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Transcript

Ghost Stories & Embarrassing Boyfriends · Blush

0:00
Hello and welcome to Blush, the world's first Wellness show
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that's actually entertaining. I'm Heva and I quit law so I can
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help you look and feel your best.
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Together we got into food, nutrition, all the latest
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Wellness trends, but we also laugh, get silly, drop a few F
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OPS and go on a million tangents.
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So if that sounds like your vibe, we're about to be best
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friends. Hi, hi, hi.
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Oh my God, I'm so fucking excited to be here and so
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fucking excited to be recording. No, I am sick, as is my little
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Co host here, but we both decided to show up to work like
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the consummate professionals that we are.
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Now. She is drinking on the job.
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So some of us are a little more professional than others, but
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that's neither here nor there. And if you're not watching on
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video, I'm referring to Sam as this toy.
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Also, if you're not watching on video, all the times that I
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refer to the Co host, I'm talking about Samantha, my dog.
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So she's hero. Sometimes you're really, you're
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missing out a lot if you're not not watching on video.
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But that's your journey. And I really, as much as I will
1:02
give you shit for it every single week, I am you.
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I don't really watch any podcasts.
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I exclusively listen. So I get it.
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Like I literally am you. I don't know why I'm mouthing
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off over here. Anyway, so she has this little
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stuffed animal toy that looks like a modello, like the beer,
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but it says dog Aloe. It's so fucking funny and she's
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snuggling with it all podcasting and she's a little shaky.
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I think she doesn't feel great. And honestly, I wasn't gonna
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bring her in here. There were a lot of
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configurations of this I was gonna do.
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My first option was to do it while I'm healthy, but that
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option did not present itself to me.
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So here we are. I I've been sick more times this
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year that I think I've been like in the entire past 15 years of
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my life. There is something going on with
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like my sinus actually. OK, you know what?
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Can I just explain exactly what keeps happening to me?
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And I want to know if you can relate to this.
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Please, for the love of God, contact me.
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I don't care how you contact me. DM me, e-mail me.
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I mean, those are kind of the predominant options, but like,
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look me up in the white pages doesn't show up at my fucking
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door. OK, I don't care.
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We need to talk If this if you have heard of anything like
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this. So I keep saying it's my
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sinuses, but I don't even I don't know, I don't maybe this
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is my sinuses. I don't actually know where my
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problem area is. Is right above my soft palate.
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So if you're not familiar with that concept, you know the roof
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of your mouth, right? I'm running my tongue along it.
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OK, so the front, front parts of it are harder.
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That's kind of like I was going to say it feels like you have
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teeth above there, but I don't, I don't.
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That's not where that's literally not where your teeth
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are. It's behind your teeth, but like
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it's harder. Like right behind your teeth,
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that part of the roof of your mouth is harder.
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And then if you like, keep running your tongue along the
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roof of your mouth back towards your throat.
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I love how I'm explaining what a soft palate is.
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I think everyone listening is like, bitch, we know.
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Like you're the one who doesn't know the meaning to words we
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know. Nevertheless, I'm going to get
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into it just in case. So if you keep running your
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tongue back towards your throat on the roof of your mouth, it
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then gets softer and like spongy.
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Kind of right above there is my problem area.
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I don't know what kind of demon is hanging out up there causing
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ruckus, but something is wrong up there.
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I don't know what that is because it's not.
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I'm not so congested in my nose. I get a little post nasal drip
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which is coming from that area and the symptoms are slightly
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different every time. This time I have extreme
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pressure, like my head hurts, my hair hurts, like my, the tops of
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my teeth hurt, like that's how much pressure there is.
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But I've had various versions of this so many times this year and
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I don't fucking know what it is. I get extreme brain fog.
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I get extremely rundown, but not like so rundown that it's like,
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oh, I have the flu. Like it's kind of our type of
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rundown where you could operate at that level.
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But The thing is like, I'm not 100% and I just, I've, I feel
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like I've been fighting through this brain fog like pretty much
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all year. Like anyway, whatever, it
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doesn't matter. That's neither here nor there.
