Latest / The SmallBizChat with Melinda Emerson / Harness the Power of Your Anxiety with Dr. Chloe Carmichael

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Harness the Power of Your Anxiety with Dr. Chloe Carmichael · The SmallBizChat with Melinda Emerson

• 0:01
  Hi.
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  This is Melinda Emerson, the small biz lady host of the small Bizchett podcast.
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  I want to serve you.
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  This pandemic has been so hard on America's small businesses and on just America in
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  general.
• 0:13
  If you're ready to start your dream business, boy, do I have a great offer for you?
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  I am giving away 1000 copies of my best selling book, become your own boss in 12 months.
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  Over a hundred thousand people have this book It has been printed in multiple languages
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  around the world, and I wanted to find a way to serve America small businesses in this
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  pandemic.
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  And so I am giving away a 1000 copies of my book.
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  All you have to do to get your copy is head over to begin my biz dotcom slash free offer
• 0:44
  to, you know, sign up for your copy.
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  All you have to do is pay shipping, and we will mail one out to you.
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  I am so excited about this.
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  I wanna serve you.
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  Grab your copy today.
• 0:56
  Ending small business failure.
• 0:58
  Welcome to the small biz chat podcast with a number one small business expert, Melinda
• 1:04
  Emerson.
• 1:05
  Melinda's goal is to end small business failure, and she'll give you the information
• 1:09
  you need succeed and live the life you dream of.
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  Now here's the small biz lady herself.
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  Melinda Everson.
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  Hi.
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  I'm Melina Everson's small business lady.
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  America's number one small business expert and I would like to welcome you to the Small Bench
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  Chat podcast.
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  If you are suffering from anxiety with everything going on with this pandemic, You are
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  not alone.
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  Doctor Chloe Carmichael is here to help us all.
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  She's a licensed clinical psychologist and author of the new book, nervous energy.
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  Harness the power of your anxiety.
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  She heads a successful private practice in New York City and writes a blog for psychology
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  today.
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  Her holistic approach includes stress management techniques that help people overcome
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  anxiety for more information Go to doctor Chloe.com.
• 2:00
  Chloe, welcome.
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  Thank you so much for coming to the small business chat podcast.
• 2:04
  Thanks, Melinda.
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  It's so great to be with you.
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  Well, listen.
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  I've been waiting all day to talk to you.
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  Okay?
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  I feel like you should put your little sign out that says the doctors in 5 says, okay.
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  So talk to me.
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  It we've we've been living in some stressful times.
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  Now everybody's stressed out over trying to get the vaccine.
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  Right?
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  So How how are people coping with stress these days?
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  Well, you know, everybody has different ways, of course, and some people are healthier than
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  others, but One of the things that I've been excited for people to understand is that they
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  can take that stress and almost use it as a springboard for healthy activities.
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  So, you know, whether that means connecting more with the people around you or like some of
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  your earlier guests were seeing about building new skills and digging deeper and becoming more
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  resilient, those are really the best ways that we can cope.
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  So many of your clients are highly successful people.
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  Distress affects successful people differently than the rest of us.
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  Like, how does that work?
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  Yeah.
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  I mean, on a certain level it can because successful people are used to, you know, being
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  successful.
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  They're used to feeling to a certain degree, at least in control of their lives, not that
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  they've never had challenges.
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  They're successful because they can overcome challenges.
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  But they're not necessarily accustomed to pandemic type challenges.
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  Right?
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  So when we're suddenly destabilized and thrown a curve ball, and we're not used to being in a
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  scramble position quite as much.
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  That can be kind of unnerving for success.
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  Full people.
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  It can be unnerving for everybody, of course, but again, the good news is is that mother
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  nature actually gives us a little extra boost of adrenaline when we get knocked off, and
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  that's how we can use it to come back even stronger.
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  Alright.
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  So in your book, nervous energy, you refer to successful people as high functioning people.
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  What does that mean?
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  And and could you be a high functioning person without even knowing it?
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  Yes.
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  I think you absolutely could be.
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  So a clinical term, high functioning, basically people that are they have enough resources
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  cognitively and emotionally to be able who say, spend an alarm and get out of bed at a certain
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  time, whether or not they feel like it, to hold a job, to have a couple of good relationships
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  those are things, Melinda, that we might just take for granted as that's just everyday life
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  and that's doing what we're supposed to do.
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  But actually, it's pretty special.
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  And so in psychology, someone who's doing all of those things is generally considered to be
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  high functioning.
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  So Yes.
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  Many people could be high functioning and not even actually know it.
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  Alright.
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  Well, that's interesting.
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  So I know that in your book, you talk about the 9 anxiety tool to help people harness their
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  nervous energy for good.
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  Can you tell us some of your favorite tools that you like to use on people?
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  Sure.
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  Well, Melinda, when I would imagine would connect with your audience is called the to do
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  list with emotions because I know We all have to do lists, right, especially busy business
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  owners.
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  But what a lot of successful people can sometimes find is that they feel like they're
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  procrastinating and they're not sure why, or they have that kind of hamster on a wheel
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  feeling where they're just doing all these tasks but they're not getting the fulfillment
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  that they need out of it.
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  So what we do then is we look at their to do list and we think about What are the emotions
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  that come up around these items for you?
