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Real Estate Boundaries: How to Care for Clients Without Losing Yourself · The Real Estate Agent Playbook

• 0:00
  being relational doesn't mean being a doormat
• 0:03
  and as the market has changed
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  and stress levels have raised even more in
• 0:09
  around the home buying and selling process
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  we as agents have to set boundaries otherwise
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  caring for your clients could be your demise
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  today I'm gonna talk about a few ideas that I've had
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  and that I've coached my agents on
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  regarding how to just make sure that they're taking
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  care of themselves
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  setting the appropriate expectations
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  still providing a level service
• 0:34
  but not getting walked all over
• 0:42
  if you're interested in chatting with me
• 0:45
  if you've been feeling like
• 0:47
  you just don't have any more gas in the tank
• 0:51
  please reach out I would love to chat with you
• 0:54
  I would love to help you
• 0:55
  and if you're interested in my coaching
• 0:57
  and having access to me for absolutely free
• 1:00
  and partnering with myself
• 1:01
  as well as you know
• 1:03
  Mike Sherard Louis Gould at the Wolf Pack
• 1:05
  and getting all of their Social Agent
• 1:07
  Academy and predictable production coaching for free
• 1:11
  please reach out
• 1:13
  book a call in the link below but let's get into it
• 1:16
  so why do boundaries matter
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  and this is something that
• 1:19
  you know a lot of people
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  you know
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  post and since we're in this Google business page era
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  people say you know
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  we're available 24 7 and there's this hustle culture
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  you know don't stop
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  won't stop can't stop we're gonna keep doing this
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  we're gonna keep grinding
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  and this is something
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  that when we fail to set boundaries
• 1:39
  we fail to show up in the right way for our
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  our clients and the boundaries typically
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  once you have you know
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  have it set and you have that expectation conversation
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  most of the time
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  people respect you more in that instance than less
• 1:57
  and let's be real
• 1:58
  we're working with real life people on the other end
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  typically parents or non parents or
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  you know professionals that have
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  you know jobs and all the things
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  and they can relate to some of these boundaries
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  and a lot of you know
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  people will compare this to
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  you know you don't call your doctor at 9:30 at night
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  you know to ask a question right
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  uh granted there is emergency room
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  so you could probably go talk to a doctor
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  and that's a little bit different
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  but typically not much can happen
• 2:29
  as a real estate agent after 9:30 at night right
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  we can't do a closing we can't talk
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  get a lending question answered
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  we can't do a lot of those things
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  now also I'm
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  I'm always like hey
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  if you have you know
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  a leaking pipe
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  or you can't find your water shut off or whatever
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  reach out you know
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  I if I'm awake
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  I'll respond to your text message
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  that's a different story in an emergency case
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  and when we're setting boundaries
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  as clients kind of get to understand it
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  then they have more of an expectation
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  the truth is if we're setting boundaries
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  we have more organized communication
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  to educate them on the process
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  on what's coming next
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  often times when our boundaries do get pushed
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  it's because we as agents
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  have so much going on
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  that we forgot to have a conversation
• 3:15
  about what the inspection means or
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  you know they just received the inspection report
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  and they don't know what's next in the process
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  so they're going to call you and have a conversation
• 3:25
  most of the time
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  and myself included would pick up the phone
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  if I see a client that's under contract
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  calling me at 8:30 at night
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  you're gonna pick up the phone well
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  if I've had the conversation like hey
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  if I don't answer after 7 o'clock at night
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  or whatever that time is for you
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  I will definitely get back to you
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  you know right when I start working again
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  but I have two dot three daughters
• 3:44
