Latest / The Oreaganic Podcast / 59: The 3 Tiers of Gratitude & Why It’s the Key to Living a Happier, Healthier Life
Transcript
- 0:00SPEAKER_00: Hello my friends and welcome back to the podcast.
- 0:02SPEAKER_00: Wow, I have been on a ridiculous travel bender.
- 0:07SPEAKER_00: I guys, I was away from my house for literally 18 days.
- 0:12SPEAKER_00: Moment of silence.
- 0:13SPEAKER_00: Like first world problem 100%.
- 0:16SPEAKER_00: But holy crap, as a homebody, that that was a lot.
- 0:19SPEAKER_00: I'm not even that much of a homebody, but nonetheless, not the point whatsoever of this episode.
- 0:24SPEAKER_00: Today's episode, I'm talking about one of the most powerful practices that I have fostered to get me a to a much happier place in my life, and that is gratitude.
- 0:37SPEAKER_00: Gratitude is something that's very cheesy, I feel, to some people.
- 0:41SPEAKER_00: Like on the surface, it might seem like a oh my god, your mom just telling you to just be grateful, or you better be grateful that you have this, or I don't care how you feel, like have gratitude when you're in like the pits of despair.
- 0:55SPEAKER_00: That is not what we're going for today, and that's not advice that I would give you.
- 0:59SPEAKER_00: So we're gonna talk about real practical ways to involve gratitude in your life more easily, and how you can foster an attitude of being grateful and filter your brain to look for things to be grateful for rather than things to complain about.
- 1:16SPEAKER_00: Because once you make this pivot shift, I promise you your life gets five million times better.
- 1:20SPEAKER_00: So without further ado, let's get into it.
- 1:22SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the organic podcast.
- 1:24SPEAKER_00: I'm your host, Reagan, mechanical engineer, lifelong athlete, and recovered overachiever, here to empower you to pursue your highest potential and live freely as your happiest, most organic self.
- 1:35SPEAKER_00: Every week we'll dive into topics ranging from personal growth, mindset hacks, psychology, and a blend of science and spirituality to give you all the tools you need to stop living on autopilot and start creating a life of freedom, meaning, and fulfillment as your most organic self.
- 1:48SPEAKER_00: If you're ready to become the best person, as I said you guys, just complete personal note for two minutes, so you can skip ahead eight times if you really feel the need.
- 2:11SPEAKER_00: But the past, like the the first two and a half, three weeks of September.
- 2:18SPEAKER_00: Oh, oh my god, like I oh my god, I had one trip planned for this whole year, and then I had another trip added on to the tail end of that as part of a bachelorette, which obviously I was not gonna miss, and it was still very fun.
- 2:33SPEAKER_00: But that was like two back-to-back trips, and then immediately after that I had a work trip.
- 2:38SPEAKER_00: So I have just been recovering.
- 2:40SPEAKER_00: And if you listened to last last week's episode, I'm sorry if you just had to hear that again.
- 2:44SPEAKER_00: So I hope that you skipped eight times when I said this.
- 2:47SPEAKER_00: But oh my god, I've been recovering.
- 2:49SPEAKER_00: Like, holy crap, you guys, pulse check, still here, still alive.
- 2:52SPEAKER_00: Guess what?
- 2:53SPEAKER_00: Very grateful.
- 2:54SPEAKER_00: But oh my god, that was just goodness gracious me, that was just a lot.
- 2:59SPEAKER_00: A lot.
- 3:01SPEAKER_00: So, past that personal point, back in the day, in probably more college, I was that friend that my friends would kind of poke fun at me or kind of say things at me sarcastically, and they would say, like, oh my god, just be grateful, just be grateful, because I would always be saying things like, you know, obviously, like, don't speak meanly about other people, but also to like focus on gratitude, yes, like say something to be grateful for.
- 3:31SPEAKER_00: Like every time that we would have like a group meal or something, maybe not every time, but we'd have group meals with my friends, and I would say, like, okay, everyone has to say something that they're grateful for, and this was really the first practice that I would say was like the most notable thing for me, quote unquote, starting my personal development journey, I'll say, because I had seen I'd absorbed a lot of content about gratitude, sure, but I also just know how important it is to be grateful, and I saw how much of a difference it made in my life to focus on things that I was grateful for rather than things that I was stressed out about or anxious, worried, angry, upset, whatever you want to say.
