Latest / Around the Kinky Kampfire Podcast / EP 42 | Geeky Pins and Pronouns A Look at Lifestyle Diversity in the Convention Circuit

Transcript

EP 42 | Geeky Pins and Pronouns A Look at Lifestyle Diversity in the Convention Circuit · Around the Kinky Kampfire Podcast

• 0:47
  Speaker 1: Good to go.
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: Alright, officially starting this is bonfire is kinky, Really.
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: The fire, the roof is on fire.
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: I can't wait for you to actually record the one out Fire.
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: That's recorded.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: I don't have to go through this anymore.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: There's going to be multiple takes.
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we're just going to jump right into it.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're going to like this now.
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: No, we got to do this part.
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: No, we don't.
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: This is the funny part, as you heard in the intro blah, blah, blah.
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I can eat shmack.
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: Okay, this is around the kinky campfire.
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: I'm keeping all that extra bit in there a little bit.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: You're going to condense it down, but it's going to be there during the song.
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: This is the podcast Campfire with a K.
• 1:38
  Speaker 2: Every second and fourth Fridays of the month, we have new episodes on all the modern platforms.
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: We are non monogamous kink BDSM education through awareness.
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: We are not official, we are not certified, but we share our experiences that we have in the lifestyle.
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: Bring them out to you.
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: That way, you're aware that people have these experiences and thoughts and feelings and opinions and that they're out there.
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: One of us is actually an educator in the space.
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: The other one is very entertaining.
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: I'll let you decide who's who, but we are here to destigmatize the taboo.
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: There's stuff that goes on and there's different platforms that like to ban and limit and censor people, but we're trying to make it more common, so it is not that anymore.
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: So, with all that said, I think that's the official stuff going on.
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: Join us on Instagram campfire kinksters with a K.
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: A lot of people forget the K.
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: Some people spell it without the K, but it's around the kinky campfire with a K and campfire kinksters with a K.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: Okay, officially trying to shore up the intro there.
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: One of these days we'll have an official introduction so you guys can skip this part and we can jump right in.
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: But before we do anything else in this episode, we have our favorite minute.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: No, we don't.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: We have our favorite minute.
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: We really don't.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: What is it?
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: you are drinking there, person that hasn't given their introduction I am.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: Who are you and what are you drinking?
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: This is Rue, and I am drinking hot tea because my sinuses are kicking my ass.
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: Yes, we live in the southern part of the United States where, apparently, the weather likes to do whatever the fuck it wants and go up and down, which is ridiculous, and I'm so tired of this right now because this is my third little outbreak whatever you want to call it where I can't breathe, three times in like six months October.
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: Whenever it started going up and down, it was like since October, I've done this three times now.
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: Like people are like, it's definitely not fun.
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like can you breathe?
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: I'm like no, I can't breathe, yeah, it's not working, whatever.
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: But I, before I talk about what I'm drinking, my name is Gently McFluffin Stuff.
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: That is my official name.
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: Wow, gently McFluffin Stuff, or you can call me I can just call you Fluffer.
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: Fluffer, I'm the Fluffer, I'm totally fine with that.
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: Oh God, people just paid me.
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: Or just Julius, hh, julius, if you want to go the official routes.
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: But I am drinking tea as well, not because I need to breathe, because I'm just not.
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: I'm not used to breathing, I don't breathe pretty much anytime.
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: I just like tea Gives a little caffeine and also not sponsored.
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: I forgot what the tea name is Some great value, it's great value.
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: Oh, I got great value green tea.
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: People hate on the great value, but it's okay and there's a lot of different things.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like I've gotten barbecue chicken pizza and chicken and bacon ranch pizza great value, and it's fucking good.
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: Not sponsored, but I will whore myself out for some great value If you want to sponsor great value.
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: I'm here because I eat all your stuff, but I'm also drinking like Sam's Club brand caffeine water.
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, not sponsored, but we would like that very much.
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no screwball today, huh.
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: No, no, I took a Sudafed so I can't.
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: What does that mean?
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: I can't mix the two.
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: I'm from Ohio.
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: We do all that stuff, we do, we just do all that stuff.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: No, no.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: You're real.
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: Floridian, you just do it all and just go drive home afterwards.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: No, not happening.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: We don't endorse drinking and driving, but we just it's a thing.
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: Okay, so ready.
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: I'm not Ready.
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: It's a favorite minute Capsters.
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: Here you go.
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: It's going to start in three, two.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: I really wish we could just change this section.
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: Rua's officially taken off her headset.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: Well, I mean, you have to sign this headache and then add that shit on top of it.
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: That's the ASMR minute, oh my.
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: God, that part's not going to get cut out.
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: Just think you have no warmup now You're going to go straight into that I'd rather go straight into it than we had.
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: Okay, that's it.
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: Introduce yourself and then tell you what you're drinking, and we're going to just go and jump right into it.
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: We're just going to jump right in.
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: Okay, so I'm officially saying it now We'll still keep the ASMR minute, even though I got cut short there because somebody didn't want to listen in and participate.
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: But I'm going to record an actual introduction Fancy, quote, unquote, fancy.
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: So we can skip that extra bit at the beginning, so you all can just.
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: I mean doesn't really change what you all are hearing pretty much, but we just going to jump right into it.
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: So what are we talking about today?
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: With the official, formal stuff out of the way, okay, we went to a convention that you guys heard about, that we were going to before.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: We did.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: We went to a podcast convention.
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: It's 2024, orlando, florida, we can get there.
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: But basically for the podcast listeners you guys listen to a bunch of podcasts because I do my stats there.
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: Podcast listeners listen to other podcasts, so it was nice going out there and putting a face to the name to some of the podcasts that we listen to, getting to meet those people and collaborate Hopefully you will hear us and them on here and their stuff more often, I don't know Trying to reach out to people and see what's going on If they want to collaborate, I'm totally down for it.
• 7:28
  Speaker 2: So I would just start naming out podcasts because they're public but we haven't officially gotten any kind of working thing going, so I'm not going to just start naming random people.
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: But if you go into the podcast convention site, a lot of the speakers have podcasts and are podcast adjacent.
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: The biggest thing I thought was interesting was there's a lot of people that don't have podcasts but they were there, like sound engineers and just like, but they had voiceover actors.
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: That too yeah.
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: And then people that just kind of taught classes, creative classes and stuff like that.
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: They were just there.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: Some of them were volunteering.
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: It was very techy too.
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: There were people that know all the techy stuff that goes behind.
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: A lot of the bigger podcasts.
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: Yes, and I also found a couple of studios that will do the video and the audio and the editing here in Orlando.
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: So if you In the center of Florida area we can get to them.
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: So if you hear any kind of specific upgrades, that could be why Just got to procure the resources for that.
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: But that had me very excited.
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, we have stuff here in central Florida.
• 8:42
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God, we have official stuff and some of the people that we've listened to are also here close to us so we can go out and see them and hopefully we'll go to the same events and everything like that.