  I have a wife I have all this stuff going on
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  so you know
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  I might be busy after hours times
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  if it's an emergency please shoot me a text
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  and I'll do everything I can to make sure
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  I'm checking that staying on top of it right
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  setting those boundaries as we go
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  but if they know what's coming
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  if the communication is coming
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  and they know the boundaries
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  then they don't need to have a question right
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  they don't need to freak out about the title commitment
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  because you told them it was coming
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  you told them it was confusing
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  and to pay special attention to the requirements
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  and the exceptions right
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  there's there's things that we can do ahead of time
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  prior to our clients receiving
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  you know
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  communication from other professionals within the
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  the process and as long as we tell them it's coming
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  yes some people don't read emails
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  yes
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  some people don't listen when you're talking to them
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  but if we're having these
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  and they're as part of our routine
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  and in our general conversation
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  then we will be able to uphold some of these boundaries
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  if they have been disclosed
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  a couple things that I touch on
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  when I'm talking to my clients
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  first and foremost what's the communication rhythm
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  hey
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  if your home is on the market and we receive an offer
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  I will certainly be in touch with you
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  regardless of what time it is
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  obviously I respect your boundaries and expectations
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  so I'll let you know when the deadline is
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  I will send it over I will review on my end
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  you can review on your end
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  and then before you sign anything
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  we can come together and have a conversation
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  so you're setting these expectations
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  OK say pre contract
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  listings are sitting on the market a little bit
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  hey Mister Seller
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  I'm gonna update you every single week
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  on anything that's occurred
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  if you don't hear from me
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  it's probably not a great
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  great thing but we haven't had any
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  you know showings or whatever
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  but we can talk about what
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  what the marketing has produced
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  and what the marketing will produce moving forward
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  and what kind of we're working on
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  this week you will also get a monthly market update
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  where we go deep dive into the updated comps
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  into the updated
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  you know market conditions and all of that
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  and you could do that weekly too
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  it just depends
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  I'm just throwing ideas out here for you to kind of
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  lay out the communication cadence
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  so your clients know what to expect
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  and then if they go beyond that like here's the deal
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  we have people that push boundaries
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  we have people that are friends
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  or family that we're working with
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  and sometimes they don't hear those things
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  or they don't think that they apply to them well
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  it's your responsibility to uphold those expectations
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  and communication promises
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  that you've made right
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  you don't have to respond
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  especially when you know
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  clients are upset or stressed out or saying hey
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  what are you gonna do now
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  or you're not doing this well enough
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  I promise you if you give it time to just simmer
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  things might be a little less intense or contentious
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  when you respond
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  and as we've moved forward into this market
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  if you haven't had the
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  chance to have a listing presentation
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  where you're brutally honest
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  where you're up front cause it used to be like