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So yes, Sam's here, I'm here, we're present, we're ready to
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go. It's the second Tuesday of the
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month. We're doing hot or not, we have
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some fun trends. Before we talk about that, we do
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have to talk about the fact that I'm pretty sure we have a ghost
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in the apartment. There have been several little
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ghost sightings, if we want to call it that.
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Number one, actually, I can't remember the first thing that
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happened. I do remember there was one
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thing that happened that I was like, that's odd.
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And it, it just wasn't enough to like really.
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But I do remember being like, I don't, it was something like I
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misplaced something and then the next day it was in the right
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place and I was like, but I know I didn't put it back in its
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right place. How did it get here?
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But you know, sometimes you do things and you forget that
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you've done them right? So that that in and of itself
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wasn't much for me. Then the next thing that
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happened was I and I I OK, so we have two fridges right now.
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It's a whole thing. I'm really hoping the landlord
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just has forgotten and doesn't come to get the second fridge.
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Because let me tell you what a privilege 2 fridges are.
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Like if you haven't lived the two fridge lifestyle and you're
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kind of like a hungry type of girly, oof, 2 fridges will
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change your fucking life anyway. So one of the fridges, one of
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the shelves in it keeps falling. Like one side just falls.
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Like it falls. I I think you know what falling
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means. OK, so we don't have to do a
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repeat of soft pallet gate, right?
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So one side of it keeps falling. I don't know how to fix it.
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Ozzy fixes it every time. And so he was out of town for a
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few weeks and it had fallen and I kept trying to fix it.
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I don't know how to fix it. So finally was like fuck it,
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I'll I'll just put something tall like a tall jar underneath
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that side so it doesn't entirely fall down.
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And then one day I'm in the middle of sending my friends a
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voice memo, which is why it was so why I remember it so crystal
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clearly. I go in the fridge to grab
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something and the shelf is perfect.
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And the thing that it was leaning on wasn't even there
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anymore. Was move to the side and I keep
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looking at it and I'm like, did I fix this?
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Because I don't think I did. In fact, I know I'm not capable
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of fixing it. I know because I've tried many
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times and it continues to not get fixed.
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So whatever. I thought that was weird, but
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again, I don't know, maybe my hand hit it and it fixed itself.
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You know, like there are explaining everything that I'm
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going to say. There are, I think, potentially
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reasonable explanations for every single one of them.
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They're just fucking weird is all.
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So that was one thing. And I go, huh, is there like a
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helpful ghost in the house? Because there was something else
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that was fixed for me recently and I feel like I didn't do that
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one either. Now, the real kicker for me was
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this incident that happened a couple weeks later.
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Ozzy was back. So this was during Oh my God.
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OK, this was during my my super social week, the Halloween week,
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which by the way, I ended up missing the last two things.
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But in all fairness, it's because I got sick, which is
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what happens to me when I'm pushed to socialize too much.
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Anyway, So the second thing of that week that I had to go to
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that day, I was really bloated and not to be gross, but I was
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like gassy bloated. And so I was trying to find, I
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have different types of blow pills for different things, but
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this one specifically the Hilma ones, I think they're really
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great for gas. They have peppermint oil in them
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and I think that that works so quickly for gas.
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So I, you know, kind of painful trapped gas.
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And I kept trying to find those pills.
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I could not find them and I was kind of running out of time and
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I really had to run and get ready and I was just flustered
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and overwhelmed. And so Ozzie's like, OK, you go
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get ready. I'll try to find the bloat
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pills. And I go, OK, great.
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They're in a green kind of mint green colored bottle with a
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white cap. The brand is called Hilma, blah,
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blah, blah, blah, blah. There's one drawer, it's a kind
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of like a spice drawer, like a thinner drawer with three levels
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that we keep all our supplements in, or most of our supplements
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in, I should say. And so I said, you know, it's
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got to be somewhere in there, blah, blah, blah.
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But if you can't find them, maybe we're just out.
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So I'm in the back, you know, doing my skin care, pulling my
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hair into a type bond, you know how she does, jelling my
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eyebrows, yada, yada, yada. By the way, wait, by the way.