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: I know my biggest thing I think we kind of talked about that is educating the different groups, so to make it not scary to go to the BDASM and Kink events, but also for the BDASM and Kink people to go to the other lifestyle groups, just like swingers in general, I don't know nudists or whatever like that, because we've talked about it before.
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: But there's certain rules that are not the same for every group.
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: Well, each subculture has their own norms.
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: Yes, and so I like to educate the people so that it's not as scary, because I still see it all the time.
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: It's like I want to go but I have nobody to go with.
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: What do I do there?
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: That's still a question all the time.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: And us Kinksters and Lifestylers and BDSM Lifestylers, I should say, because everybody has a lifestyle, but we have a it's like not scared.
• 9:49
  Speaker 2: Scared is not the right word, but that's the one I'm going to use.
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: Tentative.
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: Tentative to go to check these places out and I understand if you are a smaller frame person.
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: Going to places by yourself can be scary, but hopefully you will go out to the public events.
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: Well, no, just an inexperienced person.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: It doesn't matter your frame or your body size, none of that matters.
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: Maybe you could be the biggest dude in the world, and going to an unknown place for the first time, where you don't know anybody, can be intimidating.
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: Well, I'm just saying the smaller frame.
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: It's actually a thing too, like physically depending on what area you live in.
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: I can understand not wanting to go by yourself because it just could be in a bad area, like I just know, if I wasn't as imposing and I'll use my actual stature to myself, there's some places I wouldn't go because I'm like this looks sketchy and even I'll say I'll look it, I'll go in anywhere.
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: And in the quote unquote hood.
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: Are you kidding me?
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: I used to be the token white kid that got busted into the hood to go to school.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: So, no, I'll go out.
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: I went to an HBC.
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: I mean that.
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: I mean so, no, I'm not intimidated to go anywhere.
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: I spent my 19th birthday with the Hells Angels, so I mean like, no, I'll go, I'll walk into any room.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: That doesn't, that doesn't faze me.
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, not everybody feels that way, and even for me and I I understand that.
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: I know that that my view can be unique in that, in that perspective, but not.
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: But however, you know it doesn't have to be that scary.
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: There's things that the community has put into place to help people.
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: You know, like munches, munches are a huge gateway to going into spaces.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: Because we all go to restaurants, right, we all go in, we all eat out, and now you're just going into a restaurant and meeting up with a group of people who happen to all be kinky, but out of vanilla restaurant there's no play going on, there's no elaborate costumes, there's no nothing.
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: Oo be scary.
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: You're literally ordering wings and fries and a beer and sitting down, and sometimes you talk kink and sometimes you talk sports and sometimes you just talk about whatever.
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: And so those are great ways to put faces to people, put normality into whatever it is that you're in before you submerge yourself into a space.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: That is all about that.
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and then also to your previous point like even it's out in public like it's.
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: it's out there, so nobody knows why that group of people are together.
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: They could just be.
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: They could be a bowling team, they could be a softball team.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: Nobody knows why they're there.
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: They just see a group of people eating together.
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: So yeah, to your previous point.
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: Even if you're are a bigger body individual like myself, I was still scared to go to certain places because it was a little bit intimidating, so had to build up a nerve to go.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: I can understand the intimidation factor of going to an event or anything sponsored by somebody that you've never been to before.
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: I mean, I play pool.
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: I play in a pool league and you know, the first time after I moved to Florida that I looked for a league here never living here before I walked into a pool hall, I didn't know anybody in there, you know.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: So it's a little intimidating to walk into a place where everybody seems they know everybody and you've got to find your niche.
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: And then, once you meet that one person, you realize, oh, they're just like me.
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: Oh, okay, so they're just people, they're just doing the same thing I am.
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: You find your niche, you just have to be able and willing.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: Well, I mean, we talked about this in previous episodes.
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: You know, when you walk into an established place, you have to find out how you fit into the establishment.
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: The establishment is required to work around you.
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: So if you go in with the mindset of I know I bring this to the table, or I know I just want to sit back, I just want to be in this space, I don't have to talk to a bunch of people, I don't mind small chit chat, but I don't have to meet a lot of people, go in with real, realistic expectations about what you're capable of doing, what you're comfortable doing, and do just that and then work your way up to more involvement as you get comfortable.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: You might go to a munch three or four times and only talk to the same person, but at least you're still going and you're exposing yourself to other people, you're hearing the conversations around you, you're hearing what everybody's talking about and then at your comfort level, you can increase your involvement and increase your participation.
• 15:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I know we make it sound easy but it's definitely not simple for some people and I understand that and I appreciate that it's not.
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: That's why I say go, go in with realistic expectations of what you're capable of doing, not what you expect people to to think you should do.
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: At these events, Everybody thinks, oh my gosh, if I go to a munch I have to sit and I have to make small talk with all these people and I have social anxiety and that's just not who I am.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: Then don't go in with the expectation that you have to make small talk with a bunch of people.
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: Go in with the expectation that you get a table on the edge in the corner and you sit and you order your sandwich and order a drink and if somebody sits down with you, you can say hi to them.
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: But if you look at anybody and say, hey, it's my first time here, I just want to get used to the space.
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: Thank you for approaching me.
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: People will leave you alone and not think bad of you.
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: They'll let you appreciate the fact that you're in the space because we've all been there.
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and for this episode we're going to try to specify down to the specific lifestyle, like stuff, the queer spaces and everything like that, because it is like a national thing where there's like scientists and doctors and certified people that talk about the stuff, especially after the big panini is what they're saying now.
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: A lot of people have not had the IRL interactions with people because they had to be quarantined and everything.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: And there's still parts of the country that will not host events without all of the precautions still in effect.
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: You have to show your cards, you have to show vaccination, you have to show boosters, you have to show negative tests to even get into venues.
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so there's still part of the country that is operating under those standards.
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: And then there's parts of the country that are like like Florida.
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: We don't care about that.
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: Corona what I'm still going out on email beer.
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: That are past that point and back to the.
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: That's yours to manage, not anybody else's.
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: So it's oh, man.
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: It also depends on what region you're in, on what the expectations are.
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: Do we even fill the quarantine when we are here?
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we did there was.
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: We did for a little bit.
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: You realize everybody.
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: Every other state in the country is like.
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: Florida they didn't do nothing, that around her we didn't got to do nothing, that we just keep going out and doing all those things.
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: But yeah, I think it all boils down to being comfortable with your own limitations and being comfortable with your own expectations of what you're capable, what what your desired outcome for the thing is.
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: If you're an outgoing person and you feel you can talk to anybody, that first person that comes up to you say, hey, I want to meet as many people as possible and they will help you make that happen.
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: But if you look at them and go, hey, I'm really nervous, it's my first time, I really don't want to meet a bunch of people.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: They will make sure people leave you alone too.
