Latest / Confident and Empowered Women / Choosing Yourself Without Needing Agreement | EP 278

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Choosing Yourself Without Needing Agreement | EP 278 · Confident and Empowered Women

• 0:05
  One
• 0:05
  of
• 0:05
  the
• 0:05
  hardest,
• 0:06
  most
• 0:06
  isolating,
• 0:07
  most
• 0:08
  terrifying,
• 0:09
  and
• 0:09
  yet
• 0:09
  most
• 0:10
  rewarding,
• 0:11
  exhilarating
• 0:12
  confidence
• 0:13
  building,
• 0:13
  Perhaps
• 0:14
  the
• 0:14
  most
• 0:15
  loving
• 0:15
  thing
• 0:16
  you
• 0:16
  can
• 0:16
  do
• 0:17
  is
• 0:17
  choose
• 0:18
  yourself
• 0:19
  without
• 0:20
  needing
• 0:20
  agreement,
• 0:21
  not
• 0:22
  agreement
• 0:22
  from
• 0:22
  your
• 0:22
  family,
• 0:23
  friends,
• 0:24
  not
• 0:25
  agreement
• 0:25
  from
• 0:25
  the
• 0:25
  people
• 0:25
  who
• 0:26
  benefit
• 0:26
  from
• 0:27
  you
• 0:27
  staying
• 0:27
  the
• 0:27
  same.
• 0:28
  And
• 0:28
  I
• 0:29
  wanna
• 0:29
  say
• 0:29
  this
• 0:29
  clearly,
• 0:30
  this
• 0:31
  isn't
• 0:31
  about
• 0:31
  becoming
• 0:32
  cold
• 0:33
  or
• 0:33
  selfish.
• 0:34
  It's
• 0:34
  about
• 0:34
  becoming
• 0:35
  steady.
• 0:36
  This
• 0:37
  episode
• 0:37
  is
• 0:37
  a
• 0:37
  training
• 0:38
  ground,
• 0:38
  and
• 0:39
  we
• 0:39
  are
• 0:39
  building
• 0:40
  disappointment,
• 0:41
  tolerance.
• 0:42
  Oh,
• 0:43
  and
• 0:43
  before
• 0:43
  we
• 0:43
  go
• 0:43
  any
• 0:44
  further,
• 0:44
  make
• 0:45
  sure
• 0:45
  you
• 0:45
  are
• 0:45
  subscribed.
• 0:46
  These
• 0:47
  episodes
• 0:48
  build
• 0:48
  on
• 0:48
  each
• 0:49
  other,
• 0:49
  and
• 0:49
  if
• 0:49
  you
• 0:49
  are
• 0:50
  ready
• 0:50
  to
• 0:50
  move
• 0:50
  differently
• 0:51
  in
• 0:51
  this
• 0:51
  season,
• 0:52
  you'll
• 0:53
  want
• 0:53
  access
• 0:54
  to
• 0:54
  all
• 0:54
  of
• 0:54
  them.
• 0:54
  Okay,
• 0:55
  let's
• 0:56
  get
• 0:56
  into
• 0:56
  it.
• 1:00
  Welcome
• 1:01
  back
• 1:01
  to
• 1:01
  the
• 1:01
  series,
• 1:02
  unavailable
• 1:03
  for
• 1:03
  Self
• 1:03
  Abandonment,
• 1:05
  a
• 1:05
  series
• 1:05
  for
• 1:06
  women
• 1:06
  who
• 1:06
  are
• 1:07
  done
• 1:07
  negotiating
• 1:08
  with
• 1:08
  themselves.
• 1:09
  This
• 1:10
  is
• 1:10
  for
• 1:10
  the
• 1:10
  woman
• 1:10
  who's
• 1:11
  confident
• 1:11
  enough
• 1:12
  to
• 1:12
  disappoint
• 1:13
  because
• 1:13
  self-trust
• 1:14
  is
• 1:14
  now
• 1:15
  the
• 1:15
  new
• 1:15
  standard
• 1:16
  here.
• 1:17
  Confidence
• 1:17
  is
• 1:18
  more
• 1:18
  than
• 1:18
  a
• 1:18
  feeling.
• 1:19
  It's
• 1:19
  a
• 1:19
  belief.
• 1:20
  Formed
• 1:20
  through
• 1:21
  action,
• 1:21
  practice,
• 1:22
  and
• 1:22
  repetition.
• 1:23
  It's
• 1:24
  what
• 1:24
  you
• 1:24
  do
• 1:24
  when
• 1:25
  it
• 1:25
  would
• 1:25
  be
• 1:25
  easier
• 1:26
  to
• 1:26
  explain
• 1:26
  yourself,
• 1:27
  perform
• 1:28
  or
• 1:28
  betray
• 1:29
  what
• 1:30
  you
• 1:30
  already
• 1:30
  know
• 1:31
  to
• 1:31
  be
• 1:31
  true
• 1:32
  for
• 1:32
  you.
• 1:32
  So
• 1:33
  if
• 1:33
  you
• 1:33
  are
• 1:33
  ready
• 1:34
  to
• 1:34
  stop
• 1:34
  abandoning
• 1:35
  yourself,
• 1:35
  just
• 1:36
  to
• 1:36
  keep
• 1:36
  the
• 1:36
  peace
• 1:37
  you
• 1:37
  are
• 1:38
  in
• 1:38
  the
• 1:38
  right
• 1:39
  place.
• 1:42
  Hey,
• 1:42
  hey,
• 1:42
  hey
• 1:43
  friend.
• 1:43
  I'm
• 1:44
  super
• 1:44
  happy
• 1:45
  to
• 1:45
  connect
• 1:46
  with
• 1:46
  you
• 1:46
  here.
• 1:47
  We
• 1:47
  are
• 1:47
  gathered
• 1:47
  here
• 1:48
  today
• 1:50
  to
• 1:50
  talk
• 1:51
  about
• 1:51
  one
• 1:52
  of
• 1:52
  the
• 1:52
  hardest
• 1:52
  things
• 1:53
  to
• 1:53
  learn,
• 1:54
  and
• 1:54
  it
• 1:54
  isn't
• 1:55
  saying
• 1:55
  no,
• 1:56
  it's
• 1:56
  how
• 1:57
  to
• 1:57
  stay.
• 1:58
  After
• 1:58
  you
• 1:58
  say
• 1:59
  it
• 1:59
  not
• 2:00
  to
• 2:00
  over
• 2:00
  explain,
• 2:01
  not
• 2:01
  to
• 2:01
  rush,
• 2:02
  to
• 2:02
  fix
• 2:03
  the
• 2:03
  discomfort
• 2:04
  or
• 2:04
  awkward
• 2:05
  silence.
• 2:06
  Not
• 2:06
  to
• 2:06
  reverse
• 2:07
  uno
• 2:07
  yourself
• 2:10
  just
• 2:11
  because
• 2:11
  someone
• 2:12
  else
• 2:12
  is
• 2:12
  disappointed.
• 2:13
  Self-love
• 2:14
  isn't
• 2:15
  always
• 2:15
  loud.
• 2:16
  It's
• 2:17
  staying
• 2:17
  present
• 2:18
  without
• 2:18
  persuasion.
• 2:19
  Even
• 2:20
  from
• 2:20
  your
• 2:20
  own
• 2:21
  self,
• 2:21
  you
• 2:22
  can
• 2:22
  be
• 2:22
  kind
• 2:23
  and
• 2:23
  still
• 2:23
  be
• 2:23
  firm,
• 2:24
  loving
• 2:25
  and
• 2:25
  still
• 2:26
  aligned.
• 2:27
  This
• 2:27
  series
• 2:28
  is
• 2:28
  all
• 2:28
  about
• 2:28
  being
• 2:29
  confident
• 2:29
  enough
• 2:30
  to
• 2:30
  disappoint
• 2:30
  people,
• 2:31
  which
• 2:32
  might
• 2:32
  be
• 2:32
  one
• 2:33
  of
• 2:33
  the
• 2:33
  most
• 2:33
  loving
• 2:34
  things
• 2:34
  you
• 2:35
  ever
• 2:35
  do,
• 2:36
  and
• 2:36
  it's
• 2:36
  not
• 2:37
  because
• 2:37
  you
• 2:38
  don't
• 2:38
  care,
• 2:38
  because
• 2:39
  friend,
• 2:39
  you
• 2:40
  have
• 2:41
  such
• 2:41
  a
• 2:41
  big
• 2:42
  heart.