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OK, quick quick tangent within this story.
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Oh my God. So I have started posting the
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episodes on YouTube. They don't get hardly any views
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at all on YouTube. So I was uploading I think last
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week's Blush Kitchen or something and I saw that one of
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the recent episodes had a couple of comments, which like I said,
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they don't really get any views. So they don't really got any
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comments. So I clicked to see what the
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comments were and, and the first one had it said there was a time
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code and it said thank you. And there was some emoji which I
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kind of glossed over. And the second one had another
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time code and it said, yeah, that really did it for me.
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And so I click on the time code because I'm thinking, Oh my God,
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what did I say that helped this person so much?
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Oh my God, it really did it for them.
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Like, how exciting is that? You know, I must have said
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something really profound and interesting.
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Interesting. So I click on the time code and
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I get there and I'm kind of, I don't remember what I was
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saying, but whatever it was, I didn't think it was that
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interesting or were found or deep at all.
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And I keep watching it and then rewatching it and rewatching it
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and I'm like, I have not one iota of a clue.
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And then I go to the first comment and I click on that time
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stamp and I'm like, wait, what is this person thinking me for?
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And then I look at the emoji and it's the feet emoji.
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And then I go back to that first time stamp.
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And at the first time stamp, exactly at that moment, I put my
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foot on the screen. And then I went back to the
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second time stamp. And in the second time stamp,
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I'm actually demoing what I was doing there.
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I was just kind of playing with my big toe a little bit.
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I didn't have socks on or some person.
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I was just in a massaging my big toe.
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It honestly felt really good for me and apparently it really did
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something for this person. So to that person, I'd like to
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say you're welcome. I'm happy to sell you feet
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pictures if you want to pay me, you know, six to seven.
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You know, I, my feet have a very big ego.
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What can I say? One timer is on a yacht.
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I actually hold on. I don't know that it was a
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yacht. If I've ever been on a yacht,
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that was it. I guess I'm not entirely sure
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what is what. Like what makes a boat a yacht?
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What characteristics push a boat into yacht versus just being a
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regular boat? By the way, we are going to go
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back to the ghost story. Don't forget.
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That's become my entire personality.
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I will. I mean not don't forget.
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I won't forget you. Don't worry, we will look out to
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the ghost story. I was on this boat, basically.
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Very Long story short, I'm not going to make it short.
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I'll try to make it as distinct as I can.
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One of my best friends was dating this guy.
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She was in school in an island, that's all I'm going to say.
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And she was dating this guy just because if I get into more
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details, it'll it'll identify who I'm talking about, at least
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to anyone who knows this person. She was dating this guy who's
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probably the worst person I've ever met in my life.
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Him. And there was this girl I knew
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growing up. Oh my God, she's actually the
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worst person I've ever met in my entire fucking life.
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Like this person is, I'm going to say something kind of crazy.
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I think this person could be the devil.
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This girl, I'll just say her name because I don't give a
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fuck. Her name's Ari.
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She is the worst person I've ever met in my entire life.
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Our parents, our friends, I don't know what they did to her
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growing up, but she, I think it's possible.
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I think it's possible that she is Satan.
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Like she literally is a human personification of Satan.
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She's actually evil. Like she, there's something
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really wrong with her. She, like, if she had her way, I
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wouldn't be alive right now. I'll put it like that.
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Like she was four years older than me and she constantly
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created scenarios to try to get me put in.
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Like serious physical harm is the only way I can describe it.
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Like she purposefully created scenarios in which she knew I
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would be in physical danger. Like she's actually psychotic.
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Like there's something so fucking wrong with this person.
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So she's the worst person I've ever met.
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This guy that my friend dated is a second.
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He's not quite to her level because I don't think he's evil,
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but he is a massive, massive, massive asshole.
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He was very wealthy though, so I will give him that.
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And that's kind of where his positive attributes start and
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end quite. Oh no, he's cute, He's cute,
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He's cute, he's cute. That's it.