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  we could go in there and we could get away with it
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  and we could say yeah
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  we can try that and let's go for two weeks
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  and then we can lower the price
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  that's probably not the best route
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  today to list a property in
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  most markets may still be in yours
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  but if you're setting the boundaries
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  you're setting the tone and you know
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  and you're the market authority
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  they will appreciate that and respect that
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  as you move forward right
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  we don't like the conversations of like well
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  you should have priced it what I told you sorry
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  like now
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  now you're screwed like that's that's not okay
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  it's our job
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  to make sure that those expectations are clearly
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  delineated and that they understand
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  exactly what they're doing by overpricing their home
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  and what that could look like as we move forward
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  and in my case
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  I'm not really taking overpriced listings
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  because in my opinion
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  I would rather not have a listing sit there and expire
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  and then have somebody else come in and tell them
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  it's overpriced and they're like okay
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  well listen to you
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  even though Jeremy's put all this time and effort in
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  so
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  we have to make sure we're setting those expectations
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  we have to have both buyers and sellers
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  understand what the inspection looks like
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  understand what the appraisal looks like
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  and understand all of these things
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  but the main thing is understanding what the market
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  reality is and for me in my market right now
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  it's you know
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  the buyers feel like they have a little bit of power
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  so they're you know
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  kind of negotiating hard on the front end
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  you know but when we go under contract
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  and they are asking for next to everything
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  on the buy side you know
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  on the inspection so
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  you may want to
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  notify your clients and tell them it's coming
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  so that there is not as much
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  one trick that I use right here
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  is I show them what the buyer's
• 8:34
  you know monthly payment might be based on you know
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  the contract price and what's going on
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  I say well they're paying
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  45 hundred dollars a month for this property
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  so that 50 year old furnace might have to go right
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  that might be something that they're gonna ask
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  even though it's working fine
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  even though it heats up the property just great
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  I'm just telling you this is what they're paying
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  they can't afford for that to go out
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  two months in to their to their ownership
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  so the clearer expectations you do
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  the less surprises and the more smoother a transaction
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  meaning that even if they don't get their price or
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  you know
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  even if you maybe they're mad at the buyer or whatever
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  you still have the opportunity to be their go to
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  referral real estate agent
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  as well as receive maybe a five star review
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  those testimonials really matter
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  they really carry weight these days
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  and so that's super important
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  next as a word of advice
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  understand all of the things that are going on
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  one of my favorite questions to ask a buyer
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  you know obviously is where they're going
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  but a seller specifically
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  where are you going from here right
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  and this has me under
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  helps me ha understand what they're looking to do right
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  why they've done it typically
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  I know my clients
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  so I kind of know a little bit about that
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  but if I don't
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  figuring that out and understanding their why to
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  why they're putting their house on the market
