Latest / She Rises with Ashy & Tijana / Friday FAREWELL😋GOODBYE Grow and Glow, ins and outs, 2024 reflection and HELLO NEW NAME (new co-host, new conversations and NEW SEASON!!

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Friday FAREWELL😋GOODBYE Grow and Glow, ins and outs, 2024 reflection and HELLO NEW NAME (new co-host, new conversations and NEW SEASON!! · She Rises with Ashy & Tijana

0:05
Speaker 1: Apologie Production, Growing Glows Twelve Days of Christmas.
0:14
Speaker 2: Welcome back to Grow and Glow. It's our final day
0:16
Speaker 2: of the Twelve Days of Christmas. I've got Katie, my
0:20
Speaker 2: producer here. Thanks for joining me.
0:21
Speaker 1: Thank you for having me.
0:23
Speaker 2: It's like the last episode of the Twelve Days of Christmas,
0:25
Speaker 2: but the last episode of Growing Glow. Yes, out of
0:28
Speaker 2: all the twelve Days of Christmas, what's been your favorite episode?
0:32
Speaker 1: My favorite episode was with Carlia Lake.
0:35
Speaker 2: True. Yes, I knew you're going to say that.
0:37
Speaker 1: Thanks worker. Yeah, She's so interesting. I could literally talk
0:42
Speaker 1: to her all day.
0:42
Speaker 2: I love that she's such an open book, Like she
0:45
Speaker 2: literally answered all the questions I had, and she was
0:47
Speaker 2: so free to talk about it.
0:49
Speaker 1: And I think as a woman as well, like I
0:51
Speaker 1: think there's a kind of assumption that you're like, oh, no,
0:54
Speaker 1: that would be awful, But then when you hear a talk,
0:56
Speaker 1: there's kind of a part of me that's.
0:58
Speaker 2: Like, oh, I know, it sounds exciting. Yeah, especially because
1:03
Speaker 2: she is very picky on her client and she can
1:05
Speaker 2: literally look up their background, look what they look like.
1:07
Speaker 2: She's really investigate who she's going to go and spend
1:10
Speaker 2: time with. Blew my mind.
1:12
Speaker 1: How little sex she actually has though. Yeah. It's a
1:15
Speaker 1: lot about connection, yeah, and about conversations crazy, and about
1:18
Speaker 1: men being heard, which is it's so interesting because we
1:21
Speaker 1: think that men don't need that.
1:22
Speaker 2: I so do. Yeah, yeah, alrighty, well let's get into it.
1:26
Speaker 2: I thought we'd start off today's episode with ins and out,
1:29
Speaker 2: so things that we want to bring in too twenty
1:31
Speaker 2: twenty five and things you want to say goodbye to.
1:33
Speaker 2: So my one is more fun and less pressure and
1:37
Speaker 2: every day living. A lot more fun brought into my
1:40
Speaker 2: everyday life. And if it doesn't bring me joy and
1:42
Speaker 2: make me excited for it, then it's just not meant
1:45
Speaker 2: for me. I feel like I've been in business for
1:47
Speaker 2: a very long time and I feel like you have
1:49
Speaker 2: to do things you don't want to do. But I'm
1:51
Speaker 2: in this place now, maybe call me privilege where I
1:54
Speaker 2: actually get to choose what I do and where I
1:56
Speaker 2: spend my time, and I want it to be fun.
1:57
Speaker 1: Yeah.
1:58
Speaker 2: And that's why I'm putting so much into this podcast,
1:59
Speaker 2: because I literally love coming up here so much and
2:02
Speaker 2: I go back home just so excited and like all
2:05
Speaker 2: this inspired energy, and I want more of that.
2:07
Speaker 1: I love the quote do what you love and the
2:10
Speaker 1: money will come. So true, And I totally get you know,
2:13
Speaker 1: we have bills to pay and kids to feed and
2:16
Speaker 1: all the rest of it. But yeah, do what you
2:18
Speaker 1: love and the money will come. I'm such a believer
2:20
Speaker 1: in that. And I say that to my kids as
2:21
Speaker 1: well when they say, oh, you know the teachers at school,
2:24
Speaker 1: so you got to have a backup plan, And I'm like,
2:26
Speaker 1: do what you love. Yeah, like your backup plan you
2:29
Speaker 1: most probably won't need if you're so passionate about what
2:33
Speaker 1: you're doing.
2:33
Speaker 2: And isn't the dream to be able to do something
2:36
Speaker 2: you love and make amazing money off it. I would
2:38
Speaker 2: hate to be working in nine to five just to
2:40
Speaker 2: pay my bills. But that's what I got taught in
2:42
Speaker 2: school as well. It's like you go to UNI or
2:44
Speaker 2: you get a job to pay your bills. That's life.
2:46
Speaker 1: But no, look at things like Facebook. Like when Mark
2:49
Speaker 1: Zuckerberg started up Facebook, he didn't know how he was
2:51
Speaker 1: going to monetize it. He had a passion for what
2:54
Speaker 1: he was doing. He knew that people were going to
2:56
Speaker 1: use it and love it, and then them monetizing came later.