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That's literally it. I can't say a single other good
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thing about him. He is the rudest person I've
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ever, ever met. Like, it's actually insane how
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he speaks to people. Anyway, so I went down to visit
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her. It was hands down the worst five
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days of my life. I'm not going to get into all
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the details right right now just because I don't have any trauma
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therapy lined up, but one of the days we're on his boat, which I
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think might qualify as a yacht again, I'm not entirely sure
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with a bunch of his friends who were all actually quite lovely
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people. I will give them that.
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But I, and I really kind of was like the asshole in this
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scenario. I just my tummy hurt.
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I really had to poo, but I didn't want to poo on the boat.
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And because I had to poo, I didn't want to drink because I
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didn't want, I just didn't want to consume anything.
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So it was just kind of like clenching my butt cheeks and
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like physically uncomfortable, plus just uncomfortable with my
14:57
scenario there. And everyone knew each other and
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I was sober and everyone's drunk.
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And I just like I wasn't being very fond, like I will fully own
15:05
that. I wasn't being very fun and I
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just felt so uncomfortable with everything that was happening
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around me. Like I that relationship was so
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toxic and this is someone who I really care about.
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So I was just like feeling all of the feelings of that.
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And you know, at the time I didn't have as good a boundary.
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So anything that happened to anyone, it was like it was
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happening to me anyway. So I was just kind of going
15:26
through a lot and I was like kind of just being hermity and
15:28
weird and I just did not have talked to anyone.
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Like, have you ever been in that scenario where everyone kind of
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knows each other and is having fun and for whatever reason you
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just aren't being very fun that day?
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And it's like, I'm aware that I'm the wet blanket and I just
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like, don't even know how to stop.
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Anyway, So there was this guy on the boat and he he comes over.
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He's like, Oh my God, you have the most beautiful feet.
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And I said, really these old things.
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And he's like, yeah, wait, can I just look at your foot real
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quick? And I was like, sure, like what
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a weird thing to ask. So he picks up my foot like it's
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an inhabitant object. Like it was like, it was my
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purse. Like he's like, Oh my God, I
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love your purse. Can I take a look at it?
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Picks up my foot and it's just like twisting it around,
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admiring it, like as though it's not attached to my body.
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Okay anyway, Long story short, I think for two hours he took
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photos with my feet. I'm not even joking.
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Like he was like there was a whole photo shoot, like there
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was someone else standing behind me.
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My face wasn't in any of these photos.
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He's just using my feet as props in these photos, putting my feet
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on like either side of his head. I'm taking photos with them.
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And I was like, honestly, this is the least offensive thing
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that's happened to me since I've been on this island this trip.
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So I will take it. Please, as long as you need to
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use my feet. It's like an excuse.
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Like, have you ever, oh God, again, have you ever been to a
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party or a situation where again, you're being socially
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awkward? You're the problem.
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I'm not taking anyone else's at fault here.
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And it's like you just don't have anything to do.
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So you start trying to find ways to make yourself useful.
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It's like, let me help the caterers, you know, like let me
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any way that I can find a thing to do so that I'm not just
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awkwardly standing around. I was like, you know what?
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Use my feed. It's a good excuse for me not
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talking to anyone. OK, so now that we're done with
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all the feed stories, let's go back to the ghost.
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So I'm super bloated, I'm painfully bloated.
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I'm doing my skin care. Ozzie comes in, he's like, I'm
17:37
so sorry. I looked, I searched high and
17:40
low in that cabinet. I really cannot find the bloat
17:43
pills. And I say, you know what, it's
17:44
no big deal. I I'm sure I just finished them
17:48
and I forgot that I finished them.
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So I start Googling and by Googling, I mean asking cha chi
17:54
BT what else I can do for kind of rapid instant relief.
17:57
And I go back to the kitchen. I put a pot of hot put water on
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because I was going to make this little herb blend for myself.
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And then I go to the sink. I think I wash my hands or
18:10
something, I don't know. Whatever, whatever a person does
18:12
it a sink. And then I turn around and
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sitting right in the middle of the kitchen counter is the Hilma
18:18
bloat pills. And I said, hey, I thought you
18:21
said you couldn't find them. And he said, no, I didn't.
