Latest / Free Therapy with Ben & Kevin / My experience at grief camp for kids | Bonus Episode #19

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My experience at grief camp for kids | Bonus Episode #19 · Free Therapy with Ben & Kevin

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: The world needs free therapy.
• 0:02
  Speaker 2: Hello, it's Ben. How's everyone doing? Kev's not with me
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: right now. This is a special episode. We've never really
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: done this before, but today's National Grief Day. And it
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: just so happens that a couple of weeks ago, I
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: was volunteering at Experience Camps, a camp where kids who've
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: lost a loved one go and spend a week. And
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: a lot of people volunteer. I've been volunteering there. And
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: so I sat down with Kev to kind of share
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: it with him. It was a very raw and honest
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: conversation right when I got back. I sat down with him.
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: I recorded it. And yeah, I wanted to share it
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: with everybody. We did an episode a month ago or
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: two months ago with Claire Bidwell-Smith, a grief therapist, and
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: it was our highest performing episode. And when I lost
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: my dad, grief really hit me in a way that
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: I wasn't expecting. I think a lot of people can
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: relate to that. And I found a lot of comfort
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: in exploring these feelings. And so I wanted to share
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: it with everybody. And yeah, enjoy the AE bonus episode. Benny,
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: welcome back. Hey, buddy. You had a week. I had
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: a week. I wanted to talk to you about it,
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: but on the podcast. You don't even know what happened
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: this past week. We barely talked. I was away this
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: whole entire week. I was away at this something called
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: Experience Camps. We talked about it a little on the
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: grief episode, but Experience Camps is really just where young
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: kids between the ages of 10 and 18, 9 and
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: 18 have lost someone they love, a parent, a sibling,
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: a grandparent, someone that just was transformative in their life
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: and It's free. It's a nonprofit organization. Isn't that crazy?
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: And like the adults volunteer.
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: So like 190 kids, 98 kids, 50 counselors. We give
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: up like an entire week. Right. So I just got back.
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: It was my second year there. You know, I've never
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: cried so much and had so much fun in the
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: same week. Like I was trying to count the days
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: that I cried. I cried Monday, Tuesday, Thursday. Thursday, Saturday.
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: And like my Thursday cry was like a cry that
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: I haven't cried in over a year. It's like, and
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: I guess like for just context, it's been around for
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: a long time. It's a bunch of different States. And
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: these kids look forward to it every single year. It's
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: the one place they feel like they're not alone. These
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: kids like share things. Like I told my friend, they
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: don't get it. When I come here, it's like the
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: one place I can talk about it. And, You know,
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: we play games, we do activities, and every single day
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: there's like a sharing circle led by a grief specialist.
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: And it's like group therapy, right? And it's very like
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: sacred in what people talk about. But it's very catered
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: towards young kids. It's like, okay, who do you want
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: to share? So it's like day one, these kids go
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: in there and they're like, I lost my ex. This
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: is how it happened. And you get time. And then
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: like grief therapist goes, are you open to questions? And
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: I had 15-year-olds this year.
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: So you were with the 15-year-olds.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: So last year I had like nine-year-olds, 10-year-olds. It was
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: like really sweet, but it was more like parenting and
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: watching them. And the 15-year-olds actually like, there's a sense
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: of like them needing some guidance. And the crazy part
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: is like more than half lost their dads. Like six
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: of the eight lost their dads. And for me, that
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: was like- Your group is that small? Yeah, eight kids. Yeah.
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: Each group is like between six and 10. Yeah. And
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: there's 90 kids. And so I guess the crazy part
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: is like I sleep in bunks with them. Like I
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: never did sleep away camp. I'm like sleeping in a bunk,
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: on a bottom bunk with eight kids. And I'm like,
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: I have like the most sleep OCD ever, but I
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: would do it a hundred times over because that anxiety
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: doesn't exist there. I'm like so fulfilled. I woke up
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: this morning and I journaled and I just was like
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: crying so much because I was so sad that it
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: was over. Like I walked in the room this morning
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: and I hugged you and just cried for like 15
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: seconds because- Like I'm sad that it's over, but I'm
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: also just so in awe at how fulfilled I feel.
