Latest / The Art of Love With Lucia / Episode 613: Think You Can't Get Your Ex Back After Years Apart?

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Episode 613: Think You Can't Get Your Ex Back After Years Apart? · The Art of Love With Lucia

• 0:00
  Hi, this is Lucia with Yard of Love.
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  I'm a dating and relationship expert specializing and helping
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  you get your ex back or to get over your ex.
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  This week I'm finally going to talk about the video I've been
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  teasing for a while and other videos about my client who got
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  his ex back after years apart. So for those of you who have
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  been apart from your ex or broken up for years, or who are
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  afraid you're going to be broken up for years, this is for you.
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  But first I want to welcome back my no contact army.
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  If you are having trouble staying in no contact, then
• 0:38
  download my app Silencio and you can find that link underneath
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  every single video and every single podcast.
• 0:44
  And if you too would like to join our army, all you have to
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  do is hit the subscribe button and the bell notification and
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  you're in. And to read our manual, go to
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  nocontactsecrets.com where you can read two free chapters
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  before purchasing the book. OK, so this is actually my
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  second client to get an ex back after more than two years apart.
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  And the two stories actually have several similarities, which
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  I will tell you about at the end of this video after I read his
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  e-mail. So here we go, he says.
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  I'm happy to report that my ex and I have been dating for three
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  months and are officially back together for about two months
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  now, and her interest level is definitely in the 90s once
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  again. They were previously engaged
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  actually, when she broke up with him and she was breadcrumbing
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  him for the first eight or nine months of this over 2 year
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  breakup. OK, continuing I hear from her
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  four to 10 times a day. Damn.
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  See here three to four times a week and things have been going
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  very well. I've been reintroduced her
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  immediate family and close friends again, her brother said
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  a couple of weeks ago. I speak for everyone when I say
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  we're all hoping you two don't screw this up again, haha.
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  I even had lunch with her dad and he said that he was hoping
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  that I would meet up with him to ask for her hand.
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  I said that I would soon, and he said that she told him she's
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  ready. She's letting me know very
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  clearly that if I propose, she'll say yes.
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  And I'm planning to propose in the Caribbean, either early late
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  fall or early winter. The more comfortable she gets,
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  the more she's opened up to me about our 26 months apart.
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  That's two years and two months, she said.
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  I was always kind of hovering around in her mind.
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  OK, so for those of you who are afraid that your ex is going to
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  forget you, that she dated tons of guys but compared all of them
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  to me and nobody measured up, that's right.
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  If you're the best option, if you are the best that you can be
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  in the relationship, if you worked on yourself when you were
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  single, and even when you're in a relationship and you do your
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  best, then even if they break up with you and they are away from
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  you, they're not going to be able to replace you.
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  She said nobody measured up. She said she missed me even over
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  a year later. So again, for those of you
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  afraid that your ex is going to forget you and not think about
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  you, here she was even a year after the breakup, missing him
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  to the point that she would randomly burst into tears.
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  She knew I still loved her, so she couldn't understand.
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  Now listen to this how I could just walk away and never reach
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  out. I wonder what happened.
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  Oh, I know he joined the No Contact army.
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  That's what happened. For those of you who think that
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  your ex is not going to be wondering why you haven't
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  reached out, well duh. She also came out and said that
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  she didn't have sex with anyone since me, and I believe her.
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  She says I'm still her fifth person and better be her last.
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  So for those few guys who always comment that if a one woman
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  breaks up with you that she's going to be out writing the you
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  know what carousel, no, most women are not doing that okay.
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  But you can think that if it makes you feel better.
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  And he says our plan is to get married next summer or maybe
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  early spring. Thank you for everything.
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  Without your guidance, this would not be happening.
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  She remarks often that I have changed and that not only am I
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  not jealous, but I just seem more confident and secure
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  overall, she said. It's not an act, I can just feel
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  it whenever I'm around you. It makes me feel safe.
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  Okay, there's lots to unpack in this sentence.
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  So first of all, I did a video about why you should never show
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  jealousy and I'll put the link up in the right hand corner on
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  YouTube and that was the main reason she broke up with him
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  because he was just continually showing jealousy and a certain
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  point she couldn't take it anymore.
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  He was very confident at first because before they were, you
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  know, exclusive, there were other guys and he was like, no
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  problem, no problem, he was cool.
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  But then at a certain point, his interest level went up.
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  And what did I say? When your interest level is
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  above 90, you can't control what you say and you can't control
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  what you do, but you know what you have to, because otherwise
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  if you keep showing jealousy, you're going to get dumped.