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And I said, well, then what's this?
18:25
And he looked over and he's like, are you fucking with me?
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And I said no, are you fucking with me?
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What are you like, what are you talking about?
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And so this goes on for a while. Neither of us was fucking with
18:36
the other. Neither of us really know what
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happened. Now there, there are plausible,
18:40
reasonable explanations, for example.
18:43
And we're, we're really kind of like like running through it.
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He's like, I don't know, maybe as I was going through that
18:49
cabinet, I grabbed this without seeing it and put it on the
18:53
counter and then for and never saw it.
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And I just never registered that I did that.
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I mean, that's so far fetched. And then what's even more far
19:01
fetched than that is I then walked in the kitchen, did 20
19:05
things, also didn't see it until I turned around from the sink.
19:08
Like it doesn't track. It makes more sense that there's
19:11
a friendly ghost. Like it really is becoming the
19:14
most reasonable little explanation.
19:17
So that's one thing that happened.
19:21
And then since, OK, so those were all kind of like things for
19:25
me and they've been helpful things.
19:27
And then a couple of things have happened to Ozzy that are less
19:31
friendly. It's like, for example, the
19:32
other day he turned on the dryer and then a minute later the
19:36
dryer was not only not on, but the door was wide open like as
19:40
though he had never turned it on.
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And he's like, I swear to God, I turned it on.
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Like, I'm positive, I know I shut the door.
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I know I heard the buttons beep. And I was like, I thought you
19:49
did too. I really did think you did too.
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But that and there was something else that happened to him.
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I can't remember. I really can't remember what it
19:57
was, but it was another thing where he thought he did
19:59
something and it was undone. So my working theory is that
20:05
there is a ghost. It's a man, he's in love with
20:07
me, obviously, because he has eyes and ears.
20:11
I mean, hello, I'm cute and I'm funny.
20:13
Why wouldn't he love me? And he is fucking with Ozzy so
20:17
that he can be my number one man's.
20:19
And you know what? I very much welcome this energy.
20:23
Let the games begin. Maybe I will let them jewel over
20:28
me if that's what it comes to. I think Ozzy's in the next room
20:32
listening, being like, no, the ghost can have you truly, you
20:35
fucking psycho bitch. So yeah, that's how my life's
20:40
going right now. Anyway.
20:42
It is the second Tuesday of the month, so I think we should get
20:45
into trends. But before we got into trends,
20:47
there's actually something I want to talk about.
20:50
It could be a bit of a trend, if you will.
20:53
It's not like a technical health and Wellness trend, but we are
20:57
going to talk about it because I want to.
20:59
So there was a Vogue article that I actually have not read,
21:03
by the way, but I do think we should talk about it.
21:07
I'm going to pull it up right now.
21:08
You know what, maybe I'll like read little excerpts of it right
21:11
now aloud so that we can discuss it.
21:14
I'm sure you've heard of the article by now.
21:16
It's called Is having a boyfriend embarrassing now?
21:19
Which yes, it is. I can go ahead and tell you that
21:23
now without reading. Oh my God, excuse me, We are on
21:27
an audio platform. My mom has always kind of been
21:30
my what the fuck is this great impact on my life.
21:37
OK, we will not be reading that article because it won't stop
21:40
talking. So, but I believe the conclusion
21:44
is that it's embarrassing to have a boyfriend or not to that
21:47
to not quite to that extent, but just that, like men are stupid
21:51
and, you know, there really is kind of no point having a
21:55
boyfriend anymore. Now the women are, you know,
21:58
able to be financially independent.
22:00
It's like literally what's the point now that we can hire
22:02
plumbers, now that we can, you know, hire people to do things
22:05
that we once needed men to do and we can earn that money to
22:10
hire those men to do the things, then why even bother?
22:13
I don't know if the article goes into this, but there are a lot
22:16
of statistics on how this is just for straight women.
22:20
It's not like this for lesbians, but straight women, or for
22:27
straight people in general. So when straight men get
22:29
married, they become more successful, happier, and live
22:32
longer. When straight women get married,
22:34
they are less happy, less successful, and live shorter.