• 2:43
  I
• 2:43
  know
• 2:43
  this
• 2:44
  about
• 2:44
  you,
• 2:45
  but
• 2:45
  because
• 2:45
  you
• 2:46
  finally
• 2:46
  do
• 2:47
  care
• 2:47
  enough
• 2:48
  about
• 2:48
  you,
• 2:50
  which
• 2:50
  low
• 2:51
  key
• 2:51
  may
• 2:51
  be
• 2:51
  the
• 2:51
  main
• 2:52
  person
• 2:52
  you've
• 2:53
  been
• 2:53
  leaving
• 2:53
  out
• 2:54
  in
• 2:54
  the
• 2:54
  cold,
• 2:55
  This
• 2:56
  is
• 2:56
  about
• 2:56
  choosing
• 2:57
  yourself
• 2:58
  without
• 2:58
  collapsing,
• 2:59
  without
• 3:00
  over
• 3:00
  explaining,
• 3:01
  without
• 3:01
  needing
• 3:02
  agreement.
• 3:03
  If
• 3:04
  you
• 3:04
  are
• 3:04
  tired
• 3:04
  of
• 3:04
  negotiating
• 3:05
  your
• 3:05
  truth,
• 3:06
  just
• 3:06
  to
• 3:06
  keep
• 3:06
  the
• 3:07
  peace,
• 3:07
  come
• 3:07
  on
• 3:08
  in
• 3:08
  and
• 3:08
  listen.
• 3:09
  You
• 3:10
  are
• 3:10
  not
• 3:10
  selfish.
• 3:11
  You
• 3:11
  are
• 3:12
  becoming
• 3:12
  steady.
• 3:13
  If
• 3:14
  you've
• 3:14
  ever
• 3:14
  felt
• 3:14
  the
• 3:15
  urge
• 3:15
  to
• 3:15
  disappear,
• 3:16
  just
• 3:17
  to
• 3:17
  keep
• 3:17
  the
• 3:17
  peace,
• 3:18
  friend,
• 3:18
  pull
• 3:18
  up
• 3:19
  a
• 3:19
  seat
• 3:20
  because
• 3:20
  this
• 3:20
  episode
• 3:21
  is
• 3:21
  definitely
• 3:22
  for
• 3:22
  you.
• 3:23
  The
• 3:23
  real
• 3:23
  struggle
• 3:24
  isn't
• 3:24
  the
• 3:24
  decision
• 3:25
  itself,
• 3:26
  it's
• 3:26
  what
• 3:26
  happens
• 3:27
  emotionally
• 3:28
  when
• 3:28
  you're
• 3:28
  standing
• 3:29
  in
• 3:29
  it,
• 3:30
  you
• 3:30
  feel
• 3:31
  torn,
• 3:31
  emotionally
• 3:32
  pulled
• 3:33
  a
• 3:33
  little
• 3:34
  scared
• 3:34
  to
• 3:34
  disappoint
• 3:35
  people.
• 3:36
  And
• 3:36
  if
• 3:36
  we're
• 3:36
  honest,
• 3:37
  a
• 3:37
  little
• 3:37
  sad,
• 3:38
  you
• 3:39
  know,
• 3:39
  you
• 3:39
  want
• 3:40
  more
• 3:40
  from
• 3:40
  yourself
• 3:41
  and
• 3:41
  from
• 3:42
  the
• 3:42
  relationships
• 3:43
  in
• 3:43
  your
• 3:43
  life,
• 3:44
  but
• 3:44
  you're
• 3:44
  afraid
• 3:45
  of.
• 3:46
  What
• 3:46
  you
• 3:46
  might
• 3:47
  have
• 3:47
  to
• 3:47
  give
• 3:47
  up
• 3:48
  just
• 3:48
  to
• 3:48
  have
• 3:48
  it
• 3:49
  and
• 3:50
  you're
• 3:50
  stuck
• 3:50
  in
• 3:51
  this
• 3:51
  internal
• 3:52
  tug
• 3:52
  of
• 3:52
  war.
• 3:53
  Am
• 3:53
  I
• 3:54
  selfish
• 3:54
  or
• 3:55
  am
• 3:55
  I
• 3:55
  being
• 3:56
  self-honoring?
• 3:57
  That
• 3:57
  kind
• 3:58
  of
• 3:58
  inner
• 3:58
  turmoil
• 3:59
  slowly
• 4:00
  disconnects
• 4:01
  you
• 4:01
  from
• 4:02
  your.
• 4:02
  Self.
• 4:03
  I
• 4:03
  remember
• 4:04
  sitting
• 4:04
  with
• 4:04
  a
• 4:04
  decision
• 4:05
  I
• 4:05
  knew
• 4:06
  was
• 4:07
  right
• 4:07
  for
• 4:07
  me,
• 4:08
  and
• 4:08
  yet
• 4:09
  feeling
• 4:09
  that
• 4:09
  urge
• 4:10
  to
• 4:10
  explain
• 4:11
  it
• 4:11
  just
• 4:12
  one
• 4:12
  more
• 4:12
  time.
• 4:13
  Not
• 4:13
  because
• 4:13
  I
• 4:13
  wasn't
• 4:14
  sure,
• 4:15
  but
• 4:15
  because
• 4:15
  I
• 4:15
  wanted
• 4:16
  them
• 4:16
  to
• 4:17
  be
• 4:17
  okay
• 4:18
  and
• 4:18
  realizing
• 4:19
  that
• 4:19
  urge,
• 4:20
  that
• 4:21
  was
• 4:21
  the
• 4:21
  work
• 4:22
  approval
• 4:23
  is
• 4:23
  not
• 4:24
  alignment.
• 4:25
  It's
• 4:25
  important
• 4:26
  to
• 4:26
  recognize
• 4:27
  whose
• 4:27
  approval
• 4:28
  you're
• 4:28
  actually
• 4:29
  looking
• 4:29
  for,
• 4:30
  because
• 4:31
  if
• 4:31
  you're
• 4:31
  looking
• 4:31
  outside
• 4:32
  of
• 4:32
  yourself,
• 4:33
  you
• 4:33
  are
• 4:33
  already
• 4:34
  setting
• 4:34
  yourself
• 4:34
  up
• 4:35
  for
• 4:35
  disappointment.
• 4:37
  I
• 4:37
  have
• 4:37
  seen
• 4:38
  this
• 4:38
  pattern
• 4:38
  with
• 4:39
  myself
• 4:39
  and
• 4:39
  in
• 4:40
  so
• 4:40
  many
• 4:40
  women
• 4:41
  I
• 4:41
  work
• 4:41
  with.
• 4:42
  The
• 4:42
  moment
• 4:42
  we
• 4:43
  choose
• 4:43
  ourselves,
• 4:44
  we
• 4:45
  start
• 4:45
  rehearsing
• 4:46
  explanations
• 4:47
  and
• 4:48
  friend.
• 4:48
  If
• 4:48
  you
• 4:49
  are
• 4:49
  anything
• 4:49
  like
• 4:49
  my
• 4:50
  old
• 4:50
  people
• 4:50
  pleasing
• 4:51
  self,
• 4:52
  you
• 4:52
  got
• 4:52
  at
• 4:52
  least
• 4:52
  five
• 4:53
  good
• 4:53
  explanations
• 4:54
  in
• 4:54
  your
• 4:54
  back
• 4:54
  pocket
• 4:55
  to
• 4:55
  pull
• 4:55
  out
• 4:55
  at
• 4:56
  any
• 4:56
  given
• 4:56
  moment.
• 5:00
  As
• 5:00
  if
• 5:01
  clarity
• 5:01
  needs
• 5:02
  permission.
• 5:03
  Spoiler
• 5:04
  alert,
• 5:04
  it
• 5:05
  doesn't.