- 4:13SPEAKER_00: That's not to say I was bypassing my emotions of anxiety or whatever it was just in place of gratitude.
- 4:20SPEAKER_00: Like I wasn't bypassing the emotions, but there is something to be said for the patterns that you inhibit like that you wire into your brain.
- 4:29SPEAKER_00: And when you are constantly talking about your problems and you are focused on your problems, and you are looking out for things that were so annoying, things to complain about, things to be worried about, your brain will continue looking for more of those things because you're wiring your reticular activating system in your brain to only filter in information that is more of the thing that you're looking for.
- 4:53SPEAKER_00: And this is why it's not bypassing, because this this exists, this kind of pathway of training your brain to look for things to complain about is real, and you can do it for anything in life, though.
- 5:04SPEAKER_00: So the other side of that is the fact that there at the same time as there are many things to complain about if you're looking for them, there are also so many things to be grateful for at the exact same time.
- 5:18SPEAKER_00: Like from a neutral perspective, taking all charged emotions away from it, these two things exist factually at the same time at once.
- 5:26SPEAKER_00: Like they are both there, they are both here in our real world.
- 5:30SPEAKER_00: You just have to look for them.
- 5:32SPEAKER_00: And the main pivot point that we have to make is actively choosing to look for things to be grateful for rather than looking for things to complain about or be upset about.
- 5:41SPEAKER_00: Because even just that distinction is going to impact what your brain's actively filtering in and deeming to be important.
- 5:49SPEAKER_00: And that's why it makes such a massive impact on your life when you start to focus on things to be grateful for, because you will start to see more of them.
- 5:57SPEAKER_00: And naturally, when you start to see and notice things to be grateful for, you will probably feel happier.
- 6:03SPEAKER_00: You will feel more appreciative, you will obviously feel more grateful for all of these little things in your life that have maybe always been there, or maybe don't seem like that big of a deal, but really do add a lot of joy or peace to your life that you don't get to actually appreciate or notice if you're constantly in this mode of oh my god, this was so annoying, and that's so annoying, and this is so stressful, and of course I have to do this, and of course I have to do that, and this person's a bitch, and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.
- 6:33SPEAKER_00: There are two sides to the story at all times, and we have the gift of being able to choose which side we want to focus on.
- 6:44SPEAKER_00: So, when we're looking for things to be more grateful for, I think that a lot of people feel almost performative sometimes when they're talking about gratitude, where it's like you're kind of just coming up with things, especially at the start.
- 6:58SPEAKER_00: Like you're not really someone who's ever listed out things to be grateful for.
- 7:01SPEAKER_00: You might feel a little bit performative, or you might just feel a little weird, like trying to think of things.
- 7:09SPEAKER_00: Because I'm sure many of us live lives where we are already incredibly blessed.
- 7:15SPEAKER_00: Let me know what time out.
- 7:16SPEAKER_00: Let me just give you like so many things to be grateful for that you might not even realize.
- 7:23SPEAKER_00: I'm just gonna share this perspective because I feel like it's gonna be impactful for someone.
- 7:27SPEAKER_00: Number one, it is a miracle to even be alive.
- 7:31SPEAKER_00: It is a gift to be alive, to have a living, breathing, healthy body that has a heart that's beating, where you are breathing without even having to think about it, that is strong and capable and can move, and is capable of holding all of your thoughts and your soul and your consciousness.
- 7:52SPEAKER_00: Like, it is such a gift to be able to even be alive and like physically here on earth, living right now.
- 8:02SPEAKER_00: Like the odds, I I do not have the numbers in front of me, believe it or not, but I have heard things before about how like the odds of you actually being conceived based off of like the sperm and the egg and just whatever odds of conception are so incredibly small, and it is nothing short of a miracle that you are here on earth right now, today.
- 8:25SPEAKER_00: Like it's it's truly nothing short of that.
- 8:27SPEAKER_00: So if you are ever struggling with something to with finding something to be grateful for, you can always start here.