3:00
Speaker 2: Yeah, so cool. So that's my inn. My out is
3:03
Speaker 2: abandoning myself. I'm not suppressing or allowing myself to have
3:07
Speaker 2: the full experiences, even if it's uncomfortable and no more distracting.
3:10
Speaker 2: So what I mean by that is I spoke about
3:12
Speaker 2: it in a previous episode. I realized when I was
3:15
Speaker 2: feeling something, I would distract myself away from it through food,
3:20
Speaker 2: through scrolling, or through being busy because it just got
3:23
Speaker 2: so uncomfortable, or the kids were there. I just like,
3:26
Speaker 2: do you know what to do with all these heavier emotions?
3:28
Speaker 2: And I worked three months with a life coach, and
3:31
Speaker 2: she's a feminine body life coach, and I've just learned
3:35
Speaker 2: tools now how to soothe myself in those moments to
3:38
Speaker 2: not have to carry them around so heavily. So now
3:41
Speaker 2: when I feel something, I fully allow myself to have
3:43
Speaker 2: the whole experience. But I don't sit there either. And
3:45
Speaker 2: if I don't, if I go to my phone, or
3:47
Speaker 2: if I go and have a snack or get into work,
3:50
Speaker 2: I'm literally abandoning myself. I'm not only abandoning myself as
3:53
Speaker 2: an full grown a woman, I'm abanding my inner child
3:55
Speaker 2: as well. I look at my kids, I'm like, I
3:57
Speaker 2: would never do that to them, So why am I
3:59
Speaker 2: doing that to myself. So that's out, like, I'm not
4:01
Speaker 2: doing that anymore.
4:02
Speaker 1: Feel the feels it's so important. It's like when we
4:05
Speaker 1: were kids it was don't cry, stop crying. Now it's
4:09
Speaker 1: like we know how important it is to cry and
4:11
Speaker 1: let all of that out, and even the horrible feelings,
4:13
Speaker 1: the yucky feelings that things like the jealousy or the
4:16
Speaker 1: y you do your own head in going that's not
4:19
Speaker 1: a feeling that I should be feeling, Yes.
4:21
Speaker 2: It is. It's valid. We all feel like that sometimes,
4:25
Speaker 2: and if it doesn't come up, if you put shame
4:27
Speaker 2: around it and you push it down, it will come up.
4:29
Speaker 2: It will just come up in a really ugly way
4:31
Speaker 2: that you're not proud of. You'll take it out on
4:33
Speaker 2: someone and you'll lash out. You'll have a big explosion.
4:35
Speaker 2: You'll be like, holy shit, what was that? But it's
4:38
Speaker 2: because you've suppressed and shamed. If you just bring it
4:40
Speaker 2: up and allow it to be there and still love
4:42
Speaker 2: on yourself, it moves a lot quicker and you just
4:45
Speaker 2: get to get it out of your system. Doesn't mean
4:47
Speaker 2: that you are a jealous person. It's you are having
4:49
Speaker 2: feelings of jealousy, and we all experience that yes, it's normal,
4:53
Speaker 2: all right, what's your in and out?
4:55
Speaker 1: So my inn is slowing down, So not feeling like
4:59
Speaker 1: you have to hustle all the time, you have to
5:01
Speaker 1: work all the time, allowing yourself to be slower, to
5:05
Speaker 1: not race around having to do a million things and
5:08
Speaker 1: actually go to yourself. Is that gonna make my life harder?
5:11
Speaker 1: Right now? With the kids? You go, okay, they have
5:15
Speaker 1: to have a nutritious dinner tonight. But if you're rushing
5:18
Speaker 1: around doing after school activities and you know that you're
5:21
Speaker 1: going to get hardly any time, grab them some over eats. Yeah, like,
5:26
Speaker 1: just allow that and instead of giving yourself a hard
5:28
Speaker 1: time about it, go okay, is this going to make
5:30
Speaker 1: my life easier right now?
5:31
Speaker 2: Yes? It is? Okay? Great, or in that moment, it's like,
5:34
Speaker 2: what's more important to me? It's connection, It's just being
5:36
Speaker 2: with my kids.
5:37
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, So slowing down, doing less, not saying
5:40
Speaker 1: yes to everything you're invited to, not like it's okay
5:43
Speaker 1: to say no, And the reason is I just want
5:45
Speaker 1: to be at home in my pajamas time that's okay?
5:47
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, what's that saying? The people who matter don't mind.
5:51
Speaker 2: The people who mind don't matter. Yes, I love that
5:54
Speaker 2: saying because it's so true your true friends like of
5:56
Speaker 2: course babes stay home, like how do you?
5:58
Speaker 1: I'm being honest as well, not feeling like you need
6:00
Speaker 1: to make up an excuse the amount of times you go, oh,
6:02
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry, I can't do that. My dog is sick,
6:06
Speaker 1: you know, like, no, just I've got people and honesty.
6:09
Speaker 1: I really don't feel like doing that tonight, but thank
6:11
Speaker 1: you so much for inviting me anyway.
