Latest / The Daily Sarcast / March 19, 2026: Chaos, Cigarettes And Carrots

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March 19, 2026: Chaos, Cigarettes And Carrots · The Daily Sarcast

• 0:00
  This episode is sponsored by my never-ending illness. It was a beautiful day. That was real.
• 0:07
  Zendaya clarifying the rumor that she married Tom Holland when it was really
• 0:10
  just AI from a movie she was filming, a wedding with Robert Pattinson.
• 0:15
  Insert theme song here. This is the Daily Starcast. I give you the news and
• 0:19
  maybe a laugh. I'm Lindsay Vernick and it's March 19th, 2026.
• 0:23
  I am literally so over being sick that if I'm not done being sick in the next
• 0:29
  couple days, I'm just going to go back to pretending that I'm not sick anymore
• 0:32
  because I just can't take it.
• 0:33
  In real news, the U.S. is temporarily relaxing the Jones Act for 60 days,
• 0:39
  which requires goods shipped between the U.S.
• 0:42
  Ports to be carried on American-made and operated ships.
• 0:46
  The idea is to lower transportation costs by allowing cheaper foreign boats
• 0:50
  to move fuel, natural gas, and other stuff around the country.
• 0:54
  This is because gas prices have jumped up to about $3.84 a gallon,
• 0:59
  which is up nearly 30% since late February, after the Iran war started and oil
• 1:05
  prices started surging globally.
• 1:07
  But here's the catch. Experts say the Jones Act only adds about 1.5 cents to the price of gas.
• 1:14
  So even with this change, when you're pumping your gas, you're likely to see
• 1:18
  little to no difference at the pump.
• 1:20
  Most of the price spike is coming from the coast of crude oil itself,
• 1:24
  which has risen around 40% due to disruptions in the Persian Gulf.
• 1:29
  Supporters of the law argue it protects U.S. shipping jobs and national security,
• 1:33
  while critics say it drives up costs, especially in places like Puerto Rico, Alaska, and Hawaii.
• 1:39
  Some industry leaders are already calling this more of a political thing than an economic solution.
• 1:44
  However, the U.S. plans to release 172 million barrels of oil from its secret
• 1:50
  Reserve over the next few months, though prices have continued to rise despite the.
• 1:56
  I mean, is it that bad that we have to dive into our secret stash? I guess so.
• 2:01
  Birds are now apparently smokers. Not like actually, though, of course.
• 2:05
  Researchers found that some birds, including blue tits, yes,
• 2:09
  that's the name of a bird, are putting cigarette butts in their nests,
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  not because they've had a long day, but because the chemicals in cigarettes
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  can help kill parasites like fleas and ticks.
• 2:20
  Cigarette filters contain thousands of compounds, including nicotine and other
• 2:24
  toxins, which basically act as a DIY pest control system for baby birds.
• 2:29
  In one study, nests with cigarette butts had fewer parasites,
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  and in some cases, healthier chicks compared to untreated nests.
• 2:38
  And birds aren't just casually tossing one in. In places like Mexico City,
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  some birds are using up to 10 cigarette butts per nest, and even adding more
• 2:47
  when parasite levels increase.
• 2:49
  So yeah, birds are actively problem-solving and adjusting their behavior,
• 2:53
  while humans are still Googling why do I have a headache and assuming they have a brain tumor.
• 2:57
  There is a downside to this, though. While the cigarette butts may reduce parasites,
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  researchers also found signs of genetic damage in some chicks,
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  so it's not exactly a clean habit.
• 3:08
  But basically, birds are smart, adaptable, and possibly making better health
• 3:13
  trades than some people.
• 3:14
  In more serious news, the search for Nancy Guthrie has now entered its 47th day.
• 3:20
  Authorities reviewed new security footage from around her home in Arizona,
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  but unfortunately it didn't provide any major breakthroughs.
• 3:27
  The footage showed activity before and after her disappearance,
• 3:30
  but nothing from the actual day she went missing.
• 3:33
  Nancy, who is 84 years old, was last seen on January 31st.
• 3:37
  Police later found blood on her porch, which they've described as very concerning.
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  The FBI has also released an image of a potential suspect as a masked and gloved
• 3:46
  individual seen at her front door the night she disappeared.
• 3:49
  Right now, the investigation is ongoing, but leads are very limited.
• 3:54
  The family has raised the reward to $1 million and has acknowledged the possibility
• 3:58
  that she may not be alive anymore.
• 4:00
  Her daughter Savannah recently returned to the Today Show and thanked her colleagues
• 4:04
  for their support and saying she plans to come back to work,
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  even as her family continues to search for answers.
• 4:10
  It's one of those stories where there are still more questions than answers,
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  and right now the focus remains on finding her and finding out what actually happened.
• 4:18
  And Lindsay Life, if you were wondering what it's like to live with me,
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  I texted my roommate yesterday.
• 4:23
  Do you want carrots? I made an obscene amount because I bought an obscene amount.
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  Things that feel illegal but actually are not. Giving up your table at a restaurant
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  before ordering anything.
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  Walking out of the grocery store without buying anything.
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  Taking a phone call in a silent crowded room.
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  Saying you too when a waiter tells you to enjoy your meal. And existing in 2026.
• 4:47
  Cooking tip of the day roasting your carrots with some salt and olive oil is delicious,
• 4:52
  feedback comments questions on h jewish by looking for a date email me at lindsey
• 4:56
  at thedailystarcast.com thanks so much for listening remember if you guys like
• 5:01
  this please share this with your friends and your family if you like them enough
• 5:05
  and i will talk to you guys tomorrow.