Latest / She Rises with Ashy & Tijana / 303. Flashback Friday - Feeling Stuck? It's Time to Choose Yourself

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303. Flashback Friday - Feeling Stuck? It's Time to Choose Yourself · She Rises with Ashy & Tijana

• 0:10
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the She Rises podcast.
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: I'm Ashi.
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: And I'm Tiana.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: This podcast is about female empowerment and encouraging you to
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: be your biggest, boldest, and most authentic version of yourself.
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: We help you shed the shame, grow to a new level.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: We're going to laugh, cry, and talk about the topics
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: everyone else is too afraid to talk about.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: Get ready for your next level self.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: That'd be the biggest piece of advice I would give
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: for anyone feeling really stuck right now is just to
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: actually carve out some time where you can sit with yourself,
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: whether it's in the sunshine, at the beach, sitting in
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: nature journaling, and just sit with and be really fucking
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: honest with where you're at and how you're feeling. Are
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: you happy being a stay-at-home mom? Would you like to
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: go back to work? Are you happy running this corporate
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: job with no freedom, but you're in big money? Or
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: would you like something a little bit more free-flowing? are
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: you really happy in your relationship? Or do you feel
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: like it's hit its point where there's no more growth
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: in that? Yeah. Do you feel like you're stagnant in that?
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: Really be honest with yourself and let those feelings come
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: up and then you can have clarity around what you
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: do with that. It's always a choice.
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: It's like being okay with what you might find. Yeah.
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: Which is scary. I get it.
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: No, but don't fear what comes up. It's like, use it,
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: leverage curiosity, just get curious. And Like it doesn't matter
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: what you explore or, you know, what option you might
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: want to go in, whether it's your career or your relationship.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: Be okay to explore both options, whether you want to stay,
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: whether you want to go, pros and cons. Like what
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: would it look like for both sides? What do you
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: really want? Like that's how you get to know what
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: you really want out of life. And it's really important
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: that we allow ourselves to get clarity but also not
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: put pressure on yourself for clarity. Yeah.
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: You know, explore it.
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: Have fun with it.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: Take time.
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, give yourself time.
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: And you know what too? Staying where I was was
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: going to be hard. Taking a risk and changing my
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: whole life, hard. It's in that moment. It's like, okay, well,
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: which heart am I going to choose? That's right. What's
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: going to benefit my future the most? Both are uncomfortable.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: Both are going to rattle me, but I'm going to
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: choose the heart that feels more aligned and that I
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: know that will benefit. And it's meeting me where I'm
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: at right now, not where I was two years ago.
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: Permission to grow, permission to evolve. You're a new person
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: every single time that you change and grow. Yeah. And
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: like being willing to choose yourself over what other people
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: might have to say around that change and growth. Yeah.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: Like you're congruent. Yeah.
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: It's congruent with what you want or your heart desires
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: and needs now. And it's okay that that changes. If
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: we hate the discomfort that we're feeling right now, okay,
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: what's going to be the action that I can take
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: to get me out of this place of discomfort? Well,
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: it's doing the hard thing so that I can create ease.
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: So instead of it being the problem, what if that
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: was the solution?
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: Oh, my God. Mic drop.
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: Game changer, right? Yeah. And then like what we were
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: talking about earlier, you can change. Like give yourself permission
• 2:56
  Speaker 2: to change. Just because you advocated for one thing, 10
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: years ago, five years ago, two years ago, fucking three
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: days ago. It doesn't matter. You can choose to change
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: in this very moment simply because in your brain, you
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: decided you were different now. Simply because in your mind,
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: you decided I actually don't resonate with that anymore. I
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: actually changed my mind. I actually don't believe in that. Wow.
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: I changed my mind. Everything that happened from here in
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: the past actually is irrelevant. None of it matters, but
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: we hold on to it.
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: Don't we?
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  Speaker 2: We hold on to it because we think I've been
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: this way for so long. I said that. That's right.
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: Now I need to continue being this way. But that's
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: what keeps us stagnant. A lot of the times fearing
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: what other people think about us will keep us more
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: stagnant than actually us not changing.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: Isn't that fucked up too? We're so worried about what
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: other people think of us. We will continue to choose
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: pain and suffering and discomfort and because of what old
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: maid at work might say or Sally underscore 88 says
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: online or what fucking mom or grandma thinks of us,
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: we would choose to stay in that pain.
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: Or our friend that we drink with on the weekend
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: and we're scared of their judgment because we're changing and
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: becoming a different version that they don't resonate with. Like
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: all that matters is what you choose from right in
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: this moment. Actually, not even in the future. The only
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: thing that matters is what you choose in the next
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: 24 hours. Imagine how much less pressure you would feel
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: to just show up and do the things that you
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: want to do that make you fucking happy in the
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: next 24.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: Hours and who are you living for like us having
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: this conversation it's just like i hope this lands for
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: everyone listening who are you actually living for are you
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: choosing your life decisions based on what everyone else thinks
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: of you if i was to do that i wouldn't
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: be here today if i was to listen to everyone
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: online that told me not to do this not to
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: do that that shit that's wrong whatever oh my god
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: i would live in so much regret yeah so much
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: regret Even this is like I've done a couple of
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: different podcasts and the amount of shit I copped when
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: we started this new podcast, here she goes again. Oh, man.
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: I'm not listening to you.
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  Speaker 2: No.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: Look at my past as a failure. All of that
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: has led me to be able to be in this
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: position to do a fucking good job with this podcast
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: because I had the practice runs, you know.
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: And you can apply that to all areas of your life.
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: So cool. But irrelevant.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: People are just hating for the sake of being haters.
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: It's irrelevant. People's words don't matter.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: No, they really don't.
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: Not unless you give them weight.
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: But yeah, stop living your life for other people. What
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: do you actually want? If you're feeling stuck, it probably
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: is because you're so concerned with what everyone else is
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: thinking or because you think you have to stay or
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: remain the same who you were a year ago or
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: five years ago or because you said you're going to
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: do something or commit to something, go to uni, do
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: this job, fulfill this job, commit to the marriage because
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: you said your vows.