6:13
Speaker 2: Yeah, one hundred percent. I love that.
6:15
Speaker 1: My out is comparing yourself to other people. So instead
6:19
Speaker 1: of looking at other people and going, oh I want
6:21
Speaker 1: to be like that, or they're doing this, or why
6:22
Speaker 1: aren't I at that stage, compare yourself to you last.
6:26
Speaker 2: Week, good advice. I love that one. Mine's more Steakcase.
6:32
Speaker 2: I said this last year and we really didn't prioritize it.
6:36
Speaker 2: I had stay Case coming out to the podcast. But
6:37
Speaker 2: for Steve and my kids, I want to just like
6:39
Speaker 2: book a farmhouse on a weekend and book an MV
6:41
Speaker 2: and b like down the coast, just more little things
6:44
Speaker 2: to look forward to to break up the working weeks
6:47
Speaker 2: and months. So that's my inn and out caring so
6:50
Speaker 2: much of what other people think. I feel like this
6:53
Speaker 2: is a gradual thing and every year I do get better,
6:56
Speaker 2: but I still have found there's been moments, even particularly lately,
7:00
Speaker 2: you know, where people have said false things about me
7:02
Speaker 2: online or said really hopeful things. I don't lose sleepover
7:06
Speaker 2: it anymore and I don't cry about it and it
7:08
Speaker 2: doesn't like consume me, but there's still that moment of like, damn,
7:12
Speaker 2: that sucks that they think that, And I don't want
7:14
Speaker 2: to get online and like defend myself or whatever, but
7:17
Speaker 2: there's still that little niggle. It's like a scratch that
7:20
Speaker 2: still triggers me of like that sucks. I still care
7:24
Speaker 2: that people think that about me.
7:25
Speaker 1: I think that's an impossible thing to ever not care,
7:28
Speaker 1: no matter how much you tell yourself you are a human.
7:32
Speaker 1: But often some of that negative stuff, it's sometimes saying
7:36
Speaker 1: more about them than it is about you.
7:38
Speaker 2: It's nice to feel the progress of it not consuming anymore,
7:41
Speaker 2: because if say, like three or five years ago, I
7:44
Speaker 2: would be in bed and like wouldn't be able to
7:46
Speaker 2: work and it would just destroy me. Whereas now I'm
7:48
Speaker 2: just like, oh damn, that sucks, and might have a
7:51
Speaker 2: little vent to someone, but then I'll move on and you.
7:53
Speaker 1: Know the other thing, and this is sometimes easier said
7:55
Speaker 1: than done, but just stop reading that stuff. Yeah, like,
7:58
Speaker 1: don't read it.
7:58
Speaker 2: I don't read gossip pages or anything like that anymore.
8:00
Speaker 2: I think it's recently it's been people screenshotting me and
8:02
Speaker 2: be like, have you seen this about you? And then
8:04
Speaker 2: it's in my because I do reply to all my dms. Yeah,
8:07
Speaker 2: but otherwise I used to go and read forums and stuff,
8:10
Speaker 2: and I'm like, it was just so bad for my
8:12
Speaker 2: mental health.
8:13
Speaker 1: So no, thank you, no, but you don't read them.
8:15
Speaker 1: You don't know, and then you can't hurt me.
8:17
Speaker 2: That's so true.
8:18
Speaker 1: My next one is remembering that life is right now.
8:22
Speaker 2: Oh, such a good one.
8:23
Speaker 1: So instead of always thinking about what's next. When I
8:26
Speaker 1: have this much money, where my business is doing this well,
8:28
Speaker 1: when the kids are doing this, enjoy the right now.
8:32
Speaker 1: Remember that life is right now.
8:34
Speaker 2: Never get this time back.
8:35
Speaker 1: My next out is worrying that you're not where you
8:39
Speaker 1: should be at this age.
8:40
Speaker 2: Oh okay, I think we focus a lot on age.
8:43
Speaker 1: It's like whether I should be married at this stage,
8:45
Speaker 1: I should be having children at this stage, I should
8:47
Speaker 1: be doing this with my career at this stage. And
8:49
Speaker 1: I saw something recently about Ricky Gervaise. Obviously he's a
8:54
Speaker 1: very successful comedian, but he didn't become a successful comedian
8:58
Speaker 1: until he was in his forties.
8:59
Speaker 2: Wow.
9:00
Speaker 1: I screenshotted a post that he put up which said,
9:04
Speaker 1: when I was in my twenties, I had a cleaning
9:06
Speaker 1: job to pay for rehearsals. If I got a gig,
9:09
Speaker 1: I'd make my own posters and push the equipment to
9:12
Speaker 1: the venue in a shopping trolley. Hope is amazing far out.
9:16
Speaker 2: That's so cool. I remember seeing a post it was
9:18
Speaker 2: like Vera Wayne didn't start she was forty two or something,
9:20
Speaker 2: and there's a whole list of really successful people and
9:24
Speaker 2: they were all started in their forties. It's really cool.