22:39
So like, marriage really is this institution that seems to
22:42
singularly benefit men in the heteronormative context.
22:48
Now, I have a few things to say about this.
22:50
Obviously, I have a boyfriend. I really love my boyfriend.
22:55
I do think that my boyfriend is the exception to the rule in
23:01
that he is exceptionally helpful around the house and that's kind
23:07
of it. Oh well, no.
23:08
And he's super, super feminist and he never does anything shady
23:12
and I like never have to worry about him and all these other
23:15
things, right. But I think the big thing is
23:17
that like he's a good guy. Like he actually makes my life
23:21
better on the net net. I do think that historically,
23:25
every other relationship I've had, for the most part, I'm just
23:29
like, like, looking back on it, I'm like, literally what was the
23:33
point of that? What was the point of that
23:35
unnecessary stress that I took on?
23:37
What was the point of me having to like raise this little man
23:40
child? And by the way, Ozzy is really,
23:43
really good for a guy. But like, think about it.
23:48
Think about how often we talk about how good Ozzy is as a guy.
23:52
That's how low the bar is. Do you know how often Ozzy and
23:55
his friends and his family talk about like, oh, Heba cleaned or
23:58
Heba did laundry or Heba cooked? No, those are just the
24:01
expectations that we have on women.
24:03
But when a man does something, all of a sudden it's this big
24:06
party celebration. Oh my God, let's throw a fucking
24:09
parade. A man knew how to do a fucking
24:11
dish. So that's number one, I guess.
24:13
OK, here's what I want to say about this.
24:15
Ultimately, as much as I love to shed on men, I actually think
24:20
this is a woman problem and let me explain why.
24:23
How is it that we are living in a society where there's this
24:28
huge stereotype and trope of women are dying to settle down
24:33
and get married and men are the 1 rebuffing and rejecting it
24:37
when the institution of marriage singularly benefits them?
24:41
They should be knocking down our doors, begging, pleading, crying
24:45
on their knees like stomping around, having tantrums, begging
24:50
us to settle down with them. How is it that we as women have
24:54
given so much power away that we seem to be begging to be in
25:01
these institutions that don't even benefit us?
25:04
Like that's fucking nuts. So do I think having a boyfriend
25:08
is embarrassing? No.
25:10
But what I do think is embarrassing, which I see so
25:14
often in society, is having your sense of self worth be dependent
25:20
on a man liking you. And we see this all the fucking
25:25
time. Like how many people do you like
25:27
think about how girls act when they get engaged.
25:30
Like Oh my God he loves me like he wants to be with me.
25:33
Like, yes, he should. Like, are you fucking kidding
25:38
me? Like you didn't see how good you
25:40
were until some man gave you a stone.
25:43
Are you, are you out of your fucking mind?
25:46
I mean, think about how many friends you know, where all they
25:49
talk about is either their love life or once they're in a
25:52
relationship, they're boyfriends.
25:53
You know, I had this friend. I'm not friends with her
25:56
anymore. I talked about her a lot last
25:58
year because that friendship ending was really, really
26:00
painful. Just to jog your memory, this is
26:02
the friend who last year when I was literally suicidal and my
26:06
dog was like out of control sick and I was just drowning, like
26:10
literally drowning and how hard it was.
26:13
She not once checked in on me as I was doing much less offer to
26:17
help her anything. We're not friends anymore.
26:19
Anyway, so our friendship really started to change when she found
26:23
her partner, right? Like when she was single, she
26:26
was a great friend. As soon as she found her
26:28
boyfriend, she not only like stopped really being a friend
26:32
and all the ways that I just listed, but also anytime we
26:36
talked, all she would talk about is her boyfriend.
26:38
Like she would just like disappear for like weeks at a
26:40
time and then reappear and be like, Oh my God, Max spot me
26:43
this, Max spot me that. Like, oh, let me tell you about
26:46
all the big gifts that Max spot me.
26:47
Oh, let me tell you about all the things that Max said.