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: So just have some trust in the fact that this is also everybody else's not first time and that they hold these munches and they hold these events to help gateway people into the lifestyle and into the community and into meeting people.
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: It's the whole reason why these events are designed.
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so.
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like I was saying there's, there's certified people that that are teaching people how to be more sociable.
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: But just for our experiences with the, the munches, whether whatever lifestyle you're in, just know that people might seem very niche and it might be kind of the team kind of hard to break in, but just know that people are there for the new people.
• 19:21
  Speaker 2: Somebody at least hopefully one of the leaders makes it very welcoming for you.
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: They're not going to really hold your hand and kind of like show you around 100%.
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: They'll introduce you, give you an introduction, but it's going to be up to you to try to go out there and make friends and also just know.
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: Pretty much everybody there is having the same issues that you are with being in a group of people, with exception of the people that are there all the time, but there's a bunch.
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: There's always newbies, like, especially after the pinniti, there's a lot of newbies that come out.
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: So there's going to be somebody else in that same boat being there for the first time, just like you are, and nobody bites in public for the most part at a restaurant or something like that.
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: But yeah, they negotiated that they're not going to bite you, so we can't really super generalize it.
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: But most places have consent if they are a public meetup place, so they're not going to bite you Well and, depending on the lifestyle that you're breaking into, there's going to be different social norms.
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I've done the different ones, that the sex positive lifestyle munches and the ones that are just straight like BSM kink and they in public.
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: There's more consent.
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: In general.
• 20:32
  Speaker 2: I can only generalize because I've only done the ones here in central Florida.
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: Now I've gone from like coast to coast but from what I've seen, the public events they're very consensual, not a lot of touching going on.
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: So that's.
• 20:43
  Speaker 2: Another note too is remember you have your boundaries so you can say what you're comfortable with.
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: So just don't go in thinking you have to follow the rules.
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: If you want to wear whatever you want to wear, hopefully it's publicly appropriate in public spaces.
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: I was going to say keep in mind, you're still in a vanilla environment.
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: There are going to be children around you.
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: There are going to be people who don't believe in the lifestyle.
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: There's going to be people who don't even know what exists.
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: But yeah, be publicly aware you have to be public and if you go with inappropriate things on your shirt or what you think is funny, appropriate for the lifestyle but inappropriate for a vanilla setting, people will ask you not to dress like that again because you're outing them.
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: You're calling attention to people who are in a vanilla environment that don't want attention called on them for that.
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: So be appropriate in the way that you're dressed when you go to these events Be publicly appropriate.
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: But remember just because you're going to a BDSM meetup or a leather meetup, for example, does not mean you have to dress a specific certain way.
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: Just be dressed, comfortable and have as much social interaction as you can.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: There's plenty of people in all the different groups that I see that just sit there quietly and nobody messes with them unless they want to be talked to.
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: Nobody says anything to them, At least from what I can see.
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: The leadership is not like hey, that guy's a weirdo or person is a weirdo, watch out for them, or anything like that.
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: But yeah, if you're just going there, sitting there quietly, just hanging out, nobody's going to fault you for that.
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: So I wanted to bring that back to the convention, because we have talked about conventions in the past, but specifically in this space, because I don't know about Rube, but I can just speak for myself I plan on going out in spaces where it's not so much BDSM aware, alternative lifestyle aware, but I'm going to start representing for, like the podcast and my lifestyle.
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: So I kind of kept it calm this time, because you made a point at one point that so a lot of the people didn't know what we were about, and there's I have a couple of stories for you that you didn't hear from my experience with there.
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: I heard some of your experiences but I actually decided to say what my podcast was about because that was a big thing.
• 23:13
  Speaker 2: Everybody pretty much 90% of the people there had a podcast.
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: So first question I'd get is what's your podcast about?
• 23:18
  Speaker 2: And I would tell them non monogamous kink medias and education.
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: And they was like what?
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: There's always a couple of crickets after.
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: We would say that.
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: There was like what?
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: And they would say non monogamous.
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: And they was like check, okay.
• 23:32
  Speaker 2: And they would be like what's BDSM?
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: And I was like, okay, this is why I'm here, I've got work to do.
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: It's like Superman ripping off his shirt when a thing calls.
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: It's like I'm here for you.
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: Now, I'm not gonna go with the worst reaction I got, but not everybody was Receptive, receptive to what we did, and you can talk about your experiences if you want to, but overall, since we were in a creative, friendly space, every there was had something to do with content creation whatsoever.
• 24:59
  Speaker 2: Most of people were receptive in asking questions.
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: So, even if I was talking to multiple people, at least one person would be like what is BDSM?
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: What does it mean?
• 25:09
  Speaker 2: Like asking specifics, how do you start the whole thing?
• 25:12
  Speaker 2: And it's like, okay, I like you, you ask questions, you're not just here to judge.
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: Now, some people would just kind of like walk away.
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: And it's like, okay, you can do that, that's within your power to do that.
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: But I was like how do you have a podcast?
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: And you're just kind of like not asking questions.
• 25:24
  Speaker 2: I thought that was the whole point, but yeah, so that was pretty much my whole entire thing.
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: There was a one point where or the second day after the first day because I actually volunteered, which was great the leaders, the chairpeople of the convention were also part of our taboo lifestyle.
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: They had an alternative lifestyle podcast as well, so it was nice talking to them.
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: They actually got me into the whole convention space and they're like hey, let me try to go out there and try to be aware, be education through awareness for the people that don't know, so that was great to get to meet them, but there was a time even after the first day, I should say I was wearing my vest.
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: So I have my pronouns on my vest and hopefully you guys will see that soon in a video or two or a picture or something like that.
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: One side is my pronouns, the other side is my geeky stuff.
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: As y'all campsters know, I do have my geeky side and it was funny because at one point somebody asked me what are all those pins about?
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: I was like he has to be talking about my pronouns.
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: They're like these are my pronouns.
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: He's like yeah, yeah, yeah, I already know about that.
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: He's like what's that stuff?
• 26:29
  Speaker 2: He's like oh, that's the geeky stuff I meant to.
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: He's like what's a geek?
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: And like once again I had to rip off my shirt like Superman and be like this is what I'm here for.
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: He had never heard the word geek before.
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: Seriously Never.
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: How old was he?
• 26:46
  Speaker 2: Older than me.
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: I don't, I don't know that I Dare, I say older than you.
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: I know that's not possible.
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: But I don't know that.
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: I believe that he had to be older.
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: He had never heard the word geek before he didn't know what a geek was.
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: So this is why we're here, people.
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: People are just not aware.
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: Now, I'm not gonna try to, you know, break it down like, everybody has some geeky part of them.
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: I mean, if you, even if you're a sports ball person, if you've worn a jersey, that's geeky Sports ball.
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: Sports ball person.
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: Yes, I'm leaning inside the other side.
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: I love messing with people.
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: It's like what's football?
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: Is that where you kick the thing into?