9:26
Speaker 1: Yeah, So don't give yourself a hard time about your
9:28
Speaker 1: age and we're at in your life, because you'll get
9:30
Speaker 1: there when you're ready. I mean, it's right, and age
9:33
Speaker 1: is just a number.
9:34
Speaker 2: And it's also cool that, like, even if you've made
9:36
Speaker 2: it in your career and you're feeling like you've achieved
9:38
Speaker 2: and take lots to boxes, you can actually change your mind.
9:41
Speaker 2: If you get to thirty eight and you've achieved everything
9:42
Speaker 2: and you're like I feel like I should be happy here,
9:45
Speaker 2: but you want to do something completely different than cool,
9:47
Speaker 2: It's not too late to start. I never thought i'd
9:48
Speaker 2: be podcasting this much. Yeah, and I love it more
9:51
Speaker 2: than anything I've ever done before.
9:52
Speaker 1: And remembering your achievements as well. So you might have
9:55
Speaker 1: a previous job where you did really well and you
9:57
Speaker 1: did this, that and the other, and instead of going,
9:59
Speaker 1: oh that was the old me, that was the last job,
10:02
Speaker 1: I'm not that anymore.
10:03
Speaker 2: Yes you are.
10:04
Speaker 1: You still got those two allow yourself to take them.
10:07
Speaker 2: We're gone anywhere, yep. Ins more face to face connection
10:12
Speaker 2: in my community. I love the online world, I love podcasting,
10:15
Speaker 2: but I really want to run some more events and
10:17
Speaker 2: like intimate ones, do a live show, dream to go
10:21
Speaker 2: on a tour like I really just love more face
10:23
Speaker 2: to face. It's just even when I have guests on here,
10:26
Speaker 2: compared to if we have a guest on like an
10:28
Speaker 2: online platform, it's just so much better face to face.
10:30
Speaker 2: You can feel people's energy and just get to spend
10:32
Speaker 2: that time together. And I think since COVID, we're all
10:35
Speaker 2: craving more connection. So I want to incorporate that into
10:38
Speaker 2: everything I do next year.
10:39
Speaker 1: And allowing yourself to enjoy other people's stories and what
10:43
Speaker 1: they've got to say as well.
10:44
Speaker 2: So true, everyone's got a story. Hey yeah yeah. Out
10:48
Speaker 2: Relationships that can't communicate respectfully, kindly and effectively. I feel
10:54
Speaker 2: like sometimes whether it's family members or friends or intimate relationships,
10:57
Speaker 2: it's like, oh, that's just who they are, Like you
10:59
Speaker 2: know they're aggressive like that, or you know they're going
11:02
Speaker 2: through a hard time, but it's like, where's the best
11:05
Speaker 2: boundary your standards of how you want to be treated.
11:08
Speaker 2: And I think Steve and I've been together it will
11:10
Speaker 2: be seventeen years next June, and there's been so many
11:13
Speaker 2: conversations and arguments, but like from every single one of them,
11:16
Speaker 2: we have learned how to communicate more effectively and more
11:19
Speaker 2: kindly and more respectfully, Like we wouldn't have a relationship
11:21
Speaker 2: if we didn't. It's not about being perfect or even
11:24
Speaker 2: just owning if you've lashed out and been like, hey, gosh,
11:26
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, sorry I said that. I was really angry
11:28
Speaker 2: and I've really needed to take a fucking breath, like
11:30
Speaker 2: please forgive me. But if someone just isn't taking any
11:33
Speaker 2: responsibility and that's just how they are, I just don't
11:36
Speaker 2: want relationships like that in my life anymore. I don't
11:39
Speaker 2: think I deserve to be treated or spoken to like that.
11:42
Speaker 2: So it's been a big boundary that I want to
11:44
Speaker 2: put in place. Now life's tis shut, it really is.
11:47
Speaker 2: And when you have people in your life that treat
11:49
Speaker 2: you so kindly, Like I've got a couple of girlfriends
11:52
Speaker 2: that like Tianna and Megsie. I've learned so much from
11:55
Speaker 2: them and how to communicate kindly. But still they've got
11:58
Speaker 2: such strong boundaries with what's okay and what's not, and
12:01
Speaker 2: I've really learned from them and I've improved so much.
12:04
Speaker 2: When you have people like that in your life, that
12:05
Speaker 2: highlights the other ones that are the opposite, and you're like,
12:08
Speaker 2: why am I allowing this? Yeah, you normally allow it
12:11
Speaker 2: because you don't think you're worthy of anything else. And
12:13
Speaker 2: when I was growing up, I didn't think I was
12:15
Speaker 2: worthy of being loved in that kind of beautiful way.
12:18
Speaker 2: But now I've got people that love me like that,
12:19
Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't need to be spoken to like that.
12:22
Speaker 2: So that's my out.
12:23
Speaker 1: I'm making sure that everything that's going in is coming
12:26
Speaker 1: from both sides as well. Like everybody's got friends where
12:29
Speaker 1: you go hang on. I always invite them to things.
