Latest / Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps / Phone Tap PODCAST: Non-Offensive Halloween
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Go one eight hundred duy away or go to one
- 0:02Speaker 1: eight hundred d yaway dot com. A great defense can
- 0:06Speaker 1: be the difference between a dismiss case or jail time
- 0:09Speaker 1: one eight hundred do you why away? He's another Jewels
- 0:14Speaker 1: on the twenties toy I'm moving ninety two point five. Hello, Hi,
- 0:20Speaker 1: is this Valve? This is Hi Valve. This is Mo Lester.
- 0:24Speaker 1: I was calling from the homeowners Association. How are you?
- 0:28Speaker 1: I'm fine. I did trim my hedges, like I said
- 0:30Speaker 1: in a letter. Is that what this is about? Oh no,
- 0:33Speaker 1: this isn't about any hedges. I'm just calling residents in
- 0:36Speaker 1: the neighborhood in regards to the upcoming Halloween holiday because
- 0:39Speaker 1: we're going to be doing things a little bit differently
- 0:41Speaker 1: in the neighborhood. What you mean by difference, Well, as
- 0:46Speaker 1: I'm sure you understand, with today's explosive social climate, we're
- 0:51Speaker 1: trying to be as inclusive and respectful of other people's
- 0:53Speaker 1: feelings as possible this Halloween. Oh well, I don't I understand. Okay,
- 0:58Speaker 1: I don't want to send anybody shore, of course, who
- 1:01Speaker 1: does anyway, we don't want to offin anybody with any
- 1:04Speaker 1: over the top Halloween displays this year, Like, for example,
- 1:08Speaker 1: we don't want anybody to be using blood and gore
- 1:11Speaker 1: and their decorations. Nothing too violent. Oh well, I understand that.
- 1:15Speaker 1: I mean I don't think kids should be looking at
- 1:17Speaker 1: that anyway. So so basically, no images of ghosts, goblins, schools, gremlins,
- 1:22Speaker 1: garden gnomes. Basically, if it starts with a G, I
- 1:26Speaker 1: would avoid using it as a decoration. Ghosts and goblins
- 1:31Speaker 1: and ghoul this is all just normal lean stuff. Well,
- 1:35Speaker 1: they are all extremely offensive and scary. Today's children are
- 1:40Speaker 1: very sensitive and weak, and they don't want terrifying images
- 1:43Speaker 1: thrust in their faces. Are you serious? What are we
- 1:47Speaker 1: supposed to decorate with? Well, that is a great question.
- 1:51Speaker 1: Let's say you wanted to put up an image of
- 1:52Speaker 1: a witch. Okay, you can't use an actual witch, but
- 1:57Speaker 1: you can leave the broom. Can just put a room
- 2:01Speaker 1: on the front of my house. Yes, it infers that
- 2:03Speaker 1: a witch has been there before, but there's no scary
- 2:06Speaker 1: image of a witch. You can just have a room
- 2:09Speaker 1: outside and infer that you're decorating. That's themmest thing I've
- 2:13Speaker 1: ever heard. Well, actually, I think it actually gives a
- 2:15Speaker 1: little bit a mystery to it. You could open up
- 2:17Speaker 1: the door and say, oh, look, everybody, a witch has
- 2:19Speaker 1: just been here. You can see by the broom. That
- 2:22Speaker 1: doesn't even it doesn't work. You're making rules that are
- 2:25Speaker 1: outrageously stupid. Well, unfortunately, these are the times we live in,
- 2:29Speaker 1: and you'll find four hundred dollars for any decorations that
- 2:32Speaker 1: are deemed too offensive. Four hundred dollars. You have got
- 2:36Speaker 1: to be kidding me. You are taking all the fun
- 2:38Speaker 1: out of Halloween. You absolutely can't do this. Okay, well,
- 2:41Speaker 1: I haven't touched on another thing yet. What the hell
- 2:44Speaker 1: are you going to do now? What are you taking away?
- 2:46Speaker 1: There's nothing left? Well, we've decided that the maiming and
- 2:49Speaker 1: torturing of pumpkins will also not be allowed this year.
- 2:52Speaker 1: Maiming and torturing pumpkins. I don't even understand what that means.
- 2:57Speaker 1: It happens every single Halloween, stabbing and gutting of pumpkins
- 3:01Speaker 1: and then leaving their rotting corpses on your doorstep, sort
- 3:05Speaker 1: of like a sick trophy. We won't be allowing that
- 3:07Speaker 1: this year. Okay, oh my gosh. Everybody carves pumpkins and Halloween.
- 3:11Speaker 1: That's what you do. You put a candle in. Well,
- 3:14Speaker 1: think about all the torture that they've gone through. How
- 3:16Speaker 1: would you feel? Could you just ask me how I
- 3:18Speaker 1: would I feel at I was a damn pumpkin? Yes
- 3:20Speaker 1: I did. How would you feel? Probably not very good?
- 3:23Speaker 1: Are you a freaking moron? This is a tradition, you know,
- 3:27Speaker 1: Slavery was a tradition at this country at one point too,
- 3:30Speaker 1: but thankfully we moved on from that. Right, Oh my god,
- 3:34Speaker 1: you're comparing slavery to carbon a pumpkin. Well, we're just
- 3:38Speaker 1: trying to be respectful of people's feelings. Who's looking after
- 3:41Speaker 1: my ceilings? Because right now I feel like killing you.
- 3:44Speaker 1: Oh well, somebody who would do that to a pumpkin
- 3:46Speaker 1: probably would say that, wouldn't they? You know what, score this,
- 3:51Speaker 1: go ahead and find me. I don't give a damn.
- 3:54Speaker 1: I'm going to put so many murdered pumpkins on my
- 3:57Speaker 1: porch they're gonna have to bring in the CFI Unit
- 4:00Speaker 1: to their bloods. God, you know what else, I'm gonna
- 4:04Speaker 1: have Frankenstein skul skeleton right on top of my nailbox,
- 4:09Speaker 1: so everybody that comes down this street and see him
- 4:11Speaker 1: getting his undead so oh, now, all of a sudden
- 4:17Speaker 1: you think this is funny, I'm gonna have a scene
- 4:21Speaker 1: on my front yard that this town will never recover from.
- 4:24Speaker 1: Children will have to go to therapy. Do you get
- 4:28Speaker 1: what I'm saying to you feeling, yes, I do, laughing
- 4:32Speaker 1: because this is a frank phone call. What this is
- 4:37Speaker 1: actually Jewel from Brook and Jewel in the morning doing
- 4:39Speaker 1: a phone tap on you. No, your husband Ron set
- 4:45Speaker 1: you up. Oh my god, you know I thought I
- 4:50Speaker 1: recognized your voice. It's so stupid. I didn't want Oh
- 4:53Speaker 1: my god, that's awful, very very angry there at the end,
- 4:58Speaker 1: I am sorry. I think Halloween's figurite there. Yeah, obviously