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  allows me to pour into that
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  is it an empathetic thing
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  I'm gonna listen to them
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  I'm gonna listen to exactly what they want
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  what they need what they want
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  how they want their property marketed
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  what they their expectations are of this home sale
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  and I don't control the market
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  but I control a lot of other things
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  and I control a lot of
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  the other part of their experience
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  through communication expectation
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  how I market the property
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  which for me starts with
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  what do you love about living here
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  what's your favorite parts about living in this area
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  what's your favorite restaurants
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  what's your favorite place to you know get your haircut
• 10:29
  whatever it is I wanna make sure that I am capturing
• 10:32
  all of those favorite things that they had
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  you know
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  whether it's in a video whether it's in you know
• 10:38
  the description of the property or anything like that
• 10:41
  I wanna make it so that they feel heard right
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  I don't want them to call me and be like hey
• 10:47
  did you put that we have the best you know
• 10:50
  Chinese restaurant just a you know
• 10:52
  stone's throw away we can walk there on Friday nights
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  at the best happy hour whatever like
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  I wanna make sure that whatever they're telling me
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  is put out into the marketing
• 11:03
  as subtly as it can be
• 11:05
  but it's there and I promise you
• 11:07
  this will make your life a lot easier
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  because the reason that they're telling you that
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  is because they think that's a selling point
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  and yes
• 11:14
  there has to be expectations around selling points
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  and we don't have to go down that rabbit hole
• 11:19
  but the more you listen
• 11:20
  the more you can hear what exactly their expectations
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  are and you can knock it out of the park every time
• 11:27
  and it will make it a much smoother transaction
• 11:30
  no matter what the market's doing
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  the next piece is
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  there is going to be bumps in the road
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  there was bumps in the road
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  when the market was a little bit easier
• 11:37
  and there's gonna be things that go wrong
• 11:40
  and what I have you know
• 11:43
  really leaned on especially in this you know
• 11:46
  crazy shift that we've seen from sellers having
• 11:50
  30 offers 30 showings
• 11:52
  13 offers whatever to you know
• 11:55
  if we get three showings in a week
• 11:57
  we're happy what I've really leaned into is like
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  okay yep
• 12:01
  it's my fault what what do we need to do here right
• 12:04
  if you take accountability for it
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  because you are in charge of marketing the property
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  and getting it in front of as many people as possible
• 12:11
  if you just defuse a high
• 12:12
  contentious situation by saying yep
• 12:14
  it's my fault this is what we're doing
• 12:16
  this is what we're acting
• 12:17
  maybe I didn't explain that properly to you or maybe
• 12:20
  you know we miss that because we went this way
• 12:23
  whatever it is you don't have to make an excuse
• 12:25
  but if you say it's my fault
• 12:26
  you're gonna diffuse the situation almost immediately
• 12:29
  and as you work through it
• 12:31
  it doesn't have to be your fault
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  but just by you saying it
• 12:34
  will lead to a more productive conversation
• 12:36
  in a less amount of time
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  so that you can get to the to the roots of it
• 12:41
  to the crux of it
• 12:42
  what do they want as far as what's going on
• 12:45
  yes you're the expert
• 12:46
  you are the real estate expert
• 12:48
  but if you are not educating them
• 12:50
  and explaining and showing what your
• 12:52
  the marketing looks like
• 12:53
  and having them feel a part of that story
• 12:56
  then they're going to come to you with complaints
• 12:59
  if things don't go perfectly smooth
• 13:01
  and they don't get multiple offers
• 13:02
  in the first weekend so
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  it's my fault
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  is one of the most powerful things you can do
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  although it's hard sometimes you say
• 13:11
  but I'm telling you right now
• 13:12
  a client who's paying you you know
• 13:14
  10 20
• 13:14
  thirty thousand dollars to sell their house
• 13:16
  doesn't want to have an argument
• 13:18
  they just want to get to the results
• 13:21
  and if some they're you know
• 13:24
  uneducated or uninformed or whatever the truth is
• 13:27
  it is my fault so I will take that on
• 13:29
  so if you can just defuse situations
• 13:32
  it's my fault and leave out the butt uh
• 13:35
  I think we'll be in in good shape there as we go
• 13:39
  the next piece is self care
• 13:40
  how you think about yourself
• 13:42
  and how you feel about yourself
• 13:44
  is exactly how your clients will pick up and treat you
• 13:48
  so if you're not taking care of yourself
• 13:50
  if you're
• 13:51
  you know in toxic relationships if you're you know
• 13:53
  always stressed out and always this or always that
• 13:57
  like your clients are gonna treat you that same way
• 13:59
  because it's it's a basic human piece of psychology
• 14:02
  they're gonna treat you how you expect to be treated
• 14:05
  and if you're treating yourself that way
• 14:07
  that's a problem so always have the opportunity
• 14:10
  get outside take a walk drink water
• 14:13
  eat healthy do those things
• 14:15
  so that you are firing on all cylinders
• 14:17
  so that you are taking care of yourself
• 14:19
  so your clients also feel the need to take care of you
• 14:23
  or show you the respect that you deserve ultimately
• 14:26
  boundaries in your personal life
• 14:27
  lead to respect in your professional life
• 14:30
  which will also
• 14:31
  include boundaries in the professional side
• 14:33
  and currently I
• 14:34