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: the goal.
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: Okay, just stop, just stop.
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: I can mess with you too.
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: Just stop.
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: Ha ha ha.
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: So, anyways, this is why we're here.
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: I'm like this is.
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: This person has a podcast.
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: They'd like what is a geek?
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: Cause, I've stopped.
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: For sure he was talking about my pronouns, but he's like yeah, yeah, yeah, what's this?
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: He's like what's a geek?
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: I'm like huh.
• 27:39
  Speaker 2: So I gave him a bad definition because I couldn't really break it down.
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: It was like loud in there.
• 27:44
  Speaker 2: So I was like this is plus.
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: He threw me off with that.
• 27:47
  Speaker 2: But this is why we're here, folks, you can't make assumptions.
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: There's people that just don't know about this stuff, and that was one question I got.
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: But I got a bunch of questions like what is BDSM?
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: So I'm like I need to represent.
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: Or the what does that look like?
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: Or like like they heard the answer, but then they were like but what does that mean?
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: And so they didn't quite understand what, like educating people about it, and all of that meant I thought that I got the.
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: I felt that I got a lot of the typical responses that I get when I'm in a more vanilla ish setting and I say what I do, and they get the whole, their eyes get all wide and they're like oh.
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: And then you inadvertently always hear the stories of oh, I've always wanted to do that, or I had this boyfriend, or I had this girlfriend, or I had this thing and this and that.
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: And then you hear their stories because they feel compelled to that's how they relate is through their own stories or their own experiences with it and be like well, yeah, you know this and that.
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: So that.
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: I got those.
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: Those were expected and I got those, which are fine, cause I love hearing people's stories and I'll be like.
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: Well, you know, have you ever thought of this?
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: And then their eyes wide open and it was very cool.
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: I would say real quick, before you keep going.
• 29:09
  Speaker 2: That was probably my negative of the whole thing is I would want to ask the people stuff, and then, of course, the running joke was we're all podcasters.
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: So it was like save it for the podcast.
• 29:17
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I want to know why.
• 29:19
  Speaker 2: I want to go deeper into the stories.
• 29:20
  Speaker 2: Let's interview these people.
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: You're on a podcast.
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: You talk for a living.
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: Let me know why you like what happened here.
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: But yeah, I had relatively good experiences at the convention.
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: I did not get out of it anywhere near as much as Julius did over here.
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: I had a different expectation of the convention than you did, so the only I want to say negative experience I had was at like an info table where it was people collaborating and talking about a product out there that's designed to help people collaborate, and I was really quiet just listening and I made a comment like I don't know if this is a thing for me, like I don't know if I would benefit from joining or being a part of what you guys are describing.
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: And he was like why, what's your podcast?
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: And I told him and he literally shook his head and was like yeah, I don't think this is a space for you.
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: And then that made me go.
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: Wow, this is a national organization that is like basically a podcast dating service where you create a profile and people can find you based on your content and your expertise, and you can find podcasts based on your content, expertise, and you guys get together and you can collaborate.
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: It's literally like a podcast.
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: It's how it's designed, is almost like a dating site.
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: And then to be told that, based on my content, that it would not be the space for me, I was like wow, you must really not understand the extent of the education that I do, and like when you told that we were in a public place, but, like my reaction is, go fuck him.
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: He doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about.
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: I mean.
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: I literally go to colleges and speak to graduate level psychology majors, people who are about to graduate and be licensed therapist and introduce them to BDSM and King and the psychology behind it and why people do what they do and what people get out of it and the red flags to look for Like there's a whole education aspect of how to do alternative lifestyles safely and all of these things and just to blatantly be told off one sentence that yeah, this would not be the thing for you.
• 31:49
  Speaker 2: Why is a corporate douche?
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: I hear that all my career.
• 31:51
  Speaker 2: They have no idea what they're talking about.
• 31:53
  Speaker 1: That was the biggest negative that I took away from it, because it felt like my 30 years of experience and knowledge and all of the things that I have learned, how to incorporate it into your everyday life and the psychology behind a lot of what we do, a lot of what everybody does and how it's incorporated throughout their life, how it can benefit their life, how to avoid the pitfalls of it.
• 32:19
  Speaker 1: All of that education was negated in like one sentence.
• 32:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, see, and I have a different opinion.
• 32:26
  Speaker 2: I don't know how you actually feel about it, but I'm not here to prove him wrong, because he doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about.
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: I'm not here to prove him wrong.
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: It just further proved my point that what we do still is very superficial in people's minds.
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: Oh well, it's still a very superficial subject when you talk about when you are no longer within the community, or the lifestyle that you teach about when I'm no longer in a BDSM community or a kink community or a nonmonogamous community or leather community or any of those things.
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: When I step outside of it and go to conventions that are adjacent smut books, right, or podcast they're adjacent, they're a part of what I do.
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: Lighter and fetish and stuff like that.
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: All of those, it becomes blatantly obvious that there is.
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: When it's brought up, the first thing people automatically go to is the actions, not the why, but the what.
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: It's what people do.
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: Oh, you handcuff each other, you get strapped to a bed.
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: Or oh, you get spanked.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: Or oh, you get this or you get that.
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: It's all about the actions and nobody ever stops to think for a minute that there's a whole psychology underneath, there's a whole sociology underneath.
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: There's so many things that are intertwined with self-help, books, therapy, all of these things that are all intertwined underneath what everybody does, and that's.
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: I don't feel that I get enough time with them to get past that physical, to get into that deeper level of what people do.
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: This is why we're here, right.
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: Patreon suggestion right there.
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: So it's that's the only frustrating part for me Getting dismissed, I mean it's I'm too old to care.
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: If those are his feelings, those are his feelings, it's his business, not mine.
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: Go forth and prosper.
• 34:38
  Speaker 2: And that's one avenue.
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: I mean Literally what avenue?
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: That's fine with me.
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: It was also very validating to be confronted by a person who was there and their sole purpose was they run a nonprofit to help with domestic violence.
• 34:55
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, we got to talk about the taboo.
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: And when she found out who I was and what I do and why I was there, her eyes instantly lit up and was like you're exactly the kind of person that can teach people what to look for.
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: Anybody can look for the asshole or oh my gosh, he hit me, he abused me, but nobody ever talks about the subtleties or the psychology that people use to, or they use fetishes and this lifestyle or things as a cover to justify their abuse.
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: And then, next thing you know, they make them ashamed for their lifestyle as a form of control and abuse and stuff like that.
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: And she was like I want you so that to me it wasn't about the actions anymore, it's about the.
• 35:45
  Speaker 1: Okay, let's talk about that deeper level, let's talk about all the internal things that it can bring, and not just the what, but the why and the how and things like that.
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: Yes, literally why I started the whole thing.
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: I wanted to know why, and being able to go deep into certain things is like more of an intermediate level with it.