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: Like I was talking to this counselor, LJ, he's so cool.
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: He's been there for like 11 years. He lost his
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: mom and his dad, you know, and he's just like
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: such a giving guy. And we were talking about it.
• 4:18
  Speaker 2: We're like, it's crazy how coming to this camp as
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: a counselor is the most selfish thing you can do.
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: Yet it is more selfless than it is selfish. But
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: it is selfish. Like I go there to heal and
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: to give back and to like help these kids. And
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: what's amazing for me is like the depths of that
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: pain is what pushes me to give them joy because
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: their pain, I believe, is still greater than mine. I
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: still believe the pain these kids feel is something that's
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: impossible to explain. Because if you're 13 or 14 years
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: old and you have a house with brothers, all of
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: a sudden your dad dies. Your life is, you're gutted.
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: Like imagine losing your parents. Like you can't comprehend it.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: And so you have that in your head at all times.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: And so like every day that I'm just like physically exhausted,
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: it's 24 seven. You're watching them 24 seven. I'm exhausted.
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, wait, whenever I don't have more to give,
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: I just give more. And I just keep giving and
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: giving and giving. And it's like, I didn't have anything
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: left on like Thursday.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm exhausted.
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: And there was something in me was able to find more.
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: And that feeling of giving it my all, like really
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: giving it my all, it's kind of something that I
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: wish I had in like my life today. Like, I
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: don't know, like obviously I give this podcast so much
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: effort in my relationships, but like it's different there. Why
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: were you so emotional during, but even today coming out
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: of it?
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: I feel so bad for these kids. The things they
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: share are like so heartbreaking. It's so unfair for them.
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: Some kids have found their parents dead. So it's like,
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: you know, It's going to be hard for those kids
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: to recover. A lot of them have mental health problems
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: at like 12 and 13 and 14. And I just
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: have so much empathy for them. And I want them
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: to like be better. I don't want them to suffer.
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: You know, like.
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: One of these kids was like, let me go in
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: a circle. What's one thing you're worried about? And he's like,
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: what's going to happen to me later in life? Hmm.
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: because you can just see their pain and just see
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: how much you're shutting down, acting out, but like desperate
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: for connection. And then that same kid three days later
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: was like, I didn't want to come to camp this year,
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: but now I feel really hopeful in three days. So
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: like you see the growth of these kids and you're
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: just like, I can't explain the meaning I feel because
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: my life today, like it's a great life. I have
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: so much to do. grateful for, but like when you're there,
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: there's no phones, there's nothing all you're just committed to
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: giving these kids everything. And I, I want, you know, yeah,
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: I just like really, really, really care about those kids. Um,
• 7:57
  Speaker 2: and you know, I don't know the impact I'm going
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: to have on their life down the road. Right. I
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: don't know if they're going to come back to camp.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: but I have an inkling that those six days will
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: make their lives better. And knowing that like, I didn't
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: want to go back. I have a hard time giving
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: myself in the sense of like being uncomfortable sometimes, but
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: knowing that I pushed myself that way. And for every
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: counselor that like gives everything up to go there, I
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: admire all the counselors so much. Like they are like, they're.
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: Such good people right like 50 of these people give
• 8:50
  Speaker 3: up their entire lives for a whole week full-time jobs
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  Speaker 3: but people have kids too i have a friend who
• 8:56
  Speaker 3: was a two-year-old kid and a kid on the way
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  Speaker 3: he's a full-time job and he gives up a week
• 9:02
  Speaker 3: of his life.
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  Speaker 2: And so it's just like It's really inspiring to be
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: around those people. And we just, we give it 120%
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: and we talk about death and sadness every day, all
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: the time. Yet we throw something called Camp Chella and
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: we dance, right? And we do a casino night and
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: we're gambling at night, right? Like, you're like, yo, Blackjack,
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: you're teaching the kids how to deal and shuffle at night.