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  And the emotions don't even have to make sense.
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  So for example, I was working with, you know, an executive that for whatever reason was just
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  stalling on getting his grocery shopping done.
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  Just couldn't do it.
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  Really silly.
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  Right?
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  He can do all these high powered things, but struggling with the groceries.
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  So we asked him, what are the emotions here on this?
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  And the first thing he said was this doesn't make any sense, but loneliness.
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  And then when we discovered that he'd been through a divorce, his ex wife used to do the
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  reshopping.
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  And so that errand was actually triggering emotion.
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  The
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  next step, the good news beyond just getting in touch with loneliness is then it can stimulate
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  you to take the right self care behaviors.
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  So what he did then was quite simple.
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  Just plan to cell phone catch up call with a buddy during grocery shopping.
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  So then he used that signal of that loneliness to stimulate him to get more social support
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  since that what he really needed after the divorce.
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  In terms of efficiency, platform, speed is excellent.
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  To have access to some financial tools like plastic, it's really helpful.
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  We've gotta go procure ingredients.
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  We gotta get them organic certified to produce the corrugate cardboard and the packaging
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  manufacturers gotta do a trial run, production run, and we've gotta start paying people fast.
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  And we need to pay them with cash or a wire and plastic comes in and fills that void for us.
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  So can you give me a example of one of your mental shortlist and what are some of the types
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  of mental shortlist that you typically help some of your clients with?
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  Sure.
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  Absolutely.
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  So another kind of hallmark of many high functioning people is that once we get
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  something in our minds, we can be a little bit like a dog with a bone.
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  We can be very tenacious, and that can be a blessing or a curse.
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  So, obviously, it's a blessing if, you know, say you're working on a big project, and it's
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  all you can think about.
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  You live it and breathe it, and that's great.
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  But then what about the day after the project?
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  And if your mind is just kind of auto tracking onto that project, but it's over.
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  And then people can feel like a sense of emptiness or maybe if you go through a breakup
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  and you just can't get that person out of your mind, what you need is a new mental shortlist.
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  So what we do is we create, say, 5 things that you know are going to be good, healthy ways for
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  you to spend your mental energy, whether that be going over your holiday shopping list,
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  starting to think in advance about those things or weekend plans or work projects, but the idea
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  is to come up with 5 things that you know are actually going to be good fruitful areas for
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  you to focus on.
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  I compare it kind of like having a fridge full of healthy snacks makes it easier to decline
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  the bag of chips that calling your name.
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  So it sounds really simple kind of in the moment to think of 5 things, but when the
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  thought monster strikes we can go completely mind blank unless we have that actual written
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  list of here are 5 other things to focus on.
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  It makes it a lot easier to stay off of ruminating when we have something good to pivot
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  on to.
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  Good idea.
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  Good idea.
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  Alright.
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  Well, what's what's worry time?
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  I mean, are you actually suggesting that people schedule worry time to worry instead of
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  working?
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  Well, I actually am because believe it or not, Melinda, it will make them more productive.
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  So while they are working and of having this, like, little nagging, worry voice in the back
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  of their mind, you know, thinking like, oh, well, have you done your last will and trust
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  yet?
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  Or, oh, when's the last time you've, you know, checked your roof or whatever.
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  All these little things that can just ping into our minds instead of just trying to either keep
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  them in our working memory or tell ourselves, oh, don't think about that.
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  Just focus on work.
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  The mind doesn't wanna really let it go because the mind knows that there is some kernel of
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  logic as to maybe it actually makes sense.
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  So what you do is you have a calendar event called wordy time.
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  Some people do it every day for 15 minutes Some people once a week for an hour, whatever's best
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  for you.
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  And then whenever those little, you know, kind of nagging things pop up, you just put them
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  into the calendar event details.
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  And then once at your appointed time, you sit down and you give those things your full
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  attention, when you're actually going to be much more effective on them, and then it really
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  clears the slate for you while you're trying to do other things outside of worry.
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  Time.
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  Interesting.
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  Interesting.
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  Alright.
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  You've sold me.
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  Where can I get a copy of your book?
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  Nervous energy.
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  Super easy, nervous energy book.com.
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  Alright.
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  Good stuff.
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  Is it also available on Amazon as well?
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  Is it available yet?
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  Yes.
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  We're burning it up on Amazon.
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  Preorders are super strong.
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  We've got sales going all over the globe, so it's everywhere.
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  Alright.
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  Good stuff.
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  Alright.
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  Well, thank you so much, doctor Chloe Carmichael.
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  Thank you all so much for joining me for this episode of the small business chat podcast.
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  If you want more information about how to start to grow a small business, head over to my blog,
• 10:37
  succeed at youroboss.com, and get more information.
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  Now the mission of small business chat is to end small business failure.
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  I'm Melinda Emerson, small business lady, your host, and I'll leave you with this.
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  You never lose in business.
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  Either you win or you learn.
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  God bless everybody.
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  Good night.
• 10:54
  Thank you for listening to the Small Biz Chat podcast with Melinda Emerson.
• 10:59
  For more resources and small business success strategies, visit succeed as your own boss.com.
• 11:06
  Subscribe to this podcast wherever you listen to podcasts and join us next Wednesday.