• 36:06
  Speaker 2: So probably can't do it for the podcast, but definitely a Patreon thing like call it and get like a one-on-one session or something like that.
• 36:13
  Speaker 2: But the why that?
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: was a mixed review.
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: You know, of course I got a lot of the oh wow, that's exciting.
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: You know a lot of people's eyes light up.
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: You know we were at.
• 36:22
  Speaker 1: What was it?
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: The singles event.
• 36:25
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: And the minute we talked about it, all their eyes lit up, and then they wanted to share their experiences and all of the things, can you?
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: Talk about RA, please, I loved it.
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: I thought it was great, but those were the reactions I'm used to.
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: Those I can navigate around and I get used to you.
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: Gotta talk about RA please.
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: Talk about what?
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: You can be as vague as possible.
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: You don't remember RA.
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: Oh, I'm so and so on a national thing and I'm a big educator in the dating space and everything like that.
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: Let me tell you about this little thing called relationship anarchy.
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah.
• 37:04
  Speaker 2: It's something that I've come across and a lot of people do.
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: When they started using our terminology.
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: It was wonderful.
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: I thought it was great it was like a secret.
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: It was great.
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: I loved it.
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: It was like a secret.
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: I loved that those crossovers are happening without people knowing that they're happening.
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: It was absolutely amazing to hear it was just funny, as somebody has like had experience and they're like certified and everything, and they're talking about something.
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: Oh, it's just this little thing of relationship anarchy and it's like, yes, what would you like to know?
• 37:31
  Speaker 2: You have a question.
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: And I'm talking to the person.
• 37:33
  Speaker 2: That's like on a national level, like internationally known or whatever, and it's like, once again, I gotta rip my shirt off and show that S on there.
• 37:43
  Speaker 2: Ah it's like yeah, that's not uncommon.
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: There's people that there's a whole group of people that are relationship anarchists.
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: It's not that crazy.
• 37:52
  Speaker 2: You're not saying something so ridiculous.
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: So while I appreciate the conventions that I go to that are my people, my leather conventions, my kink conventions, all of those things why adore all of those conventions and have fun, you have to be careful when you go to conventions that aren't those, because people will not let go of their ideology.
• 38:15
  Speaker 2: They're judging?
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: No, they will.
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: They will absolutely judge you and they're judging you because they don't understand and I get it.
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I will say that happens at all spaces, though.
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: They're judging you because they don't understand.
• 38:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's pretty much all spaces where people will have some kind of judgment about something that's like the societal norm.
• 38:32
  Speaker 2: If you don't understand it, let's judge it first.
• 38:34
  Speaker 2: So we don't wanna just put it on just the podcast convention, but all spaces.
• 38:38
  Speaker 2: This is why I wanted to bring this up, because about the representation part.
• 38:44
  Speaker 2: So I made a request to you to go out there and put your representation hat on and we had different opinions about it.
• 38:53
  Speaker 2: And I represent as gender fluid and I had to explain that to some people as well because they didn't understand what that was.
• 39:00
  Speaker 2: So I was like huh, let me think about this.
• 39:02
  Speaker 2: So I particularly would like to go to these spaces with people that ask a little bit more questions.
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: You know there's might be judgy people there, but whatever.
• 39:10
  Speaker 2: But I'm going to start dressing more in my feminine self.
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: I just need to find a way that's more like professional looking rather than yeah, you asked me to do this and it bit me in the ass.
• 39:20
  Speaker 2: Oh, because somebody commented on-.
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: Well, I just got treated differently.
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, see, I'm all for that, cause I feel like that invites a space for people to just like stop and ask a question Like what-.
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: They didn't stop and ask questions.
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: They side-eyed me the whole day.
• 39:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly See that kind of stuff.
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: I'm like, excuse me, what are you looking at me like that for?
• 39:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 39:37
  Speaker 2: So yeah, we have different views on this, because I'm going to find a more feminine way to represent myself.
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: I've got that punky Bruce revive and I don't think that's very formal for that kind of space.
• 39:48
  Speaker 1: So I need a business for professionals, just for clarification.
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: So Julius talked me the first day I went in like leggings, like just very casual, just very vanilla, me right, cause I'd never been to one before, I didn't know what the space was like, I didn't know what to expect.
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: I had an expectation but didn't know what to expect.
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: So I'm going to go comfortable and blend in.
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: Julius over here decided that it would be great for the podcast and great for us and great for me that if I went-.
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: Marketing, representing more outwardly what the podcast was about.
• 40:25
  Speaker 2: Loose terms, yes.
• 40:26
  Speaker 1: So I wore like my black leggings, I wore my leather boots and I wore a shirt that said not all dominance are men, no, not all dominance are male.
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: That's it.
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: You know, kind of did my hair, did a little makeup, put some effort into it.
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: Let me tell you that right there, that outfit, I got more side-eyed, more weird stares, less people willing to talk to me, because I simply wore that shirt and my boots.
• 41:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, that's exactly.
• 41:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's it.
• 41:03
  Speaker 2: Ah, cause that's just like.
• 41:05
  Speaker 2: What are you looking at?
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: What assumptions are you making there?
• 41:08
  Speaker 2: I hope there's people thought about what they did.
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: I mean, that's the funny thing is like they're podcasters.
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: Like podcasters, you're supposed to do your research, like would you-.
• 41:16
  Speaker 1: Halfway through the day I wanted to kill you.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: Oh my God, I would have loved it.
• 41:20
  Speaker 2: I could have.
• 41:20
  Speaker 2: I just I can't wait till next year, cause yeah, I'm fully cause I'm part of the volunteer committee, so they all loved me and they were giving me high praises and stuff.
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: I'm like I don't need that whatever, but I appreciate it.
• 41:31
  Speaker 2: I appreciate it.
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: No, let me, I just can't take compliments.
• 41:33
  Speaker 2: I appreciate that they liked what I was doing.
• 41:36
  Speaker 2: Just for being me, it's like I'm a military brat, like show up on time.
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: And then you, you commit to something and you do it.
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: That's how I was raised, but people were just like not showing up or not saying anything.
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: They were like what the fuck?
• 41:46
  Speaker 2: And they were like thank you so much.
• 41:47
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm just being mean, Like that's how I was raised Like what, I don't understand that shit.
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: But I will dress more feminine as it goes on, especially in those kinds of spaces, because I understand, like I completely understand you had you got the side eye and everything like that.
• 42:01
  Speaker 2: I live for that because I get looked at all the time.
• 42:04
  Speaker 2: Anyway, I wore the volunteer shirt with like jeans and my vest and people were still like what the fuck?
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: And it's like this little bit got you going Like well, until next year.
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna get the full thing.
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: Don't get me wrong.
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: It doesn't affect my self worth.
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: It doesn't affect my self esteem.
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: I walked right through them as if I was wearing my comfortable clothes.
• 42:28
  Speaker 1: I could just tell a distinct difference how I was being perceived and received by the participants of the podcast.