12:31
Speaker 1: I always call them. I'm always the one that messages
12:34
Speaker 1: I need to work both ways.
12:35
Speaker 2: Oh, it's two people in every dynamic. A.
12:39
Speaker 1: Yeah, So my next in is remembering where you are
12:44
Speaker 1: right now is where you once wanted to be. So true,
12:48
Speaker 1: it's okay to have goals and want to grow, but
12:50
Speaker 1: remember back ten years. Everything that you have now is
12:55
Speaker 1: what you probably dreamt off back then.
12:57
Speaker 2: Yeah. If you could go back in that time and
12:59
Speaker 2: see your future, be like, that's a fucking cool life,
13:01
Speaker 2: Like I did that.
13:03
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, once upon a time, this is what I
13:05
Speaker 1: dreamt of. And it's not taking away from the fact
13:08
Speaker 1: that you still want goals and you still want to
13:09
Speaker 1: move forward, and you still want things in the future,
13:12
Speaker 1: but just remembering that it's a cool thing to remember
13:15
Speaker 1: and enjoying that success that where you are right now
13:17
Speaker 1: where you once wanted to.
13:18
Speaker 2: Your past self would be stoked to be where you
13:20
Speaker 2: are right now. Yeah.
13:22
Speaker 1: My next out is wearing too much fragrance.
13:27
Speaker 2: Oh yes, yeah.
13:28
Speaker 1: I love scented moisturizes, I love Hideaway and I will
13:31
Speaker 1: always wear that. But I was also then wearing a
13:34
Speaker 1: body spray, and then I was also wearing perfume, and
13:37
Speaker 1: then I just felt like it was too much and
13:39
Speaker 1: it was overpowering. It was giving me headaches, and I'm like, no,
13:43
Speaker 1: choose one.
13:44
Speaker 2: Like most days I only wear custard, and I get
13:46
Speaker 2: so many compliments still like what perfume r I'm like,
13:48
Speaker 2: it's literally discusted. Or if I am wearing like in
13:51
Speaker 2: winter from wearing long sea stuff, I was more spray perfume,
13:53
Speaker 2: not wear custard. My legs don't need to be as moisturized,
13:56
Speaker 2: but you don't. Yeah, you don't need to lay them, no.
13:58
Speaker 1: And it's just remembering as well that other people can
14:02
Speaker 1: smell that on you, Like you stop smelling on yourself,
14:04
Speaker 1: so you'll put per everyone in the morning, you can't
14:06
Speaker 1: smell it for the rest of the day everyone else can.
14:07
Speaker 1: I but everyone else can. And then you think that
14:09
Speaker 1: you haven't got it on anymore, and so then you
14:11
Speaker 1: put more on and then it's overkilled.
14:13
Speaker 2: Yeah. Nice. Like in I feel like I'm already doing this,
14:16
Speaker 2: but even more so, I always just want to do
14:18
Speaker 2: like that a little bit better. That little bit more
14:20
Speaker 2: is eating more organic food and more animal products, because
14:24
Speaker 2: since I've changed this way of eating, I feel so
14:27
Speaker 2: much better. I feel like for the last fifteen years,
14:29
Speaker 2: I've been like seventy thirty healthy eating balanced, cleaner options.
14:34
Speaker 2: But now I'm probably ninety percent organic food and whole food,
14:39
Speaker 2: with like a ten percent in there, which is like
14:41
Speaker 2: when I go out for date night or I get
14:42
Speaker 2: a random yoche with taj or I have a clean treat.
14:45
Speaker 2: But most of my food is organic now and I
14:48
Speaker 2: want to even improve that even more. So I just
14:50
Speaker 2: feel so good. And for me as I get older,
14:53
Speaker 2: it's just about longevity. I really want my body to
14:55
Speaker 2: be thriving some around my kids and my grandkids.
14:59
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think putting more effort into food preps.
15:01
Speaker 1: So it's spending the time finding those nice ingredients and
15:05
Speaker 1: remembering what to do with them or finding recipes and
15:08
Speaker 1: rather than being busy and then just grabbing some whatever shit.
15:13
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so easy to do. I get it. And
15:16
Speaker 2: then out feeling shame around my achievements and not celebrating
15:19
Speaker 2: my wins in fear of upsetting other people in life,
15:23
Speaker 2: in business, in financials. And I said this on a
15:26
Speaker 2: previous episode that when I see other women celebrating their wins,
15:30
Speaker 2: saying I made this much money in my launch, or
15:32
Speaker 2: I've just bought this new car or flying business class here.
15:35
Speaker 2: I'm always so inspired. I don't get jealous or envy
15:38
Speaker 2: of that stuff for me is like, wow, she did that.
15:42
Speaker 2: That's possible for me too. I find it really inspiring.
15:44
Speaker 2: So I'm like, why do I dim my light in
15:48
Speaker 2: fear of upsetting someone where I could be that person
15:51
Speaker 2: that inspires someone else to live like this through hard
15:53
Speaker 2: work and finding your passions. Like, I know it's not
15:55
Speaker 2: for everyone, but I'm kind of sick of hiding and
15:58
Speaker 2: carrying shame when I do well and there's an achievement
16:00
Speaker 2: and I don't feel like even really celebrate it myself.