- 8:35SPEAKER_00: Like just the fact that you are alive is a gift, even if you are going through something absolutely like indescribable, no matter what, if you are still alive, you still have that gift, and you are able to create something out of whatever experience it is that you are going through that can either help make your life feel better, it can make other people's lives better.
- 9:06SPEAKER_00: Like you are here for a reason, you are here for a purpose, and life is a gift.
- 9:11SPEAKER_00: So that is something to be incredibly grateful for no matter what, and that's a very good anchor to go back to because I think we all have an intrinsic part of us that recognizes how special it is to be alive, and we never really acknowledge it unless we have a situation where we're like a loved one passes, or we hear of a terrible story, or something like that, that kind of just reminds us that like life is short.
- 9:38SPEAKER_00: Being here is a gift, being here is a miracle, and appreciating that is something that can bring so much peace into our lives that helps us to just feel happy and more free and just abundant and just appreciative for being alive, even in the moments where it feels like everything might be going to shit.
- 9:57SPEAKER_00: And if things are feeling really good, then it could just amplify that feeling of like, wow, what a gracious gift to be alive.
- 10:04SPEAKER_00: But that's where we start with gratitude.
- 10:06SPEAKER_00: Like, just to be alive is a gift, and then we can add another layer to that where there are things that it's it's natural and normal for us to get accustomed to the lives that we have, like the lifestyles that we live.
- 10:19SPEAKER_00: No matter where we live in this world, it is normal for us to get used to our day-to-day lives and just the the resources available to us that we just have on a regular basis because naturally your brain is just meant to operate in homeostasis with like your natural state.
- 10:36SPEAKER_00: So you're always just gonna become acclimated to what you're most used to.
- 10:40SPEAKER_00: So that can kind of make it feel a little bit harder to find small details of your life more of like a novel thing to be grateful for, even if you you know like you are grateful to have running water, you're grateful to have clothes, like you're grateful to have food.
- 10:56SPEAKER_00: These are things that because they're so wired in as normal for many of us who are very blessed in this way, it can feel like something that we kind of forget to add on the list of things to be grateful for.
- 11:08SPEAKER_00: But I'd say the next layer of gratitude beyond just like being grateful to be alive are these small things.
- 11:14SPEAKER_00: Like, are your basic necessities cared for?
- 11:17SPEAKER_00: Do you have food?
- 11:18SPEAKER_00: Do you have clean water?
- 11:20SPEAKER_00: Do you have a home?
- 11:21SPEAKER_00: Do you have clothes?
- 11:22SPEAKER_00: Like, do you have people around you who love you, who care for you?
- 11:27SPEAKER_00: Like, do you have the money and the resources to support the kind of life that you want?
- 11:32SPEAKER_00: Or even do you just have the money just to pay for food and basic necessities in general?
- 11:37SPEAKER_00: And if not, do you have the people to support Naiva?
- 11:40SPEAKER_00: Oh my f Hey guys, my cat just caught a mouse because I had my back door open and I had this screen over it, and there was a mouse running like on the other side of the screen, but it's not like a fixed screen, hard to explain.
- 11:53SPEAKER_00: And she I I heard her move to snag something, and I was like, Okay, hopefully that was just a bug.
- 11:59SPEAKER_00: And then she runs into my living room, and I see that she has something, and I was like, Oh, oh wow, and then she fully then the mouse is like running across, and then she goes and grabs it with her mouth and brings it back under the couch, and I just had to get a broomstick out and basically chuck it outside, and now we're here.
- 12:19SPEAKER_00: And she is sniffing around for the mouse, she's very confused, and I feel bad because I just put her into a stress response because she's gonna be very confused as to where the mouse went, even though I tried to make it clear that I was bringing it back outside.
- 12:31SPEAKER_00: So, guest feature, Nyla.
- 12:33SPEAKER_00: What I was saying though is that to be appreciative for your basic needs is something that I think we can overlook a lot, but it is something that immediately brings me back to a state of gratitude, no matter what.
- 12:45SPEAKER_00: I was doing this a lot last week in moments of being very stressed out.
- 12:50SPEAKER_00: Very stressed out.
- 12:51SPEAKER_00: I was looking for the kind of bare minimum baseline things that I am genuinely really grateful to have.
- 12:57SPEAKER_00: Like, I'm grateful that I like my travels were all smooth.