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  I mean a bit here and there is fine, obviously, because if you
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  never show any jealousy at all, they'd be like, damn, do you
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  even care? And I know that in certain
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  cultures they say, well, you have to show jealousy, otherwise
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  they'll think you don't care. Yeah, OK fine.
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  But in the West, in most cultures, excessive jealousy is
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  not going to work because it comes across as insecure.
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  And at first it's cute, but then at certain points, like, geez,
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  you know, I can't take this anymore.
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  And it's sad because if he had had his jealousy under control,
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  they would not be broken up. So they lost two years, two
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  years and two months of being together because he didn't fix
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  his jealousy. So if this is you and you're
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  listening to this and you know you have insecurity and jealousy
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  issues, I would suggest you work on them now because you don't
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  want to look back and say, Gee, we lost all this time because of
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  me or any other issue you might have.
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  Doesn't even have to be jealousy.
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  And she says that. And I yeah, when he told me he
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  would, she broke up with him. Because of that, I gave him a
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  little talking to him. Like, dude, you can't do that.
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  I'm sure I said something like that.
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  And the fact that she said she was the word confident, he
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  seemed more confident. What do I always say is the
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  number one quality people want in a partner confidence, which
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  is the opposite of jealousy. And she said he makes me feel
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  safe. And that is the number one thing
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  that women want besides obviously confidence.
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  They want to feel safe on all levels, physically, mentally,
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  emotionally, sexually. And if they don't, they're out
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  of there. Some sooner rather than later.
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  Okay. And she goes, I'm he goes she.
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  I know like you and I talked about it would be silly and
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  stupid at this point to get jealous again about anyone.
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  Absolutely. She clearly never got over me
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  either in the 26 months apart, despite having every chance to
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  do it. Plus she wants to marry me
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  again. It isn't shy about letting me
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  know this time I would get it right for good.
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  I have to admit, this brought tears to my eyes reading this
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  because, well, obviously because I worked with him for such a
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  long time. I mean, we weren't in constant
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  contact, obviously, because, you know, she would pop up.
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  They ran into each other at a coffee shop.
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  They talked for hours. All kinds of things were
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  happening in the 222 years and two months.
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  It's not like it was two years and two months of no contact.
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  That's not how it works. So yeah, I'm so happy it worked.
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  And just to think that, you know, if they have children,
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  which I think they probably will, if they hadn't gotten back
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  together, whatever children they have would never be born.
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  So I like to think that I have a little part in their unborn
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  children being born. Just a little part.
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  And if you have found this entertaining and helpful so far,
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  then please give this a like to help the YouTube algorithm.
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  Apparently it likes likes, we all like likes, and that way
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  more people can find the video. So I mentioned earlier that I
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  had another client that also got the X back after 2 / 2 years.
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  And the similarities are that first of all, they're both men.
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  So for the guys, usually it's the guy saying, oh you can't get
• 9:01
  a woman back or you can't get a woman back with no contact.
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  Well, both of them worked with me.
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  Both of them went through long periods of no contact and they
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  got their woman back. And they like my first client,
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  the one that I haven't done a video on, even at a certain
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  point, I was like, I think you just move on.
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  And he just refused to, he refused to.
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  So for the women listening, if a guy really wants you, if a guy's
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  really into you, if a guy realized he messed up, he will
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  keep trying and trying and trying, even if he's in no
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  contact or he's just popping up here and there.
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  He's. I mean, my client here, he
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  wasn't. He did try to date other women.
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  He just was not interested. He could not forget this woman,
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  but he didn't reach out to her because she broke up with him.
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  But like I said, she kept popping up.
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  As with my other client, she was popping up too.
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  I mean, when you go through a breakup and it's 2 1/2 years,
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  two years, there is going to be contact.
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  So it matters how you handle that contact over that long
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  period of time. That then determines whether you
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  finally get back together or not.
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  So those are the similarities. So now I want to hear from you,
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  how long have you been broken up with and would you still try to
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  get an X back after more than one year or even 2 years apart?
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  That's a long time. Most people just give up after,
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  you know, six months, nine months and go okay.
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  I guess they're not coming back. I'll move on, so please comment
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  below and if you would like my help to get your X back,
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  hopefully it won't take two years.
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  Don't worry, it doesn't always take two years.
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  Contact me at theartoflove.net, We'll send you the rates.
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  The direct link is below. If you're listening to this as a
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  podcast, please rate and review. If you found this video helpful,
• 10:55
  please like, subscribe and share.
• 10:56
  And finally, remember that love inspires, empowers, uplifts and
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  enlightens.