26:49
Like oh, let me tell you about all the things Max and I did.
26:51
And it was just so embarrassing, honestly.
26:56
Like it wasn't even annoying. It was embarrassing.
27:00
Like I actually felt so embarrassed for her where I was
27:03
like, you have a PhD, like you have a job that you're
27:09
passionate about, you're so smart, you're interesting,
27:12
you're pretty, and all you can fucking talk about is your
27:16
boyfriend. Like that is so embarrassing for
27:19
you. Like I'm actually embarrassed
27:22
for you. And I was noticing this a lot
27:25
this past week by the way, I noticed that I say notice weird
27:29
sometimes, like I almost say it with a Midwestern Tang.
27:32
I don't know twang. I don't know what that is.
27:34
Tang sure, whatever. I was watching a lot of Bravo
27:37
this week, you know, because I'm sick and and every single
27:42
housewives franchise that I watched this week, I noticed
27:47
there was so much like emphasis on whether a guy likes you or
27:54
not, right. In one episode of Real
27:56
Housewives of Potomac, I saw it 3 or 4 times.
27:59
Number one, that new bitch Angel don't like her.
28:02
Sorry Angel. I know she's a big listener of
28:05
the show. Sorry I don't really fuck with
28:08
you. The amount that she talks about
28:10
her boy, her husband and how he is an ex NFL player.
28:15
But that's not even the point. It's like she just constantly
28:17
like she thinks her sense of self worth comes from the fact
28:20
that issues with an NFL player or that she even has a husband
28:23
to begin with. There's another one who at some
28:25
point like their fights, I just OK, so there are two of them
28:30
that were fighting and one of them's like, yeah, I know that
28:33
you're stressed because like you things aren't good with your
28:36
boyfriend, but don't take it out on me.
28:38
And the other ones like, no, I know you're stressed because
28:41
your husband cheats on you. And she's like, no, I know
28:43
you're stressed because your husband talks down on you.
28:45
It's like, bitch, both of you should be stressed because
28:48
neither of you seem to have anything going on in your lives
28:51
other than your romantic partners.
28:53
And then like one of them is like, well, at least like I've
28:56
never been the other woman. And the other ones, like I've
28:59
never been the side trick, but I've always been the fiance.
29:01
And it's like, OK, for number 1, you haven't always been the
29:04
fiance. Just like by definition, that's
29:06
not how it works. Clearly you don't know what a
29:07
fiance means, but #2 it's so clear that she's like, well,
29:11
look at me, I'm good enough for someone to propose to and no
29:14
one's proposed to you. It's like all of these people
29:17
are comparing themselves to each other based on whether they have
29:20
have a boyfriend, how good that boyfriend is and how good that
29:23
boyfriend treats them, how much money he spends on them.
29:26
And it's, it's again, it's fucking embarrassing.
29:28
Like you should be fighting over how much money you guys make
29:31
about how much the shit you're doing.
29:34
If you're going to petty dumb fights, fight about your own
29:37
shit. Don't act like being loved by a
29:41
man is this prize and this trophy.
29:43
Because quite frankly, being loved by a man should be the
29:47
bare fucking minimum, OK? They're like barn animals.
29:50
It would be like celebrating that a pig looked at you.
29:55
OK, hold on the door. Anyway, as I was saying before I
30:04
was rudely interrupted by the door, it would be like
30:07
celebrating that. Like, oh, the goat let me pet
30:10
it. Yeah, of course the goat fucking
30:12
let you pet it, and that's half a brain cell, OK?
30:16
All it wants is to be pet. The goat is getting more from
30:19
this transaction than you are. Why don't you get this?
30:23
As women, we need to understand men are getting more from this
30:27
transaction than we are. It shouldn't mean that much to
30:31
us. And this is coming from the girl
30:32
who was the most desperate ever to find a boyfriend.
30:36
So, like, I, I trust me. I get it.
30:40
I just. OK.
30:41
And now I want to contrast it with my friend.
30:43
I'm also going to use. No, maybe I won't use her real
30:47
name in case, just in case. So I have this friend, let's
30:50
just call her Megan, cool ass bitch.