• 5:06
  Here's
• 5:06
  the
• 5:06
  first
• 5:07
  shift
• 5:08
  and
• 5:08
  it's
• 5:08
  foundational.
• 5:09
  This
• 5:10
  was
• 5:10
  never
• 5:10
  about
• 5:11
  getting
• 5:11
  into
• 5:12
  agreement
• 5:12
  with
• 5:13
  other
• 5:13
  people.
• 5:14
  It
• 5:14
  was
• 5:15
  always
• 5:15
  about
• 5:16
  getting
• 5:16
  into
• 5:16
  agreement
• 5:17
  with
• 5:17
  who
• 5:17
  God
• 5:18
  made
• 5:19
  you
• 5:19
  to
• 5:19
  be.
• 5:20
  Feel
• 5:20
  free
• 5:20
  to
• 5:21
  insert
• 5:21
  your
• 5:21
  own
• 5:22
  belief
• 5:22
  here.
• 5:23
  Whether
• 5:23
  it's
• 5:24
  God's
• 5:24
  source,
• 5:25
  creator,
• 5:26
  the
• 5:26
  universe,
• 5:27
  or
• 5:28
  whom
• 5:28
  you
• 5:28
  believe
• 5:29
  in
• 5:30
  all
• 5:30
  are
• 5:30
  welcome
• 5:31
  here.
• 5:32
  That
• 5:32
  alignment
• 5:33
  between
• 5:33
  you
• 5:34
  and
• 5:34
  your
• 5:34
  creator
• 5:35
  is
• 5:36
  everything.
• 5:37
  Consensus
• 5:38
  is
• 5:39
  external
• 5:40
  and
• 5:40
  alignment.
• 5:41
  Is
• 5:42
  internal.
• 5:43
  You
• 5:43
  don't
• 5:44
  need
• 5:44
  a
• 5:44
  committee
• 5:45
  when
• 5:45
  you
• 5:46
  have
• 5:46
  a
• 5:46
  calling
• 5:47
  and
• 5:47
  when
• 5:47
  you
• 5:48
  are
• 5:48
  aligned,
• 5:49
  you
• 5:49
  stop
• 5:50
  going
• 5:50
  back
• 5:51
  and
• 5:51
  forth
• 5:51
  with
• 5:51
  yourself
• 5:52
  just
• 5:52
  to
• 5:52
  make
• 5:53
  other
• 5:53
  people
• 5:53
  comfortable,
• 5:54
  especially
• 5:55
  people
• 5:56
  who
• 5:57
  may
• 5:57
  never
• 5:57
  be
• 5:57
  comfortable.
• 5:59
  Truth
• 5:59
  be
• 5:59
  told,
• 6:00
  comfortable.
• 6:01
  That
• 6:02
  part,
• 6:02
  that's
• 6:03
  their
• 6:03
  job,
• 6:04
  and
• 6:04
  it
• 6:04
  is
• 6:04
  really
• 6:05
  our
• 6:05
  job
• 6:06
  to
• 6:07
  take
• 6:07
  a
• 6:07
  step
• 6:07
  back
• 6:08
  and
• 6:08
  allow
• 6:09
  God
• 6:09
  and
• 6:09
  Jesus
• 6:10
  to
• 6:10
  do
• 6:10
  they
• 6:10
  job
• 6:11
  instead
• 6:11
  of
• 6:11
  us
• 6:11
  trying
• 6:11
  to
• 6:11
  mind
• 6:12
  they
• 6:12
  business.
• 6:16
  The
• 6:17
  second
• 6:17
  shift
• 6:18
  is
• 6:18
  letting
• 6:18
  people
• 6:19
  have
• 6:20
  their
• 6:20
  reactions.
• 6:21
  Listen,
• 6:22
  my
• 6:23
  mom
• 6:23
  used
• 6:23
  to
• 6:23
  say
• 6:23
  something
• 6:24
  that
• 6:24
  always
• 6:25
  grounded
• 6:26
  me.
• 6:26
  She'd
• 6:27
  say
• 6:27
  they'll
• 6:27
  be
• 6:28
  fine.
• 6:29
  And
• 6:29
  you
• 6:29
  know
• 6:29
  what?
• 6:30
  They
• 6:30
  will
• 6:30
  be.
• 6:32
  But
• 6:32
  here's
• 6:33
  the
• 6:33
  real
• 6:33
  question.
• 6:34
  Will
• 6:35
  you
• 6:35
  be
• 6:36
  in
• 6:36
  the
• 6:36
  long
• 6:37
  term?
• 6:37
  Will
• 6:37
  you
• 6:38
  be
• 6:38
  fine
• 6:38
  knowing
• 6:39
  you
• 6:39
  put
• 6:40
  people
• 6:40
  above
• 6:41
  yourself
• 6:42
  who
• 6:42
  would
• 6:43
  not
• 6:43
  and
• 6:43
  often
• 6:44
  are
• 6:44
  not
• 6:45
  doing
• 6:45
  the
• 6:45
  same
• 6:46
  for
• 6:46
  you?
• 6:46
  We
• 6:47
  already
• 6:47
  have
• 6:48
  enough
• 6:49
  examples,
• 6:49
  friend,
• 6:50
  of
• 6:50
  taking
• 6:51
  that
• 6:51
  chance.
• 6:52
  We
• 6:52
  don't
• 6:52
  need
• 6:53
  any
• 6:53
  more
• 6:53
  evidence
• 6:54
  of
• 6:54
  how
• 6:55
  that
• 6:55
  works
• 6:56
  out.
• 6:56
  Okay?
• 6:58
  People
• 6:58
  are
• 6:59
  allowed.
• 6:59
  To
• 7:00
  have
• 7:00
  reactions.
• 7:01
  Reactions
• 7:02
  are
• 7:02
  not
• 7:03
  emergencies
• 7:04
  and
• 7:04
  discomfort
• 7:05
  is
• 7:05
  not
• 7:06
  danger.
• 7:06
  Be
• 7:07
  okay
• 7:08
  with
• 7:08
  people
• 7:09
  deciding
• 7:10
  to
• 7:10
  exit
• 7:11
  your
• 7:11
  story.
• 7:13
  If
• 7:13
  the
• 7:13
  road
• 7:13
  you
• 7:14
  are
• 7:14
  about
• 7:14
  to
• 7:14
  travel
• 7:15
  down
• 7:15
  doesn't
• 7:16
  suit
• 7:16
  them,
• 7:16
  be
• 7:17
  okay
• 7:17
  with
• 7:17
  them
• 7:18
  opting
• 7:18
  out.
• 7:19
  We
• 7:19
  all
• 7:20
  have
• 7:20
  this
• 7:21
  thing
• 7:21
  called
• 7:21
  free
• 7:22
  will,
• 7:22
  and
• 7:23
  we
• 7:23
  each
• 7:23
  get
• 7:24
  to
• 7:24
  exercise
• 7:25
  it
• 7:25
  in
• 7:25
  a
• 7:25
  way
• 7:26
  that's.
• 7:26
  Supports
• 7:27
  us.
• 7:27
  This
• 7:28
  is
• 7:28
  an
• 7:28
  individual
• 7:29
  choice,
• 7:29
  and
• 7:30
  just
• 7:30
  as
• 7:30
  you
• 7:30
  are
• 7:30
  making
• 7:31
  yours
• 7:31
  for
• 7:31
  you,
• 7:32
  grant
• 7:33
  others
• 7:33
  the
• 7:33
  same
• 7:34
  grace
• 7:34
  to
• 7:35
  decide
• 7:35
  this
• 7:36
  for
• 7:36
  themselves.
• 7:37
  One
• 7:37
  thing
• 7:38
  I've
• 7:38
  really
• 7:39
  had
• 7:39
  to
• 7:39
  learn
• 7:39
  with
• 7:40
  relationships
• 7:41
  is
• 7:41
  how
• 7:41
  seasonal
• 7:42
  they
• 7:43
  can
• 7:43
  be.
• 7:44
  As
• 7:44
  humans,
• 7:45
  we
• 7:45
  are
• 7:45
  collectors.
