Latest / Overwhelmed Working Woman: Boost Productivity, Master Time Management, Overcome Overwhelm & Stop People Pleasing / #84| Is Overwhelm the Real Reason You Can’t Relax?

Transcript

#84| Is Overwhelm the Real Reason You Can’t Relax? · Overwhelmed Working Woman: Boost Productivity, Master Time Management, Overcome Overwhelm & Stop People Pleasing

• 0:18
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for joining us.
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: That today's working woman experiences, and in each episode you'll get a strategy to bring more calm, ease and relaxation to your life.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: Hey friend, welcome back to Quick Hit Thursday.
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for joining today.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: I'm going to be answering a question from a listener.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: If you are a person who has a question for me, I would love if you would click the send me a text button in the show notes and send me a text with what your question is.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: I've said this on here before, but I can't respond to those texts.
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: It doesn't track where it came from.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: So send me your question and know that I'm like hey, thanks for the question.
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: I'll try to address that one, even though you won't actually get a response from me.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: Okay, you'll hear it on the podcast.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: That's how you'll know I got it.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: So let's start off with the question for today, which is I feel like I have to be productive at all times.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: I feel that I get it when I rest or do something for me.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: It always feels like I should be doing something else.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: Raise your hand, if you can relate to that, amen.
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: And then the problem is when you're resting quote, unquote resting and you feel like you should be doing something productive.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: It's not even restful.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: It's so annoying.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: I just hate when that happens.
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: So let's talk about that.
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: The first thing to do is just to notice your beliefs around, rest, self-care, doing things for you, and by noticing your beliefs.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: If you don't know what your beliefs about it are, start by saying like, what did I learn in my household where I grew up, and when you start to notice your beliefs?
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: So, for example, in my family my dad went to work every day.
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: I knew he was a hard worker.
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: When he came home he was much more likely to relax than my mom.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: My mom was a stay-at-home mom.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: My mom is, was and is a really hard worker.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: So I didn't see her rest a lot.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: I can't remember her resting our entire childhood.
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: I'm sure she did, but I have no memories of it.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: It's probably why she always likes to take naps now.
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: But she did get a babysitter for times when she would go running.
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: She always worked out.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: She played racquetball, she took a bath every night.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: So my beliefs that were modeled to me were that hard work is really important, but so is taking care of yourself, like my mom always took very good care of herself.
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: But for me, resting, just doing nothing, is difficult, especially because I have a story or a belief that when you have kids, there's always something to do, and we know that's true.
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: We all know that's true.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: So in your case, just think about it for you, without judgment.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: Just think about how you were raised and what kinds of beliefs you developed from that, and that will help to inform you about why you're probably thinking about rest and self-care in the way that you are.
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: So the good news is, once you know what these beliefs are, you can start to change them.
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: So, for example, you could start by thinking new thoughts like rest isn't a reward, it's a necessity.
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: You need to be productive, yes, but rest is essential to being productive.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: Or I can be productive and also take care of myself all in the same day.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: And once you start to embrace those kinds of ideas and start taking actions from those thoughts, you can gently shift yourself from I can never rest or take care of myself, or I should be doing something productive, to just a different thought and the idea that you can be productive and rest all on the same day.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: Now let's think about the productivity side of this.
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: I'm guessing, if you're listening to this podcast, that you don't have trouble working hard and being productive.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: Sometimes it feels so comfortable to be productive and work hard and I don't mean comfortable like it's easy.
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: It's familiar more than comfortable.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: I should probably say familiar instead of comfortable that it's almost easier just to keep working because you know how that feels and it's a familiar feeling.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: So I invite you to do the same thing about productivity as you did about rest and just think about what works best for me in terms of productivity.
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: So what I found about myself when I had a corporate job, I worked, you know, eight to six, seven, whatever time.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: Before I had kids, I would just work as late as I wanted.
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: But after I had kids I would quit and then go back to work later and often I would have I mean easily nine conference calls in one day, sometimes even more than that, where I would like join one for a half hour and then join another one and I could be really productive quote unquote for a long, extended period of time.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: But now that I'm in the position because I put myself in the position, by the way, this was not luck Now that I'm in the position to have a different kind of job.
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: I can ask myself what's my productivity sweet spot, and I'll tell you what it is, because I've had to work to figure this out.
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: For me it's like 90 minute shifts and for me, doing that sitting down and, for example, recording podcasts or writing things or doing marketing posts the things that I need to do for my business I find that I can concentrate and be really productive for like 90 minutes.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: And then I need to do for my business.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: I find that I can concentrate and be really productive for like 90 minutes, and then I need a break and I need to go rest my mind and do something else.
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: Sometimes I'll just go lie on my couch and read a book, sometimes I'll meditate, sometimes I'll go for a walk around the block, whatever.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: But for me, a girl who used to work, you know, 10 hours straight, no problem.
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: What I've learned is it feels a lot better to me to do those 90 minute focus shifts.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: I've also learned that seeing six clients in a row isn't something that works best for me.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: It's much better for me to see four clients or, if I see five clients, to have a space of an hour in between there so I can get myself some lunch and take a little rest and get some water, etc.
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: So think about that for you.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: And if you're thinking, yeah, this is not my ideal productivity, but it's the kind of job I have and I have no choice, question that as well.
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: You always have a choice.
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: You can always think about things in a different way.
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: You can do small things, start with the smallest of steps to say you know what, today I'm not going to attend that call, that I really don't need to attend anyway and all I do is answer my emails when I'm on that call and I really don't need to be there.
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: Think about that.
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: Think about leaving work 10 minutes earlier than you normally leave.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: Just think about little, tiny steps that you can take to move towards your ideal productivity and your ideal rest.
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: This is absolutely something that I help my clients with.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: So if you need more help on this, you can keep listening to the podcast.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: You can reach out to me and set up a consultation.
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: This is my sweet spot.
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: Okay, thanks for tuning in to Quick Hit Thursday.
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: Send me a text, which the link is in the show notes, if you have a question you'd like me to address, and I will see you soon.
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: Thank you for listening to the Overwhelmed Working Woman podcast.
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: If you want to learn more about my work, head over to my website at michellegothiercom.
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: See you next week.