• 42:38
  Speaker 1: I had less people come up and talk to me the second day than I did the first.
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: That's hilarious.
• 42:46
  Speaker 2: And see, when I get that, I'm just like I'm gonna be louder and louder.
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: You're gonna hear what I have to say.
• 42:51
  Speaker 2: And it's just interesting for me because I get that, even if, like, like you said, I'll dress the first day, just dress down and incognito, and I still get those looks.
• 42:59
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, it's interesting.
• 43:02
  Speaker 2: So it's like for me, I'm just gonna dress more and more flamboyant, how I feel more comfortable and then if you wanna have a conversation, please know you can have a conversation with me.
• 43:10
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, I loved it when people asked me what my buttons on my thing were about or what my podcast was.
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, representation is weird and we know educators in the space and it was interesting for me to hear, like in our space talking about the BDSM and the Kinks and their education and then, like, sometimes they go to a place and they dress more gender conforming to avoid the attention and it's like okay, now you're a person that's identified a certain way for a long time and even you do it, so it's like I completely understand that.
• 43:44
  Speaker 2: But yeah, I'm all for it.
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: In spaces and formal spaces like that, let's bring it on cause we need to educate the people.
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: Cause somebody asked me what a geek was.
• 43:52
  Speaker 2: That happened.
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: Oh my God, that's so crazy.
• 43:58
  Speaker 2: Another thing I wanna touch on is the taboo which you didn't get to hear about.
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: We had a taboo panel that was there.
• 44:04
  Speaker 1: One.
• 44:05
  Speaker 2: it was one, and they were supposed to have been a whole you keep saying that and I told you there was one last year, but the person that runs the taboo track and the taboo group podcasting group if y'all don't know what we're talking about, taboo is literally all the stuff that gets banned in shadow band.
• 44:24
  Speaker 2: So it's not just us Kinksters.
• 44:26
  Speaker 2: There's like suicide, there's trauma, stuff, like.
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: As y'all know, it's not so bad in the podcasting space cause it's audio only, but if you're any on any kind of social media, even if it's education, so fucking stupid with the stupid, the bots and shit, lazy people will go in there and ban you or demonetize your whatever content channel thing you have because you said the word sex in there, even though you're educating people in anal sex or whatever, and it's like that's such bullshit.
• 44:54
  Speaker 2: So we have a whole taboo panel this time, but the organizer of the taboo side of things, the taboo group, they run the whole entire thing.
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: So they just didn't have time.
• 45:07
  Speaker 2: Somebody else is supposed to take care of that.
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: So hopefully that happens before next year and we have more taboo actual stuff going on, because there's a whole space in there and I'm gonna be the one champion.
• 45:17
  Speaker 2: I think that's gonna be my first class for that kind of thing, for the non-taboo conventions and stuff like that is all the different words and stuff you can use, and realizing that each platform like TikTok, you can say certain things, but you can't say that stuff on Instagram, and then all of it.
• 45:34
  Speaker 2: You can't say any of it on YouTube.
• 45:36
  Speaker 2: But then if you have a podcast or a radio show, you can say all kinds of stuff because it's audio only.
• 45:40
  Speaker 2: So a lot of people don't have that.
• 45:41
  Speaker 2: So don't take my class idea.
• 45:43
  Speaker 2: It's fucking good, but that would be something I would teach.
• 45:47
  Speaker 2: On the taboo track.
• 45:48
  Speaker 2: But yeah, it's just, it's so crazy.
• 45:52
  Speaker 2: Like there was one lady she had a nude podcast, like I mean it's audio so you can't tell she's nude, but she was in the taboo thing.
• 45:57
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, just because you're new, but I mean we know this, but like just because you're new doesn't mean it's sex, so why the fuck doesn't matter if she's wearing clothes or not, like that's so stupid, but that's in the taboo track and it's like what the?
• 46:10
  Speaker 2: And then there's the people that have like the cancer podcast or like the suicide podcast.
• 46:14
  Speaker 2: One lady was planning on starting a podcast and I it's vague enough, but she's.
• 46:21
  Speaker 2: She had an experience where she lost it loved one and a child in the same day and it's like holy shit.
• 46:28
  Speaker 2: But I told that story at events afterwards and people were just walking away.
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: I was like this lady's starting a podcast.
• 46:36
  Speaker 2: It's so uncomfortable, they don't want to hear it.
• 46:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they're like, oh my god, it walked away.
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: But I can appreciate that because everybody has their own comfort level, just because it exists doesn't mean you want to listen to it.
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: For leisure no.
• 46:45
  Speaker 2: And I understand if you don't want to listen to the podcast, but I was just talking about what had happened to another person.
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: That was like suicide.
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: They don't want to hear it.
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just they don't want to hear it.
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't stick around and you know, listen to somebody talk about D&D, it's not my thing.
• 47:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I understand you want to talk about it, but if somebody, I guess that's my nerd brain, because if somebody wants to start a podcast, like I've talked to people that listen to D&D podcasts and they're like that's interesting, but I want to know the background behind it, like what do they do exactly?
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: and how they run it and stuff like that.
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: I don't care.
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like I said, it's not about the D&D, it's about starting the podcast, which is why you and I both got different things out of this convention.
• 47:26
  Speaker 1: I personally walked away from the convention, perfectly okay, never attending another one because the bulk of the like I said I had a misconception of what the convention was about.
• 47:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you never said what it was, no, I did?
• 47:39
  Speaker 1: I told the guy that we were having dinner with.
• 47:42
  Speaker 2: I said.
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: You know, in conventions that I have gone to historically in the past, you know you have the education tracks, you have the classes, you have the things, the panels, that everybody goes to, and then you have like booths or you have socials.
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: You have things where you can meet people that you wouldn't normally have access to.
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: So I went thinking, oh well, there's going to be a shit ton of people advertising their podcast.
• 48:11
  Speaker 1: I can go and learn about new podcasts that I might want to listen to.
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: But the entire convention was geared towards the technical side of podcasts the actual doing one, the marketing of them, the editing of them, the, the equipment of them, the how to monetize, how to collaborate, how to get guest speakers, how to do all.
• 48:35
  Speaker 1: It wasn't for listeners.
• 48:39
  Speaker 2: So you thought it was going to be like the smut convention.
• 48:42
  Speaker 2: Yes, okay.
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: And so nothing in the description, nothing in the brochure that I saw online made it seem like it was that techie, that you know what I'm saying.
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: Where have your panels during the day?
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: But then maybe have on Sunday.
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: Have every.
• 49:02
  Speaker 1: Open up all of the walls and everybody who runs a podcast has a booth where you, the listeners, can buy a ticket to come in and meet their favorite podcasters or collaborate and and create collaboration with their listeners and market their part podcast and more of that social aspect where, okay, we all did some education on how to do this better.
• 49:26
  Speaker 1: Now let's open it up to the people who actually listen and support us, so that they can meet us in person and give everybody the opportunity to come do that.