• 7:47
  We
• 7:47
  love
• 7:48
  to
• 7:48
  collect
• 7:48
  things
• 7:49
  and
• 7:49
  keep
• 7:49
  them
• 7:49
  forever.
• 7:50
  That
• 7:50
  includes
• 7:51
  the
• 7:51
  people
• 7:52
  in
• 7:52
  our
• 7:52
  lives.
• 7:53
  Sometimes
• 7:54
  the
• 7:54
  very
• 7:55
  people
• 7:55
  we
• 7:56
  are
• 7:56
  supposed
• 7:57
  to
• 7:57
  set
• 7:57
  free
• 7:58
  are
• 7:58
  the
• 7:58
  very
• 7:58
  ones
• 7:59
  we
• 8:00
  allow
• 8:00
  to
• 8:00
  suppress
• 8:01
  us.
• 8:02
  Some
• 8:02
  people
• 8:03
  were
• 8:03
  meant
• 8:03
  to
• 8:04
  last
• 8:04
  a
• 8:04
  season,
• 8:05
  and
• 8:05
  I
• 8:05
  don't
• 8:06
  mean
• 8:06
  from
• 8:07
  summer
• 8:07
  to
• 8:07
  fall,
• 8:08
  I
• 8:08
  mean
• 8:08
  years.
• 8:09
  Sure
• 8:10
  that
• 8:10
  season
• 8:11
  it
• 8:11
  could
• 8:11
  have
• 8:11
  lasted
• 8:12
  10
• 8:12
  years,
• 8:13
  but
• 8:14
  it
• 8:14
  doesn't
• 8:14
  mean
• 8:15
  that
• 8:16
  it's
• 8:16
  fit
• 8:17
  for
• 8:17
  the
• 8:17
  next
• 8:17
  10
• 8:18
  years.
• 8:19
  Just
• 8:19
  be
• 8:19
  grateful.
• 8:20
  For
• 8:21
  that
• 8:21
  season,
• 8:22
  however
• 8:22
  long
• 8:23
  it
• 8:23
  lasted,
• 8:24
  you
• 8:24
  both
• 8:25
  needed
• 8:25
  each
• 8:25
  other
• 8:26
  to
• 8:26
  go
• 8:26
  through
• 8:26
  that
• 8:27
  season
• 8:27
  and
• 8:28
  it
• 8:28
  was
• 8:28
  beautiful
• 8:30
  for
• 8:30
  however
• 8:31
  long
• 8:31
  that
• 8:32
  season
• 8:32
  was,
• 8:33
  whether
• 8:33
  it
• 8:34
  be
• 8:34
  months
• 8:36
  or
• 8:36
  years.
• 8:37
  Appreciate
• 8:38
  cherish
• 8:39
  and
• 8:40
  honor
• 8:40
  it.
• 8:41
  Be
• 8:41
  willing
• 8:41
  to
• 8:41
  write
• 8:42
  your
• 8:42
  next
• 8:42
  chapters
• 8:43
  and
• 8:43
  be
• 8:44
  open
• 8:44
  to
• 8:45
  what
• 8:45
  is
• 8:45
  coming
• 8:46
  to
• 8:46
  support
• 8:46
  who
• 8:47
  you
• 8:47
  are
• 8:47
  becoming.
• 8:48
  And
• 8:49
  that
• 8:49
  my
• 8:49
  friend
• 8:50
  is
• 8:50
  the
• 8:50
  magic.
• 8:51
  Now
• 8:52
  this
• 8:52
  third
• 8:52
  shift
• 8:53
  right
• 8:53
  here.
• 8:54
  Ooh,
• 8:54
  this
• 8:54
  one.
• 8:55
  It's
• 8:55
  coming
• 8:55
  in
• 8:55
  hot,
• 8:56
  straight
• 8:56
  up,
• 8:56
  no
• 8:57
  chaser.
• 8:58
  Stop
• 8:58
  negotiating.
• 8:59
  Truth
• 8:59
  for
• 8:59
  harmony.
• 9:00
  This
• 9:00
  is
• 9:01
  where
• 9:01
  emotional
• 9:02
  maturity
• 9:03
  really
• 9:03
  shows
• 9:03
  up
• 9:04
  and
• 9:04
  shows
• 9:04
  out.
• 9:05
  When
• 9:05
  you
• 9:05
  stop
• 9:06
  softening
• 9:07
  the
• 9:07
  truth,
• 9:08
  stop
• 9:08
  over
• 9:09
  explaining
• 9:09
  your
• 9:09
  decisions.
• 9:10
  Stop
• 9:11
  shrinking
• 9:12
  what
• 9:12
  you
• 9:12
  know
• 9:13
  is
• 9:13
  real
• 9:14
  for
• 9:14
  you,
• 9:15
  just
• 9:15
  to
• 9:15
  keep
• 9:15
  the
• 9:15
  peace,
• 9:16
  because
• 9:17
  harmony
• 9:17
  that
• 9:18
  requires
• 9:18
  self
• 9:19
  betrayal
• 9:20
  will
• 9:20
  always
• 9:21
  cost
• 9:21
  you
• 9:22
  yourself
• 9:23
  every
• 9:23
  time
• 9:24
  For
• 9:24
  so
• 9:25
  long
• 9:25
  we've
• 9:26
  been
• 9:26
  conditioned
• 9:26
  to
• 9:26
  believe
• 9:27
  that
• 9:27
  if
• 9:28
  we
• 9:28
  treated
• 9:28
  others
• 9:29
  the
• 9:29
  way
• 9:29
  we
• 9:30
  want
• 9:30
  it
• 9:30
  to
• 9:30
  be
• 9:30
  treated,
• 9:31
  they
• 9:31
  do
• 9:32
  the
• 9:32
  same
• 9:32
  for
• 9:32
  us.
• 9:33
  Hello,
• 9:34
  Barney.
• 9:34
  I
• 9:35
  love
• 9:35
  you.
• 9:35
  It
• 9:36
  does
• 9:36
  not
• 9:36
  mean
• 9:36
  that
• 9:37
  you
• 9:37
  love
• 9:37
  me.
• 9:40
  I
• 9:41
  Low
• 9:41
  Key
• 9:41
  got
• 9:41
  a
• 9:41
  beef
• 9:42
  with
• 9:42
  Barney
• 9:42
  about
• 9:42
  that.
• 9:42
  Okay?
• 9:46
  But
• 9:46
  that's
• 9:46
  a
• 9:46
  show
• 9:47
  for
• 9:47
  another
• 9:47
  day.
• 9:50
  There
• 9:50
  was
• 9:50
  so
• 9:51
  much
• 9:51
  conditioning
• 9:52
  to
• 9:53
  believe
• 9:53
  that
• 9:53
  if
• 9:54
  you
• 9:54
  made
• 9:54
  it
• 9:54
  easier
• 9:55
  for
• 9:55
  everyone
• 9:55
  else,
• 9:56
  setting
• 9:57
  yourself
• 9:57
  on
• 9:57
  the
• 9:57
  back
• 9:58
  burner
• 9:58
  was
• 9:58
  the
• 9:58
  right
• 9:59
  thing
• 9:59
  to
• 9:59
  do
• 10:00
  for
• 10:00
  the
• 10:00
  greater
• 10:00
  good
• 10:01
  of
• 10:01
  everyone.
• 10:03
  If
• 10:03
  you
• 10:03
  made
• 10:03
  your
• 10:03
  truth
• 10:04
  more
• 10:04
  palatable,
• 10:05
  digestible,
• 10:06
  or
• 10:06
  less
• 10:07
  strong.
• 10:08
  Being
• 10:08
  nice
• 10:09
  was
• 10:09
  better
• 10:10
  than
• 10:10
  being
• 10:10
  negative.
• 10:11
  If
• 10:11
  you
• 10:12
  have
• 10:12
  to
• 10:12
  abandon
• 10:13
  yourself
• 10:13
  to
• 10:14
  maintain
• 10:14
  the
• 10:14
  peace,
• 10:15
  it
• 10:16
  was
• 10:16
  never
• 10:16
  peace
• 10:16
  to
• 10:17
  begin
• 10:17
  with,
• 10:18
  especially
• 10:19
  when
• 10:19
  it
• 10:19
  wages
• 10:20
  a
• 10:20
  war
• 10:21
  within
• 10:21
  you.