16:03
Speaker 2: I want to celebrate it myself and then also be
16:05
Speaker 2: an inspiration for other people too, So I'm going to
16:07
Speaker 2: bring more of that in. It feels very edgy for me,
16:10
Speaker 2: but that's cool. Why not.
16:11
Speaker 1: It's a really good place to be in because we've
16:13
Speaker 1: definitely all felt that when we go, oh it's all
16:15
Speaker 1: right for them, like yeah that, or they're rubbing it
16:17
Speaker 1: in your face so they're bragging, but it feels so
16:20
Speaker 1: nice to go good on them, Yeah, yeah, good on
16:23
Speaker 1: them for being able to do that. And then I
16:25
Speaker 1: want to do that too, So how am I going
16:27
Speaker 1: to get.
16:27
Speaker 2: There at the end of the day. It's a projection.
16:29
Speaker 2: So when I used to have those thoughts of like, oh,
16:31
Speaker 2: of course she's got that, or wow, she's bragging or
16:33
Speaker 2: rubbing in your face, you're judging them, but you're actually
16:35
Speaker 2: judging yourself. Now that I've like switched, my mind still
16:38
Speaker 2: around and I find it really inspiring. It just feels
16:41
Speaker 2: so different. But I'm just all about being a cheerleader
16:44
Speaker 2: for women and celebrating them, and I think there's room
16:46
Speaker 2: for all of us. There's no need to put down
16:49
Speaker 2: what they're celebrating. Like there was this girl on TikTok
16:51
Speaker 2: the other day and she was like, I made a
16:52
Speaker 2: hundred thousand dollars in my first twenty four hours of
16:54
Speaker 2: Black Friday, and she was crying. It was three times
16:57
Speaker 2: more than what she made last year. And I didn't
16:59
Speaker 2: know who she was, but I was like, fuck, yeah,
17:01
Speaker 2: I go you. This is amazing. Yeah, And like all
17:03
Speaker 2: the comments are really supportive, and it's like, this is
17:05
Speaker 2: what I mean. This is really cool that she's celebrating herself,
17:08
Speaker 2: she's sharing it with her community, and we all get
17:10
Speaker 2: to support her in that.
17:11
Speaker 1: Yeah.
17:11
Speaker 2: So beautiful.
17:12
Speaker 1: Those moments of jealousy as well, are so normal, so normal,
17:16
Speaker 1: we'll felt them, but it feels so much nicer to
17:19
Speaker 1: be able to go, oh, okay, so I'm jealous right now,
17:22
Speaker 1: So what do I need to do about my life?
17:24
Speaker 1: Because it's actually not about that person and what they're doing.
17:26
Speaker 1: It's like what do I need to do?
17:28
Speaker 2: Yeah? And jealousy and envy is just highlighting what you want.
17:32
Speaker 2: So anytime I have felt jealousy or envy, I'm just like, oh, interesting, Okay,
17:37
Speaker 2: it's not about them.
17:38
Speaker 1: I'm actually wanting that. I'm desiring that. Well, what are
17:40
Speaker 1: you doing about it? Yeah?
17:41
Speaker 2: Are you putting in the work they're doing? Have you
17:43
Speaker 2: seen what they do to get there? Are you willing
17:45
Speaker 2: to sacrifice what they've sacrificed to get there? Is it
17:48
Speaker 2: that important to you? And when you start asking yourself
17:50
Speaker 2: those questions, you can get to the bottom of it. Yeah,
17:52
Speaker 2: and then you can change what you're doing. So I'm
17:55
Speaker 2: not carrying more shame around my success and my achievements. Good.
17:58
Speaker 1: Yes, My next in is putting yourself first. Oh yeah,
18:03
Speaker 1: and I think especially for mum, we put everybody else first.
18:07
Speaker 1: It's all about the kids. It's about what they want
18:09
Speaker 1: to do. It's so important for you to take that
18:12
Speaker 1: time out. Don't feel guilty. No, go and do what
18:16
Speaker 1: it is that you need to do for yourself. Go
18:17
Speaker 1: for a massage, sit on your own for a bit.
18:21
Speaker 1: Like I think kids also thrive when you're happy and
18:25
Speaker 1: you are doing scent.
18:27
Speaker 2: They feel our energy when our cups forward overflows to them.
18:30
Speaker 2: I love the quote put your own life jacket on first.
18:34
Speaker 2: It's a good one, isn't it.
18:35
Speaker 1: Whenever they say that on an aeroplane, when they do
18:37
Speaker 1: that safety thing, you're like, of course I wouldn't do that.
18:40
Speaker 1: Of course I'm going to put it on my baby first.
