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The Professional Edge: When Your Marriage Needs More · Doing Marriage Well

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  Doing Marriage Well for May 7, 2026 The Professional Edge When your marriage
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  needs more The next level of help is professional.
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  That means a licensed therapist or counselor.
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  Sometimes you need this level of help. Or perhaps it's all your spouse will agree to.
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  Cost can be an issue here, as most insurance won't cover it.
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  But if it saves your marriage, it's worth the cost.
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  Training is no guarantee of skill, especially in a specific area like marriage.
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  I have friends who are licensed who are excellent. but I've also heard horror stories.
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  I would strongly advise you find a Christian who is that in more than name so
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  their advice doesn't contradict your core values.
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  If you're a blended family, a professional who understands step-parenting dynamics is a huge plus.
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  A personal recommendation is a big help if you know someone who has walked this
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  path. Or ask your pastor if they know someone.
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  Many professionals will do a lower-cost first session or partial session to
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  help you see if you are a good fit.
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  Don't be shy to ask what you need to know or about saying, I think we need someone
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  else. I assure you, they will not take it personally.
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  Doing this online via Zoom is possible, but in the U.S. you can only do that
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  with a professional in your state.
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  Still, this allows you to meet from the comfort of your home,
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  which may help you feel more comfortable, and it usually saves money.
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  I've heard some positive things about Regain. There's a link in the show notes.
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  I'm not affiliated with them in any way. I ran through their intake form, and it looked good.
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  You can specify you want a Christian, and you can also specify the person's
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  gender if you want. They do couples or individuals.
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  If you go the professional route, you should have a clear understanding of what
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  you want and what a positive outcome would look like.
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  That can change as you move forward, but it's good to specify your goal up front.
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  If you don't feel you have this, make it one of the first things you do when you meet.
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  As with any form of marriage help, you get out of it what you put into it.
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  If you're given homework, make doing it a priority.
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  And by doing it, I'm not talking about checking the box. It's not busy work.
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  Good counseling will challenge how you see things. This is not an attack.
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  It's based on the reality that you don't see everything as it is.
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  And sometimes that includes your own thoughts and feelings.
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  Expect to find places where you have been wrong. Be open to the possibility
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  your spouse may be right about something you think they have wrong.
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  Also, be open to the possibility that in some things, neither you nor your spouse
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  has it right. Work on yourself and let your spouse work on themselves.
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  This is Paul, and doing marriage well may look different than you think.