• 10:22
  It's
• 10:23
  never
• 10:23
  harmony.
• 10:24
  If
• 10:24
  you
• 10:24
  in
• 10:24
  turn
• 10:25
  feel
• 10:26
  self-hatred,
• 10:27
  harmony
• 10:28
  is
• 10:28
  something
• 10:28
  that's
• 10:29
  achieved
• 10:29
  for
• 10:30
  all,
• 10:31
  and
• 10:31
  sometimes
• 10:32
  that
• 10:32
  harmony
• 10:33
  looks
• 10:34
  like
• 10:34
  different
• 10:34
  outcomes
• 10:35
  for
• 10:35
  all
• 10:36
  involved.
• 10:37
  Yet
• 10:37
  when
• 10:38
  you
• 10:38
  choose
• 10:38
  yourself,
• 10:39
  the
• 10:39
  sense
• 10:40
  of
• 10:40
  peace
• 10:40
  and
• 10:41
  harmony
• 10:41
  that
• 10:41
  you
• 10:42
  experience
• 10:43
  as
• 10:43
  a
• 10:43
  result
• 10:44
  of
• 10:44
  honoring
• 10:45
  your
• 10:45
  own
• 10:45
  truth
• 10:46
  is
• 10:46
  priceless.
• 10:48
  Now,
• 10:49
  let
• 10:49
  me
• 10:49
  say
• 10:49
  this,
• 10:50
  honoring
• 10:50
  your
• 10:51
  truth
• 10:51
  is
• 10:51
  not
• 10:52
  about
• 10:52
  being
• 10:52
  mean,
• 10:53
  is
• 10:53
  not
• 10:54
  about
• 10:54
  giving
• 10:54
  people
• 10:55
  the
• 10:55
  top
• 10:55
  flight
• 10:55
  business,
• 10:56
  even
• 10:56
  if
• 10:56
  they
• 10:57
  deserve
• 10:57
  it.
• 10:59
  It's
• 10:59
  about
• 11:00
  honoring
• 11:00
  yourself
• 11:01
  in
• 11:01
  a
• 11:01
  way
• 11:02
  where
• 11:02
  you
• 11:02
  love,
• 11:03
  honor,
• 11:04
  and
• 11:04
  respect
• 11:04
  yourself
• 11:05
  while
• 11:06
  holding
• 11:06
  that
• 11:06
  invitation
• 11:07
  for
• 11:08
  others
• 11:08
  and
• 11:09
  whether
• 11:09
  they
• 11:09
  accept
• 11:10
  that
• 11:10
  invitation
• 11:10
  or
• 11:10
  not.
• 11:11
  That's
• 11:12
  their
• 11:12
  choice.
• 11:13
  That's
• 11:13
  their
• 11:14
  free
• 11:15
  will.
• 11:16
  Confidence
• 11:17
  isn't
• 11:17
  always
• 11:18
  loud.
• 11:18
  It's
• 11:19
  regulated
• 11:20
  disappointment.
• 11:21
  Tolerance
• 11:22
  is
• 11:23
  the
• 11:23
  muscle
• 11:23
  that
• 11:23
  lets
• 11:24
  you
• 11:24
  stay
• 11:24
  present
• 11:25
  with
• 11:25
  yourself
• 11:26
  while
• 11:26
  someone
• 11:27
  else
• 11:27
  adjust.
• 11:29
  You
• 11:29
  don't
• 11:29
  rush
• 11:30
  to
• 11:30
  fix
• 11:30
  it.
• 11:31
  You
• 11:31
  don't
• 11:31
  chase
• 11:32
  reassurance
• 11:33
  and
• 11:33
  you
• 11:34
  don't
• 11:34
  uno
• 11:34
  reverse
• 11:35
  your
• 11:35
  decision
• 11:36
  to
• 11:36
  soothe
• 11:37
  someone
• 11:37
  else's
• 11:38
  feelings.
• 11:39
  You
• 11:39
  let
• 11:40
  the
• 11:40
  shaky
• 11:41
  sensations
• 11:42
  pass
• 11:43
  without
• 11:43
  folding.
• 11:46
  Okay,
• 11:46
  friend,
• 11:46
  can
• 11:47
  I
• 11:47
  tell
• 11:47
  you
• 11:47
  something?
• 11:48
  I
• 11:48
  had
• 11:48
  to
• 11:48
  learn
• 11:48
  the
• 11:48
  hard
• 11:49
  way.
• 11:49
  There
• 11:50
  was
• 11:50
  a
• 11:50
  season
• 11:50
  where
• 11:51
  I
• 11:51
  understood
• 11:52
  pretty
• 11:52
  much
• 11:53
  everything
• 11:53
  about
• 11:53
  myself,
• 11:54
  and
• 11:55
  yet
• 11:55
  nothing
• 11:56
  in
• 11:56
  my
• 11:56
  life
• 11:56
  was
• 11:56
  changing.
• 11:57
  And
• 11:58
  if
• 11:58
  that's
• 11:58
  you
• 11:58
  right
• 11:58
  now,
• 11:59
  listen,
• 12:00
  you
• 12:00
  are
• 12:00
  not
• 12:00
  stuck
• 12:01
  or
• 12:01
  broken.
• 12:02
  You
• 12:02
  are
• 12:02
  just
• 12:02
  past
• 12:03
  the
• 12:03
  point
• 12:03
  where
• 12:03
  more
• 12:04
  awareness
• 12:04
  helps.
• 12:05
  At
• 12:06
  this
• 12:06
  stage,
• 12:06
  insight
• 12:07
  won't
• 12:07
  move
• 12:08
  you,
• 12:08
  but
• 12:08
  decision.
• 12:09
  Definitely
• 12:10
  will
• 12:11
  that
• 12:11
  pause
• 12:12
  You?
• 12:12
  Keep
• 12:12
  calling
• 12:12
  timing.
• 12:13
  That's
• 12:14
  the
• 12:14
  moment
• 12:15
  where
• 12:15
  self-trust
• 12:16
  gets
• 12:16
  built.
• 12:17
  That's
• 12:17
  exactly
• 12:18
  why
• 12:18
  I
• 12:19
  created
• 12:19
  the
• 12:19
  main
• 12:20
  character
• 12:20
  Momentum
• 12:21
  Builder
• 12:21
  to
• 12:22
  help
• 12:22
  you
• 12:22
  move
• 12:22
  forward
• 12:23
  before
• 12:24
  you
• 12:24
  feel
• 12:24
  ready,
• 12:25
  without
• 12:25
  forcing
• 12:26
  and
• 12:27
  without
• 12:27
  waiting
• 12:28
  on
• 12:28
  confidence
• 12:29
  to
• 12:29
  catch
• 12:29
  up.
• 12:30
  If
• 12:30
  you're
• 12:30
  ready
• 12:30
  to
• 12:31
  stop
• 12:31
  circling
• 12:32
  and
• 12:32
  start
• 12:32
  moving,
• 12:32
  like
• 12:33
  someone
• 12:33
  who
• 12:33
  trusts
• 12:33
  herself,
• 12:34
  it's
• 12:35
  waiting
• 12:35
  for
• 12:35
  you
• 12:36
  in
• 12:36
  the
• 12:36
  show
• 12:36
  notes.
• 12:40
  Now,
• 12:40
  listen,
• 12:41
  everything
• 12:41
  we've
• 12:42
  talked
• 12:42
  about
• 12:42
  so
• 12:42
  far
• 12:43
  sounds
• 12:43
  powerful,
• 12:44
  right?
• 12:45
  But
• 12:45
  insight
• 12:46
  alone
• 12:47
  doesn't
• 12:47
  change
• 12:48
  behavior
• 12:49
  capacity
• 12:50
  does.
• 12:50
  Most
• 12:51
  people,
• 12:52
  they
• 12:52
  don't
• 12:52
  abandon
• 12:52
  themselves
• 12:53
  because
• 12:53
  they
• 12:54
  don't
• 12:54
  know
• 12:54
  any
• 12:54
  better.