18:42
Speaker 1: And it's like, well, no, you have to put it
18:43
Speaker 1: on your celf phone and actually help them, because if
18:45
Speaker 1: you can't help them, yeah, if you're dead. My next
18:48
Speaker 1: out is deciding not to buy the thing you love
18:51
Speaker 1: when you see it, Oh okay. I feel like I've
18:54
Speaker 1: done this all of my life, where I have seen
18:58
Speaker 1: something and been like, oh, it's a bit expensive, it's
19:01
Speaker 1: not on sale, but I'm like, I really love it.
19:03
Speaker 1: And you know, when you walk away from something, you're like, no,
19:06
Speaker 1: be sensible, you can't afford it, right, now you need
19:09
Speaker 1: to wait till payday or whatever it might be, and
19:11
Speaker 1: then you don't find it again. So when you have
19:13
Speaker 1: got money and you're like, I really loved it, I
19:16
Speaker 1: did it recently. Actually, I saw some barstools and I
19:21
Speaker 1: was like, oh, my goodness, I love those barstels. And
19:23
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, they're really expensive, and I've got
19:26
Speaker 1: bartels at home and there's nothing wrong with them, but
19:28
Speaker 1: I really love those ones. I haven't stopped thinking about. Oh,
19:31
Speaker 1: and now I'm looking for new barstels because they are
19:34
Speaker 1: getting to the point where they need replacing. And I
19:37
Speaker 1: can't find those barstles.
19:39
Speaker 2: I wish I bought that, but I've.
19:40
Speaker 1: Drilled the internet and yeah, I can't find them. So
19:43
Speaker 1: buying that one thing instead of always bargain hunting and
19:47
Speaker 1: then putting up with the thing that you've bought really
19:50
Speaker 1: because you like the price the best, you don't actually
19:53
Speaker 1: love the product, no, And then you might end up
19:55
Speaker 1: with loads of those things that you half like because
19:59
Speaker 1: they were cheaper, and actually you've spent the same amount
20:01
Speaker 1: of money as you would have on that one thing
20:03
Speaker 1: that you really loved.
20:03
Speaker 2: Anyway, True, my inn is loving every part of me,
20:08
Speaker 2: and I've got a girlfriend that's really helped me with this,
20:10
Speaker 2: the things that I've carried shame over the years within
20:13
Speaker 2: my friendship groups or just with how I feel. She's
20:17
Speaker 2: bought a really playful aspect to it, and she's very
20:20
Speaker 2: similar to me. So when I was telling her about
20:23
Speaker 2: these things I carry shame for and she was like, oh,
20:25
Speaker 2: I'm like that, But the way she's worded it and
20:27
Speaker 2: how playful she is with it, I just love that
20:29
Speaker 2: about her. Son, I had this realization, I'm like, well,
20:32
Speaker 2: if I love that about her, why can't I love
20:33
Speaker 2: that about me. I don't have to carry shame around that.
20:36
Speaker 2: And I'll go into more details about it next year.
20:39
Speaker 2: I'm just in this space now. I'm like, I don't
20:41
Speaker 2: have to hate any part of me, and hating parts
20:44
Speaker 2: of myself it doesn't serve anyone all. That doesn't feel
20:47
Speaker 2: heavy for me. And I want my kids to know that, like,
20:49
Speaker 2: no one's perfect, and there'll be parts of them that
20:52
Speaker 2: they want to work on or they've got their own
20:54
Speaker 2: wounds that they can still love so hardly on themselves
20:57
Speaker 2: and love on other people for their wounds. Yeah, So
20:59
Speaker 2: that's my inn.
21:00
Speaker 1: And not seeing things as negatives as well, yeah, like
21:04
Speaker 1: viewing them differently. Oh, that's really bad about myself, Like
21:07
Speaker 1: I hate that I do that. It's like, well, no,
21:09
Speaker 1: actually that's part of me. Yes, And how can that
21:12
Speaker 1: be a more of a positive How has it served me?
21:14
Speaker 1: Like it's kept you safe for it's you know, helped
21:17
Speaker 1: you with something, putting a positive spin on it out
21:20
Speaker 1: taking things personally just because someone says something, it doesn't
21:23
Speaker 1: mean I have to take it on. Projection is a
21:25
Speaker 1: real thing, and a lot of the time it's not
21:27
Speaker 1: about me. It's different when it's constructive criticism, but you
21:30
Speaker 1: feel like you can feel through energy and tone when
21:33
Speaker 1: someone's projecting or if they're giving you constructive criticism. Yeah,
21:36
Speaker 1: and I'm all for constructive criticism, but yeah, I just
21:39
Speaker 1: I feel like I've just taken things so personally for
21:42
Speaker 1: so long. But a lot of the time, when someone
21:44
Speaker 1: projects something onto you, it's not even about you. It's
21:46
Speaker 1: just something they're feeling or they've been triggered all they
21:48
Speaker 1: don't know how to regulate, so they just like spit
21:51
Speaker 1: it out on you. So I've just noticed now that
21:53
Speaker 1: i feel like I'm more regulated, I can take a
21:55
Speaker 1: breath and like see if what it is and then
21:58
Speaker 1: not react to them instead just like ignore it or
22:00
Speaker 1: give them compassion or.