- 13:02SPEAKER_00: I'm grateful that I get to do work that I enjoy.
- 13:05SPEAKER_00: I'm grateful that I have the money and the resources to be able to go on these trips and I I have the time to do this, and I have the PTO.
- 13:12SPEAKER_00: Like immediately pivoting to the bare basic minimum things that you can be grateful for is like the easiest life hack to be able to switch to a state of joy, peace, happiness easier.
- 13:25SPEAKER_00: Because I truly believe that you cannot be feeling like despair, hopelessness, anxiety, all of this stuff when you are focusing on feeling gratitude.
- 13:36SPEAKER_00: And again, that's not to say that we want to completely ignore our feelings.
- 13:40SPEAKER_00: We still want to have our emotions feel through them, etc.
- 13:44SPEAKER_00: But gratitude is just more of an option for relief and a way to kind of foster a strong practice in your life that anchors you into a state of joy and peace and happiness more frequently, which then leads to obviously, in my opinion, a higher quality of life.
- 14:02SPEAKER_00: So their basic minimum that you can be grateful for, besides just being alive.
- 14:06SPEAKER_00: As I said, food, water, shelter, money, family, friends, spending time outside when it's an absolutely gorgeous day out and you get to just breathe in the fresh air, or spend time walking outside, or spend time next to the ocean, in water, through a forest, wherever it may be, these basic things that are available to many of us, which is a very, very blessed thing, is something that can immediately just anchor you back into gratitude, as I said.
- 14:41SPEAKER_00: And the next layer beyond kind of the bare basic minimum things are kind of it's like it's like a third tier because it kind of requires you to have a perspective shift from everything is happening to me versus everything is happening for me, and this can particularly be applied to circumstances in life where obviously it doesn't really feel like things are working out, and it feels like it obviously things are happening to you, like, oh my god, you just want to kind of fall into a victim mentality.
- 15:12SPEAKER_00: This third layer of gratitude allows you to take those situations where maybe you want to go into a victimhood mode, and it allows you to transform them into this perspective of like all of this stuff is happening for my highest good.
- 15:28SPEAKER_00: Whatever is coming of this situation is going to be better than I could imagine.
- 15:32SPEAKER_00: There's a divine hand in this, like, there's a reason this is happening, and I can trust that even though things feel shaky right now or uncertain, or I thought that I really wanted this thing, I know and have trust in the fact that like I am grateful that it has happened because I have deep trust in myself to figure it out, and I have deep trust in the higher power that is guiding my life to be taking care of me throughout this process.
- 16:00SPEAKER_00: I think that's the main third layer of gratitude is shifting from victimhood mode and everything's happening to me, to this is for my best, highest good.
- 16:11SPEAKER_00: This will end me up in a better spot than where I am right now, and this is happening for me.
- 16:17SPEAKER_00: And mixing all of these together, gratitude in general, it just takes actively seeking out, looking for things to be grateful for.
- 16:26SPEAKER_00: And I tend to do this, especially if I'm having a rough day, or if things are feeling very overwhelming and stressful.
- 16:32SPEAKER_00: When I start to focus on the things that I'm grateful to have, or like I don't want to say how things could be worse because I feel like that's not an ideal perspective to have, or I also don't like jinxing things, so knock on wood there, but when I focus on things like I'm happy that I am warm right now, that I have a bed to sleep in, that I had a meal tonight, that I have had, you know, the ability to move my body today, or the ability to use my mind in a way that feels fulfilling to me for work or have a great conversation with someone, or the fact that it was a beautiful day out, or the fact that it was a cloudy day and it was rainy and it was cold, but that meant that I could have a cozy day inside.
- 17:16SPEAKER_00: Like, you see how gratitude is something that just takes like the smallest shift in perspective, and it really does not take that much effort for the amount of payoff that it gives you, and that's why it has been so impactful for me, and it's honestly a marker of like probably my biggest marker of growth, in my opinion, just reflecting on the past few years of my life and how I've evolved in you know post-grad adulthood world, where really focusing on the things to be grateful for just allows those things in my life to to amplify.
- 17:51SPEAKER_00: And where we focus our energy that grows.
- 17:55SPEAKER_00: I think it's Tony Robbins who has said, like where focus goes, energy flows.