• 12:55
  They
• 12:55
  abandon
• 12:56
  themselves
• 12:56
  because
• 12:57
  they
• 12:57
  don't
• 12:57
  know
• 12:57
  how
• 12:58
  to
• 12:58
  stay
• 12:59
  with
• 12:59
  themselves
• 13:00
  when
• 13:00
  it
• 13:00
  gets
• 13:01
  uncomfortable.
• 13:02
  So
• 13:02
  I
• 13:02
  wanna
• 13:03
  give
• 13:03
  you
• 13:03
  a
• 13:04
  self-love
• 13:04
  two
• 13:04
  step,
• 13:05
  not
• 13:05
  as
• 13:06
  a
• 13:06
  concept,
• 13:06
  but
• 13:07
  as
• 13:07
  a
• 13:07
  practice.
• 13:08
  You
• 13:08
  can
• 13:08
  put
• 13:08
  into
• 13:09
  play
• 13:09
  right
• 13:10
  now,
• 13:10
  something
• 13:11
  you
• 13:11
  can
• 13:11
  come
• 13:11
  back
• 13:12
  to
• 13:12
  at
• 13:13
  the
• 13:13
  moment,
• 13:13
  choosing
• 13:14
  yourself
• 13:15
  starts
• 13:15
  to
• 13:15
  feel
• 13:15
  scary.
• 13:16
  And
• 13:17
  this
• 13:17
  self-love
• 13:18
  two
• 13:18
  step
• 13:18
  is
• 13:18
  choosing
• 13:19
  yourself
• 13:20
  without
• 13:20
  collapse.
• 13:21
  Step
• 13:22
  one,
• 13:22
  get
• 13:23
  aligned
• 13:24
  before
• 13:24
  you
• 13:24
  are
• 13:24
  activated.
• 13:26
  This
• 13:26
  step
• 13:26
  happens
• 13:27
  before
• 13:28
  the
• 13:28
  conversation,
• 13:29
  ahead
• 13:29
  of
• 13:30
  the
• 13:30
  pushback
• 13:30
  and
• 13:31
  before
• 13:32
  the
• 13:32
  reaction.
• 13:33
  Ask
• 13:33
  yourself
• 13:34
  quietly.
• 13:35
  Honestly,
• 13:36
  and
• 13:37
  without
• 13:37
  negotiating
• 13:38
  what
• 13:39
  is
• 13:39
  true
• 13:39
  for
• 13:40
  me,
• 13:41
  not
• 13:41
  what's
• 13:41
  convenient,
• 13:42
  not
• 13:43
  what
• 13:43
  will
• 13:43
  keep
• 13:43
  the
• 13:44
  peace,
• 13:44
  but
• 13:45
  what
• 13:45
  is
• 13:45
  true
• 13:47
  when
• 13:47
  you
• 13:47
  decide
• 13:48
  in
• 13:48
  advance,
• 13:49
  you
• 13:49
  stop
• 13:50
  bargaining
• 13:50
  with
• 13:51
  yourself
• 13:51
  in
• 13:52
  emotionally
• 13:53
  charged
• 13:54
  moments.
• 13:55
  Decisions
• 13:56
  protect
• 13:57
  your
• 13:57
  self-Trust
• 13:58
  alignment
• 13:59
  before
• 14:00
  activation
• 14:01
  is
• 14:01
  exactly
• 14:02
  how
• 14:02
  you
• 14:03
  stop.
• 14:03
  Abandoning
• 14:04
  yourself.
• 14:05
  Step
• 14:06
  two.
• 14:06
  Stay
• 14:07
  present
• 14:08
  without
• 14:08
  persuasion.
• 14:10
  This
• 14:10
  step
• 14:10
  is
• 14:11
  a
• 14:11
  powerful
• 14:11
  shift
• 14:12
  friend
• 14:12
  when
• 14:13
  disappointment
• 14:14
  shows
• 14:14
  up,
• 14:15
  when
• 14:15
  the
• 14:15
  silence
• 14:16
  stretches
• 14:17
  you
• 14:17
  far
• 14:17
  beyond
• 14:18
  your
• 14:18
  comfort
• 14:18
  zone,
• 14:19
  when
• 14:19
  someone
• 14:20
  doesn't
• 14:21
  understand
• 14:22
  you
• 14:23
  stay,
• 14:24
  you
• 14:24
  don't
• 14:24
  rush
• 14:25
  to
• 14:25
  explain.
• 14:26
  You
• 14:27
  don't
• 14:27
  over
• 14:27
  justify.
• 14:29
  You
• 14:29
  don't
• 14:29
  reverse
• 14:30
  uno
• 14:30
  yourself
• 14:32
  to
• 14:32
  soothe
• 14:33
  the
• 14:33
  moment
• 14:34
  you
• 14:34
  let
• 14:34
  kindness
• 14:36
  exist
• 14:37
  without
• 14:37
  collapsing.
• 14:39
  Now
• 14:39
  we're
• 14:39
  gonna
• 14:40
  spend
• 14:40
  a
• 14:40
  little
• 14:40
  bit
• 14:40
  more
• 14:40
  time
• 14:41
  here
• 14:41
  and
• 14:41
  make
• 14:42
  it
• 14:42
  real,
• 14:42
  because
• 14:43
  this
• 14:43
  is
• 14:43
  where
• 14:43
  most
• 14:44
  of
• 14:44
  us
• 14:44
  break.
• 14:44
  Okay?
• 14:46
  It's
• 14:47
  like
• 14:47
  saying
• 14:48
  no
• 14:49
  and
• 14:49
  not
• 14:49
  following
• 14:50
  it
• 14:50
  with
• 14:50
  a
• 14:50
  paragraph,
• 14:52
  not
• 14:52
  no,
• 14:53
  because
• 14:53
  I'm
• 14:53
  tired.
• 14:54
  I've
• 14:54
  had
• 14:54
  a
• 14:54
  long
• 14:55
  week
• 14:55
  and
• 14:55
  I
• 14:55
  already
• 14:56
  said
• 14:56
  yes
• 14:56
  to
• 14:56
  something
• 14:57
  else,
• 14:57
  and
• 14:58
  I
• 14:58
  hope
• 14:58
  you
• 14:58
  understand,
• 15:00
  but
• 15:00
  simply
• 15:01
  I'm
• 15:02
  not
• 15:02
  available
• 15:02
  for
• 15:02
  that.
• 15:03
  And
• 15:03
  then
• 15:04
  letting
• 15:04
  the
• 15:04
  silence
• 15:05
  be
• 15:05
  there
• 15:06
  without
• 15:07
  rushing
• 15:08
  to
• 15:08
  fill
• 15:08
  it.
• 15:09
  It
• 15:09
  looks
• 15:09
  like
• 15:10
  watching
• 15:10
  someone
• 15:11
  feel
• 15:11
  disappointed
• 15:12
  and
• 15:13
  not
• 15:14
  changing
• 15:14
  your
• 15:15
  mind
• 15:15
  to
• 15:16
  make
• 15:16
  that
• 15:16
  feeling
• 15:17
  go
• 15:17
  away.
• 15:18
  You
• 15:19
  can
• 15:19
  acknowledge
• 15:20
  them.
• 15:20
  I
• 15:20
  know
• 15:21
  this
• 15:21
  isn't
• 15:21
  what
• 15:21
  you
• 15:21
  wanted,
• 15:22
  and
• 15:23
  you
• 15:23
  don't
• 15:24
  undo
• 15:25
  yourself
• 15:26
  to
• 15:26
  fix
• 15:26
  it.
• 15:27
  You
• 15:27
  let
• 15:28
  them
• 15:28
  have
• 15:28
  their
• 15:29
  process.
• 15:30
  it
• 15:30
  looks
• 15:30
  like
• 15:31
  feeling
• 15:31
  the
• 15:31
  urge
• 15:32
  to
• 15:32
  go
• 15:32
  back
• 15:33
  and
• 15:33
  clean
• 15:33
  it
• 15:34
  up
• 15:34
  and
• 15:35
  choosing
• 15:35
  not
• 15:36
  to.
• 15:36
  You
• 15:36
  notice
• 15:37
  the
• 15:37
  impulse
• 15:38
  to
• 15:38
  send
• 15:39
  the
• 15:39
  follow-up
• 15:39
  text
• 15:40
  to
• 15:40
  soften
• 15:41
  it
• 15:41
  more
• 15:42
  to
• 15:42
  make
• 15:42
  sure
• 15:43
  they're
• 15:43
  okay,
• 15:44
  and
• 15:44
  instead
• 15:45
  you
• 15:45
  take
• 15:46
  a
• 15:46
  breath.
• 15:47
  And
• 15:47
  just
• 15:47
  stay
• 15:49
  kind,
• 15:49
  tone,
• 15:50
  firm
• 15:51
  boundary.
• 15:52
  Compassion
• 15:53
  Without
• 15:53
  collapse,
• 15:54
  presence,
• 15:55
  without
• 15:56
  persuasion,
• 15:57
  you
• 15:57
  can
• 15:57
  be
• 15:58
  warm
• 15:58
  and
• 15:58
  still
• 15:59
  be
• 15:59
  firm
• 16:00
  loving
• 16:00
  and
• 16:01
  still
• 16:01
  aligned.
• 16:03
  Their
• 16:03
  reaction
• 16:04
  does
• 16:04
  not
• 16:04
  require
• 16:05
  your
• 16:05
  self
• 16:06
  betrayal.
• 16:07
  You
• 16:07
  don't
• 16:07
  need
• 16:08
  to
• 16:08
  harden.
• 16:09
  To
• 16:09
  be
• 16:09
  whole.
• 16:10
  You
• 16:10
  just
• 16:11
  need
• 16:11
  to
• 16:12
  stop
• 16:12
  negotiating.
• 16:13
  Staying
• 16:14
  present
• 16:14
  without
• 16:15
  persuasion
• 16:16
  doesn't
• 16:17
  mean
• 16:17
  you
• 16:17
  don't
• 16:17
  care.
• 16:18
  It
• 16:19
  means
• 16:19
  you
• 16:19
  care
• 16:20
  enough
• 16:20
  about
• 16:21
  yourself
• 16:22
  not
• 16:23
  to
• 16:23
  disappear.
• 16:24
  This
• 16:25
  is
• 16:25
  how
• 16:25
  self-trust
• 16:26
  is
• 16:26
  built,
• 16:26
  one
• 16:27
  steady
• 16:27
  moment
• 16:28
  at
• 16:28
  a
• 16:28
  time.
• 16:29
  And
• 16:30
  now
• 16:30
  from
• 16:30
  this
• 16:31
  place,
• 16:32
  what's
• 16:32
  your
• 16:32
  next
• 16:33
  best
• 16:33
  step
• 16:33
  for
• 16:34
  you
• 16:34
  to
• 16:34
  take?
• 16:35
  That
• 16:35
  is
• 16:36
  in
• 16:36
  alignment
• 16:37
  with
• 16:37
  honoring
• 16:37
  yourself.
• 16:39
  The
• 16:39
  self-love
• 16:39
  two
• 16:40
  step.
• 16:40
  It
• 16:40
  gets
• 16:40
  you
• 16:41
  started,
• 16:41
  but
• 16:42
  around
• 16:42
  here
• 16:43
  we
• 16:43
  co-create.
• 16:45
  So
• 16:45
  pause,
• 16:46
  hand
• 16:47
  to
• 16:47
  heart,
• 16:48
  listen
• 16:49
  and
• 16:49
  take
• 16:50
  that
• 16:50
  step.
• 16:51
  We're
• 16:52
  just
• 16:52
  gonna
• 16:52
  let
• 16:52
  that
• 16:52
  breathe
• 16:53
  a
• 16:53
  little
• 16:53
  bit.
• 16:53
  Okay?
• 16:53
  I.
• 16:56
  Now
• 16:56
  lemme
• 16:57
  pour
• 16:57
  into
• 16:57
  you
• 16:57
  real
• 16:58
  quick.
• 16:58
  You
• 16:59
  are
• 16:59
  strong,
• 17:00
  you
• 17:00
  are
• 17:00
  powerful.
• 17:02
  You
• 17:02
  are
• 17:02
  capable
• 17:03
  of
• 17:04
  honoring
• 17:04
  yourself
• 17:05
  right
• 17:05
  where
• 17:06
  you
• 17:06
  stand
• 17:07
  sometimes
• 17:08
  it
• 17:08
  looks
• 17:08
  like
• 17:08
  letting
• 17:09
  someone
• 17:10
  misunderstand
• 17:11
  you.
• 17:11
  Temporarily
• 17:13
  or
• 17:13
  even
• 17:14
  permanently
• 17:15
  because
• 17:16
  you
• 17:16
  know
• 17:17
  who
• 17:17
  you
• 17:17
  are
• 17:18
  and
• 17:19
  whose
• 17:19
  you
• 17:20
  are.
• 17:21
  You
• 17:21
  stop
• 17:21
  auditioning
• 17:22
  for
• 17:22
  clarity.
• 17:23
  You
• 17:24
  trust
• 17:24
  that
• 17:24
  being
• 17:24
  aligned
• 17:25
  matters
• 17:26
  more
• 17:27
  than
• 17:27
  being
• 17:28
  perfectly
• 17:28
  perceived.
• 17:30
  You
• 17:30
  cannot
• 17:31
  control
• 17:32
  how
• 17:32
  they
• 17:32
  perceive
• 17:33
  you.
• 17:34
  Friend,
• 17:35
  once
• 17:35
  you
• 17:35
  release
• 17:36
  this.
• 17:37
  You
• 17:37
  create
• 17:38
  so
• 17:38
  much
• 17:39
  more
• 17:39
  freedom
• 17:39
  for
• 17:39
  yourself.
• 17:41
  Their
• 17:41
  perception
• 17:42
  about
• 17:43
  you
• 17:44
  is
• 17:44
  more
• 17:44
  about
• 17:45
  them
• 17:46
  than
• 17:46
  it
• 17:46
  is
• 17:46
  about
• 17:46
  you.
• 17:47
  So
• 17:47
  let
• 17:48
  'em
• 17:48
  have
• 17:48
  it.
• 17:49
  You
• 17:49
  will
• 17:50
  disappoint
• 17:51
  some
• 17:51
  people
• 17:51
  along
• 17:52
  the
• 17:52
  way.
• 17:53
  The
• 17:53
  goal
• 17:54
  is
• 17:54
  to
• 17:54
  make
• 17:55
  sure
• 17:56
  you're
• 17:56
  not
• 17:56
  one
• 17:56
  of
• 17:56
  them.
• 17:57
  Okay?
• 17:58
  Ooh,
• 17:59
  that
• 17:59
  was
• 17:59
  good.
• 18:02
  You
• 18:03
  will
• 18:04
  disappoint
• 18:04
  some
• 18:05
  people
• 18:05
  along
• 18:06
  the
• 18:06
  way.
• 18:07
  The
• 18:07
  goal
• 18:07
  is
• 18:08
  to
• 18:08
  make
• 18:08
  sure
• 18:09
  you
• 18:09
  are
• 18:09
  not
• 18:09
  one
• 18:09
  of
• 18:09
  them.
• 18:10
  This
• 18:11
  is
• 18:11
  about
• 18:11
  how
• 18:12
  you
• 18:13
  see
• 18:13
  yourself.
• 18:14
  I
• 18:14
  invite
• 18:15
  you
• 18:15
  to
• 18:16
  see
• 18:16
  yourself
• 18:17
  for
• 18:17
  the
• 18:17
  divine
• 18:18
  creation
• 18:19
  you
• 18:19
  are.
• 18:20
  This
• 18:20
  is
• 18:21
  how
• 18:21
  self-love
• 18:21
  becomes
• 18:22
  real,
• 18:23
  not
• 18:23
  just
• 18:24
  in
• 18:24
  how
• 18:24
  you
• 18:24
  talk
• 18:24
  to
• 18:24
  yourself
• 18:25
  when
• 18:25
  you're
• 18:26
  all
• 18:26
  alone,
• 18:27
  but
• 18:27
  in
• 18:27
  how
• 18:28
  you
• 18:28
  stay.