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: That's not what this was.
• 49:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 49:38
  Speaker 1: This was literally for people who want to market, create, edit as for us nerds, or has products that do that for them.
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: It was all very, very, very technical.
• 49:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, for the nerds out there Like like, yes, okay, I see, okay, see I was very disappointed because I was like oh, a podcast convention.
• 50:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you thought it was going to be the like, the reading.
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: Why would you have all of.
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: Why would you have a whole nation's worth of top, top podcasters Like there were people there that are nationally known, all in the same space, and not open it up to the public for them to actually get to meet them?
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: Why would you do?
• 50:22
  Speaker 2: that they have.
• 50:23
  Speaker 2: They have conventions like that.
• 50:24
  Speaker 2: So, just like with the Smutlover's convention, there is like conventions for authors to meet other authors and then go about like it's incorporated.
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: There's always a section for people to be able to come and meet their author and sell their books.
• 50:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's true, but there are conventions just for the authors though, where they don't actually mean they don't advertise them as a you see what I'm saying, like it's not advertised openly like that.
• 50:51
  Speaker 1: So I went in with an expectation, one that there would be a taboo track that I could follow.
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: A bunch of classes regarding whether, like the hardships of having a taboo podcast, the challenges, how to incorporate new thing, like you know what I'm saying, like yeah, they had that last year.
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: Exactly.
• 51:11
  Speaker 2: And then somebody's got to run the group.
• 51:12
  Speaker 2: That's all there is to it.
• 51:13
  Speaker 2: That's literally what they said.
• 51:14
  Speaker 2: And then again.
• 51:15
  Speaker 1: I was even expecting even for a Sunday.
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: Okay, Sunday afternoon, let's open it up and sell ticket.
• 51:21
  Speaker 1: And it wasn't like that at all.
• 51:23
  Speaker 2: Campsters, I didn't.
• 51:25
  Speaker 2: I didn't understand this part when Ru talked about this before, but the real advertisement was literally just walking up to somebody and be like hey, you have to be here for a podcast because podcast convention, because you have a podcast.
• 51:37
  Speaker 2: So the only introduction you had was going up and asking somebody or maybe they had like a shirt on with their podcast name on there- Now there were a shit ton of people walking around with cameras.
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: There was little pockets of people doing podcasts throughout the convention.
• 51:53
  Speaker 1: There was like a crap ton of collaboration amongst themselves.
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you had to get on the app and like plan that stuff, you had to schedule that stuff, but the only other way to like market yourself was to teach a class or something like that or read a discussion or a social dating meetup.
• 52:09
  Speaker 2: I mean just so you can market your wares.
• 52:12
  Speaker 2: But yeah, I get exactly what you mean and I'm pretty sure there are conventions like that where the listeners can come in and meet their podcast.
• 52:19
  Speaker 1: You're literally in central Florida.
• 52:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 52:22
  Speaker 1: You're in, and every people were flying in from all over the country.
• 52:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because they wanted to meet other.
• 52:27
  Speaker 2: I will say the social aspect that you're talking about, those, those after parties were fun.
• 52:31
  Speaker 2: I know you had to run out, but there was one.
• 52:33
  Speaker 2: Thursday too, so that they went to karaoke on Thursday and I missed out on that one.
• 52:36
  Speaker 2: So upset again.
• 52:38
  Speaker 1: I would have thought the whole reason to have a podcast one to get information out there, because there's something that you know, about that.
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: You want to share with the world to, you want to share it with the world and you want listeners.
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: You're probably a podcast is in a podcast.
• 52:52
  Speaker 2: So little bit.
• 52:52
  Speaker 2: Listen to it, yeah, but there's also you need the teaching to how to build this stuff up.
• 52:56
  Speaker 2: So I will say that's.
• 52:58
  Speaker 1: There's space for both, though.
• 53:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah but I will say again, there are conventions specifically for the technical people that like that kind of stuff.
• 53:07
  Speaker 1: So I know what it is?
• 53:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, I know what it is, and you're absolutely 100% right about the taboo thing, but literally the head person that run, that organizes the thing, has a taboo podcast.
• 53:20
  Speaker 2: They're just busy.
• 53:21
  Speaker 1: So and, like I said, you got a lot out of it, but you like, like I literally I made a joke towards the end when I was talking to somebody about this.
• 53:27
  Speaker 1: I was like look I literally I walk in, I sit in front of a mic, I talk and then I leave Like I don't do editing, I don't do the technical stuff, I don't have a desire to.
• 53:38
  Speaker 1: That's not what entices me towards this podcast.
• 53:41
  Speaker 1: I want to be able to sit and talk and collaborate with you and get information out, and do it in a way that makes it approachable to people.
• 53:49
  Speaker 1: All this other stuff behind the scenes, I really don't have it.
• 53:53
  Speaker 1: If it was just me, I would never do it, because I don't have a desire to do it, because I teach in person, so I I like that aspect of it.
• 54:01
  Speaker 2: So a convention like this?
• 54:02
  Speaker 2: How do you market for your?
• 54:04
  Speaker 2: Teaching you me, yeah.
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: I mean I, I go to conventions and conventions market and Then if people see me on something and they're like, hey, would you be willing to come teach at our group?
• 54:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, here's my contact information.
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, reach out and let me know when you want me to teach.
• 54:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Now see, that's kind of why I drew you in here, because this is definitely marketing for classes and it's kind of like yes.
• 54:33
  Speaker 1: It's almost like free marketing, because you get the whole national, because I go to conventions that people fly from all over the country to attend, yeah, and then they see one of my classes, or they.
• 54:44
  Speaker 1: Sit in one of my roundtables.
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: Or they do, they have, they do something that exposes, or they come to the watering hole.
• 54:51
  Speaker 1: You have a podcast.
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: I do have a podcast.
• 54:54
  Speaker 2: There you go.
• 54:54
  Speaker 2: It's good advertiser.
• 54:56
  Speaker 1: It is, and I advertise the podcast.
• 55:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I get okay, so now I understand what you're talking about, what you were expecting versus what actually happened.
• 55:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I like all the conventions, but there are plenty of yeah, I really wasn't for me.
• 55:10
  Speaker 1: Now if they come back with a taboo track where I can take multiple classes that revolve around Specifically what we do, not the back, the front end of it, not the back end of it.
• 55:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, then I would go for those.
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, the.
• 55:24
  Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure that'll come back because somebody's supposed to be leading the taboo group.
• 55:29
  Speaker 2: But in the future I will remember because there are podcast conventions where the listeners can go meet their podcast person.
• 55:36
  Speaker 1: See that I would be all about because I can stand in a booth and and market.
• 55:41
  Speaker 2: Well, yeah, so we have the, the technical conventions out.
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: You can take, you can do those.
• 55:46
  Speaker 1: Don't tell me about any more technical.
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: I 'm good, I'm good, I Stay in my lane.