- 18:00SPEAKER_00: And this goes back to my original point where if you're constantly focused on things to be annoyed about or complain about, gossip about, things that make you miserable, stressed out, anxious, make you feel like a victim, then you will just notice more of those things in your life because your brain will be filtering in more of those experiences and you are putting more energy to them.
- 18:22SPEAKER_00: You're you're adding, you're amplifying those things occurring in your life, or at least appearing to occur in your life more frequently because you're actively looking for those experiences on a subconscious level without you realizing it.
- 18:35SPEAKER_00: Versus when we actively put our energy towards gratitude and things to be grateful for and things we feel blessed to have, we naturally amplify the experience of feeling these emotions of happiness and gratitude and joy and peace and just just the sense of love and appreciation for life.
- 18:55SPEAKER_00: And I think that's why it can feel cheesy for some people because they will say, like, oh my god, like you're just a tree hugger who's like, I just love everything in life.
- 19:04SPEAKER_00: And yeah, you know what?
- 19:06SPEAKER_00: Maybe maybe you are a bit.
- 19:08SPEAKER_00: Like, maybe I am a bit of a tree hugger, but who cares?
- 19:11SPEAKER_00: I'd rather be a happy tree hugger that other people see as cringe rather than being someone who's miserable and just has nothing else to say about anyone else but negative things.
- 19:23SPEAKER_00: You know what I mean?
- 19:24SPEAKER_00: Like the people who judge you for being focusing on gratitude because they say it's like, I don't know, cheesy or like that sounds silly to just say like you, I don't know, basically saying you kind of sound like a Buddha or something.
- 19:36SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
- 19:37SPEAKER_00: I I hope you guys get the point that I'm making here.
- 19:39SPEAKER_00: Like, gratitude is not something to be embarrassed about or ashamed about or something that makes you cringe or cliche or weird.
- 19:46SPEAKER_00: Like, it is one of the most powerful practices that you can implement in your life to completely change your perspective on the world, and by factor of that, naturally amplify, as a byproduct of that, naturally amplify positive experiences in your life and give you more things to be grateful for.
- 20:04SPEAKER_00: Even if you have what is seen as like quote unquote the bare minimum, or you've lost everything, but you're still alive, like even just focusing on the gratitude for what you have will then give you more reasons and like more things to be grateful for.
- 20:21SPEAKER_00: It's like an energy thing, and we can go into that maybe in another episode, but what you focus on expands, and we get to choose what we actually decide is important in our lives, which then allows our brain to filter in more of that information and amplify the experiences that we wish to have.
- 20:39SPEAKER_00: So if you wish to be a victim mindset kind of complaining, gossiping 24-7, miserable, like ignorant human, go go for it.
- 20:52SPEAKER_00: Go for it, pop off.
- 20:54SPEAKER_00: But if you want to be a happy, grateful, positive human being who can help make your life better and like actually put effort into change your life to have a different experience than what you have right now, then you 100% have the means to do so.
- 21:10SPEAKER_00: And gratitude is one of the most powerful ways to get you there.
- 21:13SPEAKER_00: So I hope this episode gave you guys some perspective on gratitude and ways to implement it in your life.
- 21:18SPEAKER_00: Because as I've said, it is truly such an amplification, like it's it's such an implication thing.
- 21:24SPEAKER_00: Like it can only bring more positive things into your life to focus on it more.
- 21:29SPEAKER_00: And I it I promise you, like, it will bring you so much more peace.
- 21:33SPEAKER_00: Like, so much more peace.
- 21:34SPEAKER_00: Every day, finding at least a few things to be grateful for, even better if you're like writing them in a journal every night, because then you're like physically writing them out on paper and like seeing them with your own eyes, like in words, things to be grateful for.
- 21:47SPEAKER_00: You I it just it makes your life so much better, guys.
- 21:49SPEAKER_00: It makes your life so much better, it gives you more positive energy that you can then put out into the world.
- 21:55SPEAKER_00: And all in all, cheesy as it sounds, makes the world a better place.
- 22:00SPEAKER_00: So I hope you guys enjoyed this episode.
- 22:02SPEAKER_00: Thank you for being here, and as always, go be your most organic selves, and I will see you in the next one.