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: And then you're like playing Texas Hold'em and they want
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: to beat you. And you're like, no, I'm not gonna
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: let you win. Like, come on, dude. Like, you're like,
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: you're like playing with them and My bunk, bunk eight,
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna like brag about them. So our name was
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: like El Ocho. And at the end of the day,
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: they gave us like these hats. I'm just gonna wear it.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: Go-kart guy.
• 9:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: Yo, they were talking smack. We rode go-karts. And the
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: three kids were like talking smack. And this is what
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: they said. I have a question for you. What weighs more?
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: Five pounds of feathers or five pounds of bricks?
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: They weigh the same.
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: They weigh the same. And I said the scale because
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: it weighs 10 pounds. But they were like using that
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: to like rage bait everyone the whole entire camp. So
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: my bunk was super cool. They've been together for five years.
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: They come together every year. I was like, do you
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: guys talk outside of it? They're like, no, the kids. Yeah.
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: Every year they've been coming.
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: All eight, seven of the eight. They all come together
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: every year, but do they, they don't know each other outside.
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: They just, and they're like boys. They got weird dynamics.
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: They want to goof around. Like, can we please like
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: all sleep on the floor? Like, they're just like boys.
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: And there's like tension here and there, but like, they're like,
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: vulnerable with each other after our uh we do this
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: thing at the end called like the last sharing circle
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: where the entire camp gets up and shares one share
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: something about just what happened one kid goes to the
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: other kid he goes do you remember the last thing
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: you said to your mom whoa yeah and they're just
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: like opening up to each other and it's like you
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: know that the impact the camp did that right like
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: these grief counselors oh my god this guy this guy's
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: name michael benjamin Crazy, right? He's like our senior grief specialist.
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: He was with our bunk. He leads the bunk every
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: single day. And he cultivates these conversations and just allows
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: them to open up and knows how to pull it out.
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: And you know all the work that he's doing is
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: really affecting them. There was one day, it was like
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: the day that will really sit with me. we do
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: a day of coping skills for two hours, two different rooms.
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: What are coping skills? How do we do it? Cause
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: you know, anger, whatever. And we all wrote letters, how
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: we were feeling to our, to about how we're feeling today.
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: You can write a letter to yourself. You can write
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: a letter to your, your parent. You can do anything.
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: And it's all on paper that dissolves and you dissolve
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: the paper in the water after you read it. And
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: I was like, I guess I'll give it a go.
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: I've never written my dad a letter. So I wrote
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: my dad a letter, um, And a couple of kids
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: were goofing off. They saw me write the letter and
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: they started to write letters. And I was writing my
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: letter and I completely lost it. I was uncontrollably crying.
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: Like big tears. My body was shaking. I had to
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: walk out of the room. And like one of the
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: kids saw me walk out of the room. Follows me
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: out of the room. Comes to me and hugs me.
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: Just hugs me. Fuck you. And I'm like, oh, my God,
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: you are incredible.
• 12:50
  Speaker 3: That's so cute.
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: And then I get back, and the other kid who
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: was sitting there is reading my letter. Oh, my God.
• 12:56
  Speaker 2: I'm not going to say, don't read my letter. Oh,
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: my God.
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: He was curious.
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: He starts reading, and he goes, Ben, that's a beautiful letter.
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: And he starts writing his letter, and he breaks down.
• 13:06
  Speaker 2: He's crying so much, uncontrollably crying. And I was like,
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: I'm here for you. I was like, do you mind
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: if I read it? He's like, yeah, you can read it.
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: He goes, dear dad, you know, I used to be
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: really sad that you weren't here and that sadness is gone.
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: But I'm realizing now that I'm just jealous that all
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: of my friends are going to have their parents when
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: they're 20, 30 and 40. I'm not going to have you.