• 55:57
  Speaker 2: Oh my god, yeah, okay, so that's what you meant, okay, so yeah, I didn't hear that before, so that's interesting.
• 56:03
  Speaker 1: So I guess, if you know what to expect, it's an amazing convention.
• 56:07
  Speaker 1: If that is what you are interested in and that's what you were going like, a brand new Podcaster could go and learn how to beginners track and learn everything from equipment to marketing to editing.
• 56:21
  Speaker 2: Ideas to intermediate all of that and you wanted to grow your listeners and monetize it and all this it's amazing information, a wealth of information for all of those things Me.
• 56:33
  Speaker 1: I stand in front of a mic and I talk, you know yes, we know that's what I do us back in people, no.
• 56:40
  Speaker 1: I'm not a back-end person, it's a dumb bump, oh god.
• 56:44
  Speaker 2: Yes, she can be entertaining at sometimes.
• 56:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I got it in me.
• 56:50
  Speaker 2: I don't even remember.
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: Right, but yeah okay.
• 56:55
  Speaker 2: So yeah, that's the overall of it.
• 56:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I hopefully it might not be this year, but sometime soon definitely going to go to more of the conventions that are Relevant to our thing and the technical stuff and be able to talk about with you campsters about it and then go to the Convention where you could actually meet us at some point today.
• 57:15
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna do that too.
• 57:17
  Speaker 1: No, I had that, I would go they have those.
• 57:20
  Speaker 1: I would go to those.
• 57:22
  Speaker 2: They would have those, and then they have the technical ones.
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: For us people, that's all you, okay?
• 57:27
  Speaker 2: Yes, everybody has their different things that they like.
• 57:29
  Speaker 2: Um, okay, yeah, let's uh.
• 57:32
  Speaker 2: If nothing else, please, campsters, support your taboo podcasters.
• 57:36
  Speaker 2: I will say we because, yeah, the podcast for like over a year.
• 57:40
  Speaker 1: We hit our.
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: Did you see the?
• 57:42
  Speaker 1: Did you see the email that we got?
• 57:44
  Speaker 2: What is it?
• 57:45
  Speaker 1: that we hit our 50th episode.
• 57:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 57:48
  Speaker 1: That's big deal.
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, when we, when I, when people at the convention asked, oh well, how long have you been doing this?
• 57:53
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, we've been doing for about a year and a half.
• 57:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah we're in our second year, I was like we've done almost 50 episodes.
• 57:58
  Speaker 1: They're like, oh wow, that's really good yeah that's quite an accomplishment and I was like, okay, sure, so you weren't there last year.
• 58:08
  Speaker 2: You weren't there last year and people are asking me like 20 episodes, oh that's not bad.
• 58:13
  Speaker 2: Now you say this year's like a year.
• 58:15
  Speaker 1: That's like is a big difference.
• 58:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's really good.
• 58:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, thanks.
• 58:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, 99, 95% of podcasts don't make it to the 20th episode.
• 58:23
  Speaker 2: It's an actual statistic fact.
• 58:26
  Speaker 1: So and I got an email telling us we made it to 50 50.
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: Look at that.
• 58:30
  Speaker 2: Some there's like 10 solo episodes in there too.
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: That's okay, it's still out there.
• 58:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you join me on there.
• 58:36
  Speaker 2: Send you home with just the mic and the little recorder.
• 58:41
  Speaker 1: That's all you need.
• 58:42
  Speaker 1: We'll see.
• 58:43
  Speaker 1: That's it.
• 58:44
  Speaker 2: Okay, so we're about that's an hour here, a little bit short, but that's totally fine as well.
• 58:51
  Speaker 2: Um yeah, oh, support your taboo podcast.
• 58:55
  Speaker 2: Is people?
• 58:55
  Speaker 2: We have it rough out here with the the shadow banding in the Nellis.
• 59:01
  Speaker 2: Demonetization.
• 59:01
  Speaker 2: The fucking conservatives out there with their bullshit.
• 59:04
  Speaker 2: I just saw a meme today that drove me a little insane.
• 59:06
  Speaker 2: But yeah, they want to ban all our stuff.
• 59:09
  Speaker 2: If, if you are sitting there listening to this and like, why don't you have a YouTube channel?
• 59:14
  Speaker 2: Because YouTube bans the shit out of you and I'll have the time for a tick tock where it's like, um, just, it's just constant.
• 59:21
  Speaker 2: I mean I could just copy and paste the Instagram little snippet out there.
• 59:25
  Speaker 2: But, yeah, please, support your taboo podcast.
• 59:28
  Speaker 2: There's not just the lifestyle ones, but yeah, like the cancer ones.
• 59:32
  Speaker 2: People have experiences, they've gone through some stuff and it's like how can you not like we're not certified, but you should be able to talk about trauma?
• 59:39
  Speaker 2: Everybody has trauma, generalization, everybody has trauma.
• 59:43
  Speaker 2: You just I don't understand how you can't talk about it.
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: Like you, you literally say you're not An educator, just like us.
• 59:49
  Speaker 2: We're not actual certified people, but we have experiences.
• 59:52
  Speaker 2: Like how can you Ban people from talking about that stuff?
• 59:56
  Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, yeah.
• 59:58
  Speaker 2: So support your support.
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 2: Just literally, you know you have to pay anything.
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 2: Just go ahead and rate, put in that rating on whatever app you're listening to iTunes, spotify, amazon, whatever they most have mostly have rating things on there.
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 2: There's no, there's a bell.
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 2: I don't know if that counts for Metrics or whatever, but yeah, just please rate, rate the podcast, and I know y'all listen to a bunch of different ones.
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 2: That actually helps.
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 2: So.
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 1: I understand.
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 2: I understand you.
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 2: You watch it.
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 2: The downloaders were looking at you as well.
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 2: Thank you very much for downloading the podcast.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 2: That helps as well.
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 2: But yeah, just to support your taboo podcast was people we're trying to get out there and and Educate the people with the experience, because, yeah, there's some, there's some people that went through some stuff, man, and they can't talk about it because they'll get banned.
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 2: For saying the grape word or the Ola station word is like I don't, can, and it changes every year.
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 2: What you can and can't say, that's so ridiculous.
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, we're here to educate through awareness, and then you know there's other people that educate or Are aware of certain things as well.
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 2: Okay, well, that's my little serious rant for now.
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 2: There you go.
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 2: This has been the bonfire that's kinky Still no around the kinky campfire with a gay.
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 2: We have new episodes every second and fourth Thursday of the month on all major podcasting platforms.
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 2: Please check out campfire kinksters with a K on Instagram.
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 2: And as I look back at my name, who is sitting across from me?
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 2: This is true and this is, gently make fluffing stuff.
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 2: We fluff it gently fluff it gently officially if you want to contact me.
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 2: It's hh Julius, his happiness.
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 2: That is it for now.
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 1: Goodbye.