Latest / Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps / Phone Tap: Roast Beef Massagewich

Transcript

Phone Tap: Roast Beef Massagewich · Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: If you're working at a busy restaurant during the lunch rush,
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: you know how stressful that can be, taking orders, making food,
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: trying to stay organized. And then imagine, on top of
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: all of that, you received one of the strangest phone
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: calls ever from a customer who wants to order a
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: sandwich but has taken his sweet, sweet old time. There's
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: a good reason for it, though, you're gonna hear in
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: your phone tap.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: Right now, Deli, this is Nick. Hello, Hi, Sorry?
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: Is this the deli?
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: Yes, this is Nick. How can I help you?
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, i'd like the places an order for a sandwich?
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: S Are you okay? Everything okay? Over there?
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: Oh so okay, excuse me.
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: What's going on? Sorry?
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: I bought one of those vibrating massage chairs from Sharper Image.
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: Oh I've been at it in the last seventeen hours.
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: That sounds like a lot.
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: That's good.
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so your your sandwich order?
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just question. After my order? Can you can
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: you put in the notes to come into the house
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: and deliver it to my lab.
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: And you wanted to deliver aware.
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: Onto my lap.
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: I don't know about that. I just don't want to
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: get up you can at your front doors. As far
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: as the I don't.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: Want to stand. It feels so good.
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: I'm that I'm bet. Did you put the order in
• 2:01
  Speaker 2: or what? My friend?
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, sandwich?
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: We've got a lot of sandwiches. You want to think
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: specific on it?
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: I no, I don't even care.
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: Okay, how about a ham and twist?
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: Not that one?
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: Listen, man, I'm busy right now. I can't pick the
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: sandwich for you. Why don't you call back when you're
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: ready to order?
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: Do you have a roast beer?
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: Yes, we have roast beef. You want a roasty sandwich? Yea?
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: What kind of bread?
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: Sour dough?
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, sir? I'm you know. I'm trying to help
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: you out disorder. This is pretty creepy, to be honest
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: with you, and you're in So if we could get
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: disorder put in, I appreciate it.
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: I'm just trying to tell you.
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: Why Why don't you turn off the chair while you're ordering? No?
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: What are you crazy? Have you've been in a massage
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: chair before?
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah? I didn't. I wasn't in it for seventeen hours.
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: I don't think that's even help me.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: You're missing out. I'm I'm I'm I'm wearing a diaper
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: right now?
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: Why you would you be wearing a diaper? Sure?
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: I want to stand up, all right.
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: I should have asked that. I what I was thinking.
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: I can have the sandwich deliver to you. But that's uh,
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: that's about it. That's that's all I need to know
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: from her, and just what you want on the sandwich.
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: Okay, okay, sorry, what.
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna send you a roast beef sandwich? All right?
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: Just give me your address. I'm not knowing delivering it
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: to your labs.
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: Do you have any anybody over there that could pick
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: up my kids from soccer camp? Didn't?
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: No? Go listen guy, we're up, yell, I gotta go.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: Okay, I'll pay your delivery guy to pick up my
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: kids for me.
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: Sir, with all due respect, you need to get out
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: of your freaking chair and go pick up your kids.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: You can't have the Delhi guy to pick up your kids.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: I'm willing to pay extra.
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: No DELI turn off the chair, walk outside the house
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: and pick up your kids. I'll have the sandwich to
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: you in a half hour.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: I feel like a human urrito you can wrapped in
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: a tortilla of relaxation.
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: You. You wasted my time. I'm not having this conversation
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: with you. I'm hanging up.
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: No, this is the call your roommate Ryan wanted me
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: to have with you.
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: What the hell you talking about? Man?
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Ryan loves some massage chairs and brank phone calls.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: This is a oh yeah, because this is a prank call.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: Are you kidding me?
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: I'm not in a massage chair, metal radio station. My
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: name is jeff from Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: You just got phone tap, dude.
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: I gotta say I'm pretty relieved that I'm not talking
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: to a weirdo.
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: Yes, I felt pretty good for those last few minutes.
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: But your roommate Ryan emailed us and said, you just
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: started this new job at the Delhi and you wanted
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: to make your first week more exciting.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, I don't even know how you are
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: making no sounds like I don't know if you're in
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: a massage chair.
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: Well you sound stirs, dude. You I don't like it.
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: The week of every morning was funk taps weekday mornings
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: on the twenties Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning