,
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Speaker 4: two
35:27
Speaker 6: Seven seven zero eight AFSL four five one two eight
35:31
Speaker 6: nine