22:02
Speaker 2: Just like brush it aside. Because before I'd be like,
22:04
Speaker 2: oh my god, oh they said this about me, like
22:06
Speaker 2: even I know it's not true, and it would really
22:08
Speaker 2: upset me. Now I'm like, I don't have to take
22:11
Speaker 2: that on. It's not overthinking things. Yeah, even to the
22:14
Speaker 2: point where.
22:15
Speaker 1: I'll go to send a text message and then I'll
22:18
Speaker 1: look over it again and I'll be like, no, just
22:20
Speaker 1: send it, Just send it. Yeah.
22:22
Speaker 2: Yeah, so true, more emotional releasing, like somatically energetically, and
22:27
Speaker 2: then allowing I've kind of said it before, but allowing
22:29
Speaker 2: more of the feels to come up, but actually implementing
22:32
Speaker 2: and practicing all the tools I've learned from my coach,
22:35
Speaker 2: like making that just a part of what I do,
22:36
Speaker 2: like brushing my teeth. If I feel something, it's like, Okay,
22:38
Speaker 2: I'm going to do this, this and this, rather than
22:40
Speaker 2: pushing it to the cyber I'm going to really practice
22:43
Speaker 2: that in my week to week living.
22:45
Speaker 1: I've got one more place not giving yourself such a
22:48
Speaker 1: hard time.
22:49
Speaker 2: Oh that's nice.
22:50
Speaker 1: So when you go through your day, I feel like
22:52
Speaker 1: often I will have a conversation with somebody and then
22:56
Speaker 1: they'll leave and you go on your way and you're like, oh,
22:59
Speaker 1: should I said that? Like that, what did they think
23:01
Speaker 1: about this that I said? And it's like, no, it's said,
23:04
Speaker 1: it's done, move on because they're not thinking about it now.
23:08
Speaker 2: So why should I be making stuff up in your head?
23:10
Speaker 2: And then it expands and your spiral. Yeah, it takes
23:13
Speaker 2: over your whole day, and then it's like not even
23:14
Speaker 2: a big deal.
23:15
Speaker 1: Yeah, so just letting that stuff go and going okay, cool,
23:17
Speaker 1: Well that was five minutes ago and this is now,
23:19
Speaker 1: and let's move on. That's cool.
23:21
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a good one. This is officially the last
23:24
Speaker 2: grond Blow episode. Yes, there is no more gron Glow
23:27
Speaker 2: after this. However, it's not the end. If you guys
23:30
Speaker 2: missed previous episodes. We have a new podcast name which
23:33
Speaker 2: is really exciting. Stay tuned for our social media. I'll
23:36
Speaker 2: be posting a video to announce it. A new co host.
23:39
Speaker 2: I will have another reel for that introducing her, which
23:41
Speaker 2: is really cool, and so many new conversations. Our Friday
23:45
Speaker 2: episodes are going to be completely different. So in the
23:48
Speaker 2: last year, Katie's been cutting up like highlights of previous episodes. Yeah,
23:52
Speaker 2: whereas we've got a whole new theme and different topics
23:54
Speaker 2: and pillars that Friday will be And it's like a
23:56
Speaker 2: completely different look and feel and sides to our personalities,
24:00
Speaker 2: which I'm so excited for. And yeah, we've got some
24:03
Speaker 2: big plans where we hope to do some live events
24:05
Speaker 2: and we've got some programs you want to be bringing
24:07
Speaker 2: out and just different cool things that you guys get
24:10
Speaker 2: to be involved with. And I honestly couldn't be more excited.
24:12
Speaker 1: And when you say it's going to be totally different,
24:14
Speaker 1: there's still the same content, So still the same stuff
24:17
Speaker 1: that you are already loving listening to this podcast, just
24:20
Speaker 1: with a different person, different perspectives, And yeah, it's going
24:24
Speaker 1: to be bigger and better.
24:25
Speaker 2: It really is. You guys are gonna absolutely love it.
24:28
Speaker 2: But I also just want to say thank you so
24:30
Speaker 2: much to everyone who's tuned in. We couldn't do this
24:32
Speaker 2: without all of you, so thank you for being alongside
24:35
Speaker 2: the journey and the ride for us. And we're really
24:37
Speaker 2: excited for you guys to keep listening and learning from
24:39
Speaker 2: us and for us to be doing this together. Stay tuned.
24:42
Speaker 2: What Day to be Back January January sixth, I think
24:46
Speaker 2: you said. Hey. Therefore, after New Year's Eve on my
24:49
Speaker 2: social media, there'll be three reels going out and now
24:52
Speaker 2: it'cing the new co host, the new name, and then
24:55
Speaker 2: the day that our first episode goes live, and then
24:57
Speaker 2: we'll be in your ears three times every single week.
25:00
Speaker 1: Yeah, so excited.
25:02
Speaker 2: Merry Christmas, yes, Mary Christmas, have the best time with
25:04
Speaker 2: your family, enjoy all the food and happy New Year.
25:07
Speaker 2: Please be safe and can't wait to be back next year.
25:10
Speaker 1: Bye bye,