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: I'm really jealous and sad. I'm really jealous and angry.
• 13:36
  Speaker 2: And I didn't know I was feeling that. And that
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: kid was like all day was just crying. And so
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: I'm just like. The profound impact of those moments will
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: sit with me.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: What do you feel like you learned about grief?
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: I think one of the biggest takeaways from this experience
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: was the more pain you can get in touch with,
• 14:02
  Speaker 2: the more joy you can give. Because that day, it
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: was painful that my dad wasn't here. And I was sad.
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: But I think... It was why I was able to
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: give so much joy. Some kid said, you know, grief
• 14:21
  Speaker 2: isn't just seven stages. I think it's like a thousand.
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: I think you just like go in between them all
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: the time and sometimes you're above one, sometimes you're below one.
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: He goes, I don't think there's just seven because I
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: think everyone is unique. 13 years old, 13 year old.
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: And I think grief is like the one thing that
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: everyone experiences yet they don't talk about. And I think
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: if more people just talked about grief, it would be
• 14:40
  Speaker 2: the most common unifying experience of this world. If we
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: just sat there and every day, yeah, who did you lose?
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: How did you lose them? What are you afraid of?
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: It would unify us in a way that we're not
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: really doing today. And so I hope that like people
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: just think about it. And one of the craziest things
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: we all talked about at camp was the amount of
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: dads that died at this camp. One, I think moms
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: are aware of the camp and they're more socially. So
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: they like send their sons back.
• 15:05
  Speaker 3: Right?
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: Moms. But dads are busy doing shit. They don't send
• 15:08
  Speaker 2: their sons. Right? So dads really, I mean, like, dads should, like,
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: see this. Like, every dad watching this, please, like, if
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: you lost your wife or your partner, like, get your
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: kid to this camp. Right. It's so important. But a
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: lot of dads aren't there. And, like, two of the
• 15:20
  Speaker 2: main causes of dad's death. One, colon cancer. I have
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: never heard so many dads die of colon cancer. So, like,
• 15:28
  Speaker 2: go get a colonoscopy. I'm not, like, there's daddy here. Like,
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: go do it if you're a guy. The second thing
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: was the amount of dads that committed suicide. I mean,
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: it was above and beyond the number one death of parents.
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: Suicide.
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: So I love these kids so much. We're called El Ocho.
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: The last, we had a talent show. And the first year,
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: you know what they did? Bunk Street Boys. But they
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: didn't want to do it this year. They wanted to
• 15:54
  Speaker 2: do a remix. I was like really trying. I was like,
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: I'll do it. Like, no, we're not doing the Bunk
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: Street Boys. I'm like, no, I like boy bands. Like, no.
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: And like by day three, I was like, I have
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: an idea. They were listening to Big Papa every single day.
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: I love it when you call me Big Papa. And
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: they were like this. I was like, we can't perform
• 16:08
  Speaker 2: that in camp. Like, it's not appropriate. So I was like,
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: what if we do this and then we transition? Like,
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: what do you mean? So this was my idea. I
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: get them in like handkerchiefs. We had like that go
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: below their eyes. They walk out super hard. I love
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: it when you call me Big Papa. Then I had
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: one of the kids go, no, no, guys, guys, stop.
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: We can't play this song. We're going to get in
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: trouble at camp. And then he goes, yo, DJ. play
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: our favorite song. And it stops and it goes. Making
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: my way downtown, walking fast, faces fat. And the whole
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: camp started singing A Thousand Miles by Vanessa Carlton. And
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: they loved it. I was like a proud dad. I
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: was like, yeah. And then at the end, the counselors
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: jumped up and were like, yeah. And it was like
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: a theme. There's like chants and cheers during lunch. After lunch,
• 17:02
  Speaker 2: like we're in the cafeteria eating, the food's incredible. And
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: a song comes on and it's Benson Boone. It's like,
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: what's that song? So what's the big one? It's like playing,
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: the kids are there and I'm like, fuck this. I
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: stood on the chair at the entire camp.