  have all kinds of crazy
• 14:36
  stories about what's going on with some of my deals
• 14:39
  but I'll tell you this one
• 14:41
  because I think we're close to being wrapped up
• 14:43
  I had a client who received
• 14:46
  you know opening weekend
• 14:48
  we had somebody who was like hey
• 14:50
  we're ready to make an offer
• 14:51
  but our house just you know
• 14:52
  has been on the market for a week or two
• 14:54
  once we have an offer we're in
• 14:56
  they followed up for me for two or three weeks
• 14:59
  you know even to the point where I was like
• 15:00
  you guys can probably submit an offer
• 15:02
  and we'll look at it right
• 15:03
  as we we kind of went down
• 15:05
  that's when we were listed at 6:50 right
• 15:07
  this was above you know
• 15:09
  what I suggested but it had a really amazing backyard
• 15:12
  and a lot of cool things going for it
• 15:14
  and these buyers kind of fell in love
• 15:16
  well that
• 15:17
  those talks kind of faded away
• 15:19
  I reached out and I said hey
• 15:21
  you know I saw that your property went under contract
• 15:23
  like are we still on here
• 15:25
  turns out they went saw one other one
• 15:26
  she's like they're deciding between yours and that one
• 15:28
  I was like great
• 15:29
  set another showing they never did
• 15:31
  they ended up purchasing the other one
• 15:33
  and we had to lower the price a little bit
• 15:35
  got another person interested
• 15:37
  they hadn't put their home on the market
• 15:39
  and I was like guys like this
• 15:41
  is how the market's kind of trending
• 15:43
  like we probably
• 15:44
  want to have some skin in the game from them
• 15:46
  if we're gonna sit off the market
• 15:48
  before their house is even on the market
• 15:50
  so we countered pretty strongly
• 15:52
  that one didn't end up coming to fruition
• 15:54
  then we lowered the price
• 15:56
  got a an offer pretty quickly
• 15:58
  you know this
• 15:59
  this person worked for the real estate professional
• 16:02
  who had done a lot of deals
• 16:03
  and you know
• 16:04
  he told me she's amazing she understands the process
• 16:07
  she's gonna be really easy to work with
• 16:09
  turns out
• 16:10
  she got cold feet when she saw the loan estimate right
• 16:13
  so that's another one
• 16:14
  so we went on the off the market with her and back on
• 16:17
  back on shortly thereafter
• 16:19
  you know then we go under contract again
• 16:22
  and this is when we get you know
• 16:24
  the laundry list of inspection items
• 16:26
  not to mention the first time before that person
• 16:29
  you know went out and you know
• 16:31
  decided they couldn't afford the property
• 16:34
  based on the loan
• 16:35
  my clients went and retired with the city
• 16:37
  cause they were gonna move
• 16:38
  they are moving to Wisconsin
• 16:39
  and they were gonna close on that house
• 16:41
  and they're like okay
• 16:42
  well
• 16:42
  that's two weeks away we're gonna retire here well
• 16:45
  between the time they both retired and quit their jobs
• 16:47
  the house you know
• 16:49
  was back on the market
• 16:50
  so that was something certainly my fault
• 16:52
  I said you know
• 16:53
  let's wait for inspection at some point in the process
• 16:56
  but I didn't make it relevantly clear right then
• 16:59
  you know to them
• 17:00
  absolutely my fault turns out it all worked out
• 17:03
  so we're back on the market
• 17:05
  we go back under contract
• 17:06
  then we get a laundry list of inspection items
• 17:09
  and this house was is decently taken care of
• 17:12
  there's a lot of good things about the house
• 17:14
  but we got a laundry list of inspection items great
• 17:18
  they're gonna do it all they're just done with it right
• 17:20
  they've been through the ringer a little bit here
• 17:22
  they need to close on the other house and you know
• 17:25
  one of the repairs was a sewer line well
• 17:27
  the sewer company you know hired in the um
• 17:32
  you know locate company the locate company locates
• 17:35
  you know public utilities
• 17:36
  but not private utilities
• 17:38
  but no one told anyone that this was happening
• 17:40
  and oddly enough the electrical meter is at the street
• 17:44
  in this municipality so what happens
• 17:48
  they sever the main power line right
• 17:51
  so here we are no power sewer
• 17:54
  you know dug up
• 17:55
  whole yard looks like a war zone
• 17:57
  and we have to get the an electrician out there
• 17:59
  and the sewer quote doesn't cover the
• 18:02
  the electrical because it's a private utility and
• 18:05
  you know we've worked that out with the sewer company
• 18:07
  but as you can see
• 18:08
  these are a ton of things that are going on however
• 18:12
  throughout the process has my client gotten stressed
• 18:15
  has my client been short with me
• 18:17
  has my client even called me a name once
• 18:19
  yes but what they continue to tell me is
• 18:22
  they appreciate me so much
• 18:25
  I appreciate everything I'm doing
• 18:27
  because of my communication
• 18:28
  because I understand
• 18:30
  it's a high level stress situation
• 18:32
  and I have thick skin like
• 18:33
  when they call me a name
• 18:35
  or when they are stressed out or they're short with me
• 18:37
  I don't take it personally because I'm like
• 18:39
  here it is like I understand all you're going through
• 18:41
  this is how I'm gonna help you get through it
• 18:43
  my goal is to get you to the other end happy
• 18:46
  and I have no doubt that that
• 18:48
  that client will provide me a positive testimonial
• 18:51
  because of all we've been through together
• 18:53
  not on opposing sides but together
• 18:55
  and so I think that's a huge lesson is I could have
• 18:59
  you know threw up my hands and been frustrated
• 19:01
  and all the things but I stuck with them
• 19:03
  I stuck with the conversations then I you know
• 19:06
  made it abundantly clear
• 19:07
  that we were going to get through this
• 19:09
  no matter what I had to do
• 19:10
  so as an agent in this market that is difficult
• 19:15
  or if your market seems less difficult than mine
• 19:18
  right now it's coming right
• 19:20
  so understand that
• 19:22
  you are going to be up against some
• 19:23
  stressful situations and at the end of the day
• 19:27
  setting your boundaries
• 19:28
  having those expectations taking care of yourself
• 19:32
  absolutely 100% and also
• 19:35
  you know
• 19:36
  just sticking with the client and just communicating
• 19:39
  and just doing everything in your power
• 19:41
  to make it right for them
• 19:43
  will take your business a long way
• 19:45
  if you have any questions
• 19:46
  if you're interested in getting my client journey
• 19:48
  absolutely for free through my course
• 19:50
  you can look at partnering with me
• 19:52
  you can also reach out
• 19:53
  we have a real estate agent game plan call
• 19:55
  let's have a conversation
• 19:57
  and let's take your business to the next level
• 19:59
  remember we're all in this together
• 20:01
  if you need someone to vent to
• 20:03
  that's probably my No. 1 value add to
• 20:05
  to my organization is hey
• 20:07
  let's just vent let's figure it out
• 20:09
  we'll see you next time like comment
• 20:10
  subscribe
• 20:11
  and don't miss my conversation with just Robert
• 20:15
  coming out on Friday it's absolutely incredible
• 20:18
  the amount of care that this
• 20:20
  woman gives to her clients
• 20:22
  she will close over 100 transactions this year
• 20:24
  by herself absolutely incredible interview
• 20:27
  I can't wait to share it with you
• 20:28
  but make sure you see it on Friday
• 20:30
  we'll talk to you soon