• 18:29
  With
• 18:29
  yourself
• 18:30
  when
• 18:31
  you
• 18:31
  are
• 18:31
  misunderstood.
• 18:33
  This
• 18:33
  is
• 18:33
  how
• 18:33
  confidence
• 18:34
  gets
• 18:35
  built,
• 18:35
  not
• 18:36
  by
• 18:36
  proving
• 18:36
  yourself,
• 18:37
  but
• 18:38
  by
• 18:38
  trusting
• 18:39
  yourself
• 18:40
  every
• 18:41
  time
• 18:41
  you
• 18:41
  choose.
• 18:42
  Alignment
• 18:43
  over
• 18:44
  approval,
• 18:45
  something
• 18:45
  inside
• 18:46
  you
• 18:46
  settle.
• 18:48
  And
• 18:48
  over
• 18:48
  time
• 18:49
  you
• 18:49
  become
• 18:50
  someone
• 18:51
  you
• 18:51
  don't
• 18:51
  have
• 18:51
  to
• 18:51
  convince
• 18:53
  because
• 18:53
  you
• 18:53
  know
• 18:55
  who
• 18:55
  you
• 18:55
  are.
• 18:56
  That
• 18:56
  level
• 18:57
  of
• 18:57
  confidence
• 18:58
  is
• 18:58
  what
• 18:59
  allows
• 18:59
  you
• 18:59
  to
• 18:59
  stand
• 19:00
  firm.
• 19:01
  When
• 19:01
  people
• 19:02
  try
• 19:03
  to
• 19:03
  tell
• 19:03
  you.
• 19:04
  Who
• 19:04
  you
• 19:04
  are
• 19:05
  and
• 19:05
  you
• 19:05
  can
• 19:05
  recognize
• 19:07
  that
• 19:07
  is
• 19:08
  their
• 19:08
  projection
• 19:09
  and
• 19:09
  not
• 19:10
  your
• 19:10
  reflection.
• 19:11
  Self-love
• 19:12
  isn't
• 19:12
  always
• 19:13
  loud.
• 19:14
  It's
• 19:14
  loyal
• 19:16
  and
• 19:16
  this,
• 19:17
  this
• 19:17
  is
• 19:18
  what
• 19:18
  loyalty
• 19:18
  to
• 19:18
  yourself
• 19:19
  actually
• 19:20
  looks
• 19:20
  like.
• 19:21
  I
• 19:21
  want
• 19:21
  you
• 19:21
  to
• 19:22
  sit
• 19:22
  with
• 19:22
  this.
• 19:23
  Where
• 19:24
  are
• 19:24
  you
• 19:24
  afraid
• 19:25
  of
• 19:25
  what
• 19:25
  you'll
• 19:25
  lose
• 19:26
  if
• 19:27
  you
• 19:27
  truly
• 19:27
  choose
• 19:28
  yourself
• 19:29
  and
• 19:29
  ask
• 19:30
  yourself
• 19:30
  honestly,
• 19:31
  is
• 19:32
  it
• 19:32
  worth
• 19:32
  your
• 19:32
  self
• 19:33
  trust?
• 19:34
  Your
• 19:35
  self
• 19:35
  love,
• 19:36
  your
• 19:36
  self-worth?
• 19:37
  Now,
• 19:38
  if
• 19:38
  you
• 19:38
  are
• 19:38
  okay
• 19:39
  with
• 19:39
  making
• 19:40
  that
• 19:40
  sacrifice,
• 19:41
  just
• 19:42
  be
• 19:42
  honest
• 19:42
  with
• 19:42
  yourself.
• 19:43
  No
• 19:43
  shade,
• 19:44
  no
• 19:44
  shame.
• 19:45
  Sometimes
• 19:46
  this
• 19:47
  is
• 19:47
  just
• 19:47
  where
• 19:48
  we
• 19:48
  are,
• 19:49
  and
• 19:49
  that's
• 19:50
  okay,
• 19:51
  but
• 19:51
  if
• 19:51
  you're
• 19:52
  not
• 19:52
  willing
• 19:52
  to
• 19:52
  make
• 19:53
  that
• 19:53
  sacrifice,
• 19:54
  what
• 19:55
  action
• 19:55
  can
• 19:55
  you
• 19:56
  take
• 19:57
  to
• 19:57
  reflect
• 19:57
  that?
• 19:58
  How
• 19:58
  will
• 19:59
  you
• 19:59
  honor
• 19:59
  yourself?
• 20:00
  Staying
• 20:01
  aligned
• 20:01
  with
• 20:02
  the
• 20:02
  best
• 20:02
  of
• 20:02
  who
• 20:03
  you
• 20:03
  are
• 20:04
  is
• 20:04
  how
• 20:04
  you
• 20:05
  live
• 20:05
  your
• 20:05
  life
• 20:06
  as
• 20:07
  the
• 20:07
  best
• 20:07
  of
• 20:07
  who
• 20:08
  you
• 20:08
  are.
• 20:09
  Now,
• 20:10
  I
• 20:10
  love
• 20:11
  me
• 20:11
  some
• 20:11
  personal
• 20:12
  development.
• 20:13
  It's
• 20:13
  my
• 20:13
  jam.
• 20:14
  It
• 20:15
  focuses
• 20:16
  a
• 20:16
  lot
• 20:16
  on
• 20:16
  who
• 20:17
  you're
• 20:17
  becoming,
• 20:18
  which.
• 20:18
  Is
• 20:19
  very
• 20:19
  important,
• 20:20
  but
• 20:20
  who
• 20:21
  you
• 20:21
  are
• 20:21
  being
• 20:22
  is
• 20:23
  equally
• 20:24
  important.
• 20:25
  In
• 20:25
  order
• 20:25
  to
• 20:26
  become
• 20:27
  you
• 20:27
  have
• 20:27
  to
• 20:28
  be
• 20:29
  first,
• 20:30
  to
• 20:30
  reconnect
• 20:31
  with
• 20:31
  yourself.
• 20:32
  Check
• 20:32
  in
• 20:33
  and
• 20:33
  ask,
• 20:34
  who
• 20:34
  am
• 20:34
  I
• 20:34
  being?
• 20:36
  And
• 20:36
  take
• 20:36
  the
• 20:36
  next
• 20:37
  right
• 20:37
  action
• 20:38
  from
• 20:39
  that
• 20:39
  place.
• 20:40
  Ooh,
• 20:41
  Friend
• 20:41
  Ooh,
• 20:42
  this
• 20:42
  is
• 20:42
  good.
• 20:44
  Choosing
• 20:45
  yourself
• 20:46
  isn't
• 20:46
  rejection.
• 20:47
  It's
• 20:48
  respect
• 20:49
  and
• 20:50
  being
• 20:50
  confident
• 20:51
  enough
• 20:51
  to
• 20:51
  disappoint
• 20:52
  might
• 20:52
  be
• 20:53
  one
• 20:53
  of
• 20:53
  the
• 20:53
  most
• 20:53
  loving
• 20:54
  things
• 20:55
  you
• 20:55
  ever
• 20:55
  do,
• 20:56
  and
• 20:56
  every
• 20:57
  time
• 20:57
  you
• 20:57
  choose
• 20:58
  yourself.
• 20:59
  Even
• 20:59
  when
• 20:59
  it's
• 21:00
  uncomfortable,
• 21:01
  you
• 21:01
  strengthen
• 21:02
  a
• 21:02
  belief
• 21:02
  you
• 21:03
  can
• 21:03
  rely
• 21:04
  on.
• 21:04
  The
• 21:05
  moment
• 21:05
  you
• 21:05
  reconnect
• 21:06
  to
• 21:06
  yourself.
• 21:07
  Confidence
• 21:08
  returns.
• 21:09
  Ooh,
• 21:10
  friend.
• 21:10
  Stay
• 21:11
  unavailable
• 21:12
  for
• 21:12
  self
• 21:13
  abandonment,
• 21:14
  and
• 21:14
  I'll
• 21:14
  meet
• 21:14
  you
• 21:15
  in
• 21:15
  the
• 21:15
  next
• 21:15
  episode.