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: And I was like, these beautiful things that I got.
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: And the kids were like, yeah. And the kids go, yeah.
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: The entire camp gets on the chairs. Oh my God.
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: Oh my God. Okay, real quick. I used Seth's line.
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: about vulnerability. So we're in this circle. And I said
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: in this circle, literally verbatim, Seth Menachem, you, I said,
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: I was like, I'm so proud after the reading letters,
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: I was like, I'm so proud of every single kid
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: here because it is much harder to open up than
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: it is to stay closed. You guys are strong men
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: by crying here. And I want you to know that
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: this is real strength because holding it.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: In is easier.
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: And I was like, shit that I learned on this
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: fucking podcast, I am sharing to these kids. And dude,
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: one of the counselors wrote me a note and said,
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: when you said that, that changed everything for me. So
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: like in real time. And the best part, dude, is
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: like these counselors are so fucking cool. I love them
• 18:19
  Speaker 2: so much. 10 of them ran. I met them for
• 18:23
  Speaker 2: two days last year. We're like, yo, I really like
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: your podcast. Oh, cool. What you guys are doing is awesome.
• 18:29
  Speaker 2: The sex episode was so interesting. The one about, um, uh,
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: making male friends, this 24 year old, 27 year olds,
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: 30 year old, like they're listening. And I don't know,
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: I know them now better, but they're like, it's interesting.
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: This is needed. The, the, the, the guy grief counselors
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: are like, wow. Like they're like, this is exactly what
• 18:47
  Speaker 2: we need to be doing. It was like so much
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: validation for me and you. Like I want, I really
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: need you to hear this dude. Like I've really fucking
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: need you to listen to me. Like if we were
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: on the podcast, I would, I would grab you right
• 18:58
  Speaker 2: now and be like, I'm not fucking around right now. Like, Yes,
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: this podcast hasn't blown it up, but yes, we haven't
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: found a big audience yet. I know we're trying to
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: figure out. I am telling you, dude, this is so needed.
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: When people discover this, I promise you it's going to
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: change people's lives. I don't know these people, Vancouver, Midwest.
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: They're just normal people living normal lives like us. They
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: feel seen by listening to this. Like we're on the
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: right path. I'm telling you, like, We're going to, I
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: really want to fucking change people's lives. So that's all
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: I got. I fucking love you. I don't know what
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: else to say. I love that.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: It was beautiful.
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: And the biggest thing I'll tell the counselors right now,
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: if you guys don't know this, you have to start
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: taking shits in Hayford hall. Do not take a dump
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: in any other bathroom because taking a, taking a shit
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: in Hayford hall is elite. Anyways, I love the counselors.
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: I love you guys. I'm just like, so grateful for
• 19:54
  Speaker 2: experience camps. Please go to experience camps, go online, just
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: like look them up. You don't have to donate. Just
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: consider volunteering. There's a guy's camp. There's a girl's camp.
• 20:03
  Speaker 2: There's all over the country. Our friend Grant, who we
• 20:07
  Speaker 2: talked about it just did in Georgia. Like You know, like,
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: even if you don't want to go, think about it.
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: And if you really don't like it, you can just leave. Like,
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: you're not mandated to be there. But, like, if you've
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: lost a sibling or a grandparent and you're just like,
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: what would it be like? Just consider doing it. You know,
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: this is the most meaning I have felt in my
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: adult life so far. Like, yes, cancer and giving back
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: and talking was cool. Like, that was a piece of
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: my life then. But, like, the impact here. Yeah. Thanks, bro.
• 20:36
  Speaker 3: Love you.
• 20:37
  Speaker 2: So beautiful.
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: Hey, thanks for listening. We appreciate you. If you enjoyed
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: this episode and us embarrassing ourselves and talking about our feelings,
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: you are definitely going to like everything else. Follow along
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: on Instagram at freetherapy and we'll see you next time.