30:53
So she has this boyfriend now they've been dating for a few
30:56
months. They've known each other for a
30:58
while, but I'd say they've been together.
31:00
They've probably been together for over six months now.
31:02
I don't know. I actually don't know.
31:04
And you know why I don't know? Because Megan never fucking
31:06
talks about him, never talks about him.
31:09
It's almost like he doesn't exist.
31:11
I was joking the other day. I was like, I honestly, I feel
31:14
like if I weren't asking, talking about her from time to
31:16
time, like a few years from now I might get a wedding invitation
31:20
and be like, wait, when did you guys start dating?
31:22
Like I literally have no idea. And you know why she doesn't
31:26
talk about it? It's cuz Megan talks about her
31:29
art, she talks about her hobbies, she talks about her
31:32
interest. We talk about spirituality, we
31:34
talk about manifestation, we talk about energetics, we talk
31:37
about self development, we talk about self improvement.
31:40
We talk about all these fucking things because our plates are so
31:42
fucking full that like, who gives a shit about boyfriend?
31:45
Oh, yeah, I started dating someone.
31:47
Oh, we had sex. It was good.
31:49
Who gives a fuck? We've all done it.
31:51
We've all done it. Like, grow up.
31:53
Like I, I am just so sick of this narrative.
31:57
And again, I love, I love shitting on men.
32:00
OK? I've done it 20 times already
32:01
this episode. It's so fun.
32:03
But I don't think we can blame this on men because men only do
32:07
what we allow them to do. Again, they're like barn
32:10
animals. If your goat escapes, if your
32:13
pig escapes from its pen, we don't blame the pig.
32:17
We blame you because you didn't build the pen well enough.
32:21
I really don't know a lot about farms or like barn animals at
32:25
all. You know what I mean?
32:28
It's your fault. Your brain is bigger.
32:30
You should have done it better. And I also don't like to shit on
32:34
women. I really don't because I think
32:36
we get it every which way. I just really want to say, I
32:40
think can we all just collectively try to decenter men
32:44
a little bit more from our lives?
32:48
And do you know what? When you do that, I think that
32:50
you'll find far more fulfilling relationships.
32:53
And I think that your relationships overall will flow
32:56
a lot better when you put so much less emphasis on it in your
33:01
life. I kind of want to add them.
33:03
So I feel like I've said a lot and I just don't know that it's
33:09
going to be any better. And honestly, the Wellness
33:11
trends were kind of meh. Let me see if there is anyone.
33:15
No, no, none of them are worth it.
33:17
Let's just end it here. Let's just end it here.
33:20
You know what's like a good Wellness trend that we should
33:23
all embark on this week? Prioritizing yourself and
33:28
actually truly prioritizing yourself.
33:31
I don't mean like doing a little self-care because most of us
33:34
don't do self-care for self prioritization reasons.
33:39
We do self-care because it's like, oh, I'm going to do this
33:41
face mask and in the back of your mind, it's like, oh,
33:44
because if I look better than this could happen or that could
33:46
happen or whatever. Let's actually try to really
33:49
prioritize ourselves this week. Let's really try to focus on our
33:53
gifts, our strengths, what makes us happy, what we're good at,
34:00
what we want to be good at, what we can share with people, and
34:04
just bring all those things to the light in a really authentic
34:08
way. Let's all just take a week where
34:11
we try to validate ourselves internally rather than using
34:16
outside factors. Men and relationships being one
34:19
of them, but also other things like career and amount of money
34:23
we make and physical objects we own.
34:25
All of these things. Let's just take a week where we
34:29
really feel an internal sense of validation instead of letting
34:35
these outside things affect us and influence us.
34:38
How does that sound? Let's just wrap it up here and
34:40
we'll check in next week. OK, Love ya bye.
34:44
If you loved that episode as much as I hope you did, make
34:47
sure to hit subscribe so you don't miss a thing and check out
34:50
some past episodes while you wait for the new one to drop
34:53
next week. And until next week, make sure
34:56
to stay hunty out there.